1. These are my guys right here.Copy !req
2. - Oh, stay back!
- Oh, dude.Copy !req
3. The Booty cheeks
in here are flagrant.Copy !req
4. - They are clapping.
- Yes, they are.Copy !req
5. I think it's time to, uh, home in
on some Valentine's day dates, dudes.Copy !req
6. Oh, yeah.Copy !req
7. Check out this slut-tress
over here, huh?Copy !req
8. Oh, my God.Copy !req
9. Oh, man, I have never seen
anything like it.Copy !req
10. She's absolutely obsessed
with the male human penis.Copy !req
11. And that is awesome,
because we have those things.Copy !req
12. Yeah, last time I checked,
I had one, this morning.Copy !req
13. Could you save our spot,
please? Thank you!Copy !req
14. Uh-oh, dude alert, flying in.Copy !req
15. Pardon the interruption...Copy !req
16. Is more
than a cool show about sports.Copy !req
17. It's also the first words you
heard your future lover spout.Copy !req
18. Yeah, what's your girls' story?Copy !req
19. Are you sponsored by penis,
or what? 'cause that's cool.Copy !req
20. Are you guys talking to us?Copy !req
21. Uh, yeah, you idiot.Copy !req
22. Of course we are.Copy !req
23. I feel like some intros are in order.Copy !req
24. This rock star to my I-izz-eft
is Bl-izz-ake.Copy !req
25. And Blizz be sportingCopy !req
26. one of the most deep-throatable
"lap hogs-sah"Copy !req
27. in this piece.Copy !req
28. Fantastic.Copy !req
29. Oh, oh, oh, oh.Copy !req
30. Oh, can't get it out!Copy !req
31. We call that the
"German house music" right there.Copy !req
32. And this tall drink of champagne
over here is the homey Andre.Copy !req
33. He will lap you up.Copy !req
34. Like a dog drinking water.Copy !req
35. Oh, he's thirsty.
Oh, he's thirsty.Copy !req
36. Last, but definitely not gay...Copy !req
37. Straight dude.Copy !req
38. My main man Airwolf, aka Adam.Copy !req
39. He's the kind of guy
that you don't wantCopy !req
40. to bring home to mom.
Tell 'em why.Copy !req
41. 'Cause I'll fuck your mom.Copy !req
42. Ah...Copy !req
43. Ow!Copy !req
44. Ow!Copy !req
45. I don't get it.Copy !req
46. I felt like
I played that exactly right.Copy !req
47. And she stabbed me in the head.Copy !req
48. What can I say?Copy !req
49. Another Valentine's day with my boys,Copy !req
50. eating heart-shaped pizza
from Rancho Cucapizza.Copy !req
51. - Yummy.
- Oh!Copy !req
52. Guys, we should be eating
Rancho Cuca-penoche.Copy !req
53. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
54. And we did not rehearse
that Lisa Loeb songCopy !req
55. for five hours not to serenade
our Valentine's day dates, dudes.Copy !req
56. This is making me sad
and I hate being sad.Copy !req
57. Let's go do something un-sad.Copy !req
58. Like watching pornog together
on the big screen.Copy !req
59. That sounds awesome.Copy !req
60. No! Don't you understand?Copy !req
61. Porno's the reason we don't know
how to talk to girls.Copy !req
62. What?Copy !req
63. - Pornog...
- Thank you.Copy !req
64. Is the reason we don't know
how to talk to girls anymore.Copy !req
65. Okay, it's melted our brains into...Copy !req
66. Porn juice or something,
I don't know.Copy !req
67. But we got to meet real chicksCopy !req
68. or else we're never
gonna be real men.Copy !req
69. Okay, sure.Copy !req
70. But where are you supposed
to meet real chicksCopy !req
71. with 48 hours until the big day?Copy !req
72. Realchixxxchat.com.Copy !req
73. Webcam girls?
Come on.Copy !req
74. - This is pornog, right?
- Mm-mm.Copy !req
75. I'm sorry.Copy !req
76. These are real girls
that happen to be online, right?Copy !req
77. Looking for real guys like us
in the real world.Copy !req
78. Yeah, they're real chicks,
they're just sitting there.Copy !req
79. Sometimes they're eating food,
sometimes they're masturbating.Copy !req
80. Plus these real chicks
are going solo.Copy !req
81. Everybody knows
it takes two to porno.Copy !req
82. - Pardon me, pornog, Blake.
- Oh, thank you.Copy !req
83. Holy wobbly-woos.Copy !req
84. We got bb-dubs.Copy !req
85. Look out.Copy !req
86. We got some dominatrix.Copy !req
87. - Muscle babes.
- I'm into that.Copy !req
88. I like vascularity in the breasts.Copy !req
89. Oh, check out this girl
with the Tina fey glasses.Copy !req
90. I wouldn't mind getting
in her bossy pants.Copy !req
91. Stylish, sophisticated.Copy !req
92. Says her name is Justanna.Copy !req
93. Ooh.Copy !req
94. Tokens, we love tokens.Copy !req
95. She's magnificent!Copy !req
96. You know what feels really good?Copy !req
97. Tokens.Copy !req
98. She's breathtaking.Copy !req
99. She's slapping her pussyCopy !req
100. elegantly.Copy !req
101. Wow, look at all the dudes
in this room.Copy !req
102. It's a packed house, check it out.Copy !req
103. They're all checking a load of her.Copy !req
104. I just painted this one,Copy !req
105. because I love beautiful
lookout points.Copy !req
106. Zoiks! She's an art babe!Copy !req
107. Methinks I'm in love.Copy !req
108. Ooh, thanks for the tip,
kevinjamesfan6.Copy !req
109. - Oh, God! These guys are animals.
- The next guy to go privateCopy !req
110. gets to see me paint a masterpiece.Copy !req
111. - Go private.
- Wait.Copy !req
112. It's credit card only though.Copy !req
113. I don't care.
I'm on it, boys.Copy !req
114. - Oh, yeah.
- That's okay, yeah, baby.Copy !req
115. - Wait, wait, wait, wait...
- Saving her life.Copy !req
116. Before we take the honorCopy !req
117. of going private with Justanna,
I wanna make it clearCopy !req
118. that we do not crank downCopy !req
119. under any circumstances.Copy !req
120. We will treat her like a lady.Copy !req
121. We will treat her like a real chick.Copy !req
122. You know, but what is the
definition of "cranking down"?Copy !req
123. The definition of "cranking down" isCopy !req
124. grabbing your penis and thrusting itCopy !req
125. until you climax.Copy !req
126. Grabbing your penis
and thrusting it? Sure.Copy !req
127. - Cool, cool.
- I promise.Copy !req
128. Here we go.Copy !req
129. Ooh, hey, boys.Copy !req
130. Hey!Copy !req
131. Wow, three boys?Copy !req
132. So much to love.Copy !req
133. Tell me about yourselves.Copy !req
134. Well, I feel the easiest way
to do that would be...Copy !req
135. and a three, and a two, and a...Copy !req
136. Here's my trick.
It is called...Copy !req
137. "Rocking our baby."Copy !req
138. That's our baby right there.Copy !req
139. And I drop the baby,
and then I catch it.Copy !req
140. - I will be a great dad.
- Whoo!Copy !req
141. I mean, as soon as you have
him treating you that way...Copy !req
142. abusive... you get the heck
out of there.Copy !req
143. - Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.Copy !req
144. - No. What?
- Aren't we done?Copy !req
145. It's not that bad, I guess.Copy !req
146. I love you so much.Copy !req
147. Oh, oh!Copy !req
148. Stay.Copy !req
149. And we'll be backCopy !req
150. with more Workaholics.Copy !req
151. Who's crying?Copy !req
152. Hey, whoa, whoa, hey,
hands where I can see 'em, man.Copy !req
153. We said no cranking down!
That's part of the agreement.Copy !req
154. I'm not cranking down!Copy !req
155. What the hell's going on in here?Copy !req
156. Oh, he's trying to hands-free ejack!Copy !req
157. - What?
- Yeah. We watched some yoga guy do itCopy !req
158. in a video the other day.Copy !req
159. This is legal.
I'm not using hands.Copy !req
160. - We said cranking down.
- No, no, not legal.Copy !req
161. Slack your bone now, Adam.Copy !req
162. I will tell myself
when to slack my bone.Copy !req
163. - I'll slack it for you!
- Oh, you're gonna slack it for me?Copy !req
164. Hey, morning, boys.Copy !req
165. Hey!Copy !req
166. Must have fallen asleep.Copy !req
167. Have you guys been watching me
all night?Copy !req
168. Yeah, well,
these two bozos fell asleep,Copy !req
169. but...Copy !req
170. I watched you all night long.Copy !req
171. That's sweet.Copy !req
172. - I dreamt about you.
- Yeah.Copy !req
173. Anyway, I made you breakfast.Copy !req
174. I got some toast, some Beerios,Copy !req
175. extra carbs for masturbating all day.Copy !req
176. You guys are the best, I mean it.Copy !req
177. We're feeling you too.Copy !req
178. So we're gonna go, 'cause we got work,
we're gonna be late.Copy !req
179. I'm glad you enjoyed breakfast.
See ya.Copy !req
180. We got computers at work,
we'll see you in 30.Copy !req
181. I don't get it.Copy !req
182. Why would realchixxxchat be
a forbidden website?Copy !req
183. Makes no sense.Copy !req
184. The company's only supposed
to block pornog.Copy !req
185. Does the name realchixxxchatCopy !req
186. even sound remotely
like a porno site?Copy !req
187. What next?
He's gonna block Google?Copy !req
188. Because there's two "o's,
and they look like breasts?Copy !req
189. That doesn't make any sense.Copy !req
190. You can watch all kinds of stuff.Copy !req
191. Yes, lord knows, last week,
all we were doing all dayCopy !req
192. was watching breast-feeding videos.
- Yeah.Copy !req
193. And those Brazilian kids that
were dancing behind each other.Copy !req
194. They were like five years old.Copy !req
195. Justanna, right now, is going
private with a ton of dudes.Copy !req
196. Probably rich dudesCopy !req
197. who are wearing Aristotle
and Ambercrombie & Fidge.Copy !req
198. And we're just sitting here
all merona-ed out.Copy !req
199. Okay, she's a real chick.Copy !req
200. So we need
to treat her like a real chickCopy !req
201. and force her to love us.Copy !req
202. - Sure, yeah.
- Thank you.Copy !req
203. I got it.Copy !req
204. But, dude, we can't flex on fools,
if we can't even log on.Copy !req
205. Alice's computer accesses pornog.Copy !req
206. How do you know that?Copy !req
207. Because sometimes...Copy !req
208. I masturbate in her office.Copy !req
209. Alice, you're not gonna believe this.Copy !req
210. We just saw your ex-husband
in the parking lot.Copy !req
211. Ooh! For Valentine's day?Copy !req
212. That is so cute.Copy !req
213. My ex is in the parking lot?Copy !req
214. Yeah.Copy !req
215. And he's asking for you.Copy !req
216. He mentioned he had
a surprise. It's flowers.Copy !req
217. For Valentine's day!
Oh, my God!Copy !req
218. - It makes so much sense!
- There are flowers.Copy !req
219. I haven't seen that jerk
in, like, four years.Copy !req
220. I wonder who died.
Excuse me.Copy !req
221. - Yeah.
- Okay.Copy !req
222. - He probably still loves you.
- Yeah.Copy !req
223. See what...
go, go, go, go.Copy !req
224. Justanna better not be showing
her milk missilesCopy !req
225. to the whole goddamn world.Copy !req
226. Men can be such creeps.Copy !req
227. Maybe I should go on first, alone.Copy !req
228. Mmmmaybe I should
probably go on first,Copy !req
229. to protect her from assholes
like kevinjamesfan6.Copy !req
230. - Hmm, no, no.
- Excuse me!Copy !req
231. - Hmm, no, okay?
- Pardon me.Copy !req
232. - Pardon moi, all right?
- Pardon me.Copy !req
233. 'Cause I think I should take
the lead here, boys,Copy !req
234. because I did mention
that I had a question about art.Copy !req
235. Hey!Copy !req
236. Look who's just in time
to see me slap it!Copy !req
237. Hey!Copy !req
238. Okay, okay.Copy !req
239. I took my time to create a
composite of both of our faces,Copy !req
240. so we can see
what our child would look like.Copy !req
241. Bad dad.Copy !req
242. I'm calling him Justsven.Copy !req
243. - He's got your eyes and my mouth.
- Oh, very homely.Copy !req
244. Bad genes, bad genes.Copy !req
245. Oh, I've always wanted a little boy.Copy !req
246. Well, you got one!
He's got your eyes.Copy !req
247. And also, I'd love to take you to
lookout point of Rancho Cucamonga.Copy !req
248. - Okay, excuse me.
- Romantic.Copy !req
249. Actually, we said one topic per.Copy !req
250. - So it's my turn.
- It's romantic.Copy !req
251. And I would like to ask youCopy !req
252. to wobble your noobs back and forth,
so I can ejaculate in my pants.Copy !req
253. Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Hey! Hey! Hey!Copy !req
254. Hold your "horse-ti-cles," okay?Copy !req
255. - We said no masturbating!
- I'm not masturbating.Copy !req
256. And actually we said,
"no cranking down."Copy !req
257. And I'm not cranking down.Copy !req
258. I'm just trying
to secrete my love to you...Copy !req
259. - Stop it.
- Without using hands.Copy !req
260. That's enough.Copy !req
261. And that's not creepy.Copy !req
262. Go ahead and put
your blouse back on, hon.Copy !req
263. I have a question about art.Copy !req
264. Okay?
Will you paint me nude?Copy !req
265. All right, all right,Copy !req
266. that actually could be
the one I'm doing.Copy !req
267. Stop it!Copy !req
268. You're really here.Copy !req
269. Look, you hurt me really bad,Copy !req
270. but I'm willing
to give you another cha...Copy !req
271. you're my secret admirer?Copy !req
272. Game on.Copy !req
273. Does this body work for you?Copy !req
274. It's actually very hard.Copy !req
275. - It's very hard.
- My body, your face.Copy !req
276. Oop!Copy !req
277. Oh, it's...Copy !req
278. so...Copy !req
279. That is enough.Copy !req
280. That was not my ex-husband.Copy !req
281. You know, I thought
that he looked a lot like Bill.Copy !req
282. I was like, "her ex-husband
looks a lot like Bill."Copy !req
283. - I just put it together.
- Yeah.Copy !req
284. Jillian!
She pranked us.Copy !req
285. We all just got joshed.Copy !req
286. I do not appreciate itCopy !req
287. when people fuck
with my personal life.Copy !req
288. Now clock out and go home!Copy !req
289. - Now!
- Okay, totally.Copy !req
290. Very sorry, all right.Copy !req
291. I can't believe I didn't get
to say good-bye.Copy !req
292. Didn't say... dude,
we almost lost our jobs today.Copy !req
293. Um, I don't think we should be having
this conversation without Justanna.Copy !req
294. No, we should not, okay?Copy !req
295. We need to actually just stop
this whole Justanna addiction.Copy !req
296. I'm sorry, but someone's got
to be the adult here.Copy !req
297. Where are you going?Copy !req
298. I'm going for a rip on my Bianchi.Copy !req
299. What's it look like?Copy !req
300. I got to blow some steam off.Copy !req
301. So what?Copy !req
302. You just take a dump on my dreams,
then you leave?Copy !req
303. It's what I do best.Copy !req
304. That guy.Copy !req
305. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?Copy !req
306. Let's go...Copy !req
307. - Get his laptop.
- Make a salami sandwich.Copy !req
308. You know, it's crazy,Copy !req
309. from up here, Rancho Cucamonga
seems like a small town.Copy !req
310. You know, someday,
this city could be all ours?Copy !req
311. Oh, it's just so beautiful
up here, Anders.Copy !req
312. Actually, um...Copy !req
313. I've got a hard on.Copy !req
314. Oh, well, then
why don't you pull it outCopy !req
315. and stroke it and...Copy !req
316. I'll turn my pussy into a glove.Copy !req
317. Okay, all right.Copy !req
318. God, you're such a real chick.Copy !req
319. I love it.Copy !req
320. Now, if we do this,Copy !req
321. I would love for you
to call me your fav.Copy !req
322. Call me Dave, your fav.Copy !req
323. No, David, your favor-ID.Copy !req
324. - Hey, David!
- What?Copy !req
325. - Okay, say I'm your Valentine.
- We knew you'd be at lookout point.Copy !req
326. How cliche can you get,
you backstabbing slut?Copy !req
327. Oh, you said no cranking down.Copy !req
328. You're such a hypothetical.Copy !req
329. You're a hypothetic.Copy !req
330. Yep, and disgusting.Copy !req
331. Hey, guys, I told him to pull it out.Copy !req
332. Hey, Justanna, the men are talking.Copy !req
333. So that whole song and dance
about breaking upCopy !req
334. was all a bunch
of baloney sandwich meat?Copy !req
335. - It's my laptop!
- Your laptop?Copy !req
336. - It's my laptop.
- Your laptop?Copy !req
337. More like, soar, laptop!Copy !req
338. - Justanna!
- What have you done?Copy !req
339. I immediately regret doing that.Copy !req
340. - I'm sorry about that.
- Look at us!Copy !req
341. We're supposed
to be in this together!Copy !req
342. Hey, dorks!Copy !req
343. Shut up!Copy !req
344. I'm trying to finish this
"v" day with a BJ!Copy !req
345. High school BJs, dude.Copy !req
346. Miss 'em.Copy !req
347. I got like...Copy !req
348. I never got one.Copy !req
349. That's what time travel is
gonna be for.Copy !req
350. Hey!Copy !req
351. Shh!Copy !req
352. Oh, hey, boys.Copy !req
353. We're hopingCopy !req
354. that you would join us in real life,Copy !req
355. in reality,Copy !req
356. uh, for Valentine's day.Copy !req
357. Just the four of us.Copy !req
358. Wait, I just put in $500 worth
of time the other day.Copy !req
359. Why don't you just put in
a little more, okay?Copy !req
360. Because I can't,
my credit card's maxed out.Copy !req
361. I bought a laptop.Copy !req
362. What kind
of Bobo credit card do you have?Copy !req
363. It's not Bobo, it's Discover,
and it pays to, okay?Copy !req
364. Doesn't seem like it.Copy !req
365. 'Cause you're the one
who maxed it out,Copy !req
366. trying to hands-free Jack when...
really?Copy !req
367. That's a worthy endeavor.Copy !req
368. You don't have
the mental bandwidthCopy !req
369. to pull that off, playboy.Copy !req
370. - I don't have the mental bandwidth?
- No.Copy !req
371. You have no idea how wide my band is.Copy !req
372. - It's like a cat's tail.
- You know what?Copy !req
373. I'll hands-free right now.
Watch, in public.Copy !req
374. - Go for it.
- Watch, I'm doin' it.Copy !req
375. I'm at half-mast already.Copy !req
376. - Hey, fellas.
- I'm gonna blow in a minute.Copy !req
377. If you could be quiet for one minute,Copy !req
378. I will explode in my pants.Copy !req
379. - Cool it!
- People will see you.Copy !req
380. Okay, there's a lot of pressure here.Copy !req
381. There's too much pressure.Copy !req
382. I need you,
I need my dude crew, right now.Copy !req
383. Because I'm gonna ask her
if we can go privateCopy !req
384. for free, all right?
Just for a second.Copy !req
385. - Just for your daddies.
- No, I'm not allowed.Copy !req
386. Okay.Copy !req
387. You've got to be kidding me.
What?Copy !req
388. That was fun!Copy !req
389. All right, kevinjamesfan6 says,Copy !req
390. "pay up or shut up.Copy !req
391. Now start beating your bread box"?Copy !req
392. - Oh, you don't...
- That's our girl!Copy !req
393. You don't talk
to our woman like that!Copy !req
394. Tell him to...Copy !req
395. - Uh...
- Mm...Copy !req
396. What did we say to that one guy?Copy !req
397. We were leaving the bar...Copy !req
398. - You said...
- No, and I said,Copy !req
399. - "oh, suck it."
- Yes!Copy !req
400. I said "suck it."
With, like, three "u's though,Copy !req
401. so he knows we mean business.Copy !req
402. Anna! I'm being told there's
someone in your chat roomCopy !req
403. hassling customers, is that right?Copy !req
404. Well, block him,
and get back to slapping it!Copy !req
405. Now!Copy !req
406. - Banned?
- What?Copy !req
407. Fu-u-u-u-udge!Copy !req
408. Uh, Superfudge.Copy !req
409. Judy Blume.Copy !req
410. It's a... literary classic.Copy !req
411. So, according to my credit card bill,Copy !req
412. this is the real chick's chat office.Copy !req
413. We just need
to be some polite-ass dudes,Copy !req
414. charm the fuck out of the secretary.Copy !req
415. Oh!Copy !req
416. She'll probably tell us
where Justanna lives.Copy !req
417. Yeah, then we can tell 'em about
that abusive boyfriend dude.Copy !req
418. That's right.Copy !req
419. And then we can have
Justanna move in with us,Copy !req
420. for at least Valentine's day.
- What? You're leaving? No, stay.Copy !req
421. No, I thought
you would have left already.Copy !req
422. I thought I could leave,
but I was wrong.Copy !req
423. Mm! Drama.Copy !req
424. Girlfriend, please.Copy !req
425. Have you guys seen Entourage?Copy !req
426. His name's "drama," he's funny.Copy !req
427. I think he's, like, the funny one.Copy !req
428. Oh, my God.Copy !req
429. You guys.Copy !req
430. You guys, we had it all wrong.Copy !req
431. Realchixxxchat is like
a giant sex prison.Copy !req
432. Our plan just shape-shifted.
We got to save these girls, man.Copy !req
433. We got to go find Anna, and then we got
to open up a battered-women's shelter.Copy !req
434. - At our house, preferably.
- I say we split up,Copy !req
435. just in case one of us
gets caught or something.Copy !req
436. I'll go this way.
Psych.Copy !req
437. I'm going this way.
Justanna!Copy !req
438. Justanna!
Justanna!Copy !req
439. I saved your life.Copy !req
440. You're free! Run!Copy !req
441. Come on, you're free!
Get out of here!Copy !req
442. Justanna?Copy !req
443. Oh, hey!
Damn, girl.Copy !req
444. Hey, just...
oh, I'm sorry.Copy !req
445. Justanna?Copy !req
446. You're free to go, okay?
Get out of here.Copy !req
447. Excuse me,Copy !req
448. uh, I'm looking for Justanna.Copy !req
449. - I was gonna free her.
- Justanna?Copy !req
450. Yeah, I mean, I'll free you too.
See, it's no big deal.Copy !req
451. - God, boy!
- Jeez!Copy !req
452. Get back here and suck my dick.Copy !req
453. - Justanna!
- Strong!Copy !req
454. You're free, go.
Go, tan!Copy !req
455. Go tan!
It's still sunny out!Copy !req
456. Holy shit!Copy !req
457. Suck it.Copy !req
458. Oh! Come on, let's go!Copy !req
459. You don't have to be here anymore.Copy !req
460. Hey! My show! My tips!Copy !req
461. - Motherfucker!
- Ow!Copy !req
462. - You get your ass out!
- Ow! Ow! Oh, Jesus!Copy !req
463. Justanna!Copy !req
464. - Oh!
- Justanna!Copy !req
465. Oh, my God! We're gonna
come back for you guys.Copy !req
466. We're gonna free those... you.Copy !req
467. - Justanna!
- Yeah, it's on now!Copy !req
468. Animals.Copy !req
469. Were they chasing you?Copy !req
470. Justanna?Copy !req
471. Nope.Copy !req
472. Just me.Copy !req
473. Great job, fellas.Copy !req
474. Trespassing and possibly assault.Copy !req
475. Cops will love that.Copy !req
476. No, the cops are gonna love you.Copy !req
477. Because you're running
a sex trafficking business.Copy !req
478. Sex trafficking?Copy !req
479. I'm on the board of
the chamber of commerce, fellas.Copy !req
480. Well, then you let her out
of that chamber!Copy !req
481. Of commerce.Copy !req
482. Hey, look, man, all right?Copy !req
483. Justanna's our sweetheart, okay?Copy !req
484. She's everybody's sweetheart.Copy !req
485. We're not leaving without her.Copy !req
486. Okay, I'll call her in.Copy !req
487. Anna?Copy !req
488. Anna?Copy !req
489. I don't know how to work the phone.Copy !req
490. So maybe we should just go to her.Copy !req
491. Ooh, that's naughty.Copy !req
492. You're bad.Copy !req
493. - Here we go.
- Justanna!Copy !req
494. It's me! It's us!Copy !req
495. Hey! Hey!Copy !req
496. - Hands off!
- Okay.Copy !req
497. These guys came here
to rescue you, Anna.Copy !req
498. They said you're their sweetheart.Copy !req
499. What are you guys doing here?Copy !req
500. Uh...Copy !req
501. Well, if you must know,Copy !req
502. we think we're falling for you, babe.Copy !req
503. Like, in the love way.Copy !req
504. Blake, you guys don't even know me.Copy !req
505. I think we actually know
a lot about you.Copy !req
506. There's a little twinkle in your eye,Copy !req
507. you have those cute little glasses,Copy !req
508. and the way you smack your pussy.Copy !req
509. Okay, well, what you don't know isCopy !req
510. that three babies crawled
out of here.Copy !req
511. But what about
the paintings? Your art?Copy !req
512. You can't just flush
your dreams down the toilet.Copy !req
513. The art is just a gimmick.
Keith paints these.Copy !req
514. You like 'em, right?
Cool paintings?Copy !req
515. No, they're bad, they're terrible.Copy !req
516. It's like a stupid,
dumb baby drew 'em.Copy !req
517. - Oh, a dumb baby drew this?
- Dumb little baby.Copy !req
518. You're showing your ignorance
of composition.Copy !req
519. Okay, so we're hereCopy !req
520. because you're the happiest,
most joyful personCopy !req
521. that we've ever shared
our lives with.Copy !req
522. And we want to share
the rest of our lives with you.Copy !req
523. I've been in and out
of psych wards my whole life.Copy !req
524. You guys just don't want to be aloneCopy !req
525. on another Valentine's day.Copy !req
526. That's...Copy !req
527. - yeah, that's it, sure.
- Okay.Copy !req
528. I tell you what.Copy !req
529. How about tonight, and tonight only,Copy !req
530. I come, uh, hang out with you guys?Copy !req
531. What do you say?Copy !req
532. Three giant babies crawled
through that vagina hole?Copy !req
533. - Oh, man.
- Pass!Copy !req
534. And she was committed?Copy !req
535. So she's, like, a nuts person?Copy !req
536. Oh, yeah, let's not forget
the most important thing.Copy !req
537. She wasn't an artist, okay?Copy !req
538. Deal breaker.Copy !req
539. - Not for me.
- Right, sure.Copy !req
540. It was more the crazy thingCopy !req
541. and all the babies crawling
out of her vag.Copy !req
542. - Thought she was an artist, and she
lied to us. - Three gross little things.Copy !req
543. Can we get two kamikazes?Copy !req
544. But...Copy !req
545. She did teach us how to talk
to real chicks.Copy !req
546. Yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
547. Yo!
Hey, what's up?Copy !req
548. How about I intro you birdsCopy !req
549. to my main man Der-kenstock
over there?Copy !req
550. Over here!Copy !req
551. We call him the plumber,Copy !req
552. because he will straight fix
your leaky pipes.Copy !req
553. He ain't lyin'.
Speaking of lion...Copy !req
554. My main man with the mane, ma'am,Copy !req
555. this is Blake, ma'am.Copy !req
556. Hung like a rhino,Copy !req
557. and educated about women's bodies,Copy !req
558. like a gyno... cologist.Copy !req
559. - Floop!
- That was good.Copy !req
560. That was really good, Ders.Copy !req
561. - "Like a gynecologist."
- That's a vaginal doctor.Copy !req
562. - Right.
- That's him.Copy !req
563. I can hear that, I can hear that.Copy !req
564. - That's checking out.
- Yeah, it is.Copy !req
565. And last, but definitely not gay...Copy !req
566. - Mm-mm.
- No can do.Copy !req
567. - Pew-pew! Pew-pew!
- We got Adam.Copy !req
568. And why don't you ladies
go ahead and give him a hand?Copy !req
569. Because he doesn't need one.Copy !req
570. Oh, we're doing that?
Oh, we're doing that right now?Copy !req
571. Bring it on, man.Copy !req
572. I think I can handle that.Copy !req
573. Oh, I'm at half-mast already.Copy !req
574. - Get it, boy.
- Hoo! Hoo!Copy !req
575. Papa came to play.
Papa came to play.Copy !req
576. He's hands-free masturbating
in front of you.Copy !req
577. Oh, it's working!
It's actually...Copy !req
578. - oh!
- Whoa! Oh! Oh!Copy !req
579. All right.Copy !req
580. You got me wet.Copy !req
581. How about I return the Favreau, John?Copy !req
582. - Nice.
- Oh!Copy !req
583. - He's a direct...
- Hey, what are you doing?Copy !req
584. Whoa, man, okay.Copy !req
585. What do you say we just go
home and boot up some porno?Copy !req
586. Yeah, I'd love to.Copy !req
587. We don't have a laptop, remember?Copy !req
588. Wild Things is on Starz at 8:50.Copy !req
589. - That's a date.
- It's been a while since we've seen it.Copy !req