Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! 4x5

Directed by

Fred Willard as Mancierge • Tommy Wiseau as Self • Victor Chi as Paul's Colleague

Tim and Eric hire Tommy Wiseau to direct a "Pig Man" sketch for them. Features clips from The Room. Cinco introduces the Mancierge service.

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!req Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! 4x5 [02:32]
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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. SO, FOR TONIGHT'S EPISODE WE'RE TRYING SOMETHING

2. THAT WE'VE NEVER TRIED BEFORE.

3. WE'RE BRINGING IN A SPECIAL GUEST DIRECTOR TO DIRECT A

4. SKETCH.

5. HIS NAME IS TOMMY WISEAU, AND HE DIRECTED

6. ONE OF OUR FAVORITE FILMS, CALLED "THE ROOM."

7. I NEVER HIT YOU.

8. YOU ARE TEARING ME APART, LISA!

9. WHY ARE YOU SO HYSTERICAL?

10. DO YOU UNDERSTAND LIFE?

11. DO YOU?

12. I HAVE BEEN WORKING ON A CHARACTER CALLED THE PIG MAN.

13. PIG MAN SEES HIS FRIEND EATING SOME FOOD, AND THEN HE MAKES

14. THESE HILARIOUS PIG NOISES.

15. IT'S JUST A GREAT

16. CHARACTER.

17. IT'S A LOT OF FUN TO PERFORM.

18. GREAT JOB! WOW!

19. IT'S REALLY GREAT JOB.

20. [ MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ] ♪ I LIKE VACUUMS, TOADS,

21. AND A TIGHT-FITTING SHIRT ♪ ♪ I LIKE CORKBOARD, PIZZA,

22. AND CUTS THAT HURT ♪ ♪ I LIKE REVERSE DILDOS

23. AND MEAT WITH FAT ♪ ♪ I LIKE BUNIONS ON MY FEET

24. COME IN!

25. HEY, TIM.

26. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

27. JUST HAVING A SNACK, EATING SOME PRETZELS, READING A

28. BOOK.

29. OH. PIG MAN.

30. GUYS, GUYS, GUYS, THIS IS ALL WRONG.

31. I WAS THINKING IF I CAME AROUND AND GAVE YOU A QUICK

32. WINK, THAT WOULD —

33. JUST A COUPLE YEARS WE'VE BEEN DOING IT.

34. COUPLE YEARS? OH, MY GOD.

35. ARE YOU FROM HOLLYWOOD?

36. NO, I JUST MOVED OUT HERE.

37. YEAH, THAT'S OBVIOUS.

38. OKAY, I HAVE AN IDEA.

39. I WILL PLAY A PIG MAN, AND JESSICA ALBA WILL PLAY TIM.

40. I DIDN'T SHOW IT AT THE TIME, BUT, I — MY EYES LIT UP

41. BEHIND MY HEAD, AND I THOUGHT, "JESSICA ALBA — I'M A FAN OF

42. JESSICA ALBA."

43. ERIC, JESSICA ALBA WOULD BE VERY HUGE

44. TO GET ON THE SHOW.

45. I THINK WE SHOULD TRUST OUR DIRECTOR.

46. I REALLY WANTED TO DO PIG MAN WITH YOU AND ME, BUT

47. TOMMY SEEMS — LISTEN, I'M THE DIRECTOR,

48. RIGHT?

49. YES.

50. LET'S TRY IT.

51. OKAY, LET'S TRY IT IN TWO MINUTES.

52. OKAY.

53. CUT.

54. GREAT MEETING, PAUL.

55. MM-HMM.

56. HEY, DO YOU KNOW A PLACE AROUND HERE WHERE I COULD GET A

57. GOOD SLICE OF PIZZA?

58. I'M NOT FROM AROUND HERE.

59. LET ME CHECK WITH MY MANCIERGE.

60. YOUR WHAT?

61. IT'S A NEW DEVICE FROM CINCO.

62. WELL, IT HELPS YOU FIND RESTAURANTS, HOTELS, ANYTHING A

63. MAN MIGHT NEED ON THE ROAD.

64. MANCIERGE.

65. YES, I'M LOOKING FOR A PLACE TO BUY PIZZA FOR A FRIEND OF

66. MINE.

67. HE'S A BUSINESS ASSOCIATE, BUT —

68. A PIECE OF WHAT?

69. NO, PIZZA.

70. PIZZA, YES.

71. WHERE ARE YOU?

72. WE'RE IN DENVER, COLORADO.

73. UH, WOULD YOU BE INTERESTED IN STEAK?

74. UH, YEAH. PREFERABLY PIZZA.

75. OH, GEEZ. I JUST SPILLED...

76. OH, THANKS, JOSH.

77. I JUST SPILLED COFFEE ON MY TROUSERS.

78. HOLD ON A SECOND.

79. I'M TRYING TO HELP YOU — HELLO. WHO AM I TALKING TO?

80. YEAH, ALL RIGHT, I'M — NO, JUST — I'M JUST ASKING.

81. HELLO?

82. AND WHERE ARE YOU?

83. I JUST TOLD YOU.

84. WE'RE IN DENVER, COLO— HOLD ON A SECOND.

85. MANCIERGE.

86. HOW CAN I HELP YOU?

87. HELLO?

88. ALL RIGHT, WOULD YOU HOLD ON?

89. I'M HELPING — WHERE ARE YOU?

90. EVER BEEN IN DENVER?

91. DO YOU KNOW A GOOD PIZZA PLACE?

92. SOME OF THESE MAPS ARE A LITTLE OUTDATED.

93. WHAT TIME'S YOUR FLIGHT?

94. DO YOU HAVE THE CORRECT TIME?

95. WAIT. WHAT? HUH?

96. HI.

97. CAN I HELP YOU?

98. YEAH, CAN I HAVE A DOZEN RED ROSES, PLEASE?

99. OH, HI, JOHNNY.

100. I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS YOU.

101. HERE YOU GO.

102. THAT'S ME.

103. HOW MUCH IS IT?

104. THAT'LL BE $18.

105. HERE YOU GO. KEEP THE CHANGE.

106. HI, DOGGY.

107. YOU'RE MY FAVORITE CUSTOMER.

108. THANKS A LOT. BYE.

109. BYE-BYE.

110. PORK, PORK, PORK, PORK, P-P-P-PORK,

111. PORK, PORK, PORK.

112. PORK, PORK, PORK, PORK.

113. P-P-P-PORK, PORK, PORK, PORK.

114. PORK, PORK, PORK, PORK.

115. PORK.

116. PORK.

117. PORK.

118. PORK.

119. PORK.

120. PIG.

121. PORKIN'.

122. P-P-P-PORK, PORK, PORK.

123. PIG.

124. PORK, PORK, PORK, PORK.

125. P-P-P-PORK.

126. PORK, PORK.

127. MEAT.

128. PORK.

129. I LIKE TO PORK.

130. PORK, P-PORK.

131. POKE.

132. PORK.

133. I WANT TO PORK.

134. PORK, P-PORK.

135. PORK IN MY POOL.

136. PORK, PORK, PORK.

137. PORK IN MY HOUSE.

138. PORK, PORK, PORK.

139. PORK IN MY CAR.

140. P-P-P-PORK.

141. TAKE YOU OUT FOR A

142. FANCY MEAL, THEN WE'LL PORK.

143. SO IT'S THE BIG DAY.

144. WE'RE SHOOTING THE PIG MAN SKETCH.

145. I'M VERY EXCITED.

146. GOT UP WAY TOO EARLY.

147. IT'S LIKE CHRISTMAS MORNING FOR ME.

148. "JESSICA'S IN MAKEUP.

149. WHY DON'T YOU COME MEET HER?" I'M GONNA FINALLY MEET

150. JESS ALBA.

151. HI, JESSICA.

152. TIM, ERIC, JESSICA ALBA.

153. HI.

154. UH, HELLO. HOW ARE YOU?

155. THEY LOVE YOU.

156. HI. J-JESSICA?

157. JESSICA, YES.

158. OKAY. ERIC WAREHEIM.

159. MM-HMM.

160. ARE YOU COMFORTABLE HERE?

161. I AM.

162. GREAT. THAT'S THE IDEA.

163. I'M, UH, BLIND IN — IN MY RIGHT EYE, SO SOMETIMES IT'S

164. HARD FOR ME TO SEE...

165. PEOPLE'S FACES.

166. I TURN TO TIM AND I SAY, "THAT'S NOT THE MOVIE STAR

167. JESSICA ALBA FROM 'FAB FOUR' AND 'GURU.'"

168. SO IT'S STRIKE THREE FOR TOMMY FOR ME.

169. I MEAN, HE REALLY BETRAYED MY TRUST.

170. COME ON, GUYS.

171. LET'S GET OUT FROM HERE.

172. WHO IS THAT?

173. COME ON, GUYS. LET'S GO.

174. THAT'S NOT JESSICA ALBA.

175. YES, IT IS.

176. COME ON. DON'T WHISPER HERE.

177. IF YOU NEED ANYTHING, LET ME KNOW.

178. OTHERWISE, I SEE YOU IN TWO MINUTES, OKAY?

179. OKAY.

180. I LOVED YOU IN "LOVE GURU."

181. THANK YOU.

182. WE'LL SEE YOU IN TWO MINUTES, JESSICA.

183. MM-HMM.

184. COME ON, COME ON.

185. HOLD — HOLD ON JUST A SEC.

186. UH, MANCIERGE.

187. YES. CAN I BE OF SERVICE?

188. YEAH, IT IS A BEAUTIFUL CITY.

189. YEAH.

190. UH, WOULD YOU HAPPEN TO KNOW WHERE A NICE PIZZA RESTAURANT

191. WOULD BE THERE?

192. HOLD ON.

193. ARE YOU ANYWHERE NEAR THE AIRPORT?

194. EXCUSE ME?

195. WILL THEY HAVE TO, UH, BE FLYING SOMEWHERE TO GET ACCESS

196. TO THAT RESTAURANT?

197. HOLD ON.

198. UH, MANCIERGE.

199. OH, HI.

200. HI, DONNY.

201. DADDY'S QUITE BUSY.

202. HELLO?

203. MANCIERGE.

204. NO, I DON'T NEED VASELINE.

205. OH, IS THIS IS YOU AGAIN?

206. NOW, STOP IT!

207. YOU DIDN'T TELL ME EXACTLY WHAT STATE YOU'RE IN.

208. JOSH, KEEP THE WATER...

209. I GOT TO TAKE THIS. HOLD ON.

210. FIND THE YELLOW PAGES AND DRIVE UP AND DOWN COLORADO.

211. COLORADO.

212. I'M SORRY.

213. I CAN'T HELP YOU AT THIS TIME.

214. COULD YOU GIVE ME A CALL BACK?

215. COLORADO.

216. OHH!

217. [ MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ] OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK,

218. OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK.

219. I AM PIG MAN.

220. I AM PIG MAN.

221. WOULD YOU LIKE A GLASS OF WINE?

222. OH, I SEE YOU IN TWO MINUTES.

223. OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK.

224. PIG MAN... I THINK I WANT TO MAKE LOVE TO YOU.

225. I HAVE TO COME BACK IN TWO

226. MINUTES, OKAY?

227. I AM PIG MAN.

228. I AM PIG MAN.

229. I AM PIG MAN.

230. I AM PIG MAN.

231. I SEE YOU IN TWO MINUTES.

232. MM-HMM.

233. KID'S IN THE HOSPITAL.

234. IT'S VERY STRESSFUL.

235. OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK, OINK,

236. OINK, OINK.

237. OKAY.

238. OINK, OINK.

239. I'M HERE.

240. OINK, OINK, AHH.

241. OINK, OINK.

242. OINK.

243. AH, AH, AH.