1. Welcome
to the Windsor Mall—Copy !req
2. London's newest and
largest shopping center.Copy !req
3. This store is
everything everyone saidCopy !req
4. it was going to be, and more!Copy !req
5. I could stay in here forever!Copy !req
6. What's happening?Copy !req
7. This new mall
is, like, the biggestCopy !req
8. thing that's happened to
me since acrylic nails.Copy !req
9. I can't wait until
it's finished.Copy !req
10. Me neither.Copy !req
11. Just looking at it
gives me goosebumps.Copy !req
12. Hey!Copy !req
13. Can't you guys build any faster?Copy !req
14. Take it easy, Alex.Copy !req
15. Malls aren't built in a day.Copy !req
16. Well, until
the new one's done,Copy !req
17. it looks like we're stuck with
our old, tried-and-true luxuryCopy !req
18. mall.Copy !req
19. OK.Copy !req
20. One guess— who am I?Copy !req
21. (TOGETHER) Mandy.Copy !req
22. Yes?Copy !req
23. Who wants me now?Copy !req
24. I'm so popular, I can't
even seek refuge at the mallCopy !req
25. anymore.Copy !req
26. Ah!Copy !req
27. Trying to be me?Copy !req
28. As if!Copy !req
29. It would take you months with
a professional makeup artistCopy !req
30. to achieve my look
of perfection.Copy !req
31. I was totally just
playing around, Mandy.Copy !req
32. Yeah.Copy !req
33. Lighten up a little,
beauty queen.Copy !req
34. Let's blow this makeup stand.Copy !req
35. No one gets away with
calling me "beauty queen"Copy !req
36. and not really meaning it.Copy !req
37. This should bring down
that pathetic wanna-be.Copy !req
38. Hey, you— stop!Copy !req
39. Thief!Copy !req
40. Get back here!Copy !req
41. Huh?Copy !req
42. Third floor—
gadgets, video, and infoCopy !req
43. on your next assignment.Copy !req
44. This better be urgent, Jerr.Copy !req
45. You interrupted a very
important shopping spree.Copy !req
46. Actually, this mission
hits very close to home.Copy !req
47. It seems something or
someone is kidnappingCopy !req
48. shoppers at exclusive
stores called All The Rage—Copy !req
49. destroying the stores
in the process.Copy !req
50. Destroying stores,
and abductingCopy !req
51. people while they shop?Copy !req
52. How evil and horrible!Copy !req
53. I know.Copy !req
54. I know.Copy !req
55. I'm here for you.Copy !req
56. Who could be behind this?Copy !req
57. That's where you come in.Copy !req
58. You'll be going undercover.Copy !req
59. As three gorgeous shoppers?Copy !req
60. Actually, as three
TV fashion reporters.Copy !req
61. Ahem!Copy !req
62. Of course, as three
gorgeous TV fashion reporters.Copy !req
63. You'll be going to
Cairo, where we'reCopy !req
64. fairly certain this group's
next action will be.Copy !req
65. It's your job to find
out where they are, and—Copy !req
66. Yeah, yeah.Copy !req
67. We know.Copy !req
68. Come on girls, we
have to save a store!Copy !req
69. - Hang on.
- Huh?Copy !req
70. Don't forget your gadgets.Copy !req
71. Oh, yeah!Copy !req
72. My favorite part
of our missions!Copy !req
73. Ultra energy laser lip-balm.Copy !req
74. Jet pack backpacks.Copy !req
75. Hair clip monster grips.Copy !req
76. Fume emitting cameras.Copy !req
77. Voice alterer.Copy !req
78. Compact parasols which
double as laser swords.Copy !req
79. And of course, some CASH.Copy !req
80. Hello— it's the 21st century!Copy !req
81. We all have credit cards.Copy !req
82. The C-A-S-H, Alex,
is a ChangeableCopy !req
83. Application Spy Halter top.Copy !req
84. It can be a parachute, a
net, a floatation device.Copy !req
85. Cool!Copy !req
86. Uh, yes.Copy !req
87. I may be coolest to you girls.Copy !req
88. Well, cheerio!Copy !req
89. Good luck in Cairo.Copy !req
90. We're here, live, in
ancient-but-fashionable Egypt.Copy !req
91. Hey!Copy !req
92. Point the camera
at me, Spielberg!Copy !req
93. Oopsie!Copy !req
94. See anything strange?Copy !req
95. Not yet.Copy !req
96. I'm gonna go look around.Copy !req
97. Sam?Copy !req
98. Sam!Copy !req
99. Look!Copy !req
100. There's some sort of
laser perimeter on those—Copy !req
101. Gates.Copy !req
102. We have to save Sam.Copy !req
103. There's a skylight— let's go!Copy !req
104. Hey!Copy !req
105. Use the parasol!Copy !req
106. Good idea.Copy !req
107. Cables.Copy !req
108. Do you think—Copy !req
109. It's like a huge elevator.Copy !req
110. Let's go!Copy !req
111. Oh, great.Copy !req
112. I hope Jerr got the extended
warranty on this thing.Copy !req
113. What's that sound?Copy !req
114. Ew!
Yuck!Copy !req
115. Ew!
- Rats!Copy !req
116. Ew!Copy !req
117. Creepy, beady little eyes!Copy !req
118. Ew!Copy !req
119. I am sick of
watching this tape.Copy !req
120. We've got to figure out
how to get Sam back.Copy !req
121. Whoa!Copy !req
122. Who's that freak?Copy !req
123. Major freak.Copy !req
124. Why is he so zoned, while
everyone with half a brainCopy !req
125. is in a major panic?Copy !req
126. Let's see what Jerry
thinks of this weirdo.Copy !req
127. Hello, ladies.Copy !req
128. Sorry about Sam.Copy !req
129. I just sent you some
pictures from the store.Copy !req
130. There's a calm, freaky guy
in the middle of the crowd.Copy !req
131. Yes.Copy !req
132. I see him.Copy !req
133. Suspiciously calm, eh?Copy !req
134. Oh, by the way—Copy !req
135. Clover, the Beverly
Hills Mall securityCopy !req
136. office need to see you, ASAP.Copy !req
137. Some trouble involving
shoplifted perfume?Copy !req
138. I didn't do it!Copy !req
139. I'm just the messenger.Copy !req
140. Ah, yes.Copy !req
141. Here's the scoop.Copy !req
142. The calm man on the
tape is Simon Tucker.Copy !req
143. He's a former owner of a popular
mom-and-pop store in IrelandCopy !req
144. that was bought out by
Harrow's— the high-endCopy !req
145. store that recently
opened a Mall near Dublin.Copy !req
146. Simon Tucker fought to save
his store, but couldn't.Copy !req
147. But why would he
be kidnapping people?Copy !req
148. Sounds like we're going
to Ireland to find out.Copy !req
149. You are spot-on
correct, my dear.Copy !req
150. Ta-ta!Copy !req
151. Hi.Copy !req
152. I'm calling about—Copy !req
153. Hey!Copy !req
154. You're the shoplifter!Copy !req
155. I am so not the shoplifter!Copy !req
156. I'm totally innocent.Copy !req
157. That's her— that Clover girl.Copy !req
158. What is she doing there?Copy !req
159. She's a liar!Copy !req
160. You better turn yourself
in, miss fugitive!Copy !req
161. Why is that little
witch, Mandy, there?Copy !req
162. Who knows?Copy !req
163. I'd like to squash her
overly-perfumed head!Copy !req
164. Hmm?Copy !req
165. (LOUDLY) I wonder
whatever happenedCopy !req
166. to that nasty little mom-and-pop
store that used to be here?Copy !req
167. Yes.Copy !req
168. Simon Tucker did formerly
have a shop on this site.Copy !req
169. We bought him out
and built over him.Copy !req
170. That's business.Copy !req
171. He mustn't have been
too happy about that.Copy !req
172. He was paid handsomely.Copy !req
173. Now, please leave the store.Copy !req
174. We only cater to a select,
upscale clientele—Copy !req
175. and, uh, you're not it.Copy !req
176. You really must leave,
or I'll call security.Copy !req
177. OK.Copy !req
178. I'm having enough trouble
with mall security.Copy !req
179. Girlfriend, let's go.Copy !req
180. We've been kicked out
of better stores than this.Copy !req
181. If this store is built over
Simon Tucker's old shop, then—Copy !req
182. Maybe we should
drop by later to doCopy !req
183. a little after-hours spying.Copy !req
184. Exactly.Copy !req
185. There isn't squat about Simon
Tucker in any of these files.Copy !req
186. Tell me about it.Copy !req
187. This was just a big waste
of time in a gross room.Copy !req
188. Whoa!
OK.Copy !req
189. This room is grosser.Copy !req
190. Hello!Copy !req
191. These are all Simon
Tucker's old files!Copy !req
192. This must be part
of his old store.Copy !req
193. Listen to this.Copy !req
194. "If they try to steal
my store from me,Copy !req
195. they're going to pay dearly.Copy !req
196. These capitalist pigs
will feel the wrathCopy !req
197. of Anti-Consumer Team."Copy !req
198. More rats!Copy !req
199. I know how to get rid of 'em.Copy !req
200. What the—?Copy !req
201. Rats!Copy !req
202. What do we do now?Copy !req
203. Just run!Copy !req
204. Looks like this is the
end of the passageway!Copy !req
205. Then let's make
a new passageway!Copy !req
206. Huh?Copy !req
207. I mean, how weird is that?Copy !req
208. A bunch of anti-mall freaks,
chasing us with wooden clubs!Copy !req
209. Freaky, indeed.Copy !req
210. It appears the club
is made from a veryCopy !req
211. rare Sydney Red
Gumtree, which onlyCopy !req
212. grows in Sydney, Australia.Copy !req
213. So the wackos get their
wood from Australia.Copy !req
214. OK.Copy !req
215. Is Simon Tucker from
Australia, or something?Copy !req
216. A fair assumption,
but we're not definite.Copy !req
217. What we do know is
that his former storeCopy !req
218. was an Australian import shop.Copy !req
219. No wonder his
store went under.Copy !req
220. Speaking of "under,"
you two will be leavingCopy !req
221. for "down under" in one hour.
Good day, ladies.Copy !req
222. OK.Copy !req
223. Time to find Simon Tucker.Copy !req
224. It should be cake.Copy !req
225. Luckily, Australia's
a tiny little place.Copy !req
226. Oh, wait— do
you hear something?Copy !req
227. Peace, love, and
groovy times, baby.Copy !req
228. What is this place?Copy !req
229. And what's
with those patches?Copy !req
230. Are those
people doing Tai Chi?Copy !req
231. Attack!Copy !req
232. Destroy the mall!Copy !req
233. (CHANTING) Down with malls!Copy !req
234. Stop all shoppers!Copy !req
235. Demolish the walls!Copy !req
236. Whoa— these people
are serious wackos.Copy !req
237. Look over there!Copy !req
238. Down with consumers!Copy !req
239. A whole training camp to
learn how to destroy stores!Copy !req
240. These people are like
my worst nightmare!Copy !req
241. What the—?Copy !req
242. So this is where
all the stores end up?Copy !req
243. They shoot through the
tunnel, like the one in Cairo!Copy !req
244. That means Sam must be
around here, somewhere.Copy !req
245. I think I've I've
perfected a more potent patch.Copy !req
246. Come to the lab.Copy !req
247. Putting the patches
on the templeCopy !req
248. stimulates more of the
nerve endings, faster.Copy !req
249. Now the mind-think serum travels
directly to the brain's core.Copy !req
250. Our revolutionary
anti-shopping armyCopy !req
251. will be even more powerful.Copy !req
252. I think Simon will be happy.Copy !req
253. You call yourselves
anti-shopping revolutionaries?Copy !req
254. I think not!Copy !req
255. (TOGETHER): Sam?Copy !req
256. As we carry out the
revolution, remember our goal—Copy !req
257. to destroy all shopping!Copy !req
258. Right?Copy !req
259. Right!Copy !req
260. I can't hear you!Copy !req
261. Right!Copy !req
262. Shopping is evil, sir!Copy !req
263. Man, Sam is
totally brainwashed!Copy !req
264. It must be that
patch on her head.Copy !req
265. Whatever it is, we have to
get her out of here— like, now.Copy !req
266. OK. we swoop down, and net Sam.Copy !req
267. Ready?Copy !req
268. Huh?Copy !req
269. Hey!Copy !req
270. What is that?Copy !req
271. Let me down!Copy !req
272. You won't get away with this!Copy !req
273. Retreat!Copy !req
274. Ow!
- Ow!Copy !req
275. Hey!Copy !req
276. Attention, anti-shoppers.Copy !req
277. We have caught the infiltrators.Copy !req
278. They're in prison one.Copy !req
279. I couldn't have designed
a better prison, myself.Copy !req
280. Yeah.Copy !req
281. I hope there's a sale going on.Copy !req
282. Simon Tucker!Copy !req
283. That's me.Copy !req
284. Welcome to your final
minutes as misguided,Copy !req
285. materialistic consumers.Copy !req
286. After my technicians apply
these to your fragile temples,Copy !req
287. I'll be proud to
have you in my army.Copy !req
288. We are not joining
any army of yours!Copy !req
289. You're from Beverly
Hills, aren't you?Copy !req
290. Yes, and proud of it.Copy !req
291. And you love shopping.Copy !req
292. Then you'll love this!Copy !req
293. Sweet!Copy !req
294. These are fabulous—
and expensive!Copy !req
295. Oh— they totally
match that short,Copy !req
296. blue skirt you just bought!Copy !req
297. Beverly Hills is a scourge.Copy !req
298. The ultimate paradise
for evil shoppers.Copy !req
299. It's the most heinous example
of consumerism on Earth.Copy !req
300. (CHANTING)
Down with consumers.Copy !req
301. Down with malls.Copy !req
302. Stop all shoppers.Copy !req
303. Demolish the walls.Copy !req
304. AllCopy !req
305. I don't know what Beverly
Hills you're talking about.Copy !req
306. And you are not going to
get away with your evil plan!Copy !req
307. By the way, what
is your evil plan?Copy !req
308. Well, since you'll soon
be helping to carry it out,Copy !req
309. I guess I can tell you.Copy !req
310. I plan on ridding the
world of all materialismCopy !req
311. and consumerism— the very
things that ruined my life.Copy !req
312. I, and ACT— my
Anti-Consumerism Teams—Copy !req
313. will destroy malls
around the world,Copy !req
314. starting with the new mall
in your Beverly Hills.Copy !req
315. What?Copy !req
316. No way, you creep!Copy !req
317. You can't!Copy !req
318. That's our new mall!Copy !req
319. Nothing is going to stand
between us and that mall!Copy !req
320. You're going down, mister!Copy !req
321. The jets are
ready to leave, sir.Copy !req
322. The Armies of ACT are mobilized.Copy !req
323. Sam, Sam, how can you do this?Copy !req
324. It's Beverly Hills—
our Beverly Hills!Copy !req
325. Down with consumers!Copy !req
326. Down with malls!Copy !req
327. (CHANTING)
Stop all shoppers!Copy !req
328. Demolish the walls!Copy !req
329. Too bad you won't be in the
army to destroy your own mall.Copy !req
330. But there are many others.Copy !req
331. Well, time to go to
the grand opening—Copy !req
332. I mean, grand closing.Copy !req
333. Hey!Copy !req
334. These scarves are from Paris!Copy !req
335. Hah!Copy !req
336. Come on!Copy !req
337. That was not the kind of
shopping spree I had in mind.Copy !req
338. We have to get to the new
Beverly Hills Mall right away.Copy !req
339. The future of shopping
depends on us!Copy !req
340. (CHANTING)
Down with consumers!Copy !req
341. Down with malls!Copy !req
342. Demolish the walls!Copy !req
343. Destroy all shoppers!Copy !req
344. Demolish the walls!Copy !req
345. Down the consumers!Copy !req
346. Quick— use the
voice-altering bullhorn thingy.Copy !req
347. This
is Simon Tucker.Copy !req
348. My faithful ACT army— come
destroy the third floor!Copy !req
349. Troops!Copy !req
350. (CHANTING)
Down with consumers!Copy !req
351. Down with malls!Copy !req
352. Stop all shoppers!Copy !req
353. Sam, snap out of it!Copy !req
354. Remember us?Copy !req
355. We're your friends,
Clover and Alex!Copy !req
356. Shopping is evil!Copy !req
357. We have to get those
stupid patches off her head.Copy !req
358. Huh?Copy !req
359. Oh, my!Copy !req
360. Put on your halter.Copy !req
361. We can grab Sam
and parachute down.Copy !req
362. Over there!Copy !req
363. Land in the fountain!Copy !req
364. Ew!Copy !req
365. That water looks nasty!Copy !req
366. Wouldn't you like to take a
nice, refreshing bath, Sammie?Copy !req
367. Stay away!Copy !req
368. Ow!Copy !req
369. Sorry!Copy !req
370. Man!Copy !req
371. That was weird.Copy !req
372. Was I, like, brainwashed,
or something?Copy !req
373. You totally were.Copy !req
374. But no time to chat.Copy !req
375. Wait— I remember.Copy !req
376. We have to save this mall!Copy !req
377. Simon plans to blow it up!Copy !req
378. Duh!Copy !req
379. What do you think
we've been doing?Copy !req
380. There he is!Copy !req
381. We have to get the patches off
the ACT army and stop Simon.Copy !req
382. Well, water
should do the trick.Copy !req
383. That's how yours came off.Copy !req
384. Good point!Copy !req
385. I have a plan.Copy !req
386. Come on!Copy !req
387. Troops, it's almost time
to commence the grand plan!Copy !req
388. Come in closer, and listen well!Copy !req
389. OK!Copy !req
390. Peel your patches off!Copy !req
391. That's an order!Copy !req
392. Simon is an evil man.Copy !req
393. He has no right to hurt innocent
people and destroy malls.Copy !req
394. Now let's stop him!Copy !req
395. Yeah!Copy !req
396. You won't win!Copy !req
397. You'll never win!Copy !req
398. Fight my new army!Copy !req
399. Are you close to him?Copy !req
400. Yeah.Copy !req
401. Hm?Copy !req
402. Huh?Copy !req
403. This can't be happening!Copy !req
404. My plan was foolproof!Copy !req
405. Congrats, girls.Copy !req
406. You've made the world safe
again for obsessive shoppers.Copy !req
407. I swear, I didn't steal it.Copy !req
408. It was found in your bag.Copy !req
409. That's the point.Copy !req
410. And you have to deal
with the consequences—Copy !req
411. and they're not pretty.Copy !req
412. You have
to believe me.Copy !req
413. Please!Copy !req
414. I am not the kind of
person who would steal!Copy !req
415. Case closed.Copy !req
416. It was in your bag.Copy !req
417. You are not going to lie
your way out of this one.Copy !req
418. No one gets awayCopy !req
419. with calling me "beauty queen"
and not really meaning it.Copy !req
420. This should bring down
that pathetic wanna-be.Copy !req
421. You!Copy !req
422. I knew you were in on this!Copy !req
423. Nice try, lady.Copy !req
424. I hereby assign you to two weeks
on the store's cleaning crew.Copy !req
425. Cleaning crew?Copy !req
426. I've never cleaned
anything in my entire life!Copy !req
427. Can't I just hire someone
to do the cleaning for me?Copy !req
428. While you're
cleaning the mall,Copy !req
429. why don't you take
this opportunityCopy !req
430. to clean up your act!Copy !req
431. So how did that TV
turn on by itself?Copy !req
432. And then show the
exact tape you needed?Copy !req
433. No need to thank me, girls.Copy !req
434. It was my pleasure.Copy !req
435. Jerr, you rule!Copy !req