1. Kilah, I'm gonna need you
to start smoking out back from now on.Copy !req
2. - We're getting a lot of complaints.
- From who?Copy !req
3. I don't wanna say from who.
I just need you to start smoking out back.Copy !req
4. It was the wheelchair lady, wasn't it?Copy !req
5. Great. Mystery solved.Copy !req
6. Fucking rat.Copy !req
7. - I knew it.
- Then why'd you blow it in her face?Copy !req
8. - Hello!
Hi.Copy !req
9. Um, is it possible for me
to get an oil change here today?Copy !req
10. We can do an oil change today.Copy !req
11. Okay, great.Copy !req
12. Um, and if I can be a bit of a pain,Copy !req
13. um, if it could be done in an hour,
two hours max.Copy !req
14. I'm... I'm prepping for an interview.
I really need to get back.Copy !req
15. - That's not a pain at all.
- Thank God.Copy !req
16. People are like,Copy !req
17. "I need my oil change right now,
or I'll ruin your life." So...Copy !req
18. I don't wanna do that.
I promise. No.Copy !req
19. Um...Copy !req
20. I'm Desiree.Copy !req
21. I'm Will.Copy !req
22. Oh, I meant for the order.Copy !req
23. - Oh, yes. Um...
Okay.Copy !req
24. - Terrific. I'll put that in.
- Okay.Copy !req
25. And I'll still be Will,
and then you can grab a seat over there.Copy !req
26. Give me your keys,
and I'll get the guys right on it.Copy !req
27. Hey, welcome
to Valley Forge Auto...Copy !req
28. where we take care of our customers.Copy !req
29. Oh, Will, I'm gonna fuckin' bust!Copy !req
30. Oh, Will!Copy !req
31. Uh, fuck!Copy !req
32. I do apologize about that,
but it could've been ten times worse.Copy !req
33. So, you know, sorry, Desiree,
but I'll get the guys on it,Copy !req
34. then we'll get cooking. Shane!Copy !req
35. Okay, Arnold,
this lady needs an oil change.Copy !req
36. Mexican lady.
Tell her it's gonna be a while. I'm busy.Copy !req
37. First of all, I don't think she's Mexican.Copy !req
38. Second, it's irrelevant.Copy !req
39. I can tell you if she's Mexican.
I can tell anybody's race by their car.Copy !req
40. No, you can't. And that's a little racist.Copy !req
41. It's not. Anybody can do it.
You could do it.Copy !req
42. No, I couldn't.Copy !req
43. Black Nissan. Tinted windows. Cherry bomb.Copy !req
44. - I don't know what that would be!
- Pack of menthols... in any car.Copy !req
45. I don't know what that would be.
That could be anybody.Copy !req
46. Arnold, Chrysler 300.Copy !req
47. Never mind. He's gonna say it for real.Copy !req
48. All right.
Arnold, she needs this car in an hour.Copy !req
49. Well then, tell her to take the bus
like the rest of 'em.Copy !req
50. Damn, Arnold.Copy !req
51. Arnold, this is a warning.Copy !req
52. You know, I work for your dad, not you.Copy !req
53. I was here when you were back
in high school going to flute camp.Copy !req
54. I did not go to flute camp.Copy !req
55. All right, I don't remember
exactly what it was,Copy !req
56. but I do remember it was gay.Copy !req
57. You will have this car done in one hour.Copy !req
58. Oh, we'll see.Copy !req
59. I wouldn't want you
to have to call your daddy.Copy !req
60. Shane, your friend George is here.Copy !req
61. - Shut the fuck up! Shane!
- George! What up, dude?Copy !req
62. You still work here?Copy !req
63. - This fucking place?
- Yeah.Copy !req
64. That's hilarious. Come on.Copy !req
65. Yeah. It's fucking funny.
What's going on with you? How are you?Copy !req
66. I'm an entrepreneur.
I, uh... I started my own company, so...Copy !req
67. That's cool.
- It's going well.Copy !req
68. You still look jacked.
Thank you.Copy !req
69. You know, I'm up at 4:30 every day.
Kettlebells are not gonna lift themselves.Copy !req
70. We start with that, then it's on to cryo,Copy !req
71. then a little ice bath,
breath work, grounding,Copy !req
72. and then treadmill incline
about probably 15,Copy !req
73. but I have two bricks under the front,
so it's actually higher.Copy !req
74. You know, I've just found that
what I do athletically and aerobicallyCopy !req
75. has translated monetarily.
I'm doing well financially, so...Copy !req
76. Yeah? That's fucking...Copy !req
77. What do you do?
You were such a good athlete.Copy !req
78. I was... Yeah, I was...
Uh, well, I've been working.Copy !req
79. I've been doin', uh,
all types of shit, really.Copy !req
80. Yeah.
- Fucking...Copy !req
81. Like, lifting or...Copy !req
82. Yeah, I lift.Copy !req
83. You do?Copy !req
84. I remember in high school,
you used to shoulder press, like, 170.Copy !req
85. 170. I can still. I can.Copy !req
86. You can do 170 still?
- Still got it. Yeah.Copy !req
87. - That guy's about 170.
Get over here!Copy !req
88. - Come here, dude.
- Get over here.Copy !req
89. - I'm gonna put you over my head.
No!Copy !req
90. Come here!
You goose!Copy !req
91. Come here, fucking loser.
- Absolutely not! Absolutely...Copy !req
92. Chill out, dude.
Chill out?Copy !req
93. Chill out, ass man. Shane!Copy !req
94. Where'd you hear that?Copy !req
95. Who's this guy? This is a piece of ass.Copy !req
96. - This is my boy George.
- Hey. Dave.Copy !req
97. We played football together
in high school.Copy !req
98. You guys are the same age?Copy !req
99. I guess if I kind of saw Shane alone
and then...Copy !req
100. Even still, though.Copy !req
101. - Look. Holy fuck.
I stay flexed.Copy !req
102. - I've been hitting shrugs. Feel that?
- You're jacked, bro. Awesome.Copy !req
103. Pull it back. Let him see it.Copy !req
104. - The frame is good. A lot of potential.
That's awesome.Copy !req
105. I'd love to chat. I really
would love to chat for a long time, but...Copy !req
106. Me and Will
got some stuff to attend to,Copy !req
107. so, Willie,
let's hit the principal's office.Copy !req
108. Okay, my office? Sure.Copy !req
109. We'll go to the office.
Yeah, to my office.Copy !req
110. It's good to see you.Copy !req
111. I'm proud of you.Copy !req
112. - Yeah, it's good to see you.
- Still here. Still at it.Copy !req
113. Hmm.Copy !req
114. Are you happy?Copy !req
115. No.Copy !req
116. Finally!Copy !req
117. - God. It's a fucking mess in there.
- Wait, what? What's happening?Copy !req
118. I don't know. Dave's here, and that dude
who talks about exercise and protein.Copy !req
119. Why can't we have one day
that's just work?Copy !req
120. Goddamn it.Copy !req
121. Hi, Miles.Copy !req
122. Fucking kids, man.
Nobody's fucking working.Copy !req
123. I got five college kids in there.
Know what they're doing?Copy !req
124. - Tugging dick.
- That's what they do.Copy !req
125. Guess what Miles is doing?Copy !req
126. Dragging a sack of shit.Copy !req
127. I freak out on them, I'm the bad guy.Copy !req
128. I say it's a bistro.
They say it's a hoagie shop!Copy !req
129. And it is!Copy !req
130. - I can't deal with this.
- I yell at one kid, and the cops show up?Copy !req
131. - Yeah, I'm coming with you.
Oh! Sorry!Copy !req
132. Jesus!Copy !req
133. Now I'm taking out the trash,
not doing what I'm supposed to be doing!Copy !req
134. - Thanks, Miles.
Yeah.Copy !req
135. - Have a good one.
Now I'm taking out the trash!Copy !req
136. You don't fuck me! I fuck you!Copy !req
137. - Yo, who is she?
- Oh, that's my wife.Copy !req
138. She's hot as fuck, dude.Copy !req
139. Polynesian.Copy !req
140. They don't age.Copy !req
141. - What the fuck is Polynesian?
- Like The Rock. You see this?Copy !req
142. - Yeah.
- Infiniti.Copy !req
143. - It's nice.
- It's more comfortable than the Porsche.Copy !req
144. - That's an expensive fucking car, dude.
- To some.Copy !req
145. - Yeah?
- Yeah, but not for me.Copy !req
146. I make 200,000 US dollars per year.Copy !req
147. You make 200,000 a year?Copy !req
148. - That's right.
- Doing what?Copy !req
149. Windows.Copy !req
150. - You wa— You washing windows?
- No, no. Selling them.Copy !req
151. You sell windows and make that much money?Copy !req
152. That's right.Copy !req
153. I could see a spot for you at my company.Copy !req
154. - Yeah?
- It'd give me a lot of pleasure.Copy !req
155. I've worked here ten years.
I've never thought about these windows.Copy !req
156. I've never seen these.Copy !req
157. God damn.Copy !req
158. Will, I gotta tell you.Copy !req
159. These numbers are dog shit, pal.Copy !req
160. I gotta send one of your guys
to the Belmont shop.Copy !req
161. - Did my dad approve that?
I approved it.Copy !req
162. You don't need three mechanics here.Copy !req
163. You barely got enough work for one,
for Chrissake.Copy !req
164. Well, for... for now! For now!Copy !req
165. But I've got some marketing ideas
that I think are gonna boost car count.Copy !req
166. And so, you know,
I wanted to talk to you about that.Copy !req
167. Okay, Arnold.Copy !req
168. Send Arnold.Copy !req
169. No, I'm not sending Arnold.
He's slow as shit.Copy !req
170. Right, send Arnold to Belmont,Copy !req
171. or take him out back
and shoot him in the head. I don't care.Copy !req
172. No, I need somebody good.Copy !req
173. I'm thinking Shane, probably.Copy !req
174. Well...Copy !req
175. Yeah, Sh... Shane... Shane's, uh...Copy !req
176. Shane's... Shane's not that good.Copy !req
177. Uh, if... if... if you're looking
to send somebody good,Copy !req
178. he's not your guy.Copy !req
179. What's going on with Shane?Copy !req
180. General laziness, I suppose,Copy !req
181. and, uh, he doesn't really,Copy !req
182. uh, recommend a lot of work to upsell.Copy !req
183. That's... He doesn't do that.Copy !req
184. Really?Copy !req
185. Guess I'm gonna have to have
a talk with Shane.Copy !req
186. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I'll, uh...Copy !req
187. I'll take care of it.Copy !req
188. Constantly late, lazy when you get here,
not recommending any work.Copy !req
189. Will told you that?Copy !req
190. Yeah, and I gotta be honest,
I'm not too happy with you, pal.Copy !req
191. Did Will tell you
he hasn't sold shit in two months?Copy !req
192. I'm not going to Belmont.Copy !req
193. Come on, dude!Copy !req
194. Look, I'm throwing you
five extra bucks an hour.Copy !req
195. That brings you to 32.50!Copy !req
196. Oh my God.Copy !req
197. You're living like
a white trash sultan on that.Copy !req
198. Come on. It's a good deal, Shane. Take it.Copy !req
199. I'll think about it.Copy !req
200. No, I'll think about it.Copy !req
201. Fucking think about it.
I'll fucking think about it.Copy !req
202. I'm gonna think about it, so, you know,
it's... it's not on the table forever.Copy !req
203. Will!Copy !req
204. Oh fuck.
- Oh, that's great! That's great.Copy !req
205. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck you!Copy !req
206. Fuck.Copy !req
207. Will, what the fuck, man?
I just talked to the guys.Copy !req
208. - They're saying you're not selling shit.
- Well, they're wrong.Copy !req
209. Really? When's the last time
you upsold anything?Copy !req
210. I don't have a, you know,
exact date, but—Copy !req
211. Okay. How about this?Copy !req
212. Right there. See that?Copy !req
213. There's a lady
getting four tires replaced.Copy !req
214. She needs brakes.
Go sell her the brakes, Will.Copy !req
215. Okay. And who is this?Copy !req
216. Who? There's two fucking customers
in there.Copy !req
217. - You can't keep track of two customers?
- No, I just need a second to rehearse.Copy !req
218. - I'll do it. Watch—
- Dave!Copy !req
219. Don't eat those. I'm coming back for them.Copy !req
220. You actually make $40,000 a year?Copy !req
221. Yeah.Copy !req
222. Come work for me.Copy !req
223. I want you at George Blaine Window Panes.Copy !req
224. I can give you so much more.Copy !req
225. So I'd be Shane
from George Blaine's Window Panes?Copy !req
226. It's got a nice ring to it.Copy !req
227. I gotta get out of here.
This is uncomfortable for me.Copy !req
228. Hi, ma'am. Hi, I'm Dave.Copy !req
229. I'm the district manager
here at Valley Forge.Copy !req
230. I just wanted to take time out of my dayCopy !req
231. to thank you
for being such a valued customer.Copy !req
232. And, uh, I was looking at your car.Copy !req
233. It looks like you're gonna need
a new set of brakes.Copy !req
234. No one wants to hear that,Copy !req
235. but we are running
our district manager special.Copy !req
236. Uh, for 200 bucks,Copy !req
237. we can get you those brakes
on top of the tires,Copy !req
238. and you'll be out of here
with a brand-new car, essentially,Copy !req
239. within a couple hours.Copy !req
240. Can we sign you up?Copy !req
241. No, I don't think so.Copy !req
242. Really?Copy !req
243. - Uh, ma'am...
- I know what you did.Copy !req
244. What?Copy !req
245. Ma'am. Sorry, I just... I'd feel so bad...Copy !req
246. I know what you did. I'm on your ass.Copy !req
247. I'm gonna knock $50 off. What do you say...Copy !req
248. - What are you talking about?
- Oh yeah!Copy !req
249. Sorry, ma'am.Copy !req
250. - Truly—
- I said no.Copy !req
251. Great.Copy !req
252. Really great.Copy !req
253. Oh, yes!Copy !req
254. Finally.Copy !req
255. Un-fucking-real!Copy !req
256. - Oh. Hey, Kilah.Copy !req
257. - Get this. These fucking kids...
- Gotta go! Sorry!Copy !req
258. Hey!Copy !req
259. Way to go, shit lips!
You just ruined that fucking sale for me!Copy !req
260. Uh, listen. I gotta tell you, I disagree.
You didn't have that sale.Copy !req
261. Didn't have the sale?Copy !req
262. Did you hear what I said
about the district manager special?Copy !req
263. I just made that shit up.Copy !req
264. She was eating out of
the palm of my fucking hand,Copy !req
265. and you blew it!Copy !req
266. What the fuck
do you even do around here, Will?Copy !req
267. And then you do this...Copy !req
268. Yo!Copy !req
269. - It's not too bad!
- That was actually fucking good.Copy !req
270. No answer. Of course.Copy !req
271. Look, I need to see
Shane's performance review right now.Copy !req
272. Um...Copy !req
273. The performance review. That... that...Copy !req
274. There is a file, uh...Copy !req
275. Wait, wait.Copy !req
276. You don't even have
a performance review for Shane, do you?Copy !req
277. No, I don't have it.Copy !req
278. Well, you know what that means.Copy !req
279. Wait, though.Copy !req
280. I'd prefer not to.Copy !req
281. Okay. So, performance review.Copy !req
282. How do you review your performance
this quarter?Copy !req
283. If I had to review it,
I would say I fucking crushed again.Copy !req
284. How would you review that question
you just asked?Copy !req
285. Me?Copy !req
286. Good! It was a question,
and I asked it. Stop.Copy !req
287. How do you feel about your posture?
You've got a feminine posture.Copy !req
288. Very alert. Scared, like a deer.Copy !req
289. My posture is good.
You've got terrible posture.Copy !req
290. My posture is perfect.
This is an alpha's posture.Copy !req
291. Complete comfortability, total control
of the room, asserting dominance.Copy !req
292. Why are you talking like that?Copy !req
293. - When was the last time you lifted?
- When's the last time you lifted?Copy !req
294. I'm about to start lifting.Copy !req
295. Because of George?
Is he rubbing off on you?Copy !req
296. I don't know what you're impressed about
with George. He's clearly on gear.Copy !req
297. Gear? What the fuck are you talking about?
Have you been googling strong guys again?Copy !req
298. Okay, you know what?Copy !req
299. He shows up late for work
almost every single day.Copy !req
300. Will leaves sometimes.
He left to get a manicure once.Copy !req
301. Okay, it was once. I had a hangnail,
and I was back before lunch.Copy !req
302. He poops in the customers' bathroom.Copy !req
303. - Stop.
I do.Copy !req
304. I take poops sometimes
in the customers' bathroom.Copy !req
305. I take massive man shits.
Will spits when he talks.Copy !req
306. Spit comes out and lands...Copy !req
307. I've seen it land in customers' mouths.Copy !req
308. One lady. One lady!Copy !req
309. One old lady, and she got fucking sick.
She hasn't been back.Copy !req
310. - Because I'm out dealing with customers!
Okay! Okay! All right!Copy !req
311. What are you doing?Copy !req
312. What are you doing?
You told Dave I was fucking around?Copy !req
313. I told him that because
he was gonna send you to Belmont!Copy !req
314. So I said you weren't good at your job
because then he would let you stay here.Copy !req
315. Oh.Copy !req
316. That lady was... sick before she got here.
Will's spit did not kill her.Copy !req
317. Yeah, and Shane,Copy !req
318. he's never late.Copy !req
319. If anybody's late, it's... it's me.Copy !req
320. That was a pretty nice moment, you guys.Copy !req
321. I hate to ruin it, though, 'cause you do
still have to go to fucking Belmont.Copy !req
322. - What?
Yeah.Copy !req
323. I need somebody good there,
and he clearly can't manage you.Copy !req
324. - Dave, come on. What are you doing?
- You start next week.Copy !req
325. Just wrap up
whatever you got going on here.Copy !req
326. All right.Copy !req
327. Dave. Dave, come on.Copy !req
328. George.Copy !req
329. I thought about it.
I think I'm gonna take you up on it.Copy !req
330. I was hoping you'd say that.Copy !req
331. But you... you can't send him.Copy !req
332. - You can't manage the fucking guy.
- No, I can't manage him.Copy !req
333. He's acting out because he has no chance
of making any money here.Copy !req
334. This is gonna be great.
- What do we do?Copy !req
335. All right. Typical day. We're up at 4:30.Copy !req
336. We're in the gym at the facility,
team workout.Copy !req
337. It's mandatory.Copy !req
338. - 4:30?
Yeah.Copy !req
339. That's not when work starts, right?Copy !req
340. Work doesn't stop.Copy !req
341. Why doesn't he have fucking cars to fix?Copy !req
342. 'Cause you're not selling dick.Copy !req
343. You're like a mama dog,
and you got puppies,Copy !req
344. and Shane's a little puppy,
and he needs sustenance,Copy !req
345. but your titties are all dried up!Copy !req
346. Let him go suck some titties at Belmont.
Don't let him starve here.Copy !req
347. No. I can't...Copy !req
348. I don't really follow
the sexual imagery of that, but—Copy !req
349. It was maternal. It was not sexual.Copy !req
350. That, for real, sounds like shit.Copy !req
351. But $200,000.
I'll do whatever the fuck you want.Copy !req
352. Oh!Copy !req
353. I make 200.Copy !req
354. Yeah, and you said I was gonna make...
Yeah, we'll make 200.Copy !req
355. Well, someday, maybe,Copy !req
356. but to start, it's gonna be 30 an hour.Copy !req
357. - That's the rate.
- Thirty?Copy !req
358. - Yeah. It's you and the illegals.
- You told me I'd make more out there.Copy !req
359. I'm offering way more
by way of a lifestyle.Copy !req
360. You can't send him away.Copy !req
361. Will,Copy !req
362. he's gone, dude.Copy !req
363. Yeah, I...Copy !req
364. - I appreciate the offer. I do.
Yeah, yeah.Copy !req
365. - I like it here. I do like it here.
- No. No!Copy !req
366. - Hi, guys.Copy !req
367. I'm sorry to interrupt,
but I've been here for two hours.Copy !req
368. My car is still out front.
Is this happening today or—Copy !req
369. I'm gonna take care of this right now.Copy !req
370. You wanna move somebody
out of this store? Excuse me, ma'am.Copy !req
371. We're gonna move somebody
out of the store!Copy !req
372. Arnold!Copy !req
373. - I'll think about it.
Yeah.Copy !req
374. Arnold!
- I'll be back.Copy !req
375. - All right. I'm here.
- I told you to work on that lady's car!Copy !req
376. I told you to work on her car!Copy !req
377. And now you're sleeping?Copy !req
378. Well, guess what? I'm in charge now!
It's my shop! Not yours!Copy !req
379. I've been wanting to fire you
for two months, and today's the day!Copy !req
380. You're fired!Copy !req
381. Arnold! You're fired!Copy !req
382. - Whoo!
Wake up!Copy !req
383. Arnold, you're fired.Copy !req
384. Arnold.Copy !req
385. Oh!
Oh my goodness!Copy !req
386. Somebody check to see if he's breathing.Copy !req
387. Check quicker!Copy !req
388. What do you feel?Copy !req
389. He's dead. He's definitely dead.Copy !req
390. Did you fucking kill him?Copy !req
391. Don't say that!
- How hard were you kicking him just now?Copy !req
392. Don't say that!
That's not funny to joke about!Copy !req
393. - Was this some lovers' quarrel?
- Are you crazy?Copy !req
394. - We all heard you screaming at him.
- He's probably been dead since lunch.Copy !req
395. I don't think you're an asshole,Copy !req
396. but it's getting harder
to defend you every day.Copy !req
397. Could you please hand me that work order?Copy !req
398. This is why people think
you're a dickhead.Copy !req
399. Doing silent treatment today?
I would fucking love that.Copy !req
400. Fuck you.Copy !req
401. My bad.
I shouldn't be fucking acting like that.Copy !req
402. We gotta get our story straight
before the cops show up.Copy !req
403. What story is there to get straight?
Are you kidding?Copy !req
404. You were kicking him,
and now he's dead.Copy !req
405. Oh shit. That's just...Copy !req
406. 911, what's your emergency?
- Yeah, uh...Copy !req
407. - Somebody's dead.
- And what address are you at, sir?Copy !req
408. Nobody killed him.Copy !req
409. - Sir?
- Nobody killed him.Copy !req
410. He got kicked a little.
- Someone's dead. He got kicked a bit.Copy !req
411. They were lovers.
Oh my God!Copy !req
412. All right, Will.
Looks like Shane's staying here after all.Copy !req
413. - I thought I had it.
- No.Copy !req
414. You wanna die like that guy? Here?Copy !req
415. Arnold died like a man, dude.
That's how a man dies.Copy !req
416. Fucking do what you hate every day,
and then you just die under a car.Copy !req
417. I was wondering if we could go over how
you're planning on framing this to my dad.Copy !req
418. A man died on your watch.
It doesn't matter.Copy !req
419. Do you want a legacy?Copy !req
420. Dude, what the fuck is your legacy
gonna be? "He fucking ran far."Copy !req
421. My story is still being written.
Some people.Copy !req
422. Different strokes, I guess, you know?Copy !req
423. Yeah.Copy !req
424. Is that enchilada place any good
down the street?Copy !req
425. Uh, I've heard that some people eat there
and that they like it, but I...Copy !req
426. Nice.Copy !req
427. Okay.Copy !req
428. We really can't apologize enough, folks.Copy !req
429. A tragedy still, though.Copy !req
430. I think we can all agree it was a tragedy,
and just see Kilah over at the front desk.Copy !req
431. She will email you a 5% off coupon,
good at any time unless...Copy !req