1. - OH!Copy !req
2. - THANK YOU.
ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
3. THAT'S A SHAME.Copy !req
4. HEY, HE MAY HAVE
SCREWED UP THE DIVE,Copy !req
5. BUT HE LOOKS FANTASTIC
IN A SPEEDO.Copy !req
6. THAT'S THE PROBLEM
WITH OUR SHOW.Copy !req
7. IF YOU SEE A SEXY ITALIAN GUY
ON A DIVING BOARD,Copy !req
8. YOU KNOW
IT'S NOT GONNA GO WELL.Copy !req
9. BUT WHAT YOU COULDN'T SEE IS
THAT HE'S A SYNCHRONIZED DIVER,Copy !req
10. AND THE GUY NEXT TO HIM
DID THE EXACT SAME THING.Copy !req
11. CAN WE SEE THE WIDE SHOT?Copy !req
12. YEAH. LOOKS LIKE CHINA
WILL BE DIVING FOR SECOND.Copy !req
13. WELCOME TO TOSH.0.
I'M YOUR HOST, LANE KIFFIN.Copy !req
14. PEOPLE ONLINE
SAY I LOOK LIKE HIM.Copy !req
15. I DON'T SEE IT.Copy !req
16. AND I CERTAINLY
WOULDN'T DISRESPECT FLORIDA.Copy !req
17. OHH.Copy !req
18. THAT'S BECAUSE I'M NOT A LOSER.Copy !req
19. IT'S GOOD TO BE BACK
ON THE AIR.Copy !req
20. WE HAD A NICE
MANDATORY VACATION.Copy !req
21. YOU MIGHT HAVE NOTICED THAT
I'VE UPGRADED TO CARDIGANS.Copy !req
22. THAT'S RIGHT,
NO MORE HOODIES.Copy !req
23. I'M WEARING NOTHING
BUT TIGHT-FITTING CARDIGANSCopy !req
24. LIKE I'M MR. ROGERS.Copy !req
25. GET USED TO IT.Copy !req
26. ON TODAY'S SHOW,Copy !req
27. WE GIVE THE TRON GUY
A MUCH-NEEDED WEB REDEMPTION.Copy !req
28. I LEARN NOT EVERYONE LOVESCopy !req
29. A "MACHO MAN" RANDY SAVAGE
IMPRESSION.Copy !req
30. WE TALK
TO YOUTUBE SENSATION FRED.Copy !req
31. AND IF THERE'S TIME,Copy !req
32. WE'LL TAKE BETS ON THE NEXT
CELEBRITY SUICIDE.Copy !req
33. YOU HEAR THAT?
I'D KNOW THAT SOUND ANYWHERE.Copy !req
34. IT'S OPRAH PEEING.Copy !req
35. YEAH, I'M TOLD SOMEONE
LOOPED THIS VIDEO,Copy !req
36. BUT I BELIEVE SHE REALLY
HAD TO GO SUPER BAD.Copy !req
37. AND YOU DON'T WANT TO HOLD IT.
THAT CAN LEAD TO A U.T.I.Copy !req
38. FACT—URINARY TRACT INFECTIONS
ARE NO JOKE.Copy !req
39. MY RECOMMENDATION—
A LOT OF CRANBERRY JUICE.Copy !req
40. ALL RIGHT,
LET'S SEXY UP THE SHOW.Copy !req
41. I GUESS DANCING AT SPRING BREAK
WAS ON HER BUCKET LIST.Copy !req
42. OHH...Copy !req
43. LET'S PUT 20 SECONDS
ON THE CLOCKCopy !req
44. AND SEE HOW MANY
FUNNY COMMENTS WE CAN POST.Copy !req
45. FINALLY, A WHITE CHICK
BLACK GUYS DON'T WANT.Copy !req
46. MY BEER GOGGLES
NEED BEER GOGGLES.Copy !req
47. SHE CAN MAKE
HER C-SECTION CLAP.Copy !req
48. WHATEVER. THE OLDER THE BERRY,
THE SWEETER THE JUICE...Copy !req
49. PRUNE JUICE.Copy !req
50. THE UPSIDE TO BANGING HERCopy !req
51. IS SHE PROBABLY CAN'T GET
PREGNANT ANYMORE.Copy !req
52. OH, SPRING BREAK.
SENIORS RULE!Copy !req
53. ALL RIGHT, PAY CLOSE ATTENTION
TO THIS NEXT VIDEO,Copy !req
54. BECAUSE IT IS ONE
OF MY PERSONAL FAVORITES.Copy !req
55. - MOTHER!
TAKE DAT!Copy !req
56. GOING TO D'JAIS IN MY CAR!
B-E-L...Copy !req
57. - M-A-R!Copy !req
58. - BABY BLUE,
I SEE YOU IN TWO WEEKS!Copy !req
59. BABY BLUE!Copy !req
60. - YOU GOTTA BE SMILING.
YOU GOTTA BE DANCING.Copy !req
61. YOU GOTTA BE
SHAKING THAT ASS!Copy !req
62. - YOU BETTER STEP IT UP,
MOTHER!Copy !req
63. - OH... I MISS BEING 37.Copy !req
64. I BET THE ENTIRE CARPOOL LANE
SMELLS LIKE AXE BODY SPRAY.Copy !req
65. YOU WANNA KNOW WHY
I LOVE THIS VIDEO SO MUCH?Copy !req
66. BECAUSE IT REMINDS ME
OF WHEN ME AND MY FRIENDSCopy !req
67. HEAD TO THE JERSEY SHORE.Copy !req
68. - NOW WE'RE TALKIN'
VIDEO STATUS.Copy !req
69. WHOA!
- WHOA!Copy !req
70. - MOTHERDJs!Copy !req
71. - WHO'S THAT DJ, BOY?Copy !req
72. - WOW! I'M READY!Copy !req
73. - ARE... YOU... READY?Copy !req
74. - GOING TO D'JAIS
IN MY CAR.Copy !req
75. B-E-L!
- M-A-R!Copy !req
76. - WHOO.Copy !req
77. - YO, THAT'S WHY I GOT
MY HAT ON!Copy !req
78. - BABY BLUE,
I SEE YOU IN TWO WEEKS.Copy !req
79. BABY BLUE!Copy !req
80. - YOU GOTTA BE SMILIN'.
YOU GOTTA BE DANCIN'.Copy !req
81. YOU GOTTA BE
SHAKIN' THAT ASS!Copy !req
82. - YOU BETTER STEP IT UP,
MOTHER!Copy !req
83. - WHOO!Copy !req
84. CAN'T WAIT TO WATCH THIS
ON MOTHERYOUTUBE!Copy !req
85. AND, YES, WE ALL GOT LAID
THAT WEEKEND.Copy !req
86. SHE IS STILL GOING!Copy !req
87. IT'S REALLY SOOTHING.Copy !req
88. NO WONDER STEDMAN AND GAYLE
SLEEP SO SOUNDLY.Copy !req
89. ALL RIGHT, KNOCK IT OFF.Copy !req
90. NORMALLY, I HATE CUTE VIDEOS,Copy !req
91. BUT THIS IS ONE
SMOOTH-ASS KID.Copy !req
92. I WILL GIVE YOU $100Copy !req
93. IF YOU CAN TEACH
MY ASIAN GIRLFRIEND TO DO THAT.Copy !req
94. IT'S IMPRESSIVE,
BUT HE CAN'T COLOR FOR.Copy !req
95. WE DID A LITTLE RESEARCH.Copy !req
96. IT TURNS OUT THE REASON
HE WAS IN SUCH A HURRYCopy !req
97. IS BECAUSE HE HAD
A DEAD HOOKER IN THE TRUNK...Copy !req
98. A TINY DEAD HOOKER...Copy !req
99. IN THE TRUNK.Copy !req
100. ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
101. - I CAN'T PUSH OFF.
I CAN'T.Copy !req
102. UHH!Copy !req
103. - COME ON, BRENDA!Copy !req
104. - OH! I'D BREAK MY OWN LEGCopy !req
105. BEFORE I LET
GILBERT GRAPE'S MOM RIDE ME.Copy !req
106. I THINK IT'S GREAT THAT
SHE'S OUTSIDE GETTING EXERCISE.Copy !req
107. AND IT'D BE EASY
TO MAKE A BUNCH OF FAT JOKES.Copy !req
108. AND THAT'S WHY WE'RE GONNA DO IT
IN THIS WEEK'S VIDEO BREAKDOWN.Copy !req
109. ALL RIGHT.
FIRST, NOTICE THE CAMO SHIRT.Copy !req
110. SHE GOT THAT
FROM AN ARMY-SURPLUS STORE.Copy !req
111. IT WAS USED TO PROVIDE SHELTER
FOR THREE PLATOONS.Copy !req
112. ALL RIGHT, ROLL IT.
IT STARTS OFF PRETTY HORRIBLE.Copy !req
113. I MEAN, IF YOU NEED THE HELP
OF A PICKUP TRUCKCopy !req
114. TO GET ON A HORSE,Copy !req
115. YOU SHOULD PROBABLY CHOOSE
ANOTHER LEISURE-TIME ACTIVITY.Copy !req
116. - I CAN'T.
- "I CAN'T"?Copy !req
117. YOU MEAN YOU SHOULDN'T.Copy !req
118. COME ON, BRENDA.
"I CAN'T"?Copy !req
119. THEN WHO'S GONNA AVENGE
THE DEATH OF YOUR BROTHER?Copy !req
120. - BACK.
BACK.Copy !req
121. - THIS IS TOO MUCH WORK.Copy !req
122. - I'LL TELL YOU WHO
IT'S TOO MUCH WORK FOR—Copy !req
123. THE HORSE.Copy !req
124. YOU KNOW THAT OLD EXPRESSION,Copy !req
125. "I'M SO HUNGRY,
I COULD EAT A HORSE"?Copy !req
126. I'M PRETTY SURE
THAT'S WHAT SPOOKED HIM.Copy !req
127. - YOU, DENNIS.Copy !req
128. - YOU LEAVE DENNIS
OUT OF THIS.Copy !req
129. HE'S LETTING YOU MAX OUT
THE PAYLOAD OF HIS TACOMA.Copy !req
130. ALL RIGHT!
SHE GETS ONE LEG OVER!Copy !req
131. IT'S GONNA HAPPEN!Copy !req
132. AND IF YOU LISTEN
REAL CAREFULLY,Copy !req
133. YOU CAN HEAR THE HORSE'S
SPIRIT AND SPINE BREAKING.Copy !req
134. - OH...Copy !req
135. - AH...Copy !req
136. AND SHE'S OFF.
FUN RIDE, THOUGH.Copy !req
137. THIS IS WHAT ROCK BOTTOM
LOOKS LIKE.Copy !req
138. IT'S OKAY, BRENDA.
YOU CAN STILL RIDE THE TRUCK.Copy !req
139. AND AS FOR DENNIS,Copy !req
140. WHO HAD THE FORESIGHT
TO STAND FAR ENOUGH BACKCopy !req
141. SO THAT HE COULD GET
ALL OF THAT COWGIRL IN FRAMECopy !req
142. AND PUT IT ON THE INTERNET—
YOU, DENNIS.Copy !req
143. YOU SO MUCH.Copy !req
144. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACKCopy !req
145. WITH THE TRON GUY'S
WEB REDEMPTION.Copy !req
146. BUT FIRST, DID YOU KNOW THAT
SOME PEOPLE LOOK AT THE INTERNETCopy !req
147. WHILE THEY'RE STONED?Copy !req
148. YEAH, I KNOW, APPALLING.Copy !req
149. WELL, AT HIGHDEAS,Copy !req
150. THESE POTHEADS
CAN POST THEIR RAMBLINGS.Copy !req
151. ENJOY.Copy !req
152. - I CAME UP WITH THE CONCEPT
FOR THIS TRON-GUY COSTUMECopy !req
153. BY GOING
TO A SCIENCE-FICTION CONVENTIONCopy !req
154. THAT ALSO WAS A CROSSOVER
TO A COMPUTER CONVENTION.Copy !req
155. THE INTERNET BROUGHT
THE TRON GUY TO LIFECopy !req
156. BY LITERALLY
BRINGING HIM TO LIFE.Copy !req
157. - OH! YOU DON'T NEED
A TIME MACHINECopy !req
158. TO KNOW THAT GUY GOT TONS
OF ASS IN HIGH SCHOOL.Copy !req
159. TRON IS A MOVIE FROM THE '80sCopy !req
160. WHERE A DUDE GETS SUCKED
INTO A COMPUTER.Copy !req
161. TO BE HONEST, I COULDN'T EVEN
MAKE IT THROUGH THE TRAILER.Copy !req
162. SO I'M NOT ENTIRELY SURECopy !req
163. HOW ACCURATELY THIS GUY
HAS EMBARRASSED HIMSELF,Copy !req
164. BUT I'M GUESSING
HE DID A GOOD JOB.Copy !req
165. THERE ARE WORSE MOVIE THEMES
TRON GUY COULD HAVE CHOSEN.Copy !req
166. HE COULD HAVE BEEN
JENNIFER'S BODY GUY.Copy !req
167. UGH! BY THE WAY,
DIABLO CODY,Copy !req
168. IF THAT IS YOUR REAL
STAGE NAME,Copy !req
169. YOU KEEP WRITING
TURDS LIKE THIS,Copy !req
170. AND YOU'RE GONNA HAVE
TO RETURN THAT OSCAR,Copy !req
171. HOP BACK ON THE POLE
FOR THOSE TWO-FOR-ONES.Copy !req
172. BUT I DIGRESS.Copy !req
173. WHAT REALLY AMAZES MECopy !req
174. IS HOW FAMOUS TRON GUY
HAS BECOME.Copy !req
175. SINCE WHEN DID MAKING
A TRON COSTUMECopy !req
176. OR CARRYING A LIGHTSABER
TURN YOU INTO A CELEBRITY?Copy !req
177. I'VE ALWAYS LOOKED UP TO PEOPLE
WHO COULD SLAY,Copy !req
178. NOT DRAGONS.Copy !req
179. BUT IN THEIR DEFENSE,
THE GATHERINGCopy !req
180. IS NO DIFFERENT THAN PLAYING
FANTASY FOOTBALLCopy !req
181. OR WATCHING PORN.Copy !req
182. IT'S ALL JUST A WAY
TO ESCAPE REALITY.Copy !req
183. TRON GUY DOESN'T CARE
WHAT YOU THINK.Copy !req
184. HE JUST GENUINELY LOVES TRON,
AND I RESPECT THAT.Copy !req
185. I USED TO BE DEEP
INTO THE CLUB SCENE,Copy !req
186. SO I KNOW HOW IT FEELS TO DRESS
LIKE A COMPLETE DOUCHE BAG.Copy !req
187. THAT'S WHY I DECIDED TO BEAM
JAY, AKA TRON GUY, TO HOLLYWOODCopy !req
188. IN THIS WEEK'S WEB REDEMPTION.Copy !req
189. HELLO.Copy !req
190. HAS THE TRON PARTY OF TWO
SHOWN UP?Copy !req
191. TELL ME WHY YOU LOVE
THE MOVIE TRON.Copy !req
192. - TRON REALLY CAUGHT
MY IMAGINATION,Copy !req
193. BUT I NEVER REALLY HAD
ANY OUTLET FOR IT.Copy !req
194. IT STRUCK ME THAT TRON,Copy !req
195. BEING A SCIENCE-FICTION MOVIE
ABOUT COMPUTERS,Copy !req
196. WOULD BE A PERFECT SOURCE
TO DRAW INSPIRATION FROM.Copy !req
197. - IT LOOKS LIKE A LOT OF SPANDEXCopy !req
198. AND THEN JUST
SOME HOCKEY EQUIPMENT.Copy !req
199. - ACTUALLY, THAT'S A PRETTY
GOOD DESCRIPTION.Copy !req
200. - WELL, I THINK
YOU DID A GREAT JOB.Copy !req
201. - THE UNITARD
WAS CUSTOM-MADE AND DYED.Copy !req
202. THIS COLOR PAINT I PICKEDCopy !req
203. BECAUSE I THOUGHT
IT CLOSELY MATCHED THE COLOR.Copy !req
204. THESE ARE FOOTBALL
SHOULDER GUARDS.Copy !req
205. THIS IS FORM PVC.Copy !req
206. THIS IS ELECTROLUMINESCENT WIRE
THAT'S THREADED THROUGH HOLES...Copy !req
207. THE HELMET—YOU'RE RIGHT,
IT'S A HOCKEY HELMET.Copy !req
208. THIS IS THE SAME HOCKEY HELMETCopy !req
209. THEY USED FOR THE CHARACTERS
IN THE MOVIE.Copy !req
210. - DO YOU READ
WHAT PEOPLE WRITE?Copy !req
211. - I DO, BUT I DECIDED THAT,
IN THE END,Copy !req
212. I WAS GONNA HAVE FUN MY WAY.Copy !req
213. IF THEY DIDN'T LIKE IT,
THAT WAS THEIR PROBLEM.Copy !req
214. - WHO'S LAUGHING NOW?
- EXACTLY.Copy !req
215. I'M SITTING HERE TALKING
TO THE GUYCopy !req
216. ON COMEDY CENTRAL, AFTER ALL.Copy !req
217. - A GUY.Copy !req
218. ARE YOU READY
TO BEGIN OUR TRAINING?Copy !req
219. - LET'S DO IT.
- LET'S PLAY SOME FRISBEE.Copy !req
220. - IT'S AN IDENTITY DISK.
- IDENTITY DISK.Copy !req
221. DOES TRON HAVE ANY, UH—
- WHAT?Copy !req
222. HEADS UP!Copy !req
223. TERM—BOY, THAT WAS
LOUSY, WASN'T IT?Copy !req
224. WHOOPS!Copy !req
225. HEY, GOOD CATCH!Copy !req
226. EHH.Copy !req
227. HEY.
BOY, THAT WAS USELESS.Copy !req
228. - ALL RIGHT, ENOUGH
OF THE IDENTITY DISK.Copy !req
229. LET'S WORK ON YOUR CARDIO.Copy !req
230. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN
ON A TRON CYCLE?Copy !req
231. - NOPE.
- ARE THEY FAST?Copy !req
232. - I'M NOT SURE THAT FAST HOLDS
ANY MEANING IN THAT UNIVERSE.Copy !req
233. - AH...Copy !req
234. - YOU KNOW,
WHEN YOU START THINKINGCopy !req
235. ABOUT WHAT GOES ON
INSIDE A COMPUTERCopy !req
236. AND TURNING IT
INTO SOMETHINGCopy !req
237. THAT A HUMAN SUCKED INTO
THE MACHINE COULD UNDERSTAND,Copy !req
238. YOU HAVE
TO ANTHROPOMORPHIZE IT,Copy !req
239. AND...Copy !req
240. - LEFT!Copy !req
241. RIGHT!Copy !req
242. RIGHT.
- COME ON. AH!Copy !req
243. - OUR IDEA
FOR THE WEB REDEMPTION,Copy !req
244. SINCE YOU ALREADY
HAVE THE SUIT,Copy !req
245. WAS TO GET YOU
IN THE TRON WORLD.Copy !req
246. HOW DOES THAT SOUND TO YOU?
- THAT SOUNDS FANTASTIC.Copy !req
247. - I HOPE YOU'RE UP
FOR THE BATTLE.Copy !req
248. - I THINK I AM.Copy !req
249. YOU LOOK WONDERFUL.Copy !req
250. YOU'RE IN TOP
PHYSICAL CONDITION.Copy !req
251. THE WORLD WANTS TO KNOW,Copy !req
252. ARE YOU READY TO GIVE IT
ANOTHER SHOT?Copy !req
253. - LET'S DO IT.Copy !req
254. - GOOD LUCK.
AND MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU.Copy !req
255. - UM...Copy !req
256. - OH, MY GOODNESS!
IT WORKS!Copy !req
257. ENJOY THE RIDE, TRON GUY!Copy !req
258. I'LL SEE HIM
ON THE OTHER SIDE.Copy !req
259. - NOW THAT I'VE ENTERED
THE MACHINE,Copy !req
260. MY POWERS
HAVE NEVER BEEN STRONGER.Copy !req
261. - NOT SO FAST, TRON GUY.Copy !req
262. ONE MORE STEP,
AND THE GIRL GETS IT.Copy !req
263. - SAVE ME, TRON GUY,
SAVE ME!Copy !req
264. - LET HER GO.Copy !req
265. - FIRST, YOU'LL HAVE
TO CATCH ME.Copy !req
266. - STAY BACK, OR THE GIRL
WILL BE DEREZED.Copy !req
267. - THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK.Copy !req
268. - NO!Copy !req
269. - BY THE POWER OF MY USER.Copy !req
270. OOH... OOH...Copy !req
271. - I LOVE YOU, TRON GUY.Copy !req
272. - OH, YOU WILL BE MISSED,
TRON GUY.Copy !req
273. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK
WITH FRED.Copy !req
274. BUT FIRST, HERE'S YOUR TOSH.0
UNSPONSORED PRANK OF THE WEEK.Copy !req
275. - AAH!Copy !req
276. - AND NOW...Copy !req
277. OH, YEAH.Copy !req
278. - I DON'T UNDERSTAND.Copy !req
279. - OH, I UNDERSTAND CRYSTAL!Copy !req
280. YOU'RE GOING TO A HOME,
OLD MAN!Copy !req
281. OH, YE-AH!Copy !req
282. - I'M GONNA JUMP!Copy !req
283. - HO HO HO OH!Copy !req
284. THE ONLY WAY
YOU'RE GOIN' OFF THIS ROOFCopy !req
285. IS IF I THROW YOU.Copy !req
286. OH, YE-AH!Copy !req
287. OH HO HO!Copy !req
288. IT LOOKS LIKE YOU MISSED
A SPOT OVER THERE.Copy !req
289. OH, YE-AH!Copy !req
290. OH, IT'S TIME TO GO
TO SLEEP, LITTLE GIRL.Copy !req
291. OH, YE-AH!Copy !req
292. LIGHTS OUT!Copy !req
293. - AND THAT WAS...Copy !req
294. OH, YEAH.Copy !req
295. - OH, YE-AH.Copy !req
296. IF YOU THINK YOU HAVE
A MORE INAPPROPRIATE PLACECopy !req
297. TO DO A MACHO MAN
RANDY SAVAGE IMPRESSION,Copy !req
298. FILM IT AND SEND IT TO US AT...Copy !req
299. ALL RIGHT.
HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF FRED?Copy !req
300. ME NEITHER.Copy !req
301. HE'S THE MOST SUBSCRIBED TO
PERSON ON YOUTUBE.Copy !req
302. HE'S GOTTEN
OVER 300 MILLION HITS.Copy !req
303. HE HAS A CLOTHING LINE
AT HOT TOPIC,Copy !req
304. NOT TO MENTION
HE HAS A MOVIE DEAL.Copy !req
305. SO LET'S TAKE A LOOK
AT WHAT MADE HIM SO FAMOUS.Copy !req
306. - IF YOU'RE WONDERINGCopy !req
307. WHY I'M ACTING
RATHER EXTRAORDINARY RIGHT NOW,Copy !req
308. IT'S BECAUSE I HAVEN'T
TAKEN MY PILL!Copy !req
309. - WELL, THAT'LL NEVER
GET OLD.Copy !req
310. ALL RIGHT, SINCE I OBVIOUSLY
DON'T GET IT,Copy !req
311. I INVITED FRED
FOR A LIVE WEB CHATCopy !req
312. TO EXPLAIN
WHY I SHOULDN'T HATE HIM.Copy !req
313. PLEASE WELCOME
THE YOUTUBE PHENOMENON, FRED!Copy !req
314. FRED, YOU'RE PROBABLY PRETTY
EXCITED TO BE ON MY SHOW.Copy !req
315. - I'VE NEVER HEARD OF YOU.Copy !req
316. - OH. WELL, I'M EXCITED
TO MEET YOU, FRED.Copy !req
317. - YOU'RE TALKING TO LUCAS.Copy !req
318. FRED IS A CHARACTER, SO...
HE'S NOT REAL. HA.Copy !req
319. - HA. WELL, UH...Copy !req
320. I ASKED MY TWITTER FOLLOWERS
IF THEY HAD ANY QUESTIONS,Copy !req
321. AND TRAVER31 WANTED TO KNOW...Copy !req
322. COULD YOU ANSWER THAT?Copy !req
323. - NO, I CAN'T.
I WOULD—Copy !req
324. I CAN'T HOLD MY BREATH
FOR 45 MINUTES.Copy !req
325. - YOU SHOULD TRY.Copy !req
326. WILL YOUR MOVIE BE THE END
OF THIS FRED THING?Copy !req
327. - YEAH, I ACTUALLY—Copy !req
328. YEAH, THE FRED MOVIE
IS PROBABLY GONNA BE, LIKE,Copy !req
329. ONE OF THE LAST FRED THINGS,Copy !req
330. SO I WON'T BE DOING IT
TOO MUCH LONGER.Copy !req
331. - AW...Copy !req
332. WELL, THANK YOU SO MUCH
FOR COMING ON, FRED.Copy !req
333. I APPRECIATE IT.Copy !req
334. - YEAH.
THANKS FOR HAVING ME.Copy !req
335. - WHO'D HAVE GUESSED HE'D HAVE
A INTERNET CONNECTION?Copy !req
336. WELL, I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND
WHY HE'S SO POPULAR.Copy !req
337. MAYBE YOU NEED TO CHECK WITH
FRED'S NUMBER-ONE FAN, JAKE,Copy !req
338. WHO'S A 10-YEAR-OLD BOY.Copy !req
339. UH, JAKE, THANKS
FOR BEING ON THE SHOW.Copy !req
340. - PLEASURE TO BE HERE, DANIEL.Copy !req
341. - HEY, WHY IS FRED FUNNY?Copy !req
342. - WELL, I THINK HE'S FUNNY,
BECAUSE, UM,Copy !req
343. HE—HE TALKS LIKE—
YAAAH, YAH, YAH, YAH,Copy !req
344. AND HE MAKES LIKE REALLY
WEIRD FACES, AND, UM...Copy !req
345. AND HE HAS REALLY GOOD JOKES.Copy !req
346. - ALL RIGHT,
STAY OFF THE JESUS JUICE!Copy !req
347. - REMEMBER TO KEEP OUR SECRET.Copy !req
348. I CAN ONLY HOPE THAT JAKE
IS AS PASSIONATE ABOUT FRED—Copy !req
349. - HANG IN THERE.
IT GETS WORSE.Copy !req
350. MAYBE IF I SLOW FRED DOWN,Copy !req
351. I CAN HEAR WHAT
HE'S REALLY SAYING.Copy !req
352. - OBAMA IS A MUSLIM.Copy !req
353. SHOW ME THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE.Copy !req
354. - HA HA!
NOW I GET IT!Copy !req
355. NOT ONLY IS FRED
A COMEDY GENIUS,Copy !req
356. BUT HE'S ALSO
AN EXTREME CONSERVATIVE.Copy !req
357. DID YOU HAVE
ASPARAGUS, OPRAH?Copy !req
358. THAT IS RANCID.Copy !req
359. ALL RIGHT,
AS FRED HAS SHOWN US,Copy !req
360. ANYONE CAN BECOME FAMOUS
ON THE INTERNET.Copy !req
361. ALL YOU HAVE TO DO
IS GO TO OUR WEBSITE,Copy !req
362. UPLOAD YOUR CLIP FOR A CHANCECopy !req
363. TO BE OUR VIEWER VIDEO
OF THE WEEK.Copy !req
364. THIS WEEK'S WINNER
IS FRONTPAGEFILMS.COM.Copy !req
365. - ALL RIGHT.
SO IF YOU DON'T MIND,Copy !req
366. I'M JUST GONNA GRADUALLY
WEAVE YOUR DIAGNOSISCopy !req
367. INTO, LIKE, A NORMAL,
EVERYDAY CONVERSATION.Copy !req
368. DOES THAT... SOUND LIKE
SOMETHING WE CAN DO?Copy !req
369. - SURE.
- YEAH.Copy !req
370. HOW—HOW ARE YOU?Copy !req
371. - FINE.Copy !req
372. - THAT'S WEIRD,
'CAUSE YOU HAVE LEUKEMIA.Copy !req
373. - AH...
THANKS, GUYS.Copy !req
374. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK
WITH MORE RENO 911.Copy !req
375. OH, TOO SOON.Copy !req
376. - WELCOME BACK.Copy !req
377. HOW WERE THE COMMERCIALS?Copy !req
378. I THINK THAT'S FUNNY.Copy !req
379. IT'S BEEN A GREAT SUMMER
FOR CELEBRITY DEATH POOLS.Copy !req
380. I WENT 16 AND 0.
YEAH. IT'S TOO EASY.Copy !req
381. THAT'S WHY WE AT TOSH.0Copy !req
382. CREATED THE FIRST
CELEBRITY SUICIDE POOL.Copy !req
383. GO TO OUR WEBSITE.
GIVE US YOUR PICKS.Copy !req
384. A FEW RULES—
ACCIDENTAL OVERDOSES DO COUNT.Copy !req
385. - HE TOOK A FISTFUL OF PILLS.
HE KNEW HOW THAT NAP WOULD END.Copy !req
386. BUT REALITY STARS
DO NOT COUNT AS CELEBRITIES.Copy !req
387. THEY DON'T COUNT,
SO DON'T PICK 'EM.Copy !req
388. AND WHILE I HOPE NO ONE WINS,
IF ANYONE KNOWS MISCHA BARTON,Copy !req
389. COULD YOU PLEASE REMIND HERCopy !req
390. THAT SHE HAS NOTHING
TO LIVE FOR?Copy !req
391. BECAUSE I COULD REALLY
USE THAT $50.Copy !req
392. AND IF SHE DOES KILL HERSELF,
DON'T WORRY.Copy !req
393. I WILL USE THAT $50
FOR CHARITY.Copy !req
394. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WATCHING.Copy !req
395. MAKE SURE YOU WATCH NEXT WEEK
WHEN I HEAD TO ADULTCONCopy !req
396. TO TEACH PORN STARS
A THING OR TWO ABOUT FETISHES.Copy !req
397. AND WE ALSO GIVE THE BACKYARD
WRESTLER A WEB REDEMPTION.Copy !req
398. - HERE HE GOES—
MY GOD, MY GOD!Copy !req
399. - DON'T WORRY.
WRESTLING'S FAKE.Copy !req
400. AND DON'T FORGET TO GO TO OUR
WEBSITE COMEDYCENTRAL.COM/TOSH.0Copy !req
401. TO SUBMIT YOUR INAPPROPRIATECopy !req
402. "MACHO MAN" RANDY SAVAGE
IMPRESSIONS.Copy !req
403. ALSO FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER,Copy !req
404. AND CHECK MY TOUR DATES,
SO I CAN OFFEND YOU IN PERSON.Copy !req
405. LAST EPISODE,
I ASKED YOU TO GUESSCopy !req
406. WHAT CASTRO AND I
WERE LOOKING AT.Copy !req
407. OUT OF 1,700
WHO SUBMITTED AN ANSWER,Copy !req
408. OVER 350 OF YOU GUESSED
I WAS LOOKING AT A PENIS.Copy !req
409. I'M NOT MAKING THAT NUMBER UP.Copy !req
410. YOU WERE RIGHT.
I WAS LOOKING AT A PENIS.Copy !req
411. YOU GUYS KNOW ME SO WELL.Copy !req
412. NO. I WAS LOOKING
AT A SQUEAK TOYCopy !req
413. THAT JUST SO HAPPENED
TO BE HANGINGCopy !req
414. FROM A VEINY,
UNCIRCUMCISED PENIS.Copy !req
415. GOOD NIGHT.
SEE YA NEXT WEEK.Copy !req