Whose Line Is It Anyway? 5x4

Directed by

Malcolm Goodwin as Self • Gary Anthony Williams as Self

Guests: comedian Gary Anthony Williams, plus actor Malcolm Goodwin.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

Note: you must use specific languages with their specific pages/discord channels.

1. and welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway?

2. On tonight's show, straight up, Brad Sherwood.

3. On the rocks, Wayne Brady.

4. No salt please, Colin Mochrie.

5. And, hey, where's my cherry? Ryan Stiles!

6. I am your host, Drew Carey.

7. Come on down. Let's have some fun.

8. Hey, everybody.

9. Welcome to Whose Line Is It Anyway?

10. the show where everything is made up and the points don't matter.

11. That's right. The points are just like

12. anything your girlfriend tells you

13. while you're watching the game.

14. - Fact!

15. Let's get things started with a game called Change Letters.

16. This is for all four of you.

17. joined later by Ryan and Wayne.

18. Great game to play with your boss

19. - without telling him first.

20. - "L"? - "L."

21. You have to replace it with the letter "P."

22. Can't say "L." Have to say "P" instead of "L."

23. Scene is... And wouldn't it be fun at a board meeting?

24. Uh, scene is, a young guy, Brad,

25. and his girlfriend, Colin...

26. - Wait.

27. Wait. It gets better.

28. when her disapproving parents, Ryan and Wayne,

29. walk in unexpectedly.

30. Can't say "L," gotta say "P."

31. Oh!

32. I'm so filled with pust.

33. I... I pove you pike no other...

34. No other girp in the whole worpd.

35. I'm the puckiest girp in the worpd!

36. - Pock the door. - You bpoody Popita.

37. It's... It's not as bad as it pooks.

38. Wepp, wepp, wepp.

39. We peave you apone for one minute.

40. You pittle pady.

41. - Pisten to me. - You pisten!

42. Pisten to me.

43. She was pooking at something on my pip.

44. I hope you're on the pip.

45. - Are you on the pip?

46. Yes.

47. We'd pike you to peave.

48. We'd pike you to peave now.

49. But I pove him! I pove him.

50. - You pove him? - What do you know about pove?

51. I pove her!

52. Pisten, ppease.

53. Are you gonna epope?

54. - Maybe. - You're gonna epope?

55. - Will you marry me? - I wipp! I wipp!

56. Thank you.

57. Uh, a thousand points to app of you.

58. Especially Copin.

59. This is for Brad and Wayne with Laura Hall, Linda Taylor and Cece Worrall.

60. Whoo!

61. We have a very special guest for you to sing to tonight.

62. One of America's favorite TV moms,

63. from The Brady Bunch, Florence Henderson.

64. Florence Henderson.

65. - Hello. Nice to see you. - Hello.

66. Oh, and look at this.

67. - Momma. - My Brady. Oh.

68. - It's my momma. - It's my baby.

69. - How are you doing? - Yeah, good.

70. Thank you so much. Have a seat.

71. It all comes out now.

72. - The cutest one. - Oh, well, thank you.

73. Aw.

74. - Oh, hush.

75. Thanks, Florence. So nice to see you.

76. uh, and we've picked out disco music.

77. - Cool. - You sing a disco song for Florence Henderson.

78. - Okay. You ready, Mom?

79. Yeah.

80. - Thank you. - Thank you.

81. Florence Henderson, everybody.

82. Florence Henderson.

83. Florence Henderson.

84. Bye.

85. Hey, that was cool.

86. - Yeah. It was really cool.

87. - I feel like going backstage and asking her advice. I know.

88. I feel like going backstage and apologizing for the butcher joke.

89. Hey, let's move on to a game called If You Know What I Mean,

90. which is for Brad, Colin and Ryan.

91. Brad, Colin and Ryan.

92. Uh, it's a great game. Uh, in this one,

93. Brad and Colin are gonna act out the scene,

94. Ryan's gonna join them later.

95. Uh, they have to use as many obscure euphemisms

96. and cliches related to the setting as possible.

97. The scene is, Colin and Brad are two bakers

98. finishing the night shift at a bakery

99. when Ryan comes in to open up.

100. My dough's starting to rise, if you know what I mean.

101. You look like you want me to help butter your muffins,

102. if you know what I mean.

103. I'm gonna squeeze some icing, if you know what I mean.

104. Don't squeeze it too hard, if you know what I mean.

105. That's not very much icing.

106. I was slapping around on a couple of hot cross buns,

107. if you know what I mean.

108. You look like you've got one in the oven, if you know what I mean.

109. I like to knead the dough, if you know what I mean.

110. Look what I can do with the "dough-nuts."

111. - By the way, you're...

112. Let me say, uh...

113. I was staring at your buns, and they look warm and fresh, if you know what I mean.

114. I have no trouble with my yeast, if you know what I mean.

115. Looks like you've been freshly sugared, if you know what I mean.

116. - Mmm-hmm. - Uh-huh.

117. Well, my souffle has fallen, if you know what I mean.

118. I've never had that problem, if you know what I mean.

119. Well, maybe you better turn up the fire in the oven,

120. if you know what I mean.

121. Maybe you'd like to lick the spoon, if you know what I mean.

122. You didn't take a break during that.

123. What does "chunkier raisins" mean?

124. - That's an old Canadian saying. - Yeah.

125. Along with the showing of the donuts.

126. - That was my favorite. That was my favorite part.

127. Hey.

128. I've said that before. "Look what I can do with the donuts."

129. Yep.

130. - If you know what I mean.

131. - You've got Krispy Kreme, if you know what I mean. Yes, it's...

132. Always better when they're warm,

133. if you know what I'm saying.

134. We'll be right back on Whose Line right after this.

135. Don't go away.

136. Hey, welcome back.

137. Welcome back to Whose Line Is It Anyway?

138. the show where everything is made up

139. and the points don't matter.

140. That's right. The points are just like

141. a peephole in a nursing home.

142. Now, let's play a game called Dubbing.

143. This is for Brad, Ryan and Colin.

144. Plus our special guest. Florence Henderson, everybody.

145. Ah.

146. Florence, hello. Hello.

147. Now, Florence, this is a real easy game for you to play.

148. - Okay. - It's simpler than a Brady Bunch script.

149. Colin...

150. I don't think so. No.

151. However, she doesn't have to speak.

152. All her lines will be provided by Brad.

153. All you got to do is play the scene and move your mouth,

154. Brad's gonna provide all your words for you.

155. - Okay. The scene is,

156. hunky pool boy, Ryan...

157. Good job.

158. Hunky pool boy, Ryan, starts flirting with

159. saucy housewife, Florence.

160. Uh, as he persuades her to go skinny-dipping with him,

161. her hot-headed husband, Colin,

162. arrives home with a gift for her.

163. Colin comes in.

164. You got a lot of leaves built up in your pool here.

165. I hope you can clean my leaf trap,

166. if you know what I mean.

167. I'm sorry. I dozed off there.

168. Mrs. Philips, I can't lie to you.

169. I've been cleaning your pool for three years,

170. and I've fallen madly in love with you.

171. I can't believe it.

172. Well, believe it.

173. I don't think it'll ever work out between the two of us.

174. Your husband's never here. He's away on business all the time.

175. Why can't I come clean your pool more than once a week?

176. Oh, Marcus, Marcus, Marcus.

177. What the hell is going on here?

178. Oh! Oh!

179. I got you something.

180. I can't believe this!

181. Hey, Mr. Philips, there's nothing going on here.

182. - Tell him, Mrs. Philips. He's right.

183. Nothing's going on.

184. Oh, I've seen that look on your face

185. with the other hunky pool boys!

186. This was the least hunky I could find,

187. and still, you go for him!

188. Hey, that's...

189. That's not very nice. He's been working out.

190. Sure, he used to just be a stick with a nose,

191. but now, he's hunky.

192. Look...

193. If you two are gonna argue, I'm putting on my trunks and leaving.

194. Oh! How did my trunks fall off?

195. How did I not notice?

196. Look...

197. Mrs. Philips, you're gonna have to decide.

198. Are you gonna stay here with him

199. or come clean pools with me?

200. It really is your choice, Mrs. Philips.

201. Well, there's only one way to choose.

202. - Let's start with Marcus. - All right.

203. Come here, big boy.

204. Mmm!

205. Well...

206. Let me just say, I've fulfilled a fantasy

207. that I've had since my childhood.

208. We've done. But now, I must kiss my husband one...

209. Possibly one last time.

210. I'm only gonna use one lip.

211. I can...

212. I guess I'll... I'll just be on my way.

213. We're going to miss you.

214. I am going to miss you, Mrs. Philips.

215. My third nipple is hard.

216. Thank you so much. Thank you so much.

217. - You're such a good sport. - That was hilarious.

218. Florence Henderson, everybody.

219. Florence Henderson.

220. Thanks for coming here.

221. That just leaves Mrs. Cunningham now.

222. Oh, that was fantastic.

223. Ew.

224. - Ever.

225. No, ew, like, in a good way.

226. All right, we'll be right back with more on Whose Line right after this.

227. Don't go away.

228. Welcome back to Whose Line Is It Anyway?

229. the show where everything is made up and the points don't matter.

230. You know, during the commercial, we sold your car online.

231. with a game called Helping Hands.

232. This is for Ryan and Colin with special guest,

233. Mrs. Brady herself, Florence Henderson is here.

234. Florence Henderson to help us out.

235. - Ryan and Florence...

236. - Tuck that down in there, would you? - Put it on, Mrs. Brady.

237. - Put it on.

238. As I was just gonna say...

239. Uh, Ryan and Florence, you're gonna act out a scene,

240. but Ryan cannot use his own arms.

241. Instead, Colin is gonna provide the hands for Ryan.

242. over family dinner, Jan Brady...

243. - Yeah. - ... played by Ryan...

244. - Ah.

245. - about how to attract boys.

246. Talking to her mother about how to attract boys.

247. Take it away.

248. Mom, nothing's working. The braces didn't work.

249. Boys just don't find me cool.

250. Oh, honey, they will.

251. They will? They only like Marcia. Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!

252. Oh, honey, I know you're not too attractive,

253. - but...

254. There you go. You cry all the time.

255. - Stop it. - Oh!

256. - Why, Mom...

257. Mom, how could you do something like that?

258. You drive me crazy, you know that, you little twit?

259. - What?

260. Okay.

261. You made me all this food,

262. and then you treat me like this.

263. - Well... - I don't feel pretty.

264. How did that happen?

265. All right, the secret's out!

266. I know.

267. Yes, I'm a boy!

268. We tried to keep it... We tried to keep it a secret.

269. And I'm sick of pretending, Mom.

270. Well, you're just gonna have to do it a little longer.

271. I don't know what your father would say.

272. Well, I'm not pretending anymore.

273. Oh, these are real glasses.

274. - Mom? Mom? Oh, there you are. Yeah.

275. I'm not using these anymore.

276. I won't need these anymore.

277. - Oh. Well, I— - Look, they don't help much anyway.

278. I do. I think they help.

279. - You do? - I do.

280. Yes, put the other one in.

281. You got me this book, this "How to date" book, and this picture.

282. And this picture of David that I'm never gonna have.

283. Wait. But that's the wrong...

284. That's the wrong show, you...

285. - Oh.

286. What are you talking about "show," Mom?

287. - Well— - What are you talking about "show"?

288. - Oh, I— - Life is not a TV show!

289. Do you think we just live our life

290. for half an hour each week and it ends?

291. You can't pretend that you're ever gonna get

292. someone like David Cassidy, okay?

293. - All right. - Shirley Jones has him.

294. - Well, then forget it.

295. If I'm not saving myself for anyone, then I'm eating.

296. Here. Well, yes, have a little meatloaf.

297. Meatloaf for you, Mom?

298. Oh, well...

299. Okay.

300. You'll find out it tastes very good.

301. - I worked very hard to make it. - I can't wait to try some.

302. Actually, Alice made it.

303. - Mmm. - Perfect.

304. Mmm.

305. Mmm!

306. - Mmm! There we go.

307. - Ugh. - You know, Mom...

308. - Oh. Mom, usually— - Wait, wait, wait.

309. - Don't... Don't talk with your mouth full, Jan. - Okay.

310. - Thanks, Mom. - Okay.

311. - I had a little bit of my hair there. - Oh.

312. It was all the way down my throat.

313. Oh.

314. I— I will say that

315. this is the worst meatloaf that Alice ever made.

316. - It really is bad. - Ooh.

317. Maybe Slam's...

318. Sam... "Slam."

319. Never mind. I think I need something sweet right now.

320. And when I want sweet, I always go for ketchup.

321. Oh, here, darling. Here.

322. Oh! And you know how I like my pie.

323. - A little ketchup? - Plenty of ketchup on it.

324. Right.

325. Here you go.

326. Don't go away.

327. Should I go now? Should I leave?

328. - You're all right? - No.

329. Welcome back to Whose Line Is It Anyway?

330. Tonight's winner, Florence Henderson.

331. Florence Henderson is the winner tonight.

332. So, in honor of you,

333. we're gonna have everybody read the credits

334. as members of The Brady Bunch

335. snitching on each other to their mom.

336. Thanks for watching, everybody. Good night.

337. Mom. Mom, Drew Carey snuck into the room.

338. - What's it, Tiger?

339. Tiger. Oh, my goodness.

340. Mrs. Brady, I'm not gonna tell you how to raise your family.

341. - Where do you want this meat? - Put it in the refrigerator.

342. - Refrigerator. - Okay. Yeah, yeah.

343. Steven Blum broke Bobby's nose.

344. - Oh, really? - Yeah.

345. - Poor Bobby. - He broke that.

346. What happened to your nose?

347. Hey, where's your Tiki necklace?