Whose Line Is It Anyway? 2x20

Directed by

Matt Barnes as Self • Gary Anthony Williams as Self

Professional basketball player Matt Barnes; comic Gary Anthony Williams.

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!req Whose Line Is It Anyway? 2x20 [02:32]
!req Whose Line Is It Anyway? 2x20 [Whose Line Is It Anyway? 2x20]
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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

Note: you must use specific languages with their specific pages/discord channels.

1. GOOD EVENING, EVERYBODY, AND WELCOME TO...

2. ON TONIGHT'S SHOW —

3. START ME UP... WAYNE BRADY,

4. HONKY-TONK WOMAN... KATHY GREENWOOD,

5. GIVE ME SHELTER... COLIN MOCHRIE,

6. AND HERE COMES YOUR 19th NERVOUS BREAKDOWN...

7. RYAN STILES.

8. I'M YOUR HOST DREW CAREY. COME ON, LET'S HAVE SOME FUN.

9. OH, MAN.

10. HELLO.

11. GOOD EVENING. WELCOME TO "WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY?"

12. THE SHOW WHERE EVERYTHING'S MADE UP

13. AND THE POINTS DON'T MATTER.

14. THAT'S RIGHT, POINTS ARE STUPID.

15. THE POINTS DON'T MEAN A THING.

16. IT'S LIKE THE CENSOR ON THE "DONNY AND MARIE SHOW."

17. YOU DON'T REALLY NEED IT, BUT WE GOT IT.

18. IF YOU NEVER SAW THE SHOW BEFORE,

19. THESE GUYS ARE GOING TO MAKE EVERYTHING UP

20. OFF THE TOP OF THEIR HEADS.

21. I GIVE THEM POINTS, I DON'T KNOW WHY.

22. JUST A LITTLE THING TO TIE THE SHOW TOGETHER.

23. THEN BRINGING A NEW MEANING TO THE WORD "WINNER,"

24. AT THE END OF THE SHOW,

25. THE WINNER GETS TO DO SOMETHING SPECIAL WITH ME.

26. THE, UH, THAT'S RIGHT.

27. PLEASE, DON'T LET ME BE THE WINNER.

28. PLEASE, DON'T LET ME BE THE WINNER.

29. THE LOSER HAS TO DRIVE THE GOAT BACK TO THE FARM.

30. SO, IF YOU'RE READY, LET'S GET THE SHOW STARTED.

31. WE'RE GOING TO START WITH A GAME CALLED "QUESTIONS ONLY."

32. KATHY AND WAYNE, YOU'RE GOING TO START OUT.

33. THEY CAN ONLY HAVE THEIR CONVERSATION

34. SPEAKING IN QUESTIONS.

35. THIS MAKES A GREAT PARTY GAME

36. IF YOU'RE AT A PARTY WITH NO CHICKS OR BOOZE.

37. THEY CAN ONLY USE QUESTIONS. I'LL BUZZ THEM OUT —

38. A LITTLE CONTEST TO SEE WHO CAN STAY OUT THE LONGEST.

39. THE SCENE IS, IT'S A WEDDING AT A NUDIST COLONY,

40. A WEDDING AT A NUDIST COLONY.

41. SO, QUESTIONS ONLY, GO AHEAD.

42. ARE YOU A FRIEND OF THE BRIDE OR GROOM?

43. DOES THIS LOOK GOOD?

44. MY GOODNESS, YOU HAVE TO ASK?

45. HEY, AFTER THEY GET MARRIED, YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED?

46. YOU'RE ASKING ME TO MARRY YOU?

47. HEY, STAND BACK, PLEASE... WOULD YOU?

48. CAN YOU HELP ME WITH MY TIE?

49. OH.

50. WELL, IF THIS IS WHERE YOU WANT TO PUT IT.

51. OH.

52. GUESS WHO'S THE BEST MAN.

53. CAN I HAVE THREE GUESSES?

54. WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?

55. ANY IDEA HOW YOU CAN KEEP THESE PIGEONS OFF HERE?

56. CAN YOU LOOK LESS LIKE A WORM?

57. WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

58. WHAT DO YOU THINK IT MEANS?

59. WERE YOU INVITED HERE?

60. WHO CAN SAY?

61. LISTEN, HAVE YOU SEEN THE BRIDE?

62. WHAT DOES SHE LOOK LIKE?

63. SHE LOOKS LIKE SHE'S RUN AWAY.

64. QUESTIONS ONLY, WE'RE PLAYING.

65. DOES SHE LOOK LIKE SHE'S RUN AWAY?

66. WHO?

67. ISN'T IT OBVIOUS I'M TALKING ABOUT THE BRIDE?

68. HOW CAN YOU TELL HER APART FROM THE OTHER WOMEN?

69. AREN'T Y THE MINISTER?

70. ISN'T THE COLLAR A DEAD GIVEAWAY?

71. WHY JUST A COLLAR?

72. HAVE YOU SEEN MY PIGEON?

73. OKAY, THAT'S IT. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

74. THAT WAS WONDERFUL. 1,000 POINTS APIECE

75. FOR WHATEVER YOU JUST DID RIGHT THERE.

76. WHOO!

77. NOW LET'S GO ON TO A GAME CALLED "SOUND EFFECTS."

78. IT'S FOR COLIN AND RYAN.

79. COLIN'S GOING TO IMPROVISE A SCENE.

80. HE HAS TO RESPOND TO SOUND EFFECTS MADE BY RYAN.

81. WE GOT HIM HIS OWN MICROPHONE BECAUSE HE SPITS.

82. THE SCENE IS IN THE WILD WEST,

83. THOUGH NEW SHERIFF COLIN...

84. I LIKE HOW —

85. ANOTHER SHERIFF?

86. I LIKE HOW THEY GIVE YOU THE TITLES.

87. TOUGH NEW SHERIFF COLIN

88. ON AN URGENT MISSION TO CLEAN UP THE TOWN

89. ARRIVES AT THE SALOON.

90. YOU'RE A SHERIFF COMING TO CLEAN UP THE TOWN.

91. YOU'RE GOING TO DO THE SOUND EFFECTS.

92. OW! OHH!

93. OHH!

94. OHH!

95. OHH!

96. [ Imitates man HEY, WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA?

97. EWW! EWW! EWW! EWW!

98. UHH! UHH! UHH!

99. UHH! UHH! UHH! UHH!

100. OW!

101. YOU KNOW, I'VE SEEN LESS GERMS

102. ON THE POLE AT THE STRIP CLUB.

103. THAT'S WHY I USE PROTECTION ON THE MIKE.

104. MAN, THIS THING IS SOAKED.

105. IF I HAD A NICKEL FOR EVERY TIME I SAID THAT...

106. YOU'D HAVE A DIME.

107. I'HAVE A DIME.

108. LET'S MOVE ON TO A GAME CALLED "PROPS."

109. IT'S FOR RYAN AND KATHY, AND COLIN AND WAYNE.

110. RYAN AND KATHY, COME GET YOUR PROP.

111. AND, UH, OH, KEEP LAUGHING. HERE'S YOUR PROP.

112. WHAT THEY HAVE TO DO

113. IS THEY HAVE TO GO BACK AND FORTH

114. AND MAKE UP FUNNY THINGS TO DO WITH THEIR PROPS.

115. RYAN AND KATHY, WHY DON'T YOU START?

116. WE'RE NUMBER FOUR! WE'RE NUMBER FOUR!

117. GOT A KLEENEX?

118. KATHY, YOU'RE GETTING CARRIED AWAY

119. WITH THIS IMPLANT THING.

120. MR. SCROOGE.

121. WHAT DO YOU MEAN, PUNK'S DEAD?

122. YOU ORDERED SOME GREEN "T"?

123. ACK ACK ACK ACK ACK.

124. NO MORE WAR! NO MORE WAR! NO —

125. OHH, RICOLA!

126. GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE!

127. GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE!

128. AND IT LOOKS LIKE THE HOLLYWEED FREEWAY

129. IS ALL, UH, JAMMED UP.

130. HOLLYWOOD.

131. HOLLYWOOD. YEAH, YEAH, WHATEVER.

132. HEY — OH, SORRY. I'M ALL HANDS.

133. NEXT TIME GET A SMALLER BOTTLE OF WINE.

134. I DON'T KNOW WHY TWO OF US

135. HAVE TO BE ON THE PAPER ROUTE.

136. WE'RE GOING TO SEE A COMMERCIAL.

137. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE "WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY?"

138. WELCOME BACK TO "WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY?"

139. THE SHOW WHERE EVERYTHING IS MADE UP,

140. AND THE POINTS DON'T MATTER, LIKE PICKUP LINES TO BRAD PITT.

141. UH, I MEAN, MAYBE HE COULD USE THEM,

142. BUT YOU DON'T REALLY NEED TO.

143. OKAY, MOVING ON. WE'RE GOING TO A GAME CALLED "NEWS FLASH."

144. THIS IS FOR KATHY, RYAN, AND COLIN.

145. KATHY AND RYAN, YOU'RE TWO NEWS ANCHORS IN A STUDIO.

146. COLIN, YOU'RE GOING TO BE THE ROVING FIELD REPORTER

147. COVERING THE BREAKING NEWS STORY.

148. COLIN IS IN FRONT OF A GREEN SCREEN.

149. IT'S JUST LIKE THEY DO WITH YOUR TELEVISION WEATHER

150. ON YOUR LOCAL NEWS.

151. WE PROJECT A THING ON THE GREEN SCREEN,

152. BUT ALL COLIN SEES IS THIS BIG THING OF GREEN.

153. HE TURNS AROUND, ALL HE'S GOING TO SEE IS GREEN.

154. BUT WE SEE WHAT HE'S LOOKING AT ON TV.

155. HE HAS TO TRY TO GUESS WHAT'S BEHIND HIM.

156. HE CAN'T SEE THE MONITORS.

157. KATHY AND RYAN ARE GOING TO GIVE HINTS TO HIM.

158. COLIN, KATHY, RYAN,

159. WHENEVER YOU GUYS ARE READY, START.

160. WAS IT ANOTHER GIRL AND A MAN OR TWO MEN?

161. OH, WE'RE ON THE AIR.

162. WE INTERRUPT THIS PROGM FOR A SPECIAL NEWS BULLETIN.

163. WE TAKE YOU OUT IN THE FIELD.

164. WHO'S OUR REPORTER OUT THERE TODAY, KATHY?

165. TODAY IT'S AWARD-WINNING WAR CORRESPONDENT COLIN MOCHRIE.

166. COLIN, HOW DID YOU FIND YOURSELF IN THIS SITUATION?

167. UH, MY BUS TOOK A WRONG TURN SOMEWHERE.

168. IT'S VERY HARD FOR ME TO KEEP MY PROFESSIONALISM.

169. I'M VERY, VERY FRIGHTENED.

170. I DON'T BLAME YOU.

171. AS YOU CAN HEAR, THERE'S LOTS OF STUFF GOING ON

172. THAT'S NOT MEETING WITH POPULAR DEMAND.

173. COLIN, IT DOES —

174. COLIN, IT DOES NOT LOOK GOOD.

175. HOW DID THIS WHOLE THING START?

176. WELL, IT ALL STARTED WITH A BAD CONCERT REVIEW,

177. AND IT JUST DEGENERATED INTO THIS.

178. I AM SHOCKED!

179. I AM ALMOST DISGUSTED BY WHAT I AM LOOKING AT.

180. I THINK WE CAN ALL SAY THE SAME THING.

181. COLIN, I CAN BARELY EVEN TALK TO YOU.

182. I MEAN, IT'S — IT'S A ROTTEN SITUATION.

183. OH, IT CERTAINLY IS. I AM —

184. WELL, LOOK.

185. I MEAN, I'M SO DISGUSTED,

186. I FEEL LIKE WALKING AWAY FROM THIS ENTIRE THING.

187. UH, COLIN, UH, HA HA! OHH!

188. LET ME SAY FIRST

189. THAT WE'RE ALL DISGUSTED HERE IN THE STUDIO

190. BY WHAT WE'RE SEEING.

191. OHH! OHH!

192. OHH! OHH!

193. OH, MY!

194. MY GOSH!

195. WELL, LOOK AT THE FESTIVE COLORS.

196. IT IS PRETTY EXCITING.

197. I HEAR THERE'S GOING TO BE DRINKS LATER.

198. OH, IT SEEMS — OHH! OHH!

199. ARE YOU, INDEED?

200. COLIN, I'D LIKE TO ASK YOU ANOTHER QUESTION,

201. BUT I'M AFRAID IF I OPEN MY MOUTH I MIGHT VOMIT.

202. YOU MIND IF I EAT?

203. I DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO GET, UH —

204. TAKE A GUESS WHERE YOU'RE STANDING.

205. IN A BIG GROUP OF MAGGOTS?

206. YES!

207. AND YOU CAN'T SHOW PEOPLE SMOKING ON TV,

208. BUT YOU CAN SHOW THAT.

209. AY, YI, YI.

210. SO, UH, ONE TRILLION POINTS.

211. ONE TRILLION POINTS.

212. EAT MY DUST, REGIS!

213. EAT MY DUST!

214. NOW WE'RE GOING TO PLAY

215. A GREAT GAME CALLED "GREATEST HITS."

216. THIS IS FOR RYAN, COLIN, AND WAYNE,

217. WITH LAURA, LINDA, AND C.C.

218. COLIN AND RYAN ARE GOING TO BE TWO TV COMMERCIAL GUYS.

219. THEY'RE GOING TO BE TALKING ABOUT

220. THE LATEST COMPILATION ALBUM THEY'RE TRYING TO SELL.

221. THEY'RE GOING TO MAKE UP THE NAMES AND STYLE.

222. WAYNE'S GOING TO TRY TO SING WHATEVER THEY SAY.

223. WHAT WE NEED FROM THE AUDIENCE

224. IS SOMETHING YOU'D LOOK TO FIND IN THE YELLOW PAGES.

225. DOG GROOMER — UH, ATTORNEY.

226. "SONGS OF THE ATTORNEY."

227. LET'S HEAR THE NEW HIT —

228. THE HIT ALBUM "SONGS OF THE ATTORNEY."

229. GOOD LUCK.

230. HI. WE'LL SOON RETURN YOU

231. TO THE DYSLEXIC THEATER PRODUCTION

232. OF "BITTY BITTY CHANG CHANG"

233. IN JUST A SECOND,

234. BUT FIRST WE HAVE A SPECIAL OFFER FOR YOU.

235. MY ATTORNEY GOT ME A MILLION DOLLARS.

236. NO, HE DIDN'T,

237. BUT YOU'LL FEEL LIKE A MILLION DOLLARS

238. WHEN YOU BUY OUR NEW 3-CD SET

239. ALL ABOUT THE ATTORNEY.

240. 52 SONGS ON 3 CDs, HUH?

241. WHY, THAT DIVIDES EVENLY, DOESN'T IT?

242. IT SURE DOES.

243. WHEN I WAS A YOUNG BOY GROWING UP IN A KIBBUTZ,

244. MY GRANDMOTHER USED TO SING ME

245. YIDDISH FOLK SONGS ABOUT ATTORNS.

246. REALLY?

247. YES. AND THE WORDS STILL RING IN MY HEAD,

248. AS THOUGH IT WERE 20 YEARS AGO.

249. AND ONE OF MY FAVORITES OF ALL TIME WAS...

250. "SUE HIM, SUE HIM BIG."

251. CALL ME SOMETIME.

252. SUDDENLY, I FEEL LIKE HAVING A MATZO.

253. OH, I MISS MY BOOBY.

254. YOU KNOW, THIS CD SET

255. IS SELLING SO GOOD IN THE WEST AND UP NORTH,

256. BUT WE'RE TRYING TO GET OUR SOUTHERN FRIENDS

257. TO BUY THIS, TOO.

258. SO WE'RE GOING TO TALK SLOWER,

259. AND WE'VE GOT A SONG ON THIS CD SET FOR YOU,

260. THAT GREAT JUG BAND HIT —

261. "SEQUESTER THIS."

262. MY JUG BROKE.

263. JUST FLIP DISC ONE OVER,

264. YOU GET THE OTHER HALF OF THAT SONG.

265. THAT'S RIGHT.

266. IT ALSO COMES WITH

267. "DICK CLARK'S PRACTICAL JOKES AND JUG BAND BLOOPERS."

268. YOU KNOW...

269. WOULD YOU PAY OVER 200 BUCKS FOR THIS COLLECTION?

270. WELL, I WOULDN'T.

271. AND WHAT ABOUT US WHO ONLY HAVE ONE NETWORK SHOW?

272. YOU KNOW...

273. WHEN I WAS A YOUNG BOY, I HAD A DOG NAMED JOE,

274. AND WHENEVER HE'D GET TOO FAR AWAY,

275. I'D PUT ON A YOKO ONO RECORD,

276. AND HE WOULD COME RUNNING BACK REALLY QUICKLY.

277. AND LUCKILY, THAT SONG IS ON THIS ALBUM.

278. THE GREAT YOKO ONO ATTORNEY HIT —

279. "ATTORNE-E-E-E-E-Y."

280. BONG!

281. BONG!

282. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

283. WE'LL FIND OUT WHO THE WINNER IS.

284. HEY! WELCOME BACK TO "WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY?"

285. TONIGHT'S WINNERS ARE EVERYBODY BUT WAYNE.

286. EVERYBODY BUT WAYNE IS A WINNER TONIGHT.

287. WE'RE GOING TO DO A GAME CALLED "FOREIGN FILM DUB."

288. KATHY AND I ARE GOING TO DO IT,

289. AND THESE GUYS ARE GOING TO TRANSLATE.

290. WE'RE GOING TO PRETEND TO SPEAK IN A FOREIGN LANGUAGE.

291. RYAN'S GOING TO TRANSLATE FOR ME.

292. COLIN'S GOING TO TRANSLATE FOR KATHY.

293. WHAT LANGUAGE?

294. SWEDISH IS GOOD. WE'LL DO SWEDISH.

295. IF YOU WERE A SWEDISH ACTION FILM DIRECTOR,

296. WHAT WOULD THE NAME OF YOUR MOVIE BE?

297. WHAT WAS THAT ONE?

298. "BIKINI JONES." I LIKE THAT ONE.

299. OH, "LOOK OUT — SNOW! A BIKINI JONES MOVIE."

300. IN SWEDISH.

301. OKAY, READY? HERE WE GO.

302. YOU LOOK HOT, VERY HOT.

303. YOU KNOW IT, BABY.

304. I BET YOU CAN'T WAIT TO SEE MY THONG.

305. YOU'RE SO WRONG.

306. I LOVE YOU SO VERY MUCH,

307. BUT I'VE HAD TOO MANY MEATBALLS.

308. OH, YOU'RE NOT TOO BAD.

309. IKEA... UNBELIEVABLE PRICES.

310. THANK YOU.

311. LOOK AT THE SNOW.

312. WE MUST RUN OUT THERE AND MELT IT.

313. I FEEL LIKE I'M ON "BAYWATCH."

314. TAKE OFF YOUR CLOTHES. WEAR THE BIKINI.

315. IT FEELS SO GOOD.

316. SADLY, I HAVE BUT ONE NIPPLE TO GIVE.

317. WE'LL BE BACK WITH MORE "WHOSE LINE" AFTER THIS.

318. DON'T GO ANYWHERE.

319. WELCOME BACK TO "WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY?"

320. WE'RE GOING TO END THE SHOW WITH WAYNE AND KATHY

321. READING THE CREDITS AS TWO CHEERLEADERS

322. AT A NATIONAL COMPETITION.

323. GOOD NIGHT, EVERYBODY. THANKS FOR WATCHING.

324. ARE YOU READY FOR DAN PATTERSON? GIVE ME A "D."

325. I'M READY! READY! GO, DENISE O'DONOGHUE!

326. MARK LEVESON AND ARTHUR FORREST!

327. TOM PARK!

328. AND MARY CONNELLY! MARY CONNELLY!

329. DREW, DREW, DREW, DREW!

330. EVERYBODY, LINDA TAYLOR, LAURA HALL! HUH! DREW, DREW!

331. GIVE ME KEITH RICHMOND!

332. EVE McGORRILL AND ALISON SIDERIS!

333. OH, ALISON! ALISON!

334. WHOO! PYRAMID! PYRAMID!