Tosh.0 1x9

Directed by

Erik Hoffstad as Salvia Eric

This weeks celebrity video is Tommy Chong. This weeks web redemption is Drunk Dunk.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. STAND DOWN TURKEYS.

2. STAND DOWN.

3. WELCOME TO TOSH.0.

4. TODAY WE HAVE TOMMY CHONG IN

5. THE WEED VERSE SALVIA RACE.

6. THE DIZZY DUNK GUY GETS A WEB

7. RAW SEM SHUN, AND I LAY DOWN THE

8. ULTIMATE POPCORN CHALLENGE.

9. ALL RIGHT TURKEYS.

10. AFTER THIS SPEECH THE TURKEYS

11. IMMEDIATELY INVADED POLAND.

12. THEY WERE TRYING TO CREATE A

13. MASTER TURKEY RACE.

14. A TURKEY WITH ALL WHITE MEAT.

15. THAT SOUNDS DELICIOUS.

16. I'VE ACTUALLY PLAYED THERE.

17. IT'S A NICE VENUE.

18. HOW YOU TURKEYS DOING TONIGHT.

19. AM I RIGHT?

20. HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WITH A

21. LOT OF DARK MEAT WALK LIKE THIS,

22. AND TURKEYS WITH WHITE MEAT WALK

23. LIKE THIS.

24. YOU GUYS ARE GOBBING THIS UP.

25. LAST WEEK I SAW A TURKEY IN A

26. SUPERMARKET SO FAR PAST ITS EX

27. OPERATION DATE ASHTIN KUTCHER

28. MARRIED HER.

29. I ALWAYS HAVE TO WEAR BLUE.

30. I SHOULD HAVE DONE THIS BEFORE

31. THE SHOW.

32. CAN SOMEBODY TO CHECK IF MY GIMP

33. IS DOING MY LAUNDRY?

34. GOOD.

35. HE'S NOT MUCH OF A TALKER.

36. TAKE A LOOK.

37. I'M WRINKLE FREE.

38. BY THE WAY OUR SAFE BOARD IS

39. FEBREE

40. FEBREEZE.

41. YOU KNOW WHAT THE WORST PART

42. ABOUT HAVING A ROOMMATE IS.

43. THEY USE ALL YOUR PEANUT BUTTER.

44. JUDGE GROSS.

45. IT LOOKS LIKE MR. PEANUT

46. NUTTED ON HIS FACE.

47. I LIKE IT WITH CELERY.

48. MAYBE HE HAD A LOT OF GUM IN

49. HIS HAIR.

50. WHAT'S NEXT.

51. GOAL!

52. GOAL!

53. GOAL!

54. GOAL!

55. GOAL, GOAL, GOAL, GOAL!

56. GOAL!

57. GOAL!

58. GOAL!

59. I'M SORRY.

60. YOU WANT TO FEEL BAD FOR A GUY

61. IN A WIFE BEATER CAPRI PANTS

62. THAT WAS WHIPPING A HORSE.

63. TONIGHT YOU'RE ALL IN FOR A REAL

64. TREAT.

65. IT'S TIME TO PLAY IS IT GAY?

66. IS IT GAY?

67. NO.

68. HE IS A HERO.

69. AND THIS IS WHAT HE HAS TO DO TO

70. KEEP US SAFE.

71. NEXT.

72. IS IT GAY?

73. NO.

74. THIS GAME IS GETTING EASIER AND

75. EASIER.

76. WHAT IF THEY'RE BROTHERS.

77. YOU DON'T KNOW.

78. IF I HAD A NICKEL FOR EVERY

79. TIME ME AND MY BROTHER TONGUE

80. KISSED, IN THE MORNING, HE WOULD

81. COME DOWN FROM HIS BUNK BED,

82. MORNING MISSED YOU.

83. WHAT'S NEXT.

84. THAT'S JAKE GYLLANHALL

85. WEARING A WHITE STEED.

86. WEARING A VERY DEEP V.

87. NOTHING GAY ABOUT THAT.

88. IS IT GAY?

89. NO.

90. THIS IS NOT GAY.

91. IT'S MERELY ADULT FILM STARS

92. ACTING IN A MOVIE.

93. WHAT IF THIS MOVIE HAD STARRED

94. KEVIN SPACEY.

95. MORGAN FREEMAN.

96. TYLER PERRY.

97. YOU WOULDN'T THINK THEY'RE GAY.

98. THEY HAVE INCREDIBLE RANGE.

99. THEY'RE GOING TO BE GETTING

100. AWARDS.

101. THIS GAME IS STUPID.

102. I QUIT.

103. WHOA!

104. NOW, THAT WAS GAY.

105. STOP LAUGHING HE COULD HAVE

106. DISLOCATED —

107. YOU COMBINE IT WITH GUT —

108. LET'S SEE WHO LOST THE TOUR

109. DE FRANCE IN THIS WEEK'S

110. BREAKDOWN.

111. BEFORE WE PLAY IT NOTICE THE

112. CHILD SIZE HELMET AND THE

113. LAVENDAR T-SHIRT LIP BRACELET.

114. ALL RIGHT.

115. LET'S THE DOUBLE XL GAMES BEGIN.

116. REMEMBER WHAT SCIENCE TELLS AN

117. OBJECT IN MOTION TENDS TO STAY

118. IN MOTION.

119. THAT'S ESPECIALLY TRUE FOR FAT

120. OBJEC

121. OBJECTS.

122. HE HITS THE MOLEHILL AND HE IS

123. UP THERE.

124. AT THIS POINT HE'S THINKING I'M

125. NOT GOING TO LIE THIS IS GOING

126. WELL.

127. IF THERE'S ENOUGH TIME IN THE

128. AIR I MAY TRY FOR A TAIL WHIP OR

129. A SUPERMAN SEAT GRAB OR A RODEO

130. FLIP.

131. AND BACK DOWN TO EARTH.

132. TECHNICALLY HIS BACK WHEEL NEVER

133. LEFT THE GROUND.

134. THAT'S NOT A JUMP.

135. IT'S A WHEELY IN MY

136. NEIGHBORHOOD.

137. HE COMPLETELY EATS.

138. DIRT HAS ZERO CARBS.

139. HARD TO TELL EXACTLY WHAT HE

140. HEARD.

141. HE'S CLUTCHING EVERYTHING.

142. FIVE SECONDS AGO HE WAS ABOUT TO

143. KISS THE SUN.

144. NOW HE'S RDSING AROUND IN POISON

145. IVY.

146. THOSE MAN BOOTS DOUBLE HIS

147. AIR BAGS AND HIS BUDDY KEEPS THE

148. CAMERA THROUGH THE PAIN AND FOR

149. THAT WE THANK YOU.

150. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH THE

151. DIZZY DUNK GUY WEB RAW SEM SHUN.

152. HOT POCKETS.

153. SIMILAR TERMS.

154. MEXICAN WAFFLES.

155. TRUNK TACO.

156. IT'S SLIPPERY.

157. THAT'S WHAT I LIKE.

158. GO AROUND THE BACK.

159. 1, 2, 3.

160. ON THE GROUND.

161. OH MY GOD!

162. HEY.

163. BEATS WATCHING A WNBA GAME.

164. DID YOU REALLY NEED TO MAKE

165. THE DUNK HARDER?

166. WHEN YOU'RE WHITE AND ON THE

167. BASKETBALL COURT YOU'RE ALREADY

168. HANDICAPPED.

169. A LESSON FOR ALL THE KIDS AT

170. HOME.

171. PABST BLUE-RIBBON IS NOT A

172. ATHLETIC ENHANCER.

173. SUBSTANCE ABUSE HAS NO PLACE IN

174. THEATRE ICKS UNLESS YOU'RE

175. AWESOME.

176. YOU EVER WATCH A COMPETITION

177. THAT'S NOT DOMINATED BY JUNKIES.

178. ATHLETES HAVE ALWAYS BEEN MEAT

179. HEADS.

180. DON'T TAKE THE FUN OUT OF THE

181. GAME BY BEING A GOODIE 2 SHOES.

182. YOU WANT TO IMPRESS ME.

183. CHASE SOME CHEERLEADER TAIL

184. BEFORE GETTING IN THE RUNNING

185. BACK.

186. THAT'S THE WHITE RUNNING BACK.

187. DRINKING IS A WAY TO BOND

188. WITH YOUR TEAMMATES AND MINGLE

189. WITH THE FANS AND TRY TO FORGET

190. THE FACT YOU'RE A COMPLETE

191. DISAPPOINTMENT.

192. THE WORLD OF SPORTS IS A HAVEN

193. FOR DRUG TAKING MORONS.

194. I SAY FINE YOU CAN'T BE

195. EXPECTED TO THROW DOWN ONE DOWN

196. ON THE FIRST ATTEMPT.

197. GREATNESS TAKES PRACTICE.

198. WE'VE BROUGHT HIM BACK AGAIN TO

199. TRY TO DRINK AND DRIVE THE LANE

200. IN THIS WEEK'S WEB REDEMPTION.

201. HOW IS IT GOING, PAUL?

202. GOOD.

203. SO GLAD TO MEET YOU.

204. GLAD TO MEET YOU TOO.

205. TELL ME ABOUT THAT DUNK.

206. BASICALLY IT WAS US GUYS

207. CHALLENGING EACH OTHER IN A

208. CONTEST.

209. YOU DOWNED A BEER.

210. WHAT WAS YOUR EXACT MENTAL

211. STATE.

212. WE HAD BEEN DOING THE DUNK

213. CONTEST ALL DAY.

214. THIS WAS THE LAST ONE.

215. AND THIS WAS MY GRAND ATTEMPT.

216. MY GOAL IS TO CHUG THIS BEER, DO

217. A BACK FLIP, AND DO A 360 SPIN.

218. AND THE SPINNING AND THE

219. SPINNI

220. SPINNING.

221. BY THE WAY YOU ALMOST MADE

222. THE SHOT.

223. I KNOW.

224. IT ALMOST WENT IN.

225. IT WAS VERY IMPRESSIVE.

226. I DID WIN THE DUNK CONTEST.

227. WITH THAT ONE.

228. I HAD DONE ONE EARLIER WHERE

229. I DUNKED OFF THE HOOD OF A

230. MOVING CAR.

231. I HAD A GOOD LEAD.

232. I WANTED TO NAIL IT HOME WITH A

233. STRONG DUNK THAT I DIDN'T THINK

234. ANY OF MY JEWISH FRIENDS THAT

235. ARE 5'8" COULD DO.

236. I LIKE THE CAR ONE.

237. KIDS IF YOU CAN BEAT THAT PLEASE

238. SEND US YOUR TAPE.

239. HOW MANY SPINS DID YOU DO.

240. 10 SPINS.

241. I KIND OF LOST COUNT.

242. DO YOU BELIEVE IN KARMA.

243. YOU DID LITTER THAT BEER CAN,

244. AND THEN YOU FELL INTO THE TRASH

245. CAN.

246. DO YOU SEE THAT?

247. QUICK ACTING KARMA.

248. VERY QUICK ACTING.

249. WHO'S YOUR FAVORITE

250. BASKETBALL PLAYER OF ALL-TIME.

251. I WAS A BIG FAN OF DAVID

252. ROBINSON.

253. THE ADMIRAL.

254. YEAH.

255. I HATED FLAT TOPS.

256. THAT'S WHY I HATED STVE HARVEY.

257. WHO WAS YOUR FAVORITE DRUNK OF

258. ALL-TI

259. ALL-TIME.

260. NORM FROM CHEERS.

261. MINE IS MY DAD.

262. HOW HAS THIS CHANGED YOUR

263. LIFE?

264. I DON'T DO DIZZY DUNK SPINS

265. ANYMORE.

266. DO YOU THINK KOBE BRYANT RAPED

267. THAT CHICK?

268. UM?

269. IT'S IMPRESSIVE, ISN'T IT?

270. YOU CAN PRETTY MUCH —

271. LET ME MAKE SURE THIS IS

272. OKAY.

273. UH-OH.

274. THAT WAS A MISTAKE.

275. HERE WE GO.

276. THAT WAS GOOD.

277. SO YOU CAN SPIN WITHOUT FALLING.

278. YOU SEEM LIKE YOU'RE ON YOUR

279. GAME.

280. ONCE YOU GET A FEW BEERS IN YOU

281. I GUESS THAT WOULD BE MORE

282. REALISTIC.

283. YOU'VE GOT YOUR BEER, AND

284. YOUR BAT.

285. THE WORLD WANTS TO KNOW ARE YOU

286. READY TO GIVE IT ANOTHER SHOT?

287. I'M READY.

288. LET'S CHUG.

289. GOOD JOB.

290. GOOD JOB.

291. 10 ROTATIONS.

292. COME ON, KEEP THE HEAD DOWN.

293. I'LL BE HONEST I HAVEN'T BEEN

294. COUNTING.

295. OKAY.

296. GET ON THE BOARD.

297. COME ON.

298. PERFECT.

299. LET'S GO.

300. YOU GOT TO GO FOR TWO.

301. ARE YOU IN?

302. YES.

303. 8 SECONDS ON THE BALL.

304. YEAH.

305. RIDE THAT BULL.

306. ALL RIGHT.

307. PAUL COME ON, THIS WAY.

308. LET'S GO LET'S GO!

309. COME ON.

310. PAUL, WATCH OUT FOR THE PEOPLE

311. PLAYING JENGA.

312. WATCH OUT FOR MY GRANDMA'S URN.

313. GO THIS WAY.

314. AND I FORGOT TO MENTION YOU HAVE

315. TO DUNK OVER DENNIS RODMAN.

316. MY LITTLE BROTHER.

317. THANK YOU, DENNIS.

318. I APPRECIATE IT.

319. THAT'S COOL.

320. IT WAS ALL BALLS.

321. FOR $5,000 DENNIS RODMAN WILL

322. COME TO YOUR PLACE FOR ABOUT 4

323. MINUTES.

324. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH TOMMY

325. CHONG.

326. NOW IT'S TIME FOR THE PRANK

327. OF THE WEEK.

328. GET OUT.

329. WHAT?

330. I DON'T CARE.

331. I DON'T KNOW, LIKE, LIKE

332. CHILI SAUCE.

333. THAT WAS THE PRANK OF THE

334. WEEK BROUGHT TO YOU BY BURGER

335. KING.

336. HAVE IT YOUR WAY, LATE AT NIGHT.

337. THIS IS THE POPCORN CATCHER.

338. SO IMPRESSIVE.

339. MY ORIGINAL IDEA WAS TRYING TO

340. USE CADBURY CREAM EGGS.

341. BUT GOOD LUCK TRYING TO FIND

342. THOSE IN THE SUMMER.

343. YOU CAN STOCK UP IN THE SPRING.

344. IF YOU THINK YOU CAN DO BETTER

345. SEND IT TO OUR WEBSITE.

346. NOW LIVE VIA WEB CAM IS TOMMY

347. CHONG.

348. DOING FINE.

349. HOW ARE YOU?

350. FINE.

351. I DON'T WANT TO GIVE IT AWAY BUT

352. I NEED YOU TO TELL THE KIDS AT

353. HOME THEY SHOULDN'T DO DRUGS.

354. TELL THEM WHAT?

355. TELL THEM NOT TO DO DRUGS.

356. WHY?

357. IT'S A LEGAL THING.

358. LISTEN KIDS, IF YOU WANT TO

359. DO DRUGS REPLACE THEM.

360. NO.

361. WHAT TOMMY IS TRYING TO SAY IS

362. DON'T DO DRUGS.

363. ENJOY THE VIDEO.

364. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE

365. BATTLE YOU HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING

366. FOR.

367. WEED VERSUS SALVIA.

368. TODAY WE HAVE THE PRINCE OF THE

369. NEW SCHOOL, SALVIA ERIC VERSUS

370. TOMMY CHONG.

371. ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS TAKE A

372. TOKE.

373. RUN THROUGH THE TIRES.

374. THE FIRST ONE THROUGH BUYS A

375. LUNCH.

376. ON YOUR MARK, GET SET.

377. OH.

378. DUDE!

379. THIS IS A GOOD VISUAL AID WHY

380. YOU SHOULD NEVER DO DRUGS.

381. RIGHT HERE.

382. MR. HAT, I HAVE TO GO TO

383. SPACE TODAY.

384. I KNOW YOU DO.

385. THANKS, TOMMY AND ERIC, AND

386. DON'T FORGET TO GO TO OUR

387. WEBSITE,

388. COMEDYCENTRAL.COM/TOSH.0.

389. THIS WEEK'S VIDEO COMES FROM

390. JOHN ALRICH.

391. HOW YOU DOING?

392. THANKS, JOHN.

393. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE.

394. THAT'S MY BUSH.

395. WELCOME BACK.

396. LAST WEEK WE POSTED ON OUR

397. WEBSITE AN ORIGINAL PAINTING

398. THAT WAS CREATED FOR US, AND WE

399. HAD YOU INTERPRET IT.

400. HERE'S SOME OF MY COMMENTS.

401. PENSKE THINKS THAT THE PAINTING

402. IS AN IMPRESSION ANIES

403. PARTICULAR WORK.

404. TOGETHER DANIEL AND THE

405. PRESIDENT MUST TRAVEL SIDE FREE

406. OF PRECONCEPTIONS DOWN THE

407. STREAM OF IDEOLOGY.

408. DONNIE THINKS YOU AND OBAMA HAVE

409. BECOME GAY DINGOES.

410. SO YOU MUST LEAVE THE U.S., AND

411. SAIL THE MARY, MARY.

412. IT'S A VERY DIFFERENT VIEWPOINT.

413. NICK HOW MUCH I LIKE IT — UNION

414. CORN.

415. I DON'T CARE WHAT IT MEANS.

416. IT TURNS ME ON.

417. NATE, CHARLIE FOUND CANDY

418. MOUNTAIN.

419. CHARLIE FOUND CANDY MOUNTAIN.

420. CHARLIE, FOUND CANDY

421. MOUNTAIN.

422. CHARLIE FOUND CANDY MOUNTAIN.

423. IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS.

424. HEAD OVER TO YOUR COMPUTER.

425. HE DID ANOTHER PAINTING OF

426. ME.

427. THAT IS CURRENTLY AVAILABLE ON

428. eBAY.

429. 127 RIGHT NOW, WORTH NOW.

430. HERE'S OUR LAST VIDEO OF REH

431. DOG.

432. KEEP THEM COMING.

433. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR

434. WATCHING.

435. MAKE SURE YOU WATCH NEXT WEEK

436. WHEN WE GIVE THE SKATEBOARD GIRL

437. A WEB REDEMPTION.

438. YOU CAN DO IT!

439. DON'T FALL.

440. DON'T FALL.

441. YOU'RE GOING TO NEED TO BUY

442. HER SHOES.

443. AND DON'T FORGET TO GO TO OUR

444. WEBSITE.

445. COMEDYCENTRAL.COM/TOSH.0 TO

446. SUBMIT YOUR POPCORN CHALLENGES.

447. GOODNIGHT.

448. SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.

449. BEFORE WE LEAVE I HAVE TO MAKE

450. 58 CONSECUTIVE 3-POINTERS.

451. THAT'S JUST A LITTLE PART OF MY

452. OCD.

453. IT'S GOING TO BE A WHILE.

454. MY RECORD IS 3.

455. WE'RE GOING TO BE HERE ALL

456. NIGHT.

457. ONE.

458. 2.

459. YES, I CALLED GLASS.

460. GOT TO START OVER.