Xavier: Renegade Angel 1x9

Directed by

John Flansburgh as Computer • Junior Brown as (voice) • Rebecca Chandler as (voice) • Cassady Leonard as (voice) • Marcia Levy as (voice)

Xavier must choose between the heart and the mind.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. IT'S WHAT SEPARATES

2. THE WHEAT OF BEASTS FROM THE

3. CHAFF OF CHAPS — FREE WILL.

4. MAN'S MOST POTENT MIRAGE.

5. DO I HAVE THE FREE WILL TO TURN

6. THIS DESERT INTO AN OCEAN?

7. ALLOW THAT I SHOULD WEAVE

8. THEE A TALE OF A LAND ANGEL, A

9. SAND-SEEKER WHO PERCHANCED UPON

10. A CROSSROADS.

11. HE STOOD AT THE FORK, AWASH IN

12. THE FECULENT KNOWLEDGE THAT

13. WHICH PATH HE CHOSE WOULD BRAND

14. HIS LIFE EVERMORE.

15. HE OPENED THE EAR OF HIS SOUL'S

16. EYE TO PROVIDENCE, UNWILLING TO

17. MOVE UNTIL HE WAS SURE WHICH

18. DIRECTION WAS HOLY MOST.

19. FINALLY, HE FELT A COSMIC HAND

20. GUIDING HIM TO THE PATH ON THE

21. LEFT.

22. HEY, FREAK.

23. WE DON'T COTTON TO WEIRDOS IN

24. OUR TOWN.

25. SO SCRAM BEFORE I MAKE YOU TASTE

26. PAIN.

27. DEAD?

28. WHAT DO YOU SEE?

29. WHAT'S THE AFTERLIFE LOOK LIKE?

30. WHAT VISIONS?

31. HE'S DEAD.

32. COMPUTER, EXPLAIN.

33. XAV-V-V-V-IER, ACCORDING TO

34. MY RESEARCH, SOMETHING VERY

35. WEIRD HAPPENED HERE.

36. IF I COULD JUST KNOW

37. WHAT LED UP TO ALL OF THIS.

38. CAN YOU GET AHOLD OF SOME

39. BRAIN MATTER FOR A MEMORY

40. EXTRACTION?

41. NEVER THOUGHT YOU'D

42. ASK.

43. BEFORE WE SING OUR GLORIOUS

44. PRAISE TO THE LORD, IT IS MY SAD

45. DUTY TO ANNOUNCE THAT OUR

46. SIGN-LANGUAGE TRANSLATOR HAS

47. DONATED HER HANDS TO THE NEEDY

48. GROPER SOCIETY.

49. IN HER PLACE, WE HAVE POPO, A

50. VERY SPECIAL GORILLA FROM THE

51. RESEARCH CENTER WHO HAS BEEN

52. STUDYING SIGN LANGUAGE UNDER THE

53. TUTELAGE OF MY WIFE, JUNE, FOR

54. THREE YEARS.

55. THIS GORILLA IS GOOD.

56. SHE'S BLESSED WITH THE HOLY

57. SPIRIT.

58. THAT ANIMAL... SO BEAUTIFUL.

59. WHAT ARE THESE FEELINGS COMING

60. OVER ME?

61. IS SHE CAPABLE OF FEELING THE

62. SAME WAY OF ME?

63. STRANGE.

64. I FEEL LIKE SOMEONE IS RAPING ME

65. WITH THEIR EYES.

66. OOH, THAT WOMAN.

67. SO BEAUTIFUL.

68. I JUST KNOW SHE FEELS THE SAME

69. WAY ABOUT ME.

70. SHE WAS TOTALLY CHECKING ME OUT.

71. YEAH, WE'RE SOUL MATES.

72. I SHALL NOW VOW TO MAKE HER MY

73. BRIDE.

74. THERE — VOW LOCKED IN.

75. YOU ARE MY SPIRITUAL GUIDE.

76. WHAT SHOULD I DO?

77. DARE I FOLLOW MY HEART DOWN THIS

78. UNNATURAL PATH?

79. LET ME SHOW YOU WHAT SHALL

80. PASS UNTO THEE IF YOUR HEART YOU

81. FOLLOW.

82. I JUST NEED A QUARTER.

83. WHAT HAVE I DONE?

84. I'M TOO OVERCOME TO SPEAK

85. ABOUT MY HUSBAND'S MYSTERIOUS

86. DEATH.

87. BUT POPO HAS ASKED TO SAY A FEW

88. WORDS.

89. WHAT'S THAT, POPO?

90. SHE'S SAYING THAT THIS TIME OF

91. GREAT LOSS ILLUMINATES THE BONDS

92. WE SHARE AS A COMMUNITY.

93. AND FOR THAT, WE MUST GIVE

94. PRAISE TO THE LORD.

95. NOW SHE'S BEING VERY ELOQUENT,

96. SAYING SOME VERY TOUCHING

97. THINGS.

98. SHE'S BEING MOVING.

99. STILL BEING MOVING.

100. IT'S SO MOVING!

101. THIS GO-RILLA IS GO-ING

102. PLACES!

103. POPO IS GIVING THANKS FOR

104. EVERYONE WHO COULD MAKE IT HERE.

105. POPO IS OFFERING FAITH IN JESUS

106. AS AN ALLEVIATION TO THE DEEP

107. FEARS IN YOU...

108. I VOW THAT WHEN I

109. MARRY HER, I'LL GIVE HER 100

110. FLOWERS EVERY FIVE MINUTES.

111. VOW LOCKED IN.

112. SOCIETY DON'T ACKNOWLEDGE.

113. IT'S VERY TOUCHING.

114. OH, IT'S SO TOUCHING.

115. SHE'S TUGGING DEEPLY

116. INGRAINED HEARTSTRINGS NOW.

117. PRAISE THE LORD!

118. POPO IS URGING YOU TO DISMISS

119. THE POWER OF YOUR RATIONAL MIND.

120. SHE'S USING FEAR OF DEATH,

121. PLAYING IN YOUR INSECURITIES.

122. THERE'S A ROCK-SOLID ELEGANCE TO

123. THE ARGUMENTS.

124. SO ELEGANT.

125. POPO IS SHATTERING YOUR

126. SOULS.

127. SHATTERING SOULS.

128. POPO IS TAKING OBVIOUS METAPHORS

129. TOO LITERALLY.

130. NOW SHE'S DOING SIGN LANGUAGE.

131. SHE'S MOVING HER HANDS.

132. SHE'S SIGNING IN TONGUES.

133. SHE'S LIFTING HER VOICE, SUCH AS

134. IT WERE.

135. SHE'S RAISING OUR SPIRITS.

136. NOW SHE'S TOUCHING HER FECES AS

137. THEY COME OUT OF HER BOTTOM.

138. NOW SHE'S SNIFFING HER FINGER.

139. OH, SHE OVEREXERTED HERSELF.

140. DADDY!

141. HONEY, I'VE BEEN MOVED BY A

142. BEAST.

143. COME, SIT.

144. YOU'RE 16 NOW, AND I KNOW YOU'VE

145. HAD SEX.

146. OF COURSE.

147. YOU KNOW THAT, DADDY.

148. WELL, WE'RE CHRISTIANS, AND I

149. WANT YOU TO SIGN A REVIRGINATION

150. PLEDGE TO ME AND THE BIG MAN

151. UPSTAIRS.

152. WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?

153. WHERE DID JUNE GO?

154. I VOW TO SEE HER AGAIN.

155. VOW LOCKED IN!

156. I GOT A CONTRACT AT CHURCH.

157. OH, NEAT. LET ME SEE.

158. NO NEED TO READ EVERY WORD,

159. HONEY.

160. IT'S ALL STANDARD LANGUAGE.

161. BOILERPLATE.

162. IT JUST SAYS YOU VOW TO BE A

163. BORN-AGAIN VIRGIN AND NEVER HAVE

164. SEX OUT OF WEDLOCK.

165. SURE, DADDY.

166. AND INITIAL HERE AND HERE.

167. BITE DOWN ON THIS.

168. AND WRITE YOUR MEASUREMENTS

169. HERE.

170. I'M A VIRGIN AGAIN.

171. NOT YET.

172. HYMEN GUY.

173. OH, GOOD. HE'S HERE.

174. HYMEN GUY.

175. WHO'S THIS?

176. YOU WANTED TO BE A VIRGIN

177. AGAIN.

178. HE'S GONNA MAKE THAT DREAM A

179. REALITY FOR YOU.

180. BUT I DON'T WANT A NEW HYMEN.

181. I WANT TO GO OUT.

182. YOU SHOULD HAVE READ THE

183. CONTRACT.

184. NOW, YOU GOT A BUNCH OF

185. CHOICES.

186. WE GOT THE TROPICAL BEACH.

187. THAT'S PIÑA COLADA-CHERRY

188. FLAVORED.

189. WE GOT THE GROWLER, THE GOBBLER,

190. FANGS FOR THE OVARIES.

191. WE GOT THE APPLE DUMPLING GANG,

192. SIGNED BY DON KNOTTS HIMSELF.

193. THE FRENCH TICKLER FOR HER

194. PLEASURE AND HIS AU BON PAIN.

195. WE GOT THE NATURE'S CANDY, MADE

196. FROM RECYCLED ELEPHANT HYMEN AND

197. RAISINS.

198. THE GRAY LADY.

199. IT REALLY DELIVERS.

200. THIS IS THE RICE ROCKET.

201. YOU DON'T WANT IT.

202. IT'S JAP CRAP.

203. THE WE SHALL OVERCOME.

204. THE MUD FLAPS.

205. TURN IT INSIDE OUT.

206. IT'S A DUVET.

207. MOONS OVER MY H-OVARIES.

208. THAT'S AN ANAL HYMEN.

209. THE LOX BOX, FOR FRIGID JEWS.

210. THEY ALL COME WITH THE FREE

211. BANANA, EXCEPT FOR THE WE SHALL

212. OVERCOME.

213. WE WANT THE BASIC MODEL.

214. NOTHING FANCY.

215. STANDARD DOUBLE-WIDE.

216. DADDY, THIS ONE HAS AN MP3

217. PLAYER.

218. CAN I?

219. I COULD NEVER SAY NO TO A

220. VIRGIN.

221. TURN IT ON.

222. WE'RE BACK.

223. WCRST — SUCCOTASH AND THE BIRD

224. IN THE MORNING.

225. THE CHRISTIAN ZOO RADIO

226. HOOTY-HOO, FEATURING SUCCOTASH

227. AND THE BIRD IN THE MORNING.

228. ACCEPT THE SAVIOR, GET INTO THE

229. GLORIOUS KINGDOM OF HEAVEN.

230. SUCCOTASH, SUCCOTASH.

231. CALL US UP, WIN SOME CASH!

232. WE GOT CHRIST, WE GOT FAITH, WE

233. GOT TRAFFIC ON THE 1s, WEATHER

234. ON THE WHAT?

235. WE GOT POPO THE PREACHIN'

236. GORILLA IN THE STUDIO.

237. HOW YOU DOING TODAY, POPO?

238. KING OF MAKING A SPLASH IN THE

239. PREACHING SCENE.

240. MAKE A SPLASH, MAKE A SPLASH,

241. SUCCOTASH.

242. CALL US UP, WIN SOME CASH!

243. WELL, IT'S 5:55.

244. LET'S CHECK IN ON THE 5 W's.

245. WE GOT WHO, WHAT, WHEN, WHERE,

246. WHY — HOW'S THE WEATHER THIS

247. MORNING?

248. WEATHER'S ON THE TRAFFIC.

249. TRAFFIC'S ON THE —

250. NO TIME.

251. SUCCOTASH, SUCCOTASH.

252. WIN SOME CASH!

253. ACCEPT CHRIST INTO YOUR HEART.

254. LOOK DOWN ON US FROM THE

255. GLORIOUS KINGDOM OF HEAVEN.

256. POPO, I UNDERSTAND YOU'RE

257. STARTING YOUR OWN 700 CLUB.

258. SEVEN'S A PRIME NUMBER.

259. YOU'RE IN THE PRIME OF YOUR

260. LIFE.

261. LIFE COULD CHANGE.

262. WIN A CHUNK OF CHANGE.

263. SUCCO-CASH, SUCCOTASH.

264. CALL US UP, WIN SOME CASH.

265. GOT A CALLER ON LINE 7.

266. ARE YOU THERE?

267. YEAH. DID I WIN SOME CASH?

268. OH! SO CLOSE...

269. WAS THE PHRASE THAT PAYS.

270. AND WE GIVE PRAISE.

271. BOW YOUR HEADS.

272. THANKS FOR COMING IN, POPO.

273. COMING UP, WE GOT TRAFFIC ON THE

274. 1s.

275. IT'S TRAFFIC EVERY ONE SECOND.

276. THERE'S TRAFFIC!

277. THERE'S TRAFFIC!

278. NO TRAFFIC! THERE'S TRAFFIC!

279. SIGALERT RAYBIRDS!

280. POPO IS BLESSING YOU ALL FOR

281. TUNING IN.

282. AND SHE'S NOW WELCOMING HER

283. FIRST GUEST.

284. SEEMS TO BE A FAMOUS CHRISTIAN

285. HOLLYWOOD ACTOR.

286. THANKS SO MUCH FOR HAVING ME,

287. POPO.

288. YOU'RE QUITE AN INSPIRATION.

289. I HEREBY VOW TO NEVER

290. DISAPPOINT YOU.

291. HUH?

292. HUH? HUH? IT'S NOT WORKING!

293. THE AUTHOR IS LOBBING LOBBING

294. HOLLOW PRAISE AT POPO.

295. POPO SAYS SHE UNDERSTANDS THE

296. ACTOR HAS A CLIP OF HIS UPCOMING

297. MOVIE.

298. YES.

299. THIS IS A PASSION PROJECT FOR

300. ME.

301. IT'S ABOUT A GOOD CHRISTIAN WHO

302. SACRIFICES EVERYTHING.

303. AND IN THIS SCENE — WELL, JUST

304. TAKE A LOOK.

305. WELCOME TO THE AFTERLIFE.

306. YOU WILL EXPERIENCE AN ETERNITY

307. OF INFINITE JOY IN THIS REALM.

308. BUT MY SEXY WIFE IS STILL

309. DOWN THERE, AND THOSE FILIPINO

310. GATORS ARE ABOUT TO EAT HER!

311. I'M SORRY. YOU CAN'T GO BACK.

312. I'M NOT TAKING NO FOR AN

313. ANSWER!

314. GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HEAVEN.

315. IN THE NAME OF THE FATHER, THE

316. SON, AND THE — HOLY SH—

317. LIFTING "SEVENTH HELLVEN"

318. PART EIGHT TO NUMBER ONE AT THE

319. BOX OFFICE FOR THE NINTH

320. STRAIGHT WEEK, THANKS TO THE

321. POPO-ULARITY OF POPO THE

322. GORILLA, WHO SOME BELIEVE IS THE

323. SECOND OR EVEN THIRD COMING OF

324. THE MESSIAH.

325. MESSIAH OR NOT, POPO HAS

326. LITERALLY CONVERTED EVERYONE ON

327. THE PLANET TO CHRISTIANITY.

328. THAT'S OVER 5 BILLION SERVED.

329. POOR MONKEY.

330. AND AS YOU MAY NOT KNOW, EVERY

331. HUMAN ON THE EARTH IS RIGHT NOW

332. GATHERING IN A CELEBRATION TO

333. ACCEPT POPO AS OUR UNIVERSAL

334. SAVIOR.

335. WE GO THERE LIVE.

336. POPO IS SAYING THAT ONCE WE

337. ALL ACCEPT HER, WE WILL ASCEND

338. INTO GLORY.

339. POPO SAYS 10.

340. POPO SAYS 9.

341. GLORY?

342. I CAN'T LOSE MY LOVE TO GLORY.

343. I'VE GOT TO GET HER.

344. POPO SAYS 1.

345. WE SURRENDER TO POPO!

346. POPO!

347. GOD HAS TAKEN HER!

348. WHAT THE — WEIRD!

349. YOU KNOW, TO BE HONEST, I WAS A

350. TINY BIT SKEPTICAL ABOUT THIS

351. WHOLE "POPO'S THE MESSIAH" THING

352. BEFORE THAT HAPPENED.

353. BUT NOW I REALLY DO SURRENDER

354. TO POPO!

355. WE'RE ALL SPECIAL.

356. SO IF I HAVE SEX WITH THAT

357. GORILLA, THE ENTIRE WORLD WILL

358. GO TO HEAVEN?

359. BALLS NEVER LIE.

360. THE WORLD'S HYMEN SHALL BE

361. RESTORED — INNOCENCE REGAINED.

362. HOT DOG!

363. I'M GETTING ME SOME

364. WORLD-SOUL-SAVING APE

365. SNOOCHIDOO!

366. SUCKER.

367. JUST TELL THEM WHAT THEY WANT TO

368. HEAR — "FOLLOW YOUR HEART."

369. COME ON.

370. YOU'VE GOT TO ME ABLE TO OPEN

371. YOUR MOUTH WIDER THAN THAT.

372. XAVIER!

373. I'VE ANALYZED THE BRAIN

374. J-J-JUICE.

375. THE THOUGHTS — THEY'RE COMING

376. FROM WITHIN YOUR HEAD!

377. GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD!

378. GET OUT OF YOUR

379. HEAD!

380. AND THAT'S WHEN HE REALIZED

381. THAT TO STAND AND CONSIDER ALL

382. POSSIBILITIES IS TO DROWN IN A

383. TUNNELING SEA OF INFINITE

384. POTENTIALITY.

385. SO HE CHANGED HIS MIND AND TOOK

386. THE PATH ON THE RIGHT.

387. HIS RIGHT.

388. IF YOU ARE FACING HIM, IT'S YOUR

389. LEFT.

390. PUSH! HONEY, PUSH!

391. IT'S SOME KIND OF MONSTER!

392. JUST TWO MORE XAVIERS LEFT.

393. OUT THERE.

394. SOMEWHERE.