Whose Line Is It Anyway? 3x6

Directed by

Willie Robertson as Self • Jeff Bryan Davis as Self

Reality-TV star Willie Robertson ("Duck Dynasty"); guest comic Jeff Davis.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

Note: you must use specific languages with their specific pages/discord channels.

1. GOOD EVENING, EVERYBODY,

2. AND WELCOME TO "WHOSE LINE IS IT AWAY?"

3. ON TONIGHT'S SHOW — GREAT OUTSIDE SPEED — BRAD SHERWOOD,

4. LIKES TO GO DEEP — WAYNE BRADY,

5. HE'S TOUGH TO BRING DOWN — COLIN MOCHRIE,

6. AND HE CAN'T TAKE ANOTHER HIT TO THE HEAD — RYAN STILES,

7. AND I'M YOUR HOST — DREW CAREY.

8. COME ON DOWN. LET'S HAVE SOME FUN.

9. HELLO.

10. WHOO!

11. WELCOME TO "WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY?"

12. THE SHOW WHERE EVERYTHING IS MADE UP

13. AND THE POINTS DON'T MATTER. THAT'S RIGHT.

14. THE POINTS ARE JUST LIKE

15. THE ACTO' UNIONS TO TIGER WOODS.

16. LET'S GET THE SHOW STARTED

17. WITH A GAME CALLED "LET'S MAKE A DATE."

18. THIS IS FOR ALL OF YOU.

19. RYAN, COLIN, AND WAYNE

20. ARE CONTESTANTS ON A DATING-TYPE SHOW.

21. THEY'RE HOPING TO BE PICKED BY BRAD,

22. WHO'S GOING TO QUESTION THEM ABOUT THEIR SUITABILITY.

23. WE'VE GIVEN EACH OF THEM A STRANGE QUIRK OR IDENTITY.

24. BRAD HAS TO GUESS WHO THEY ARE WHILE HE QUESTIONS THEM,

25. SO WHENEVER YOU'RE READY, BRAD, TAKE IT AWAY.

26. BACHELOR NUMBER ONE, I LOVE ROMANCE.

27. IF YOU AND I WERE IN A ROMANCE NOVEL,

28. DESCRIBE THE OPENING SCENE.

29. YOU THINK YOU'RE SO PRETTY, DO YOU?

30. I WOULDN'T GO ON A DATE WITH YOU

31. IF YOU WERE THE LAST WOMAN IN OZ.

32. HA HA HA!

33. HA HA HA!

34. STRANGE.

35. BACHELOR NUMBER TWO,

36. IF YOU WOULD SEDUCE ME WITH FOOD,

37. WHAT WOULD YOU USE AND HOW?

38. I'LL GET BACK TO YOU.

39. HA HA HA!

40. I DID IT.

41. BEEF.

42. THAT SEEMED DIRTY.

43. BACHELOR NUMBER THREE,

44. I LOVE PRESENTS.

45. WHAT KIND OF PRESENT WOULD YOU BUY ME, HMM?

46. WELL, IF I COULD BUY YOU A PRESENT,

47. I WOULD PROBABLY...

48. COULD YOU REPEAT THE QUESTION, PLEASE?

49. YOU HAVE KISSABLE LIPS, BACHELOR NUMBER THREE.

50. THANK YOU.

51. BACHELOR NUMBER ONE —

52. POOF!

53. HA HA HA!

54. WRITE ME A POEM NOW. NOW.

55. LITTLE DATER COME FROM THE WEST,

56. I AM YOUR OPPONENT, AND I'LL BE THE BEST.

57. IF YOU DON'T GIVE ME WHAT I WANT,

58. YOU'LL BE SINGING THE BLUES,

59. I'LL BEAT YOUR ASS AND TAKE YOUR RED SHOES.

60. HA HA HA!

61. HA HA HA!

62. I CAN'T IMAGINE WHO YOU WOULD BE.

63. BACHELOR NUMBER TWO...

64. YEAH.

65. SAME QUESTION.

66. ALL RIGHT, I — OH, NO!

67. OH, HANG ON! I'LL SAVE YOU!

68. I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU'RE GOING TO DO IT.

69. GUESS WHO THEY ARE.

70. ALL RIGHT, LET'S SEE.

71. WAYNE WAS EITHER THE WICKED WITCH OF THE WEST

72. OR BARBARA BUSH.

73. WICKED WITCH OF THE WEST, COMMIE. YES.

74. AND HER...

75. AND HER WHAT?

76. OH, FLYING MONKEYS.

77. OH, HE WAS TWO PEOPLE. THAT'S VERY EXCITING.

78. BACHELOR NUMBER TWO WAS A DRUNK FIREMAN.

79. YES.

80. AND AT FIRST I THOUGHT RYAN WAS ED SULLIVAN,

81. BUT I THINK HE WAS A FISH.

82. A GOLDFISH.

83. A KISSING FISH.

84. GOOD JOB.

85. 1,000 POINTS TO EVERYBODY.

86. WHY DO WE EVEN MAKE YOU GUESS AT THE END OF THAT GAME?

87. I DON'T KNOW.

88. IT'S LIKE THERE'S SOMETHING AT STAKE.

89. LET'S MOVE ON TO A GAME CALLED "DUET."

90. THIS IS FOR BRAD AND WAYNE

91. WITH THE HELP OF LAURA HALL, LINDA TAYLOR,

92. AND CANDY GIRARD ON VIOLIN.

93. HELLO. WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

94. KIM.

95. KIM, WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING, KIM?

96. I SELL LIGHT BULBS.

97. A LOT OF MONEY IN THAT, IS THERE?

98. OH, YEAH.

99. OKAY, COME ON DOWN HERE, KIM, AND SAY HI TO BRAD AND WAYNE.

100. SO, YOU SELL LIGHT BULBS, HUH?

101. NOT DOOR-TO-DOOR, RIGHT?

102. NO.

103. HI, I'M A LIGHT BULB SALESMAN.

104. PORCH LIGHT SEEMS TO BE OUT.

105. OKAY, YOU'RE GOING TO SING A SONG TO KIM,

106. THE LIGHT BULB SALESLADY,

107. BUT I'D LIKE YOU TO DO IT IN THE STYLE —

108. IT SAYS HERE, "AS A JEWISH WEDDING."

109. OH, GOOD, 'CAUSE I'VE BEEN TO A LOT.

110. YEAH.

111. YOU AND SAMMY NEVER HUNG OUT OR ANYTHING?

112. OKAY, UH, THIS IS JUST ABOUT THE GIRL.

113. SHE'S THE BRIDE,

114. SO GO AHEAD AND SING AWAY.

115. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE "WHOSE LINE"

116. RIGHT AFTER THIS.

117. DON'T GO AWAY.

118. WELCOME BACK TO "WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY?"

119. THE SHOW WHERE EVERYTHING IS MADE UP

120. AND THE POINTS DON'T MATTER.

121. LET ME TAKE THIS MOMENT TO GIVE YOU A PLUG

122. FOR WAYNE, COLIN, AND RYAN'S NEXT MOVIE, AND BRAD.

123. THEY ALL HAVE A MOVIE COMING OUT.

124. IT'S A COMBINATION OF "COYOTE UGLY,"

125. "SCARY MOVIE," AND THE "X-MEN."

126. IT'S CALLED "IT'S SCARY HOW UGLY THOSE MEN ARE."

127. LET'S GO TO A GAME CALLED "INFOMERCIAL."

128. THIS IS FOR RYAN AND COLIN.

129. YOU'RE GOING TO BE TWO GUYS DOING AN INFOMERCIAL

130. ABOUT A NEW MIRACLE PRODUCT,

131. AND YOU'RE GOING TO USE ITEMS IN THAT BOX

132. TO HELP SELL THE MIRACLE PRODUCT.

133. I NEED A SUGGESTION OF A PRODUCT IN AN INFOMERCIAL

134. FOR SELF-IMPROVEMENT OR BEAUTY ENHANCEMENT.

135. CELLULITE CREAM.

136. CELLULITE CREAM.

137. LET'S HEAR ABOUT THIS NEW CELLULITE CREAM.

138. TAKE IT AWAY.

139. GOOD EVENING. IT'S 12:00 ON A SATURDAY

140. AND THERE'S NOTHING ELSE TO WATCH,

141. SO IT'S TIME TO SHOP.

142. DO YOU HAVE CELLULITE?

143. I DON'T, BUT I KNOW PLENTY OF PEOPLE WHO DO.

144. YOU DON'T?

145. HEY, YOU STOP IT, RYAN.

146. EVERYONE'S GOT CELLULOID, EVEN A GUY LIKE ME.

147. CELLULOID? THAT'S FILM.

148. THAT'S WHAT I —

149. CELLULITE — ON THE BACK OF THE LEGS.

150. CELLULITE.

151. OH, RIGHT.

152. YEAH, CELLULITE.

153. WELL, IT IS UNSIGHTLY, BUT WE HAVE GOT PRODUCTS

154. THAT WILL GET RID OF IT IN MONTHS FLAT.

155. EXACTLY RIGHT, COLIN.

156. YOU KNOW, WE HAVE SO MANY PRODUCTS —

157. WELL, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ONE OF THEM RIGHT NOW, COL.

158. A SIMPLE BAG OF GREEN PEAS.

159. WHY, RYAN,

160. HOW COULD THAT POSSIBLY FIGHT THE WAR AGAINST CELLULITE?

161. WELL, LET ME TELL YOU.

162. YOU KNOW, CELLULOID IS CAUSED —

163. CELLULITE.

164. CELLULITE IS CAUSED BY EATING TOO MUCH, OF COURSE.

165. OF COURSE.

166. OF COURSE.

167. WE FIND IF YOU EAT THE FOODS INSIDE THE BAG

168. WITHOUT TAKING THEM OUT,

169. YOU DON'T GET THE NUTRITION OR THE FAT FROM THE FOOD.

170. IT SOUNDS CRAZY, BUT IT WORKS!

171. IT WORKS!

172. WHY, WHAT CAN THIS DO?

173. GEE, YOU KNOW, IT LOOKS LIKE SOME SORT OF WEIRD,

174. OH, I DON'T KNOW, HOME BATTING CAGE

175. OR SOME SORT OF FISH —

176. NO, YOU SILLY GOOSE.

177. WHAT IS IT?

178. IT'S A CELLULITE FIGHTER.

179. WHAT?

180. YOU STICK THIS UP AGAINST THE BACK OF YOUR THIGH.

181. GET A FRIEND TO PUSH IT REALLY HARD.

182. THE CELLULITE COMES OUT, AND YOU JUST IRON IT AWAY.

183. WOW.

184. THAT'S RIGHT! YOU IRON IT AWAY!

185. BOY, I BET STUFF LIKE THIS MUST BE EXPENSIVE.

186. ARE YOU KIDDING?

187. THIS COSTS NEXT TO NOTHING, BUT IT'S ACTUALLY $25.94.

188. THAT IS NEXT TO NOTHING, COL.

189. WHAT IS THIS, I WONDER?

190. WHERE DO YOU GET CELLULOID THE MOST, COL?

191. WELL, I GET CELLULOID ELSEWHERE.

192. CELLULITE I GET RIT AROUND MY —

193. YOUR WHAT? YOUR WHAT?

194. AROUND MY —

195. THAT'S ABOUT THAT SIZE. ABOUT — OH!

196. SEE, COL, WHAT YOU DO

197. IS YOU PUT THIS ON ONE OF THE CHEEKS OF YOUR BUM.

198. NOW, THERE'S A SPECIAL NOZZLE HERE

199. WHERE YOU CAN GET A CLOSE FRIEND...

200. A REALLY CLOSE FRIEND.

201. TO BLOW...

202. PUSHING THE CELLULOID AWAY —

203. PUSHING IT AWAY — PUSHING IT AWAY FOREVER,

204. AND I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT FILM.

205. ARE YOU GETTING THAT BAD ACT TOGETHER AGAIN?

206. YES, I AM.

207. WHAT DOES THAT LOOK LIKE TO YOU?

208. WHY, THAT LOOKS LIKE SOME SORT OF FURNITURE POLISH

209. WITH THE BRAND NAME ERASED.

210. IT IS. I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S DOING IN THERE.

211. UH-OH.

212. FOR REALLY BAD CASES.

213. THIS IS NOT FOR EVERYONE.

214. THESE ARE FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE A BAD CASE OF...

215. CELLULITE.

216. WHAT HAPPENS IS YOU ATTACH THIS TO THE BOTTOM.

217. SHALL I ATTACH IT FOR YOU, COLIN?

218. NO, IT'S ALL RIGHT. I'LL JUST HOLD IT.

219. YOU STICK THE REST OF THE CELLULITE IN THERE,

220. AND IT CARRIES IT.

221. AS YOU WALK,

222. YOUR WALKING ACTUALLY PULLS THE CELLULITE

223. IN THROUGH THE BACK OF YOUR THIGHS

224. OUT TO YOUR KNEES WHERE WRINKLES DON'T MATTER.

225. YOU KNOW WHAT IS SO GREAT ABOUT ALL THIS STUFF, COLIN?

226. WHAT?

227. IF NONE OF THIS WORKS — AND IT WILL —

228. BUT IF NONE OF IT WORKS,

229. YOU CAN TAKE THE BOX WE SHIP THIS STUFF IN —

230. JUST WALK AROUND TOWN LIKE THIS.

231. CELLULOID, AS YOU ALL KNOW, IS, UH, FAT HEMORRHOIDS.

232. CELLULOID. YOU TALKING ABOUT CELLULOID?

233. YEAH, YEAH.

234. LET'S GO ON TO A GAME CALLED "SCENES CUT FROM A MOVIE."

235. THIS IS FOR ALL FOUR OF YOU.

236. NOW, WHAT I NEED FROM THE AUDIENCE

237. IS NAMES OF YOUR FAVORITE FAMOUS MOVIES.

238. "SHOWGIRLS, "PULP FICTION"...

239. "SAVING PRIVATE RYAN"...

240. "PSYCHO"...

241. "BRAVEHEART."

242. OH, "CASABLANCA," "CADDYSHACK."

243. "FORREST GUMP."

244. OKAY, WE GOT ENOUGH.

245. WE'VE DISCOVERED SCENESERE CUT

246. FROM THESE DIFFERENT FAMOUS MOVIES,

247. AND OUR PERFORMERS HERE

248. ARE GOING TO ACT THEM OUT FOR YOU,

249. SHOW YOU WHAT YOU MISSED,

250. STARTING WITH THE SCENE THAT WAS CUT FROM "PSYCHO."

251. "SHOWGIRLS."

252. YOU READY?

253. "PULP FICTION."

254. KNOW WHAT THEY CALL A BURRITO IN CHINA?

255. NO.

256. OKAY, OKAY, WHAT DO THEY, UH...

257. YOU KNOW THE FUNNY THING?

258. THAT IS WHAT THEY CALL A BURRITO IN CHINA.

259. UH, "GUMP" —

260. "FORREST GUMP."

261. LIFE IS KIND OF LIKE A BAG

262. WITH A BUNCH OF BUGS IN IT —

263. YOU OPEN IT,

264. AND IT ALL JUST SPREADS OUT ALL OVER THE FLOOR.

265. COME ON, MAN.

266. I'M GOING TO BEAT YOUR ASS.

267. "SAVING PRIVATE RYAN" — ANOTHER TOM HANKS FILM.

268. I DON'T WANT TO, PLEASE.

269. THE BATHROOM IS FREE NOW.

270. "CADDYSHACK."

271. AAH!

272. "BRAVEHEART."

273. ALL RIGHT, MEN,

274. WE'RE GOING INTO BATTLE TOMORROW.

275. AYE, AYE, AYE.

276. AYE.

277. BEFORE WE DO,

278. I THINK WE SHOULD ALL TAKE A SHOWER.

279. THAT WOULD BE GREAT.

280. WE'VE SET UP SOME SHOWER FAUCETS

281. RIGHT HERE ON THE BATTLEFIELD.

282. WHO WANTS TO BE FIRST?

283. UH, I DON'T WANT MY FREEDOM.

284. 1,000 POINTS TO COLIN

285. FOR SOUNDING LIKE THE WOMAN FROM "CHICKEN RUN"

286. INSTEAD OF FROM "BRAVEHEART."

287. DO THAT AGAIN. THAT WAS PRETTY FUNNY.

288. I DON'T WANT MY FREEDOM.

289. LET'S MOVE ON

290. TO A GAME CALLED "IRISH DRINKING SONG" —

291. "IRISH DRINKING SONG,"

292. WITH THE HELP OF LAURA HALL AND CANDY GIRARD —

293. CANDY GIRARD.

294. NOW, AUDIENCE,

295. IF SOMETHING MIGHT HAPPEN TO YOU

296. THAT YOU WOULD WANT TO KEEP SECRET,

297. WHAT WOULD THAT SOMETHING BE?

298. SLEPT WITH AN UGLY WOMAN.

299. LET'S DO THE "SLEPT WITH AN UGLY WOMAN"

300. IRISH DRINKING SONG.

301. NOW THESE GUYS ARE GOING TO MAKE UP THIS SONG FOR YOU

302. ONE LINE AT A TIME,

303. SO TAKE IT AWAY.

304. OKAY, GREAT.

305. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE "WHOSE LINE"

306. RIGHT AFTER THIS. DON'T GO ANYWHERE.

307. HEY, WELCOME BACK TO "WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY?"

308. TONIGHT'S WINNER — COLIN MOCHRIE.

309. COLIN MOCHRIE IS THE WINNER, AND AS PROMISED,

310. THE WINNER JUST GETS TO LAY AROUND ON H BUTT

311. LIKE I DO DURING THE SHOW.

312. THE REST OF US ARE GOING TO WORK FOR YOU.

313. WE'RE GOING TO DO A GAME CALLED "FOREIGN FILM DUB."

314. GIVE US A LANGUAGE.

315. FRENCH.

316. WAYNE AND I ARE GOING TO PRETEND TO SPEAK FRENCH.

317. RYAN IS GOING TO TRANSLATE FOR ME.

318. BRAD IS GOING TO TRANSLATE FOR WAYNE,

319. AND IF YOU'RE A FRENCH ACTION FILM DIRECTOR,

320. WHAT WOULD THE NAME OF YOUR FRENCH ACTION FILM BE?

321. THE NAME OF THE FRENCH ACTION MOVIE IS "UH-HUH"

322. STARRING WAYNE AND ME. TAKE IT AWAY.

323. KEEP A LOOKOUT FOR THE COPS.

324. I WILL TRY TO OPEN THE SAFE,

325. AND THEN WE WILL WATCH "HOGAN'S HEROES."

326. BUT IT'S OCTOBER. IT'S TIME FOR ME TO SHOWER.

327. WAIT ONE MORE MONTH FOR YOUR SHOWER.

328. WE MUST BREAK INTO THE SAFE AND GET A VALUABLE BOOK.

329. NO, NO, NO, NO.

330. I CAN'T MOVE. I'VE HAD TOO MANY CROISSANTS.

331. OH, NO,

332. I'VE ACCIDENTALLY SET OFF THE DO "THE HUSTLE" ALARM.

333. NO!

334. NO, NO.

335. I CANNOT DO THAT DANCE WITH MY CLOTHES ON.

336. I MUST TAKE THEM OFF NOW.

337. OKAY.

338. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE "WHOSE LINE" RIGHT AFTER THIS.

339. WELCOME BACK, FOLKS.

340. TONIGHT WE'RE GOING TO HAVE EVERYBODY READ THE CREDITS.

341. ALL YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO READ THE CREDITS FOR US

342. LIKE THE WICKED WITCHES OF THE WEST.

343. THANKS FOR WATCHING.

344. WE'LL SEE YOU NEXT TIME ON "WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY?"

345. DAN PATTERSON.

346. TOM PARK.

347. POOF!

348. POOF TO U!

349. POOF!

350. HA HA HA!

351. AAH!

352. HA HA HA!

353. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

354. CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY ABC, INC. AND WARNER BROS. INC.