Wander Over Yonder 1x12

Directed by Craig McCracken • Lauren Faust

Aziz Ansari as Westley (voice)

Westley, the smallest member of Lord Hater's Watchdog army, accidentally gets left behind during a search for Wander and Sylvia. Westley has Wander and Sylvia as his prisoners so he can return to Lord Hater, but Wander seeks to make him a new friend.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. What a view.

2. Computer ( Over p.A. ): Emergency briefing!

3. All watchdogs report to hall b.

4. Emergency briefing! Yes!

5. Guys! Wake up!

6. ( Groans ) Aw, come on, man. Shut up, westley.

7. It's probably another drill.

8. This is not a drill!

9. Guys! Come on!

10. Is moose up? Somebody wake up moose!

11. Wake up, moose! ( Groans )

12. Good one, moose.

13. Come on, guys. Let's keep it moving.

14. Rank and file. Let... ( Groans )

15. Uh, hey, does anybody have a stepstool?

16. Okay, yeah, that's prob... that's what I figured.

17. Watchdogs! Our sensors just detected

18. two high-priority targets on a nearby planetoid!

19. These two are number one

20. and number two on lord hater's "most hated" list.

21. They operate against everything lord hater stands for...

22. All in the name of "having fun."

23. ( Growling ) Fun...

24. They're cunning, devious tricksters.

25. Shiftless, indolent,

26. and they don't shower very often.

27. They are enemies of the hater empire,

28. and that makes them your enemies.

29. Enemies! ( Growls )

30. And even though, technically, we are the bad guys,

31. these two are the real bad guys!

32. Bad guys!

33. If we can stop these two,

34. there will finally be no one to stop us from spreading fear

35. and hate throughout the entire universe!

36. ( All chanting ) Hate's great! Best villain!

37. Hate's great! Best villain! Best villain!

38. ( Chanting continues ) Hate's great! Best villain! Hate's great!

39. ( Chanting stops ) Best villain!

40. Guys! Guys! ( Groans )

41. Wow! Wander and Sylvia! Can you believe it?

42. What an exciting day!

43. Oh, man, what if i captured them?

44. Can you imagine?

45. I bet I'd get to meet lord hater himself.

46. Yeah. He'd probably give you a medal or somethin'.

47. A medal! My whole life...

48. Would be...

49. Complete.

50. ( watchdogs chanting ) Westley! Westley! Westley!

51. ( Dreamily ) Wow...

52. ( Watchdogs chanting ) Hate's great! Best villain!

53. Hate's great! Best villain! ( Westley groaning )

54. ( Weakly ) Hate's... Great.

55. Best... Villain.

56. This is the life. Huh, pal?

57. Sure is,

58. although the weather looks to be changin' soon.

59. Watchdogs!

60. Wait! Guys!

61. Lord hater! Medal!

62. Boing boing?

63. ( Wander shouting ) Wah-hoo!

64. Hey, guys! Don't worry! I'm coming!

65. Oh, boy. ( Sighs )

66. Okay. Here we go.

67. Hate's great! Best villain!

68. Are you kidding me?

69. Of all the incompetent,

70. bungling, inept,

71. amateurish, bush-league troops in the universe!

72. Wait! You forgot...

73. ( Dejectedly ) Me.

74. Aw. Look at him there,

75. all sad and helpless.

76. Can we keep him? Please?

77. What? No way!

78. Wander, that ain't some lost critter.

79. That is a watchdog, a trained killer, a...

80. commander peepers!

81. Sir! This is private westley reporting in!

82. No. N-not Leslie.

83. Westley, with a "w," as in "Wander."

84. Anyway, you kind of, um, left me behind.

85. Could you come pick me up?

86. No, sir. I-I-I haven't captured Wander and Sylvia.

87. That's not the only reason you'd come back for me, right? ( Garbled radio transmission )

88. Well, maybe because I'm a good soldier and you like me?

89. So, uh, just to be totally clear,

90. I should n-not be expecting a pickup?

91. What's the plan?

92. Just do what I do.

93. Oh, no! A watchdog!

94. How dreadful!

95. ( Flatly ) I hope he does not take us prisoner

96. and then use us to make hater come and rescue him.

97. That truly would be a dark day for Wander and Sylvia.

98. Okay! Reach for the sky!

99. Commander peepers, sir!

100. Private westley reporting in!

101. Again! ( Garbled radio transmission )

102. Westley. ( Garbled radio transmission )

103. We just talked, like, two minutes ago.

104. ( Garbled radio transmission ) Never mind. I'm happy to report

105. that I've captured Wander and Sylvia.

106. No, I'm serious. I did. I totally did.

107. They're my prisoners and everything.

108. ( Garbled radio transmission ) Floppy hat,

109. big, goofy grin, and a dumpy, grumpy zbornak.

110. "Dumpy"? Poor little fella.

111. He'd never make it out here all by his lonesome,

112. especially with the weather changing real soon.

113. Weather? What does weather have to do...

114. boop.

115. ( Whinnies ) Yes, sir.

116. I promise you I have them.

117. ( Garbled radio transmission ) Thank you, sir.

118. ( Garbled radio transmission ) Great. I'll see you then.

119. Okay, prisoners. We have to meet lord hater's ship

120. on the top of that Mountain tomorrow morning.

121. Tomorrow? There?

122. He can't just fly to meet you right now?

123. He's very busy with important appointments, okay?

124. Otherwise, he totally would.

125. ( Gun hums ) Now march!

126. Look, hater's coming to get him.

127. He'll be fine on his own for one day.

128. Let's just get out of here.

129. I said, "march"!

130. I'm okay!

131. I-I actually just seem to be stuck

132. on the same branch! Just don't...

133. you're still my prisoners, okay?

134. ( Sighs ) I'll get the fishing pole.

135. Isn't this the most amazing

136. of amazing days, westley, old pal?

137. I mean, look at this place!

138. Look at that crazy guy... And that thing. ( Indistinct ) All about.

139. Bet you don't get a chance to see this kind of thing

140. very much, do you, Wes?

141. Stop!

142. Oh, would you look at that!

143. Ya know, if we take that path over there,

144. I bet we'd get to see some incredible things.

145. Could be a lot of fun...

146. I'm not here to have fun.

147. I'm here to capture my enemies,

148. a couple of real bad guys,

149. for lord hater and also get a medal.

150. Besides, I don't need your nature-loving wisdom.

151. I have the knowledge of the hater empire in my hands,

152. and it says we go left.

153. Left.

154. Remind me why we have to watch out for this whack-a-doodle.

155. Hey, come on. This isn't yours.

156. Nice try, nature!

157. Backup locator.

158. Hater regulation 85...

159. always carry an extra backup.

160. This one has a handy wrist strap.

161. Out of the way! I'm not a doctor!

162. Pulse pulsing. Heart yearning.

163. Blood pressure 2,000 over 13.

164. Eye, beautiful. Reflexes flexing.

165. Step aside. This man needs c.P.R.!

166. Get off! I'm fine!

167. I don't need your help.

168. I was just having fun, is all.

169. But if you ask me, you could use an attitude adjustment.

170. That's enough!

171. Now march! We can't keep hater waiting.

172. Ah! Ah!

173. This way.

174. ( Sloshing ) Huh?

175. Aah! ( Yelling )

176. Aw. My little bitty blaster.

177. Hey! Come on! Give it back!

178. Wah!

179. Come on, westley!

180. You can do it!

181. ( Whimpering ) Almost there, big guy.

182. Aah... Go, go, go, go, go.

183. Oh, you're so close.

184. Attaboy! Yay!

185. Oh, good! You did it! All right!

186. Yeah! You did it!

187. Aw. You know, he's...

188. he's actually kinda cute when he's not...

189. We made it!

190. Yes!

191. Westley, we should probably stick to the trail.

192. Nope! Sorry!

193. I've had enough of your so-called fun.

194. ( Wander and Sylvia laughing ) Huh?

195. Ya-hoo!

196. Huh?

197. Cliff! Cliff! Cliff!

198. Do that awesome jumpy thing.

199. That'll stop him! "Stop"?

200. O-kay!

201. Whoo! That was amazing!

202. Hey, man, thanks for leading me to this river.

203. The old fire-mane was flaring up again.

204. Happens whenever I get to thinking about stuff that makes me all mad.

205. I just... foom!

206. Then I'm all "rah!"

207. You know? ( Chuckling )

208. That or when I have too much dairy.

209. Well, see ya.

210. Well how about that?

211. Sometimes it turns out your enemy's not such a bad guy after all.

212. No! You think I can't tell what you're doing?

213. You're just being nice to me because you want me to betray lord hater.

214. He said you were cunning, devious tricksters,

215. and he's right. You are bad guys.

216. Well, tough bananas. It's not gonna work.

217. "Tough bananas"?

218. Westley, we're helping you 'cause you're our friend.

219. We like you. Right, Sylvia?

220. Huh? Oh, yeah!

221. Yeah, you're a pretty okay guy, you know,

222. when you're... Asleep.

223. Oh, sure. Everybody's friends.

224. You're my friends. That fire lion was my friend.

225. This giant cobra-bear is my friend.

226. Not your friend. Uh-uh.

227. Thank goodness you discovered that cobra-bear's weakness.

228. I know i can't keep anything down when I'm being tickled.

229. Wha... I don't...

230. huh?

231. I knew it.

232. They were just waiting until I was asleep

233. so they could take my blaster

234. and do who knows what kind of horrible things.

235. Ahh.

236. Oh. Good. So good.

237. Mmm. ( Continues munching )

238. You were right, buddy.

239. Weather's definitely changing.

240. Huh?

241. What a view.

242. Yeah.

243. Mornin', pal?

244. Mornin'.

245. This better be worth it, peepers!

246. I had a brunch today!

247. I'm sorry, sir. I just thought it was worth checking out.

248. If he doesn't show up with Wander and Sylvia

249. in five seconds, we're leaving!

250. Five... hater's awesome... four... hater's awesome...

251. all right, little guy. Enjoy your life of evil and nefariousness.

252. It's been a blast, but we are out of here.

253. Ya know, there's a view up ahead

254. that's about a gazillion times nicer than this one.

255. Why don't you come with us?

256. Two... hater is awesome!

257. One... hater's awesome!

258. I'm sorry, sir! I knew he wasn't watchdog material.

259. I should never have even sent him on this mission!

260. No. I'm not coming with you.

261. You're coming with me!

262. ( Watchdogs chanting ) Westley! Westley! Westley! Westley!

263. Stupid, unpredictable weather.

264. Lord hater: Private westley,

265. today, you have made us all truly proud.

266. For your totally evil deed

267. of capturing Wander and Sylvia,

268. I am proud to present you

269. the official hater medal of evil!

270. no longer will Wander and Sylvia

271. be free to spread their dangerous,

272. fun-loving ways

273. throughout the galaxy!

274. Actually...

275. ( flatly ) Hate's great. Best villain.

276. ( all chanting ) Westley! Westley! Westley!

277. ( Chanting continues ) ♪ westley

278. Lord hater! Wake up!

279. There's been an explosion on the prison level!

280. What? W-what happened?

281. We're not sure. I'm having the security footage

282. from the past hour uploaded now.

283. Lord hater: Oh, yes, that's very good.

284. A locked cell. Nothing unusual here.

285. What? Wander and Sylvia escaped?

286. Sound the alarm!

287. Oh, look, it's westley! Get 'em, westley!

288. You got this, little guy!

289. Yeah! Uh, blast 'em, westley!

290. Pew! Pew!

291. Westley, no! Watch out! There's a bomb!

292. Lord hater: No! Not westley!

293. I'm gonna...

294. I'm gonna need a moment with this.

295. Westley...

296. Today we honor our bad friend westley.

297. We did not know him long.

298. ( Whispering indistinctly ) Three years.

299. We knew him several years.

300. And never before

301. had a watchdog displayed such...

302. M-malice,

303. ( voice breaking ) Such contempt...

304. Such... Cruelty.

305. He single-handedly

306. captured my most hated enemies.

307. We...

308. we may never know what happened to him.

309. But we will...

310. we will always... ( Clears throat )

311. Know... ( Sobbing )

312. He truly wa...

313. a bad guy!

314. Don't look at me! ( Sobbing )

315. You think we got away with it? Well, we're still sitting here,

316. aren't we?

317. Of course it worked!

318. I've been studying hater's ship.

319. All his cameras will see is me getting sucked out into space

320. trying to stop you guys.

321. I'll probably be remembered as a hero

322. or something dumb like that.

323. whoo! ( Song ends )

324. There, there, sir. We're all gonna miss westley.

325. Huh? I'm upset because Wander and Sylvia got away again!

326. Who's westley?