1. I'm starving.
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2. And today's dinner... is sukiyaki!
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3. SUKIYAKIIIII!
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4. Sukiyaki!
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5. I've been waiting for you, darling!
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6. L-Lum?
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7. Why are you wearing that whacky outfit?
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8. We don't have time for that!
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9. You're coming with me right now!
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10. Hold on! I was about to eat sukiyaki...
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11. Just forget the sukiyaki and do what I say,
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12. or you'll be getting a taste of
my electric shock instead!
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13. I've already opened the
interdimensional passageway!
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14. Wh-what the hell is that?
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15. We have to hurry. Everyone is waiting!
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16. Where exactly are you taking me?
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17. You're going to participate in Setsubun
with me on my home planet, darling!
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18. Setsubun is an annual event
that's very important to my people!
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19. Yeah, well, my sukiyaki is just as important!
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20. It's a meal that I only get to eat
about once a year!
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21. Ah! There's no time!
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22. None of the festivities can start
until I get there!
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23. Nooooooo! My sukiyakiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!
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24. Good Day For a Departure
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25. ONI CLAN
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26. You're late, Lum.
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27. Sorry about that, Daddy!
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28. Alright! Let's get this Setsubun started!
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29. Wh-what kind of event is that?
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30. Because it looks like
you're about to go to war!
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31. Aye, you hit the nail on the head.
We're about to head into a real battle!
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32. You better gear yourself up, boyo!
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33. Aw man!
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34. I can tell just by looking at them
that fighting these guys is really gonna hurt!
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35. Get a load of this kid!
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36. Pain is the least of your worries, trust me!
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37. Watch it, chumps! You better show
some respect to the Lucky Gods!
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38. We're gonna crush the lot of ya!
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39. Oh shaddup, ya pompous windbags!
You're about as lucky as a broken mirror!
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40. Didja hear that, guys?
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41. The big fatso over there
is trying to pick a fight with us!
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42. Y-you gotta be kidding...
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43. Am I about to die on some alien planet
without ever eating my sukiyaki?
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44. No way!
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45. SCREW THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS!
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46. I thought I just heard Ataru's voice...
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47. Honey, can we eat now?
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48. Not yet, you know we have to wait for Ataru!
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49. Well, he better not be out there
causing trouble with hoodlums!
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50. I'm worried.
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51. Something awful might have happened to him.
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52. I mean, he's a glutton.
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53. There's no way he'd just pass up
on the chance to eat sukiyaki!
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54. Give 'em hell!
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55. No! I'm out!
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56. I don't wanna die!
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57. Hey! Aim before you throw, guys!
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58. Go, go, red team!
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59. Go, go, white team!
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60. Well, this is dumb.
It's just a game of basket tower toss...
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61. C'mon! C'mon! C'mon!
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62. You wanna lose or what?
Put your back into it!
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63. Whoa! Hot babe alert!
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64. Comin' through!
Go, go, go!
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65. Go, go, go!
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66. Ouch!
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67. Hello pretty lady!
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68. Can I get your digits and address?
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69. What the? Who the hell are you?
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70. Hey! You get down from there right now!
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71. Hey there, sexy.
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72. Darling! Benten is one of my longtime friends!
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73. You're in for a world of hurt
if you cheat on me with her!
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74. Don't be stupid!
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75. There's no way I'm gonna pass up
on a hottie like this!
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76. My mouth is watering already!
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77. Uh oh!
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78. Dear! Did you just hear Ataru's voice, too?
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79. Y-yeah...
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80. Ataru? Are you here?
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81. You never should have suggested
that we just eat Ataru's share!
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82. Well there's nothing we can do about it now!
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83. Besides, I'm pretty sure you're the one
who ate the majority of the meat!
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84. I beg your pardon!
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85. I just came to see if your son was okay
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86. after I had a dream
that he ended up in Hell...
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87. Unfortunately, it seems his ghost
is already among us.
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88. So, that voice we heard was his spirit?
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89. He may have been a huge dumb-ass,
but he was my only son!
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90. Oh, my poor boy!
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91. Well, it seems to me that he was strongly fixated
upon something at the time of his death.
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92. The teachings of Buddha say that
we should guide his soul into Heaven
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93. by honoring him with a service.
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94. I think we already know
what the problem is...
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95. Oh ho! I can't say I've met a spirit
that stuck around just for sukiyaki.
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96. Such a deprived boy.
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97. Look here, I don't have to take any lip
from you about my family's eating habits!
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98. In my experience, the best method
of appeasing a ghost like this
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99. is by performing a segaki ritual.
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100. Segaki ritual?
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101. We hold a sukiyaki party in front of his alter
where everybody gets to chow down!
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102. You seem awfully happy about the idea...
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103. GRUMBLE
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104. Hey, Miss Benten!
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105. Whaddya say we go watch a movie together?
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106. Uh, are you nuts?
You're flirting with me in front of your wife.
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107. It's not a problem!
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108. What?
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109. We're gonna get divorced soon.
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110. Get it together, Lum!
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111. Your job is to keep that basket steady!
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112. But Daddy!
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113. This is my chance to get
under Lum's skin a little...
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114. So hey, do you think I'm better than Lum?
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115. In terms of food, Lum is like boiled tofu
while you're a tasty serving of sukiyaki, baby!
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116. Am I really that great?
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117. P-please let me wolf you down!
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118. Be my guest.
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119. NO MORE! STOOOOP!
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120. Wait! You'll throw it off balance!
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121. YOU'RE DEAD MEAT!
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122. Nice!
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123. O-oh no, the basket fell!
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124. We're screwed!
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125. This can't be happening...!
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126. So...
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127. The match is over and the winner of this year's
Setsubun battle has been decided.
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128. Congratulations to the white team.
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129. Now, as per tradition, one person will be
chosen to face punishment.
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130. Oh no! P-please don't be me!
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131. Yikes! Are we gonna have a repeat of
that horrific tragedy from last year?
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132. We'll do it the same as we always do.
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133. Whoever was the biggest
bonehead on the losing team
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134. will be the one to face the music!
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135. Usually, it's really difficult
to make that choice.
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136. But this year, I think everyone agrees.
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137. It's gotta be my son-in-law over there!
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138. Whaaaat?
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139. Huh?
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140. Hold on! You can't, Daddy!
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141. What's gonna happen to me?
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142. Ah, I'm stuffed!
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143. I gotta say, sukiyaki sure is tasty!
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144. I don't even remember
the last time I had some.
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145. So, uh, now that we're done eating...
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146. can we move on?
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147. Oh! Yes, of course.
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148. I suppose I should take my leave soon.
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149. What about the ritual for Ataru?
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150. You better say at least one prayer,
or so help me god...!
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151. Oh, that's right.
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152. Sorry, the food was so good
I nearly forgot.
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153. You stupid bald chowhound!
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154. Just calm down, honey!
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155. Let us gather around this
devotional graphic of sukiyaki
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156. and pay our final respects
to the soul of your son.
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157. Sendai, Kobe, Hida, Omi, Matsusaka,
Tajima, Yonezawa, Yamagata.
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158. Thigh, fillet, rump, sirloin, brisket,
flank steak, and tongue with salt!
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159. Ataru!
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160. Ataru!
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161. Yikes.
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162. Out with evil!
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163. And in with luck!
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164. Darling!
Out with evil!
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165. Out with evil!
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166. And in with luck!
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167. Out with evil!
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168. Ow! Ow! Owies!
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169. He's being tortured by Oni in Hell...
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170. That's no surprise considering how he lived.
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171. Shucks, he really did end up
in purgatory after all.
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172. The poor soul.
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173. Achoo!
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174. Crud... I caught another stupid cold.
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175. Are you feeling okay?
Would you like some apple slices, Ataru?
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176. Why the hell are you here?
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177. I came to pay you a visit.
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178. Ataru! We're here to lift your spirits!
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179. Miss Lum! It's a pleasure to see-
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180. Miss Lum is out, it seems.
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181. Damn! That's the whole reason
we even came to see Ataru...
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182. He probably kicked her out or something.
I feel for Lum, that poor girl.
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183. Hey, Ataru!
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184. Tell us what happened to Lum right now!
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185. Enough, you guys!
Ataru is sick and needs rest!
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186. Shinobu!
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187. I knew you still had the hots for me!
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188. Get your hands off!
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189. And after I took time out of my
busy schedule to come see you...
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190. Whatever, you just wanted to see Lum!
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191. Obviously.
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192. Well it sucks to be you.
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193. Lum went off to Neptune
to see an alien friend of hers.
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194. Curses!
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195. This is the worst possible timing ever!
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196. Too cold!
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197. Snow?
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198. Hrmm. I feel a very strange presence among us.
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199. I suggest you check the closet.
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200. Should we open it?
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201. I'm scared.
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202. Have no fear, Miss Shinobu.
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203. I'll open it on the count of three.
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204. One, two...!
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205. Oh no, Ataru!
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206. Dig him up!
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207. Oh my, how wonderful.
There are so many men here.
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208. It's a Yuki-onna!
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209. Not so fast, foul demon!
I shall expel you from this plac-
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210. Wah!
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211. What was that for?
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212. A woman this beautiful
couldn't possibly be a demon.
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213. Crazy monk.
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214. Quit thinking with your crotch!
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215. You can't let this
closet lurking demon trick you!
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216. Dear me, how rude.
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217. I can tell when I'm not welcome.
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218. Aw, boo. You're leaving already?
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219. Would you care to guide me back?
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220. Sure!
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221. Allow me to be your escort, ma'am!
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222. How wonderful.
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223. Hold up. I thought you were sick.
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224. What on earth is going on with this closet?
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225. Oyuki
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226. Lum turned it into an interdimensional
passageway or something the other day.
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227. You boys sure have strange tastes.
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228. Why did you tag along?
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229. Please, come right this way.
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230. This is spooky, Mendo.
Let's go back.
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231. One problem,
the exit seems to have vanished...
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232. You must keep up with the group
or you'll be left behind.
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233. This passage crosses through dimensions.
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234. You'll get stuck in here forever
if you get lost.
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235. Oh no! Please wait for me!
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236. Yikes, how scary!
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237. Your ladyship!
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238. Your ladyship!
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239. Oyuki!
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240. Oyuki!
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241. That was Lum's voice!
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242. I'm coming!
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243. She's gone.
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244. C'mon, Moroboshi! Go after her!
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245. No way!
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246. Don't give me that, you dimwit!
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247. Darling?
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248. Darling!
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249. What are you doing here, darling?
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250. I could ask you the same thing!
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251. I came here to spend time with
my old friend, Oyuki!
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252. Wait, does that mean we're on Neptune?
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253. So you're Lum's husband
I've heard so much about.
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254. Nice to meet you.
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255. Then I suppose this must be
Miss Third Wheel.
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256. Lum has told me a lot about you as well.
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257. Who are you calling a third wheel?
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258. Look, it's a guy! A real guy!
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259. Wow! This is great!
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260. The mistress brought him
along with her, I guess.
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261. Why hello there.
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262. It is an honor to meet you.
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263. Oh, the pleasure is all ours!
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264. The majority of men on our planet
have to go away for work,
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265. so we need help clearing the snow.
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266. Bless your hearts!
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267. Work those shovels hard!
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268. Any guy can be popular with the ladies here.
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269. Yeah, good-looks don't move snow after all!
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270. Oh my! Look at him go!
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271. He's so strong and sturdy!
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272. I'm your man!
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273. Come. Mr. Ataru and Miss Third Wheel
can relax in my mansion.
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274. Like I said, I'm not a third wheel!
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275. Achoo!
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276. Darling? Are you all right?
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277. I got buried under a mountain of snow
in my room earlier.
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278. It really sucked...
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279. We opened an interdimensional hole
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280. to dispose of all the snow
that we have to shovel around here.
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281. I thought for sure our mistress was doomed
after she fell right into it earlier!
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282. But that was my room you dumped it into!
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283. Pardon me. I need to remove
my insulated clothing.
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284. Now, where were we?
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285. Uh, I was just saying that... well...
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286. Keep chucking that snow my way!
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287. I don't mind a bit!
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288. Great. Let me prepare us some tea.
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289. Oh please. You're fawning over her
like a lovesick puppy.
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290. Darling! You better get
your mind out of the gutter!
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291. Shaddup!
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292. Oyuki is nothing like either of you.
She's a true maiden!
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293. Jerk!
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294. Darliiiiing...!
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295. Take this, you two-timing scumbag!
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296. I just can't figure it out.
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297. Why is every woman in my life so violent?
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298. Oyuki is a literal angel compared to them...
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299. Oh my. Is there a problem, good sir?
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300. Lady Oyuki!
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301. You'll catch cold out here.
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302. Let's hurry back to the room.
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303. I'm afraid I can't do that.
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304. Because if I go back there...
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305. I'm a dead man!
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306. Gosh...
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307. Well, you can just rest here for now.
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308. Achoo!
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309. Oh my. Are you running a fever?
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310. Lady Oyuki!
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311. You seem to be getting hotter
and hotter by the minute, sir.
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312. Of course. It's because you're just
too beautiful to look at.
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313. Oh! We mustn't!
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314. Don't give in to temptation! It's too obscene!
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315. Wh-whoa! You're way more aggressive
than I thought, Lady Oyuki!
Oh my! This is so wrong!
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316. Wh-whoa! You're way more aggressive
than I thought, Lady Oyuki!
Please don't go any further, sir!
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317. D-damn, I can't hold back anymore!
Please don't go any further, sir!
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318. But this is forbidden love.
You're already married to Lum, aren't you?
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319. Be that as it may,
we've already come too far to stop!
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320. Oh my! How outrageous!
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321. We mustn't engage in such
vulgar deeds, good sir!
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322. It's too much! Ahhhh!
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323. BWAAAAAARGH!
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324. Wh-what the hell?
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325. That's my manservant, B-Bo.
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326. He cherishes me like
an elder sister, you see.
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327. You better get your grubby hands
off my mistress, little man!
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328. Holy crap! It's a friggin' yeti!
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329. B-Bo! Stop that!
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330. B-Bo!
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331. And just when things were getting good...
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332. What was that? An earthquake?
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333. Get over here!
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334. I'm gonna tear you to shreds!
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335. GRRR
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336. Lord help me!
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337. Ataru!
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338. Where's my darling?
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339. He just jumped into the portal
with some big yeti!
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340. Argh!
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341. I wanted to strangle him
with my own two hands!
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342. What a disaster.
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343. B-Bo is being far too rough
with my precious guest.
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344. We've got a visual on the Moroboshi house
in Tomobiki Town now. Over.
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345. What in god's name is that monster?
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346. Darling, you big dummy!
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347. B-Bo! Please come down!
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348. YETI ATTACK IN THE HEART OF TOKYO!
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349. Man trapped in its
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350. clutches atop a roof
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351. Police and firefighters
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352. left dumbfounded
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353. Yuki-onna and her secret lover
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354. Ataru Moroboshi
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355. It's all over the news today.
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356. You better learn your lesson from this!
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357. Yeah, whatever.
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358. Please just hurry up and
close that damn portal already.
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359. You're back here again, B-Bo?
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360. Seriously. My cold is never
gonna get better at this rate.
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361. Speaking of which,
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362. Mendo's taken every day off
from school ever since we came back...
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363. Only one man stayed behind, huh?
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364. I was on the verge of having Lum's
husband wrapped around my finger.
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365. It's such a shame...
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366. You're such a stud!
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367. Keep shoveling, hot stuff!
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368. Earth guys are so amazing!
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369. Anything for you ladies!
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370. What a gentleman!
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371. You can do it!
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372. We love you!
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373. And with that, the first semester
of this year comes to an end.
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374. Make sure to do your summer homework.
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375. That's all!
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376. Darling! Let's walk home together!
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377. Wait just a minute.
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378. Hold the phone!
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379. I have an important announcement to make!
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380. Everyone get back to your seats!
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381. Huh? What's this about?
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382. Quiet down!
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383. Ahem.
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384. As you know, I am Ataru Moroboshi.
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385. And as of today...
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386. I will be retiring!
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387. PAFOOOOOOOM!
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388. Ataru Retires
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389. Well, catch you on the flip side.
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390. Hold on, Moroboshi!
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391. Don't bother trying to stop me.
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392. There's nothing left to say.
We're done here.
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393. I'm leaving now.
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394. Have you talked with
our parents about this?
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395. I'm not a kid.
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396. I can make this decision on my own.
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397. That may be, but you're still a minor!
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398. How do you intend to live?
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399. By doing what I've always done.
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400. Now I'll just have a little more freedom.
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401. I'm sorry, Moroboshi.
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402. Huh?
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403. I never intended for that
report card I gave you earlier
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404. to drive you to such extremes.
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405. Wh-what do you mean by that?
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406. It's true...
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407. your grades are the worst I've ever seen!
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408. They hurt just to look at!
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409. But it's all my fault!
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410. I should have taken your report card
and burned it to ashes!
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411. Dude! What are you talking about?
This is embarrassing!
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412. I knew Ataru's grades were bad,
but not THAT bad.
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413. I didn't really give a damn
about my grades before,
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414. but now it's actually hurting my pride...
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415. Hold on. Then why did you
suddenly decide to quit coming here?
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416. I didn't say anything about quitting school!
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417. What I'm retiring from is...
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418. Cla-!
Moroboshi! You've made a wise choice.
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419. Moroboshi! You've made a wise choice.
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420. We get it. You don't have to say anything else.
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421. I'm not sure you actually get it at all.
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422. I've always thought you were totally unfit
for all the responsibilities that you have.
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423. Quit taking pot shots at me, dude.
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424. Listen, everyone. Moroboshi is...
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425. retiring from being the
main character of Urusei Yatsura!
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426. FLOPPO!
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427. I figured that's what he meant.
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428. I never thought he was a good fit, anyway.
Copy !req
429. Who do you think will be
the main character now?
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430. What's the deal, Mendo?
You seem awfully chipper.
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431. Come on. Based on looks there's no question
that the next best candidate is...
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432. Me, of course!
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433. Main Character
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434. Cherry? Where the hell'd you come from?
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435. Well, I heard you were having a contest
for the next main character...
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436. Just look at these simple lines!
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437. And my charming face!
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438. SMACK!
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439. You must be out of your mind!
Have some shame!
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440. Oh! It's Nurse Sakura!
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441. Stop showing up
when it makes no lick of sense!
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442. It's humiliating, darn it!
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443. What are you doing here, Sakura?
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444. Well, you know.
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445. I need to give a speech and greet everyone.
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446. After all...
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447. I'm going to be the main character now.
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448. You're no different from Cherry.
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449. I wanna be the main character, too!
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450. But I'm the best fit.
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451. No, it's obviously me.
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452. No, me!
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453. You all need to quit with this nonsense!
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454. It's too late to change the status quo now!
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455. Yeah, she's right!
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456. I've always been the
main character of this show!
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457. I'm the main character, dammit!
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458. Are you sure it's not me?
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459. I've been the main character
since episode 1!
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460. Yeah, but you're going to retire, right?
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461. Sorry to keep you waiting!
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462. Is this where the main character
contest is happening?
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463. Come along, everyone.
This seems to be the place.
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464. Whoa! What the hell?
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465. People from across the universe have come
to take their shot at being main character.
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466. So many rivals...
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467. I guess everyone was feeling
pretty unhappy
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468. with you in the main character
spot, Moroboshi.
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469. I think it's time for us to make it clear
who reigns supreme.
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470. Then let's make this a
contest of physical strength!
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471. The hopes of my whole planet
are riding on my shoulders,
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472. so I can't afford to lose.
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473. I'm always raring for
more screentime, ya know!
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474. What are you going to do, Ataru?
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475. All I wanted...
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476. WAS RETIRE FROM BEING THE
CLASS PRESIDENT, GODDAMMIIIIIIIT!
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477. Class President
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478. Wait, you're the class president?
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479. Why not just quit?
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480. I'm the real main character, of course!
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481. Home Is Where You Find It
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482. Marine Garbage Disposal
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483. On the next episode of Urusei Yatsura!
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484. His name is Pochi!
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