1. Pio! Pio! Pio!Copy !req
2. Ciao Rome!Copy !req
3. Ciao world!Copy !req
4. What have we forgotten?Copy !req
5. What have we forgotten?Copy !req
6. We have forgotten you!Copy !req
7. Let me be very clear:Copy !req
8. I'm here for one, very simple reason.Copy !req
9. To not forget anyone.Copy !req
10. God does not leave anyone behind.Copy !req
11. That is what He told me
when I decided to serve Him.Copy !req
12. And it is what I say to you now.Copy !req
13. I serve God.Copy !req
14. I serve you.Copy !req
15. We've forgotten
the women and childrenCopy !req
16. who will change this world
with their love and their kindness.Copy !req
17. And with their marvellous,
divine disposition to play.Copy !req
18. Play is the only authentic means we haveCopy !req
19. to make us feel in harmony with life.Copy !req
20. And to be in harmony with God
we have to be in harmony with life.Copy !req
21. We don't have a choice:Copy !req
22. we must be in harmony with God!Copy !req
23. And what else have we forgotten?Copy !req
24. We have forgotten to masturbateCopy !req
25. to use contraceptivesCopy !req
26. to get abortionsCopy !req
27. to celebrate gay marriagesCopy !req
28. to allow priests to love each other,
and even to get married.Copy !req
29. We've forgotten that we can
decide to die if you detest livingCopy !req
30. we've forgotten
to have sexual relationsCopy !req
31. for purposes other than procreation
without feeling guilty!Copy !req
32. To divorce, to let nuns say massCopy !req
33. to make babies in all the ways
science has discoveredCopy !req
34. and will continue to discover.Copy !req
35. In shortCopy !req
36. my dear, dear childrenCopy !req
37. not only have we forgotten to playCopy !req
38. we have forgotten to be happy.Copy !req
39. And there is only one road
that leads to happiness.Copy !req
40. And that road is called freedom.Copy !req
41. Sancti Apostoli Petrus et PaulusCopy !req
42. de quorum potestate
et auctoritate confidimus...Copy !req
43. What are you saying, Lenny?
What's all this nonsense?Copy !req
44. You're not the Pope, Lenny!Copy !req
45. I am the Pope!Copy !req
46. I'm the Pope, and you, LennyCopy !req
47. are no longer a member of the Church.Copy !req
48. You are done with God, Lenny.Copy !req
49. What you mean done?Copy !req
50. I just barely got started with God.Copy !req
51. Who are you, Lenny?Copy !req
52. I am a contradiction.Copy !req
53. Like God.
One in three and three in one.Copy !req
54. Like Mary, virgin and mother.Copy !req
55. Like man, good and evil.Copy !req
56. I am the Pope.Copy !req
57. I am the Pope.Copy !req
58. Not knowing your tastes,
Your HolinessCopy !req
59. we took the liberty of preparing
a little of everything.Copy !req
60. Didn't anyone tell you I don't eat much?
Hardly anything, in fact!Copy !req
61. All I have in the morning
is a Cherry Coke Zero.Copy !req
62. We will get some right away.Copy !req
63. What's your name?
- Domen, Your Holiness.Copy !req
64. I am Your Holiness's major-domo.Copy !req
65. Do you know what Domen means?
- 'One who belongs to God'.Copy !req
66. Precisely.
So, by transitive property...Copy !req
67. you belong to me.Copy !req
68. How did you sleep, Your Holiness?Copy !req
69. I had an amusing dream.Copy !req
70. Cardinal Ozolins and Cardinal Aguirre
were slapping each otherCopy !req
71. and I said the most outrageous things
to the crowdCopy !req
72. in Saint Peter's Square.Copy !req
73. Well then, I'll wait here
for my Cherry Coke Zero.Copy !req
74. In the meantime would Your Holiness
care for a regular Diet Coke?Copy !req
75. Oh... let's not utter heresies, Domen.Copy !req
76. It's death
to settle for things in life.Copy !req
77. Holy Father, while you wait,
may I present Sister BiceCopy !req
78. from Nepi,
in delightful province of Lazio.Copy !req
79. She will be your personal cook.Copy !req
80. Sister Bice also served three pontiffs
who came before you.Copy !req
81. When she was young,
she was a missionary in IndiaCopy !req
82. and fortunately for us,
she speaks a good English.Copy !req
83. Well, my sweet Holy FatherCopy !req
84. now what is it you would like
to have for your lunch?Copy !req
85. You just tell your Bice what you wantCopy !req
86. and I'll prepare it for you.Copy !req
87. Matriciana, pasta e fagioli,
carbonara, lasagne...Copy !req
88. Am I mistaken, did she say 'my sweet'?Copy !req
89. Your Holiness,
Sister Bice is rather... quaint.Copy !req
90. No, Domen, she is not quaint.Copy !req
91. She's friendly.
Mother...Copy !req
92. Let me explain something to you,
that you, in your long lifeCopy !req
93. have not yet had the occasion
to understand:Copy !req
94. friendly relationships are dangerous.Copy !req
95. They lend themselves to ambiguitiesCopy !req
96. misunderstandings, and conflictsCopy !req
97. and they always end badly.Copy !req
98. Formal relationships,
on the other handCopy !req
99. are as clear as spring water.Copy !req
100. Their rules are carved in stone.Copy !req
101. There's no risk of being misunderstood
and they last forever.Copy !req
102. Now, you need to knowCopy !req
103. I do not appreciate
friendly relationships.Copy !req
104. But I'm a great admirer
of formal ones.Copy !req
105. Where there are formal relationships
there are ritesCopy !req
106. and where there are rites
the earth order reigns.Copy !req
107. Your Holiness, His Eminence
the Cardinal Secretary of StateCopy !req
108. and the Prefects
of the Various CongregationsCopy !req
109. can't wait to make your acquaintance
and to welcome you.Copy !req
110. Well, they're gonna have to.Copy !req
111. Because first I have to drink
my Cherry Coke Zero.Copy !req
112. Look, guys,
the Holy Spirit is blowing away.Copy !req
113. Speaking of the Holy Spirit,
what do you think?Copy !req
114. Did He illumine the cardinals?Copy !req
115. The naiveté of you Africans
is really touching.Copy !req
116. Do you really believe
that the Holy Spirit elects the Pope?Copy !req
117. We Africans, noCopy !req
118. but we Catholics, yes,
that is what we believe.Copy !req
119. Don't you, Ozolins?Copy !req
120. Well the Holy Spirit is not stupid
but He is ironic and cunning.Copy !req
121. I don't understand.Copy !req
122. What he's trying to tell you
is that here in Vatican...Copy !req
123. the Holy Spirit
is just another name for Voiello.Copy !req
124. Belardo is forty-seven years old.Copy !req
125. That's young.Copy !req
126. Which means we won't live
to see another pope. How sad!Copy !req
127. Caltanissetta, it's already a miracleCopy !req
128. that you've lived long enough
to see this one.Copy !req
129. I'm not so sure that Voiello
has shown good leadership this time.Copy !req
130. I've never
really trusted Voiello myself.Copy !req
131. He's the devil incarnate.Copy !req
132. Spencer would have been
the right choice.Copy !req
133. Far too independentCopy !req
134. and that wouldn't have been
a good news for us cardinals.Copy !req
135. True.Copy !req
136. But all we have in exchange
is a telegenic puppet.Copy !req
137. And that means
that he can be manipulated.Copy !req
138. This is a masterpiece
of Voiello's diplomatic cunningCopy !req
139. the way he shepherded
the cardinals' votes to Belardo.Copy !req
140. Now Belardo holds officeCopy !req
141. but Voiello is pulling the strings.Copy !req
142. And he'll run things
the way we tell himCopy !req
143. because once again we saved his life.Copy !req
144. I may be African, and I may be naiveCopy !req
145. but if you ask me...Copy !req
146. you're simplifying the future
to an unhealthy degree.Copy !req
147. I'm in agreement
with our African colleague.Copy !req
148. What do you mean by that?Copy !req
149. That you've forgotten
to ask one fundamental question.Copy !req
150. What's Spencer going to do nowCopy !req
151. that his beloved, detested protégéCopy !req
152. has become pope?Copy !req
153. 'My God, my GodCopy !req
154. why have you forsaken me?'Copy !req
155. said Jesus before he was about to die.Copy !req
156. Which is what I say to you now,
before I begin to live.Copy !req
157. God's infinite silence...Copy !req
158. God's infinite silence...Copy !req
159. God's infinite silence.Copy !req
160. Your Holiness...Copy !req
161. your sins.Copy !req
162. I don't have any sins to confess.Copy !req
163. Are you serious?Copy !req
164. My only sin,
- and it's an enormous one -Copy !req
165. is that my conscience
does not accuse me of anything.Copy !req
166. Ego te absolvo peccatis
tuis in nomine PatrisCopy !req
167. et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti. Amen.Copy !req
168. If I always heard confessions
like yours, Your HolinessCopy !req
169. I'd be out of a job.Copy !req
170. How many confessions do you hear
in the Vatican, Don Tommaso?Copy !req
171. Me?Copy !req
172. The entire CuriaCopy !req
173. a good number of nuns and priestsCopy !req
174. as well as several lay employees
who work in Vatican City.Copy !req
175. How old are you?Copy !req
176. Sixty-one.Copy !req
177. And how's your eyesight?Copy !req
178. I don't even wear glasses.Copy !req
179. And your hearing?Copy !req
180. My only problem is my hair,
Your Holiness.Copy !req
181. You mean it's falling out?Copy !req
182. Not only that. Sometimes it hurts.Copy !req
183. Your hair hurts?Copy !req
184. Good, very good!Copy !req
185. I'll be frank, Don Tommaso,
I need you.Copy !req
186. You must do something very importantCopy !req
187. for the eminency of your pontiff.Copy !req
188. Whatever you wish,
Holy Father. Tell me.Copy !req
189. Come then, I'll tell you
in the confessional.Copy !req
190. Confessional booths are so beautiful.Copy !req
191. They look like little mountain huts.Copy !req
192. Do you like the mountains?Copy !req
193. I don't like the snow.Copy !req
194. Here's what I want you to do.Copy !req
195. Ma.Copy !req
196. Don't ever call me Ma.
Call me Sister Mary.Copy !req
197. What's that?Copy !req
198. My father gave it to me.Copy !req
199. You can give it to me if you like.
I'll hold on to it for you.Copy !req
200. No. My father said that
I should always keep it with me.Copy !req
201. Lenny!Copy !req
202. Sister Mary.Copy !req
203. Here you are, my saint.Copy !req
204. No, I'm not a saint.Copy !req
205. Yes.Copy !req
206. Do you still have it on you?Copy !req
207. Always.Copy !req
208. What's this?Copy !req
209. A replica of the grotto
of Our Lady of Lourdes.Copy !req
210. It's being restored.Copy !req
211. From now on, you're going to be living
at the exact centre of the Church.Copy !req
212. But I don't understand.
What does that mean?Copy !req
213. That means that just nowCopy !req
214. the centre of the Church
took a few steps back.Copy !req
215. Do you like the apartment?Copy !req
216. I'll be just fine here.Copy !req
217. You're only a few feet away from me.Copy !req
218. On the plane I read
this amusing description of Rome:Copy !req
219. "A suburb of Vatican City.Copy !req
220. Well, that's not exactly trueCopy !req
221. but it will be.Copy !req
222. What's wrong, Lenny?Copy !req
223. What's not wrong, Sister Mary.Copy !req
224. North is that way.Copy !req
225. Where Venice is.Copy !req
226. Listen to me, Lenny.Copy !req
227. Starting today,
you have to lead the Church.Copy !req
228. One billion people.Copy !req
229. One fifth of the world's population.Copy !req
230. Do you understand
what I'm saying, Lenny?Copy !req
231. One billion people will depend
on what you say and do.Copy !req
232. They'll make important decisions
- happy or sad, of life or death -Copy !req
233. in order to obey you,
in the name of God.Copy !req
234. All of this creates a new perspective.Copy !req
235. An immense perspective.Copy !req
236. Now, your personal aches,
your enormous sufferingsCopy !req
237. your terrible memories...Copy !req
238. It's a harsh thing to say,
Lenny, but I have to say itCopy !req
239. they must take a back seat.Copy !req
240. They are things of this earth.Copy !req
241. Do you understand
what I'm saying, Lenny?Copy !req
242. I know all your sorrowsCopy !req
243. I've lived with them
together with youCopy !req
244. I've wept over them with youCopy !req
245. but now the time has come for youCopy !req
246. to let your sorrows fade.Copy !req
247. To become irrelevant,
distant memoriesCopy !req
248. insignificant, vanquished,
destroyed and overpoweredCopy !req
249. by the terrible responsibility
that God has given you.Copy !req
250. From now on,
you are no longer Lenny BelardoCopy !req
251. the fatherless, motherless boy.Copy !req
252. From now onCopy !req
253. you are Pope Pius XIII.Copy !req
254. Father and Mother
of the entire Catholic Church.Copy !req
255. Allow me to say,
Your Holiness, what joy!Copy !req
256. What joy!Copy !req
257. The Holy Spirit could not
have illumined us in a better manner.Copy !req
258. In the name of the entire Church,
welcome.Copy !req
259. May your pontificate be long,
radiant, and fruitful.Copy !req
260. Let's settle for long.Copy !req
261. What a telling joke!Copy !req
262. Jokes are never telling.Copy !req
263. They're jokes.Copy !req
264. Well, Holy fatherCopy !req
265. first of all,
a small piece of informationCopy !req
266. of a practical
and picturesque nature...Copy !req
267. Under your desk, on the right,
you will find a button.Copy !req
268. If you feel that an encounter
is becoming disagreeableCopy !req
269. or a waste of timeCopy !req
270. all you have to do is
to press it discreetlyCopy !req
271. and an assistant will swiftly appear
with some excuseCopy !req
272. liberating you from your engagement.Copy !req
273. He'll lie, in other words.Copy !req
274. Yes, but he'll have plenty of time
and opportunity to repent.Copy !req
275. Well, Holy Father, if you agreeCopy !req
276. I would like to start
with our top priorities.Copy !req
277. The most urgent of them allCopy !req
278. is your first homily
in Saint Peter's Square.Copy !req
279. There is a great deal
of agitation about itCopy !req
280. something which I, in my long careerCopy !req
281. have never quite seen before.Copy !req
282. The entire office of the Secretary
of State is working on it.Copy !req
283. I myself
worked all night long on a rough draftCopy !req
284. which I would like to submit you.Copy !req
285. The press and the faithful
who are coming hereCopy !req
286. from every corner of the globeCopy !req
287. were all convinced that you were going
to deliver your homily today.Copy !req
288. We did an excellent job
at calming their spiritsCopy !req
289. but at the same time, Your HolinessCopy !req
290. I am sorry to say
that we can only delay for so long.Copy !req
291. Tomorrow would be ideal.Copy !req
292. There, this is the most pressing issue.Copy !req
293. The most pressing issue is my need
for a cup of American coffee.Copy !req
294. Would you make me one, Your Eminence?Copy !req
295. Certainly.
Amatucci.Copy !req
296. I didn't ask him.Copy !req
297. I asked you.Copy !req
298. It will be a pleasure
and an honor for meCopy !req
299. to bring you coffee, Your Holiness.Copy !req
300. Thank you, Your Eminence.
- It's my duty, Blessed Father.Copy !req
301. Holy Father, now, about your homilyCopy !req
302. how would we like to proceed, then?Copy !req
303. Later.Copy !req
304. And has the Holy Father
already thought of some candidatesCopy !req
305. for the delicate role
of a special assistant?Copy !req
306. - I have an idea.
- I do too.Copy !req
307. Monsignor Gemelli comes to mind...Copy !req
308. My idea is Sister Mary.Copy !req
309. An admirable idea, Your HolinessCopy !req
310. and completely understandable.Copy !req
311. Allow me to add, however,
that unfortunatelyCopy !req
312. the Curia has complex mechanismsCopy !req
313. which might seem like astrophysics.Copy !req
314. Therefore, the Holy Father's
inevitable lack of experienceCopy !req
315. together with Sister Mary's
inevitable lack of experienceCopy !req
316. would lead me to suggest
an internal contribution...Copy !req
317. Of course I realize how central
Sister Mary seems to you.Copy !req
318. We could invent
a sort of ad hoc role for her.Copy !req
319. We don't lack for imagination
around here.Copy !req
320. Yeah.Copy !req
321. You're exactly right, Voiello.
She's central.Copy !req
322. Sister Mary took me in at her orphanage
when I was 7 years oldCopy !req
323. she raised me and she loved me.
She made me a good Christian.Copy !req
324. A great Christian!Copy !req
325. Monsignor Gemelli is experienced,
I would rely on him.Copy !req
326. Perhaps you didn't hear me correctly.Copy !req
327. Perhaps, Holy Father.
My English does have its limits.Copy !req
328. You'd better improve it then.Copy !req
329. Sister Mary
will be my special assistant.Copy !req
330. As you wish, Holy Father.Copy !req
331. Then, of course,
there is the matter of draftingCopy !req
332. and delivering your address
to the College of Cardinals.Copy !req
333. They're all still here.Copy !req
334. They will not leave the Vatican
until you address them.Copy !req
335. Later.Copy !req
336. In the office of the SecretaryCopy !req
337. we have been wondering
if the Holy FatherCopy !req
338. would care to provide us
with some indicationsCopy !req
339. regarding the draft of an encyclical.Copy !req
340. Later.Copy !req
341. The prefects
of the various congregationsCopy !req
342. are of course eager
to see you with their own eyes.Copy !req
343. But I imagine that you would like
to deal with this matter... later.Copy !req
344. No, now.Copy !req
345. First off, I want to meet the Prefect
for the Congregation for the Clergy.Copy !req
346. At any rate, Holy FatherCopy !req
347. I understand your reluctance
about the encyclical.Copy !req
348. Your predecessor
always made me laughCopy !req
349. when he said that...Copy !req
350. an encyclical is like Proust's
"In Search of Lost Time".Copy !req
351. Everyone quotes it,
but no one reads it.Copy !req
352. Are you sleeping, Holy Father?Copy !req
353. No Your Eminence, I'm praying.Copy !req
354. For you.Copy !req
355. Stop looking at the Venus
of Willendorf in that way.Copy !req
356. Holy Father, Holy FatherCopy !req
357. smoking is not allowed
in the papal palace!Copy !req
358. Is that so?Copy !req
359. Who decided that?
- John Paul II.Copy !req
360. The Pope?
- Yes, the Pope.Copy !req
361. There's a new Pope now.Copy !req
362. True.Copy !req
363. - Your Eminence...
- Yes, Holy Father.Copy !req
364. You're too tied to the past.Copy !req
365. They say the same thing about you,
Your Holiness.Copy !req
366. The past is an enormous place,
with all sorts of things inside.Copy !req
367. Not so with the present.Copy !req
368. The present is merely
a narrow openingCopy !req
369. with room for only one pair of eyes.Copy !req
370. Mine.Copy !req
371. Your eminence.
- Yes.Copy !req
372. Our top priorities.Copy !req
373. Here I am. As I was saying...Copy !req
374. You will be in charge of politicsCopy !req
375. finance, theologyCopy !req
376. appointments and promotions.Copy !req
377. I will take care of worldly mattersCopy !req
378. travel, adulation of the masses,
celebrations.Copy !req
379. A most effective division
of roles, Holy Father.Copy !req
380. - Your Eminence.
- Yes, Blessed Father?Copy !req
381. I was just kidding.Copy !req
382. That wasn't obvious?
- Hardly!Copy !req
383. So, as I was saying,
our top priorities are...Copy !req
384. the Radio Vatican
signal needs boosting.Copy !req
385. It is unacceptable
that reception is so poor.Copy !req
386. the pope wants to see
all the gifts the pope receives.Copy !req
387. Have a storage facility fitted out
for storing all the gifts I receive.Copy !req
388. the Vatican must immediately
buy back the papal tiaraCopy !req
389. from the basilica in Washington DCCopy !req
390. which my predecessors,
who favored sobriety over traditionCopy !req
391. imprudently let go.Copy !req
392. And four:Copy !req
393. Sister Mary will also look after you.Copy !req
394. She will oversee all your activitiesCopy !req
395. and report directly back to me.Copy !req
396. She will be your guardian angel.Copy !req
397. I'm sixty years, Holy Father.Copy !req
398. I don't need a guardian angel.Copy !req
399. Oh, we all need a guardian angel,
Voiello.Copy !req
400. Especially unscrupulous,
ambiguous men.Copy !req
401. Then, please,
allow me to choose mine myself.Copy !req
402. In another life.Copy !req
403. In this lifeCopy !req
404. the Pope chooses
your guardian angel for you.Copy !req
405. And he is the Pope.Copy !req
406. Did you call for me, Holy Father?Copy !req
407. It all comes back to this
in the end, doesn't it?Copy !req
408. To the mother.Copy !req
409. What was your mother like,
Monsignor Gutierrez?Copy !req
410. She was a woman
who did not scorn wickedness.Copy !req
411. And it had the effect of creating
a son full of goodness.Copy !req
412. I inquired about you.Copy !req
413. Everyone tells me you are
a shining example of goodness.Copy !req
414. I thank you for believing them,
Holy Father.Copy !req
415. It is I who should thank youCopy !req
416. for allowing me to be here
without hordes of tourists.Copy !req
417. That's my duty, Holy Father.Copy !req
418. Was it hard to close off
the Basilica to tourists?Copy !req
419. No, no, all we had to do
was hang up a sign saying "closed".Copy !req
420. I will never shed
my aversion to tourists.Copy !req
421. Why is that, Holy Father?Copy !req
422. Because they are just passing through.Copy !req
423. I was late
because I couldn't find your office.Copy !req
424. I know. You opened the wrong doorCopy !req
425. and found yourself face to face
with some visitors to our museum.Copy !req
426. So you've been inquiring about me too.Copy !req
427. It's very difficult to keep
anything secret here in the Vatican.Copy !req
428. Rumors fly so quicklyCopy !req
429. that sometimes they arrive
even before the event has taken place.Copy !req
430. That's quite a useful piece
of information for my future.Copy !req
431. Which is exactly what it was
intended to be, Holy Father.Copy !req
432. What is one to do, Monsignor?Copy !req
433. It's the times.
In America, we call it gossip.Copy !req
434. Here in the Vatican
we call it calumny.Copy !req
435. This way.Copy !req
436. How many years
have you been at the Vatican?Copy !req
437. So many that I've stopped counting.Copy !req
438. Do you like it here?Copy !req
439. Yes, I feel safe here.Copy !req
440. It's as if time were dead.Copy !req
441. Speaking of that timeCopy !req
442. the other day, during the ConclaveCopy !req
443. I read an Italian newspaper.Copy !req
444. It was an article
about this politicianCopy !req
445. who had hidden some compromising filesCopy !req
446. in the gaps
between the walls of his house.Copy !req
447. Yes, I read about that as well.Copy !req
448. I thought...Copy !req
449. I wouldn't need to hide anything
in the gaps in my house.Copy !req
450. Because my mind is a gap.Copy !req
451. And everything that is hidden from meCopy !req
452. sooner or later...Copy !req
453. is revealed.Copy !req
454. As if it were being entrusted to me.Copy !req
455. A precious skill
for leading the Church.Copy !req
456. It's not a skill, Gutierrez...Copy !req
457. it's my destiny.Copy !req
458. See how beautiful it is?Copy !req
459. Fabulous.Copy !req
460. Go on, Tommaso, don't be afraid.Copy !req
461. But violating the secret
of the confessional is...Copy !req
462. No, no, it's not.Copy !req
463. Not if the information
is intended for me, the PontiffCopy !req
464. and is for the survival of our Church.Copy !req
465. Don't disappoint me, Tommaso.Copy !req
466. Your Holiness,
I'm just a poor, simple priestCopy !req
467. and the secret of the confessionalCopy !req
468. is the only respectable thing I have.Copy !req
469. Today. But think of tomorrow.Copy !req
470. Scarlet robes and the ring
are in your future.Copy !req
471. The cardinalship, my dear.Copy !req
472. Which is much more respectable.Copy !req
473. What if someone hears us?Copy !req
474. Only he can hear us up here.Copy !req
475. Who knows where he is?Copy !req
476. There! By the big dipper.Copy !req
477. That's where God's house is.Copy !req
478. God's house!Copy !req
479. What's it like?Copy !req
480. Half of a duplex,
with a private swimming pool.Copy !req
481. Come on now, tell me people's sins.Copy !req
482. Well...Copy !req
483. have I already told you
about Voiello's impure thoughtsCopy !req
484. about the Venus of Willendorf?Copy !req
485. Yes, yes you told me already. What else?
- Yes.Copy !req
486. No, nothing...Copy !req
487. Cardinal Aguirre did an imitation
of you today, Your Holiness.Copy !req
488. Everyone laughed.
- Did you laugh?Copy !req
489. Yes, but to myself. So no one noticed.Copy !req
490. Good. What else?Copy !req
491. Everybody is wondering
who Sister Mary is to youCopy !req
492. what she's doing here.Copy !req
493. What else?Copy !req
494. Everybody is also wondering:Copy !req
495. is the Pope thinking
about his first homily?Copy !req
496. I ask myself
the same thing all the time.Copy !req
497. Of course I'm thinking about it.Copy !req
498. It's all I think about.
I even dreamed about it.Copy !req
499. I'm going to let you in on a secret:Copy !req
500. ever since I was little,
I've learned to confound people's ideasCopy !req
501. of what's going on in my head.Copy !req
502. You're so wise, Holy Father.Copy !req
503. Not only thatCopy !req
504. I'm also intransigentCopy !req
505. irritableCopy !req
506. vindictive...Copy !req
507. and I have a prodigious memory.Copy !req
508. And now I want to make my confession.Copy !req
509. Fine. Let's go back downstairs.Copy !req
510. No, here.Copy !req
511. Before the house of God.Copy !req
512. Oh... okay.Copy !req
513. In nomine Patris,
et Filii et Spiritus Sancti.Copy !req
514. God, my conscience does not accuse meCopy !req
515. because you do not believe
I am capable of repenting.Copy !req
516. And therefore,
I do not believe in you.Copy !req
517. I don't believe you are capable
of saving me from myself.Copy !req
518. Holy Father, what are you saying?Copy !req
519. I'm saying that I don't believe in God,
Tommaso.Copy !req
520. What are you saying, Blessed Father?Copy !req
521. Tommaso, Tommaso.Copy !req
522. I was joking.Copy !req