1. LAST TIME ON "TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND",
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2. SO CHEF TOOK OVER AS HOST, AND, MAN,
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3. WAS HE BRUTAL TO THE CAMPERS.
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4. TO FEND FOR THEMSELVES, BUT HE LEFT THEM ALONE
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5. WITH SCARY DUDE SASQUATCHANAKWA.
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6. THEY RAN HELTER. THEY RAN SKELTER.
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7. THEY RAN INTO A CROWDED BAT CAVE.
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8. MASSIVE MISTAKE, I MIGHT ADD.
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9. ULTIMATELY, THE GIRLS ADMITTED DEFEAT.
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10. SO THE GUYS SHARED THEIR LOOT,
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11. AND WALKED OFF WITH EVERYTHING,
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12. INCLUDING THEIR DIGNITY, PROVING ONCE AGAIN
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13. THAT HOT CHICKS TRUMP GULLIBLE GUYS EVERY TIME.
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14. IN THE END, IT WAS BAD BOY DUNCAN
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15. WHO TOOK THE WALK OF SHAME,
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16. HEADING INTO OUR MOST EXCITING CHALLENGE YET.
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17. DON'T BELIEVE ME?
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18. OF "TOTAL... DRAMA... ISLAND"!
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19. CHRIS: CAMPERS!
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20. WELCOME TO THE SEMIFINALS.
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21. TODAY, WE REWARD OUR CHALLENGERS
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22. WITH AN ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT PANCAKE BREAKFAST.
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23. THAT'S RIGHT, GENUINE FOOD BYPRODUCTS
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24. RELATIVELY CLOSE TO THEIR EXPIRATION DATES.
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25. SO I ACTUALLY MADE IT TO THE FINAL THREE.
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26. JUST GOES TO SHOW YOU HOW FAR A BAD ATTITUDE CAN GET YOU.
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27. WHATEVER.
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28. I KNEW I'D MAKE IT TO THE END.
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29. BIG SHOCKER.
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30. I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE WEIRD GOTH GIRL MADE IT.
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31. I WANTED TO BELIEVE IT.
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32. I DREAMT IT COULD BE TRUE.
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33. AND NOW THE DAY IS FINALLY HERE.
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34. ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT PANCAKES!
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35. YES!
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36. DON'T BE SHY, DUDE.
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37. "ALL YOU CAN EAT."
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38. YOU GOT THE PANCAKES, I GOT THE STOMACH.
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39. TEE 'EM UP!
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40. OH, YEAH!
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41. NOW YOU'RE TALKING, BABY!
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42. YEAH, THE MONEY WOULD BE AWESOME,
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43. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE SWEETER?
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44. MAKING SURE HEATHER LOSES.
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45. LUCKILY, I'M UP AGAINST THE FREAK SHOW
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46. AND FATTY GINORMOUS, SO THEY MAY AS WELL
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47. JUST GIVE ME THE CHECK.
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48. I MEAN, COME ON.
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49. I THINK WE ALL KNOW WHO'S GONNA WIN.
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50. PANCAKES, PANCAKES, PANCAKES!
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51. IF I WIN, I'M GONNA BUY CAMP WAWANAKWA
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52. SO I CAN BURN IT DOWN AND TURN IT INTO A GRAVEYARD.
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53. PANCAKES, PANCAKES, PANCAKES!
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54. WHEN I WIN, I'M THINKING OF MY OWN SPIN-OFF SERIES—
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55. "THE WORLD ACCORDING TO HEATHER."
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56. I'D NEVER WIN.
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57. BUT IF I DID, I'D START EVERY DAY WITH PANCAKES.
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58. 'CAUSE THEY'RE LIKE LITTLE MINI SUNSHINES
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59. FILLED WITH YUMMY FUN.
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60. PERSONALLY, I'VE HAD ENOUGH DRAMA HERE TO LAST A LIFETIME.
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61. I MEAN, OWEN'S OKAY, BUT EIGHT WEEKS OF HEATHER
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62. WAS ABOUT AS MUCH FUN AS A MOUTHFUL OF IMPACTED MOLARS.
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63. SURE, EIGHT WEEKS WITH THESE LOSERS IS CAUSE FOR INSANITY,
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64. SO THEY CAN RETRIEVE HER.
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65. AS THE HAZARDOUS WASTE THAT HE IS.
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66. IN THE WORLD WOULDN'T BE SPECIAL WITHOUT FRIENDS TO SHARE THEM.
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67. SURE, OWEN'S DUMB LUCK HAS WON HIM A FEW CHALLENGES,
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68. BUT IT'S HIS ABILITY NOT TO BE DISGUSTED
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69. BY ANYTHING EDIBLE THAT WORRIES ME.
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70. LOOKS LIKE A PANCAKE?
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71. AND LAZY.
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72. UGH, SLOTHS COULD TAKE A CUE FROM "SLOW-EN."
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73. I SHOULD PROBABLY SPIT THIS OUT.
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74. THANKFULLY, GWEN HAS NO STRENGTHS.
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75. SHE'S JUST A LOW-RENT GUTTER PUNK
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76. WITH DRAGON BREATH AND UGLY HAIR.
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77. HEATHER'S STRENGTH IS OBVIOUSLY HER BOTTOMLESS PIT OF MEAN.
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78. I'M BANKING ON HER MASSIVE EGO TO BE HER DOWNFALL.
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79. CAMPERS, WELCOME TO THE SEMIFINALS.
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80. THE PRODUCERS RAN OUT OF INSANE WAYS OF TORTURING YOU,
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81. SO...
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82. THEY ASKED THE OUSTED CAMPERS FOR IDEAS.
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83. TURNS OUT THEY HAD A LOT.
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84. THEY PROVIDED US WITH THE SICKEST, MOST TWISTED,
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85. AND INSANE DARES IMAGINABLE IN "TDI'S" VERSION OF...
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86. SPIN THE BOTTLE!
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87. STARTING WITH IZZY, TRENT,
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88. CODY, JUSTIN,
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89. NOAH, LESHAWNA, LINDSAY,
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90. BETH, TYLER,
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91. HAROLD, D.J. GEOFF, BRIDGETTE,
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92. DUNCAN, COURTNEY, EVA,
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93. KATIE AND SADIE,
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94. AND THE HOMESCHOOLED, MISOGYNISTIC COUNTRY BOY,
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95. EZEKIEL.
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96. PUT THEM ALL TOGETHER, AND WE'VE GOT A HIGH-STAKES GAME
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97. OF "I TRIPLE DOG DARE YOU"!
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98. WHAT IS THIS, GRADE 5?
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99. WHY DON'T WE JUST DO SEVEN MINUTES OF HEAVEN
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100. IN A SKANKY BASEMENT CLOSET?
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101. YEAH! GOOD CALL!
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102. LET'S DO IT!
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103. OW!
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104. EACH PLAYER WILL TAKE TURNS SPINNING THE BOTTLE.
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105. THE DARE YOU'LL PERFORM.
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106. IN HOPES OF BOOTING THEM OUT.
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107. AND IF WE REFUSE TO DO THE DARE?
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108. OH, NOT A GOOD OPTION.
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109. WILL BE SENT DIRECTLY TO THE DOCK OF SHAME,
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110. BOARD THE BOAT OF LOSERS,
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111. DO NOT GO TO BONFIRE, DO NOT COLLECT MARSHMALLOW,
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112. AND DO NOT GET TO WIN $100,000.
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113. WOW, A SUDDEN-DEATH ELIMINATION.
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114. GOOD ONE.
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115. OKAY, WHO'S READY TO HUMILIATE THEMSELVES FIRST?
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116. OH, WHAT THE HECK. LET'S GET THIS OVER WITH.
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117. OKAY, SO HERE'S THE DEAL.
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118. CHEF AND I HAVE A LITTLE SIDE BET GOING.
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119. WHOEVER PUKES FIRST HAS TO PONY UP 100 BUCKS.
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120. OKAY, LET'S GET THIS PARTY STARTED!
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121. DUNCAN'S DARE.
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122. LICK OWEN'S ARMPIT.
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123. GWEN, YOU CAN PERFORM THE DARE YOURSELF
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124. OR DARE ONE OF YOUR COMPETITORS TO DO IT.
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125. EITHER WAY,
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126. SOMEONE'S LICKING SOME ARMPIT IN THE NEXT MINUTE.
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127. I TRIPLE DOG DARE HEATHER.
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128. YOU COULD IMAGINE THAT YOU'RE LICKING AN ICE-CREAM CONE.
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129. SHUT UP, OWEN!
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130. MINUS THE B.O.
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131. I'M WARNING YOU!
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132. OH, AND THE PIT HAIR.
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133. OH HO HO, MAN!
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134. THAT WAS SO SICK.
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135. I NEARLY PUKED.
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136. NEARLY.
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137. EZEKIEL'S DARE IS...
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138. CHEW YOUR OWN TOENAIL SLOWLY.
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139. GWEN! I DARE GWEN.
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140. DON'T CHOKE ON IT, HONEY.
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141. AH AH AH AH.
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142. HE SAID CHEW IT SLOWLY.
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143. THERE. SATISFIED?
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144. VERY.
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145. I'M JUST PICTURING TRENT WATCHING THIS,
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146. AND SOMETHING TELLS ME HE WON'T BE EAGER
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147. TO LOCK LIPS WITH YOU ANYTIME SOON.
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148. YOU SHOULD TALK, PIT BREATH.
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149. BETH.
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150. RECHEWING A WAD OF HAROLD'S GUM.
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151. I WILL TAKE THE DARE!
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152. EW!
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153. DUDE, IT'S CHEWED GUM.
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154. HAROLD'S CHEWED GUM.
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155. I KNOW, BUT IT MUST BE PRETTY SPECIAL IF HE'S BEEN SAVING IT.
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156. MMM.
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157. FULL BODY.
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158. A DELICATE, FRUITY AROMA WITH A HINT OF CITRUS.
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159. ROBUST, YET BALANCED.
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160. OH, SUMMERY.
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161. OOOH!
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162. AND A CRUNCHY CENTER.
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163. WHOO-HOO!
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164. OWEN WINS THE FIRST FREEBIE.
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165. AND A TETANUS SHOT IF YOU WANT.
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166. NAH, I'M GOOD. THANKS.
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167. THIS COULD BE HARDER THAN I THOUGHT.
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168. WELCOME BACK TO "TDI'S" SEMIFINALS
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169. AND A CHALLENGE WE LIKE TO CALL "I TRIPLE DOG DARE YOU."
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170. GWEN, YOU'RE UP NEXT.
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171. DROP A TRAY OF ICE INTO YOUR UNDIES AND LET THEM MELT.
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172. THAT'S IT? I CAN HANDLE THAT.
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173. NOW THAT'S ONE COOL CHICK
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174. WITH A FROSTY 'TUDE CHILLIN' BY THE—
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175. JUST GIVE ME THE F-F-FREAKIN' F-FREEBIE.
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176. MY TURN!
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177. AND I'M TAKING THE DARE. I DON'T CARE WHAT IT IS.
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178. THERE IS NO WAY I WAS LETTING THOSE NERDLINGS GET AHEAD OF ME.
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179. I MEAN, HOW BAD COULD THE DARE BE?
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180. I'D ALREADY LICKED OWEN'S ARMPIT.
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181. SORRY.
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182. SHUT UP, OWEN!
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183. - TWICE IN A ROW'S GOTTA SUCK. -I MEAN IT!
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184. WELL, ESPECIALLY SINCE I NEVER WASH IN THERE.
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185. - UGH! -NOT 'CAUSE I DON'T WANT TO.
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186. I JUST FORGET.
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187. HEY! YOU DIDN'T PUKE THIS TIME!
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188. YOU STILL COOL?
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189. OKAY, WE'LL GIVE HEATHER A FEW MORE MINUTES ON LIFE SUPPORT
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190. BEFORE WE START THE NEXT ROUND.
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191. OKAY, CHEF MADE SNACKS.
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192. PB&J ANYONE?
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193. NICE!
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194. COME ON, IZZY! BRING IT!
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195. GIVE A PURPLE NURPLE TO A SLEEPING BEAR.
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196. YES!
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197. OH, SOUNDS WICKED, MAN!
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198. WHAT'S A PURPLE NURPLE?
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199. OH, HEY, THERE, MR. BEAR.
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200. I'M JUST GONNA GIVE YOU A LITTLE PINCH
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201. AHHH!
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202. LICK OWEN'S TOE JAM.
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203. OH, IS THAT WHAT THAT BLACK GUNK IS?
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204. I'LL USE MY FREEBIE.
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205. GOOD CALL.
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206. DRINK POWDERED FRUIT PUNCH FROM THE COMMUNAL TOILET.
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207. QUITE THE PREDICAMENT, GWEN.
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208. OR DO I SAVE IT FOR AN EVEN SICKER DARE DOWN THE ROAD?
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209. WHAT TO DO. WHAT TO DO.
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210. I'M GOING IN.
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211. SO FREAKIN' SICK.
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212. CHEF'S GOING DOWN.
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213. NO WAY. THAT'S SO GROSS.
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214. OH HO HO!
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215. AT THIS RATE,
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216. TRENT'S GONNA NEED A FUMIGATION SQUAD JUST—
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217. EAT DOG FOOD.
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218. YEAH, BABY!
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219. MAN, SORRY, GUYS.
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220. I KEEP GETTING ALL THE GOOD ONES.
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221. OKAY, DOWN, BOY! HEEL!
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222. DUDE, YOU HAVE TWO FREEBIES YOU CAN USE.
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223. BETTER YET, YOU COULD DARE AN OPPONENT—
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224. LIKE, SAY, ONE WITHOUT A FREEBIE?
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225. YOU STILL HAVE A BIT OF JELLY ON YOUR LOWER LIP.
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226. OH, GO STICK YOUR FACE BACK IN THE TOILET.
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227. IT'S COOL, BRO. MY DOG DIGS THIS FOOD.
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228. TIME TO FIND OUT WHAT I'VE BEEN MISSING.
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229. MEATY-TASTING.
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230. OKAY, THAT WAS SO GROSS!
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231. IS THERE NOTHING THESE FREAKS WON'T DO?
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232. I CAN'T BELIEVE NO ONE'S DROPPED OUT
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233. AND OWEN'S GOT 20 FREEBIES.
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234. YEAH, BABY!
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235. GWEN AND HEATHER HAVE SQUAT, BUT NOT TO WORRY.
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236. THERE'S STILL PLENTY TO BE MOTIVATED ABOUT.
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237. IF YOU HELP ME TAKE DOWN HEATHER,
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238. I'LL SHARE MY WINNINGS WITH YOU.
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239. WHAT IF YOU DON'T WIN?
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240. I'LL SWING FOR A BOX OF DOUGHNUTS.
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241. THE LADY DRIVES A HARD BARGAIN.
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242. DEAL!
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243. CHRIS, I'D LIKE TO GIVE AWAY HALF MY FREEBIES.
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244. UH, WELL, OKAY.
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245. ARE YOU SURE?
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246. HELLO? IX-NAY ON THE ONSPIRACY-CAY!
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247. THAT IS TOTALLY UNFAIR.
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248. GET OUT YOUR RULE BOOK AND DO YOUR RULE-CHECKING THING.
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249. THEY'RE OBVIOUSLY GONNA GANG UP AND WHOOP ME WITH DARES.
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250. THERE HAS TO BE A RULE ABOUT THIS KIND OF THING!
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251. SORRY, THEM'S THE RULES. NOT A RULE TO BE HAD.
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252. - NADA.
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253. DRINK A BLENDED PUREE OF CHEF'S MYSTERY MEAT.
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254. EENY, MEENY, MINEY...
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255. HEATHER.
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256. FINALLY, I CATCH A BREAK.
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257. THERE IS NO WAY LINDSAY COULD THINK OF ANYTHING BAD.
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258. OOH, YOU'RE NOT GONNA LIKE THIS ONE.
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259. HAVE YOUR HEAD SHAVED BY CHEF.
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260. WHAT?
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261. LINDSAY RULES!
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262. WHAT'S IT GOING TO BE, HEATHER?
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263. ARE YOU GOING TO DO THE DARE?
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264. OR THE WALK OF SHAME?
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265. NOOOO!
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266. HUH? WHA— AGH!
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267. WOW. WELL, THAT WAS AN UNFORTUNATE ACCIDENT.
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268. LOOKS LIKE HEATHER'S OUT.
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269. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? HE SHAVED MY HEAD!
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270. TRUE, BUT YOU DIDN'T ACTUALLY ACCEPT THE DARE.
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271. IF YOU HAD, YOU'D STILL BE BALD,
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272. BUT AT LEAST YOU'D BE IN THE GAME.
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273. THAT WAS HARSH.
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274. TOUGH BREAK.
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275. AGGHHH!
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276. SORRY, THEM'S THE RULES.
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277. I THOUGHT YOU SAID THERE WEREN'T ANY RULES!
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278. YEAH, I KNOW.
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279. IT'S COMPLICATED.
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280. BUT HERE'S THE RUB— YOU LOSE, THEY WIN.
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281. NO WAY!
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282. WE WON!
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283. YES!
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284. FINE! BUT YOU'LL BE HEARING FROM MY LAWYERS!
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285. YEAH, YEAH, I KNOW.
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286. IT'S GONNA BE A LONG RIDE.
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287. WHEN I SUE YOU FOR EVERYTHING YOU'VE GOT!
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288. AND THEN THERE WERE TWO.
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289. TUNE IN TO SEE WHO WILL WIN THE CHECK FOR $100,000
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290. ON "TOTAL... DRAMA... ISLAND"!
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291. YOU WANT DRAMA?
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292. YOU'LL BE PENNILESS! JOBLESS!
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