Twin Peaks 1x4

1. Diane, 7:15 a.m.

2. I'll be heading to the sheriff's after breakfast.

3. From there, we'll be going on to Laura Palmer's funeral.

4. Good morning, Colonel Cooper.

5. Just "agent," Audrey. Special agent.

6. Special agent.

7. Would you care to join me for breakfast?

8. - I'm in a hurry. - For what?

9. Audrey, that perfume you're wearing is incredible.

10. - Do you really think so? - Yes, I do.

11. Please have a seat.

12. And would you write your name down for me? Here.

13. Okay.

14. There's something you'd like to tell me.

15. There is?

16. You slipped this note underneath my door night before last.

17. I did?

18. I wanted to help you. For Laura.

19. You said you and Laura weren't exactly friends.

20. We weren't friends, but I understood her better than the rest.

21. - What is One-Eyed Jack's? - It's a place up north.

22. Men go there.

23. What about women?

24. Women, you know, work there.

25. Did Laura work there?

26. I don't know.

27. Laura worked at my father's department store.

28. - Horne's. - He named it after himself.

29. Where at Horne's Department Store?

30. At the perfume counter.

31. - So did Ronette Pulaski. - Really?

32. Audrey, that rightward slant in your handwriting

33. indicates a romantic nature.

34. A heart that yearns. Be careful.

35. I do?

36. I'm gonna have to ask you to leave now.

37. Police business.

38. Thank you for talking to me.

39. - Trudy, two more coffees, please. - Mm.

40. Harry, Lucy.

41. It is an absolutely beautiful morning.

42. Short stack of griddlecakes, melted butter,

43. maple syrup, lightly heated, slice of ham.

44. Nothing beats the taste sensation when maple syrup collides with ham.

45. Griddlecakes, slice of ham.

46. Who killed Laura Palmer?

47. Ahh.

48. Let me tell you about the dream I had last night.

49. - Tibet? - No.

50. You were there. Lucy, so were you.

51. Harry, my dream is a code waiting to be broken.

52. Break the code, solve the crime.

53. "Break the code, solve the crime."

54. In my dream, Sarah Palmer has a vision of her daughter's killer.

55. Deputy Hawk sketched his picture.

56. I got a phone call from a one-armed man named Mike.

57. The killer's name was Bob.

58. Mike and Bobby?

59. No. It's a different Mike and a different Bob.

60. They lived above a convenience store.

61. They had a tattoo:

62. Fire, walk with me.

63. Mike couldn't stand the killing anymore, so he cut off his arm.

64. Bob vowed to kill again, so Mike shot him.

65. Do you know where dreams come from?

66. - Not specifically. - No.

67. Acetylcholine neurons fire high-voltage impulses

68. into the forebrain.

69. These impulses become pictures, the pictures become dreams.

70. But no one knows why we choose these particular pictures.

71. So, what was the end of this dream?

72. Suddenly, it was 25 years later.

73. I was old, sitting in a red room.

74. There was a midget in a red suit and a beautiful woman.

75. The little man told me that my favorite gum was coming back into style

76. and didn't his cousin look exactly like Laura Palmer? Which she did.

77. - What cousin? - The beautiful woman.

78. She's filled with secrets.

79. Sometimes her arms bend back.

80. Where she's from, the birds sing a pretty song

81. and there's always music in the air.

82. The midget did a dance.

83. Laura kissed me and she whispered the name of the killer in my ear.

84. Who was it?

85. I don't remember.

86. - Damn. - Damn.

87. Harry, our job is simple. Break the code, solve the crime.

88. Yeah?

89. Sheriff, I'm at the morgue and there's a big fight going on.

90. You hang on. I'll be right there.

91. That was Andy. There's a fight over at the morgue.

92. Albert.

93. You're the most cold-blooded man I've ever seen.

94. I've never met a man with so little regard for human frailty.

95. Have you no compassion?

96. I've got compassion running out of my nose, pal.

97. I'm the sultan of sentiment.

98. Dr. Hayward, I have traveled thousands of miles

99. and apparently several centuries to this forgotten sinkhole

100. in order to perform a series of tests.

101. I do not ask you to understand these tests.

102. I'm not a cruel man.

103. I just ask you to get the hell out of my way

104. so I can finish. Is that clear?

105. We are here to conduct Laura Palmer's body to the cemetery.

106. If you think we're gonna leave here without her, you are out of your mind.

107. All right, all right, all right.

108. Mr. Rosenfield, please.

109. Now, uh, Leland Palmer couldn't be with us today,

110. but I know I speak for everyone,

111. the Palmer family included,

112. when I say that, uh, we appreciate and understand the value of your work.

113. But as their representative,

114. I must insist that we consider the feelings

115. of the Palmer family as well.

116. Mr. Horne, I realize that your position in this fair community

117. pretty well guarantees venality, insincerity,

118. and a rather irritating method of expressing yourself.

119. Stupidity, however, is not a necessarily inherent trait.

120. Therefore, please listen closely. You can have a funeral any old time.

121. You dig a hole, you plant a coffin.

122. I, however, cannot perform these tests next year,

123. next month, next week or tomorrow.

124. I must perform them now.

125. I've got a lot of cutting and pasting to do,

126. so why don't you return to your porch rockers and resume whittling?

127. That does it. I'm taking charge of the body.

128. You don't touch Laura from this moment on.

129. What the hell do you think you're doing?

130. - Gentlemen. - Whoa!

131. - What's going on? - Thank God.

132. Cooper, this old fool is obstructing a criminal investigation. Cuff him.

133. He won't release Laura's body for the funeral. He's not human.

134. - What's the holdup? - Please, Cooper.

135. I do not suffer fools gladly and fools with badges, never.

136. I want no interference from this hulking boob. That clear?

137. I've had just about enough of your insults.

138. Oh, yeah?

139. Well, I've had about enough of, uh, morons and half-wits,

140. dolts, dunces, dullards and dumbbells.

141. And you, chowderhead yokel, you blithering hayseed,

142. you've had enough of me?

143. Yes, I have.

144. Ugh. Oh, that's nice. How appropriate.

145. Wait in the car, Harry.

146. The old rustic sucker punch, huh?

147. - A hail of bullets would be nice. - That's enough.

148. The sheriff didn't mean anything.

149. - He hit me. - Well, I'm sure he meant to do that.

150. Albert, I want you to release this girl's body to her family immediately.

151. I want your test results by noon. Those are orders.

152. Thank you, Agent Cooper.

153. Invitation to Love.

154. Starring Martin Hadley as Chet,

155. Selena Swift as Emerald and Jade,

156. Evan St. Vincent as Jared Lancaster

157. and Jason Dembo as Montana.

158. My darling daughter, Jade,

159. and Emerald,

160. because of my financial difficulties, I have decided to end it all tonight.

161. I hope you can find the strength to go on without me.

162. Your loving father, Jared.

163. - Uncle Leland? - Daddy, it's Jade.

164. - Uncle Leland. - Please. I know you're in there.

165. Madeleine?

166. Jade, what a surprise, I...

167. Maddy?

168. Is it you?

169. Uncle Leland,

170. I am so sorry.

171. I'm sure Hank appreciates your unwavering devotion.

172. Your husband has been a model prisoner,

173. an inspiration to guard and inmate alike.

174. He greets the day with a smile

175. and confounds adversity with a kind word.

176. Hank's parole hearing is scheduled for tomorrow.

177. Barring unforeseen circumstance, with your full support before the board,

178. he could be released shortly thereafter.

179. Any questions?

180. No.

181. Will you help find the job that Hank needs

182. to effect a successful parole?

183. - Yes. - How exactly?

184. I own the Double R, Mr. Mooney.

185. Oh.

186. You're quite a girl, Norma.

187. I'll bet you get all kinds of Romeos in here, uh, begging for favors.

188. How do you keep them from your door?

189. I usually tell them I have a homicidally jealous husband

190. who's doing three-to-five for manslaughter,

191. but he expects to be a productive member of society real soon.

192. Well, now, that should conclude our session for today, Mrs. Jennings.

193. Look at that.

194. Ducks on the lake.

195. So fill me in on Leo Johnson.

196. Leo's one of those guys you keep on a list and you keep your eye on.

197. So far, we haven't caught him with his paws in the cookie jar.

198. Morning, Leo.

199. Who the hell is he?

200. This is Special Agent Cooper, FBI.

201. We'd like to ask you a couple of questions.

202. So ask.

203. Leo, is that short for Leonard?

204. That's a question?

205. - Did you know Laura Palmer? - No.

206. - How well did you know her? - I said I didn't.

207. You're lying.

208. I knew who she was, all right? Everybody did.

209. - Do you have a criminal record, Leo? - Nothing. You can look it up.

210. Illegal U-turn, April 1986.

211. Drunk and disorderly, November 1987.

212. September '88, aggravated assault, charges dropped.

213. I paid my debt to society.

214. Where were you the night of Laura Palmer's murder?

215. - Around midnight. - On the road.

216. I called my wife, Shelly, around that time from Butte, Montana.

217. - She'll confirm this? - She will if you ask her.

218. Robbie.

219. This may be a good time for a brief discussion.

220. You wanna talk about cigarettes? Today?

221. No, but put it out.

222. It's a filthy habit, especially for a varsity athlete.

223. Yeah, I've attended my share of funerals.

224. Too many.

225. Any time a man dies in war, he dies too soon.

226. Laura died too soon as well.

227. Yeah, she did.

228. But we have a responsibility to the dead, Robert.

229. Responsibility is the linchpin of our society.

230. Each man responsible for his own actions,

231. each action contributing to the greater good.

232. What's the good of putting someone in the ground?

233. Well, it's man's way of achieving closure.

234. In ceremony begins understanding,

235. and the will to carry on without those we must leave behind.

236. Robert, in your life you must learn,

237. you will learn, to carry on without them.

238. Great.

239. Now, I realize you experience an ongoing disinclination

240. to enter fully into meaningful exchange.

241. This leads to stalemate

242. and a desire on my part to force certain wisdom upon you.

243. This isn't necessarily a bad thing.

244. Sometimes it's the best course available.

245. Son, don't be afraid.

246. We'll all be there together.

247. Afraid of what?

248. Well, the funeral.

249. I'm not afraid of any damn funeral.

250. Afraid?

251. I can hardly wait.

252. Afraid?

253. I'm gonna turn it upside down!

254. Everybody ready?

255. Deputy Hawk.

256. Agent Cooper, there's no sign of the man with one arm.

257. Keep trying. He's out there somewhere.

258. If anyone can find him, Hawk can.

259. - He's a tracker? - The best.

260. Oh.

261. Okay, Albert, what do you got?

262. Enough forensic spadework to save your butt

263. and get mine out of this godforsaken burg.

264. What do you got?

265. Okay, first of all, contents of envelope found in Palmer diary, cocaine.

266. Toxicology results also positive.

267. the little lady had a habit.

268. Next, we've got fibers of twine

269. embedded in her wrists and upper arms.

270. Two different kinds of twine.

271. Fibers of twine found in the railroad car.

272. Matched the sample from her wrist.

273. The same twine was used to bind the wrists of the Pulaski girl.

274. she was tied up twice

275. at different locations on the night of her death.

276. Once here and once here.

277. Like this:

278. Sometimes my arms bend back.

279. Here we've got traces of pumice found in standing water

280. outside the railroad car.

281. Soap, industrial strength.

282. I found identical particles on the back of Laura's neck.

283. It's not her home-use brand.

284. My conclusion,

285. the killer washed his hands and then leaned in for a kiss.

286. Like this:

287. Good Lord.

288. Uh, distinctive wounds found on Laura's neck and shoulder

289. appear to be claw marks, bites of some kind.

290. An animal.

291. Look, it's trying to think.

292. Finally, a small plastic fragment from her stomach

293. partially dissolved by digestive acids.

294. I'm taking it back for reconstruction,

295. as the local facilities give new meaning to the word "primitive."

296. I note with some interest what appears to be the letter J.

297. Good work, Albert.

298. A couple more days with the body, who knows what I might have found?

299. Sheriff, it's time.

300. Excuse us. We have got a funeral to get to.

301. Cooper, may I have a word with you alone?

302. There's one more item. It's a report concerning the assault on my person

303. which you witnessed.

304. I think you'll find it's quite accurate. Requires your signature.

305. Albert, I'm not gonna sign this.

306. What?

307. Albert, I hope you can hear me.

308. I have only been in Twin Peaks a short time,

309. but in that time, I have seen decency, honor and dignity.

310. Murder is not a faceless event here.

311. It is not a statistic to be tallied up at the end of the day.

312. Laura Palmer's death has affected each and every man, woman and child

313. because life has meaning here. Every life.

314. That's a way of living I thought had vanished.

315. But it hasn't, Albert. It's right here in Twin Peaks.

316. Sounds like you've been snacking on some of the local mushrooms.

317. With your behavior towards these good people,

318. consider yourself lucky I do not file a report of my own

319. that could bury you in a building so deep you'd never see the sun.

320. Diane, it's 12:27 p.m.

321. I'd like you to look into my pension-plan options

322. regarding outside real-estate investment.

323. I may look into purchasing property

324. at what I assume will be a very reasonable price.

325. Mm. Mm!

326. Love me?

327. You bet.

328. This a new one?

329. Yes.

330. Isn't it beautiful?

331. Oh.

332. How do I look?

333. Well, you look fine, Nadine.

334. Oh, Ed.

335. Last night was wonderful.

336. Oh, my darling Ed, you came back to me.

337. Now I feel like we're really together again.

338. Ed, in high school,

339. I used to watch Norma and you at those football games.

340. She was so pretty.

341. And you made such a handsome couple.

342. But I knew,

343. even though I was just

344. a little nobody,

345. just a little brown mouse,

346. I always knew inside,

347. once you got to know me,

348. we'd be together forever.

349. That's not your bike, is it, Ed?

350. It's James.

351. James who?

352. Oh.

353. We don't wanna be late. Are you ready?

354. I'm not going.

355. It's Laura, James.

356. I can't.

357. I just can't.

358. James.

359. I don't care what the doctor says.

360. If you keep indulging him this way, he is never going to change.

361. I don't think we should be discussing this

362. while Johnny's in the room.

363. Johnny doesn't even know what day it is.

364. - We have to be patient. - You be patient.

365. I have been waiting 20 years for some sign of intelligent life.

366. I'm clear about this, Sylvia. I have my limits.

367. Don't I know it.

368. My, let's all spray venom in my general direction.

369. You take it with no problem.

370. Taking it is the specialty of the house.

371. Sylvia, I'm going to make it extremely simple for you.

372. We can't take Johnny to the funeral in that ridiculous getup.

373. Let Dr. Jacoby see what he can do.

374. We gotta go.

375. No, no.

376. You do it, then.

377. Am I going to have to call Dr. Jacoby

378. every damn time I have a problem with Johnny?

379. Oh, thank God.

380. All right, let's everyone just get into the car.

381. I am the resurrection and the life.

382. He that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live.

383. And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die.

384. For none of us liveth to himself, and no man dieth to himself.

385. For if we live, we live unto the Lord.

386. And if we die, we die unto the Lord.

387. Whether we live, therefore, or we die,

388. we are the Lord's.

389. Blessed be the dead who die in the Lord,

390. even so sayeth the Spirit, for they rest from their labors.

391. The Lord be with thee.

392. Let us pray.

393. O God, entrust this child, Laura, to thy never-failing care and love,

394. and bring us all to thy heavenly kingdom,

395. through the same, thy son, Jesus Christ our Lord,

396. who liveth and reigneth with thee and the Holy Spirit.

397. One God, now and forever. Amen.

398. I baptized Laura Palmer.

399. I instructed her in Sunday school.

400. And I, like the rest of you, came to love her

401. with that special love that we reserve for the headstrong and the bold.

402. Laura was bright.

403. She was beautiful, she was charming.

404. But most of all, Laura was, I think, impatient.

405. She was impatient for her life to begin,

406. for the world to finally catch up to her dreams and ambitions.

407. Laura used to say that I talked too much.

408. I'll not make that mistake today.

409. Just let it be said that I loved her,

410. and I will miss her the rest of my days.

411. Amen.

412. Amen.

413. Thank you, Johnny.

414. Amen!

415. What are you looking at?

416. What are you waiting for?

417. You make me sick.

418. You damn hypocrites make me sick!

419. Everybody knew she was in trouble.

420. But we didn't do anything.

421. All you good people.

422. You wanna know who killed Laura?

423. You did!

424. We all did.

425. And pretty words aren't gonna bring her back, man, so save your prayers.

426. She would've laughed at them anyway.

427. You are dead, man. You're dead.

428. That's enough, Bobby. That's enough.

429. You're dead!

430. Get off me.

431. You're a dead man. Dead.

432. You're dead, man. Gah! Dead.

433. That's enough. Come on.

434. Get off me.

435. Agh!

436. My baby. Laura.

437. Laura, no.

438. - Hang on. - Can you reach him?

439. No...

440. The whole thing has gone haywire.

441. Don't ruin this too.

442. My baby.

443. Laura.

444. Laura.

445. So here's the guy, right. He was the father.

446. And this is his daughter in the coffin. He goes, boom!

447. I'm telling you, Harry, he's just not gonna figure this out.

448. Ed, that's a bet I'll take for the check.

449. He's right on time.

450. Harry, careful who you trust. He's just not one of us.

451. Cooper, take a seat.

452. Harry, I got your note. Hawk, Big Ed.

453. How would you like some fresh huckleberry pie?

454. I would love a slice of pie.

455. Norma, slice of huckleberry pie, heated,

456. vanilla ice cream on the side, coffee.

457. Coming right up.

458. Big Ed, how long you been in love with Norma?

459. Ed, looks like pie and coffee's on you.

460. Okay, what did you call me in to talk about

461. besides the highlights of the dinner menu?

462. You better tell him.

463. Somebody's running drugs into Twin Peaks from across the border.

464. We've been working this for months, trying to set up a bust.

465. - Top to bottom. Nobody walks. - Who's targeted?

466. Jacques Renault, bartender at the Roadhouse.

467. We figure him for the middleman.

468. Now, Ed's been doing some undercover.

469. In fact, the night you got into town, he was staking Renault out.

470. We think Renault slipped him a mickey.

471. Felt like somebody hit me with a log splitter.

472. Ed, I didn't know you were a deputy.

473. He's not.

474. Well, it's a little outside your jurisdiction, don't you think?

475. Somebody's selling drugs to high school kids,

476. and I figure that's everybody's jurisdiction.

477. I call Ed in when I need him.

478. He's not the only one I call.

479. - Thanks, Norma. - Enjoy.

480. Mm.

481. This must be where pies go when they die.

482. Okay, Harry, would you please tell me why you really called me in here?

483. You're gonna have to go along with me on this

484. even if it sounds a little weird.

485. - I'm with you. - Twin Peaks is different.

486. A long way from the world. You've noticed that.

487. Yes, I have.

488. And that's exactly the way we like it.

489. But there's a back end to that that's kind of different too.

490. Maybe that's the price we pay for all the good things.

491. - What would that be? - There's a sort of evil out there.

492. Something very, very strange in these old woods.

493. Call it what you want:

494. a darkness, a presence.

495. It takes many forms,

496. but it's been out there for as long as anyone can remember.

497. And we've always been here to fight it.

498. We?

499. Men before us.

500. Men before them.

501. More after we're gone.

502. A secret society.

503. Why don't we take Agent Cooper for a little ride?

504. - Where to? - The Bookhouse.

505. This is where we get together.

506. Going on 20 years now.

507. "We" meaning?

508. The Bookhouse Boys.

509. - Coffee's free. - Like the sound of that.

510. Cooper, you know James.

511. - Agent Cooper. - James.

512. - This is Joey Paulson. - Joey.

513. Who's this?

514. Bernard Renault, Jacques' brother.

515. Janitor at the Roadhouse.

516. Bernard came across the border this morning

517. with an ounce of cocaine in his kit bag.

518. Thought we'd ask him a few questions.

519. Did you ever sell drugs to Laura Palmer?

520. I don't sell drugs.

521. How much does Jacques pay you to be the mule?

522. Jacques don't pay me nothing. I'm no mule.

523. So that ounce you had, that was for personal use?

524. That's right.

525. Guess you don't get a whole lot of sleep at night, then, huh, Bernie?

526. Your brother didn't come into work the last few days. Where's he been?

527. I don't know.

528. He got personal business.

529. Who else is he dealing with?

530. Why don't you ask him yourself?

531. He be back tonight. Any minute.

532. He's coming to work at the Roadhouse?

533. He the bartender, isn't he?

534. Bernard, we've got you tied up in a chair.

535. You're mixed up with your brother in a wide variety of felonies.

536. What I wanna know is, why in the world would you tell us

537. where and when to find him?

538. - Yeah? - Leo.

539. - It's Jacques. - What's up?

540. The light. The bust light's on.

541. - Bernard's in trouble. - You sure?

542. I saw it, man.

543. You gotta get me out of here, Leo. Border run.

544. - Where are you? - Phone booth by the cash and carry.

545. And I don't like waiting, man.

546. Shut up. I'm on my way.

547. Hi.

548. - Where you going? - You don't need to know.

549. Josie.

550. Josie, what's wrong?

551. Nothing.

552. - Nothing? - Mm.

553. God, you're beautiful.

554. Josie, there is something wrong.

555. What is it? I want you to tell me.

556. Something horrible is going to happen.

557. - They wanna hurt me. I know it. - Who?

558. Who wants to hurt you?

559. Catherine.

560. Catherine and Benjamin Horne.

561. What makes you think so?

562. I heard Catherine on the phone saying I'd never suspect.

563. Just like with Andrew's death.

564. Andrew's death was an accident.

565. Was it?

566. Catherine keeps the mill account books in her safe.

567. Two books. Different numbers.

568. Andrew built this years ago.

569. I don't think Catherine knows that I know it's here.

570. Why do you think they have two sets of books?

571. The usual reasons would have something to do with stealing.

572. Maybe worse.

573. There were two. I saw them.

574. You believe me, don't you?

575. Of course I do.

576. There's nothing unusual in this one.

577. Oh, there were two.

578. I swear, there were two.

579. Have you seen my tackle box?

580. The next time you and the merry widow wanna take a peek in my safe,

581. don't go to so much trouble.

582. Be a man about it, Pete. Ask me to my face.

583. Maybe I'll, um, check the truck.

584. Dr. Jacoby.

585. I didn't see you at the funeral today.

586. I'm a terrible person, Agent Cooper.

587. I pretend that I'm not, but I am.

588. Oh, I sit and listen to their problems,

589. day after day.

590. These people think of me as their friend.

591. The truth is, I really don't care.

592. I thought nothing, no one,

593. could ever reach me again.

594. Laura changed all that.

595. I couldn't come today.

596. I just couldn't.

597. I hope she understands.

598. I hope she forgives me.

599. You think it's possible?

600. You think somebody killed Andrew?

601. I don't know.

602. I believe what they want is to take the mill away from me.

603. For Benjamin to have the land.

604. If it was true with Andrew,

605. you think they'll kill me too?

606. Think they would?

607. Josie,

608. nothing is gonna happen to you.

609. Not now, not ever. Not while I'm around.

610. Do you believe in the soul?

611. Several.

612. - More than one? - Blackfoot legend.

613. Waking souls that give life to the mind and the body.

614. A dream soul that wanders.

615. Dream souls.

616. - Where do they wander? - Faraway places.

617. The Land of the Dead.

618. Is that where Laura is?

619. Laura's in the ground, Agent Cooper.

620. That's the only thing I'm sure of.

621. To Laura.

622. Godspeed.

623. - Will you dance with me? - No.

624. - Sorry, pal. - Please.

625. - Dance with me? - No.

626. - Please. - That's kind of rude, mister.

627. - Dance with me. - Come on, leave us alone.

628. Dance with me, please?

629. Please.

630. Somebody dance with me.

631. Mr. Palmer? Leland.

632. Let's take you home.

633. Home.