1. So here they are.Copy !req
2. This is Amber, Alexis,
Reagan, Molly, and Vicki.Copy !req
3. We all used to wait tables together
back in the day.Copy !req
4. Well, thank you, everybody, for coming.Copy !req
5. And I just wanna say
that we want you to feel comfortable.Copy !req
6. So if at any point you are not,
you know, please let me know.Copy !req
7. Holy shit. Looks like
we got a superstar in the pack.Copy !req
8. - Are you talking about me?
- She talks like that?Copy !req
9. You're amazing.Copy !req
10. I mean, I think you're all beautiful, so...Copy !req
11. Classic hottest-one shit to say.Copy !req
12. Okay, you're all beautiful.Copy !req
13. And just to cover our bases,
what we are doing here is,Copy !req
14. when we're washing the cars,
we're also checking the tire depth.Copy !req
15. Hmm, sexy.Copy !req
16. I mean, it is when you do it.Copy !req
17. Anyway, this is a tire depth gauge,
and, um...Copy !req
18. Oops. Oops. Pink top. Yep.Copy !req
19. This is a tire depth gauge,
and it is yellow or red.Copy !req
20. That means that they need tires,Copy !req
21. and we sell tires
cheaper than the competition.Copy !req
22. Oh, and then you would upsell
from there, right?Copy !req
23. Whoa!Copy !req
24. - Amber?
Yeah.Copy !req
25. My dad was a mechanic.Copy !req
26. - You're Will's favorite.
- I don't have a favorite!Copy !req
27. - I do.
Okay.Copy !req
28. And also, this does not have to be slutty.Copy !req
29. - Yes, it does.
It doesn't.Copy !req
30. It can be classy, you know?Copy !req
31. Um, business-like.Copy !req
32. Yeah, slut... Business-slut casual.Copy !req
33. Think of, like, a slutty lawyer.Copy !req
34. You know what I mean? Slut...Copy !req
35. I can't think of any other jobs
women should have, but slut women jobs.Copy !req
36. Ooh, ooh, ooh!Copy !req
37. - I don't think we should be drinking.
- Whoa. I don't feel comfortable.Copy !req
38. You being fucking sexist?Copy !req
39. Not bad, Willie!Copy !req
40. - Not bad!
- Ugh! Shane!Copy !req
41. They're good.Copy !req
42. - This thing's gonna work.
- It's going better than I thought.Copy !req
43. - I thought we were gonna get five Kilahs.
- I thought so too!Copy !req
44. You see Alexis?Copy !req
45. I definitely saw her.
When she stuck her tongue out at you?Copy !req
46. Yeah!
- Holy shit!Copy !req
47. Did you see the way Amber looked at me?Copy !req
48. - No.
- You obviously saw it!Copy !req
49. You interrupted the whole... I mean, it was...Copy !req
50. Listen, I gotta do inventory, so...Copy !req
51. What are you talking about?Copy !req
52. I'm talking about business
that I have to—Copy !req
53. Don't worry about business, dude.
This is a "plesh" day.Copy !req
54. - No, no, no, no!
- I'm gonna have five or six brewskis.Copy !req
55. Five or six?Copy !req
56. Seven or eight. Good call.Copy !req
57. Absolutely... You'll black out!Copy !req
58. I'm not gonna black out.Copy !req
59. I'm gonna level with you.Copy !req
60. - I'm probably gonna black out today.
- Do not black out at work today.Copy !req
61. - There's no way I'm not getting fucked up.
- Shane.Copy !req
62. - Have a little fun.
- We are!Copy !req
63. - Amber was giving you the eyes.
- Thank you!Copy !req
64. - That's a five-or-six-brewski day.
- What?Copy !req
65. Two or three brewskis.Copy !req
66. All right, fine.
Two or three, but eat a lot of chips.Copy !req
67. Deal.Copy !req
68. Six.Copy !req
69. Come on!
- Have fun a little.Copy !req
70. - I am, but you can't—
- There's beautiful girls in the shop!Copy !req
71. Get excited!Copy !req
72. - Shane, I am excited!
- Get excited a little.Copy !req
73. Uh...
- Oh, hello.Copy !req
74. Will?Copy !req
75. - That's me.
- Hi, I'm Lydia.Copy !req
76. Lydia!Copy !req
77. Did your father mention I was coming?Copy !req
78. Uh, no.Copy !req
79. Nah. Will's been crushing too much
to talk to his dad.Copy !req
80. Well, I'm Lydia
from Marilyn's Mufflers.Copy !req
81. I've been negotiating the buyout
with your father.Copy !req
82. I'm just here to take some quick photos,
make sure the roof's not leaking,Copy !req
83. lifts work,
and then I'll be out of your hair.Copy !req
84. Wait, wait, wait! Stay in my hair
for a second 'cause, um, negotiations?Copy !req
85. I... I... I thought that they... or we were just
talking about negotiations.Copy !req
86. Uh, probably a conversation
for you and your dad.Copy !req
87. I will be quick.Copy !req
88. Oh, uh, w... w... wait, wait, wait!Copy !req
89. Lydia, um, quick question.Copy !req
90. If there were gonna be a, um...Copy !req
91. A buyout?Copy !req
92. Yeah, like, what would happen
to... the staff?Copy !req
93. If a buyout happens,
which, frankly, is looking to be the case,Copy !req
94. typically, we would absorb
good technicians and counter people,Copy !req
95. but any management...Copy !req
96. Well...Copy !req
97. Jesus.Copy !req
98. I'm gonna take those photos
to send to the team and your father,Copy !req
99. and then I'll be on my way.Copy !req
100. Oh, wait, Lydia.
You're sending the pictures to my dad?Copy !req
101. Yeah. Do you need me
to say everything again?Copy !req
102. You know,
if you're gonna be sending photos,Copy !req
103. I mean, always a good place to start
is, uh, out front.Copy !req
104. You know, like, any sort of photo display.Copy !req
105. Hey, Shane, would you
clean up the mess out back?Copy !req
106. What mess?Copy !req
107. The mess.Copy !req
108. Oh shit. Yes. Yeah, I'll get it.Copy !req
109. All right, my beautiful angels.
Yes. Yeah. Wow.Copy !req
110. Nice. You guys look... This is good.Copy !req
111. Look, we gotta get up.
We gotta get out of here.Copy !req
112. - Where are we going?
- There's a lady coming.Copy !req
113. If she sees you dumpster mermaids
back here, she'll be pissed off.Copy !req
114. Then the car wash is canceled,
and then Will's fucked.Copy !req
115. So, you know, we gotta go.Copy !req
116. Get up. Come on.Copy !req
117. Go out here. Follow me.Copy !req
118. - Grab the beer. You.
- I got it.Copy !req
119. Grab it. Nice.Copy !req
120. Workhorses.Copy !req
121. I know it seems weird, but do you guys
mind hanging out in here for a second?Copy !req
122. I'm not getting into
a shipping container!Copy !req
123. It's just for a minute. Just...Copy !req
124. Yeah, right. Next thing you know,
we'll end up on Epstein's island.Copy !req
125. If you guys showed up
on Epstein's island, they'd be furious.Copy !req
126. "No, the pussy is spoiled! Send it back!"Copy !req
127. - Dude. You're, like, way older than us.
- You're, like, old enough to be our dad.Copy !req
128. It's pretty hot when you put it like that.Copy !req
129. No. The only reason we're here
is 'cause Kilah fuckin' asked us.Copy !req
130. We are not getting in
a shipping container.Copy !req
131. No.Copy !req
132. All right, fine. Fucking... Let me think.Copy !req
133. What are you guys doing?Copy !req
134. Uh, what?Copy !req
135. What are you guys doing?Copy !req
136. Just trying to get these women
into a shipping container.Copy !req
137. - Oh, nice!
- It's not as easy as you'd think.Copy !req
138. I thought it was gonna be a cinch,
but they're... they're reluctant.Copy !req
139. Typical.Copy !req
140. - You guys sure you don't wanna get in?
No!Copy !req
141. You, uh...Copy !req
142. you guys want some sandwiches?Copy !req
143. - Let's get a sandwich.Copy !req
144. Yeah. Herding cats, dude.
They'll come. Go.Copy !req
145. Will! What's up, dude?Copy !req
146. Hey, uh, it's probably nothing,
but some lady might stop by.Copy !req
147. Yeah. Lydia. She's already here.Copy !req
148. Why didn't you tell me
it was this serious?Copy !req
149. I didn't know myself, Will. Okay?Copy !req
150. Your dad's not telling people a lot
about what's going on.Copy !req
151. What's going on over there?
Everything all right?Copy !req
152. What are the vibes? They good?
She happy? Jokin' around with everybody?Copy !req
153. Yeah, she came in like,
"Knock, knock!"Who's there?"Copy !req
154. "Your fucking jobs are gone!"Copy !req
155. She's a real hoot, you dumb fuck!Copy !req
156. Okay. Will, I understand
you're under a lot of pressure now,Copy !req
157. but I'm still your superior!Copy !req
158. Yeah. Okay. Well, you're gonna be
picking me up in an Uber, Dave.Copy !req
159. You should've seen the way
she was fucking looking at me.Copy !req
160. Pigs to slaughter!Copy !req
161. Oh fuck.Copy !req
162. God damn, Miles. You don't have
any air conditioning back here?Copy !req
163. I do. It's broken.Copy !req
164. Fucking divorce is killing me!Copy !req
165. I'm a little behind on the bills.Copy !req
166. There's five sets of tits in here.
You're gonna bring up your dead wife?Copy !req
167. - Ex-wife.
- Whatever. Don't bring up wives.Copy !req
168. Okay. Uh...Copy !req
169. You guys want some hoagies?
Best food in town.Copy !req
170. Huh? Little carbo-load
before we get out there?Copy !req
171. - Uh-uh. I don't eat meat.
- Of course you don't. You're perfect.Copy !req
172. You hear that, other girls?
Don't sit scarfing meat all the time.Copy !req
173. What do you eat?
Fuckin' Slim Jims or something?Copy !req
174. What do you eat? Fat Jims?Copy !req
175. What the fuck?Copy !req
176. It is so hot.Copy !req
177. It's the good kind of hot.Copy !req
178. It's not.Copy !req
179. This fucking sucks, dude.Copy !req
180. So you're not gonna replace,
like, all the mechanics, right?Copy !req
181. Just...Copy !req
182. Just like one or—Copy !req
183. To be determined.Copy !req
184. You know, I... I love cars.Copy !req
185. They're my passion.Copy !req
186. I feel like I'm better
communicating with themCopy !req
187. than I am with people.Copy !req
188. - I do most of the work—
- I'm gonna take some pictures over there.Copy !req
189. here. Okay, you need help?Copy !req
190. She mention anything about jobs?Copy !req
191. Well, just that
mechanics and salespeople are fine.Copy !req
192. I don't give a fuck about them!
What about management?Copy !req
193. The managers? They're gonna hook us up
to blow job machines and...Copy !req
194. We're fucking fired, you fat slob!Copy !req
195. - Thank you.
- Oh, no! Wait, Lydia!Copy !req
196. - Hold on. Let me talk to you!
- No. I have to go.Copy !req
197. The fuck's going on?Copy !req
198. Did she leave? What is that?Copy !req
199. - Keep her there. I'm on my way.
- Oh, Dave. Listen to this...Copy !req
200. Come on! Let's wash some cars!
Let's sell some tires!Copy !req
201. - Hi!
- Hello.Copy !req
202. Your car's so dirty.Copy !req
203. This is great.Copy !req
204. Everyone's having fun.Copy !req
205. Customers love it.Copy !req
206. - You have a beautiful mind.
Thank you.Copy !req
207. - I go to church.
Oh.Copy !req
208. Oh yeah.Copy !req
209. All his tires are completely bare.
They're fucked.Copy !req
210. Oh, um, hey, mister?Copy !req
211. Do you know
that your tires are, like, so bald?Copy !req
212. Why don't you come inside with me?Copy !req
213. We've got the cheapest tires.Copy !req
214. They're so cheap, and they're so thick.
You're gonna love 'em!Copy !req
215. Damn, Reagan.
Reagan's gonna make these guys pop.Copy !req
216. I don't know if I have time.Copy !req
217. It won't take that long, baby.
You know that! Come on in!Copy !req
218. I love you.Copy !req
219. I love her.Copy !req
220. Come on, big boy.Copy !req
221. It'll only take a few minutes.Copy !req
222. I won't tell your wife.Copy !req
223. We're gonna feel so hot
with our big, buff, strong, new tires.Copy !req
224. - Come on.
Come on in and get some tires!Copy !req
225. Car's all nice and wet!Copy !req
226. Okay, I'll do it!Copy !req
227. - Okay!
Come on!Copy !req
228. Let me get this windshield nice and cl—Copy !req
229. - Ooh!
- Oh fuck!Copy !req
230. - Are you okay?
- Oh my God! Alexis!Copy !req
231. What the fuck?
- No!Copy !req
232. What the fuck? Fuck!Copy !req
233. Oh!Copy !req
234. Is it bad?Copy !req
235. Not terrible!
You're conscious! That's good!Copy !req
236. - She's bleeding!Copy !req
237. - Turn off the music! It's on her phone!
- Get her phone! Get her phone!Copy !req
238. - All right.
Turn off the music!Copy !req
239. You gotta unlock it with her face.
Can you look up?Copy !req
240. - Hey! There she is!
- Oh boy!Copy !req
241. Do I need a medic or something?Copy !req
242. - Nah, you look good.Copy !req
243. - So it's gonna be a day for the glass.Copy !req
244. Obviously, it's on us.Copy !req
245. God dammit!Copy !req
246. Here we fucking go.Copy !req
247. Let's go!Copy !req
248. I'm gonna get hit.Copy !req
249. - Sad sack of shit!
There's numbers to call.Copy !req
250. - But she takes my phone.
Fuckin' loser!Copy !req
251. She gives me a phone
where I can only call my parents.Copy !req
252. I'm really not much of
a marriage counselor,Copy !req
253. but that sounds like something
you should get out of, you know?Copy !req
254. Let's go!Copy !req
255. Thanks for nothing.Copy !req
256. How was your soapy little strip club?
Nice, fancy mesh shorts!Copy !req
257. I see what you were trying to do,
you piece of shit! Get in the car!Copy !req
258. Get in the back seat!
You do not... Absolutely not!Copy !req
259. And don't even look at me!Copy !req
260. You better fuckin' look at me
when I'm talking to you! I swear to God!Copy !req
261. This was not a good start! I'm fucked!Copy !req
262. - You're not fucked, dude.
- This was a bad idea.Copy !req
263. This was not a bad idea, dude.Copy !req
264. This was a great idea.Copy !req
265. I got this, dude.Copy !req
266. You're not gonna be a waitress.Copy !req
267. Hey, let's go! Cut the chatter.
Let's take a knee.Copy !req
268. One knee!Copy !req
269. It's concrete, so go slow.Copy !req
270. There we go!Copy !req
271. Look, I'm gonna be straight with you.
Me and Will are fucked.Copy !req
272. We thought this whole cheap tires thing
was gonna save the whole shop.Copy !req
273. It's not. We got butt-fucked.
We haven't sold a fucking thing yet.Copy !req
274. Alexis got a concussion,
which probably isn't gonna help.Copy !req
275. And I'm wasted again. I don't even know
how the fuck that happened.Copy !req
276. But we need you guys... bad.Copy !req
277. You're all we've got.Copy !req
278. I know we're down
our star player right now,Copy !req
279. but if we combine
all the good parts of you guys,Copy !req
280. we could get pretty much one of her.Copy !req
281. Look, I'm just like you guys.Copy !req
282. I'm in my mid-thirties.
Shit's not going well.Copy !req
283. I had the whole world in front of me,Copy !req
284. and now every opportunity I have
just withers and diesCopy !req
285. before I can even grab it. Just...Copy !req
286. I'm sure when you were 22,Copy !req
287. you probably thought
you were gonna marry some cool, hot,Copy !req
288. white football player.Copy !req
289. And now look at you. You're in bikinis
in a garage on the ground.Copy !req
290. It's pathetic, actually.Copy !req
291. I'm pathetic.Copy !req
292. Maybe I shouldn't have
fucked around in high school.Copy !req
293. Maybe I should chill on the drinking.Copy !req
294. Maybe the whole party's over.Copy !req
295. But fuck that.Copy !req
296. - I mean, fuck that, right?Copy !req
297. Party's not over.
Maybe the party hasn't even started yet.Copy !req
298. We can sit in here and sulk in the dark,
or we can crawl our asses out into the sunCopy !req
299. and sell some fucking tires, huh?Copy !req
300. We can turn
this whole fucking thing around!Copy !req
301. Will's gonna go out there
and save this fucking shop!Copy !req
302. I get to keep my job,Copy !req
303. and I am gonna have
a couple brewskis at work sometimes.Copy !req
304. And you can't stop it!Copy !req
305. You wanna know why?
Because this is the United State!Copy !req
306. What?Copy !req
307. We're doing the tires for you,
but when we took the wheels off,Copy !req
308. the one thing we noticed is
the brake pads are a little low.Copy !req
309. It's probably a good idea
if we just take care of it now.Copy !req
310. - Let's do it. Okay.
Okay, great.Copy !req
311. - Thank you so much.
- Thank you.Copy !req
312. - I'll get the guys started.
- All right.Copy !req
313. You got this guy to buy four tires,
and I upsold him two different things!Copy !req
314. - Nice!
- Yes!Copy !req
315. So...Copy !req
316. Boy, was that easy,
once he was buying the tires.Copy !req
317. I mean, once the opportunity is there,
you kinda have to take it, right?Copy !req
318. You gotta!Copy !req
319. If the iron is hot,Copy !req
320. you should probably...Copy !req
321. - Strike?
- Right.Copy !req
322. - Yeah.
- 'Cause when else will you be able to?Copy !req
323. It's like this is the only time.
Like, right now.Copy !req
324. Could be the only time.Copy !req
325. Amber! Amber!Copy !req
326. - Oh my God, that's my husband.
- Your husband?Copy !req
327. - What the fuck is this?
- Sir, can I help you?Copy !req
328. Do I look like I need help
from some weird asshole?Copy !req
329. Joseph! Stop it!Copy !req
330. What? You left me with the kids
to go to your mom's.Copy !req
331. Now you're down here
doing bikini stuff with this freak?Copy !req
332. Okay, stop! You don't give a shit about me
unless I'm not around!Copy !req
333. 'Cause I can't use the air fryer
by myself!Copy !req
334. - Whose fault is that?
Do you mind?Copy !req
335. - The fucking kids are hungry!
My fault, I guess, again.Copy !req
336. Dino nuggets are thawing,
getting soggy!Copy !req
337. Get a better job!
Babe, please!Copy !req
338. What was that? What'd you do?Copy !req
339. I didn't do anything!Copy !req
340. Try to fuck that guy's wife?Copy !req
341. Shane! Absolutely not!
I was not trying to have sex with—Copy !req
342. - Fuck that guy's wife.
- I will... I take that back.Copy !req
343. I wasn't trying
to have sex with her. Shane!Copy !req
344. - I did think that there was a little—
- Freeze!Copy !req
345. Psych!Copy !req
346. - Hey, Max. What's up?
Hey, guys.Copy !req
347. I got a call about some guy trying
to lure women into shipping containers.Copy !req
348. - What?
- What?Copy !req
349. When I get a call like that,
I gotta take a look.Copy !req
350. Yeah, you gotta check that out.
That's crazy.Copy !req
351. Unfortunately, also,
and I hate to do this to you guys,Copy !req
352. I gotta shut you down.Copy !req
353. You got open containers.
You don't have any permit.Copy !req
354. I'm getting complaints.Copy !req
355. - You need a permit for tits?
- You need a permit for everything.Copy !req
356. Sorry, forgot to take a picture
of the garage door.Copy !req
357. Bye, everyone.Copy !req
358. - Oh, wait! Lydia!
Oh!Copy !req
359. Stop her, Cal!
- Stop her? Is that legal?Copy !req
360. Cal, block the door!
I can't do that!Copy !req
361. Linger! Linger by the door!Copy !req
362. Lydia, will you just hang on?Copy !req
363. Get out of my way!
- I can't. I gotta look up something.Copy !req
364. Please do not send those photos
to my father. He will lose it!Copy !req
365. As well he should!
Whose incredibly stupid idea was that?Copy !req
366. Mine.Copy !req
367. I'm obsessed with boobs,Copy !req
368. and I'm a big, dumb ogre sometimes.Copy !req
369. Mm, I think you're more complex
than people give you credit for.Copy !req
370. - I'm not. I'm a fucking idiot.
- Watch how you talk about yourself.Copy !req
371. Can see
why the place is going under.Copy !req
372. - Oh yeah?
- Yeah!Copy !req
373. Just fantastically stupid!Copy !req
374. What are you gonna do?
Have a bikini car wash every day?Copy !req
375. Maybe turn the place into a brothel
and change oil while your customers fuck!Copy !req
376. Maybe I'll do that,
and maybe it will be... wildly successfulCopy !req
377. 'cause that's kind of a good idea!Copy !req
378. I know you don't think it's a good idea
'cause you said it that way, but it is!Copy !req
379. You know a lot about success, huh?Copy !req
380. Your little stunt successfully made us
reconsider our initial offer.Copy !req
381. That little car wash was to prove
that upselling off of cheap tiresCopy !req
382. is a good business model.Copy !req
383. - Which it is.
- Which it is!Copy !req
384. So you can take your initial offerCopy !req
385. and shove it up your butt!Copy !req
386. Oh!Copy !req
387. I think I'll wait to hear that
from the real man in charge.Copy !req
388. That's me, baby!
I'm the real man in charge!Copy !req
389. Will!Copy !req
390. Hey, Lydia, do you wanna
do me a little favorCopy !req
391. and maybe just
stick to the front of the store for now?Copy !req
392. She already knows.Copy !req
393. - Fuck!
- Here's... here's what's going on...Copy !req
394. - Oh, "Here's what's going on"?
- Here's what's going on. I'm in charge!Copy !req
395. You're not welcome in my store!
Hit the bricks, bitch!Copy !req
396. Your store?Copy !req
397. Ha!Copy !req
398. While we're here, can we talk about
me still workin' here after?Copy !req
399. I am firing every one of you
fucking blockheads day one!Copy !req
400. And you? Maybe your daddy
will buy an ice cream store,Copy !req
401. and you can work there.Copy !req
402. You can spend the rest of your lifeCopy !req
403. shoveling sprinkles
onto some bratty toddler's soft serve,Copy !req
404. you limp-dick pussy!Copy !req
405. Uh, am I wrong? Is there something
going on between us here?Copy !req
406. No!Copy !req
407. - What? You didn't feel a little—
- God! Out of my way!Copy !req
408. - Yep.
- Would you hold on?Copy !req
409. It was just a heat-of-the-moment thing!Copy !req
410. Can't believe she left you.Copy !req
411. It's all right.
We'll get 'em next time, bud.Copy !req
412. Hey.
- I have mace!Copy !req
413. Oh!Copy !req
414. Hi.Copy !req
415. Yeah. I came out here to get in my car.Copy !req
416. And then I rememberedCopy !req
417. I don't have a car.Copy !req
418. I backed into a Hair Cuttery a month ago,Copy !req
419. so the state says
I should ride the bus for a while.Copy !req
420. Well,Copy !req
421. the bus can be fun.Copy !req
422. No.Copy !req
423. You know what could be fun...Copy !req