1. It's nightfall.Copy !req
2. The job of a vampire's familiarCopy !req
3. is not an easy one.Copy !req
4. It's very dangerous.Copy !req
5. I mean, they are vampires,
after all.Copy !req
6. We can go in now.Copy !req
7. Good evening, Master.Copy !req
8. Guillermo?Copy !req
9. Yes, sir?Copy !req
10. - Is that you?
- Yes, Master.Copy !req
11. - Okay.
- Okay, Master.Copy !req
12. It's time to... rise.Copy !req
13. The... Okay.Copy !req
14. Guillermo, it is stuck.Copy !req
15. I think it is the latch.Copy !req
16. Being a vampire's familiarCopy !req
17. is like being a best friend.Copy !req
18. Who-Who's also a slave.Copy !req
19. - MAN: Guillermo, it's too loud.
- What?Copy !req
20. Tomorrow night marksCopy !req
21. the ten-year anniversary sinceCopy !req
22. I started working
for my Master.Copy !req
23. I think he's planning
something pretty special.Copy !req
24. I think he's gonna
make me a vampire.Copy !req
25. This is very embarrassing.Copy !req
26. Okay, Master.Copy !req
27. He awakens.Copy !req
28. Very cool, Master.Copy !req
29. Very scary.Copy !req
30. Thank you.Copy !req
31. Everyone?Copy !req
32. Nadja, Laszlo.Copy !req
33. - Yeah?
- Yes?
- Can you come downstairsCopy !req
34. for a second, please?Copy !req
35. Thank you, Laszlo.Copy !req
36. In your own time, Nadja.Copy !req
37. Yes, good, excellent.Copy !req
38. So, listen.Copy !req
39. We have received a letterCopy !req
40. and I would like very much
to read it to you.Copy !req
41. - But not here, we want to go
into the library.
- Why not here?Copy !req
42. I'd like to read it in there.
It's just a formality.Copy !req
43. It'll sound
exactly the same if youCopy !req
44. read it here than if
you read it in there.Copy !req
45. I'm not going to disagree with
you, but that's not the point.Copy !req
46. I was a very ferocious soldierCopy !req
47. in the Ottoman Empire.Copy !req
48. Which meant a lot of killing,
lot of pillaging.Copy !req
49. People would say,
"Please, don't pillage me."Copy !req
50. And I would say, "No.Copy !req
51. I'm pillaging everyone,
you included."Copy !req
52. I was relentless.Copy !req
53. They would call me NandorCopy !req
54. the Relentless.Copy !req
55. Because I just never relent.Copy !req
56. So I'd like very much for us
to go into there, please.Copy !req
57. Just a formality.Copy !req
58. Come on, please,
it's just a formality.Copy !req
59. - You could have read it by now.
- Hmm.Copy !req
60. Just a formality, okay?
Look, it's not even that far.Copy !req
61. - Oh, fuck this, fine.
- Thank you, Laszlo.Copy !req
62. It's just a formality,
please, Nadja.Copy !req
63. - Just a formality, thank you.Copy !req
64. Guillermo, the door.Copy !req
65. - That wasn't so bad, was it?Copy !req
66. Now before we go into
the reading of the letter,Copy !req
67. I wanted to talk about
general hygiene in the cell.Copy !req
68. - Last night,Copy !req
69. there were all these people
down there,Copy !req
70. shouting and screaming,
half-drunk.Copy !req
71. Where did they find the alcohol?Copy !req
72. No, they were half-drunk.
They'd been half drunk.Copy !req
73. - Oh.
- Please, finish a whole victimCopy !req
74. before moving on
to a next one, okay?Copy !req
75. It's very unhygienic.Copy !req
76. I think I know who's leaving
them down there,Copy !req
77. - but I don't want to say.
- If you've got something to say,Copy !req
78. - then damn well say it.
- It's not hygienic.Copy !req
79. How dare you.Copy !req
80. The problems with living
with other vampiresCopy !req
81. are the vampires
I have chosen to stay with.Copy !req
82. Nandor is likeCopy !req
83. a big turkey
just walking aroundCopy !req
84. trying to control everything
on the farm.Copy !req
85. - Hyah!Copy !req
86. And Laszlo is my big, crazy,Copy !req
87. wild bear and we love to chase
each other around the house.Copy !req
88. - I ought to fucking kill you!Copy !req
89. We have a great time together.Copy !req
90. I was the most handsome manCopy !req
91. in our village.Copy !req
92. His village
was very badly affectedCopy !req
93. by leprosy and the plague.Copy !req
94. That's true.Copy !req
95. And I, myself,
did contract leprosy,Copy !req
96. but I was quite lucky
'cause it couldn't be seen.Copy !req
97. It was only one part
of my anatomy.Copy !req
98. Well, I can see it.Copy !req
99. Anyway, one night,Copy !req
100. I was awoken by this...Copy !req
101. horrible clawing at the window.Copy !req
102. And I thought,
"Who the hell is that?Copy !req
103. 'Cause I live
on the third floor."Copy !req
104. So I went to investigate it,
I threw back the curtain...Copy !req
105. Well, I saw the most beautiful
woman I had ever seen.Copy !req
106. But she was gripping the windowCopy !req
107. and she was clawing
at the glass.Copy !req
108. I was hypnotized.Copy !req
109. I used hypnosis on him.Copy !req
110. Which I found out later.Copy !req
111. Anyway,
obviously I invited her in.Copy !req
112. We were about to make loveCopy !req
113. when she turned into this
hideous, leathery bat thing.Copy !req
114. She drained me of my blood,Copy !req
115. giving me the curse
of eternal lifeCopy !req
116. and thus making me
a bloodthirstyCopy !req
117. creature of the night.Copy !req
118. Why don't we just
write on them with marker pen?Copy !req
119. Put our names and the date?Copy !req
120. Oh, that's a good suggestion.Copy !req
121. - NADJA: Yeah.
- Good idea, Nadja.Copy !req
122. Marker pens, Guillermo.Copy !req
123. Make sure they're permanent.Copy !req
124. - Sharpie.
- LASZLO: Genius.Copy !req
125. - NADJA: With date, as well.
- Yes, great thinking, Nadja.Copy !req
126. - And yes, this... yes.
- The name of the month,
day, year.Copy !req
127. Okay.Copy !req
128. And now we come...Copy !req
129. to the reading... of the letter.Copy !req
130. - At last.Copy !req
131. Guillermo? Close the door.Copy !req
132. - The door's closed, Master.
- Close it more.Copy !req
133. More.Copy !req
134. Good.Copy !req
135. - Now that we are
gathered here...Copy !req
136. together as one, finally,Copy !req
137. in accordance with
the protocols...Copy !req
138. Which you made up.Copy !req
139. Yes.Copy !req
140. We have received this letter.Copy !req
141. From Baron... Afanas.Copy !req
142. Really?Copy !req
143. Yes.Copy !req
144. How do you...Copy !req
145. - GUILLERMO: Like that.
- Shh.Copy !req
146. The Baron...Copy !req
147. is coming to visit us.Copy !req
148. Holy shit.Copy !req
149. Silence, Guillermo.Copy !req
150. Vampire comments only.Copy !req
151. The Baron never leaves
the old country.Copy !req
152. Has he told us what the purpose
of his visit is?Copy !req
153. Uh...Copy !req
154. No.Copy !req
155. The Baron is a firm believerCopy !req
156. that vampires should rule
the world.Copy !req
157. I think the main purpose
for the Baron's visitCopy !req
158. is to find out whether
we as vampiresCopy !req
159. have populated America.Copy !req
160. But as you can see,Copy !req
161. the place is fucking massive.Copy !req
162. When is he coming, exactly?Copy !req
163. - Tomorrow.
- Shit.Copy !req
164. Why didn't you give this
to me earlier?Copy !req
165. It arrived this morning, Master.Copy !req
166. Baron Afanas is...Copy !req
167. a very charming member
of the vampire royalty.Copy !req
168. A few hundred years ago,Copy !req
169. we enjoyed a very intense,
very long sexual affair.Copy !req
170. It was pretty wild.Copy !req
171. Lots of acrobatic stuff.Copy !req
172. This could make it awkward,Copy !req
173. to see him with Laszlo...Copy !req
174. present.Copy !req
175. Just between you and I,Copy !req
176. a while back, the Baron and ICopy !req
177. enjoyed a very intense
sex affair.Copy !req
178. Very animalistic.Copy !req
179. Acrobatic stuff, you might say.Copy !req
180. So I, personally,Copy !req
181. am very much looking forward
to reconnecting.Copy !req
182. We should get a chariot led byCopy !req
183. 12 black alligators.Copy !req
184. - I like that.
- That's a lot of alligators,Copy !req
185. a lot of paint.Copy !req
186. What about a van?Copy !req
187. A van?Copy !req
188. That's not the same, is it?Copy !req
189. Can you at least make sure
it's black?Copy !req
190. Yeah. Black van for tomorrow?Copy !req
191. Excellent. Uh, what about
the Baron's bloodlust?Copy !req
192. - Virgins.
- Oh, yes, let's do that.Copy !req
193. Guillermo, two virgins
by tomorrow evening.Copy !req
194. - Yes, when the Baron arrivesCopy !req
195. we shall feast on virgin blood.Copy !req
196. Vampire only laughing.Copy !req
197. - Should we tell Colin Robinson?
- Laszlo,Copy !req
198. - that is a terrible idea.Copy !req
199. He'll ruin the evening.Copy !req
200. Uh, what would ruin the evening?Copy !req
201. I told you— didn't close
the door properly.Copy !req
202. Are we having a house meeting?Copy !req
203. - No.
- No.Copy !req
204. So, your gathering here...Copy !req
205. is just a coincidence?Copy !req
206. Yes.Copy !req
207. My name is Colin Robinson.Copy !req
208. And I am what's known asCopy !req
209. a psychic vampire.Copy !req
210. Or energy vampire.Copy !req
211. This is my office.Copy !req
212. Also known
as the hunting ground.Copy !req
213. Hi, Deb.Copy !req
214. Energy vampires drain
people's energyCopy !req
215. merely by talking to them.Copy !req
216. Actual v. Budget,
year-to-date, no thanks.Copy !req
217. You're gonna be at that all day.Copy !req
218. We either bore youCopy !req
219. with a long conversation...Copy !req
220. Feeling better now, I was
a little sick this weekend.Copy !req
221. Hey, Don.Copy !req
222. Don?Copy !req
223. I have to pee, too.Copy !req
224. Or...Copy !req
225. Hey.Copy !req
226. we enrage you.Copy !req
227. In fact, you probably know
an energy vampire.Copy !req
228. We're the most common kind...Copy !req
229. of vampire.Copy !req
230. We are day-walkers,
not affected by the sun.Copy !req
231. And we are
the only kind of vampireCopy !req
232. that can drain
another vampire's energy.Copy !req
233. It's very cool.Copy !req
234. The power grows stronger
in him by the night.Copy !req
235. There's different kinds of jobs
that I have to do.Copy !req
236. Keep the house tidy.Copy !req
237. Make sure there's no sunlight.Copy !req
238. Sunlight! Why, Guillermo,Copy !req
239. why?Copy !req
240. Not on my watch.Copy !req
241. Getting rid of carcasses,Copy !req
242. I feel, is a big one.Copy !req
243. So, we are under the stairs
and this is my bedroom.Copy !req
244. This is a picture of me
as ArmandCopy !req
245. from Interview with the Vampire.Copy !req
246. Played by Antonio Banderas.Copy !req
247. That was the first time
I've ever seenCopy !req
248. an Hispanic vampireCopy !req
249. in mainstream, like, movies.Copy !req
250. And I said,
"If he can do it, I-I...Copy !req
251. I can do it."Copy !req
252. Guillermo... boarded
this whole window up,Copy !req
253. it's a huge sunlight risk.Copy !req
254. We wouldn't want the Baron
waking up to sunlightCopy !req
255. and being turned into
barbecue meat.Copy !req
256. Yeah, really cover it.Copy !req
257. He's made a lot of comments
recently, like,Copy !req
258. "I'm going to make you
a vampire."Copy !req
259. This is a little coffin toy
that, uh...Copy !req
260. I hope to be
in one of these one day.Copy !req
261. What ho, good friends.Copy !req
262. What ho!Copy !req
263. There's still a few places
to find virgins.Copy !req
264. LARPing stands for
Live Action Role Playing.Copy !req
265. In regular life,
I'm just Jonathan.Copy !req
266. But here, I am
a very high-level paladin.Copy !req
267. I'm not a killer.Copy !req
268. I find people who are easy...Copy !req
269. to... kill.Copy !req
270. Is that a 14th-century
battle-ax?Copy !req
271. Oh, it's so exciting.Copy !req
272. Uh, will we be able
to touch the swords?Copy !req
273. Oh, you'll touch the swords.Copy !req
274. We moved here from EuropeCopy !req
275. about 200 years ago
because there wasCopy !req
276. a lot of prejudice
against vampires at that time.Copy !req
277. They don't like
the color of our skin.Copy !req
278. Or the fact that
we killed and ate people.Copy !req
279. Probably more that.Copy !req
280. We're being very careful
not to stand out,Copy !req
281. which is why
we're both dressed down.Copy !req
282. - Uh, good evening.
- Go back to your own country.Copy !req
283. What the fuck did you just say?Copy !req
284. You heard me,
Ghost of Christmas Past bitch.Copy !req
285. Oh, Mike, shut up.Copy !req
286. Silence to you.
We've been here since 1861.Copy !req
287. At least, our families have.Copy !req
288. Begone.Copy !req
289. We should just suck their blood,
I'm absolutely starving.Copy !req
290. - They're perfect.
- No, I'm furious.Copy !req
291. He just insulted me,
I'm in fifth gear.Copy !req
292. - We should kill them.
- Yes, that's what I'm saying.Copy !req
293. - We should suck their blood.
- Yes.Copy !req
294. - LASZLO: Now?
- NADJA: Wait. Wait, darling.Copy !req
295. - Now?
- Now!Copy !req
296. What?Copy !req
297. - Mike?Copy !req
298. Where the fuck are you?Copy !req
299. What the fuck?Copy !req
300. Yum, yum, yum. He was delicious.Copy !req
301. Now, listen,
I don't know about you,Copy !req
302. but I'm very much in the mood
for some sexual intercourse.Copy !req
303. Darling. Right next
to the public toilet?Copy !req
304. Yes. But why don't I get home,Copy !req
305. get cleaned up, then we can
carry on with our love-making.Copy !req
306. Um, I'm going to walk home.Copy !req
307. - Why the hell would you do that?Copy !req
308. Why would you walk home?Copy !req
309. When you could turn into a bat?Copy !req
310. Bat!Copy !req
311. I would like some of that, uh,Copy !req
312. colorful dust that sparkles.Copy !req
313. - Glitter?
- Yes.Copy !req
314. Get me some glitter.Copy !req
315. Whatever for, Master?Copy !req
316. Oh, I want to do
something specialCopy !req
317. for the Immortal One's arrival.Copy !req
318. I'm going to sprinkle it
on my face and on my body.Copy !req
319. Like Twilight.Copy !req
320. So deliciously macabre.Copy !req
321. - Creepy paper.
- It's crepe paper.Copy !req
322. - Creepy paper.
- It's crepe paper, Master.Copy !req
323. Creepy... Oh, multipack.Copy !req
324. Master, this is
pretty "macarbre."Copy !req
325. Guillermo is my familiar,Copy !req
326. but sometimes he's a little too
familiar, you know what I mean?Copy !req
327. I mean, he's always
just there.Copy !req
328. I think it's good, Master.Copy !req
329. I mean, he works really hard,Copy !req
330. he's just not great at it.Copy !req
331. Guillermo, my cape is stuck.Copy !req
332. I don't like saying
this kind of thingCopy !req
333. in front of him, of course.Copy !req
334. Sorry, Guillermo.Copy !req
335. I don't like saying this kind
of thing in front of you.Copy !req
336. That's okay, Master.Copy !req
337. Lot of glitter.Copy !req
338. - Cash or card?
- Credit.Copy !req
339. You cannot pay with that.Copy !req
340. I'm so sorry.Copy !req
341. - Did you just throw a coin
at me?
- Yes.Copy !req
342. Sir, you can't be throwing
ancient coins at me.Copy !req
343. - Just... Credit card's fine.
- Guillermo, stab this man.Copy !req
344. - He's joking.
- Stab him.Copy !req
345. - Ahh...
- Thank you.Copy !req
346. - I tried, and...
- Here you go, man.Copy !req
347. - Thank you so much.
- You kind of disobeyed me
just now.Copy !req
348. And I'm noting it.Copy !req
349. Recently I have been
seeing another man.Copy !req
350. He doesn't see me, though,
because I sneak behind him.Copy !req
351. I watch him in the night,Copy !req
352. in secret.Copy !req
353. In the old country,
centuries ago,Copy !req
354. I was in a very passionate
love affairCopy !req
355. with a human man called Gregor.Copy !req
356. He was a knight.Copy !req
357. He got decapitated
in battle.Copy !req
358. I don't think I ever really
got over Gregor.Copy !req
359. Even when I met Laszlo.Copy !req
360. June, I've lost my boot.Copy !req
361. June?Copy !req
362. Come on, June.Copy !req
363. The man I saw last night,Copy !req
364. I think it is him.Copy !req
365. I think it is my reincarnated
ex-boyfriend Gregor,Copy !req
366. with his head.Copy !req
367. Put it on, June.Copy !req
368. - Shut up, Laszlo!
- Yes, there we are.Copy !req
369. Boot on.Copy !req
370. Okay, it's just
down here somewhere.Copy !req
371. Why haven't I been to
this part of the house before?Copy !req
372. It's so lovely.Copy !req
373. - No one has for 80 years.
- Gorgeous.Copy !req
374. What are we doing down here?Copy !req
375. There is a chamber, okay?Copy !req
376. It's going to be perfect
for the bloodfeast.Copy !req
377. If we have the ceremony
in here,Copy !req
378. then you-know-who
won't even need to know.Copy !req
379. I mean Colin.Copy !req
380. - Colin, what are you doing
in here?
- Oh...Copy !req
381. This is my bedroom.
I'm resting.Copy !req
382. - You idiot.Copy !req
383. I didn't know he was
gonna be in there.Copy !req
384. - Why didn't you check?Copy !req
385. It's fine, we're gonna have
the ceremony in the attic.Copy !req
386. We can't,
the StairMaster's in there.Copy !req
387. Well, we're going to move
the StairMaster.Copy !req
388. Is it definitely this boat?Copy !req
389. There he is.Copy !req
390. I knew he'd have a big box.Copy !req
391. June, you need to go
and fetch him.Copy !req
392. Sir, I just need someone
to sign for it.Copy !req
393. - Where's the pen?
- So, the tablet is the paper.Copy !req
394. Your finger is the pen.Copy !req
395. Okay, that's weird.Copy !req
396. Okay, that's nothing.Copy !req
397. Both of you, for some reason,
aren't registering here.Copy !req
398. You got long nails maybe
or something?Copy !req
399. Would you like a go, Laszlo?Copy !req
400. - Do you have a quill?
- No, it's all digital.Copy !req
401. Then I'm not signing that.Copy !req
402. Guillermo, give me your hand.Copy !req
403. - Ah.
- Okay!Copy !req
404. I think the baron
might be hereCopy !req
405. to see me become a vampire.Copy !req
406. That would be really cool.Copy !req
407. I'm ready.Copy !req
408. I should be preparing
for the bloodfeast,Copy !req
409. but I can't seem to stay away
from new Gregor.Copy !req
410. Man. Human man. Man!Copy !req
411. - S-Sorry, what did you say?
- Gregor,Copy !req
412. it is you.Copy !req
413. Oh, my name is Jeff.Copy !req
414. - Jeff?
- J-Jeff Suckler.Copy !req
415. My sweet Greg... Jeff S...Copy !req
416. Really— J-Jeff Suckler?Copy !req
417. - Yeah.
- Ew.Copy !req
418. I call that "Nadja's Theme."Copy !req
419. Guillermo, are the virgins
arriving soon?Copy !req
420. They should be
any minute now, Master.Copy !req
421. - Fingers crossed.Copy !req
422. Sorry.Copy !req
423. Don't do that.Copy !req
424. Ah. Dinner is served.Copy !req
425. Yum, yum, yum, yum,
yum, yum, yum...Copy !req
426. Hello.
So glad you could make it.Copy !req
427. Please come in, quickly.Copy !req
428. Everyone, this is Jenna
and Jonathan.Copy !req
429. - Hi.
- Hi.Copy !req
430. Are you virgins?Copy !req
431. Mm.Copy !req
432. I don't see how that's relevant.Copy !req
433. - Mm.
- I'm actuallyCopy !req
434. in a relationship online,Copy !req
435. but we've yet to meet IRL.Copy !req
436. Well done, Guillermo.Copy !req
437. Yeah.Copy !req
438. All right, okay, let's do it.Copy !req
439. Are they a vampire LARP group?Copy !req
440. Yeah, well, why don't we
wait in here?Copy !req
441. The party's gonna start
in a few minutes,Copy !req
442. so we can just hang out,
and I'll come get you when...Copy !req
443. No. No, no, no!
No, no, no, no.Copy !req
444. No, no, no.
I said no!Copy !req
445. We take our LARPing
very seriously.Copy !req
446. And that was just an example.
I wanted you to see that.Copy !req
447. I'm inspired.Copy !req
448. So, are you a knight?Copy !req
449. Yeah, I'm...
Well, no, uh, sorry.Copy !req
450. I thought you were
gonna say "night watchman."Copy !req
451. I'm a-I'm a night watchmanCopy !req
452. Mmm.Copy !req
453. Protector of the people.Copy !req
454. Oh, no, not-not really.Copy !req
455. Oh, my sweet Gregor-Jeff,Copy !req
456. I forgot how much of
a fantastic raconteur you were.Copy !req
457. - Oh, yeah.Copy !req
458. Oh, yeah, yeah.Copy !req
459. Ooh, do you remember
that first timeCopy !req
460. that we made love,
and it was so passionateCopy !req
461. that I accidentally
cut off your head?Copy !req
462. - No. What?
- Mm!Copy !req
463. But then I kept going, squeezingCopy !req
464. until my needs were met. Hmm.Copy !req
465. We should do that again.Copy !req
466. But I mustn't.
But I want to.Copy !req
467. But you can't.Copy !req
468. But I have been married
for such a long time.Copy !req
469. - Oh.Copy !req
470. - I must go.
- Okay.Copy !req
471. - Let me just get your number
before you go...Copy !req
472. so we can... I can...
we can do that again.Copy !req
473. Uh...Copy !req
474. - You're late.
- NANDOR: Throw it.Copy !req
475. That's it.Copy !req
476. Okay, Guillermo.Copy !req
477. We three... not counting
Guillermo... or June...Copy !req
478. or you...Copy !req
479. are gathered here in accordance
with the ancient...Copy !req
480. Get on with it.Copy !req
481. - NADJA: Get on with it.
- Guys.Copy !req
482. - In bearings with the ordinanceCopy !req
483. of the nine generations
that have surpassed usCopy !req
484. before this historic
and memorable moment.Copy !req
485. Guillermo, open the casketCopy !req
486. of Baron Afanas.Copy !req
487. - Oh...Copy !req
488. Oh, it opens all by itself.Copy !req
489. It's so cool.Copy !req
490. Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa...Copy !req
491. I say, old chap,
that's our familiar.Copy !req
492. Good God.Copy !req
493. Guillermo, did you see?Copy !req
494. He ate the familiar.Copy !req
495. That's scary.Copy !req
496. Ne la materiaCopy !req
497. che mai non dormeCopy !req
498. re de le forme.Copy !req
499. I have risen again.Copy !req
500. Hello, Nadja.Copy !req
501. Hello.Copy !req
502. He's so hilarious.Copy !req
503. - Laszlo.
- LASZLO: Yes.Copy !req
504. I seem to remember him
having genitals.Copy !req
505. No, never. That is why he was
such a good lover.Copy !req
506. Guillermo, fetch the virgins.Copy !req
507. As an advocate of the old ways,Copy !req
508. - can I just apologize
for the crepe paper?
- NANDOR: Hey...Copy !req
509. It should have been
human skin, obviously.Copy !req
510. And I deeply apologize
for the StairMaster.Copy !req
511. - It's all his fault.
- I go through all this effort,
I get the creepy paper.Copy !req
512. - I get Guillermo to...
- LASZLO: It's not "creepy."Copy !req
513. It's crepe paper, crepe.Copy !req
514. Silence!Copy !req
515. I come with a proclamation.Copy !req
516. The old ways...Copy !req
517. are over.Copy !req
518. Which is what I just said.Copy !req
519. The New World, as you call it,Copy !req
520. is our lifelineCopy !req
521. to an eternal future.Copy !req
522. Si...Copy !req
523. It's a documentary crew.
They're cameras.Copy !req
524. It's like they're not even here.Copy !req
525. - They are filming me?
- Yes.Copy !req
526. Just pretend
like they're not there.Copy !req
527. It's kind of a natural piece.Copy !req
528. You were saying, Baron?Copy !req
529. Centuries have passed,Copy !req
530. and you have not conquered
the New World.Copy !req
531. You hide in the shadows.Copy !req
532. Bah. You are weak.Copy !req
533. Oh, God. Oh...Copy !req
534. Not now, Guillermo.Copy !req
535. Go, go, go. Go, go, go.Copy !req
536. - Go.
- BARON: Oh, by now,Copy !req
537. you should rule this,
this, uh...Copy !req
538. - what is this place again?
- Staten Island.Copy !req
539. This Staten Island.Copy !req
540. Is this Staten Island
the seat of powerCopy !req
541. in the New World?Copy !req
542. It is where the boat
dropped us off.Copy !req
543. Down with the old ways.
Up with t-the New World.Copy !req
544. I've been saying it for
centuries, and he would neverCopy !req
545. - listen...
- Shh.Copy !req
546. Mm. I must slumber.Copy !req
547. But when I awaken,Copy !req
548. we will rule this...Copy !req
549. Staten Island.Copy !req
550. Y-Yes.Copy !req
551. - Yes!
- Yes.Copy !req
552. Nadja?Copy !req
553. Baron.Copy !req
554. - Laszlo.
- Baron.Copy !req
555. It's Nandor.Copy !req
556. Thank God.Copy !req
557. The Baron is furious with us.Copy !req
558. It's so dumb
that I wore glitter.Copy !req
559. Let's get rid of this shit.Copy !req
560. If we don't conquer
the New World,Copy !req
561. he's going to kill us.Copy !req
562. Again.Copy !req
563. - Basically, we're fucked.
- Fucked.Copy !req
564. Well, that was
a complete disaster.Copy !req
565. At least we have the virgins.Copy !req
566. - Uh, yes.Copy !req
567. for an economy car.Copy !req
568. - NANDOR: Oh, great.
- GUILLERMO: We're too late.Copy !req
569. Colin Robinson has drained them
of all their energy.Copy !req
570. "How are you gonna
wash this car?"Copy !req
571. They have
no nutritional value now.Copy !req
572. And I know you two said
you don't drive,Copy !req
573. and don't have
driver's licenses,Copy !req
574. but are you gonna do a...Copy !req
575. a-a different type
of car wash,Copy !req
576. maybe having detailing done?Copy !req
577. Now, detailing,
they go into your carCopy !req
578. and they get into the nooks
and crannies, so...Copy !req
579. Anyway, you take care, okay?Copy !req
580. You are glum, Guillermo.Copy !req
581. No.
- Yes.Copy !req
582. You think that I've forgotten
that tonightCopy !req
583. is a special occasion for you
as well, haven't you?Copy !req
584. Does not an anniversary
deserve a rewardCopy !req
585. recognizing your years
of service?Copy !req
586. I'm ready, Master.Copy !req
587. Good.Copy !req
588. Prepare yourself.Copy !req
589. Happy anniversary, Guillermo.Copy !req
590. - Wow...
- It's a glitter portrait.Copy !req
591. It's a portrait
made from glitter.Copy !req
592. Look, it's you.Copy !req
593. I made you a vampire.Copy !req
594. And look who's next to you.Copy !req
595. It's me.Copy !req
596. - Wow.
- Enjoy it.Copy !req
597. You can put it
in your depressing room.Copy !req
598. And you deserve it.
Two years of service.Copy !req
599. T-Ten.Copy !req
600. Ten years of service.Copy !req
601. - Ten.
- Ten years of service?Copy !req
602. Okay.Copy !req
603. Night, Guillermo.Copy !req