1. Our neighbor Sean
has begun a bidCopy !req
2. to ruthlessly unseat
Staten Island's rulersCopy !req
3. so that the crown
of absolute powerCopy !req
4. may rest solely upon his head.Copy !req
5. Com... Comptroller.Copy !req
6. What the fuck is that?Copy !req
7. The comptroller
controls the budgetCopy !req
8. for all of Staten Island.Copy !req
9. I'm really proud
of my campaign platform:Copy !req
10. Bring the Rangers
back to Staten Island.Copy !req
11. So, I think I'm gonna win.Copy !req
12. - Ah.
- Ah. Seanie.Copy !req
13. Typically, in a situation
such as this,Copy !req
14. the best move is to identify
your opponentsCopy !req
15. and then slaughter them
in their sleep.Copy !req
16. Yeah, yeah, I wish, but, uh,Copy !req
17. no, we just got to get
the most votes.Copy !req
18. But our latest round of internal pollingCopy !req
19. has revealed that we have,
uh, a couple of weak spots.Copy !req
20. Particularly,
the gay demographic.Copy !req
21. So we got to do something that's
gonna knock their socks off.Copy !req
22. Which is why we are doing
a Pride parade!Copy !req
23. - Right here in Staten Island.
- Yeah.Copy !req
24. Looks great.Copy !req
25. So, you two are organizing
a Pride parade?Copy !req
26. Yeah!Copy !req
27. I'm a little skeptical.Copy !req
28. I've never actually
been to Pride.Copy !req
29. But something tells me...
neither have Sean and Charmaine.Copy !req
30. - My lesbian roommate from SUNY New Paltz,
- Oh, yeah.Copy !req
31. she's gonna come
and do some rhythmic gymnastics.Copy !req
32. Oh, yeah,
and my bisexual cousin Dominic?Copy !req
33. You remember him.Copy !req
34. Oh, I certainly do.Copy !req
35. He is gonna lip-synch to some hot tunesCopy !req
36. - all night long.
- Ooh, yeah.Copy !req
37. Respectfully, uh, Neighbor Sean...Copy !req
38. - Yes.
- What has this got to do with us?Copy !req
39. We are very busy.Copy !req
40. A little bird recently
flew into my bedroomCopy !req
41. and I've been trying
to make him my friend.Copy !req
42. Yeah, well, uh, we just wanted
to consult with you guysCopy !req
43. considering you're members of
the LGBTQ... LMNOP community.Copy !req
44. And we consider you guys
heroes for that.Copy !req
45. Literally the gayest things
on the block.Copy !req
46. I like what you've been saying.
It's been very entertaining.Copy !req
47. But just for two seconds,
shut the fuck up.Copy !req
48. I know why you're here.Copy !req
49. You want us to grand marshal
your gay parade?Copy !req
50. That's a thumbs up.Copy !req
51. You want to start your
gay parade on our front lawn?Copy !req
52. That's two thumbs up.Copy !req
53. What are those vehicles calledCopy !req
54. that are all brightly colored?Copy !req
55. - Very jolly.
- Oh...Copy !req
56. You mean chariots,Copy !req
57. dragging the corpses
of your vanquished foes.Copy !req
58. - We call them "floats."
- Yeah.Copy !req
59. - The corpses float also.
- Yes, yes, yes.Copy !req
60. The fire department, the wives,
they've all signed upCopy !req
61. to make a big float for us.Copy !req
62. Really? Tell those
wives to get fucked.Copy !req
63. - Oh.
- I'm gonna make the float.Copy !req
64. It'll be the most fantastic
thing you've ever seen.Copy !req
65. Okay...Copy !req
66. That's way more
than we expected.Copy !req
67. We just came here to seeCopy !req
68. which one of these T-shirts
you liked better.Copy !req
69. Yeah, we got two choices:Copy !req
70. "Yas Sean!"Copy !req
71. And "Ay,
I'm Bein' Gay Ova Here!"Copy !req
72. We'll buy the lot.Copy !req
73. What is at the root
of all this pain here?Copy !req
74. Besides your legs
being crushed, I mean.Copy !req
75. Of course I'm still pissed off
at Nadja for crushing meCopy !req
76. with her vampire ass.Copy !req
77. I mean, look at this bullshit.Copy !req
78. I'm three-quarters
mechanical automaton.Copy !req
79. Ah, shit.Copy !req
80. Well, I suppose the loss
of my dolly bodyCopy !req
81. has got me thinking
about my old human body.Copy !req
82. I never got to use it, fully.Copy !req
83. - Huh?
- I never got to experience...Copy !req
84. carnal pleasure?Copy !req
85. - What?
- Oh.Copy !req
86. I think what she means is...Copy !req
87. - She's a virgin.
- Nailed it.Copy !req
88. How can you be a virgin?Copy !req
89. Your spirit is identical
to my own and I am...Copy !req
90. definitely not a virgin.Copy !req
91. I am a manifestation
of your ghost, right?Copy !req
92. Which is who you were when
you died and became a vampire.Copy !req
93. And at that point,
you were a virgin.Copy !req
94. What about Jonas
the mule dancer?Copy !req
95. Strictly hand stuff.Copy !req
96. I remain a virgin
and I fear I always will be.Copy !req
97. If there was anything, anything
I could about this, I would,Copy !req
98. but sadly I just... I don't...Copy !req
99. Well, what if we swapped bodies?Copy !req
100. Just for a day.Copy !req
101. What a cute little idea,Copy !req
102. but unfortunately that
is definitely not possible.Copy !req
103. Oh, no, it's possible.Copy !req
104. The swapping of spirits
and their corporeal vessels.Copy !req
105. Actually, pretty easy.Copy !req
106. - Is it?
- Oh, yeah.Copy !req
107. - Well.
- Great!Copy !req
108. - Great.
- Great.Copy !req
109. Okay! Oh... great.Copy !req
110. - That is just...
- Great.Copy !req
111. Well, great.Copy !req
112. I have discovered why GuillermoCopy !req
113. has been avoiding me lately.Copy !req
114. He has fallen under
the sway of Laszlo.Copy !req
115. Laszlo is jealous because of how
much Guillermo worships me.Copy !req
116. Oh. There you are.Copy !req
117. Not now, Nandor.Copy !req
118. Can't you see I'm teaching
the boy science?Copy !req
119. - Thank you.
- But I...Copy !req
120. He has decided
to try and impress himCopy !req
121. with his only
impressive quality.Copy !req
122. Ooh!Copy !req
123. His quote,
unquote "intelligence."Copy !req
124. End quote.Copy !req
125. - Maybe I just—
- No, Nandor.Copy !req
126. I personally value qualities
that cannot be taught.Copy !req
127. Courage. Relentlessness.Copy !req
128. Being tall.Copy !req
129. Do you think he actually bought
that whole science lesson thing?Copy !req
130. Obviously.Copy !req
131. For if he knew the truth,Copy !req
132. that you've been
turned into a vampireCopy !req
133. by somebody other than him,Copy !req
134. you'd be fucking dead by now.Copy !req
135. How can I put this?Copy !req
136. The boy is...Copy !req
137. fucked up.Copy !req
138. Yeah, I really can't see
what's going on back there.Copy !req
139. I think it might be like a
psoriasis flareup or something.Copy !req
140. Yeah, that's exactly what it is.Copy !req
141. Can you move them?Copy !req
142. Move what?Copy !req
143. Nothing.Copy !req
144. All good and proper.Copy !req
145. Now, what I intend to doCopy !req
146. is carry out a few basic
experiments on the boy.Copy !req
147. Firstly, agility.Copy !req
148. Vampire super speed test
number 72, begin.Copy !req
149. Vampiric turnoffs.Copy !req
150. I'm holding
the garlic to your face.Copy !req
151. Is it having any effect?Copy !req
152. Telekinesis.Copy !req
153. Concentrate on that
antique flask and make it rise.Copy !req
154. Patient running at normal
human speed,Copy !req
155. slightly below
normal human speed.Copy !req
156. Lick it!Copy !req
157. - I'd rather not.
- If you don't lick it,Copy !req
158. I cannot diagnose you.Copy !req
159. Oh, that's not bad.Copy !req
160. And from that,
we'll have a better idea as toCopy !req
161. what kind of vampire he is,Copy !req
162. or isn't.Copy !req
163. I didn't ask you
to squeeze one out.Copy !req
164. If I knew you were
gonna do that,Copy !req
165. I'd have put
some newspaper down.Copy !req
166. I'm doing it.Copy !req
167. - Doing what? Squeezing one out?
- No.Copy !req
168. What the blazes?Copy !req
169. He's clearly been
afflicted by vampirism.Copy !req
170. All right, you can stop there.Copy !req
171. But his turning
has been stymied.Copy !req
172. Being a man of science,Copy !req
173. I intend to find out why.Copy !req
174. For this requires
a systematic reviewCopy !req
175. of everything we know
about vampirism.Copy !req
176. We must go back.Copy !req
177. Back to the beginning.Copy !req
178. Now clean that shit up.Copy !req
179. All right, so tonight is Friday.Copy !req
180. Otherwise known in spiritual
circles as Freaky Friday.Copy !req
181. And thus we are technically
able to swap your souls.Copy !req
182. And that's really how it works?Copy !req
183. - Yes.
- Okay, whatever.Copy !req
184. Fine. Can I just
get something clear?Copy !req
185. My dolly is going
to inhabit my bodyCopy !req
186. to use it to get completely
and utterly railed.Copy !req
187. - Yes, please.
- And then we will switch back?Copy !req
188. - Correct.
- Correct.Copy !req
189. Okay, so put your hands
on the orbCopy !req
190. and close your eyes.Copy !req
191. Daimes times nokti onidete.Copy !req
192. Mugok timek orgiyam takenti.Copy !req
193. Toyos togom skijas antagite!Copy !req
194. It worked!Copy !req
195. It's fucking amazing.Copy !req
196. I'm big, bitches!Copy !req
197. Uh, be careful. Maybe work
your way up a little bit?Copy !req
198. Ugh, I can't feel my feet.Copy !req
199. That's because you
don't have any.Copy !req
200. - Sucks, doesn't it?
- Easy.Copy !req
201. I forgot how amazing
it is to have a real body!Copy !req
202. - Stretch first!
- Wow!Copy !req
203. - Oh! Oh!
- Oh, watch out!Copy !req
204. So, who wants to have
a little biteCopy !req
205. of this fresh beef salad?Copy !req
206. Trust me, Dolly, you don't
want your first timeCopy !req
207. to be with anyone in this house.Copy !req
208. These people are ran-through.Copy !req
209. We are going to find you
a fresh piece of ass.Copy !req
210. Wait for me, koukla mou.Copy !req
211. I'm doing it.Copy !req
212. I'm a real body person.Copy !req
213. - Careful!
- Oh. Oh.Copy !req
214. That's right, we swapped bodies.Copy !req
215. Huh. Looks like they're turning
the GNC into a Jersey Mike's.Copy !req
216. None of you find
this interesting? Hello?Copy !req
217. Not really.Copy !req
218. I mean, you're kind of
the same person anyway.Copy !req
219. So, what? You swapped.
Big whoop.Copy !req
220. Talking of vampires,
which I believe you were...Copy !req
221. We weren't.Copy !req
222. what do we actually
know about them?Copy !req
223. Why...?Copy !req
224. Uh, for...Copy !req
225. the purposes of the float?Copy !req
226. Oh, I see. Boy stuff.
Vroom, vroom. Carry on.Copy !req
227. Vampires. The first thing that
comes into your head. Anybody.Copy !req
228. Oh, uh, they tend to form
insular social unitsCopy !req
229. and not let perceived
outsiders join the group.Copy !req
230. Like I said, what do we know
about vampires?Copy !req
231. Vampires always go soft
after two pumps.Copy !req
232. It's a classic vampire thing.Copy !req
233. - Uh...
- What about the one where if youCopy !req
234. drop a bunch of rice
in front of a vampireCopy !req
235. he has to count
every single grain?Copy !req
236. No, I, too, have heard that
before. But I think it's cack.Copy !req
237. - Hmm, but there again, it might not be.
- Isn't there a thingCopy !req
238. that if you throw a vampire's
shoe into the river,Copy !req
239. you have to follow it?Copy !req
240. Oh, yes, true.Copy !req
241. Don't be silly, it's not a shoe.Copy !req
242. It is a sock.Copy !req
243. Come on, this is classic
Vampire 101 shit, guys.Copy !req
244. Well, the only way
I'm gonna find this outCopy !req
245. is if I put it to the test.Copy !req
246. Come on, Gizmo.Copy !req
247. Oh, and me.
I'd like to come, too.Copy !req
248. I don't think so.Copy !req
249. No, you-you should
probably stay with SeanCopy !req
250. and help him with the float,
for the parade.Copy !req
251. Or talk to your bird
in-in your room.Copy !req
252. I'm not speaking to Matthew
at the moment.Copy !req
253. All right, fine.Copy !req
254. I know when I'm not wanted.Copy !req
255. And this is not
one of those times.Copy !req
256. Come on, boys!Copy !req
257. So, I thought there's
no better place for my DollyCopy !req
258. to find some piping-hot strange
than speed dating.Copy !req
259. Hello, everyone. I'm a virgin.Copy !req
260. I already regret this.Copy !req
261. I used to be dead,
and then I was a ghost,Copy !req
262. and then I was a doll,
and now...Copy !req
263. I am human once more.Copy !req
264. How about you?Copy !req
265. - I'm in sales.
- Ooh.Copy !req
266. Mud huts or livestock?Copy !req
267. I like him.Copy !req
268. My dowry is really cheap.Copy !req
269. Just one large goose and before
you can even slit its throat,Copy !req
270. boom, I'm your wife.Copy !req
271. Oof.Copy !req
272. How do you feel about taking
the virginity of a dead ghost?Copy !req
273. It's your lucky night.Copy !req
274. Ugh.Copy !req
275. - Oh, dear.
- You like? Woo!Copy !req
276. Opa!Copy !req
277. Ela! This is a mating danceCopy !req
278. because I have selected you
to be my mate.Copy !req
279. Look how wide I am.Copy !req
280. Please, no physical touch.Copy !req
281. Fuck off, lady!Copy !req
282. Okay. All right.
You are out of here. Come on.Copy !req
283. What? No, I was just doing a date.Copy !req
284. Yes, thank you, remove us.Copy !req
285. - Come on.
- Oh.Copy !req
286. Commence the test.Copy !req
287. Absolutely no urge
to count the rice.Copy !req
288. I don't know what Colin Robinson
was talking about.Copy !req
289. Another vampire myth
proved to be nonsense.Copy !req
290. But just before I attend
to other duties...Copy !req
291. - Yes.
- One.Copy !req
292. - Two. Four.
- Three.Copy !req
293. - Five.
- Six.Copy !req
294. Maybe we should move
on to the next test?Copy !req
295. Shut up. Seven.Copy !req
296. - Eight. Ten.
- Nine. Eleven.Copy !req
297. All right, next up is vampires
can triple jump?Copy !req
298. Ah.Copy !req
299. What does that even mean?Copy !req
300. I'll show you what it means.Copy !req
301. One.Copy !req
302. Two.Copy !req
303. Three! See?Copy !req
304. Oh.Copy !req
305. Yo, Laz. What you
doing up there?Copy !req
306. Oh, hi, Sean.Copy !req
307. Um, just checking out
your float.Copy !req
308. Looks fantastic.Copy !req
309. - Good night.
- See ya.Copy !req
310. So, two small jumps,
and on the third jump,Copy !req
311. jump real high, like Mario.Copy !req
312. Mario who?Copy !req
313. Why bother with fancy jumps
when you can just fly?Copy !req
314. - Flying does have its limits.
- Oh, really?Copy !req
315. A vampire can only ascend
as highCopy !req
316. as the lowest cloud in the area.Copy !req
317. Well, I think that is more
of a Laszlo thingCopy !req
318. than a vampire thing.Copy !req
319. Really?Copy !req
320. Well, how high can you fly?Copy !req
321. Outer space.Copy !req
322. Write that down.Copy !req
323. Maybe not write that down,
on the account of it being...Copy !req
324. bullshit.Copy !req
325. I get it, you have never
flown to outer space.Copy !req
326. No.Copy !req
327. For some, it is
a little too scary.Copy !req
328. But not for me.Copy !req
329. That's why I've done it
many times.Copy !req
330. I mean, you know,Copy !req
331. I've flown up like really high.Copy !req
332. Now, have I technically flown
to outer space?Copy !req
333. No.Copy !req
334. But there's no reason
why I couldn't.Copy !req
335. I mean, I don't have to breathe
oxygen or any shit like that.Copy !req
336. So, yeah.Copy !req
337. I did not lie.Copy !req
338. I am essentially the king
of outer space.Copy !req
339. Of course you are, Major Tom.Copy !req
340. Enough of that nonsense.Copy !req
341. Find me a river
I can toss my sock into.Copy !req
342. You know what?Copy !req
343. I think I might just fly
to outer space right now!Copy !req
344. Not you or you can stop me.Copy !req
345. Or you!Copy !req
346. So, good luck with your shitty
little science experiments,Copy !req
347. because I'm going
to outer space!Copy !req
348. Well, speed dating was a bust.Copy !req
349. But, there is one person in the
house the doll is horny for.Copy !req
350. I don't like this decision,Copy !req
351. but since we all F each other
all the time here anyway,Copy !req
352. I can't be a hypocrite.Copy !req
353. - Right?
- Nope.Copy !req
354. So, let me get this straight.Copy !req
355. Nadja Doll, who's currently
in Real Nadja's bodyCopy !req
356. wants to have sex with me?Copy !req
357. - Uh-huh.
- Yep.Copy !req
358. And Real Nadja,
who's currently inhabitingCopy !req
359. Nadja Doll's body is...
fine with this?Copy !req
360. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
361. And-and you're not gonna
kill me after...?Copy !req
362. No!Copy !req
363. I'm open to it, I-I just...Copy !req
364. I don't want it to affect
our friendship.Copy !req
365. What friendship?Copy !req
366. Oh, no, we don't really
like you that much.Copy !req
367. I-I wouldn't say we are friends.Copy !req
368. No.Copy !req
369. Okay, then why do you
want to doink me?Copy !req
370. This guy doesn't
understand women at all.Copy !req
371. Oh, dear.Copy !req
372. Hey, Gray Boy.Copy !req
373. I'm offering it to you
on a plate.Copy !req
374. The information I've gathered
today has revolutionizedCopy !req
375. my entire conception
of vampire kind.Copy !req
376. I just don't see
how that's gonna speedCopy !req
377. - the process of turning me.
- Patience, dear boy. Patience.Copy !req
378. Now, give me your arm.Copy !req
379. Ah, just as I hypothesized.Copy !req
380. You skin has some of
the properties of a vampire,Copy !req
381. yet you are still able to walk
under the rays of the sun.Copy !req
382. So, does that mean
I'm a day walker?Copy !req
383. Am I like Blade?Copy !req
384. Yeah, you're exactly like Blade.Copy !req
385. Fuck off.Copy !req
386. Now, sit still.Copy !req
387. Ow. Okay.Copy !req
388. A little of that on my arm.Copy !req
389. Add my special light.Copy !req
390. Starting to sting.Copy !req
391. Getting a bit more painful.Copy !req
392. Fuck.Copy !req
393. That's fascinating.Copy !req
394. So fascinating!Copy !req
395. Right. Strip off, cock ahoy,
and get on the running machine.Copy !req
396. Wait, what?Copy !req
397. I need three gallons
of your sweat for science.Copy !req
398. Mind if I put on some music
to get us in the mood?Copy !req
399. Mm.Copy !req
400. Woo! Ooh, yeah.Copy !req
401. Love it. Mmm.Copy !req
402. I really can't decideCopy !req
403. whether it's weirder
if I'm here,Copy !req
404. or not here.Copy !req
405. Same.Copy !req
406. - And he comes in.
- Ooh.Copy !req
407. Oh, it's happening. Oh, boy.Copy !req
408. - I'm gonna kiss you.
- Okay.Copy !req
409. - I-I can't.
- Oh.Copy !req
410. I'm sorry. Don't get me wrong.Copy !req
411. I like how fucked-up this is.Copy !req
412. I-I really like
how fucked-up this is.Copy !req
413. I just... I think I'm only
attracted to you in doll form.Copy !req
414. - I get that.
- Are you kidding me?Copy !req
415. Sorry, Nadja. Daddy likey
what Daddy likey.Copy !req
416. Dolly bae, maybe
we can try againCopy !req
417. in another hundred years or so.Copy !req
418. But I have barely
gotten to do anything.Copy !req
419. I haven't even used this yet.Copy !req
420. Come on. "Swap back" time.Copy !req
421. I'm not going anywhere.Copy !req
422. I just need to mention nowCopy !req
423. that I cannot force a spirit
to leave a vessel.Copy !req
424. What the fuck?Copy !req
425. Sassy leaving dance.Copy !req
426. - Ooh.
- No. Bitch.Copy !req
427. - Come back.
- Yeah, there was no wayCopy !req
428. I was gonna tap that.Copy !req
429. If it's so hard to swap us back,Copy !req
430. why did you swap us
in the first place?Copy !req
431. Wait, so you're saying you can't
make a spirit leave a vessel,Copy !req
432. but could you put two spirits
in the same vessel?Copy !req
433. Oh. I don't see why not.Copy !req
434. Oh...Copy !req
435. After a distillation process...Copy !req
436. It gives me no pleasure to
lather my skin in Gizmo's sweat.Copy !req
437. Yet, I have reason to believeCopy !req
438. it contains
extraordinary powers.Copy !req
439. Powers that enable a vampireCopy !req
440. to walk under
the shining rays...Copy !req
441. of the sun.Copy !req
442. If my calculations
aren't correct,Copy !req
443. I could be a lump
of coal in seconds.Copy !req
444. Ha! But you only live once.Copy !req
445. Holy shit! That is bright.Copy !req
446. There you go.Copy !req
447. This is amazing.Copy !req
448. - Ha ha!
- Oh, hell yeah, Laz.Copy !req
449. There's so much heat on our
campaign now, it's unbelievable.Copy !req
450. Paul Shaffer's limo driver
reposted our flyer on Instagram.Copy !req
451. You have the most
beautiful skin.Copy !req
452. Yeah, I use Charmaine's
foot cream.Copy !req
453. What do you think
about the float?Copy !req
454. H-How's that coming along?Copy !req
455. The float? Oh, it's fantastic.Copy !req
456. I've been working on it
noon and night.Copy !req
457. Now, do me a favor.Copy !req
458. Could I borrow a beach chaise?Copy !req
459. - Beach chaise?
- I promise it's for the float.Copy !req
460. Something that one might
sit out in the sun on.Copy !req
461. What the fuck is a beach chaise?
Is that French?Copy !req
462. They're lawn chairs, Seanie.
Yeah, we got lawn chairs.Copy !req
463. Thank you very much, very kind.Copy !req
464. - Now I want to go to the beach.
- Did you see my sign?Copy !req
465. Then go to the beach.Copy !req
466. Yes.Copy !req
467. Fetch that!Copy !req
468. Hey...Copy !req
469. Ooh.Copy !req
470. Master, what are you—Copy !req
471. Why are you awake?Copy !req
472. I decided to get up early,Copy !req
473. to prepare for my upcoming
journey to outer space.Copy !req
474. What? You're not
really thinking aboutCopy !req
475. going to outer space, are you?Copy !req
476. Yes. It turns out
there are thingsCopy !req
477. that I can do that your
little teacher Laszlo cannot.Copy !req
478. I know that you've become
enamored with his intelligence,Copy !req
479. but it is not intelligence
that got mankind to outer space.Copy !req
480. It took brute strength
and gumption.Copy !req
481. These are clearly things
that do not interest you.Copy !req
482. Wait. Are you going
to outer spaceCopy !req
483. just to impress me?Copy !req
484. Sorry, what?Copy !req
485. Am I doing this
to impress Guillermo?Copy !req
486. Yes.Copy !req
487. Esti toraiti nokti onidete.Copy !req
488. Now, Colin Robinson came up
with an actually not horrible ideaCopy !req
489. of having his soul
put into my real bodyCopy !req
490. to convince my Dolly spirit
to leave.Copy !req
491. Neves daugite!Copy !req
492. Huh. Look at that,
I guess it worked.Copy !req
493. I know what
you're trying to do.Copy !req
494. You're trying to smoke me out,Copy !req
495. you tricksy little bitches.Copy !req
496. Well, eat skata.Copy !req
497. Because I actually quite
like this new company.Copy !req
498. Oh, I think I'm gonna go
just read my newspaper.Copy !req
499. No, I want to go
practice cartwheels.Copy !req
500. No, I want to go finish my blog
about being a male feminist. No!Copy !req
501. Oh, nice going, dipshit.Copy !req
502. Push him over.Copy !req
503. No, let me go!Copy !req
504. It is almost time for my ascent.Copy !req
505. Thanks, guys, for lending me
the itty-bitty baby cameras.Copy !req
506. Cute.Copy !req
507. Hi, it's Nandor here.Copy !req
508. And here.Copy !req
509. We do not go to outer space
because it is easy,Copy !req
510. we go because it is hard.Copy !req
511. Taking off in three...Copy !req
512. - And because it will be fun.
- In two...Copy !req
513. - I hope.
- And one...Copy !req
514. Liftoff!Copy !req
515. I am approximately 20 feet
above the backyard.Copy !req
516. Roger, over and out, good buddy.Copy !req
517. Go, Rita!Copy !req
518. Thank you, Rita the lesbian
roommate. And I loveCopy !req
519. the LGBD... etcetera community.Copy !req
520. - Q.
- And the Qs.Copy !req
521. Which brings me
to tonight's guestsCopy !req
522. who are gonna help us
kick off the festivities.Copy !req
523. They are what Staten Island
is all about.Copy !req
524. They're immigrants.Copy !req
525. They're big-time gays.Copy !req
526. Big-time!Copy !req
527. Super duper gay.Copy !req
528. All right, yeah, Okay.Copy !req
529. Without further ado,
come on out, guys!Copy !req
530. Hey, it's Laz!Copy !req
531. Yes!Copy !req
532. What the hell happened
to your face, man?Copy !req
533. Just caught a bit of sun,
do you like it?Copy !req
534. - The bloody mirror...
- You idiot.Copy !req
535. - Okay.
- Hey, say hey if you're gay.Copy !req
536. Hey!Copy !req
537. Come on, let's have a clap
for gay!Copy !req
538. Let me tell you something,Copy !req
539. this fella tries
to kiss me all the time.Copy !req
540. That's right!Copy !req
541. He does.Copy !req
542. Right, I'm not the only grand
marshal of this gay parade.Copy !req
543. Nandor.Copy !req
544. - Now, where is Nandor? What?
- Laszlo.Copy !req
545. He's busy doing—Copy !req
546. He's what?Copy !req
547. So, I'm very high up now.Copy !req
548. At least five miles.Copy !req
549. I'm getting
a little light-headed.Copy !req
550. Oh, it's a fucking plane.Copy !req
551. Hi, plane.Copy !req
552. All right, all right, all right.Copy !req
553. Let's welcome
the most beautiful girlCopy !req
554. I know and I've ever met.Copy !req
555. My good lady wife Nadja.
Come on.Copy !req
556. - Oh, she's right here. I've got her.
- I'm here.Copy !req
557. Quiet, crone!Copy !req
558. Hello, everyone. Thank you all
so much for coming.Copy !req
559. What the hell's wrong with her?Copy !req
560. Whoa.Copy !req
561. Seriously, it means a lot to us.Copy !req
562. Oh, shit.Copy !req
563. You put acid in my beer again.Copy !req
564. Shut up, Colin Robinson!Copy !req
565. Holy shit.Copy !req
566. Woo! Being gay!Copy !req
567. My turn again.Copy !req
568. What the fuck is happening?Copy !req
569. Okay, so that's what happensCopy !req
570. when you put two souls
in one body.Copy !req
571. Good to know.Copy !req
572. Why did Guillermo
make me do this?Copy !req
573. It fucking sucks!Copy !req
574. I did it.Copy !req
575. I fucking did it.Copy !req
576. I'm in outer space.Copy !req
577. Fuck you, Laszlo.Copy !req
578. Fuck you, Guillermo!Copy !req
579. I made it to outer space!Copy !req
580. It really makes you reflect
on how small we all are.Copy !req
581. Wait...Copy !req
582. No, no, no.Copy !req
583. Let's go.Copy !req
584. She does have
a beautiful voice, though.Copy !req
585. Okay, who's ready for a parade?Copy !req
586. - What the fuck?
- What the blazes?Copy !req
587. Master, are you all right?Copy !req
588. Well, well, well...Copy !req
589. If it isn't Mr. Vampires
Can't Go to Outer Space.Copy !req
590. Guess what.Copy !req
591. Hey, I just went to outer space!Copy !req
592. Turn around, I-I want
to see what's happening.Copy !req
593. No, I'm looking.Copy !req
594. Again, who's ready for a parade?Copy !req
595. - How gay is this?
- We're bringing back the Rangers.Copy !req
596. Remember to vote Rinaldi!Copy !req
597. No, I'm dancing.Copy !req
598. I went to space!Copy !req
599. We're proud, we're so proud.Copy !req
600. - We're doing it!
- Woo!Copy !req
601. I was hoping I'd meet some
little green buddies up there.Copy !req
602. Yes, my darling.
Give it to her good.Copy !req
603. - Oh, hi, Guillermo. Hoo-hoo!
- Oh!Copy !req
604. Oh-ho-ho.Copy !req
605. - Gather round, everyone.
- Oh, yes.Copy !req
606. Nope, nope,
I'm not staying for this.Copy !req
607. - Prude.
- Are you sure?Copy !req
608. Am I hitting the spot,
Colin Robinson?Copy !req
609. Oh, yeah. Nah, that's fine.
Just fine.Copy !req