1. >> Both: OOOOOOOH!
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2. >> Both: THANK YOU, O POWERFUL
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3. SUSAN, FOR THE GIFT OF THE
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4. FEMININE SPIRIT.
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5. WE FOLLOW YOU BLINDLY TO THE
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6. GREAT "VAGONOUS."
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7. WE PRAISE YOU, SUSAN.
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8. HELLO.
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9. >> AND WELCOME TO
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10. "FEMININE PERSPECTIVES," THE
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11. TALK SHOW FROM THE WOMAN'S
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12. PERSPECTIVE.
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13. TODAY ON OUR SHOW, WE HAVE TWO
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14. OFFICIAL HOLLYWOOD STUNTMEN.
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15. >> MY NAME IS RANDY STONTMEHN,
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16. AND THIS IS MY BROTHER, GENE.
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17. >> AND YOU DO STUNT-DOUBLE WORK,
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18. TOO?
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19. >> WHO'S THAT?
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20. I CAN'T TELL THEM APART.
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21. >>
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22. >> OH, SO, WHAT IS BEING A
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23. STUNTMAN LIKE?
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24. >> SHOULD I ANSWER?
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25. >> YEAH, YOU GO FIRST.
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26. >> NO, YOU START, AND I'LL
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27. INTERRUPT.
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28. >> OKAY. WE'RE THE STUNT—
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29. >> ACTUALLY, WE ENJOY IT.
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30. >> OH.
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31. >> IT'S CRAZY.
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32. I GO OUT, DO A BUNCH OF
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33. WRESTLING AND HURT MYSELF, AND
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34. HIM.
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35. I'LL GET HIM RIGHT DOWN HERE.
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36. HEY!
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37. >> OH!
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38. WE DO A LOT OF KARATE AND SOME
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39. KUNG FU MOVES.
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40. >> WHAT ACTORS DO YOU GUYS PLAY?
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41. HAVE WE SEEN YOU IN MOVIES
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42. BEFORE?
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43. >> I'VE PLAYED KEL C. GRAMMARE,
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44. DON BUON JIOVIE.
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45. >> CRAIG "TEA" NELSON,
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46. JUT HURSH, JHUD NALSON.
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47. >> KEITHER SULLIVAN.
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48. >> BIHL COSBI.
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49. >> YOU REMEMBER "SCAN MAN" FROM
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50. "TURKEY'S" ONE — LITTLE CHINESE
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51. GUY?
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52. >> DELLE TABURK, JAY MAWHINNEY.
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53. >> HOSTA MAHOGEY, WHICH WAS A
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54. VERY DANGEROUS SHOOT.
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55. >> WHEN WE COME BACK, THEY'RE
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56. GONNA DO SOME STUNTS RIGHT HERE
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57. IN THE STUDIO AND SHOW US HOW
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58. THIS MAGIC WORKS.
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59. >> TOPLESS.
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60. >> I HOPE.
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61. >> AH!
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62. >>
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63. >> I-I-I-I-I'M
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64. STEVE MAHANAHAN, OWNER/OPERATOR
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65. OF STEVE MAHANAHAN'S CHILD CLOWN
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66. OUTLET.
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67. I'M GOING TO JA-A-A-A-A-IL!
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68. WE'RE GOIN' OUT OF BUSINESS!
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69. TIME TO CLOSE UP SHOP.
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70. I TOUCHED A CLOWN.
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71. NOW I'M GOING TO JAIL.
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72. I T-T-T-T-TOUCHED —
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73. I T-T-T-T—
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74. TOUCHED A CLOWN.
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75. NOW I'M GOING TO JAIL.
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76. I-I-I-I-I-I GOT TO GET RID OF MY
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77. C-C-CLOWNS!
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78. WE'RE HAVING A "GOING OUT OF
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79. BUSINESS" CLO-O-O-O-WN SALE.
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80. OW!
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81. OH!
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82. IT'S A CLOWN STARE!
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83. MY FATHER FORCED ME INTO THIS
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84. CHILD-CLOWN BUSINESS!
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85. I HATE HIM, BUT I LOVE
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86. MY BROTHER.
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87. REST IN PEACE, BOO BOO.
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88. I MISS YOU!
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89. REST IN PEACE, BOO BOO BOO BOO.
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90. LOOK AT THIS CLOWN. HE'S FUNNY.
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91. HE'S GOT NO ARMS.
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92. I GOT TO GET RID OF THESE
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93. CLO-O-O-O-O-WNS!
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94. I GOT TO GO TO JAIL!
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95. I HOPE THEY LET ME KEEP MY
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96. BE-E-E-E-E-E-E-ARD!
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97. [ SQUISH! SQUISH! SQUISH!
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98. SQUISH! SQUISH! SQUISH! ]
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99. >> Dr. I WISH
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100. I COULD HAVE "TELE-PATHY."
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101. THEN I CAN THINK ABOUT A FOOD
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102. AND IT WOULD F-FLY AND APPEAR.
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103. WHAT IF I COULD FLOAT RIGHT OVER
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104. THE HEADS OF ALL THE BULLIES?
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105. SAY, "NAH NAH!"
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106. HOW COME I CAN'T HAVE THAT?
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107. FOR YOUR HEALTH.
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108. >> WELL, GUYS, YOU'VE GOT
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109. SOMETHING IN STORE FOR US?
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110. ARE YOU GONNA SHOW US ONE OF
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111. YOUR STUNTS?
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112. >> THAT'S RIGHT, LADIES.
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113. WE'RE PREPARED TO SHOW YOU GUYS
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114. A CLASSIC FIGHT SCENE.
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115. >> LET'S DO IT.
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116. >> GUYS, IF YOU NEED TO TAKE
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117. YOUR SHIRTS OFF, IT'S FINE.
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118. >> I HOPE SO.
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119. >> OKAY, FOLKS, WE'D LIKE TO DO
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120. TURKEY'S CRUST."
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121. HEY, I DON'T
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122. LIKE THE LOOK OF YOU.
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123. I DON'T HAVE A
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124. SCRIPT.
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125. >> WHO DO
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126. YOU THINK YOU ARE — THE SHERIFF
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127. OF THIS TOWN?
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128. HA HA HA HA.
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129. >> NOW, WHO'S WHO OVER THERE —
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130. RANDY OR GENE?
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131. >> I DON'T KNOW.
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132. >> THAT'S GOOD STUNT WORK, GUYS.
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133. >> I'LL TELL YOU WHAT — THIS
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134. LOOKS PRETTY REAL.
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135. >> PSHH!
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136. >> ROY, YOU DON'T NEED TO CALL
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137. THE AMBULANCE.
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138. IT'S JUST A GAG.
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139. >> I ALSO LIKE TO USE MY ELBOW
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140. SOMETIMES FOR THAT REAL KNOCKOUT
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141. PUNCH.
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142. WATCH CLOSELY.
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143. I'M NOT EVEN TOUCHING HIM.
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144. PSHH!
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145. >> Aaaaaaaaaah!
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146. Aaah! Aah!
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147. Ungh. Ungh.
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148. >> NOW, DON'T GET TOO HURT OUT
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149. THERE, 'CAUSE WE WANT TO HAVE
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150. YOU GUYS FOR DESSERT.
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151. >> NOW, THIS IS ONE OF MY GREAT
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152. TRICKS THAT I USE.
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153. YOU TAKE THIS GREEN MASK HERE.
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154. >> HO-HO!
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155. >> TIGHTEN THIS UP GOOD.
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156. >> YOU READY, RANDY?
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157. >> ALL RIGHT.
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158. DON'T PULL ANY PUNCHES, NOW.
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159. >> HERE IT COMES.
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160. >> OOH.
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161. >> AAH!
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162. >> NOW LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENS
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163. WHEN OUR POSTPRODUCTION GUYS
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164. GET AHOLD OF IT.
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165. >> ALL RIGHT, ROY, TAKE A LOOK.
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166. >> WHOA.
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167. >> IT ACTUALLY LOOKED REAL.
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168. >> GREAT.
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169. >> GOOD.
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170. >> ARGH!
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171. >> CAREFUL, BOYS.
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172. >> OOOH!
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173. >> OOH!
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174. >> OH!
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175. >> THAT'S HOW —
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176. THAT'S HOW STUNTS ARE DONE.
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177. >> WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'LL SEE
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178. THOSE STUNT BROTHERS DO SOME GUN
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179. TRICKS.
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180. >> OOH, A REAL GUN?
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181. >> OH, THIS IS A SNACK?
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182. >> YEAH.
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183. >> MMM. VERY GOOD, GUYS.
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184. I THOUGHT THERE WAS GONNA BE
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185. SOME PIZZA OR SOMETHING TODAY.
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186. LATER?
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187. >> NAH.
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188. >> I JUST REALIZED THERE IS NO
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189. MASTER PLAN.
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190. IT'S ALL A BUNCH OF
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191. NOW, DUDE, I WORKED ON "M.A.S.H"
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192. FOR NINE YEARS.
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193. >> I RIGGED "M.A.S.H."
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194. >> ELLIOTT GOULD'S A VERY, VERY
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195. GOOD FRIEND OF MINE.
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196. >>
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197. >> AND, UH, THANKS FOR JOINING
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198. US ON "ALL DOLLED UP."
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199. WE'LL SEE YOU ANOTHER TIME.
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200. >> H-H-H-H-H-H-HEY!
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201. COME ON DOWN TO
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202. DONALD MAHANAHAN'S ORIGINAL
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203. CHILD CLOWN OUTLET!
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204. I'M THE ORIGINAL CHILD CLOWN
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205. OUT—
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206. CLOWN OUT—
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207. CLOWN OUT—
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208. CLOWN
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209. OUTLE-E-E-E-T!
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210. YOU KNOW YOU'RE GONNA LOVE MY
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211. CLOWNS.
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212. COME ON! I BRED 'EM MYSELF!
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213. THESE CLOWNS COME FROM DONNIE'S
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214. SE-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-D!
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215. WHY TRY SOME OTHER MAN'S SEED?
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216. MY SEED'S FRE-E-E-E—
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217. FRESH!
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218. I KEEP MY SEED IN TUBES AND
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219. PLASTIC BAGS.
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220. PUT IT IN YOUR WIFE, YOU'LL GET
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221. A CLOWN IN NINE MONTHS.
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222. THE WOMEN I BREED WITH ARE CLEAN
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223. AND HAVE REAL CLOWN TRAITS.
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224. LOOK, I'M A CLOWN BREEDER.
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225. IT'S IN MY BLOOD.
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226. IT'S IN MY BALLS.
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227. LET'S GET SOMETHING STRAIGHT.
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228. IT'S NOT MY FAULT MY SON TOUCHED
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229. THOSE CLOWNS.
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230. HE BROKE THE GOLDEN RULE —
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231. NEVER TOUCH THE CLOWNS.
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232. YOU.
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233. HEY!
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234. HEY, NOT NOW!
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235. DONNIE SAYS "NO!"
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236. HE SHOULD HAVE USED THE STICK
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237. TOOL.
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238. I TOLD HIM. DID HE LISTEN?
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239. HEY, THAT'S FOR A JURY TO
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240. DECIDE.
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241. MY OTHER SON, MIKE, GOT SHOT IN
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242. THE FACE.
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243. SO COME TO ME. ME — DONNIE!
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244. HEY! FOR THE LAST TIME! QUIET!
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245. I-I-I-I-I-I-I'M GONNA HAVE TO
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246. PUT THEM IN CAGES THEY CAN'T SEE
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247. THROUGH.
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248. HEY, THIS IS GABRIEL.
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249. HEY, I MADE HIM. HE'S FRESH.
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250. >>
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251. >> OH, NOT A GOOD TIME RIGHT
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252. NOW.
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253. I'M GONNA HAVE TO BURY HIM IN
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254. THE BACK IF HE KEEPS ACTING LIKE
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255. THIS.
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256. HE-E-E-E-E-Y!
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257. I'M THE ORIGINAL CHILD CLOWN
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258. MAN!
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259. RENT FROM THE BE-E-E-E-ST!
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260. >> WELL, THANKS FOR STAYING
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261. WITH US.
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262. RIGHT NOW WE'RE GONNA HAVE —
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263. THE STUNT BROTHERS ARE GONNA
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264. SHOW US A VERY EXCITING REAL
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265. GUN TRICK.
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266. SO LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
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267. >> THAT'S RIGHT.
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268. WE'RE GONNA SHOW YOU GUYS ONE OF
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269. THE OLDEST TRICKS IN MOVIES, AND
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270. THAT'S THE "EXPLODING PUMPKIN."
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271. >> THE EXPLODING PUMPKIN IS
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272. POSSIBLY THE COOLEST TRICK IN
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273. ANY ACTION FILM, AND WE'RE GONNA
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274. DEMONSTRATE IT RIGHT NOW.
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275. I'M GONNA BALANCE THIS REAL
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276. PUMPKIN ON MY HEAD.
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277. >> IF I'M JUST A TOUCH OFF, MY
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278. BROTHER GENE'S A GONER.
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279. OH. SWEATY.
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280. >> CAREFUL, BUDDY.
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281. >> OOH, I DON'T WANT TO SEE
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282. A DEATH TODAY.
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283. >> I'M NOT MUCH OF A MARKSMAN.
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284. >> JUST MAKE SURE YOU GET A GOOD
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285. LINE ON IT, BUDDY.
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286. >> WELL, YOU DON'T MOVE.
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287. THAT'S THE KEY.
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288. >> I'M HOLDING STILL.
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289. >> NO, NO, NO, NO.
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290. Careful, careful, careful,
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291. careful, careful.
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292. >> THE REASON I'M SO NERVOUS IS
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293. THAT THESE ARE LIVE ROUNDS, AND
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294. YOU CAN'T BE TOO CAREFUL WITH —
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295. AAH!
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296. >> AAH!
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297. >> OOH!
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298. >> WHAT HAPPENED?
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299. >> EVERYONE OKAY?
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300. >> THIS IS A HOT GUN!
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301. >> MARSH, YOU ALL RIGHT?
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302. >> DID THAT GUN REALLY GO OFF?
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303. >> GENE?
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304. >> LOOK AT THIS HAIRPIN TRIGGER
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305. HERE.
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306. [ GUNSHOTS, METAL CLANGING,
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307. GLASS SHATTERING ]
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308. >> YEAH, THERE'S LIVE ROUNDS IN
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309. THERE.
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310. >>
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311. >> THERE'S LIVE ROUNDS IN THERE!
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312. >> OOH!
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313. >> OH!
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314. >> MARSH?
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315. >> OH! OH!
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316. >> OH, GOD.
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317. COME ON, MARSH.
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318. >> SOMEBODY GET HELP!
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319. >> SOMEBODY GET HELP NOW!
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320. WHY ARE YOU ALL JUST STANDING
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321. HERE?
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322. GET HELP!
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323. >> WOULD YOU GET HELP?
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324. SOMEBODY CALL HELP.
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325. CALL 911. I DON'T KNOW.
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326. >> SHE'S NOT BREATHING!
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327. >> CALL HELP. GET HELP.
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328. >> OH, MY GOD.
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329. THERE'S A LOT OF BLOOD HERE!
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330. >> SHUT THE CAMERA OFF
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331. NOW AND GET HELP.
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332. GET HELP.
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333. >> SHE'S NOT BREATHING!
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334. >> WHAT THE ARE YOU
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335. DOING?
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336. GET HELP.
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337. >> THIS WAS ON THE BACK OF HER
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338. HEAD.
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