1. Hawaiian Flight 451 to HonoluluCopy !req
2. will be boarding in 15 minutes
through gate number 26.Copy !req
3. We will be boarding by row numbers.Copy !req
4. Please remain seated
until your section has been called.Copy !req
5. You headed home?Copy !req
6. Yeah.Copy !req
7. We were at the Amanari.Copy !req
8. It was fine.
The food was good.Copy !req
9. Not much to do there,
but we just like to sit around anyway.Copy !req
10. Which hotel were you at?Copy !req
11. - White Lotus.
- White Lotus?Copy !req
12. Our guide told us
someone was killed there.Copy !req
13. The body's on our plane.Copy !req
14. On our plane?
To Honolulu?Copy !req
15. Yeah. They're about to load
the body on our plane.Copy !req
16. Well, other than that,
did you have a good vacation?Copy !req
17. - It was my honeymoon.
- Oh, congratulations.Copy !req
18. How wonderful.
Was it everything you hoped?Copy !req
19. - Where's your wife?
- Yeah, where's your wife?Copy !req
20. No offense...Copy !req
21. leave me the fuck alone.Copy !req
22. Okay then.Copy !req
23. Oh my God,
who are these people?Copy !req
24. So, these two.Copy !req
25. They just got married
in the Hamptons.Copy !req
26. Her parents have a place there.Copy !req
27. - I bet they met on Raya.
- Totally.Copy !req
28. - She's in fashion.
- Marketing.Copy !req
29. He went to Dartmouth,
international finance.Copy !req
30. - She loves him, but...
- He's got a small dick.Copy !req
31. He's a closet Adderall snorter.Copy !req
32. - Gives him an edge at work.
- Makes his dick even smaller.Copy !req
33. Walmart heiress.Copy !req
34. She's meeting her friends
for a girls' trip.Copy !req
35. She gets on their nerves, but she pays
for everything, so they put up with her.Copy !req
36. She's an American Brigitte Bardot.Copy !req
37. - She loves animals.
- Hates Jews.Copy !req
38. High-end pimps
for a billionaire sex pervert.Copy !req
39. They're coming to recruit usCopy !req
40. for their Illuminati
pedophile sex ring.Copy !req
41. Hey, girls.Copy !req
42. - What, Mom?
- Liv,Copy !req
43. come up front.
I think you can see the resort.Copy !req
44. Up, up, up, up, up.Copy !req
45. Quinn.Copy !req
46. Here they come.Copy !req
47. Big smiles.Copy !req
48. Wave, Lani. There we are.Copy !req
49. Wave like you mean it, Lani.Copy !req
50. Look, Lani, I— I know
it's your first day on the job,Copy !req
51. and, uh, I don't know how it worked
at your other properties,Copy !req
52. but here,
self-disclosure is discouraged.Copy !req
53. Especially with these VIPs
who arrive on the boat.Copy !req
54. You know,
you don't wanna be too specificCopy !req
55. as a— as a presence,
as an identity.Copy !req
56. You wanna be more generic.Copy !req
57. - Generic?
- Yes.Copy !req
58. You know, it's a Japanese ethosCopy !req
59. where we are asked to disappear
behind our masksCopy !req
60. as pleasant interchangeable helpers.Copy !req
61. It's tropical kabuki.Copy !req
62. And the goal is to create
for the guestsCopy !req
63. an overall impression of vagueness
that can be very satisfying,Copy !req
64. where they get everything they wantCopy !req
65. but they don't even know
what they want,Copy !req
66. or what day it is,
or where they are,Copy !req
67. or who we are,
or what the fuck is going on.Copy !req
68. It looks like you got a dollop
of mayonnaise on your top, Lani.Copy !req
69. - What is that on your left tit?
- Oh, uh, I— I don't know.Copy !req
70. That's what I mean.Copy !req
71. Oh, God. Here they come.Copy !req
72. I mean, I just feel like
there's so many different trees.Copy !req
73. Shit. I don't know.
Just hold the tray up highCopy !req
74. and cover the stain on your boob.Copy !req
75. Just a little higher.
That's it.Copy !req
76. - Welcome.
- Thank you.Copy !req
77. Mr. and Mrs. Mossbacher. Hello.
I'm Armond, the resort manager.Copy !req
78. - Welcome to the White Lotus.
- Thank you.Copy !req
79. How was your journey here?Copy !req
80. - Long.
- Oh.Copy !req
81. - But honestly, fine.
- Happy to be here.Copy !req
82. The boat ride does add time
to the trip,Copy !req
83. but the views of the coastline
are magnificent, aren't they?Copy !req
84. - Incredible.
- Yeah.Copy !req
85. Simply a must for our VIPs
staying in the suites.Copy !req
86. Now, it's just a short ride in the
cart with Dillon to the hotel...Copy !req
87. and then we'll get you to your suite,
the Tradewinds, and you can freshen up.Copy !req
88. - Thank you, Armond.
- Of course.Copy !req
89. - Right this way.Copy !req
90. - Aloha.
- Aloha.Copy !req
91. - Masculine for you.
- Nuts. I'm nuts for nuts.Copy !req
92. I'm presuming Mr. Shane Patton
and Mrs. Rachel Patton?Copy !req
93. - Oh!
- That's us.Copy !req
94. Oh my God. Yes.Copy !req
95. - Is that not correct?
- No, it's correct.Copy !req
96. I'm just, um—
I'm getting used to it.Copy !req
97. We just got married
the day before yesterday.Copy !req
98. - Yeah.
- I am aware. Congratulations.Copy !req
99. - Yeah. Thanks. Um... Mrs. Patton. Wow.
- Yeah.Copy !req
100. Sounds so weird. Like, am I changing
my name? Is that...Copy !req
101. Well, how about we get you
a daiquiri before you makeCopy !req
102. - ... any major life decisions?
- Ooh, yes. Yes.Copy !req
103. Christie will be riding with you
back to the hotel.Copy !req
104. And she'll escort youCopy !req
105. - ... to the Palm Suite.
- Palm Suite.Copy !req
106. And I'm sure you will just love it.Copy !req
107. Okay.
Aloha, aloha.Copy !req
108. - Aloha.
- Aloha. Thank you.Copy !req
109. I'll check in with you
in a little while, okay?Copy !req
110. - Okay.
- Okay. Bye-bye.Copy !req
111. - Aloha.
- Are you Ms. MacQoowod?Copy !req
112. Quoid. One syllable.Copy !req
113. - MacWad?
- Well, two syllables,Copy !req
114. but the second part
is one syllable, "wad."Copy !req
115. MacQuoid.Copy !req
116. - Is it Gaelic?
- I don't know.Copy !req
117. I really don't know.
I— Just, listen, I—Copy !req
118. I'm in desperate need of a massage.Copy !req
119. Is that possible?
Is there anything available?Copy !req
120. I mean, I just—
I'd take anything right nowCopy !req
121. because I have a herniated disc
and I just...Copy !req
122. - Belinda behind you.
- Belinda behind me?Copy !req
123. Belinda, who is behind you,
is our spa manager.Copy !req
124. - Hi.
- Oh.Copy !req
125. Belinda, Ms. Macuhwad
is in need of treatment.Copy !req
126. Would you have any openings
for her this afternoon?Copy !req
127. Um... unfortunately,
we are all booked.Copy !req
128. Oh, no. I just— Really?Copy !req
129. Are you sure?
I would really appreciate it.Copy !req
130. I'm not picky. You know, if—Copy !req
131. I don't have to have
deep tissue or anything.Copy !req
132. I'd take anything at this point. Anything.Copy !req
133. Anything but reiki, of course.Copy !req
134. Um, you know what?
I'll see what we can do.Copy !req
135. - Really?
- Yeah.Copy !req
136. Okay. Thank you.Copy !req
137. Uh, Lani is our trainee.Copy !req
138. Um, Lani,
please ride with Ms. MacQuoidCopy !req
139. back to the hotel and bring her
up to the Hibiscus Suite.Copy !req
140. - Hibiscus.
- Okay. Thank you.Copy !req
141. - Aloha.
- Aloha. Thank you.Copy !req
142. Oh, there's a lobster bake tonight.Copy !req
143. - Oh.
- Lobster. Yum.Copy !req
144. - Hey.
- Hey.Copy !req
145. Let's get this honeymoon started.Copy !req
146. Oh, really?Copy !req
147. Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.Copy !req
148. What? What is it?Copy !req
149. - What's wrong?
- This is the wrong room.Copy !req
150. - What do you mean?
- Wh—Copy !req
151. We're supposed to be
in a honeymoon suite.Copy !req
152. This isn't the honeymoon suite. This...Copy !req
153. Maybe it is.
Why isn't it?Copy !req
154. No, 'cause I did
a virtual tour on the website.Copy !req
155. This is, uh, this isn't it.
This is just a regular suite.Copy !req
156. What are you talking about?Copy !req
157. This is like the swankiest
hotel room I've ever stayed in.Copy !req
158. Yeah, well, you haven't traveled
that much, so...Copy !req
159. Plus, we're paying
for the honeymoon suite.Copy !req
160. Hmm... technically,
we're not paying for anything.Copy !req
161. Your parents are.
I think it's fine, Shane.Copy !req
162. I mean, look, it's an amazing view.Copy !req
163. And we're near the restaurant.
And it's convenient.Copy !req
164. We can stuff ourselves
and go drown in the ocean.Copy !req
165. We're supposed to have our own
plunge pool and a private patio.Copy !req
166. There's a balcony.
There's another balcony.Copy !req
167. I mean, they screwed us on our room.Copy !req
168. Oh, Shane.
I wouldn't go that far.Copy !req
169. - Well...
- Just talk to the guy.Copy !req
170. Yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
171. Is it— is it a big deal?
Really?Copy !req
172. - Yeah.
- Yeah?Copy !req
173. - It's our once-in-a-lifetime honeymoon.
- Yeah.Copy !req
174. I just want it
to be perfect for you, baba.Copy !req
175. Mm, you're the sweetest.Copy !req
176. All right.
I'm gonna go talk to the guy.Copy !req
177. - Okay.
- Maybe a blowjob first?Copy !req
178. - What?
- What? We had a 12-hour flight.Copy !req
179. - I'm all horned up for you.
- Shane, stop.Copy !req
180. I'm gonna talk to this guy
with half a boner?Copy !req
181. - Stop it.
- All right, yeah.Copy !req
182. No, we'll save it
for the right room.Copy !req
183. - Yeah.
- All right.Copy !req
184. - Wait, I'm gonna come with you.
- Okay!Copy !req
185. Will you be needing anything else
at this time, ma'am?Copy !req
186. One thing. It's just,
uh, where are the bags?Copy !req
187. Right there. Right behind you.Copy !req
188. Oh. Right.
Of course.Copy !req
189. - Okay. Thank you.
- You're welcome.Copy !req
190. Wait, there's just, um, there—
there was one small bag.Copy !req
191. It's a small white plastic bag.Copy !req
192. That's the only one that's—
I don't see it here.Copy !req
193. Okay. A plastic bag?Copy !req
194. - A white— Yeah, it's very important.
- Plastic bag?Copy !req
195. Do you think they could have
left it on the— on the wheelie?Copy !req
196. Oh my God. Oh my God.
It has, uh— Oh my God.Copy !req
197. - I can call the bellman.
- Yeah, uh, I— no, yeah—Copy !req
198. It has my mother's ashes in it.Copy !req
199. - Oh! Oh.
- Oh my God.Copy !req
200. - Do you think it's lost?
- Oh, no, no, no.Copy !req
201. I took two boats.
We— If maybe you could callCopy !req
202. the boat— the boat people,
and then there was a—Copy !req
203. there was a little white—
a little golf cart thing.Copy !req
204. I don't think it had a trunk in it, but
maybe it was left on there, but I just—Copy !req
205. - No, I...
- Did the boat depart?Copy !req
206. Oh my God!
Oh my God.Copy !req
207. - Is this it?
- Thank you. Thank you.Copy !req
208. I just— That would
have been really bad.Copy !req
209. - Thank God. Thank you.
- Thank you.Copy !req
210. - I— I can't lose these.
- No.Copy !req
211. Mahalo.Copy !req
212. Oh my God.Copy !req
213. It's okay.Copy !req
214. Oh my God.Copy !req
215. The beach looks sick.
We should go.Copy !req
216. - Girls.
- Yeah, let's go.Copy !req
217. - Yeah?
- I would like to talk to you guysCopy !req
218. about, you know,
just some of this clutter,Copy !req
219. because this is gonna be
our common space,Copy !req
220. and I would love to try to,
you know, just clear it out.Copy !req
221. - I think I'll have an anxiety attack...
- Mom.Copy !req
222. - ... if I have to live in this.
- We can take care of it later.Copy !req
223. Well, you know what?
Let's take care of it now.Copy !req
224. Maybe we can find a good spot
to store everything.Copy !req
225. Quinn.
Why is your bed in here?Copy !req
226. Olivia said I have to sleep here.Copy !req
227. Olivia, your brother
is not sleeping in the kitchen.Copy !req
228. - Why not?
- Well, because it's a galley kitchen.Copy !req
229. It's tiny.Copy !req
230. And we've got
this whole beautiful room.Copy !req
231. Mom, he's doing fine in there.
Look, he's stimming.Copy !req
232. He can entertain himself for hours
with just his own hand gestures.Copy !req
233. - He's fine in the kitchen.
- Olivia, no.Copy !req
234. Mom, you want him sleeping
out here with us?Copy !req
235. He's gonna jerk off to Paula
while she's sleeping.Copy !req
236. I really don't feel like waking up
to that, Mrs. Mossbacher.Copy !req
237. Call me Nicole. And you do have
a beautiful body, Paula.Copy !req
238. - Mom.
- You have a beautiful body, too, Olivia.Copy !req
239. I just don't think
it's fair for your brotherCopy !req
240. to have to spend his entire
vacation in a windowless box.Copy !req
241. You got to bring a friend.Copy !req
242. And I'm so appreciative, Nicole.Copy !req
243. Well, we're so happy
to have you, Paula.Copy !req
244. I'm fine in here.Copy !req
245. See, Mom, he's fine.Copy !req
246. He's being himself,
gaming and fappingCopy !req
247. and bye, see you later.Copy !req
248. We're gonna take care
of this, honey.Copy !req
249. Shortly.Copy !req
250. Okay. It's okay.Copy !req
251. Gotta change my shirt.
I spilled...Copy !req
252. Okay.Copy !req
253. Hey, saw you called.Copy !req
254. Oh my God, Darrell,
the baby's coming or something.Copy !req
255. - No. No way.
- No— no, I swear.Copy !req
256. Baby.Copy !req
257. It— it hurts so freaking bad.
I don't know what to do.Copy !req
258. - Just come home then.
- No.Copy !req
259. No. I don't get off
for four more hours.Copy !req
260. Just come home, baby.Copy !req
261. I can't. I can't, okay?
Because— because—Copy !req
262. because no one even knows.
It's my first freaking day.Copy !req
263. It'll be fine, okay?
I'm here for you.Copy !req
264. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.
I gotta go. I gotta change.Copy !req
265. - Okay, pray for me, yeah?
- I will. I love you.Copy !req
266. - I love you.
- Hang in there, baby.Copy !req
267. I got this.Copy !req
268. Oh, you changed your uniform. Good.Copy !req
269. What was that anyway?
Was it tuna fish?Copy !req
270. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe.Copy !req
271. - Are you a messy eater or...
- Oh, no.Copy !req
272. I mean, it— it's beachy casual
but always presentable,Copy !req
273. you know, with a clean look.Copy !req
274. Clean.Copy !req
275. Oh, Mr. Patton
and Ms. Undecided.Copy !req
276. You finding everything
to your liking?Copy !req
277. Uh, actually, I think you put us
in the wrong room.Copy !req
278. We— we're supposed to be
in the honeymoon suite.Copy !req
279. Oh, there is no honeymoon suite.Copy !req
280. Well, uh, we're supposed to have
a plunge pool on a private patio.Copy !req
281. Oh, well, that would be the, uh,
the Pineapple Suite.Copy !req
282. - Okay.
- But...Copy !req
283. I— yeah, I don't have a—Copy !req
284. a record of you
booking that room, no.Copy !req
285. Uh, my mother sent a virtual tour.Copy !req
286. She booked the room.Copy !req
287. Uh, well, you're paying for
a presidential ocean view suite.Copy !req
288. Um, the Palm.
That's a very nice room.Copy !req
289. - Totally unique.
- Right.Copy !req
290. - It's really nice, yeah.
- But no plunge pool.Copy !req
291. But you still have
the infinity pool,Copy !req
292. the waterfall pool,
and the fountain pool.Copy !req
293. - Right.
- The Pineapple Suite,Copy !req
294. it has the private pool
but it doesn't have the ocean view.Copy !req
295. Um, I think the privacy
would be nice, right?Copy !req
296. I don't know.
Maybe I should call my mother?Copy !req
297. Do you wanna call your mother?
What do you think she'll say?Copy !req
298. I think she's gonna say
we're in the wrong room, but...Copy !req
299. Well, the Pineapple Suite
isn't available, I'm afraid, anyway.Copy !req
300. - Oh, it's not?
- There's a German couple staying there.Copy !req
301. They also just got married.Copy !req
302. - So... it is a honeymoon suite.
- Shane.Copy !req
303. - No, I just—
- It's not that big of a deal.Copy !req
304. I mean, the room is really—
It's gorgeous.Copy !req
305. Oh, well,
the Palm is everyone's favorite.Copy !req
306. I prefer the Palm to the Pineapple.Copy !req
307. - Don't you, Lani?
- Palm, yeah. The Palm.Copy !req
308. - Uh-huh.
- Okay. Um...Copy !req
309. All right.
That's a bummer.Copy !req
310. I saw the virtual tour of it,
and it's...Copy !req
311. We're definitely not
paying for the more expensive room?Copy !req
312. - No.
- Right?Copy !req
313. I mean, yes, you are not.Copy !req
314. Okay.Copy !req
315. - Um, hi.
- Hi.Copy !req
316. Is there anything else
I can help you with, or...Copy !req
317. No, that's...Copy !req
318. - Thank you. Thanks.
- Of course.Copy !req
319. I think I might've fucked up
and double booked the Pineapple Suite.Copy !req
320. But, you know, hopefully
they'll just get over it.Copy !req
321. See, in situations like that,
just always stay positive.Copy !req
322. Remind these people of—Copy !req
323. of all the fabulous things
they already possess.Copy !req
324. Unique room, ocean view.Copy !req
325. You have to treat these people
like sensitive children.Copy !req
326. They always say it's about
the money, but it's not.Copy !req
327. It's not even about the room.
They just need to feel seen.Copy !req
328. - Seen.
- They wanna be the only child.Copy !req
329. The special, chosen baby child
of the hotel.Copy !req
330. And we are their mean mummies,Copy !req
331. denying them
their Pineapple room.Copy !req
332. I, uh...Copy !req
333. - Are they bigger?
- I don't know, you tell me.Copy !req
334. - I haven't seen them in a while.
- Nicole, they're fucking huge.Copy !req
335. Huh.
I wonder what's going on.Copy !req
336. It's cancer.
I have testicle cancer.Copy !req
337. We don't know that yet.
We have not gotten the results.Copy !req
338. - Shouldn't we be getting those?
- Tomorrow.Copy !req
339. - Well, wait. Isn't tomorrow now?
- No. Tomorrow.Copy !req
340. No. I know. But tomorrow there
is what here?Copy !req
341. - No. It's still tomorrow.
- Okay. Well, you know,Copy !req
342. he said that it could be
a lot of other things.Copy !req
343. No. He said that
it maybe could be other things.Copy !req
344. And there's not a lot of
other things it could be, right?Copy !req
345. I mean, uh,
it's not a family of miceCopy !req
346. that burrowed inside
my ball sack. It's cancer.Copy !req
347. - Or maybe even something worse.
- Well,Copy !req
348. let's just wait
and hear what he has to say.Copy !req
349. - Let's not, you know...
- It's cancer!Copy !req
350. - It's cancer.
- Why are you so sure?Copy !req
351. Nic, my dad died of cancer
and he was only 46 years old.Copy !req
352. It wasn't testicular cancer, was it?Copy !req
353. I don't— Wait.
I don't even know.Copy !req
354. You know what? I should call
my Uncle Charlie and find out.Copy !req
355. It's just... so disturbingCopy !req
356. that it's in my balls,
and that they get big like this.Copy !req
357. It's very Gogol.Copy !req
358. Mark, whatever it is,
you're gonna be fine.Copy !req
359. People get cancer.
They deal with it.Copy !req
360. It's not like it was
when your dad had it.Copy !req
361. And you know what? They're making
breakthroughs every day.Copy !req
362. It's like a nonstop parade
of progress.Copy !req
363. You know what?
This is terrible timing.Copy !req
364. Coming here was nuts.Copy !req
365. Look at your son.
He's sitting in there alone.Copy !req
366. He looks like he's killing time
in a waiting roomCopy !req
367. before a root canal.
Go get him. Go have some fun.Copy !req
368. Nic...Copy !req
369. Quinn is the exact age
I was when my dad died.Copy !req
370. Well, then all the more reason
to pay him a little attention now...Copy !req
371. while you're still with us.Copy !req
372. Come on.
Get out of the closet.Copy !req
373. - Hey!
- Hey.Copy !req
374. All right.
Let's go out and explore.Copy !req
375. - What do you mean?
- Let's get off the phone,Copy !req
376. and let's go have some fun, okay?Copy !req
377. This is nature.Copy !req
378. Nature, Quinn.
Quinn, nature.Copy !req
379. - Well...
- Yeah?Copy !req
380. - All right.
- All right. Get your suit on.Copy !req
381. - Oh, hey.
- Hi.Copy !req
382. - Do you remember me?
- Yes.Copy !req
383. Any luck squeezing me in today?Copy !req
384. All of our masseuses
are fully booked.Copy !req
385. - Sorry.
- Oh.Copy !req
386. But I actually have some
free time right now, myself.Copy !req
387. Oh.Copy !req
388. Here's what I'm thinking, Tanya.
We could do a consultation.Copy !req
389. That way I can get a better sense of
what's going on with you and your body.Copy !req
390. And I could give you
a cranial sacral,Copy !req
391. - ... which I always recommend.
- So, no massage?Copy !req
392. I think you'll find this
really cathartic.Copy !req
393. Will I be fully naked?Copy !req
394. Oh, no. We'll put you
in a bathrobeCopy !req
395. so you're comfortable
and we can do a little movement.Copy !req
396. - Okay?
- Okay.Copy !req
397. - Okay. Right this way.
- Thank you.Copy !req
398. Hi!Copy !req
399. Hi.Copy !req
400. I saw you guys on the boat
and on the plane.Copy !req
401. - Uh, where are you from?
- New York.Copy !req
402. - What neighborhood?
- Um, East Village.Copy !req
403. But I'm letting go of my place.
I'm gonna move into Shane's—Copy !req
404. my husband's—
my husband's name is Shane.Copy !req
405. - Where'd you meet him?
- Through friends.Copy !req
406. Oh, not Raya?Copy !req
407. Raya? No.
Not Raya.Copy !req
408. How long
was the engagement?Copy !req
409. We actually just met last September.Copy !req
410. Oh, wow. That was really fast.Copy !req
411. Yeah. Like, how'd you know
he was the one?Copy !req
412. Oh, I don't know, um...
the chemistry was there, and...Copy !req
413. - His dick's not small.
- Yeah.Copy !req
414. I don't know. Shane really wanted
to get married,Copy !req
415. and he's very decisiveCopy !req
416. and pretty convincing,
so it just felt right.Copy !req
417. - Yeah. What does he do?
- He's in real estate.Copy !req
418. Uh, that's what his father does.Copy !req
419. Oh, he works for his father?Copy !req
420. - What do you do?
- I'm a— I'm a journalist.Copy !req
421. Mostly profiles and, um—Copy !req
422. - Where'd you go to school?
- SUNY Potsdam.Copy !req
423. - Hmm.
- Uh, and then I...Copy !req
424. I moved to the city
to change the worldCopy !req
425. and make a name for myself
and pay off my loans.Copy !req
426. All of which I have yet to do, so...Copy !req
427. Won't he pay off your loans?Copy !req
428. Shane? I—Copy !req
429. - But he could?
- Well, uh, yes. Yeah.Copy !req
430. Yeah, he could.Copy !req
431. Yeah, of course,
'cause he's super rich.Copy !req
432. Well, his family is wealthy
compared to my family—Copy !req
433. I mean, compared
to most families. Yeah.Copy !req
434. I mean...
it sounds like you scored.Copy !req
435. Yeah. He's super hot. Congrats.Copy !req
436. Do you two go to school together?Copy !req
437. What year are you in?Copy !req
438. - Sophomores.
- Sophomores.Copy !req
439. And your mom—
um, I'm assuming it's your mom.Copy !req
440. She looks really familiar.
Is she— Um, what does she do?Copy !req
441. Her mom's the CFO of POOF.Copy !req
442. Oh, yeah.
That's Nicole Mossbacher.Copy !req
443. That's your mom?
I actually wrote a profile on her.Copy !req
444. Well, it was repurposing
someone else's profile,Copy !req
445. but, um, it was like...Copy !req
446. "Ten Women Kicking
the Corporate World's Ass,"Copy !req
447. - ... you know? That kind of thing.
- Yeah.Copy !req
448. She's a big deal.Copy !req
449. Okay.
Well, it was nice to meet you.Copy !req
450. Oh, shit.Copy !req
451. - Uh, I— I, uh— uh— I think I—
- Lani, are you all right?Copy !req
452. - You're white as a sheet.
- I should— I should sit down.Copy !req
453. Well, we can't have you
sitting in the lobby.Copy !req
454. Just go and have a rest
in my office.Copy !req
455. - Okay.
- Food poisoning, you think?Copy !req
456. - Maybe the tuna?
- Yeah, tuna.Copy !req
457. Oh, Mr. Mossbacher.
How can I help you?Copy !req
458. Uh, my son and I were looking
to do some kind of activity.Copy !req
459. Wonderful.
Of course. Fantastic.Copy !req
460. And I thought it would be fun
to try scuba diving.Copy !req
461. Yes.
A few reefs are still thriving.Copy !req
462. Do you have your PADI license?Copy !req
463. PADI license?
No. What is that?Copy !req
464. No, I don't.Copy !req
465. Then that would be impossible.Copy !req
466. Uh, you can get your
accreditation here, though,Copy !req
467. - ... in the pool.
- Great.Copy !req
468. Takes three days.Copy !req
469. How about... water skiing?Copy !req
470. Yes. Very fun.Copy !req
471. Uh, the swells are too great
right now, unfortunately.Copy !req
472. We just had a hurricane
pass through,Copy !req
473. so it's a bit biblical out there.Copy !req
474. - That's too bad.
- Yeah. Maybe later in the week.Copy !req
475. How about jet skiing?Copy !req
476. Same. Swells.
It's a liability issue.Copy !req
477. Mm-hmm. Um... surf lessons?Copy !req
478. Well, the surfing team leaves
first thing in the morning.Copy !req
479. I can sign you up for tomorrow,
6:00 a.m.?Copy !req
480. 6:00 a.m.? No way.Copy !req
481. Um, I don't know.Copy !req
482. What— what would
you suggest that we do?Copy !req
483. Well, I would suggest
snorkeling in the bay.Copy !req
484. You know, there's not
too many fish in the afternoon,Copy !req
485. but you'll definitely see something.Copy !req
486. And you can get your masks
and fins and thingsCopy !req
487. - ... at the beach shack.
- Are there sharks?Copy !req
488. They are actually a family of sharksCopy !req
489. that hang out in the bay,
but they're quite small.Copy !req
490. Like this big.
They're cute.Copy !req
491. Okay.Copy !req
492. - Yeah, let's do it.
- Cool.Copy !req
493. Enjoy yourselves.Copy !req
494. And I'll see you tonight
at the lobster bake.Copy !req
495. Yup.Copy !req
496. Oh. God.
What is this?Copy !req
497. Can somebody clean
this up, please? Dillon?Copy !req
498. What I'm hearing is
you're having a lot of fatigue.Copy !req
499. Yeah.Copy !req
500. I feel like taking a nap right now.Copy !req
501. Why do you think you're so tired?Copy !req
502. I think it's 'cause I'm so close
to the floor.Copy !req
503. In general.Copy !req
504. Well... my mom passed away
in June.Copy !req
505. I'm so sorry.Copy !req
506. Just dealing with all the logistics,Copy !req
507. you know, of it all. It's—
it was just exhausting.Copy !req
508. And I'm still dealing with it.Copy !req
509. You know, my mother...Copy !req
510. I have her ashes, you know.Copy !req
511. I brought them here, and I was—
you know—Copy !req
512. I was gonna scatter them
in the ocean,Copy !req
513. 'cause she loved the ocean,
but I— I don't— I— I don't even—Copy !req
514. I don't even know
where I'm gonna scatter them.Copy !req
515. My mother actually passed away
a few years ago,Copy !req
516. and, you know...
I'm still grieving.Copy !req
517. - I'm still working through it.
- Oh.Copy !req
518. Nobody loves you like your mother.Copy !req
519. Yeah.Copy !req
520. But... my mother, she's—Copy !req
521. She was, um...Copy !req
522. She was just...Copy !req
523. Yeah.Copy !req
524. My love life is a ruin.Copy !req
525. I've driven away every man that...
I've ever been involved with,Copy !req
526. 'cause you know, I just—
I get— I—Copy !req
527. I just, you know,
I get too attached.Copy !req
528. And they don't like that.Copy !req
529. I just—Copy !req
530. I can't get rid of this,
like— this—Copy !req
531. this really empty feeling.Copy !req
532. I want—Copy !req
533. I want someone
to figure it out for me.Copy !req
534. Why don't we
try something, okay?Copy !req
535. Will you trust me?Copy !req
536. Okay.Copy !req
537. Wow.Copy !req
538. Boy, you know, this feels nice.Copy !req
539. - Tanya?
- Mm-hmm.Copy !req
540. - I want you to repeat after me, okay?
- Okay.Copy !req
541. - Every moment...
- Every moment...Copy !req
542. I'm being born
into this life.Copy !req
543. - I will drop the story...
- I will drop the story...Copy !req
544. and feel the newness
of each moment.Copy !req
545. I am my own phallic mother.Copy !req
546. I'm my own phallic mother.Copy !req
547. I'm my own vaginal father.Copy !req
548. My own vaginal father?Copy !req
549. I fill my own cup.Copy !req
550. My failing body is immaterial.Copy !req
551. The child in me is alive
and fresh as the day I was born.Copy !req
552. is immaterial
because the child in me isCopy !req
553. as fresh as the day it was born.Copy !req
554. I will connect
with that child at all timesCopy !req
555. and feed and nurture her.Copy !req
556. I will connect with that child
at all timesCopy !req
557. and feed and nurture her.Copy !req
558. You don't have to do this part.Copy !req
559. I know, but I like it, okay?Copy !req
560. I know. I'll just—
It's a Hindu chant...Copy !req
561. - Okay.
- ... so just listen...Copy !req
562. - ... and breathe.
- I love it.Copy !req
563. What are you doing?Copy !req
564. Why do you keep looking
at your dick?Copy !req
565. I'm not.
I'm looking at my balls.Copy !req
566. I'm gonna go in.Copy !req
567. Aren't you afraid of sharks?Copy !req
568. It's just...Copy !req
569. - Hey.
- Where'd you go?Copy !req
570. To the pool.Copy !req
571. You know those girls from the boat,
the young ones?Copy !req
572. They made me feel, like,
really, really weird just now.Copy !req
573. - Baba.
- What?Copy !req
574. The guy lied.Copy !req
575. I mean, that or he's just stupid
or something.Copy !req
576. We did book the room with the pool,
and we paid for it.Copy !req
577. My mom forwarded me the booking.Copy !req
578. - Shane!
- What?Copy !req
579. I'm not gonna let him ruin
our honeymoon.Copy !req
580. No. But he's not. You are.Copy !req
581. Like, let's just enjoy this room.
It's nice.Copy !req
582. Just forget about the other room.Copy !req
583. But we paid for it.Copy !req
584. - Get over yourself.
- Get over myself?Copy !req
585. Get over it. Like, why are we even
thinking about this?Copy !req
586. Let's just enjoy
our honeymoon, you know?Copy !req
587. There's no problem.Copy !req
588. Oh my God. Baba.Copy !req
589. - What?
- It's our first marital spat.Copy !req
590. Is that what you want?
Are you looking for fights?Copy !req
591. Not with you. I'm not fighting.Copy !req
592. Just come here. Come over here.
Come here.Copy !req
593. I won't mention it again.
I'll take care of it. Okay?Copy !req
594. I just want you have the best.
The best.Copy !req
595. Okay.Copy !req
596. Okay.Copy !req
597. Yeah. Today at 3:00?Copy !req
598. Oh, yeah. Let me take a look.
We can—Copy !req
599. Of course, we can do the massage,Copy !req
600. and then we can follow that with
the scrub. We can do the wrap too.Copy !req
601. Unfortunately, we can't do
the scrubs in the room.Copy !req
602. We have a water room for that.Copy !req
603. Okay. Great.
We'll get you in for that.Copy !req
604. And then,
you also wanted a wrap too?Copy !req
605. We'll do that at 3:00,
massage, followed by scrub,Copy !req
606. followed by the wrap. And you also...
Yes, yes, yes.Copy !req
607. - We can absolutely do a facial.
- I loved it.Copy !req
608. - Loved it.
- The exfoliating facial is intensive.Copy !req
609. It's about an hour and a half,
so we can, um...Copy !req
610. Oh, no. Absolutely.Copy !req
611. We can take the whole block
of time if you want.Copy !req
612. - Anything good?
- No. Not really.Copy !req
613. I saw... a lot of seaweed.
It was... pretty gross.Copy !req
614. Yeah.Copy !req
615. What?Copy !req
616. Ah, I'm just thinking.Copy !req
617. Being a man, being a young man...Copy !req
618. in this time right now,
can't be easy.Copy !req
619. Why? 'Cause we can't harass
girls anymore?Copy !req
620. No.Copy !req
621. Well, yeah.Copy !req
622. I don't know. I don't know,
the modern world todayCopy !req
623. is just so... emasculating.Copy !req
624. You mean, like, we're cucked?Copy !req
625. Yeah.Copy !req
626. Unless you're a fireman
or something.Copy !req
627. You know, I think...
it's like every kid...Copy !req
628. like, growing up, wants to be
the hero of the story.Copy !req
629. And in the end...Copy !req
630. you know, you're just happy
you're not the villain.Copy !req
631. You know what I'm saying?Copy !req
632. Is this about mom
making more money than you?Copy !req
633. No. It's not about that.
What?Copy !req
634. Sorry. Sorry.Copy !req
635. I'm just...Copy !req
636. I'm proud of you, Quinn.
That's all.Copy !req
637. Thanks.Copy !req
638. And I just hope that you,
like, think of me...Copy !req
639. and... remember this time...
in a positive way.Copy !req
640. Okay.Copy !req
641. I love you.Copy !req
642. I love you, too.Copy !req
643. If you like pineapple, the
soufflé will knock your socks off.Copy !req
644. That's my tip for tonight.Copy !req
645. Enjoy yourselves, lovebirds.Copy !req
646. How are you tonight, people?Copy !req
647. - Oh, good, thanks.
- Good to see you.Copy !req
648. Like she actually cared
about the working poor.Copy !req
649. She was a neoliberal war hawk.Copy !req
650. She was a neolib and a neocon.Copy !req
651. I'm sorry.
Did you say Hillary Clinton?Copy !req
652. - Something about Hillary Clinton?
- Nothing, Mom.Copy !req
653. Oh. Oh, is that the trendy thing
they're teaching now,Copy !req
654. to hate on Hillary Clinton?Copy !req
655. Mom, don't get triggered.Copy !req
656. Hillary Clinton is one
of the most influential womenCopy !req
657. of the last 30 years,
and many women in my generationCopy !req
658. very much admire Hillary Clinton.Copy !req
659. Okay. Don't worry about it, Mom.
We all love Hillary Clinton.Copy !req
660. How was the snorkeling?Copy !req
661. - Did you see the little sharks?
- Nope. Didn't see much.Copy !req
662. No? Well, go first thing
in the morning,Copy !req
663. take a little bread,
and they'll swim right up to you.Copy !req
664. It's like a Disney movie.Copy !req
665. A slightly scary Disney movie.Copy !req
666. Oh. Excuse me.Copy !req
667. What? What is it?Copy !req
668. Lani is in your office,
having a baby.Copy !req
669. - What? Who's Lani?
- The trainee.Copy !req
670. What do you mean
she's having a baby?Copy !req
671. She is in labor.Copy !req
672. Lani, the trainee, is having a baby
in my office? That's not possible.Copy !req
673. Well, it's happening.Copy !req
674. - Oh, fuck.
- Uh, Armond.Copy !req
675. Oh my gosh. I have to tell you
something. I have to tell you.Copy !req
676. I had the most
amazing treatment today.Copy !req
677. You know, I've had a lot
of treatments in this lifetime.Copy !req
678. And I swear to God,
the one that I had todayCopy !req
679. was probably the best treatment
I've ever had. It was incredible.Copy !req
680. - It really was.
- Sorry, madam. I'm needed in the office.Copy !req
681. Okay, but listen. Listen, I have
a massage scheduled for tomorrow.Copy !req
682. And, um, I want to request Belinda.Copy !req
683. - Belinda is the best.
- I'll make a note.Copy !req
684. - Can you help me with that?
- I'll make a note.Copy !req
685. All right.Copy !req
686. - God!
- Lani, what's going on?Copy !req
687. Why didn't you tell me
you were pregnant?Copy !req
688. I'm sorry.
I needed work, okay? I—Copy !req
689. You— you can't have a baby
the first day on the job.Copy !req
690. I didn't know. She's early.
Oh, she's early.Copy !req
691. Well, do you have a doctor.
Lani?Copy !req
692. Dr. Rezz is on his way.Copy !req
693. But he is coming from
the other side of the island.Copy !req
694. - Oh my God.
- He'll be here.Copy !req
695. Somebody should get Belinda up here.Copy !req
696. Seems like she might have dabbled
in midwifery.Copy !req
697. Yeah. M— maybe
one of the guests is a doctor?Copy !req
698. What? I'm supposed to walk
around the lobster bake, Dillon?Copy !req
699. "Is there a doctor? Our trainee
is having a baby in the lobby." Idiot!Copy !req
700. It's like the only activity
they have here.Copy !req
701. What are you doing?
Stop. That's embarrassing.Copy !req
702. - I'm helping.
- Mom, what the fuck?Copy !req
703. Lobster is very tough.
It's very tough.Copy !req
704. Oh, it hurts.
I can't!Copy !req
705. - Oh God, oh God, oh God.
- You're okay.Copy !req
706. I'm gonna go back up to the room.Copy !req
707. Thank you.Copy !req
708. Hey, I bet those are the German
fuckers that got our room.Copy !req
709. What?Copy !req
710. That's all right.Copy !req
711. - You look beautiful.
- Thank you.Copy !req
712. - Sir! Hey, sir. Hey.
- Y— yes?Copy !req
713. Um, I have an email here...
uh, about the booking.Copy !req
714. Can I talk to you about this
in just a minute?Copy !req
715. Uh, yeah. No problem.
Yeah. Whenever.Copy !req
716. Or never. It's all good.
It's all good.Copy !req
717. Thank God I caught you.Copy !req
718. - What's going on?
- I have no idea what to do.Copy !req
719. Oh, hey. Hi. Hey.Copy !req
720. Hey— Wait— Belinda. Belinda.Copy !req
721. Belinda, it's me.Copy !req
722. To... the adventure of a lifetime.Copy !req
723. There's no one
I'd rather be doing it with.Copy !req
724. Cheers.Copy !req
725. You're doing great, Lani, okay?
Breathe for me.Copy !req
726. You gotta breathe.
Give me your eyes.Copy !req
727. Breathe deep in, okay?
In. Out.Copy !req
728. Hey. Doctor's here.Copy !req
729. Oh, thank God.Copy !req
730. - Hey, Lani, I'm Dr. Rezz.
- Thank you.Copy !req
731. - We're here to take care of you.
- Thank you, thank you.Copy !req
732. Let me get some gloves,
check your vitals real quick.Copy !req
733. - It hurts so bad.
- How far apart are your contractions?Copy !req
734. - Two minutes.
- Two minutes?Copy !req
735. I just thought she was chunky.Copy !req
736. You know, the poor woman
was having a babyCopy !req
737. and I... I didn't even notice.Copy !req
738. Fuck.Copy !req
739. - Did you think that guy was hot?
- What guy?Copy !req
740. That guy you were gawking at
by the tiki torches.Copy !req
741. I don't remember seeing a guy
by the tiki torches.Copy !req
742. Quinn, what are you doing in there?
Are you fapping?Copy !req
743. Fuck off!Copy !req
744. Shit. Nicole, it's the doctor.Copy !req
745. I told you, today is tomorrow.
Answer it.Copy !req
746. Hello.Copy !req
747. - Mark Mossbacher?
- This is he.Copy !req
748. Hi, do you have
a minute for the doctor?Copy !req
749. Yeah. Of course.Copy !req
750. Okay. One second.
I'll put him right on.Copy !req
751. He's calling me first thing.Copy !req
752. Don't read into it.Copy !req
753. - I'm so sorry, Mark. I just lost him.
- What?Copy !req
754. Can we call you back
in a few minutes?Copy !req
755. Hey, I'm on vacation.
It's very late here.Copy !req
756. Can you just please get him back?Copy !req
757. I'm so sorry.
It'll just be a few minutes.Copy !req
758. I promise. Call you right back.Copy !req
759. - Okay.
- Okay. Thanks.Copy !req
760. It's gonna be okay, Mark.Copy !req
761. It's— it's gonna be good news.Copy !req
762. Good things happen to good people.Copy !req
763. We're married.Copy !req
764. We're on our honeymoon.Copy !req
765. Yeah. Yep.Copy !req
766. I'm happy.Copy !req
767. Yeah. Me, too.Copy !req
768. I just hope that we don't becomeCopy !req
769. like one of those
old, depressing couplesCopy !req
770. with all this baggage
and resentment and regrets.Copy !req
771. And...Copy !req
772. I just hope it always stays
this way, you know?Copy !req
773. Yeah. It will, baba.Copy !req
774. - Promise?
- Yeah.Copy !req
775. Come here.Copy !req
776. We are always gonna feel like this.Copy !req
777. We will always be young.Copy !req
778. And we will always be in love.Copy !req
779. And there will be days
and days just like this.Copy !req
780. - Okay?
- Okay.Copy !req