1. Previously
on this documentary...Copy !req
2. Colin Robinson is dying.Copy !req
3. I will be returning to EnglandCopy !req
4. to assume a position on theCopy !req
5. Supreme Vampiric Council.Copy !req
6. Will you do me the honor
of accompanying me on my journeyCopy !req
7. around the world?Copy !req
8. - Make sure
you look after my wife.
- What? Aah! No!Copy !req
9. There are, it seems,
others in our worldCopy !req
10. whose existence
is even more terrifyingCopy !req
11. and mysterious than our own.Copy !req
12. Shit.Copy !req
13. Josh and Elana wanted
an open concept,Copy !req
14. so we suggested taking downCopy !req
15. the wall dividing the kitchen
and dining roomCopy !req
16. and using a terra-cotta
backsplash to unify the space...Copy !req
17. Terra-cotta backsplash would
make a great accent.Copy !req
18. What he hasn't mentioned is that
that's a load-bearing wall.Copy !req
19. this was
a low-bearing wall...Copy !req
20. Oh, I've spoken too soon.Copy !req
21. Apologies to you, Bran.Copy !req
22. What the... Ah.Copy !req
23. Hello there. Long time no see.Copy !req
24. - Come on in, but keep it down.
- Okay.Copy !req
25. I've found that
this is the only thingCopy !req
26. that'll lull him to sleep.Copy !req
27. Since Nadja and Nandor departed,
it's been just me and the lad.Copy !req
28. I don't want to call him
Colin Robinson,Copy !req
29. even though he did crawl out ofCopy !req
30. the chest cavity of
the deceased Colin Robinson.Copy !req
31. He really is his own little man,Copy !req
32. and I'd like
to keep it that way.Copy !req
33. So, I just call him boy.Copy !req
34. He's been growing
at a remarkable rate,Copy !req
35. and he's a wild little creature,Copy !req
36. full of mischief and surprises.Copy !req
37. - Shit. There we are. Good boy.Copy !req
38. And not a bit the boring,
energy-draining Colin RobinsonCopy !req
39. from whence he came.Copy !req
40. He's a good little helper.Copy !req
41. Boy, I'm gonna need one nail.Copy !req
42. - Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.Copy !req
43. Yeah. All right.Copy !req
44. Helping me maintain this house.Copy !req
45. One.Copy !req
46. Which, I'm sure you've noticed,Copy !req
47. has seen better days.Copy !req
48. He's given me
a sense of purpose.Copy !req
49. And under my tutelage,
with exposure to woodcraft,Copy !req
50. scintillating conversation...Copy !req
51. - Good work, boy.
- ... high culture...Copy !req
52. - En garde.
- ... and, of course,
swordsmanship...Copy !req
53. - Ha.
- Shit.Copy !req
54. - Ah, you're getting better.Copy !req
55. I think I can moldCopy !req
56. this blank canvas of a boyCopy !req
57. into the most interesting adult
there has ever been.Copy !req
58. - Oh, no.Copy !req
59. It's those bastards
from the gas company.Copy !req
60. Yes, there's a gas leak.Copy !req
61. Yes, I need to do
something about it.Copy !req
62. Yes, if you turn up again,
I'm gonna kill you.Copy !req
63. - All right, all right.Copy !req
64. All these wooden boxes and shit
have been arrivingCopy !req
65. for my wife for weeks.Copy !req
66. I do mean to send them on
to London,Copy !req
67. but I've been too busy
murdering these gas employeesCopy !req
68. that they insist
on sending round.Copy !req
69. - Guess who.Copy !req
70. Where the hell
did you come from?Copy !req
71. Well, I had a little help.Copy !req
72. - Surprise!
- My darling!Copy !req
73. - Oh, my love.
- Every day of your absenceCopy !req
74. - Oh, I've missed you so much.
- has felt like a decade.Copy !req
75. Every decade, a century.
Let's fuck.Copy !req
76. These guys are still alive?Copy !req
77. - Yeah, yeah, doesn't matter.Copy !req
78. Don't you want to know
why I've returned from London?Copy !req
79. Yeah, you can tell me later.
It'll wait.Copy !req
80. My work with the Worldwide
Supreme Vampiric Council wasCopy !req
81. so challenging
but also fulfilling, you know?Copy !req
82. - Yeah.
- And... and I gave it all up.Copy !req
83. I had to,Copy !req
84. because I missed you so much.Copy !req
85. - My wide lover.
- Your wise mov...Copy !req
86. - You are a naughty bloody boy.Copy !req
87. You were supposed
to come with me to London,Copy !req
88. but you just packed me up
and shipped me off.Copy !req
89. My darling,
I had to look after the boy.Copy !req
90. - I wrote to you.
- Yes, yes,Copy !req
91. about creature that crawled out
of the cavity ofCopy !req
92. dead Colin Robinson's chest.
I understand, I guess.Copy !req
93. Speak of the devil.Copy !req
94. Hello. Is that you, little one?Copy !req
95. - Mommy's home.
- That's not him.Copy !req
96. Are you sure?Copy !req
97. Yes, that's a raccoon,
my darling.Copy !req
98. - They've taken residence
in the library.Copy !req
99. - Oh.
- The boy himself
is upstairs, asleep.Copy !req
100. Well, perfect, then.Copy !req
101. - Yeah.
- I want to peel you
like a potatoCopy !req
102. and mash your insides.Copy !req
103. - Come on.
- Okay.Copy !req
104. - Watch your step, my darling.Copy !req
105. The water damage
has ruined the wood.Copy !req
106. - Not this wood.Copy !req
107. Shit, I almost forgot.Copy !req
108. Before we go upstairs,Copy !req
109. I have a little surprise
for you.Copy !req
110. - It'll wait.Copy !req
111. Come on!Copy !req
112. Wassup...!Copy !req
113. Uh, it is a saying
from the olden daysCopy !req
114. that I learned on my travels.Copy !req
115. I don't know what it means,Copy !req
116. but I like how it sounds.Copy !req
117. Yeah, well, it's a great story.Copy !req
118. - Thank you.
- But, uh,Copy !req
119. darling, "why haven't
we finished fucking?",Copy !req
120. you might ask yourself.Copy !req
121. Well, the answer isCopy !req
122. it's 'cause we haven't
managed to start yet.Copy !req
123. - Do excuse us.
- Laszlo.Copy !req
124. I know you're not
a sentimental fellow,Copy !req
125. and neither am I,Copy !req
126. - but I have missed you.
- Aw.Copy !req
127. And it feels really good
to be back in the house!Copy !req
128. - Shit.
- Fucking hell.Copy !req
129. - Is he dead? Huh?
- I'm okay!Copy !req
130. - No?
- I'm okay.Copy !req
131. There's a very strong smell
of gas leak down here.Copy !req
132. - Could someone throw me down
a lit candle,Copy !req
133. and I can find my way out?Copy !req
134. My eat, prey, love journey?Copy !req
135. Where to begin?Copy !req
136. As fate would have it,
I got as far as...Copy !req
137. Fresno, I think it is called.Copy !req
138. I met a very plump family
on the trainCopy !req
139. from Wisconsin.Copy !req
140. I planned to drain them,Copy !req
141. but they were quite endearing.Copy !req
142. They had a very particular
way of speaking,Copy !req
143. It was like, um...Copy !req
144. "Oh, hey there, Nandor.Copy !req
145. "You want to come see
the Packers poundCopy !req
146. the frozen tundra
of the Lambeau Field?"Copy !req
147. Something like that.Copy !req
148. The love and the affection that
this family had for each other,Copy !req
149. it made me miss my own family.Copy !req
150. I grew homesick,
not for Staten IslandCopy !req
151. but my real home in Al Qolnidar.Copy !req
152. So I booked passage
on a container shipCopy !req
153. to...Copy !req
154. - I kind of get the ideaCopy !req
155. that you guys aren't really
listening to what I'm saying.Copy !req
156. - We're listening.
- Yeah, I mean,Copy !req
157. I'm capable of doing
two things at once.Copy !req
158. - Faster.
- Go on.Copy !req
159. Something about
a container ship.Copy !req
160. - Mm-hmm.
- Anyway, so,Copy !req
161. I hitched a ride on a ship,Copy !req
162. and after I'd drained
all of the crew,Copy !req
163. we ran into a little delay.Copy !req
164. A traffic jam on one ofCopy !req
165. the most important waterways
in the world.Copy !req
166. The Suez Canal
was blocked on TuesdayCopy !req
167. when a very large
container carrier got s...Copy !req
168. Finally, I found my way back
to Al Qolnidar.Copy !req
169. - My h...Copy !req
170. Oh, wow.Copy !req
171. - Look at you.
- Hello, darling.Copy !req
172. That was the baby
Colin Robinson, I assume?Copy !req
173. No. That came from the body
of Colin Robinson,Copy !req
174. but is something completely
different entirely.Copy !req
175. Is it boring
like Colin Robinson?Copy !req
176. - Well, now that
is an excellent question.
- Thank you.Copy !req
177. One that I have been
vigorously applyingCopy !req
178. my scientific method to
for the past two months.Copy !req
179. My work began with
experiments in isolation.Copy !req
180. - I dabbled in phrenology.Copy !req
181. Disappointed. Shocked.Copy !req
182. Happy. Puzzled.Copy !req
183. Fortifying good judgment.Copy !req
184. Important literature
or colorful shit.Copy !req
185. - Um...
- Make your choice.Copy !req
186. - No!Copy !req
187. - And, of course,
electroshock therapy.Copy !req
188. Again.Copy !req
189. I subjected him to all manner
of boring imagery.Copy !req
190. He found it just as tedious
as I did.Copy !req
191. I am delighted to report that
he is not and will not grow intoCopy !req
192. the boring energy vampire
from whence he came.Copy !req
193. Rubbish.Copy !req
194. Only today, I wasCopy !req
195. conducting a new experiment...Copy !req
196. Are you two having sex again?Copy !req
197. Well, I'm not
baking a cake, Nandor.Copy !req
198. It would be so much
more enjoyableCopy !req
199. if you would stop interrupting.Copy !req
200. - Or you could join in, old chap.
- Come on.Copy !req
201. Room in the back.Copy !req
202. I'm tempted, but, uh,
I'll leave you guys to itCopy !req
203. - and just watch,
if that's all right.
- Okay.Copy !req
204. Yes, I'm cl...
I'm really close.Copy !req
205. You might have to
calm this down, my darling.Copy !req
206. I'm not sure
this settee can take it.Copy !req
207. - This settee has taken
centuries of our love.Copy !req
208. - Whoa.Copy !req
209. Are you okay?Copy !req
210. You want me to
throw you down a candle?Copy !req
211. - Fuck me.
- Okay, here I go.Copy !req
212. - They're at it again.Copy !req
213. Are you doing a role play
or are you really drowning?Copy !req
214. Drowning, my darling.
It's hot, yeah?Copy !req
215. - Listen to this place.Copy !req
216. It sounds like the entire house
is going to collapseCopy !req
217. - at any moment. Ay! Ay! The f...
- Careful, old chap.Copy !req
218. - There's a hole there.Copy !req
219. What is that thumping?Copy !req
220. It's just bad pipes. It'll pass.Copy !req
221. I had to take
a sledgehammer to that wall,Copy !req
222. - that wall and that wall
down there.Copy !req
223. - Oh.
- I tried to find the culprit,
but so far, no luck.Copy !req
224. We are running out of rooms
to sit inCopy !req
225. that aren't completely
falling apart.Copy !req
226. - It's true.
- I do wish Guillermo
was still here.Copy !req
227. At least he kept the house
tidy and shipshape.Copy !req
228. Who's he talking about?Copy !req
229. - Guillermo.
- Who?Copy !req
230. You know, Guillermo.Copy !req
231. Doesn't matter how many times
you keep saying it.Copy !req
232. He's about this tall,
glasses, shitty sweater.Copy !req
233. Nadja, I think it's time.Copy !req
234. Oh! That reminds me.Copy !req
235. I have got a teensy
little present for you both.Copy !req
236. - Oh.
- Oh.
- Now...Copy !req
237. Okay, don't get too excited.Copy !req
238. It's not that good.Copy !req
239. Should I cover my eyes?Copy !req
240. - I love surprises.
- Okay...Copy !req
241. Ta-da!Copy !req
242. Surprise!Copy !req
243. - Oh, that guy.
- Guillermo.Copy !req
244. - Oh.
- Right.Copy !req
245. How could you ship me
across the AtlanticCopy !req
246. in a wooden crate?
Twice!Copy !req
247. Always a complaint
with this one.Copy !req
248. I packed you extra Oreos
and Pedialyte this time around,Copy !req
249. - just to be nice.
- I've been pounding
from the insideCopy !req
250. of this wooden crate for a week!Copy !req
251. Oh! That's what it was.Copy !req
252. If I'd have known that, I
wouldn't have trashed the place.Copy !req
253. Good news is pipes are fine.Copy !req
254. - That is good news.Copy !req
255. Okay, something
is happening now.Copy !req
256. I think he's going to make
a poop in his knickers.Copy !req
257. - That, or he's about to
start crying.
- Guillermo.Copy !req
258. If you want to cry, that's fine,
we won't judge you.Copy !req
259. But if you wish
to poop your pants,Copy !req
260. then I'd rather you
go somewhere else and do it.Copy !req
261. - You're dead to me.
- Ah.Copy !req
262. - You're dead to me.
- Uh...Copy !req
263. - You're dead to me!
- The fuck did I do?Copy !req
264. Hm. Well, technically,Copy !req
265. we're all already dead, so...Copy !req
266. - Nad... Nadja,Copy !req
267. that is not helpful
at this particular juncture.Copy !req
268. - Goodbye for... Aah!
- Whoa!Copy !req
269. - Guillermo, I'm coming!Copy !req
270. Oh, shit.Copy !req
271. Is he dead?Copy !req
272. Oh.Copy !req
273. - Bloody hell.Copy !req
274. - Well, he needed a bath.
- Agreed.Copy !req
275. - Charming.
- That's better.Copy !req
276. There we go.Copy !req
277. How we feeling?Copy !req
278. - I'm fine.
- Mm.Copy !req
279. I've had a lot of time
to think about my life lately,Copy !req
280. while I was nailed
inside a shipping crateCopy !req
281. for two weeks.Copy !req
282. I got to start
looking out for number one.Copy !req
283. That-that would be me.Copy !req
284. In this case,
I'm num-I'm number one.Copy !req
285. How's about I fix you up
some, uh...Copy !req
286. Glass of water, please.Copy !req
287. Glass of water, coming up.Copy !req
288. I know that you want to leave,
Guillermo.Copy !req
289. You feel disrespected.Copy !req
290. Much in the same way,Copy !req
291. you disrespected me
by leaving me all aloneCopy !req
292. at a train station in New Jersey
with my dick in my hand.Copy !req
293. - That wasn't my fault.
- Agree to disagree.Copy !req
294. Anyway, that was in the past
now, and I forgive you.Copy !req
295. And also, I need you to stayCopy !req
296. - and do something very important
for me.Copy !req
297. Well...Copy !req
298. - what is it?
- It's not...Copy !req
299. easy thing for
an ancient warrior to ask.Copy !req
300. Guillermo de la Cruz.Copy !req
301. Did I say it right?Copy !req
302. - Yes.
- Once my familiar,Copy !req
303. also my bodyguard,
always my friend.Copy !req
304. Based on definition of the word.Copy !req
305. - You could've stopped there.
- Would youCopy !req
306. do me the great honorCopy !req
307. of being...Copy !req
308. the best man at my wedding?Copy !req
309. - You're getting married?
- Yes. Now, don't be jealous.Copy !req
310. I'm actually not.Copy !req
311. - Oh. Okay.
- I'm really happy for you.Copy !req
312. I will accept this great honor.Copy !req
313. Great. Good.Copy !req
314. I'm still looking outCopy !req
315. for number one, I'll just beCopy !req
316. Nandor's best man first.Copy !req
317. One could argue that
it's way coolerCopy !req
318. to be made into a best man
than into a vampire.Copy !req
319. Don't know
who would say that, but...Copy !req
320. one could argue that.Copy !req
321. So, who is she?Copy !req
322. - Who is who?
- Your bride-to-be?Copy !req
323. - I don't know yet.
- What?Copy !req
324. I have not picked one.Copy !req
325. You haven't picked one?Copy !req
326. I have been very lonely,Copy !req
327. and the obvious fix is
to take a bride immediately,Copy !req
328. preferably before
the end of the month.Copy !req
329. - This seems a bit hasty.
- Thank you.Copy !req
330. And you are going to help me
pick my bride,Copy !req
331. because that is
what a best man does.Copy !req
332. Actually, that's not
what a best man does.Copy !req
333. - What a best man does is...Copy !req
334. What the fuck is that?Copy !req
335. Oh, this is the creature that
crawled out of the chest cavityCopy !req
336. of Colin Robinson's dead body
after he died.Copy !req
337. Why does it have a lit candle
on its head?Copy !req
338. He could catch on fire or
catch this whole place on fire.Copy !req
339. - Ah, there he is.Copy !req
340. - Yes.
- I found him.
- Okay, I found him.Copy !req
341. - He's giving me
sweet little kisses.
- No, my darling.Copy !req
342. I don't know what you've got
out there, but he's in here.Copy !req
343. Oh, okay. Never mind.Copy !req
344. - It's just another raccoon.Copy !req
345. Okay. He hasCopy !req
346. the candle on his head
for when he sneaksCopy !req
347. down to the basement
and swims in all the sewage.Copy !req
348. - It's very dark down there.
- What?Copy !req
349. You let him swim in the sewage?Copy !req
350. It helps him
shake off the sillies.Copy !req
351. Now, I have a little boyCopy !req
352. who needs feeding.Copy !req
353. There you are.Copy !req
354. You like these, don't you?Copy !req
355. Are you ready?
Here we go.Copy !req
356. - Yum, yum, yum,
yum, yum, yum.Copy !req
357. - No.
- Now, sit.Copy !req
358. Stay, boy.Copy !req
359. And... have at it.Copy !req
360. Just can't leave
that innocent kidCopy !req
361. in this death trap of a house
with those lunatics.Copy !req
362. My mom worked a lot
when I was little.Copy !req
363. So I had to take care of myself
a lot, and it was hard.Copy !req
364. And no kid shouldCopy !req
365. have to go through that.Copy !req
366. I'm gonna just focus on me.Copy !req
367. Me first. Me.Copy !req
368. You're looking at a brand-new
Guillermo de la Cruz.Copy !req
369. After I take care of the weddingCopy !req
370. and make sure
that child doesn't die.Copy !req
371. This is my favorite part
right here...Copy !req
372. So, Guillermo
has made a good point.Copy !req
373. - Hmm.
- That we should probably make
some concrete stepsCopy !req
374. into fixing this house,Copy !req
375. because it has become
a mortal danger for usCopy !req
376. and also for
the little creatureCopy !req
377. - You mean the baby?
- that clawed its way out ofCopy !req
378. the chest of the corpse of
our dead friend, Colin Robinson.Copy !req
379. Which is what we are doing.Copy !req
380. I'm sorry, but I don't know
how watching 15 episodesCopy !req
381. of these two dimwits
installing kitchen islandsCopy !req
382. in other people's homes
is going to help usCopy !req
383. - fix our house.
- Yep.
- My darling,Copy !req
384. Bran and Toby are brothers
with a keen eyeCopy !req
385. on interior decor.Copy !req
386. They turn
the most mundane propertyCopy !req
387. from shabby, uh, to chic.Copy !req
388. - Tell 'em we're gonna need
a structural engineer,Copy !req
389. a team of contractors,
and at least two plumbers.Copy !req
390. Guillermo said that
we're gonna need a structural...Copy !req
391. - Yeah, we heard him, you prat.
- Yes, he's sitting right there.Copy !req
392. Guillermo has decidedCopy !req
393. that he's no longer
talking to you bothCopy !req
394. because of the bad way
you have treated himCopy !req
395. - over the last 12 years.
- Ooh.Copy !req
396. A bit of sass from the boy.Copy !req
397. Okay, now we are all
friends again,Copy !req
398. and we are breaking
each other's balls.Copy !req
399. - No, that's really not
what's going on here.
- Well, to fixCopy !req
400. this house,
we need money, correct?Copy !req
401. Does anyone know
if we have any money?Copy !req
402. - Anyone? Cash.
- Uh...Copy !req
403. - Coin. Gold.
- Moola. Wonga.Copy !req
404. - Rubles. Lettuce. Dough.
- Milk. Bread.Copy !req
405. - Sweet cream.
- stripper tips.Copy !req
406. - Anyone?
- Colin Robinson
was in chargeCopy !req
407. of paying all the bills
in the house,Copy !req
408. and now Colin Robinson is dead.Copy !req
409. - No, he's not.
He's right over...Copy !req
410. Oh, no, no, Colin. Colin!Copy !req
411. No, Colin. No, no, no.Copy !req
412. That is not Colin Robinson,
so...Copy !req
413. - Yes, it is.
- No, it's not.Copy !req
414. It came from Colin Robinson, but
don't call him Colin Robinson.Copy !req
415. - Have a seat, right here.
- I do have
Colin Robinson'sCopy !req
416. automated teller machine card.Copy !req
417. - Ooh.
- But what I don't have,
I'm afraid, is Colin Robinson'sCopy !req
418. automated teller machine card
password.Copy !req
419. - Any ideas?Copy !req
420. You can't be that stupid,
can you? Just give me that.Copy !req
421. - Ooh.Copy !req
422. This boy's grown some claws.Copy !req
423. Hey, buddy. I'm Guillermo.Copy !req
424. - What's your name?
- Colin.Copy !req
425. Oh, no, no, no, no.Copy !req
426. The only reason
why he said that isCopy !req
427. 'cause he's heard you say Colin
many times.Copy !req
428. Okay. Hey, buddy.Copy !req
429. Do you know the password
to this card?Copy !req
430. - Three.
- Three. Can we get
a-a piece of paper and pen?Copy !req
431. - Good job. Very good.
- My quill, my quill.Copy !req
432. - Three-three. What else?
- Three, yes.Copy !req
433. - One.
- One.
- One.Copy !req
434. - Hang on.
- Four.
- Four.Copy !req
435. - Four.
- Anything else,
Colin?Copy !req
436. - One.
- One.
- One.Copy !req
437. This is quite miraculous.Copy !req
438. Four. Three.Copy !req
439. - One. Zero. Two.
- At least I tried.Copy !req
440. - Bloody waste of time.Copy !req
441. Do you know what could be
a very good moneymaker?Copy !req
442. Opening up
our own vampire nightclub.Copy !req
443. Ooh, yes, a great idea.Copy !req
444. - A what?
- A vampire nightclub.Copy !req
445. Like in the film Blade,Copy !req
446. with the blood sprinklersCopy !req
447. and the live F and S show.Copy !req
448. - Imagine!
- I got it.Copy !req
449. We rob Fort Knox.Copy !req
450. Guillermo, I am going to need
600 yards of strong rope.Copy !req
451. Why would you need
that much rope?Copy !req
452. - You got any better ideas?
- Uh, I just said one.Copy !req
453. - She just said one.
- Well, if you two
are consideringCopy !req
454. selling my TV projector monitor,
then you can get fucked.Copy !req
455. - Hmm.
- The new series of
Go Flip YourselfCopy !req
456. starts next week,Copy !req
457. where Bran and Toby face
their biggest challenges yet.Copy !req
458. - Hmm.
- Guys, could we circle back?Copy !req
459. I'm telling you,
the nightclub business—Copy !req
460. - it is a cash-only business.
- I've got it.Copy !req
461. We break into
Henry Ford's house,Copy !req
462. - Oh...
- and we steal all his money.Copy !req
463. Guillermo, I'm just gonna need
ten yards of strong rope.Copy !req
464. I did learn threeCopy !req
465. very valuable lessons
on my trip to England.Copy !req
466. Number one, if you go to workCopy !req
467. for the Supreme Worldwide
Vampiric Council,Copy !req
468. do not let themCopy !req
469. put you on a ten-year
Vampiric Planning Committee,Copy !req
470. 'cause that is
where they just stickCopy !req
471. Z-list and C-list vampires
to just sit around,Copy !req
472. talking about boring admin
all day.Copy !req
473. And that is why the focus
of our five-year planCopy !req
474. should be to form a varietyCopy !req
475. of subcommittees
and study groups...Copy !req
476. And the second thing
I learned is,Copy !req
477. as a woman,
sometimes you do needCopy !req
478. to use your special voice
to be heard.Copy !req
479. I was too afraid to use mine in
the Vampiric Council meetings,Copy !req
480. and I deeply regret that.Copy !req
481. Unless anyone has
anything else, I think we can...Copy !req
482. If I could?Copy !req
483. I have prepared a little pitch.Copy !req
484. Another way we could
possibly go with our...Copy !req
485. - five-year plan.Copy !req
486. I have just two words for you.Copy !req
487. Vampire nightclub.Copy !req
488. And that's
the other thing I learned.Copy !req
489. I just really want to open
a vampiric nightclub!Copy !req
490. I mean, come on.Copy !req
491. It's a no-brainer.Copy !req
492. Oh, Nadja, every new vampire
comes up with this idea,Copy !req
493. and it's not what we do here.Copy !req
494. Oh.Copy !req
495. Okay.Copy !req
496. Thank you for your time.Copy !req
497. And so that is when
I decided to quitCopy !req
498. the Worldwide Supreme
Vampiric Council and come home.Copy !req
499. Okay, this is ridiculous.
You're all vampires.Copy !req
500. Just go to the bank
and hypnotize the teller...Copy !req
501. Enough!Copy !req
502. - Whoa!
- Whoa!
- Shit!Copy !req
503. - Whoa!Copy !req
504. I am telling you, we are going
to open a vampire nightclub.Copy !req
505. - Any questions?
- Works for me.
- Fine and dandy by this boy.Copy !req
506. What?Copy !req
507. So, was it great being back homeCopy !req
508. in Al Qolnidar?Copy !req
509. No, it was not.Copy !req
510. I returned back to my village,Copy !req
511. and it was exactly
how I left it,Copy !req
512. except everyone
had become vampires.Copy !req
513. So, wasn't it nice
to be among your own kind?Copy !req
514. I hated it.Copy !req
515. If everyone is a vampire,Copy !req
516. there's nothing special
about being a vampire.Copy !req
517. It was not good
for my mental health.Copy !req
518. - Are you two tits coming
or what?
- Yes,Copy !req
519. yes. There's no need to shout.Copy !req
520. - Oh.
- Oh...Copy !req
521. Hello?Copy !req
522. - Guillermo, get the lights.
- Guillermo,Copy !req
523. - get the lights.
- Gizmo, get the lights.Copy !req
524. Why do I have to still do it?Copy !req
525. Oh.Copy !req
526. - There you are.
- Shit.Copy !req
527. What the hell are you doing?Copy !req
528. Just sitting here, waiting
for you guys to come back.Copy !req
529. - For a year?
- What? A year?Copy !req
530. - Oh, wow.Copy !req
531. Guess I was just so afraid
if I got up,Copy !req
532. that would be the moment
you would come in.Copy !req
533. You know? So I just waited.Copy !req
534. Well...Copy !req
535. We have a lot of Council
business to catch up on, huh?Copy !req
536. Actually, no.
No more business as usual.Copy !req
537. - Change of direction.
- Oh, that's something
I really enjoy.Copy !req
538. - I'll tell you what it is.
- Okay.Copy !req
539. We are opening a motherfucking
vampire nightclub, baby!Copy !req
540. Cool. Where?Copy !req
541. Here.Copy !req
542. Yes.Copy !req
543. - No.
- Yes.Copy !req
544. We are opening
a vampire nightclub.Copy !req
545. And if any of you motherfuckers
get in my way,Copy !req
546. you will surely
live to regret it!Copy !req