1. - Look at all this trampled!
- Alright, calm down.
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2. Look at all the weed
that's fucking ruined!
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3. Look at this, boys.
This is fucking snapped.
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4. These are all fucking trampled
There's a god-damned road
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5. running through here. Everything
was going so fucking good.
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6. All the plants were growing.
We planted all four fields
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7. They were growing a lot bigger
than I expected.
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8. No! Something had to fuck it up.
Now I've got weed being crushed,
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9. plants snapped off.
And something or something
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10. is fucking around here
and it's pissing me off.
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11. Somebody is definitely fucking
with our weed.
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12. Or "something" is.
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13. - Here, boys.
- Potato guns.
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14. You just spray hairspray
in the bottom there
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15. and then hit it
with these barbeque lighters
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16. and a fucking potato will shoo
t out of there about 400 MPH
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17. Here's the hairspray, boys
Here's the lighters. Okay?
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18. Be careful,
'cause they really fucking hurt.
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19. I shot myself in the face
by accident one time.
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20. Come on, man.
Why don't we got real guns
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21. Do you want to go to jail?
Don't screw this up, Corey
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22. - Geez!
- Yeah, don't fuck this up
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23. - Yo, we got this.
- You're making me look bad.
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24. Are you guys fucked in the head?
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25. We're over here.
Take off the blindfolds.
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26. And don't fuck those up.
They're my hockey socks.
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27. Trevor, hands down.
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28. Listen.
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29. - What the fuck is that?
- Listen.
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30. Holy fuck, boys,
what if it's a Samsquantch
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31. It could be.
They don't exist, Bubbles.
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32. Julian, you try telling that
to all the people
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33. that got eaten by them.
Dirty bastards.
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34. Boys, I'll tell you who it is.
It's probably fucking Lahey.
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35. God, I hope
it's not a Samsquantch.
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36. Fuck, I hate those bastards.
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37. Holy shit! Holy fuck!
Get the fuck off!
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38. Ow! Fuck! Ow!
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39. Help me, Corey!
Jesus, fuck!
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40. Ow, fuck! I'm fucking shot
, you idiots! Fuck!
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41. You alright, man?
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42. Fuck, something's got them
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43. - Come on, get up.
- Boys!
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44. What the fuck
is going on over there?
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45. Boys, what was it?
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46. Man, I don't fucking know.
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47. Omigod, boys.
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48. We are officially dealing
with a fucking Samsquantch
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49. It's probably a ten-footer
, by the looks of that stuff
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50. Could somebody check and
see if my back's cut up, please?
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51. Turn around.
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52. - Holy shit, dude.
- Oh, yeah, yeah. He'll be okay.
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53. Can we get the fuck out
of here, please?
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54. We should probably get these
guys to the hospital anyway.
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55. - Boys, no fucking way, man.
- Come on, Ricky, I'm scared
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56. We gotta leave these guys here
to protect the weed plants
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57. No, no, no.
These guys are hurt, Ricky
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58. We're taking them back
to the park.
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59. We gotta regroup and figure ou
t what the hell that thing was
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60. They're not getting in m
y fucking car. They're bleeding.
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61. - Come on.
- Blood doesn't come out, boys
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62. You're not fucking
getting in my car.
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63. Here, Ricky, give me
the chips. Hold this, Julian
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64. Here.
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65. Here.
Ow! Fuck, Bubbles,
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66. they're salt-and-vinegar.
Ow, what are you doing?
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67. - Bandages.
- You know what?
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68. U All you guys do now is complain.
I'm gonna start calling yo
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69. "little complainey twins."
How would you like that?
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70. We're not that hurt, Ricky. We
can probably finish the shift.
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71. We can go back to work.
Let's go, Corey.
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72. Oh, no, boys, let's go.
We'll get you fixed up.
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73. You're gonna fucking bleed
to death. Come on.
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74. Fuck, boys, the lights are on.
She's probably fucking awake
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75. She's gonna be wild, Ricky
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76. - I did try. I tried...
- Shhh!
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77. - Ow! Oh, that's awful.
- Guys, listen to me-
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78. - Where the fuck
have you guys been?
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79. You guys are gonna have to
work in the morning, alright
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80. Holy fuck. What happened t
o you guys? What'd you do, Ricky
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81. Nothing. You know what?
We found these guys drunk
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82. in a ditch. They were on drugs
, beating each other up.
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83. As a friend, I brought them home
so they didn't hurt each other
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84. They'll tell you some othe
r lies, but that's what happened
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85. - That's bullshit, Ricky.
- Trevor, smokes, let's go
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86. - Trevor, don't you dare.
- Trevor, let's go.
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87. Let's go.
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88. I only have one left. I wann
a save it for the morning.
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89. - Trevor, give me the smoke.
- Give me that fucking smoke
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90. Let's go.
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91. You know what, Ricky? I know
you didn't find them drunk
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92. You took them out
and you fucked them over again
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93. e Do you know these guys
talk about how cool you ar
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94. d all the fucking time? They
worship the fucking groun
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95. you walk on
and you treat them like shit
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96. You should try being nice
to them for a change.
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97. - We love you, Ricky.
- Hands down, you guys.
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98. Trevor, let's go, light.
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99. You want to get into
this respect bullshit, okay,
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100. y I'm willing to give these
two guys the responsibilit
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101. of protecting the most important
thing in my life right now
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102. That's big-time
respect and trust.
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103. I'm gonna pay them
four bucks an hour.
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104. You don't get it, Julian
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105. I'm gonna take them inside
and get them cleaned up
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106. and you guys
can get the fuck out of here
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107. and take care of your own
little fucking dope plants
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108. Corey and Trevor,
inside right now. Go!
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109. I wouldn't mind making
four bucks an hour, Sarah.
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110. We'd love to hang out with you
guys and hire you,
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111. but apparently it's clear
who makes the pants here.
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112. Sarah, they wanna hang out
with us. Please.
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113. Inside, right now.
Right now. Go!
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114. What about tomorrow?
Can we have them tomorrow?
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115. No. You can't ever have them
again, Ricky. Go fuck yourself
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116. - Go fuck myself?
- Sorry, Sarah.
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117. Corey... we'll pick you guys
up tomorrow, alright?
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118. Boys, we gotta figure ou
t what the fuck that thing was
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119. and deal with this dope problem.
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120. We're not gonna have
enough money to buy the park
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121. if this keeps happening, boys.
We're fucked.
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122. I figured it out, man.
It's no big deal.
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123. I'm gonna get a tent
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124. and go fucking camp
in that field.
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125. Five, ten guns.
A big bag of dope.
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126. I'm gonna
fucking take care of it.
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127. I'm going to that field and on
e of us isn't coming out alive
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128. It's not gonna be me.
No guns, Ricky.
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129. Go to bed, alright?
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130. We've gotta get up
early tomorrow.
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131. Ricky, you can hang out
with me in my shed for a bit
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132. - Got any food?
- I got bologna.
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133. Julian, you want
a bologna sandwich?
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134. Slow-fry bologna?
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135. - I'll take one sandwich.
- Hang out with me for a bit
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136. Yeah, since, uh,
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137. Randy and I have been back
in charge,
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138. t we've been making great stride
s at collecting the back ren
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139. and beautifying Sunnyvale.
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140. Now Barb says that Ricky
and the jackass trio
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141. are threatening
to take it all away.
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142. Those idiots won't be buying
anything except a one-way ticket
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143. back to con college and
they'll be on full scholarship
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144. when they get there.
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145. Ricky, check this out. It'
s some kind of a nest or a bed
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146. or something, man.
Jesus Christ.
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147. Julian, I've been watching
the Crocodile Hunter, man,
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148. and it shouldn't be that fucking
hard to catch this thing.
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149. Boys, come here.
Look what I found!
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150. Here's where the big
son of a whore's been
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151. fucking running out
of the field.
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152. Holy fuck!
Look at all the weed.
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153. Bubbles, hold the binoculars
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154. If this thing is down there,
Julian, I want you to shoot him,
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155. t I'm gonna jump on top of
the cock-sucker with the ne
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156. and we're gonna have to beat
him with everything we got
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157. I could need some help
from you dicks, alright.
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158. You hear that there,
Mr. Microphone Man?
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159. If we get these thing down
you fucking jump in and help us!
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160. - Frig off, Ricky.
- Don't tell me to frig off.
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161. If he attacks you,
I'm not even gonna jump in
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162. Boys, I slipped in poop!
Bigfoot poop!
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163. Do I got Bigfoot poop on me?
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164. For fucksakes.
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165. Holy shit, boys, don't move.
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166. So that's who's been eatin
g our weed.
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167. You little fuck.
Okay, you guys stay here.
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168. I'll throw a net on him,
and choke him out.
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169. Ricky, put the net down.
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170. You're not fucking choking
him out.
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171. - Why?
- It's just a big kitty, boys.
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172. I can deal with this.
I know kitties.
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173. - What if he has radies?
- It's rabies, not radies.
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174. And he doesn't have rabies
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175. He's been eating weed
for a fucking month.
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176. He's baked out
of his goddamned mind.
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177. I can tell just the way
he's standing there.
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178. He only did that to Trevor
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179. because he had
that leopard-print jacket on
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180. See? H's just a big,
stoned, horny kitty
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181. with the munchies.
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182. Trevor was eating chips, too.
Who's a good boy?
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183. Bubbles, we gotta get ri
d of this fucking cat.
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184. Ricky, he's beautiful!
We're not getting rid of him
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185. We're taking him back
to the trailer park
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186. and putting him through rehab.
Come on, boy.
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187. Fuck.
Julian, this is fucked!
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188. Who's a good boy?
You look kind of French,
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189. with your little moustache
I'm gonna call you Steve French.
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190. That's a good name for you
Who's a good boy?
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191. Steve French. Boys, we gotta get
some food into Steve French,
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192. I'd say, or he's gonna
start getting wild again.
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193. What do you got to eat in there,
Julian?
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194. - I've got some fajitas.
- Fajitas will work perfect.
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195. All we gotta do is grind u
p a little bit of dope
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196. and put it in with them to start
weaning him off the stuff.
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197. Get some dope out, Ricky.
Come on, I know you got some
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198. I only got personal left. I'
not giving him any fucking dope.
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199. I know you got a bunch
in that Caddie. Go grab some
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200. Come on, he needs dope. He's
just a helpless little kitty
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201. Bubbles, listen to me. Thi
s isn't a helpless little kitty,
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202. this is a dangerous
fucking kitty.
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203. You know he's gotta go, right?
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204. Remember the saying "If you love
something, set it free"?
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205. I know. "If it comes back,
it's yours.
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206. If it doesn't, it never was.
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207. W I've heard it a thousand times
, but he needs our help right no
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208. and the best thing to do is to
get some weed in the fajitas
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209. Now let's do it.
This is all I got left.
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210. I'll give him some, but
I'm eating half those fajitas.
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211. You hear that, Steve, or
whatever the fuck your name is
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212. Steve French. Julian, don'
t let him eat all the fajitas.
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213. They're for Steve French.
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214. - Hands off the fajitas.
- I'm eating half of them!
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215. , - You hang on, okay, Steve French?
Climb up there
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216. hang out and give me two seconds
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217. and I'll have a big plate
of weed-jitas for ya.
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218. Mr. Lahey!
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219. There's...
there's a tiger outside.
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220. It's eating...
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221. it ate my cheeseburgers!
Mr. Lahey!
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222. Some kind of tiger.
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223. It attacked me.
It ate seven cheeseburgers
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224. You set up this elaborat
e charade to cover eating
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225. seven cheeseburgers?
You ate seven cheeseburgers?
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226. Randy, you promised me
this would never happen again.
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227. I'm not lying about this
It was a great big tiger thing
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228. Look, it puts it's teeth
right through the mustard
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229. and ate all the burgers!
I'm not lying, Mr. Lahey.
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230. Tiger, huh?
Steve French!
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231. Maybe those jerks
have something to do with this
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232. Lahey, did you see anythin
g weird going on around here
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233. Yeah, Randy just got attacke
d by a tiger.
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234. That's right.
It ate seven burgers, Julian
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235. - I'm calling the authorities.
- Lahey, think about that.
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236. D You're gonna call George Green
and tell him Randy got attacke
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237. by a tiger
that ate his cheeseburgers
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238. Come on, it was probably Randy.
It wasn't.
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239. Randy, get a net.
I'm gonna get my bow.
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240. I'm gonna the bottom of this
and you better not be behind it.
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241. Lahey, you're gonna look
like an idiot again. Fuck!
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242. Viagra?
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243. - Julian, we found him.
- Well, lock him in your shed.
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244. He was down, fucking aroun
d with Donnie's garbage
Copy !req
245. and then he pooped on the hood
of Mrs. Peterson's car.
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246. Alright, you go lay down right
there, Steve French, okay?
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247. And I'll be right with you
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248. You just have a nice nap.
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249. - Close it up, Ricky.
- Close it up, Julian.
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250. Boys, we gotta get some weed
into him, I'm telling you.
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251. Before we... let him go.
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252. What the fuck
are you guys doing?
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253. This is private fucking
property!
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254. We know there's a fuckin
g animal in here, Ricky.
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255. Tracks lead right to shit-town
What the fuck's going on?
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256. What the hell are you talkin
g about, Lahey, you idiot?
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257. Look, this is none
of your fucking business.
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258. We know what's going on here
You're trying to fill my feet.
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259. Guess what, Lahey,
you will never, ever
Copy !req
260. be the fucking trailer-par
k supervisor I was. Got that
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261. You're fucking losing it, bud.
You know what, Ricky?
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262. You already lost it.
It's gone, bud.
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263. Whatever it is,
whatever you are - gone.
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264. He who looks into the abys s
Copy !req
265. realizes that there's nothin
g looking back at him.
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266. They only thing he sees
Copy !req
267. is his own character, Ricky.
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268. You understand, bud?
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269. The abyss?
The shit abyss?
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270. Means deep stuff, Ricky.
You wouldn't understand.
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271. What does it mean, then,
Randy? Huh?
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272. What the fuck does it mean?
I understand it.
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273. Oh, you do, do you? No,
you don't. Because it's fucked
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274. Because everything you asshole
say you fucking take from books.
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275. Guess what, I don't steal
anything from books.
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276. You guys get the fuck out of
here. Get the fuck out of here
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277. I'm serious.
Fucking take your net with you
Copy !req
278. - Frig off, Ricky!
- Oh, we caught a little animal!
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279. Oh, there's a big fucking animal
in the trailer park!
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280. Fucking dicks.
Get the fuck out of here!
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281. Shit abyss. I'm not scared o
f the shit abyss. Lahey's fucked
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282. s - Yeah, well if Lahey
sees Steve French and call
Copy !req
283. the Department of Lands
and Forests, we're fucked, boys.
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284. What the fuck would they do?
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285. Did you see that tattoo
under Steve French's ear?
Copy !req
286. - No.
- Well, there's one there
Copy !req
287. and they use it for tracking
They'll be able to track him
Copy !req
288. right back to our dope field
Cops, jail. Fuck jail.
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289. I'm not going back to jail
, Ricky. Not gonna happen.
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290. Julian, don't be dissing jail.
We've had some good
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291. fucking parties in there.
We have good friends in there.
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292. They fed you, you use their gym.
Come on, don't be dissing jail
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293. It's not fucking cool.
Boys, boys, boys.
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294. Right now,
we gotta find somewhere
Copy !req
295. to put Steve French for a little
while. That's the task at hand
Copy !req
296. Over where J-Roc
used to hide his skin mags
Copy !req
297. Come on, Steve French.
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298. I don't know, boys. He might
get scared under there.
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299. He'll be fine, Bubbles.
It's just for an hour or so,
Copy !req
300. until we can figure
something out.
Copy !req
301. You hide under there,
and we'll be back for you.
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302. Alright, boys, I'll go-
Copy !req
303. J- Roc?
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304. Who let that thing
out of the zoo?
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305. J-Roc?
Copy !req
306. What are you mo-fuckers doin
g here, know what I'm saying
Copy !req
307. Boys, calm down.
That's my kitty in there.
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308. You need to control
that mo-fucker, man.
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309. - He won't hurt you. He's just-
- Yeah, okay. A lion, yeah
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310. What the fuck are you doin
g here? Thought you were in jail
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311. Mo-fucker, as far as you'r
e concerned I am in jail,
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312. know what I'm saying?
My moms don't even know, yo.
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313. He only got sentenced
to community service, man,
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314. and community service
does not sell records, man
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315. Alright, alright.
So let me get this straight.
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316. You're hiding
underneath the trailer,
Copy !req
317. pretending you're in jail?
I ain't pretending! Alright,
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318. I am pretending I'm in jail.
I had no idea. I thought
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319. Don't tell nobody, though!
Copy !req
320. Can we talk about
getting some weed
Copy !req
321. into Steve French
and calming him down?
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322. Bubbles, where the fuck
did you find a lion at, man?
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323. I ain't going back there.
Fuck that, man!
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324. Ah, fuck! He's gone!
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325. Trevor, what the hell
are you doing in our trailer
Copy !req
326. What are you doing?
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327. Trevor!
Stop, drop and roll, Trevor!
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328. That's for fire, Randy.
Trevor, ball up, boy!
Copy !req
329. Trevor, ball up, make yourself
as small as possible!
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330. Trevor, what the fuck
is going on here?
Copy !req
331. I don't want to talk about it.
Leave me alone.
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332. Jesus, why does he have
no pants on?
Copy !req
333. Your tiger was chasing Trevor,
who hid inside the trailer
Copy !req
334. Then he went that way.
Which way?
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335. Omigod.
Did he do things to Trevor
Copy !req
336. Yeah, he did, Bubbles.
That's the last straw.
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337. I'm gonna call in the heavies.
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338. Mr. Lahey, please.
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339. Can you please,
please, don't do that?
Copy !req
340. This is a dangerous situation,
Bubbles. I have no choice
Copy !req
341. but as Trailer Park Supervisor
to make the call.
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342. Fuck you, Lahey
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343. and your little Trailer
Park Supervisor bullshit!
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344. You don't even know
what a fucking supervisor is
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345. Randy, where is he?
He went that way, Ricky.
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346. Jim, Jim. You sure
you want to do that?
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347. Cause it'd be a real shame I
f everybody in this trailer park
Copy !req
348. knew about those Viagra burgers.
I'll tell Ricky.
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349. Alright, Julian,
Copy !req
350. you have two hours to get
the situation under control.
Copy !req
351. Thanks, Jim.
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352. Here kitty, kitty.
Steve French!
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353. Steve French!
Julian, this is fucked, man.
Copy !req
354. S We gotta deal with this.
First, it fucks over 50 gram
Copy !req
355. worth of dope,
now it's fucking over the park
Copy !req
356. Ricky, we're getting that ca
t out of here today.
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357. Steve French! Here you are
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358. one,
Steve French: zero.
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359. Mm, turkey and garbage juice.
Copy !req
360. Steve French, Steve French
, you just relax, okay?
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361. Who's a good boy?
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362. You go lay down.
Ah, fuck!
Copy !req
363. Listen, you can hear him
He's in there,
Copy !req
364. that's who did it.
Yeah, I hear him.
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365. N Ricky, you want to tell
me why there's a mountain lio
Copy !req
366. trying to bang
one of my boyfriends?
Copy !req
367. - There isn't.
- Look, I can explain it all
Copy !req
368. I know he looks like
a big, ferocious crazy thing
Copy !req
369. But he's not. He's just
a little kitty at heart
Copy !req
370. and he's mixed up
'cause he's hooked on the weed
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371. , Trevor, if you took this off
, that has the leopard on it
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372. he probably wouldn't try
to do things to you.
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373. , He wasn't trying to kill you
, he just found you attractive
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374. probably, 'cause you do kind
of have a long slender body.
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375. Fucked up again, Trevor.
Nice going.
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376. Let's go, fuck!
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377. Ricky, get this cat out of
here or I'm pressing charges
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378. There are kids that live here,
for godssake.
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379. You know, children, family
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380. I know what fucking kids are
! I'm a hell of a lot better dad
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381. than you'll ever fucking be.
You have no idea
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382. how stupid you are, do you?
Actually, yes, I do.
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383. All he needs is, like, 125 tins
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384. of really high-quality cat foo
d
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385. and that will distract him
from the weed. I promise.
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386. He's not a bad kitty.
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387. Not that much weed, Ricky,
that's good.
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388. We're trying to wean him off the
stuff, not get him hooked on it.
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389. You can't get addicted to weed.
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390. You did a good thing here.
I know. Look at him go.
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391. He doesn't need hardly any wee d
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392. and he's all calm.
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393. I could keep you forever.
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394. Bubbles, he's not a shed kitty.
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395. He belongs in the wild.
You know that.
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396. Yeah, Bubbles, I mean, look,
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397. we'll just take him
and we'll let him go free.
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398. Just like a little test.
And if he comes back,
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399. it forever was,
just like the saying.
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400. It's the best thing for him.
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401. I know. Well, we're gonn
a have to take him
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402. o to the other side of
the mountain to let him g
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403. and we'll just have to modif
y one of my food dispensers
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404. to put a little less weed
in his food every day.
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405. That should work fine, I guess
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406. There's no fool
like an old fool.
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407. The shit abyss.
Hey, boys.
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408. Hey, Jules.
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409. We're taking the mountain lion
out of the park now.
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410. Thanks for not being a dic
k on this one, Jim.
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411. - No problem.
- Appreciate it.
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412. Oooh.
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413. He's wasted, Julian.
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414. I didn't tell anybody
about that Viagra thing, okay?
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415. Does that stuff work?
Oh, yeah.
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416. The shit abyss.
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417. Mr. Lahey, not another night
of the shit abyss.
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418. Please!
Oh, fuck it..
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419. Come on, Steve French,
in you go.
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420. We're going for a little drive
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421. There you go.
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422. - What's that fucking smell?
- Keep driving, Rick.
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423. Steve, I know
you didn't shit on my seat
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424. No, everything's cool, Rick.
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425. - Ricky?
- What?
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426. Steve French pooped on the seat.
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427. Come on, Steve French.
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428. Come on now, look. Come here
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429. Now I rigged this dope
contraption up for you.
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430. And the way I got it geared,
a little less dope
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431. will come out each time.
Aw, you don't give a fuck!
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432. Look, you just press your pa
w onto there. Like that, see
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433. And then the dope
will drop out here, okay?
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434. It's time, buddy.
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435. Rick.
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436. Okay, come here, little buddy.
I'm gonna unhook you.
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437. You're free.
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438. - Ah, fuck.
- Shit!
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439. Boys. If you love something,
you set it free
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440. and if it comes back to you,
it's yours.
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441. But you can't keep him, buddy.
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442. If it comes back, it's yours
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443. You gotta get out now.
I gotta take you to the wild
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444. Come on, Steve French.
Come on now, look.
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445. This is for the best,
apparently,
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446. so you're gonna have
to go now. So go on, git.
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447. Go on. Get going
and stop looking at me
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448. with those big fucking cut e
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449. saucer eyes of yours.
Just go on.
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450. Look over there, Steve.
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451. Look at her.
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452. Go on, Steve French,
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453. go get her.
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454. Show her how you jump
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455. and show her
that big package of yours.
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456. Good kitty.
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457. You did the right thing, buddy.
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458. I know. Thanks, boys.
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459. Are you guys crying?
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460. No, we're not fucking crying
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