1. - I almost gave up on you.
- Sorry. Checkout lines were worse than rush hour on the 95.
Copy !req
2. If I heard "Silent Night" one more time
I was going to start taking hostages.
Copy !req
3. - What are we doing here?
- Stakeout.
Copy !req
4. - On Christmas Eve?
- It's an important date.
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5. - No kidding.
- Important to why we're here.
Copy !req
6. Why don't you turn off your
car and I'll fill you in on the details.
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7. Mulder, I've got wrapping to do.
It's the night before Christmas.
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8. Let's hear it.
Give me the details.
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9. Look, if you've got Christmas stuff
to do I don't want to... you know...
Copy !req
10. Mulder, I drove all the way out here.
I might as well know why. Right?
Copy !req
11. I just thought you'd be more... curious.
Copy !req
12. - Who lives in the house?
- No one.
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13. - Then who are we staking out?
- The former occupants.
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14. - They've come back?
- That's the story.
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15. I see.
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16. The dark, gothic manor the, uh, omnipresent
low fog hugging the thicket of overgrowth.
Copy !req
17. Wait... is that a hound I hear
baying out on the moors?
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18. No. Actually that was a left cheek sneak.
Copy !req
19. Mulder, tell me you didn't call me out here
on Christmas Eve to go ghost busting with you.
Copy !req
20. - Technically speaking they're called apparitions.
- Mulder, call it what you want.
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21. I've got holiday cheer to spread.
I've got a family roll call under the tree at 6:00 a.m.
Copy !req
22. I'll make it fast.
I'll just give you the details.
Copy !req
23. - Okay.
- Christmas, 1917. It was a time of dark, dark despair.
Copy !req
24. American soldiers were dying at an ungodly rate
in a war-torn Europe while at home, a deadly strain...
Copy !req
25. of the flu virus attacked young and old alike.
Tragedy was a visitor on every doorstep while a...
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26. creeping hopelessness set in with every man,
woman and child. It was a time of dark, dark despair.
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27. You said that.
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28. But here at 1501 Larkspur Lane for a pair of
star-crossed lovers tragedy came not...
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29. from war or pestilence, not by the boot heel
or the bombardier, but by their own innocent hand.
Copy !req
30. - Go on.
- His name was Maurice. He was a...
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31. a brooding but heroic young man beloved
of Lyda, a sublime beauty with a light...
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32. that seemed to follow her wherever she went.
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33. They were likened to two angels descended from
heaven whom the gods could not protect from the...
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34. horrors being visited upon this cold, grey earth.
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35. And what happened to them?
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36. Driven by a tragic fear of separation they forged a
lovers' pact so that they might spend eternity together...
Copy !req
37. - ... and not spend one precious Christmas apart.
- They killed themselves?
Copy !req
38. And their ghosts haunt
this house every Christmas Eve.
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39. I just gave myself chills.
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40. It's a good story, Mulder... And very
well told but I don't believe it.
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41. You don't believe in ghosts?
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42. - That surprises you?
- Well... Yeah. I thought everybody believed in ghosts.
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43. Mulder, if it were any other night I might let you
talk me into it but the halls are decked and I got to go.
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44. - My best to the family.
- What are you doing?
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45. - Mulder, don't you have somewhere to be?
- I'm just going to take a look.
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46. I'm not going to do it.
My New Year's resolution.
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47. Mulder!
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48. - Change your mind?
- Did you take my car keys?
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49. No.
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50. - Come on, Mulder. Don't kid around.
- Why would I take your car keys?
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51. Maybe you, uh...
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52. - Maybe you grabbed them by mistake.
- Maybe it was a ghost.
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53. - Cold wind.
- There must be a window open upstairs.
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54. You know, the weather report said that there
was an 80 percent chance of rain maybe even a...
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55. maybe even a white Christmas.
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56. I think the spirits are among us.
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57. Mulder, will you quit trying to scare
me and help me get these doors open.
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58. Sounds like there's somebody
walking around upstairs.
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59. There. You hear that?
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60. - Mulder, I really have to go.
- There's nothing to be afraid of.
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61. - I'm not afraid, okay?
- Ghosts are benevolent entities.
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62. Mostly.
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63. You are not scaring me, Mulder.
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64. Look, I really have to get home.
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65. Mulder...
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66. What was that?
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67. These are tricks that the mind plays. They are ingrained
cliches from a thousand different horror films.
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68. When we hear a sound, we get a chill. We-we
see a shadow and we allow ourselves to imagine...
Copy !req
69. something that an otherwise rational
person would discount out of hand.
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70. The whole... Mulder...?
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71. The whole idea of a benevolent entity
fits perfectly with what I'm saying.
Copy !req
72. That a spirit would materialize or return for no other
purpose than to show itself is silly and ridiculous.
Copy !req
73. I mean, what it really shows is how silly and
ridiculous we have become in believing such things.
Copy !req
74. I mean, that we can ignore all natural laws
about the corporeal body that-that we...
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75. witness these spirits clad in-in their own shabby
outfits with the same old haircuts and hairstyles...
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76. never aging, never... never in search of more
comfortable surroundings, it actually ends up...
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77. saying more about the living
than it does about the dead.
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78. I mean, Mulder, it doesn't take an advanced
degree in psychology to understand the...
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79. the unconscious yearnings
that these imaginings satisfy.
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80. You know, the-the longing for immortality...
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81. the hope that there is something beyond this mortal coil,
that-that we might never be long without our loved ones.
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82. I mean, these are powerful, powerful desires.
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83. I mean, they're the very
essence of what make us human.
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84. The very essence of Christmas, actually.
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85. Tell me you're not afraid.
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86. All right. I'm afraid...
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87. but it's an irrational fear.
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88. - I got your back.
- Thank you.
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89. Mulder, did it occur to you that there aren't ghosts here
but that somebody actually might be living in this house?
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90. No one lives here.
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91. But when you and I were sitting out
in the car there was not a light on.
Copy !req
92. And look at this.
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93. Must have been some kind of electrical surge.
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94. Mulder, did you happen to notice the
clock downstairs is keeping perfect time?
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95. Is it?
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96. And how do you explain that?
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97. This fire has just gone out.
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98. Yeah.
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99. Don't look so disappointed.
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100. Why would anyone want
to live in a cursed house?
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101. Mulder, it's not enough that
it's haunted? It has to be cursed?
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102. Every couple that's ever
lived here has met a tragic end.
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103. Three double murders in the last
80 years. All on Christmas Eve.
Copy !req
104. Whoa... There's that sound again.
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105. Mulder?
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106. - That's not funny!
- I think there's a hiding space under the floorboards.
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107. What are you going to do?
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108. There may be somebody trapped under there.
I got to get them out.
Copy !req
109. - Mulder, don't. Not now.
- Hey, you have a gun, right?
Copy !req
110. Rationally, you've been in much
more dangerous situations.
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111. I was half right.
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112. Oh, my God.
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113. Hey, Scully...
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114. Look at this.
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115. It's a woman.
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116. - Mulder, it looks like they were shot to death.
- Yeah.
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117. You know what's weird?
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118. What?
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119. Mulder, she's wearing my outfit.
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120. How embarrassing.
Copy !req
121. Yeah, well, you know what?
He's wearing yours.
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122. Oh... Scully...
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123. That's us.
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124. Hey, Scully...
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125. This is the same room.
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126. All right.
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127. I'm beginning to... Get this.
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128. You go through that door and I...
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129. - I should come out... This door.
- Right.
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130. - Mulder!
- Scully!
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131. Scully!
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132. Hey, Scully.
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133. Scully, can you hear me?
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134. Hey!
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135. Who are you?
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136. That's a question I should be asking
being this is my house you're standing in.
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137. This isn't one of those home invasions, is it?
Copy !req
138. - No.
- Good. Would you like me to show you the door?
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139. That's very funny.
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140. - I wasn't making a joke.
- Have you looked at the door?
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141. - Uh-huh, I'm looking at it now.
- Tell me what you see.
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142. I see a door with the lock shot off it.
You going to pay for that?
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143. That's a door with a brick wall behind it.
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144. Okay, sure.
Copy !req
145. You're playing tricks on me.
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146. If I am, I'm sorry but I don't know any tricks.
Copy !req
147. Yeah? That's a trick in itself, isn't it?
You've been playing tricks on us since we got here.
Copy !req
148. Am I to take it we're not alone?
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149. Ah, that's very funny coming from a ghost.
Copy !req
150. Yeah, oh... the gun fooled me a little at first.
You're a ghost hunter, huh?
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151. And you think I'm a ghost, huh?
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152. I've seen a lot of strange folks coming
around here with a lot of strange equipment...
Copy !req
153. but I think you must be
the first I've seen come armed.
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154. Strange folks?
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155. Like those folks under the floorboard.
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156. - How did you do that?
- I didn't do anything.
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157. There were corpses here, bodies
buried under the floorboards.
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158. Why don't you have a seat, son.
Copy !req
159. - You drink? Take drugs?
- No.
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160. - Get high?
- No.
Copy !req
161. Are you overcome by the impulse
to make everyone believe you?
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162. I'm in the field of mental health.
I specialize in disorders and manias...
Copy !req
163. related to pathological behavior
as it pertains to the paranormal.
Copy !req
164. Wow. I didn't know such a thing existed.
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165. My specialty is in what I call soul prospectors.
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166. A crossaxial classification I've codified by
extensive interaction with visitors like yourself.
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167. I've found you all tend to fall
into pretty much the same category.
Copy !req
168. - And what category is that?
- Narcissistic, overzealous, self-righteous egomaniac.
Copy !req
169. - That's a category?
- You kindly think of yourself as single-minded...
Copy !req
170. but you're prone to obsessive
compulsiveness workaholism, antisocialism...
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171. Fertile fields for the descent
into total wacko breakdown.
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172. I don't think that pegs me exactly.
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173. Oh, really? Waving a gun
around my house? Huh?
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174. Raving like a lunatic about
some imaginary brick wall?
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175. You've probably convinced
yourself you've seen aliens.
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176. You know why you think
you see the things you do?
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177. Because I have seen them?
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178. 'Cause you're a lonely man. A lonely
man chasing paramasturbatory illusions...
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179. that you believe will give your life meaning
and significance and which your pathetic...
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180. social maladjustment makes
impossible for you to find elsewhere.
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181. You probably consider yourself passionate,
serious, misunderstood. Am I right?
Copy !req
182. "Paramasturbatory"?
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183. Most people would rather stick their fingers
in a wall socket than spend a minute with you.
Copy !req
184. - All right, now just, uh... Just back off for a second.
- Spend every Christmas this way... Alone?
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185. I'm not alone.
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186. - More self-delusion.
- No, I came here with my partner.
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187. - She's somewhere in the house.
- Behind a brick wall?
Copy !req
188. How'd you get her to come with you?
Steal her car keys?
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189. You know why you do it.
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190. Listen endlessly to her droning rationalizations.
'Cause you're afraid. Afraid of the loneliness.
Copy !req
191. Am I right?
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192. I'd just like to find my partner.
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193. Good... Easy.
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194. Piece of cake.
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195. Brick wall...
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196. Or brick wall?
Go ahead, change your life.
Copy !req
197. Mulder?
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198. - No, no, please, I won't hurt you.
- I'm a federal agent! I'm armed.
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199. - You're what?
- I'm armed.
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200. - You said...
- I'm armed.
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201. - You're a federal agent?
- Please, I'm a little on edge. Don't come any closer.
Copy !req
202. My name is Special Agent Dana Scully.
And, uh, I can...
Copy !req
203. I can show you my I.D.
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204. My goodness, I... I thought you were a ghost.
Copy !req
205. I can assure you that I'm not. I, uh,
I got stuck in this room looking for my partner.
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206. Oh, the gangly fellow with
the distinguished profile.
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207. - You've seen him?
- With you in the foyer. I thought he was a ghost, too.
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208. - That was you.
- I sleepwalk sometimes. I thought maybe I'd dreamed it.
Copy !req
209. - But then here you were again.
- I am sorry... I'm sorry.
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210. I didn't mean to scare you.
I, uh... It's just that we found bodies.
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211. - Bodies... Where?
- Right...
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212. You look like you saw a ghost.
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213. There are ghosts in this house, you know.
Copy !req
214. Who are you?
Copy !req
215. I live here, thank you very much.
Copy !req
216. Where's my partner?
Copy !req
217. - Why are you pointing that gun?
- There were corpses right there underneath the floor!
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218. I think maybe the ghosts
have been playing tricks on you.
Copy !req
219. I don't believe in ghosts.
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220. Then what are you doing here?
Copy !req
221. It's my partner.
Copy !req
222. - He believes in ghosts?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
223. Oh, you poor child.
Copy !req
224. You must have an awful small life.
Copy !req
225. Spending your Christmas Eve with him...
Copy !req
226. Running around chasing
things you don't even believe in.
Copy !req
227. Don't come any closer.
Copy !req
228. I can see it in your face... The fear...
The conflicted yearnings...
Copy !req
229. A subconscious desire to find
fulfillment through another.
Copy !req
230. - Intimacy through co-dependency.
- What?
Copy !req
231. Maybe you repress the truth about why you're really
here pretending it's out of duty or loyalty,
Copy !req
232. unable to admit your dirty little secret.
Copy !req
233. Your only joy in life is proving him wrong.
Copy !req
234. You don't know me.
Copy !req
235. And you don't live here.
Copy !req
236. - This isn't your house.
- You wouldn't think so, the way I'm being treated.
Copy !req
237. - Well, then why is all the furniture covered?
- We're having the house painted.
Copy !req
238. - Well then where's your Christmas tree?
- We're Jewish. Boo.
Copy !req
239. Hold it right there.
Don't make me shoot you.
Copy !req
240. Stay where you are.
Copy !req
241. We really attract them, don't we?
Copy !req
242. - Where's Mulder?
- Mulder? Is that his name?
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243. - Where is he?
- He'll be along.
Copy !req
244. Move over there.
Both of you, move.
Copy !req
245. Move over there.
Copy !req
246. Move over there!
Copy !req
247. This violates our civil rights.
I have friends at the ACLU.
Copy !req
248. Put your hands up.
Copy !req
249. You see what we've resorted to?
Gimmicks and cheap tricks.
Copy !req
250. We used to be so good at this.
Copy !req
251. We used to have years to drive
them mad. Now we get one night.
Copy !req
252. This pop psychology approach is crap.
All it does is annoy them.
Copy !req
253. When's the last time we
actually haunted anyone?
Copy !req
254. When was the last time we had a good double
murder? Not since the house was condemned.
Copy !req
255. This is embarrassing... amateur kid stuff.
Copy !req
256. Look, if we let our reputations slip they're
going to take us off the tourist literature.
Copy !req
257. Last year no one even showed up.
Copy !req
258. Of all days, why did you pick Christmas?
Why not Halloween?
Copy !req
259. Now, who is filled with hopelessness
and futility on Halloween?
Copy !req
260. Christmas comes but once a year.
Copy !req
261. You're right.
Copy !req
262. These two do seem pretty miserable.
Copy !req
263. We need to show them just
how lonely Christmas can be.
Copy !req
264. Now that's the old Yuletide spirit.
Copy !req
265. - Are you Agent Mulder?
- Who are you, now?
Copy !req
266. - What are you doing using my chair for a ladder?
- I'm trying to get out of this room.
Copy !req
267. - Trying to get out?
- Excuse me.
Copy !req
268. No, no. You can't get out that way.
Copy !req
269. - Masher.
- Frump.
Copy !req
270. I don't know who you're calling
a frump but I don't appreciate that.
Copy !req
271. Being manhandled, or called names.
Certainly not at this hour.
Copy !req
272. You're a ghost.
Copy !req
273. Oh, more names!
Copy !req
274. - What happened to the star-crossed lovers?
- Oh, let me tell you the romance is the first thing to go.
Copy !req
275. It's you.
Copy !req
276. You're Lyda, and that was Maurice.
Copy !req
277. But you've aged.
Copy !req
278. I hope your partner finds you
a lot more charming than I do.
Copy !req
279. Let's see where is it.
Copy !req
280. There it is.
Copy !req
281. I was young and beautiful once,
just like your partner.
Copy !req
282. Look at us.
Maurice was so handsome.
Copy !req
283. He didn't have a gut.
Copy !req
284. I hope you're not expecting
any great advantages to all this.
Copy !req
285. To all what?
Copy !req
286. I'm assuming you came here
with similar misconceptions.
Copy !req
287. We came here looking for you.
Copy !req
288. Oh, yeah? You didn't come
here to be together for eternity?
Copy !req
289. No.
Copy !req
290. Because you're filled with despair
and woeful Christmas melancholy?
Copy !req
291. Why?
Copy !req
292. - Maybe it was your partner then.
- What about her?
Copy !req
293. - You knew this house was haunted.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
294. Maybe you two should have discussed your
real feelings before you came out here.
Copy !req
295. I'm speaking from experience.
Copy !req
296. - What experience?
- I'm not going to get into semantics.
Copy !req
297. - A murder-suicide is all about trust.
- I thought you had a lovers' pact.
Copy !req
298. Poetic illusions aside, the outcome,
Mulder, is pretty much the same.
Copy !req
299. - I don't show my hole to just anyone.
- Why are you showing it to me?
Copy !req
300. It isn't like you're going to be
eating any Christmas ham, is it?
Copy !req
301. Oh, you're trying to tell me
that Scully's going to shoot me.
Copy !req
302. Scully is not going to shoot me.
Copy !req
303. Suit yourself, but if you shoot first,
for her, the rest is an act of faith.
Copy !req
304. - I wouldn't shoot her.
- Maybe she shoots herself.
Copy !req
305. I wouldn't let her.
Copy !req
306. The bodies under the floor...
Copy !req
307. Maybe that was just some
kind of Jungian symbolism.
Copy !req
308. Or maybe... there's a secret lovers' pact.
Copy !req
309. We're not lovers.
Copy !req
310. And this isn't a pure science.
Copy !req
311. But you're both so attractive and
there'll be a lot of time to work that out.
Copy !req
312. Go ahead, take it.
Copy !req
313. Take it.
Copy !req
314. Think of it as the last
Christmas you'll ever spend alone.
Copy !req
315. I locked it.
Copy !req
316. - For your protection.
- Stay away from me.
Copy !req
317. Look, I want you to get me out of here.
I am quite capable of pulling this trigger.
Copy !req
318. I'm glad to hear it.
Copy !req
319. You may well have to defend yourself
against that crazy partner of yours.
Copy !req
320. What have you done with him?
Copy !req
321. Kept him safe from his own
mad devices, at least for now.
Copy !req
322. Do you have any idea why he
brought you here to this house?
Copy !req
323. Look, all I know is this is just some
bad dream. This is all in my head.
Copy !req
324. Yet here you are waving a
gun at me like your partner.
Copy !req
325. Scully!
Copy !req
326. Do you realize how seriously
disturbed that man is?
Copy !req
327. How dark and lonely?
Copy !req
328. - What he's capable of?
- Scully?
Copy !req
329. - Mulder!
- Want your car keys?
Copy !req
330. Where did you get those?
Copy !req
331. He's got nowhere to go this Christmas.
Copy !req
332. No one to go with.
Copy !req
333. Did he happen to mention
a story about a lovers' pact?
Copy !req
334. Where did you get those keys?
Copy !req
335. The man is acting out
an unconscious yearning.
Copy !req
336. The deep-seated terror of being alone.
Copy !req
337. - Scully... Scully, are you there?
- I'm here, Mulder!
Copy !req
338. Open the door, Scully!
Copy !req
339. Open the door.
Copy !req
340. I've seen it happen too
many times in this house.
Copy !req
341. I don't believe you.
Just open the door.
Copy !req
342. - But...
- Open the door!
Copy !req
343. - Where's Scully?
- Mulder?
Copy !req
344. Mulder, what are you doing?
Copy !req
345. Mulder!
Copy !req
346. There's no getting out of here, Scully.
There's no way home.
Copy !req
347. Mulder, come on...
Copy !req
348. Mulder, don't come any closer.
You're scaring me. Put the gun down!
Copy !req
349. - You going to shoot me?
- I'm not going to shoot you!
Copy !req
350. - I don't want to shoot you!
- It's me or you... You or me.
Copy !req
351. - One of us has to do it.
- Mulder, look... We don't have to do this.
Copy !req
352. - Oh, yes, we do.
- We can get out of here.
Copy !req
353. Even if we could what's waiting for us?
More loneliness!
Copy !req
354. And then 365 more shopping
days till even more loneliness!
Copy !req
355. I don't believe what you're saying!
Mulder, I don't believe a word of it.
Copy !req
356. Merry Christmas, Scully.
Copy !req
357. And a happy New Year.
Copy !req
358. Let me go!
Copy !req
359. - Let me go!
- Mulder!
Copy !req
360. Let me go... Let me go...
Copy !req
361. Let me go!
Copy !req
362. Scully!
Copy !req
363. Scully?
Copy !req
364. Mulder... Is that you?
Copy !req
365. - What did you do?
- I didn't believe it, Mulder.
Copy !req
366. You didn't believe what?
Copy !req
367. I didn't believe that you'd do it...
Copy !req
368. That I would...
Copy !req
369. Merry Christmas, Mulder.
Copy !req
370. What are you doing?
Copy !req
371. Scully?
Copy !req
372. Scully...
Copy !req
373. Ah... I'm not going to make it.
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374. No, you're not...
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375. Not without me, you're not.
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376. Are you afraid, Mulder?
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377. I am.
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378. I am, too.
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379. You should have thought of this.
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380. - You should have.
- You shot me first!
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381. I didn't shoot you. You shot me.
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382. Scully...
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383. What?
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384. Get up.
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385. - I can't.
- Get up... You're not shot.
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386. What?
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387. Come on. It's a trick.
It's all in your head.
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388. You hear that?
It's Christmas.
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389. One for the books.
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390. We almost had those two, didn't we?
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391. Almost had them.
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392. - Two such lonely souls.
- We can't let our failures haunt us.
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393. You wonder what they were
really out here looking for.
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394. Hard to say. People now...
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395. This is just another joyless day of the year.
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396. - Not for us.
- No.
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397. We haven't forgotten
the meaning of Christmas.
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398. I don't deserve to be so happy.
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399. I can't help it.
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400. I just can't help it.
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401. Scrooge was better than his word. He
became as good a friend, as good a master and...
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402. as good a man as the good old city ever knew...
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403. or any other good old city, town or borough
in the good old world. And to Tiny Tim...
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404. I, uh...
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405. I couldn't sleep. I was, um...
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406. - Can I come in?
- Yeah.
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407. Aren't you supposed to be opening
Christmas gifts with your family?
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408. Mulder...
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409. None of that really happened out there tonight...
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410. That was all in our heads, right?
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411. I-it must have been.
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412. Not that, uh, my only joy
in life is proving you wrong.
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413. When have you proven me wrong?
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414. Well... Why else would you
want me out there with you?
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415. You didn't want to be there?
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416. Oh, that's, um...
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417. That's self-righteous and...
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418. - Narcissistic of me to say, isn't it?
- No, I mean...
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419. Maybe I did want to be out there with you.
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420. Now, um...
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421. I know we said that we weren't
going to exchange gifts but, uh...
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422. I got you... a little something.
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423. Mulder...
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424. Merry Christmas.
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425. Well, I got you a little something, too.
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