1. Lee and I have
some issues to discuss.Copy !req
2. Open or closed?Copy !req
3. - Open.
- Closed.Copy !req
4. He said to do closed.Copy !req
5. You all are probably wondering
why I'm sitting with you.Copy !req
6. Lee Russell is an asshole.Copy !req
7. No shit.Copy !req
8. He's got me substitute
teaching history class.Copy !req
9. You even go to college?Copy !req
10. Yes.
I went to college.Copy !req
11. What were your SAT scores?Copy !req
12. I think my SAT scores
are none of your business.Copy !req
13. The teachers definitely hate you
and mock you at every turn.Copy !req
14. King Ding-a-Ling?Copy !req
15. MS.
So, I made it my wall paper.Copy !req
16. Woo!Copy !req
17. I am the Principal.Copy !req
18. Uh, I was supposed
to be Principal too, so...Copy !req
19. Yes... But, then you got shot.Copy !req
20. You were broken
and I brought you back.Copy !req
21. Most mischievous
foul sin...Copy !req
22. What a life is this,Copy !req
23. that your poor friends
must woo your company?Copy !req
24. A fool, a fool!Copy !req
25. I met a fool in the forest,Copy !req
26. a motley fool,
in a miserable world!Copy !req
27. All right. Listen,
listen, listen, listen!Copy !req
28. My good friend
Joni Mitchell once said,Copy !req
29. "Laughing and crying..."
And shut up, Maggie!Copy !req
30. "... is the same release."Copy !req
31. Think, think, think,
think, think, think.Copy !req
32. Seychelles!Copy !req
33. Seychelles!Copy !req
34. Where are you, big boy?Copy !req
35. Seychelles!Copy !req
36. Come out, come out,
wherever you are.Copy !req
37. Seychelles.Copy !req
38. Seychelles.
I see you in that red hat!Copy !req
39. Get out here, right now!Copy !req
40. Team-building is mandatory,
Russell says so.Copy !req
41. Have a heart. I have all this
work to do, you know that.Copy !req
42. Seychelles—
You don't understand!Copy !req
43. You're not an artist!
Get the fuck out!Copy !req
44. Move it, ladies!Copy !req
45. If we are passionate,
there is nothing
we cannot accomplish.Copy !req
46. Power is speed and force.
Let's go!Copy !req
47. These guys are working
the teachers like Hebrew slaves.Copy !req
48. SweatDogs are the best
team-building company
in the world.Copy !req
49. They've even done it
for Japanese corporations.Copy !req
50. Look at Seychelles's ass.Copy !req
51. Flustered, sweating,
and looking like a bitch.Copy !req
52. What are you doing?
Don't look at me.Copy !req
53. Get up. We don't fall over.
Don't look at me.Copy !req
54. On your feet, sir!Copy !req
55. I can't do it.
It's too heavy.Copy !req
56. It's too heavy?
Well, we've identified
the weak one.Copy !req
57. The man
in the infinity scarf.Copy !req
58. That's how you keep
people in line, Gamby.Copy !req
59. You push them
to the limits.Copy !req
60. That's enough.
He's trying his best.Copy !req
61. Break them down to nothing.Copy !req
62. I think you should get back
to doing what you were doing.
Don't touch me.Copy !req
63. And rebuild them
into whatever you want.Copy !req
64. Pretty diabolical there, boss.Copy !req
65. It's good to be the king.Copy !req
66. What I just witnessed:
the most obnoxious,Copy !req
67. arrogant, out-of-shape
group of teachersCopy !req
68. that I have ever seen
in my life.Copy !req
69. And we work
with the Special Olympics!Copy !req
70. Well, why do you think
I fuckin' called you?Copy !req
71. Huh? You got
your fuckin' berets.Copy !req
72. You got your tank tops.Copy !req
73. Isn't it to whip people
into shape?Copy !req
74. Don't worry, don't worry.
We like to implementCopy !req
75. involuntary reeducation
of basic beliefs and valuesCopy !req
76. to adjust to your
institution's philosophy.Copy !req
77. Hmm. So brainwashing.
It's not brainwashing.Copy !req
78. We call it...
Think-change.Copy !req
79. Shawn came up with that term.Copy !req
80. I used to be fat as fuck,Copy !req
81. but I had to change
my lifestyle and my mindsetCopy !req
82. to get jacked and pumped.Copy !req
83. Think-change.Copy !req
84. You, my friend,
are fuckin' cool!
You're damn right.Copy !req
85. What, Janice?Copy !req
86. Can't you see I'm talking
to these SweatDogs?Copy !req
87. Oh, I'm very sorry to...Copy !req
88. interrupt.
Then why are you
interrupting?Copy !req
89. Your wife called,Copy !req
90. and, um, it's urgent.Copy !req
91. So, what's
the emergency, Russell?Copy !req
92. My father passed away.Copy !req
93. Aw, shit.Copy !req
94. I'm sorry, Russell.
Were you guys close?Copy !req
95. No.Copy !req
96. He was a Navy captain,
my daddy.Copy !req
97. A fuckin' man's man.Copy !req
98. He showered
my two older sisters
with all the affection.Copy !req
99. They grew up to be tomboys,Copy !req
100. interested in sports and cars.Copy !req
101. He was always
more proud of them
than he ever was of me.Copy !req
102. That's tough.Copy !req
103. That's real tough.Copy !req
104. I know how it is.Copy !req
105. Really?
Your father was an asshole
who looked down on you too?Copy !req
106. I mean...
not really.Copy !req
107. Actually, he supported me
in all my endeavors,Copy !req
108. was there for me pretty much
every step of the way.Copy !req
109. What the fuck?Copy !req
110. You have no fuckin' idea
what I'm going through, Gamby!Copy !req
111. Well, I still
really, really pity you.Copy !req
112. Is there anything I can do?Copy !req
113. Yes.Copy !req
114. I need you to run Jackson
while I'm gone.Copy !req
115. For a day.Copy !req
116. You think you can do that
without fuckin' it up?Copy !req
117. Trust me, okay?
I can handle anything.Copy !req
118. Can you handle these lazy,
fuckin' teachers?
Yeah.Copy !req
119. Don't let them get out
of the team-building
workshops either.Copy !req
120. I paid these SweatDogs
good money to beat them
into submission.Copy !req
121. If they participate,
you write them up.Copy !req
122. Mandatory attendance.
Got it. Easy.
And a fine.Copy !req
123. And a fine.Copy !req
124. Look at that.Copy !req
125. Come tomorrow,Copy !req
126. you will be principal
of North Jackson high school.Copy !req
127. For a day.Copy !req
128. It'll be nice to see
your sisters again.Copy !req
129. We haven't seen them in ages.Copy !req
130. Their boys must be
all grown up by now.Copy !req
131. All four of their kids
together look likeCopy !req
132. a retarded
Hitler youth group.Copy !req
133. Oh, fuck, no!Copy !req
134. Christine,
I have a white stainCopy !req
135. on my special
black funeral suit!Copy !req
136. It's so small,
you can hardly notice it.Copy !req
137. My sisters notice
everything.Copy !req
138. Lynn will say that this
looks like dried-up cum,Copy !req
139. and Lacey will say
that it is dried-up cum.Copy !req
140. You know how my sisters are
towards me, Christine!Copy !req
141. Yeah, but
everything's closed.Copy !req
142. Nothing's open now.
But...Copy !req
143. Nobody's going to be
noticing your suit.Copy !req
144. You're there to celebrate
your father's life.Copy !req
145. It doesn't look
like dried-up cum.Copy !req
146. Okay.Copy !req
147. God damn it.Copy !req
148. with liberty
and justice for all.Copy !req
149. Unbelievable.Copy !req
150. Good morning,
boss for the day.Copy !req
151. Principal Gamby.Copy !req
152. What do you two
think you are doing?
We just raised the flag,Copy !req
153. getting the doors
open for business.Copy !req
154. You don't think I would have
wanted to raise the flag, Nash?Copy !req
155. Russell usually does it,
but we didn't know
that you were—Copy !req
156. Listen to what you're
saying, okay, Nash.Copy !req
157. Russell usually does it
because he's the principal.Copy !req
158. What am I today?
I'm the principal, Nash.Copy !req
159. Of course
I want to raise the flag!Copy !req
160. And why are you wearing
a hat when you're pledging
allegiance, Nash?Copy !req
161. The one fuckin' time I've ever
seen you with a hat,Copy !req
162. and it's when
you're raising the flag.Copy !req
163. You guys suck beans
at being patriots.Copy !req
164. Mr. Gamby, you have
a nine o'clock with
Harold in maintenance,Copy !req
165. and then you have
a 9:30 phone call
with the district,Copy !req
166. and then after lunch,
you have a meeting
with student government.Copy !req
167. Oh, and, um,
here's the checklistCopy !req
168. of all the teachers doing
new curriculum proposals.Copy !req
169. You're about to give me
a fuckin' panic attack,Copy !req
170. and I'm just starting
to get situated, okay.Copy !req
171. Don't be fuckin'
with my head!Copy !req
172. I'm sorry, um...Copy !req
173. You have about seven minutes
until morning announcements.Copy !req
174. I have to do that?Copy !req
175. It'll be fun.Copy !req
176. Okay. This is
a teleprompter.Copy !req
177. Can you read okay?Copy !req
178. These are the words
that I'm to say?
Yes, it is.Copy !req
179. Okay. Easy fine. Cinch.
Okay.Copy !req
180. I'm gonna give you a countdown
and we're gonna start. Three.Copy !req
181. Two.
Two, one.Copy !req
182. One.
Three, two, one,
to do what?Copy !req
183. To do what?
To do the thing? I'm ready.Copy !req
184. Go!
Fine. Shut up.Copy !req
185. Oh shit, Mr. Gamby on TV.Copy !req
186. Hey! Good afternoon, ladies.Copy !req
187. Tigers.
Tigers.Copy !req
188. I'm Principal Namby...Copy !req
189. Robotics Club is canceling
their monthly meetings
next Thursday,Copy !req
190. so, no reason
to go to the meetings,Copy !req
191. 'cause no one who does robots
is going to be there.Copy !req
192. Uh, today, is Miranda Clarke
and Ricky Leache's birthday.Copy !req
193. It's a special time
to have a birthday,Copy !req
194. to be able to celebrate
with your friends.Copy !req
195. Mr. Gamby looks like
he's having a stroke.Copy !req
196. Uh, faculty is reminded
that today after school,Copy !req
197. team-building with
the SweatDogs will continue.Copy !req
198. Attendance is mandatory.Copy !req
199. And in the final words
of every...Copy !req
200. the stuff for the
morning announcements,Copy !req
201. is that there is no fearCopy !req
202. of anything slipping
through the cracksCopy !req
203. while Lee Russell is gone,
because I am here,Copy !req
204. the principal that everyone
knows that I can be,Copy !req
205. so that the school
is in the best hands
that can ever to be in.Copy !req
206. Okay, anyway.Copy !req
207. Do I have to say that's it?
Cut. Will someone say cut?Copy !req
208. I'm sitting here
fuckin' sweating my face off.Copy !req
209. I don't know if this is going
to the fuckin'...Copy !req
210. Okay, Momma.Copy !req
211. Oh, let's go sit down
in your favorite chair.Copy !req
212. You look so good!Copy !req
213. I used to rock you
in this chair.Copy !req
214. Not-not now, Mi-Cha.Copy !req
215. Mi-Cha, please!Copy !req
216. Just go to the
snack table, please.Copy !req
217. Okay? Just...
There's some... Please.Copy !req
218. If you need anything, Momma,
please, just let me know.Copy !req
219. I'm just so glad you came, son.Copy !req
220. I didn't think you would.Copy !req
221. Momma, why would
you think that?Copy !req
222. Look who I found.Copy !req
223. Lee!Copy !req
224. Wow.Copy !req
225. You actually came.Copy !req
226. We didn't think
you'd make it. Hi.Copy !req
227. I'm not so sure why everybody
thought that I wasn't coming?Copy !req
228. That's just crazy.Copy !req
229. Well, you never called,
or texted, or...Copy !req
230. e-mailed, so what did
you expect us to think?Copy !req
231. Well, I would expect
you both to thinkCopy !req
232. that I would show up
to my own daddy's funeral.Copy !req
233. Stop trying to make
me look bad, okay?
Lee Russell.Copy !req
234. Don't you start up
again, not here.Copy !req
235. Shep! Tripp!
Come and say hi to your uncle.Copy !req
236. Yeah, Arliss, Wyatt,
get in here.
Come on.Copy !req
237. Get in here.Copy !req
238. Hey, Uncle Lee.
You came after all.Copy !req
239. After Lynn and I
finish speaking
at Dad's ceremony,Copy !req
240. they are going to play
a tribute on their guitars.Copy !req
241. Been practicing for weeks.Copy !req
242. Oh my God, you look like
a Christian rock band.Copy !req
243. So, everybody has a part
in the ceremony, except for me?Copy !req
244. We didn't think you cared.
We assumed you wouldn't want to.Copy !req
245. Momma, would you like
a nice cold cup of iced tea?Copy !req
246. Yeah, I'll get you some,
I'll get you some.
I got it. Lee, I got it.Copy !req
247. Stop— Aah!Copy !req
248. Fine. Whatever.
I'm sorry, Momma.Copy !req
249. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, Momma.Copy !req
250. Boys! Get—Copy !req
251. Can we speak to you
for a moment, Lee?
No.Copy !req
252. Why are you acting
like a little bitch?Copy !req
253. Look, we've got enough
going on here with the funeralCopy !req
254. and moving Momma
into a nursing home.Copy !req
255. Momma's moving
into a nursing home?Copy !req
256. Well, that's news to me.Copy !req
257. Of course it's news to you.
You're never around!Copy !req
258. Why do you think
we packed up
all of Dad's stuff?Copy !req
259. Yeah, I'm claiming
his China, his comfy chair,Copy !req
260. and his old Navy
magazines.
That's right.Copy !req
261. And I've got his DVDs
and his rifle.Copy !req
262. Well, did you think that maybe
I would want some of hisCopy !req
263. magazines or his rifles?Copy !req
264. Just 'cause you two
French-kissed his asshole
his whole fuckin' life—Copy !req
265. Excuse me?
Excuse me! I get some stuff too.
And you know what?Copy !req
266. I'm going to start right here—
No, you're not
gonna start anything.Copy !req
267. Lee! Stop it!Copy !req
268. That is mine!
I fuckin' claimed it!Copy !req
269. You're so funny.
You're so funny.
You should back off.Copy !req
270. I don't even want that.
It's so stupid.
You know what's funny?Copy !req
271. Is your fuckin' face,
your fuckin' little pig face.Copy !req
272. See this? It's mine.
Whatever.Copy !req
273. Fine.Copy !req
274. His model airplane.Copy !req
275. Oh, no you don't.
Hands off!Copy !req
276. Those are for our kids.Copy !req
277. Don't you think your kids
are a little bit oldCopy !req
278. to be playing
with model airplanes?Copy !req
279. You don't even have kids.Copy !req
280. That's 'cause
he's shooting blanks.Copy !req
281. Uh-oh, Lynn.Copy !req
282. Her blood is boiling.Copy !req
283. Oh yeah, she's gonna
throw a hissy fit.Copy !req
284. What, are you getting
all... all red?Copy !req
285. Are you getting red?
Oh that's so funny,Copy !req
286. you calling me
"she" again.
Look at that.Copy !req
287. Why don't you get some
new fuckin' material, all right?Copy !req
288. Lee.
Jesus, what?Copy !req
289. What is that stain
on your pants, Lee?
Oh yeah, that looks like cum.Copy !req
290. I don't have—
No, I didn't cum on myself.
Did you cum on yourself again?Copy !req
291. No, no, no, no!
No, no!Copy !req
292. No, no, no!Copy !req
293. No, no, no! No!Copy !req
294. Dirty little boy!Copy !req
295. Please— No! No.Copy !req
296. No, Lacey, Lacey.
Please, no!Copy !req
297. Open the door.
Open the door, please?Copy !req
298. You know what?Copy !req
299. Fuck you! Fuck you!Copy !req
300. When you say venison,
it has to haveCopy !req
301. all the sadness
of the exile in that word.Copy !req
302. Sh-Come! Shall we go
kill us some venison?Copy !req
303. Oh, shit.Copy !req
304. Mr. Geal Namby.Copy !req
305. Your video announcements
would have been the highlight
of my morning,Copy !req
306. but you choked,
as we actors say.Copy !req
307. Where are the curriculum
proposals that Russell
asked for yesterday?Copy !req
308. Excuse me if the proposals
are a little bit tardy.Copy !req
309. Russell has been
running us ragged,
stressing everybody out.Copy !req
310. Oh, give me a break.Copy !req
311. You're a grown man
who prances around in tights.Copy !req
312. What the hell
do you have to do?
Gamby.Copy !req
313. You're not gonna make us
stay after school
with the SweatDogs?Copy !req
314. They're not human.Copy !req
315. They threatened
to waterboard me yesterday.Copy !req
316. You're going,
Seychelles, okay?Copy !req
317. So, he dreams it up,
you execute it,Copy !req
318. like a little puppet man
coming to fuck us.Copy !req
319. You better watch your tone.Copy !req
320. I'm the principal,
do you hear me?Copy !req
321. You're not the principal!Copy !req
322. You're just a flimsy cardboard
cutout of a principal.Copy !req
323. You're just
a two-bit thespian.Copy !req
324. Stand-in.Copy !req
325. Queen for a day.
Seychelles, that's enough!Copy !req
326. Get back in there
and teach these children
how to play make-pretend.Copy !req
327. Just like you're
making-pretend
to be principal.Copy !req
328. Fuck you.
Fuck you.Copy !req
329. Adolescent behavior.Copy !req
330. What is the matter?Copy !req
331. Why are you so upset?Copy !req
332. They're putting you
in a home, Momma,Copy !req
333. a terrible, awful,
nursing home.Copy !req
334. It's my idea.Copy !req
335. I don't want to live in this
big old house all by myself.Copy !req
336. I want to be with people
my own age.Copy !req
337. They have
brainwashed you, Momma.Copy !req
338. It breaks my heart to think
of you in a place like thatCopy !req
339. where the orderlies
molest all the seniors.Copy !req
340. Stop.Copy !req
341. Lynn and Lacey are
rotten human beings, Momma.Copy !req
342. I wish that they had died
instead of Daddy.Copy !req
343. Don't you go cursing
your sisters like that.Copy !req
344. I know you don't get along
with them and I know why,Copy !req
345. 'cause you think
Daddy liked them better.Copy !req
346. Well, maybe,
I do, yes, but...Copy !req
347. we will never know if
that's true or not, Momma.Copy !req
348. No, it's true.
He loved them more.Copy !req
349. Your sisters are mean.
Yeah.Copy !req
350. They tease you,
they strip off your clothes.Copy !req
351. Do you think I'm blind?
I know that.Copy !req
352. But they were never
being sneaky like you.Copy !req
353. You told lies,
lies that stung.Copy !req
354. Daddy didn't like that,
even if they caused it.Copy !req
355. Make your daddy proud
of you for once.Copy !req
356. You're right, Momma.Copy !req
357. I'm... I'm sorry.Copy !req
358. Oh!Copy !req
359. I love you.
I love you.Copy !req
360. Back it up.Copy !req
361. Hey, Mr. Gamby, those teachers
hate them SweatDogsCopy !req
362. more than they hate your ass.Copy !req
363. Oh, here we go.
Oh, shit.Copy !req
364. Gamby, this is
getting ridiculous.Copy !req
365. The SweatDogs
want us to recordCopy !req
366. when we throw out
our lunches now.Copy !req
367. And they're harassing us
about our diets.
Shh. SweatDogs are coming.Copy !req
368. What? Ridiculous.
Ms. Snodgrass.Copy !req
369. Mrs. Deets.
Lunchtime is over.Copy !req
370. There is no time
for stop and chat.Copy !req
371. Is this normal behavior,
Mr. Gamby.Copy !req
372. The stop and chats?
Uh, I mean...Copy !req
373. Yeah, the teachers
usually do chitchatCopy !req
374. after lunch.
That is your fault.
I blame you.Copy !req
375. You are enabling
this behavior.Copy !req
376. Look, I know about
being a leader too.Copy !req
377. I mean, it's like,
the main part of my job,Copy !req
378. like being productive,
and... and being leader.Copy !req
379. We do the same thing.
Incorrect, Mr. Gamby.Copy !req
380. You don't do what we do.Copy !req
381. Because if you did what we do,
we wouldn't be here.Copy !req
382. Do you see what I'm saying?Copy !req
383. Yeah. But I'm not sure
if you're seeing what
I'm saying, which is,Copy !req
384. I also specialize
in leadership too.Copy !req
385. Show me. Show us.Copy !req
386. Be the leader
that you say you are.Copy !req
387. Get these underlings
back to work. I want to see.Copy !req
388. Okay, yeah, well...Copy !req
389. Women...
Come, come, women, now.Copy !req
390. Enough with
the small talk, okay?Copy !req
391. It's time to get back
to your places.Copy !req
392. That was pathetic.
Bark at them.Copy !req
393. Go on! I said,
go on now.Copy !req
394. Get to class,
the both of you.Copy !req
395. You got—
Bark at them. Bark at them!Copy !req
396. Go—
Bark at them!Copy !req
397. God damn it!
Get back to your fuckin'
classes right now! Go!Copy !req
398. Shoo!
Get on, varmints!Copy !req
399. It's not about
being nice, ladies.Copy !req
400. It's about being leadership.Copy !req
401. I like it!
See, I told you guys.Copy !req
402. I can do this.Copy !req
403. Fantastic!
Yeah!Copy !req
404. Are you going to stand here
like an assholeCopy !req
405. or you going to get back
to work yourself?Copy !req
406. Yeah, of course
I'm gonna get back to work.
Come on. Don't trip.Copy !req
407. See you,
SweatDogs.Copy !req
408. I hate my sisters so much.Copy !req
409. They made me look
like a fuckin' loser
in my daddy's eyes.Copy !req
410. Fuck that!Copy !req
411. I should expose them.Copy !req
412. What do you mean by expose?Copy !req
413. I used to read
all their diaries.Copy !req
414. I know their deepest,
darkest secrets.Copy !req
415. They don't want me speaking
at the ceremony?Copy !req
416. Well, tough shit.Copy !req
417. I will put them
on blast.Copy !req
418. I will let the world
know what deceitful
little cunts they are.Copy !req
419. This is about celebrating
your dad's life,Copy !req
420. not waging war
against your sisters.Copy !req
421. Please, my brain
is working, Christine.Copy !req
422. What's this I'm hearing
about a consultancy firm
that Lee hired?Copy !req
423. Lee hired a consulting firm?Copy !req
424. Uh, yeah, the SweatDogs.Copy !req
425. The what? SweatDogs?Copy !req
426. They are
a world-renowned outfit.Copy !req
427. You know, they do
Fortune 500 companies,Copy !req
428. teach team-building.
Look, all I know is,Copy !req
429. I'm getting bombed
with complaintsCopy !req
430. from frustrated teachers
about this being the cherryCopy !req
431. on top of an
impossible workload.Copy !req
432. I mean, this
wasn't in the budget.
Why wasn't I informed?Copy !req
433. Would you mind if I make
a quick phone call?
I can find out.Copy !req
434. I would love for you
to check on this.Copy !req
435. Okay, I'm going to leave,
then I'm going to be right back.Copy !req
436. That would be
a swell idea,Copy !req
437. and be right back
with that information.
I'll find out the answers.Copy !req
438. Be right back.
Be right back if you can.Copy !req
439. Out.Copy !req
440. Well, you didn't fuck
everything up already,
did you, Gamby?Copy !req
441. No! I'm calling
about the SweatDogs.Copy !req
442. The teachers
complained to HaasCopy !req
443. and now he's over here
flipping out!Copy !req
444. Saying this thing
wasn't approvedCopy !req
445. and it's not
in the fuckin' budget.Copy !req
446. Just fuckin' calm down.
Just lie to the man.Copy !req
447. Look, man,
lies might slide easilyCopy !req
448. off your oily lips,
but I'm not like you.Copy !req
449. Which is why you are
a goober who couldn't hack it
as a principal.Copy !req
450. Don't give me that shit.
It's not like you're having
your fair share of problems.Copy !req
451. You're pushing
the teachers too far.Copy !req
452. Don't you tell me
how to run my school.Copy !req
453. Just tell Haas
that the SweatDogsCopy !req
454. are doing it pro gratis.Copy !req
455. That means free, dummy.Copy !req
456. No way. No way.
I'm not going to sit hereCopy !req
457. and just bald-face lie
to Superintendent Haas.Copy !req
458. Well, then I will
find someone who will!Copy !req
459. God damn it.Copy !req
460. Hey! Principal for a day!Copy !req
461. Fuck off, Willows.Copy !req
462. I'm back.Copy !req
463. Sir, I think I got to the bottom
of this whole SweatDogs thing.Copy !req
464. SweatDogs.Copy !req
465. It would appear that they are
doing their services for usCopy !req
466. pro gracias, uh,
which means for free.Copy !req
467. Hmm. Free, huh?
Yeah.Copy !req
468. Hmm. I gotta tell
you something.Copy !req
469. I've never seen morale
so low around here.Copy !req
470. What, with all
that's befallen this school,Copy !req
471. it's like North Jackson's lost
its will to live, Gamby.Copy !req
472. But, hey...Copy !req
473. maybe Lee has finally come up
with something to turn it
all around.Copy !req
474. You think?
Yeah, I hope so.Copy !req
475. Here I am!Copy !req
476. Here I am!Copy !req
477. Here you are!
Here you are!Copy !req
478. Here we are!
Here we are!Copy !req
479. I move forward!
We move forward!Copy !req
480. We are a team!
We are a team!Copy !req
481. Gamby, this is
some weird stuff.Copy !req
482. On the ground.
On your face!Copy !req
483. You have a problem
with authority, sir?Copy !req
484. Yes, we are!
Yes, we are!Copy !req
485. Yes, we are!
Yes, we are!Copy !req
486. Yes, we are!
Yes, we are!Copy !req
487. Yes, we are!
Yes, we are!Copy !req
488. We're going
to miss you, Daddy.Copy !req
489. I love you, Daddy.Copy !req
490. No.Copy !req
491. No. Lee...Copy !req
492. Excuse me.Copy !req
493. Hello. Thank you, thank you...Copy !req
494. Thank you.Copy !req
495. Uh, I just, I wanted to say...Copy !req
496. a few words, so...Copy !req
497. Uh...Copy !req
498. My daddy,Copy !req
499. always spent a hell of a lot
more time with my sistersCopy !req
500. than he ever did with me.Copy !req
501. But...Copy !req
502. he didn't know
what I've always knownCopy !req
503. about them.Copy !req
504. Which is...Copy !req
505. Whi-Which is...Copy !req
506. That they were the
luckiest girls in the world
to have had a father like him.Copy !req
507. One of my fondest
memories of DaddyCopy !req
508. was helping him
build his, his...Copy !req
509. model airplanes.Copy !req
510. If, uh... I would hand him
the wrong part and he would say:Copy !req
511. "No, Lee! Damn it!Copy !req
512. "You need to focus.Copy !req
513. You need to pay attention,"Copy !req
514. and I would hand him
the right partCopy !req
515. and he would just nod.Copy !req
516. I cherish those times.Copy !req
517. Because it meant
that he cared enoughCopy !req
518. about me to teach me
how to improve myself,Copy !req
519. how to strive for the best,
how to reach for the top.Copy !req
520. That's what he instilled in me.Copy !req
521. I wish that he could see
my life now.Copy !req
522. I have a...
a beautiful wife, Christine,Copy !req
523. and my... well, my Korean
mother-in-law, Mi-Cha.Copy !req
524. I take care of her.Copy !req
525. And I have a...Copy !req
526. Well, I have a very nice home.Copy !req
527. I'm-I'm even the...Copy !req
528. the principal
of my very own school.Copy !req
529. He would be proud...Copy !req
530. of me.Copy !req
531. I think he would.Copy !req
532. Because I...Copy !req
533. I, too, reached the top,Copy !req
534. like he...Copy !req
535. like he did.Copy !req
536. Bye-bye, Daddy.Copy !req
537. Move it.
Let's go.Copy !req
538. Go, go, go.
Move it!Copy !req
539. What are you doing?
I need water.Copy !req
540. What?
I need some water.Copy !req
541. No water for anyoneCopy !req
542. until this weakling
finishes the exercise.Copy !req
543. I'm just a drama teacher,
you guys.Copy !req
544. I can't do this.Copy !req
545. Well, then, maybe,
it is time you beCopy !req
546. just a drama teacher
someplace else,Copy !req
547. because it is teachersCopy !req
548. with a limited
view of themselvesCopy !req
549. that is keeping this placeCopy !req
550. from reaching
its full potential.Copy !req
551. This place is
the bottom of the barrel.Copy !req
552. Why?Copy !req
553. Because of you.Copy !req
554. Because of you and youCopy !req
555. and you and you and you.Copy !req
556. Yes, you specifically,Copy !req
557. and you and you.Copy !req
558. Yes, you and youCopy !req
559. and you...
No!Copy !req
560. That's enough!
That's enough right there.Copy !req
561. Get up, Seychelles, come on.
Excuse me, Mr. Gamby.
What are you doing?Copy !req
562. I'm giving the drama teacher
a glass of water, okay?Copy !req
563. Here.Copy !req
564. Actually, can I have
a San Pelligrino? My stomach—Copy !req
565. You don't know
the first thing about
what's wrong with this school.Copy !req
566. Mm.
Okay, fine, yes.Copy !req
567. Teachers can be lazy.Copy !req
568. They can be
bitch-ass complainers.Copy !req
569. But these aren't
just any teachers.Copy !req
570. These are
North Jackson teachers.Copy !req
571. So take Seychelles,
for instance, okay?Copy !req
572. He took a one act playCopy !req
573. all the way
to the state competition.Copy !req
574. It came in third, but still,
he got us to states.Copy !req
575. And then there's Ms. Deets.Copy !req
576. She did this thing
with her class, uh,
Pottery for Poverty.Copy !req
577. It raised more money—
You're not going
to start listing offCopy !req
578. a bunch of
bullshit achievementsCopy !req
579. of your staff right now,
are you?Copy !req
580. How sentimental
and uninspiredCopy !req
581. from the vice principal.Copy !req
582. You see, after watching,Copy !req
583. how you've handled
these people today,Copy !req
584. it makes complete sense
that you would never, ever,Copy !req
585. get this job for real.Copy !req
586. You're a loser who commands
no respect, whatsoever.Copy !req
587. Fuck you!Copy !req
588. Fuck you.Copy !req
589. I respect him.
Oh.Copy !req
590. This school has had worse.Copy !req
591. Guess what? You guys
can blow it out your dicks.Copy !req
592. Wow, let's see, that's...
three teachers.Copy !req
593. I see.Copy !req
594. How about you three
take your berets,Copy !req
595. your kettlebells,
and your yoga matsCopy !req
596. and shove them up your ass.Copy !req
597. I'm the principal,
I call the shots,Copy !req
598. so get the fuck
out of here right now!Copy !req
599. No, Shawn. It's fine.
We've billed them.
They've paid.Copy !req
600. Fuck 'em.
Fuck 'em all. Come, on.Copy !req
601. Good riddance,
Sweat Dicks.Copy !req
602. See ya, She-Ra.Copy !req
603. Let's go. Let's go.Copy !req
604. Get movin'.Copy !req
605. Yeah!Copy !req
606. Gamby!Copy !req
607. Go, Gamby!Copy !req
608. Don't tell Russell.
Don't tell Russell, okay?Copy !req
609. Seriously, don't tell him
what happened.Copy !req
610. Good-bye.Copy !req
611. Daddy, I will miss you.Copy !req
612. Thank you.Copy !req
613. Good to see you, Larry.Copy !req
614. I so appreciate it, I really do.
Let us know
if you need anything, okay?Copy !req
615. Thank you.Copy !req
616. I'll meet you in the car.Copy !req
617. So nice to see you.Copy !req
618. Take my bags
to the car, Mi-Cha.Copy !req
619. Hey, Lee.Copy !req
620. Good speech.Copy !req
621. The boys are still
getting the airplanes.Copy !req
622. I hope you're not going
to make a big federal case
about us taking them?Copy !req
623. Don't worry, I won't.Copy !req
624. I've let it go.Copy !req
625. You guys are my family.Copy !req
626. Are you serious?Copy !req
627. You're not going to throw
a hissy fit or a tantrum?Copy !req
628. No?Copy !req
629. Momma.Copy !req
630. You made me
so proud of you today.Copy !req
631. And I bet you made
your daddy proud too.Copy !req
632. Now you be a good man
from now on, okay?Copy !req
633. Just don't tell any more lies.Copy !req
634. I'm not that kind of personCopy !req
635. anymore, Momma.Copy !req
636. I am a principal...Copy !req
637. and I have principals.Copy !req
638. MS. What's up y'all?
Making cats cradles?Copy !req
639. We're re-enacting
bullet trajectories.Copy !req
640. Hey, hey— uh-uh.Copy !req
641. - MS. Gimme some bullets.
- Stop.Copy !req
642. Watch me work, you're going
to my birthday party.Copy !req
643. You bringin' a hot date?Copy !req
644. I want you to be my plus-one
to Lee Russell's birthday party.Copy !req
645. I don't want to go to your
stupid pedo-party.Copy !req
646. You're supposed to be
makin' her jealous.Copy !req
647. - Let's dance.
- Okay, I will, I do.Copy !req