1. - (owl hooting)Copy !req
2. Yeah.Copy !req
3. Get it, son.Copy !req
4. Aah!Copy !req
5. - (growling)
- (gasping, grunting)Copy !req
6. - What the blazes?
You've got to be kidding.
- I didn't say anything.Copy !req
7. - Please, just...
- Shut up. I'm not talking
to you, jogger man.Copy !req
8. What was the name of that song?Copy !req
9. - (mumbles): "Come On Eileen."
- Speak up.Copy !req
10. "Come On Eileen."Copy !req
11. - From when?
- 1982, maybe?Copy !req
12. Like hell it was.Copy !req
13. - ♪♪ Come on Eileen... ♪♪
- I've been robbed. I say robbed!Copy !req
14. - NANDOR:
What is the great emergency?
- Shush.Copy !req
15. Someone has stolen one
of Laszlo's songs that he wrote.Copy !req
16. - Did you really write
"Come On Eileen"?
- Yes, I did.Copy !req
17. I wrote this melody in 1852.Copy !req
18. It was called "Chum on Irene."Copy !req
19. An ode to the local
fishmonger's missus, Irene.Copy !req
20. Charming lady. My darling, will
you tell him to turn that off?Copy !req
21. - Silence this machine.
- (music stops)Copy !req
22. I've been shit on
from a great height.Copy !req
23. - (doorbell rings)
- And it's not the first time.
- Tell them aboutCopy !req
24. - "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow."
- I wrote that song.Copy !req
25. "For I Am a Jolly Good Fellow."Copy !req
26. That's what it was
originally called.Copy !req
27. I'm. Not he or she. I'm.Copy !req
28. - Hello.
- Greetings.Copy !req
29. Is Nandor at home?Copy !req
30. Maybe.
Who are you?Copy !req
31. I'm his familiar, Benjy Everett.Copy !req
32. Nandor's gonna make me
a vampire.Copy !req
33. Such a wonderful surprise.Copy !req
34. - It's...
- (whispers): Benjy.Copy !req
35. Benjy.Copy !req
36. - How long has it been?
- 40 years, Master.Copy !req
37. 40 years.
Wow,Copy !req
38. you haven't aged a bit.Copy !req
39. Benjy was my familiarCopy !req
40. for a time during the 1970s.Copy !req
41. He was fine,
but he was quite vocalCopy !req
42. about his desire
to become a vampire.Copy !req
43. So irritating.Copy !req
44. I couldn't take it anymore,Copy !req
45. so I hypnotized him
to forget about us here.Copy !req
46. Then I left himCopy !req
47. in a rest stop.Copy !req
48. In Delaware.Copy !req
49. Don't feel bad for me.Copy !req
50. - I don't.
- I've had an outstanding life.Copy !req
51. Got to thank my missus for that.Copy !req
52. - Paula saved me.
She found me wandering around
- Aw.Copy !req
53. at a rest stop in Delaware,Copy !req
54. high on drugs, talking ragtime.Copy !req
55. She got me cleaned up.Copy !req
56. Helped me land a job
in the insurance game.Copy !req
57. That's a fantastic industry.Copy !req
58. But how did you find your way
back here?Copy !req
59. Paula got me to try Lumosity.Copy !req
60. Keep the brain sharp.Copy !req
61. This is a herb or elixir?Copy !req
62. - It's an app on the phone, Ma...
- Shh. Let him talk.Copy !req
63. It's an app on the phone.Copy !req
64. After about a week on it,
all theseCopy !req
65. memories came flooding back,Copy !req
66. - Aw, shit. Mm.
- Staten Island,Copy !req
67. Nandor, Laszlo...Copy !req
68. - Memories.
- Nadja,Copy !req
69. that Dilbert-looking guy?Copy !req
70. Colin Robinson.Copy !req
71. That's when I realized—
Nandor,Copy !req
72. you son of a bitch.Copy !req
73. You were testing me.Copy !req
74. Yes.Copy !req
75. I'm ready to be a vampire.Copy !req
76. Congratulations.Copy !req
77. But first, Benjy, you must rest.Copy !req
78. Guillermo,
show Benjy to the, uh,Copy !req
79. - big room.
- Oh, I know the way.Copy !req
80. This place
hasn't changed at all.Copy !req
81. Ah! Here's another one
that was cruelly stolen from me.Copy !req
82. Now sung in every schoolyard
across the land.Copy !req
83. But this is the original.Copy !req
84. What I love about it is
you wouldn't expect itCopy !req
85. to rhyme "cream" with "cream."Copy !req
86. My Laszlo has alwaysCopy !req
87. been quite musical.Copy !req
88. It's true,
I can play anything,Copy !req
89. I don't give a monkey's.Copy !req
90. Whether it's
a three-way plunk box,Copy !req
91. - Antoine Sax's
metallic clarinet,
- NADJA: Oh, yes.Copy !req
92. - or the chimp grinder's
wind piano.
- NADJA: Mm.Copy !req
93. But I'll tell you this,
my luck changedCopy !req
94. the night I met Nadja,Copy !req
95. for she is
an exquisite lyricist.Copy !req
96. Guilty, Your Honor.Copy !req
97. Send me down.Copy !req
98. See?Copy !req
99. Laszlo, I love this one.
Shall we do it?Copy !req
100. Hi.Copy !req
101. - LASZLO: What do you want?
- That sounded great.Copy !req
102. Have you ever thought
of maybe performing live?Copy !req
103. Kind of a "300 Years
of Great Music"?Copy !req
104. But no one has even heard
most of these songs.Copy !req
105. "Witches Are Snitches."Copy !req
106. "Horse-Drawn Carriage
Full of Ass."Copy !req
107. "Wannabe."Copy !req
108. If you want, I can
put out some feelers.Copy !req
109. Well, if you can sort out
a concert, we might turn up.Copy !req
110. I'll see what I can do, daddy-o.Copy !req
111. - Rock on.
- Yeah.
- Okay.Copy !req
112. Nothing unlocks
anger and boredomCopy !req
113. - (Nadja singing in distance)
- quite like old-timey music.Copy !req
114. (giggles):
I'm excited.Copy !req
115. Wow.Copy !req
116. Can you believe
I slept in this closetCopy !req
117. ten years?Copy !req
118. That's my old pillow.Copy !req
119. God, I used to beat off
into that thing every night.Copy !req
120. - Oh, not that pillow.
- Definitely that one.Copy !req
121. Same sheets, too.Copy !req
122. Hey, can I come to the familiar
mixer with you tonight?Copy !req
123. - Yeah, sure.
- My last chance to kick up
my heels as a familiarCopy !req
124. before they make me a vampire.Copy !req
125. Thank you, Guillermo.Copy !req
126. It's a lot livelier
than I remember.Copy !req
127. What?Copy !req
128. - Freddy? Benjy Everett.
- Benjy. Ah.Copy !req
129. I guess these mixers
started as a way for familiarsCopy !req
130. to network
and exchange work techniques,Copy !req
131. but it's mostly bitching.Copy !req
132. And sad hookups.Copy !req
133. My vampire let me drive here,Copy !req
134. so if you
need a ride anywhere,Copy !req
135. - or if you just want to,
like, sit and chat or...
- Aw...Copy !req
136. - whatever...
- Is that Celeste?Copy !req
137. - I'm gonna go say hi.
- You know, you don't even
have to do anything, you know.Copy !req
138. So she was like, "Screw it,Copy !req
139. I'm just gonna
make you a vampire." (laughs)Copy !req
140. - BRAD: Did it hurt?
- Yes. It did.Copy !req
141. - Hey, Celeste.
- CELESTE: It did.Copy !req
142. (gasps)
Hi!Copy !req
143. - Elmo!
- Guillermo.Copy !req
144. - Hello.
- (chuckles)Copy !req
145. Celeste was a familiar
that I used to help outCopy !req
146. when she had too many bodies
that she couldn't get rid of.Copy !req
147. Her master was
a 12-year-old girl.Copy !req
148. She's been 12 for 150 years.Copy !req
149. I'd say her job
hasn't been easy.Copy !req
150. She's paid her dues, and...Copy !req
151. she's a vampire now.Copy !req
152. I am so...Copy !req
153. happy for her.Copy !req
154. That's so cool
that you are now a...Copy !req
155. Are... Is that real...Copy !req
156. blood?Copy !req
157. I vape it.
Delicious.Copy !req
158. I mean, it's delicious to me,
now that I'm a vampire,Copy !req
159. - but you'd probably hate it.
- Probably like it if I was.Copy !req
160. No.
It's not for you.Copy !req
161. You'd be like...
(coughing)Copy !req
162. Hey, you're still working
for Nandor, right?Copy !req
163. Uh, I've been there
11 years, so...Copy !req
164. 11 years?
(hisses)Copy !req
165. Wow. Well, I'm not
doing it like that.Copy !req
166. I've promised all of my
familiars that they'll beCopy !req
167. vampires within eight months,
maximum.Copy !req
168. - Eight months?
- I'm buildingCopy !req
169. a vampire community.Copy !req
170. We will have vampire music,
vampire dance,Copy !req
171. vampire origami,Copy !req
172. - vampire maths.
- Wow.Copy !req
173. Are you fully staffed, or do...Copy !req
174. Oh, I don't poach.
Vampire code.Copy !req
175. I mean, my door's always open.Copy !req
176. But you have to be free and
clear of your current master.Copy !req
177. - So it's really up to you.
- Celeste.Copy !req
178. Sorry.
This-this is Karen.Copy !req
179. - Karen is, like,
dying to meet you.
- Hi, I'm Karen.Copy !req
180. - She's, like, a big fan.
- I'm so interested in your work.
- Dying to meet me.Copy !req
181. - Dying to meet you.
- Sorry.
- BENJY: I know it's gonnaCopy !req
182. happen to me.
I know I'm gonna be a vampire.Copy !req
183. - I can feel it.
It's gonna happen.
- Wait, wait. Benjy. Benjy.Copy !req
184. Benjy. Benjy.
I think I'm up first,Copy !req
185. 'cause I've been around
a lot longer than you.Copy !req
186. - Okay.
- You know.Copy !req
187. - What? What's wrong?
- Nothing.Copy !req
188. I like the end of that one,Copy !req
189. I just feel like we're trying
to be too contemporary.Copy !req
190. Oh, my darling, all of our
greatest hits have been songsCopy !req
191. that really captured the spirit
of the time, like, um,Copy !req
192. - the one about the Olympics.
- Oh, yes.Copy !req
193. I'm not sure that's aged well.Copy !req
194. You know what?Copy !req
195. If we slide your coffin
over a little,Copy !req
196. we could put my coffin
right next to it.Copy !req
197. Yes, I'll get
right on that, Benjy.Copy !req
198. - (sighs)
- (knocking)Copy !req
199. Excuse me, Master,
may I speak with you in private?Copy !req
200. I would like that.
Uh, Benjy?Copy !req
201. Leave us.
This sounds important.Copy !req
202. - I got to take a leak, anyway.
- You do that.Copy !req
203. (sighs)
Thank you for that, Guillermo.Copy !req
204. Are there any places in AmericaCopy !req
205. that are further away
than Delaware?Copy !req
206. Yes, of course, but I need
to speak to you about something.Copy !req
207. - It's personal.
- Oh, no.Copy !req
208. No, it's okay, Guillermo.
You really don't have to.Copy !req
209. If it's difficult to say,
it's probably best...Copy !req
210. - Take a seat, Master.
- Oh... shit.Copy !req
211. Master, are you planning
on making me a vampire?Copy !req
212. Are you bullshitting me on this?Copy !req
213. How is it that nowCopy !req
214. everyone thinks
they can be a vampire?Copy !req
215. I told you before,
we'll talk about it later.Copy !req
216. You always want to talk
about it later. Well, what ifCopy !req
217. I have a better offer
right now? Hmm?Copy !req
218. - What, right now?
- Yes.Copy !req
219. (snorts)
Then you should take it.Copy !req
220. What?Copy !req
221. You should take it.Copy !req
222. Well, then, I will.Copy !req
223. - Okay, then do.
- Okay, then, I will.Copy !req
224. Okay, then, you should.Copy !req
225. - Then I'll take it. Okay.
- Okay, go.Copy !req
226. Great.Copy !req
227. Well... are you...Copy !req
228. are you gonna be
all right without me?Copy !req
229. Yes, I'll be fine.Copy !req
230. Thankfully, Benjy has returned,Copy !req
231. and BenjyCopy !req
232. is the best familiar
I've ever had.Copy !req
233. So everything will be okay-A.Copy !req
234. A-okay.Copy !req
235. O-A-kay.Copy !req
236. A-okay.Copy !req
237. As I said.Copy !req
238. Well, thank you.
I learned a lot from you.Copy !req
239. (mutters):
You're being stupid.Copy !req
240. What was that?Copy !req
241. Uh, nothing.Copy !req
242. I didn't say anything.Copy !req
243. Okay, then.Copy !req
244. I treatedCopy !req
245. Guillermo like a son,Copy !req
246. and this is how he repays me?Copy !req
247. I held that little guy
in my armsCopy !req
248. so he could pretend to fly.Copy !req
249. Disrespected, unappreciated,Copy !req
250. overlooked.Copy !req
251. I made him some kindCopy !req
252. of glitter picture
on his birthday.Copy !req
253. I did all kinds of shitCopy !req
254. for him that I can't even
think of right now.Copy !req
255. So that's whyCopy !req
256. I can't be here anymore.Copy !req
257. Listen to me, little man.Copy !req
258. From Panera Bread you came,Copy !req
259. and to Panera Bread
you shall return.Copy !req
260. Hello?Copy !req
261. - (gasps)
- Hi.Copy !req
262. Guillermo!Copy !req
263. (hisses)
Come in.Copy !req
264. Mwah.
You brought friends.Copy !req
265. Ah. Hello.
(laughs)Copy !req
266. Wow.Copy !req
267. Welcome. Come in.Copy !req
268. Does your master stillCopy !req
269. - live here with you?
- Ugh, no.Copy !req
270. Houston and her clique are down
in Florida hunting pervs.Copy !req
271. - Cool.
- Everyone,
let's welcome Guillermo.Copy !req
272. - Hi, Guillermo.
- Hi.Copy !req
273. - (cat meows)
- And you know Sam, of course?Copy !req
274. Oh, yeah. Hey, what's up, Sam?Copy !req
275. His familiar skills
are just unreal.Copy !req
276. He did all of this himself.Copy !req
277. The plating, the charcuterie.
Can you imagine?Copy !req
278. With those little paws.
He's a genius.Copy !req
279. - Oh.
- Sit.Copy !req
280. Welcome, everyone.Copy !req
281. Your presence is a blessing
and a privilege.Copy !req
282. So I just have a few rules.Copy !req
283. Number one, listen.Copy !req
284. Because we are here to grow.Copy !req
285. - Yes, Master.
- No "master." I don't believe
in that bullshit.Copy !req
286. We don't do that here.Copy !req
287. It's okay, you're new.
And one final thing.Copy !req
288. Since Guillermo was
the last one here,Copy !req
289. it's his turn
to go get the Shake Shack.Copy !req
290. - Really? Shake Shack?
- Yes.Copy !req
291. - What should I get?
- Get Shake Shack.Copy !req
292. - Shake Shack for everyone.
- Yeah.Copy !req
293. - (laughing)
- CELESTE: Hurry.Copy !req
294. Let's take this furniture
outside.Copy !req
295. - I don't like it anymore.
- Okay. Totally.Copy !req
296. Anytime tomorrow, Benjy.Copy !req
297. I'm sorry. I tweaked
the old back last weekCopy !req
298. - playing golf with the grandson.
- I'm not interested.Copy !req
299. Might be easier if I just
go get you a new pair.Copy !req
300. - Do you have five bucks?
- That's not what
shoes cost anymore.Copy !req
301. What happened to those
white platform shoes?Copy !req
302. - I gave them away to a homeless.
- You looked so tall in them.Copy !req
303. - Well, they were stupid.
- So, what do you boogie in?Copy !req
304. - I...
- You can't boogie in these.Copy !req
305. I don't boogie.Copy !req
306. - Nobody boogies anymore.
- Oh.Copy !req
307. - What are you doing?
- You got me thinkingCopy !req
308. about playing golf
with my grandson.Copy !req
309. - (groans)
- You got to see this kid.Copy !req
310. He swings a club
like a young Tiger...Copy !req
311. - Tiger.
- Tiger Woods.Copy !req
312. Tiger Woods.
That's the fella.Copy !req
313. I don't even know
what "jolf" is,Copy !req
314. but I know his name
is Tiger Woods.Copy !req
315. Where the hell's his picture?Copy !req
316. That's my finger.
That's my finger.Copy !req
317. That's my finger.Copy !req
318. No.
Laszlo, it is too fast.Copy !req
319. - It has to have a ballad tempo.
- No, it doesn't.Copy !req
320. You seem to forget
that I am the tempo king.Copy !req
321. Oh, well, Your Majesty, please,
may I take some tea with youCopy !req
322. and ask you to slow it down?Copy !req
323. Nadja, if we slowed this down,
it would stop forever and a day.Copy !req
324. I am now remembering whyCopy !req
325. me and Laszlo haven't
collaborated in decades.Copy !req
326. Because sometimes he can be
a giant dipshit with no taste.Copy !req
327. She does have a way with words,Copy !req
328. but sometimes those words
drive me fucking insane.Copy !req
329. You haven't hadCopy !req
330. an original idea since 1925,
when you decidedCopy !req
331. to go down on me
for the first time in 200 years.Copy !req
332. - Biggest mistake I ever made.
- (gasps)Copy !req
333. You said I tasted
like goats' cheese.Copy !req
334. Anyway, how dare you?Copy !req
335. I was doing the bloody discoCopy !req
336. a hundred years
before any other fucker.Copy !req
337. I gave you that idea.
Colin Robinson,Copy !req
338. this is a private conversation.Copy !req
339. Sorry, I-I just
wanted to pop in and sayCopy !req
340. - be sure you do some new songs.
- Why?Copy !req
341. Every time I go to a rock
concert and the singer says,Copy !req
342. "Okay, we're gonna take a break
from the hits and doCopy !req
343. some of our new material,"
the crowd goes bananas.Copy !req
344. - (grunting)
- NANDOR: I have been wonderingCopy !req
345. if perhaps I was
a little too relentlessCopy !req
346. with Guillermo.Copy !req
347. Get out of the way.Copy !req
348. Like all humans
approaching death,Copy !req
349. Benjy is mostly interested
in "jolf".Copy !req
350. - Watch the hips.
- Uh, yeah. Okay.Copy !req
351. Shoot...
Chop that thing!Copy !req
352. He's not as strong
as Guillermo,Copy !req
353. nor as quick.Copy !req
354. He's frail,Copy !req
355. like a baby.Copy !req
356. A big, wrinkly babyCopy !req
357. that smells ofCopy !req
358. mashed potatoes.Copy !req
359. Let me do it.Copy !req
360. Sorry, Master. I'll be stronger
when I'm a vampire.Copy !req
361. So I think I'll pay
Guillermo a visit.Copy !req
362. Watch out, there's a slippy bit.Copy !req
363. He must be dying
to come back by now.Copy !req
364. - Do you like my room?
- Uh, yes.Copy !req
365. It's very nice.
Big.Copy !req
366. - Is that me?
- No.Copy !req
367. - That's me.
- Nope.Copy !req
368. That's you.Copy !req
369. That's not...Copy !req
370. If I knew you liked
big rooms, you know,Copy !req
371. maybe I could've moved you
into the big blue roomCopy !req
372. - upstairs in Staten Island.
- No.Copy !req
373. I don't need more room
at that house.Copy !req
374. You know, Celeste always comes
in here and just talks.Copy !req
375. Well, I like just talking, too.Copy !req
376. - Since when?
- Since...Copy !req
377. - Since...
- Okay.Copy !req
378. I'm gonna go see what
everyone else is doing.Copy !req
379. - But I thought we were
just talking.
- We're not talking.Copy !req
380. The fuck is that shit?Copy !req
381. Ah! And the couch
over here but upright,Copy !req
382. - because that's how I sleep now.
- Why are you being like this?Copy !req
383. - Come on.
- CELESTE:
All the young vampiresCopy !req
384. are switching to couches.Copy !req
385. These are my people now.Copy !req
386. Guillermo!
Come, practice.Copy !req
387. It's interpretive dance,Copy !req
388. so you need to be
telling a storyCopy !req
389. using your body.Copy !req
390. Like Pam.
Good luck.Copy !req
391. You don't need to be doing that.Copy !req
392. Yes, I do.Copy !req
393. Be kind to Guillermo.Copy !req
394. - CELESTE: What?
- Nothing.Copy !req
395. Sorry.
Can I get...Copy !req
396. You mind if I...
Just going to go this way.Copy !req
397. Fucking girl.Copy !req
398. Why is that when I eat M&M'S,Copy !req
399. M&M'S thinks
that I have to be horny?Copy !req
400. Worked better at the Cellar.
Okay.Copy !req
401. - Thank you so much...
- Colin Robinson,Copy !req
402. what is an open mic night?Copy !req
403. It's a prestigious showcase
of top-level talent.Copy !req
404. They call it "open mic" becauseCopy !req
405. they only open the mic
for the best of the best.Copy !req
406. - Naturally.
- So, we're gonna
switch things upCopy !req
407. with a little bit of music
for you right now.Copy !req
408. Coming at you from the deepest
part of Staten Island,Copy !req
409. - let's give a warm
Chop House welcome to...
- Oh.Copy !req
410. - ... Lass...
- LASZLO: Laszlo, dickhead.Copy !req
411. Lassezlo und Nadia.Copy !req
412. Hello, everybody.Copy !req
413. I'm Nadja, and this is Laszlo,
and we are Nadja and Laszlo,Copy !req
414. the human music group.Copy !req
415. This is a love song
to my wife, Nadja.Copy !req
416. Ugh, the couch.Copy !req
417. I hate it now.Copy !req
418. Go. Fix it.Copy !req
419. Uh, Celeste?
Sorry to bug.Copy !req
420. You said you were gonna start
making us vampires, quote,Copy !req
421. "Hopefully within the week."
And that was last week.Copy !req
422. Is someone talking to me
right now?Copy !req
423. That's actually true.Copy !req
424. You did say that.
And I don't wantCopy !req
425. - to be a bugaboo.
- CELESTE: Bugaboo?Copy !req
426. But you know
what it's like for us.Copy !req
427. What is this, an ambush?Copy !req
428. Sort of, like, a timelineCopy !req
429. - would mean a l-lot.
- Okay.Copy !req
430. - Music!
- (music stops playing)Copy !req
431. I'm just making sure
that the vibeCopy !req
432. is right before I start
making all of you vamps.Copy !req
433. - Right?
- KAREN: Well,Copy !req
434. that's what you said last week.Copy !req
435. Yeah, I'm still not feeling
the vibe, Karen.Copy !req
436. Okay. We just needCopy !req
437. a change in energy. I think
it'll do us a lot of good.Copy !req
438. Right?
So, who's ready...Copy !req
439. for an orgy?Copy !req
440. Anyone?Copy !req
441. - Me.
- Anyone here?Copy !req
442. - I'll have an orgy.
- Yeah, I know you will.
- Let's go,Copy !req
443. - let's do it. Okay, let's do it.
- KAREN: Do you want to...
- GUILLERMO: No.Copy !req
444. This song
is called "Transformation."Copy !req
445. Boo.Copy !req
446. Prepare to orgy.Copy !req
447. Close your eyes,Copy !req
448. remember all of the criticismCopy !req
449. you had from me,
and just get rid of it.Copy !req
450. Get rid of it.
Throw it away.Copy !req
451. - (pounding on door)
- GIRL (in distance): Celeste!Copy !req
452. - Oh, my God.
- Why is the door locked?Copy !req
453. Oh, shit, they're back!Copy !req
454. You guys got to get the fuck
out of here!Copy !req
455. - Go! Go! Run!
- (indistinct chatter)Copy !req
456. Um, Master, uh, I thought
you wouldn't be back for, like,Copy !req
457. - another month.
- Do you have people over?Copy !req
458. - (snarls)
- You're not a real vampire,
are you?Copy !req
459. She was never gonna make me
a fucking vampire, okay?Copy !req
460. I just had to know
what it felt like.Copy !req
461. Welcome home, Master.Copy !req
462. I brought you these mortals.Copy !req
463. Are you pleased?
(screams)Copy !req
464. This next one is a favoriteCopy !req
465. of the fella
that my wife and I live with.Copy !req
466. He's called Nandor,Copy !req
467. and this is called
"Let's Do the Disco."Copy !req
468. - (audience booing)Copy !req
469. - ♪♪ Do the disco ♪♪
- Okay, get off the stage!Copy !req
470. - (screaming)
- Guillermo! Save Sam!Copy !req
471. Save Sam!Copy !req
472. Don't look back, Sam.
Don't look back.Copy !req
473. - (exclaims)
- (Sam meows)Copy !req
474. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.Copy !req
475. Hey, you can't do that!Copy !req
476. - Fuck you!
- (booing)Copy !req
477. - The show was going terribly.
- So,Copy !req
478. we played "The Seafaring Song"
from 1792.Copy !req
479. - (audience jeering)
- (clears throat)Copy !req
480. And that got themCopy !req
481. really going.Copy !req
482. - How do they know the words?
- No idea.Copy !req
483. - We killed.
- Well, we literally did.Copy !req
484. We killed some of them
at the end.Copy !req
485. Such a magical evening.Copy !req
486. - Run, Sam. Run!
- (meows)Copy !req
487. - Guillermo.
- (screams)Copy !req
488. I was at the orgy, and e...
and everyone was attacked,Copy !req
489. - and they're all dead.
- I don't want to know
about that.Copy !req
490. Stop gloating.
Very difficult for me to say,Copy !req
491. so just let me get this out.Copy !req
492. I know how happy you are
with this Celeste,Copy !req
493. but I have been very unhappy
since you left.Copy !req
494. I just want to know
what I can doCopy !req
495. to bring you back home.Copy !req
496. Oh.Copy !req
497. Well,Copy !req
498. I want to feel more respectedCopy !req
499. and appreciated.Copy !req
500. And I want a day off.Copy !req
501. - What, like, every year?
- No.Copy !req
502. - Celeste would give us
a day off each week.
- What?Copy !req
503. She dresses herself that day?Copy !req
504. Like some cave pig?Copy !req
505. Yeesh.Copy !req
506. - Okay, fine. Once a week.
- And better snacks.Copy !req
507. What's wrong with the ice chips?Copy !req
508. - Ice is not a snack.
- Disagree.Copy !req
509. But I'm not much of a snacker.Copy !req
510. Am I not a good familiar to you?Copy !req
511. You're a great familiar.Copy !req
512. Thank you. So you'll make me
into a vampire.Copy !req
513. - Did I promise that?
- You did.Copy !req
514. - 11 years ago.
- I don't... That's a long time.Copy !req
515. - That's a long time. You did.
- I... Did I really, though?Copy !req
516. - I may have been talking
in my sleep.
- 11 years. I've been hereCopy !req
517. - for 11 years, all right?
- Okay, well, you know...Copy !req
518. - You know,
maybe Celeste would want me.
- Okay, okay, fine.Copy !req
519. I promise.Copy !req
520. (sighs)
I can't say when, but...Copy !req
521. I will.
Okay?Copy !req
522. You want to come back or not?Copy !req
523. - That's not necessary.
- Oh. I thought...Copy !req
524. - I got a feeling
that it was okay.
- It's not.Copy !req
525. - I got you this.
- Aw.Copy !req
526. - It's for beating off purposes.
- Mm.Copy !req
527. - Wow.
- Come now, Guillermo.Copy !req
528. Assume the position.Copy !req
529. Ready?Copy !req
530. Aw.Copy !req
531. I'm not going back to get it.Copy !req
532. - BENJY: Where are we?
- NANDOR: I don't know.Copy !req
533. - But it's your home now.
- BENJY: Okay.Copy !req
534. Guillermo, step on it.Copy !req
535. You're just gonna
leave him here?Copy !req
536. - NANDOR: Drive.
- BENJY: Bye.Copy !req
537. Hey, look where you're going.Copy !req