1. - So, Copper River next week then?
- Sounds good.Copy !req
2. - Is that a promise?
- You bet.Copy !req
3. All right, fingers crossed.
Tell Theresa I said hi.Copy !req
4. Thanks. Will do, Love.Copy !req
5. I'm an optimist.Copy !req
6. And that, Love, is why I'm gonna say,Copy !req
7. "I can't wait
to tell our story to our kids."Copy !req
8. I know, it's hardly begun,Copy !req
9. but it's how I've always been.Copy !req
10. Even as a kid, one glance from a girlCopy !req
11. and I was trying out
my last name with hers.Copy !req
12. I don't think that's wrong.Copy !req
13. I think love should come out of nowhere,
sweep you up completely.Copy !req
14. But let's not conflate optimism
with certitude.Copy !req
15. I've learned some hard lessons,Copy !req
16. fools do rush in.Copy !req
17. And I've been the fool more than once.Copy !req
18. If I'm honest, I saw red flagsCopy !req
19. and explained them away.Copy !req
20. I wanted love so badly,Copy !req
21. which is why I have to see
with clear eyes now.Copy !req
22. You know what?
I'm gonna wait for the kings.Copy !req
23. - Okay.
- Which is, like, soon?Copy !req
24. Find those flags
before we've gone too far.Copy !req
25. What's her name?Copy !req
26. - Cindy.
- Cindy?Copy !req
27. And this isn't to say
I'm not optimistic, so...Copy !req
28. our story, I suppose it begins a week ago.Copy !req
29. I got here,Copy !req
30. and within minutes, I knew...Copy !req
31. I'm in a strange land.Copy !req
32. Duck-lipped,Copy !req
33. stoned, suspiciously happy lemmings
everywhere you look.Copy !req
34. This guy, LA in a nutshell:Copy !req
35. the Unabomber with a three-picture deal.Copy !req
36. Welcome to a city
where people trying to disappearCopy !req
37. aren't actually trying.Copy !req
38. Can I get a selfie with you?Copy !req
39. Yeah, sure.Copy !req
40. Poor guy.Copy !req
41. - Must really hate all the attention.Copy !req
42. - All right, have a good one.
- Hendy, can I get one?Copy !req
43. And then there was me,Copy !req
44. the one in four million
not wanting to be discovered.Copy !req
45. All right.Copy !req
46. Step one in my effort...Copy !req
47. tacosCopy !req
48. with a man with a meansCopy !req
49. to bring a new, unlocatable me
into existence,Copy !req
50. at least according
to his carefully worded ad on Craigslist.Copy !req
51. Ever think how basically everything now
is GMO frankenfood?Copy !req
52. Like— like, what exactlyCopy !req
53. is all of this hacked corn
doing to our epigenetics, right?Copy !req
54. Apparently, California's got its
own brand of conspiracy theorists.Copy !req
55. Yes, take caution,
lest you have a less-clean liver.Copy !req
56. you can give pigs fresh air
so they don't even need antibiotics.Copy !req
57. Just a thought.Copy !req
58. - Cages are never the answer.
- Totally, never.Copy !req
59. So,
what I need—Copy !req
60. I got you.Copy !req
61. Get out, no trace.Copy !req
62. If I want to leave today, say—
say, to Mexico...Copy !req
63. Great choice.Copy !req
64. Food's cleaner, cheap,
you'll love living there.Copy !req
65. But I can't stay forever.Copy !req
66. I have unfinished business here.Copy !req
67. But would not recommend a return trip.Copy !req
68. Getting out to escape Candace
was imperative,Copy !req
69. but so too was the option to returnCopy !req
70. and actually deal with her
when I was ready.Copy !req
71. What I need is something
more comprehensive.Copy !req
72. Okay.Copy !req
73. Here's the deal.Copy !req
74. Truly airtight, livable ID takes... years.Copy !req
75. The Will you see before you,Copy !req
76. I micro-tweezed
like a bonsai for a decade.Copy !req
77. I'm employable.Copy !req
78. Background check me,
good luck not dozing off.Copy !req
79. Actual face online?Copy !req
80. No, can't find it.Copy !req
81. But google me and I feel real.Copy !req
82. And that, my friend, is a labor of loveCopy !req
83. far too intensive to even put a price on.Copy !req
84. Okay, I get it.Copy !req
85. I appreciate you can even help me at all.Copy !req
86. Uh, so do you have it with you or...?Copy !req
87. Follow me.Copy !req
88. I realized
that with my Candace issues,Copy !req
89. buying what this guy had to offer
wasn't enough,Copy !req
90. and I didn't have ten years
to methodically sculpt a new identity.Copy !req
91. You got the benefit
of being a white dude.Copy !req
92. No one ever suspects shit
when it's a white dude.Copy !req
93. I realized I needed to be him.Copy !req
94. Will seems okay
for a guy who's been in a box for a week.Copy !req
95. Without Mr. Mooney's helpCopy !req
96. it took two full days
to put this thing together.Copy !req
97. Stressful doing it
with Will watching me, tied up.Copy !req
98. You should be so proud of yourself.Copy !req
99. Three quarter-inch plexi's a beast.Copy !req
100. Yet those edges are a thing of beauty.Copy !req
101. attention to detail...Copy !req
102. I gotta think Mooney would be impressed.Copy !req
103. I'm guessing it represents
more to you too.Copy !req
104. Safe space, perhaps?Copy !req
105. One you felt you needed
as a child for protection—Copy !req
106. I know everyone in this town
likes to talk about their feelings,Copy !req
107. so if you want a therapy session...Copy !req
108. tell me about Jasper.Copy !req
109. Look at you now.Copy !req
110. Able to put yourself on the outside,Copy !req
111. that must be so empowering—Copy !req
112. Who... is Jasper?Copy !req
113. Come on.Copy !req
114. He said you have something of his.Copy !req
115. He's looking for me.Copy !req
116. - Cannot keep me in here, Joe.
- I told you, this is temporary.Copy !req
117. Then what is the plan?Copy !req
118. I'm— Look, I didn't—
I'm— I'm sorry. I'm sorry.Copy !req
119. I didn't— I didn't think.Copy !req
120. I acted.Copy !req
121. It was an emergency.Copy !req
122. - You can let me out.
- That's great, I would love to.Copy !req
123. Let's just figure out a way
to do that safely for us both.Copy !req
124. As soon as Jasper goes away.Copy !req
125. See, you're not hearing me.Copy !req
126. This cage isn't great.Copy !req
127. I need light.Copy !req
128. I need my meds.Copy !req
129. This isn't gonna be good for you.Copy !req
130. If you want me to consider your needs...
just tell me what this guy wants.Copy !req
131. Jasper Krenn.Copy !req
132. Met him on what a layperson might term
"the dark web," all right?Copy !req
133. Not even a client.
I looked into the guy...Copy !req
134. didn't like, turned down the gig.Copy !req
135. So you've never even met?Copy !req
136. No.Copy !req
137. He doesn't know what I look like,Copy !req
138. so he won't know that you're just
some random assholeCopy !req
139. who hit me in the head with a brick
and stole my life,Copy !req
140. if that's what you're asking.Copy !req
141. Okay, okay.Copy !req
142. Okay, hold— hold on, hold on. You...Copy !req
143. You charge a fee...Copy !req
144. in advance of meeting.Copy !req
145. You didn't give him his money back.Copy !req
146. That is probably correct.Copy !req
147. You have to pay him back.Copy !req
148. I'd love to help, but I spent it.Copy !req
149. And my earning potential
is somewhat curtailed by being in a cage.Copy !req
150. How much do you owe?Copy !req
151. Three thousand dollars.Copy !req
152. It's no problem.Copy !req
153. It's just 2,700 more than I hadCopy !req
154. due to the lack of planning
that preceded my departure.Copy !req
155. Teach a man to fish...Copy !req
156. you feed him for a lifetime.Copy !req
157. Teach him how to make a counterfeit book,Copy !req
158. and maybe, just maybe...Copy !req
159. he can cobble together
a little something worth...Copy !req
160. Three grand.Copy !req
161. Best I can do.Copy !req
162. Three grand it is.Copy !req
163. I'll admit, bar was low.Copy !req
164. Mooney would have thrown the thing
back at me, had me do it 50 more times.Copy !req
165. Fortunately, an LA bookseller
is practically an oxymoron.Copy !req
166. At least now I'd be able
to send this Jasper fella on his way,Copy !req
167. get back to our story:Copy !req
168. you...Copy !req
169. the person who mayCopy !req
170. just make paying a $3,000 tollCopy !req
171. to stay in this urban GomorrahCopy !req
172. worth it.Copy !req
173. If only you weren't such an early riser.Copy !req
174. It's becoming clear,Copy !req
175. the more I see of you,Copy !req
176. the harder it is to see you clearly.Copy !req
177. If I don't want to get hurt,Copy !req
178. I have to keep a distance
till I've done my due diligence.Copy !req
179. Hey!Copy !req
180. You keep wandering off. Here.Copy !req
181. Though that's hard
when you keep inviting me to things.Copy !req
182. I just didn't want to get in your way.Copy !req
183. Oh, that's impossible.Copy !req
184. Wow!Copy !req
185. Look at that opah.Copy !req
186. - Is that Ecuadorian or local? Thank you.
- Local.Copy !req
187. I know you're making
all of this up to impress me.Copy !req
188. You don't have to try so hard.Copy !req
189. If you told me that fish was an alien,
I would believe you.Copy !req
190. No, that's why it's good
you took me up on this.Copy !req
191. For a guy who works at Anavrin,Copy !req
192. you sorely lack an understanding
of the pescatarian lifestyle.Copy !req
193. I'm a pescatarian ignoramus.Copy !req
194. Are you okay? You look a little...Copy !req
195. Mmm.Copy !req
196. - No.Copy !req
197. Too soon, too much, too good.Copy !req
198. Yeah, I just wanted to stop
thinking about it and just do it.Copy !req
199. Interested?Copy !req
200. Hate the idea?Copy !req
201. I'm sorry, what did you say?Copy !req
202. Lunch today.Copy !req
203. My friends.Copy !req
204. I think we should
just rip the Band-Aid off.Copy !req
205. They're very LA, but they're also great,Copy !req
206. and... they're important to me.Copy !req
207. So...Copy !req
208. And now you want me to meet
your friends?Copy !req
209. I really, really need
a clinical distance. No.Copy !req
210. I'd love to.Copy !req
211. Shit.Copy !req
212. Earth to Spock.Copy !req
213. Come in, Spock.Copy !req
214. Where'd you go, old sport?Copy !req
215. You had that look
like when Keanu sees the black cat.Copy !req
216. "Oh. Glitch in the Matrix."Copy !req
217. We kissed and I saw the ghost
of Guinevere Beck,Copy !req
218. my Matrix is glitching.Copy !req
219. Yeah.Copy !req
220. Yeah, uh, no.Copy !req
221. I'm— I'm fine, thanks.Copy !req
222. You know what?Copy !req
223. Let's see here.Copy !req
224. How about we move the women's lit display?Copy !req
225. Like, why are we separating them?Copy !req
226. That's sexist.Copy !req
227. Right?Copy !req
228. And besides, I woke up
with a completely brilliant idea.Copy !req
229. - What's the idea?
- Movies.Copy !req
230. - On loop in— in the bookstore.
- Oh, no.Copy !req
231. Movies that are— wait for it...Copy !req
232. also books.Copy !req
233. Kill it with fire.Copy !req
234. It's a great idea.Copy !req
235. - Dope movies like Pulp Fiction.
- Not based on a book.Copy !req
236. - Whichever of the Star Wars...
- Again—Copy !req
237. Fifty Shades, obviously.Copy !req
238. One for three, marginally.Copy !req
239. We are gonna sell so many books,
it is going to blow your fucking mind.Copy !req
240. - Can't wait.
- So just come clean this up,Copy !req
241. set up the screen,Copy !req
242. and when it all looks so cute
you wanna fuck it,Copy !req
243. holla at your boy.Copy !req
244. Namaste.Copy !req
245. I'm sorry,Copy !req
246. did you think this was a real bookstore?Copy !req
247. Bless your heart.Copy !req
248. It's cute.Copy !req
249. Hey, Bettelheim?Copy !req
250. Jasper.Copy !req
251. He said that you had something
that you wanted to give back.Copy !req
252. This is Jasper?Copy !req
253. He looks like a manager
at a comic book store.Copy !req
254. Sorry, who you looking for?Copy !req
255. Well, you, Mr., uh, Will B.Copy !req
256. Girl at your apartment
said you worked here.Copy !req
257. Did she mention that I left word for you?Copy !req
258. I'm— I'm sorry. I'm Jasper.Copy !req
259. Oh, right. Man, I have been
having trouble reaching you.Copy !req
260. I'm sorry, my phone's been weird,
you know?Copy !req
261. But here, your money.Copy !req
262. Here.Copy !req
263. - It should all be there.
- All 50 grand?Copy !req
264. I'm sorry, 50?Copy !req
265. That's some of it,
I got to liquidate the rest.Copy !req
266. Oh. Oh, it's okay.Copy !req
267. But I'll need it today.
Is that still all right?Copy !req
268. That's great.Copy !req
269. Perfect.Copy !req
270. Hey, one other thing, uh...Copy !req
271. - Sure.
- Check this out.Copy !req
272. - Wanna show you something.
- What?Copy !req
273. What are you doing?Copy !req
274. It's okay, it's okay. Squeeze hard.Copy !req
275. Right at the knuckle, a little higher.Copy !req
276. Good. Good, good, good, good good.Copy !req
277. Now...Copy !req
278. I'm gonna need you to...Copy !req
279. just gotta hold that for me.Copy !req
280. Great, and, uh...Copy !req
281. drop her in there.Copy !req
282. There you go.Copy !req
283. Now, over at St. Henry's
they have a fantastic microsurgeon,Copy !req
284. Dr. Daniel.Copy !req
285. As long as you're there
in the next 10, 12 hours,Copy !req
286. good chance it'll reattach.Copy !req
287. Provided you have this. So...Copy !req
288. give me a call
when you have the rest of the money.Copy !req
289. Probably sooner
better than later, I'd think.Copy !req
290. Good to finally meet you, Will.Copy !req
291. This is bad.Copy !req
292. Easily leave-town bad.Copy !req
293. But this is your town, Love,
and I can't leave you.Copy !req
294. It's 50 thousand, Will! It's not three!Copy !req
295. Can we please talk about
the $47,000 discrepancy?Copy !req
296. Can we talk about my hand?Copy !req
297. Oh, no.Copy !req
298. I told you everything.Copy !req
299. I told you everything,
and now it's too late.Copy !req
300. I admit, I thought
his whole "needing meds" thingCopy !req
301. was a ploy.Copy !req
302. Fuck Jasper.Copy !req
303. He's just some asshole
Russian mafia-adjacent wanker.Copy !req
304. Were you even followed?Copy !req
305. How would you even know,
you amateur!Copy !req
306. They've found me and it's overCopy !req
307. and you exposed us and now they're...Copy !req
308. Oh... okay.Copy !req
309. Oh... Will?Copy !req
310. Hey, buddy.Copy !req
311. Do you have any money anywhere?
Think, Will, think.Copy !req
312. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Will, listen to me,
no one knows you're here.Copy !req
313. No one can take care of you
if the guy you stole from murders me.Copy !req
314. Am I making sense?Copy !req
315. Rufus...Copy !req
316. he owes me 50 large.Copy !req
317. He's good, he just...Copy !req
318. Text him the code word.Copy !req
319. This is important.Copy !req
320. When I was eight, I broke my arm,Copy !req
321. and they put a pin in it
and it's been transmitting,Copy !req
322. so don't you go to the hospital.Copy !req
323. They will chip you like a dog,
you understand me?Copy !req
324. Thank you so much for caring, Will.Copy !req
325. I can and I will neutralize
that chip for you.Copy !req
326. Okay.Copy !req
327. What was that code word?Copy !req
328. Apparently, Rufus is someone
who conveniently owes WillCopy !req
329. 50 large.Copy !req
330. While this feels too easy,Copy !req
331. right about now the universe
owes me a little easy.Copy !req
332. Spoke too soon.Copy !req
333. That's not gonna work.
I have a lunch with you.Copy !req
334. 12-2.Copy !req
335. And I hate Rufus.Copy !req
336. Damn it.Copy !req
337. I have to cancel our lunch, Love.Copy !req
338. For the record, I'm opening sobbing.Copy !req
339. - Hey.
- Just calling to hear if you were crying.Copy !req
340. - You sound fine.
- Crying on the inside.Copy !req
341. I'm sorry.Copy !req
342. You're direct. You do what you feel.
You just pick up the phone.Copy !req
343. I'm just sorry I'm not gonna see you.Copy !req
344. This is how you handle rejection.Copy !req
345. You want me to not feel bad
about blowing you off.Copy !req
346. What can I say? Forty's a dick.Copy !req
347. He sent me on a run to AlhambraCopy !req
348. to get a sample of the competition's
compostable picnicware.Copy !req
349. Forty said that?Copy !req
350. Well, my coven's gonna be, uh...Copy !req
351. sad they don't get to meet you today.Copy !req
352. Yikes. Please don't let them hex me.Copy !req
353. I'm sorry, I wanted to be there.Copy !req
354. Yeah, I know, me too.Copy !req
355. Talk later, 'kay?Copy !req
356. Wanted to be there so much I decided
I had to at least drop by, you know?Copy !req
357. I don't have the time to join you,
but I can spare a few minutes.Copy !req
358. Especially when I've learned
how friends say so much about a person.Copy !req
359. Will can't make it.Copy !req
360. - He's sorry he can't be here.
- No.Copy !req
361. Like how influenced you are
by their opinion,Copy !req
362. - how much they secretly run your life.
- I'm bummed.Copy !req
363. I was so ready
to meet your new man-friend.Copy !req
364. And by "meet,"
Gabe means "judge and deem unworthy."Copy !req
365. I'm sorry,
who are you talking about?Copy !req
366. Lucy Sprecher.Copy !req
367. She met Love at a rally for LGBTQ rights.Copy !req
368. Back then, Lucy was an unpaid intern.Copy !req
369. Now she's a social savvy power agent
whose clients include all the Jennifers,Copy !req
370. the Kates, and the EU's
top-selling Instagram poet.Copy !req
371. - Okay, okay, okay!
- She is coming for me!Copy !req
372. Just ignore Lucy, she hates everyone.Copy !req
373. Please ignore Sunrise.
She overcompensates for my bitch face.Copy !req
374. Yeah, I do, babe. You're welcome.Copy !req
375. - I love it.
- Okay. Okay, have you...Copy !req
376. Here we go.Copy !req
377. Sunrise Darshan Cummings, Lucy's partner.Copy !req
378. Ironically never met of sunset
she didn't like.Copy !req
379. Stay-at-home mommy blogger,Copy !req
380. and Earth guide
to their adorable toddler, Candle.Copy !req
381. Sunrise cannot be this happyCopy !req
382. unless blending functional mushrooms
in your almond latteCopy !req
383. is the grail we have all been seeking.Copy !req
384. They source it from this incredible
biodynamic flaxseed guy.Copy !req
385. Whatever that meant.Copy !req
386. Gabe Miranda.Copy !req
387. Small business owner,Copy !req
388. which in his case
means a pansexual acupuncturist.Copy !req
389. "Student," air quotes, of psychedelics.Copy !req
390. Mostly dates men, but does something
I'm not gonna try to pronounce,Copy !req
391. that's essentially...Copy !req
392. fingering women to orgasm
on a pile of yoga pillowsCopy !req
393. packaged as a spiritual practice.Copy !req
394. And you and GabeCopy !req
395. go back the farthest.Copy !req
396. Besties.Copy !req
397. So, this Is the Love squad.Copy !req
398. Teeth-achingly, hippy-dippy,Copy !req
399. unaware of the glaring privilege,Copy !req
400. driving their so-called conscious choices.Copy !req
401. Do they secretly want to sleep with you?Copy !req
402. Own you?Copy !req
403. Steal you away?Copy !req
404. To Paris?Copy !req
405. - Oh, my God.
- Will and I kissed.Copy !req
406. - You kissed?
- Yeah.Copy !req
407. I love that.Copy !req
408. I wish Will did,Copy !req
409. 'cause I'm pretty sure I scared him
and now he's avoiding me.Copy !req
410. And this is it,
this is when I get annihilated.Copy !req
411. Well, then maybe he's an idiot
who should go fuck himself.Copy !req
412. Okay, or maybe he's shy.Copy !req
413. Love can be a little forthright.Copy !req
414. Compliment.Copy !req
415. So maybe the idea of meeting
three more of us is genuinely scary.Copy !req
416. You're soft.Copy !req
417. - Am I too forthright?
- No.Copy !req
418. - Real men love that shit.
- Right.Copy !req
419. Let's focus on what
is actually important here.Copy !req
420. Which is...?Copy !req
421. That your heart maybe wants back
in the game.Copy !req
422. Maybe it's time.Copy !req
423. I just, um... like him.Copy !req
424. Aww!Copy !req
425. I know I don't talk about...Copy !req
426. James much.Copy !req
427. I just really thought, you know...Copy !req
428. I met my soulmate,Copy !req
429. and that's done, and...Copy !req
430. so the rest of my life will be,
like, you know...Copy !req
431. Oh, honey, I know.Copy !req
432. No, no, I'm...Copy !req
433. It's fine.Copy !req
434. But no one excites me,Copy !req
435. you know, no one makes me miss them...Copy !req
436. like James.Copy !req
437. But now I'll just be doing something...Copy !req
438. - random and I'll miss Will.
- Aw!Copy !req
439. - I don't even know him.Copy !req
440. - Am I being crazy?
- Oh, no.Copy !req
441. No, I think that maybe...Copy !req
442. maybe you're falling for him a tiny bit.Copy !req
443. - That's so terrifying.Copy !req
444. Aw. That's why
we're here for you, beautiful.Copy !req
445. Waitress,
bring us all the desserts!Copy !req
446. - I want 'em all!
- No!Copy !req
447. Sorry.Copy !req
448. I take it all back.Copy !req
449. I love your friends.Copy !req
450. And I see you, Love,Copy !req
451. I hear you, and...
I get it now.Copy !req
452. Am I losing my mind?Copy !req
453. Hell, I've arrived.Copy !req
454. It's called the San Fernando Valley.Copy !req
455. At the borders of which
anyone with an architect's degreeCopy !req
456. is apparently denied entry.Copy !req
457. A party...Copy !req
458. at noon...Copy !req
459. on a Tuesday.Copy !req
460. Well, I'm glad these people
found each other.Copy !req
461. Look forward to never seeing them again.Copy !req
462. It'd be great if I had
the faintest fucking clueCopy !req
463. what this Rufus guy looks like.Copy !req
464. Hey.Copy !req
465. I'm sorry to bother you.Copy !req
466. Would you happen to know
if there's a Rufus here?Copy !req
467. Are you John Mayer?Copy !req
468. No.Copy !req
469. No, I'm Will. I'm looking—Copy !req
470. There you are, bitch.Copy !req
471. He's not John Mayer.Copy !req
472. You're a manwhore, John Mayer.Copy !req
473. I'm guessing they won't be any help.Copy !req
474. Oh, my God, look over there.Copy !req
475. Oh, my God. It's totally him.Copy !req
476. Hold on.Copy !req
477. - That's airport guy.Copy !req
478. What's he doing here?Copy !req
479. What is it about this guy that makes
people act like they're in a customs lineCopy !req
480. with an ass full of heroin?Copy !req
481. No, it's Hendy.Copy !req
482. You gotta get a picture of him
with me in it.Copy !req
483. Hendy?Copy !req
484. Hendy.Copy !req
485. Okay, Hendy.Copy !req
486. Comedian.Copy !req
487. AKA Henderson. FKA Josh Bunter.Copy !req
488. Kicked cancer. Interesting.Copy !req
489. Is ostentatiously zen about it.
Predictable.Copy !req
490. Wait a second, this is Vacuum Guy?Copy !req
491. Ethan loved this gag.Copy !req
492. Oh!Copy !req
493. Brexit!Copy !req
494. Right?Copy !req
495. Apparently,Copy !req
496. Hendy's got a hard-life-lessons
man-of-the-people thing working for him.Copy !req
497. Apartment three?Copy !req
498. Oh, great.Copy !req
499. Is this party gonna get any more weird?Copy !req
500. - What happened to your hand?
- Uh... Oh, it's...Copy !req
501. Oh, you're really not from here.
I asked, but I actually don't care.Copy !req
502. I've been up for two days
chasing that whole Jared Padalecki thing,Copy !req
503. but he's been laying low,
so I kind of detoured hereCopy !req
504. to find this hairstylist, Kido.Copy !req
505. Word has it he can confirm...Copy !req
506. Really couldn't care less about Kido
or why Delilah's here at all.Copy !req
507. If anything, I've only got more reason
to get the hell out of here.Copy !req
508. Rufus who knows the owner of this house
who's a producerCopy !req
509. - and he knows Kido—
- Wait, I'm sorry, did you say Rufus?Copy !req
510. Yeah, my girl Tanika knows him.Copy !req
511. The friend I'm looking for
has a buddy, Rufus.Copy !req
512. Could you—
could you maybe point him out for me?Copy !req
513. You're kidding me.Copy !req
514. Delilah.Copy !req
515. Hey, long time.Copy !req
516. You look great.Copy !req
517. I look like a walking red-eye
from Pittsburgh, but you look great.Copy !req
518. - What are you doing here?
- Just working on a piece.Copy !req
519. 'Course you are.
Always the smartest girl in the room.Copy !req
520. Yep. It's exhausting.Copy !req
521. Yeah.Copy !req
522. What, d'you go for
the president's curly fries?Copy !req
523. Sorry, this is Will.Copy !req
524. Hi. No, it was an accident at work.Copy !req
525. It might need surgery, but it's, uh,
you know, it's okay.Copy !req
526. Well, if you do, Dr. DanielCopy !req
527. at St. Henry's Medical Center.Copy !req
528. Uh, if you go, tell him we're friends
and he'll hook you up.Copy !req
529. Thank you. Thanks.
Really, I appreciate that.Copy !req
530. - Yeah.
- Hendy!Copy !req
531. Uh... excuse me, guys.
Great to see you, gorgeous.Copy !req
532. Well!Copy !req
533. He seems pretty great.Copy !req
534. Drool a little more,
it's a good look on you.Copy !req
535. Did he come up in one of your pieces?Copy !req
536. Meaning is there shit on him? Scoop?Copy !req
537. - Inquiring minds want to know?
- Never mind. If you don't want—Copy !req
538. Let me just give you
the Idiot's Guide, okay?Copy !req
539. Being famous...Copy !req
540. don't make you magic.Copy !req
541. Cover shit in gold,
it's just super shiny shit.Copy !req
542. I had a feeling you might know that,Copy !req
543. but I was wrong, and now I pity you.Copy !req
544. - Excuse me.
- Hold on. You gonna point out Rufus?Copy !req
545. You're a big boy. Figure it out.Copy !req
546. - Hey.
- Yeah?Copy !req
547. - Rufus would like his Negroni.
- All right.Copy !req
548. Thank you.Copy !req
549. Hi.Copy !req
550. Excuse me.Copy !req
551. Rufus?Copy !req
552. Oh, you found me.Copy !req
553. Yes.Copy !req
554. Hey, lose the clothes if it's all right.Copy !req
555. Hope you like Air Supply.Copy !req
556. I'm kind of kind of
on a ballad jag right now.Copy !req
557. You look different
than your picture on the app.Copy !req
558. It's Todd, right?Copy !req
559. Actually,
I'm here for "Battlestar."Copy !req
560. - You're not Will.
- No.Copy !req
561. He told me to use the code word.Copy !req
562. I'm helping him out.Copy !req
563. Here I'm about to blow you.Copy !req
564. I got your shit in my bag.Copy !req
565. There you go.Copy !req
566. It's okay if I count it?Copy !req
567. You shittin' me?Copy !req
568. These are pills.Copy !req
569. Same ones, man.Copy !req
570. But faster acting.Copy !req
571. I got a new source in Quebec.Copy !req
572. What about the 50 grand?Copy !req
573. The 50 grand?Copy !req
574. Would you settle for that blowjob?Copy !req
575. It turns out
Rufus has been supplying OG WillCopy !req
576. with off-brand Canadian medsCopy !req
577. for a rather severe bipolar disorder.Copy !req
578. Explains so much.Copy !req
579. Evidently,
Will kept just enough of a gripCopy !req
580. to turn me into his TaskRabbit.Copy !req
581. But hey, he needs them.Copy !req
582. Nope, I won't take 'em. Flush 'em!Copy !req
583. Keep your poison.Copy !req
584. What do you mean?Copy !req
585. I went to the Valley for you.Copy !req
586. Farewell to that small part of Will
aspiring to sanity, I guess.Copy !req
587. You'll feel better.Copy !req
588. Yeah, then you take 'em, fucker,
'cause I don't believe you.Copy !req
589. You should believe me!Copy !req
590. Believe me when I tell you...Copy !req
591. I could hand you to Jasper.Copy !req
592. I wouldn't have your problems anymore.Copy !req
593. Learned something today.Copy !req
594. Screaming at crazyCopy !req
595. can reopen a wound.Copy !req
596. Love, this is trial by fire for you.Copy !req
597. Hey, I really think
we need to talk.Copy !req
598. Oh.Copy !req
599. Hey.Copy !req
600. Hey.Copy !req
601. Oh, my God! What happened?Copy !req
602. Oh, it's— it's nothing.Copy !req
603. - Oh, no, what did you do?
- No, it's fine.Copy !req
604. It's a cut, it's nothing.
What do you want to talk to me about?Copy !req
605. You lied to me.Copy !req
606. - What?
- Lunch.Copy !req
607. Forty?Copy !req
608. He's a bad alibi. He's been telling me
everything since we were born.Copy !req
609. Shit.Copy !req
610. - Is Forty your brother?
- My twin brother.Copy !req
611. And you called him a dick,
which he can be,Copy !req
612. but you were also lying.Copy !req
613. You own Anavrin.Copy !req
614. That's what I get for not trying
to find out everything about you first.Copy !req
615. My parents own Anavrin.Copy !req
616. I just work there.Copy !req
617. I was trying not to instantly
complicate thingsCopy !req
618. by waiting to tell you.Copy !req
619. But you...
you complicated things by lying.Copy !req
620. Why would you lie?Copy !req
621. So I could walk through
fire for you.Copy !req
622. So I could slay dragons to stay near you.Copy !req
623. - I just— I don't know you.
- Yet.Copy !req
624. - You don't know me.
- Yeah, well, apparently.Copy !req
625. Because I thought that we were...Copy !req
626. I mean, we kissed, Will.Copy !req
627. This is... This is not a good time.Copy !req
628. This is not good timing.Copy !req
629. This is about your ex, isn't it?Copy !req
630. - Yes.
- No.Copy !req
631. She really hurt you.Copy !req
632. I can smell your shampoo,Copy !req
633. and nothing you're doing is making it
easier for me to see you clearly.Copy !req
634. But guess what? My husband hurt me, too.Copy !req
635. Among other things, by dying.Copy !req
636. So, I understand why this is hard for you,Copy !req
637. but it's also why I just say things now.Copy !req
638. 'Cause there was things
I was waiting to say to him.Copy !req
639. And I— I don't know
if this is just a flingCopy !req
640. or something more, but either way...Copy !req
641. I think it's a mistake to do
the bullshit thing that you're doing.Copy !req
642. - No, it's not bullshit—
- Yes, it is!Copy !req
643. You don't need to run away.Copy !req
644. Please, no.Copy !req
645. - Stop.
- You can—Copy !req
646. Please! Stop!Copy !req
647. Just stop!Copy !req
648. Okay.Copy !req
649. You don't need to yell.Copy !req
650. Ever.Copy !req
651. I liked you.Copy !req
652. This sucks.Copy !req
653. You're bleeding again.Copy !req
654. Why are you here?Copy !req
655. You've actually lost
a lot of blood today, Joe.Copy !req
656. Is that what you are?Copy !req
657. My lost blood?Copy !req
658. Really all-in on this one.Copy !req
659. I guess that's you, right?Copy !req
660. See a girl once.Copy !req
661. I'm— I'm trying...Copy !req
662. to do it right this time.Copy !req
663. As opposed to with me.Copy !req
664. What went wrong with me, Joe?Copy !req
665. We both know what happened.Copy !req
666. You can haunt me forever,Copy !req
667. you will never get me to say
I didn't do everything I could for you...Copy !req
668. - for us.
- Look at me, Joe.Copy !req
669. - No, you are not—
- Look at me.Copy !req
670. You are not here.
I am not arguing with you!Copy !req
671. Hey, Jasper, yeah.Copy !req
672. Yes, it's Will.Copy !req
673. I am on my way.Copy !req
674. Thank you for coming. Is that my...?Copy !req
675. Perfectly preserved
and anxious to get back to Daddy.Copy !req
676. Great. It's right in here.Copy !req
677. Look...Copy !req
678. I am not Will Bettelheim.Copy !req
679. - This is.Copy !req
680. Well, this is a first for me.Copy !req
681. My name is Joe Goldberg.Copy !req
682. I just needed his nameCopy !req
683. and his life for a little while.Copy !req
684. So you put him in
a Hannibal Lecter thing, I see that.Copy !req
685. I assume you realize
that you need psychiatric help?Copy !req
686. I'm not crazy, okay?Copy !req
687. My ex-girlfriend's stalking me
and this is the best I could come up with.Copy !req
688. But can I please have my finger?
'Cause this is Will.Copy !req
689. He took your money. Take him.Copy !req
690. Well, if you couldn't get it out of him...Copy !req
691. Right?Copy !req
692. I mean...Copy !req
693. You sure, now?Copy !req
694. - You ain't got it?
- Please don't.Copy !req
695. You don't have to do this.
You don't have to—Copy !req
696. You see, Joe?Copy !req
697. No.Copy !req
698. You don't understand.Copy !req
699. But I do.Copy !req
700. I'm trying to survive.
He wanted to hurt me.Copy !req
701. Well, you hurt him.Copy !req
702. And you hurt me.Copy !req
703. I loved you.Copy !req
704. - More than I've ever—
- Then you hurt me.Copy !req
705. Look at me, Joe.Copy !req
706. Sometimes...Copy !req
707. we hurt the one we love.Copy !req
708. Right?Copy !req
709. You're not afraid Love will hurt you.Copy !req
710. You're afraid you'll hurt her.Copy !req
711. I'm sorry.Copy !req
712. I'm so sorry.Copy !req
713. No. Please stay.Copy !req
714. Please.Copy !req
715. Stay.Copy !req
716. I'm sorry.Copy !req
717. I'm so sorry.Copy !req
718. Hendy was right.Copy !req
719. Dr. Daniel, one impressive microsurgeon.Copy !req
720. Thank goodness for these pain pills.Copy !req
721. They're gonna block out
more than one type of pain tonight.Copy !req
722. Knocking out Anavrin's security cameras
will cover up another.Copy !req
723. Sometimes I wonder
if I understand love at all.Copy !req
724. The thing transforms us.Copy !req
725. But into what?Copy !req
726. Love turned me into something else
back then with Beck.Copy !req
727. My hope now...Copy !req
728. is that you can turn me
into something better.Copy !req
729. Because of this is all I am,Copy !req
730. I may as well turn myself into Candace.Copy !req
731. Hey.Copy !req
732. Wow, it smells amazing in here.Copy !req
733. I did not just make you an entire meal.Copy !req
734. I am angry and embarrassedCopy !req
735. and I shouldn't have texted you back.Copy !req
736. I just...Copy !req
737. I was just also hungry, so I— you know...Copy !req
738. I'm glad you kissed me.Copy !req
739. It did not seem like it.Copy !req
740. I was.Copy !req
741. I was also freaked out,Copy !req
742. not because you did it,
but because of how it felt.Copy !req
743. I didn't expect...Copy !req
744. - you.Copy !req
745. This.Copy !req
746. I wasn't looking...Copy !req
747. for this.Copy !req
748. I want it, but I can't...Copy !req
749. have it...Copy !req
750. right now with you...Copy !req
751. or— or anyone.Copy !req
752. She really hurt you, huh?Copy !req
753. Mm.Copy !req
754. No.Copy !req
755. No, I hurt her.Copy !req
756. I really hurt her.Copy !req
757. So you understand, I can't—Copy !req
758. Did you wanna hurt her?Copy !req
759. No.Copy !req
760. Of course not.Copy !req
761. So what I'm hearing is that two adults...Copy !req
762. both knowing the risks...Copy !req
763. I don't think she knew.Copy !req
764. Okay, well, you know,
none of us know anything.Copy !req
765. You know?
But you put on your big girl pantsCopy !req
766. and we give things a shot.Copy !req
767. I have to believe that hurting her was
the last thing you wanted to do, right?Copy !req
768. - That was a question.
- Yeah, that's right.Copy !req
769. - Okay.
- Right.Copy !req
770. How about I take care of me...Copy !req
771. you take care of you...Copy !req
772. I try not to hurt you,
you try not to hurt me.Copy !req
773. You know, what else is there?Copy !req
774. I'm just...Copy !req
775. I'm— I'm afraid.Copy !req
776. Yeah.Copy !req
777. Relationships are scary.Copy !req
778. You don't get all that goodness
and possibility with zero risk.Copy !req
779. But, Will...Copy !req
780. you cannot hurt me.Copy !req
781. I want to believe that.Copy !req
782. Okay.Copy !req
783. Thank you.Copy !req
784. I just...Copy !req
785. - Just come here.
- Okay.Copy !req
786. Look, to be honest,Copy !req
787. I feel...Copy !req
788. so shitty...Copy !req
789. about the way it went with her.Copy !req
790. So I can't...Copy !req
791. I can't...Copy !req
792. till she's...Copy !req
793. really gone.Copy !req
794. No, it's valid.Copy !req
795. Yeah, no, I...Copy !req
796. Okay, two things.Copy !req
797. One...Copy !req
798. friends.Copy !req
799. Okay, friends can be good.Copy !req
800. We can just call this a friendship.Copy !req
801. That might help.Copy !req
802. Okay, great.Copy !req
803. Poof, friends.Copy !req
804. And two...Copy !req
805. I felt the same way about James.Copy !req
806. And I don't want to sound corny,
but I did this thing,Copy !req
807. where I took a bunch of his stuff
and I put in a box and I...Copy !req
808. let it go in the ocean.Copy !req
809. I'm not really one to hold on to things.Copy !req
810. It's not... Um...Copy !req
811. You could just, you know, write a note.Copy !req
812. A goodbye.Copy !req
813. Burn it.Copy !req
814. Something.Copy !req
815. And I would help you.Copy !req
816. Friends support each other.Copy !req
817. Whatever you call us...Copy !req
818. - it feels right.Copy !req
819. Because we're an "us."Copy !req
820. And if we are an "us,"Copy !req
821. then, dare I say it...Copy !req
822. this...Copy !req
823. this is home for now.Copy !req
824. And I should probably be a good neighbor.Copy !req
825. Oh...Copy !req
826. Try that guy.
These two are full and that one—Copy !req
827. Eats the quarters, yeah.Copy !req
828. You don't have to be all nice.Copy !req
829. I feel bad, like I did something.Copy !req
830. No, it's not you, you were just
in the line of fire when Henderson...Copy !req
831. We go back.
We met, like, eight years agoCopy !req
832. when I was dancing at this bar downtown.Copy !req
833. Not just to do it, but because I was
actually pursuing something.Copy !req
834. I wanted to be Carrie Fisher.
She's such a great writer.Copy !req
835. But I was stuck in Covina
and my mom was such a cunt,Copy !req
836. and one day, I was just like, "Fuck it.Copy !req
837. Let me get a fake ID and get out of hereCopy !req
838. and go follow my dreams."Copy !req
839. It's hard to imagine her
with dreams.Copy !req
840. Henderson was cool.Copy !req
841. He, like, gave me copies
of Syd Field, Save the Cat.Copy !req
842. And he was like, "You're actually good,"Copy !req
843. which nobody ever...Copy !req
844. And I had heard, or whatever,Copy !req
845. that he had young girls around,Copy !req
846. but I just thought
I was talented and special.Copy !req
847. One day, I was at his place,Copy !req
848. and I had, like, three sips of beer,Copy !req
849. and I got so fucked up.Copy !req
850. Eight years ago? You were, like—Copy !req
851. Seventeen.Copy !req
852. Anyway, I remember being like,Copy !req
853. "How is it ten p.m.?"Copy !req
854. And I look down and...Copy !req
855. my skirt was pulled up.Copy !req
856. So you're saying Henderson—Copy !req
857. Or, hey, maybe my skirt just rode up.Copy !req
858. Have you ever tried...?Copy !req
859. To what? Tell anyone? No.Copy !req
860. Who?Copy !req
861. I tried to do a story years later,
but nobody would talk to me.Copy !req
862. Guess why? They're all like I was.Copy !req
863. Underage...Copy !req
864. strippers...Copy !req
865. not white...Copy !req
866. The world would eat them alive.Copy !req
867. And that's why I don't lose
a drop of sleepCopy !req
868. on any of these motherfuckers
I write about.Copy !req
869. They all deserve it.Copy !req
870. My math says 49% of humanity
deserves to die in a fire.Copy !req
871. Don't do that. You, like...Copy !req
872. You nod as if you're somehow
not one of them.Copy !req
873. Well, let me give you the gift of honesty.Copy !req
874. You...Copy !req
875. act nice because you're not.Copy !req
876. And I may not know
what kind of bad you are...Copy !req
877. but I got my radar the hard way.Copy !req
878. So...Copy !req
879. stay the fuck away from me
and my sister, okay?Copy !req
880. Have a fantastic day.Copy !req
881. Tell me I didn't eat those.Copy !req
882. Do you know...Copy !req
883. how much oxidative stress
those things put on your body?Copy !req
884. I'm guessing a shower
is out of the question?Copy !req
885. Did you say Jasper came around?Copy !req
886. I paid the man.Copy !req
887. And he went on his way.Copy !req
888. If things were different,
I'd say I owe you 50 grand.Copy !req
889. - Why? You got it laying around somewhere?
- Nice try.Copy !req
890. It's spent.Copy !req
891. - What were you thinking?
- Honestly...Copy !req
892. a little while ago I fell in love.Copy !req
893. And she needed help.Copy !req
894. So I just did it.Copy !req
895. You've been putting meds
in my drinks, huh?Copy !req
896. That's green juice.Copy !req
897. Thanks.Copy !req
898. Well, my current reality is...Copy !req
899. suboptimal, but even so,Copy !req
900. upgrade from where I was.Copy !req
901. At one point,
I thought I saw you murder a guy.Copy !req
902. Crazy town.Copy !req
903. Well, glad to have you back.Copy !req
904. I guess it's goodbye, Beck.Copy !req
905. I'm sorry.Copy !req
906. I really am.Copy !req
907. Goodbye, you.Copy !req
908. How did that feel?Copy !req
909. Like a good first step.Copy !req
910. Still can't wait to tell our story
to our kids.Copy !req
911. How we decided to walk before we ran.Copy !req
912. Started out as friends.Copy !req
913. The past...Copy !req
914. is prologue.Copy !req
915. I made mistakes, yes.Copy !req
916. And I'll learn from them.Copy !req
917. Prove...Copy !req
918. I'm worthy...Copy !req
919. of you.Copy !req
920. Hey, should I open another bottle?Copy !req
921. I know we'll get there.Copy !req
922. I'm optimistic.Copy !req
923. It's just...Copy !req
924. who I am.Copy !req