1. Previously on The West Wing:Copy !req
2. You know the thing
with guys like you?Copy !req
3. What's the thing
about guys like me?Copy !req
4. You wanna get hit over the head.Copy !req
5. - I have to go.
- We'll see you.Copy !req
6. I went to rehab. My friends
embraced me when I got out.Copy !req
7. You relapse, it's not like that.Copy !req
8. It's like,"Get away from me."Copy !req
9. - Mr. McGarry, the date Jed Bartlet was...
- No, I'm sorry.Copy !req
10. I'm going to resume
this after the holidays.Copy !req
11. - What?
- That concludes our...Copy !req
12. questioning. We'll pick it up
when the chairman...Copy !req
13. gavels the hearings to order.Copy !req
14. - Good evening.
- Good evening.Copy !req
15. - What are the police doing outside?
- The door?Copy !req
16. - Yeah.
- That's the Capitol Police.Copy !req
17. I know. What are they doing?Copy !req
18. - I didn't ask for them.
- Who did?Copy !req
19. Would you prefer they went away?Copy !req
20. If you offer a deal, I'd prefer there
not be armed guards to intimidate him.Copy !req
21. - I'm not that easily intimidated.
- I am.Copy !req
22. The chairman put them there
to ensure our privacy.Copy !req
23. - Tell them to wait at the end of the hall.
- Counsel?Copy !req
24. Excuse me, officer.Copy !req
25. They've stepped
to the other side of the hall.Copy !req
26. - Cliff.
- Want me to overpower them?Copy !req
27. I don't care if the police are there,
someone speak.Copy !req
28. Yeah. Mr. McGarry...Copy !req
29. this conversation's off the record,
see nobody's taking it down.Copy !req
30. You mean what you're about to say
or the five minutes on the Capitol Police?Copy !req
31. - The whole thing.
- Okay.Copy !req
32. Congressman Gibson.Copy !req
33. - Yeah.
- Know where his testimony was going?Copy !req
34. - Yes.
- And where it'll pick up?Copy !req
35. - Yes.
- We're willing to end the hearings now.Copy !req
36. - End his testimony?
- His testimony. The first lady's.Copy !req
37. The balance of the witness list. The
hearings. We're willing to end them now.Copy !req
38. - In exchange for...?
- A joint resolution. HR 172.Copy !req
39. Censure.Copy !req
40. A resolution condemning
the president for lying...Copy !req
41. - He didn't lie.
- Leo.Copy !req
42. lying to the American people.Copy !req
43. The White House can't object.
It has to welcome the resolution...Copy !req
44. and let any Democrat
who wants to, vote in favor.Copy !req
45. You say White House.
You mean the president.Copy !req
46. - Yeah.
- Why aren't you talking to the president?Copy !req
47. If you suggest it,
it'll carry more weight...Copy !req
48. than if it comes
from the chairman or the speaker.Copy !req
49. - Yeah?
- Yes, sir.Copy !req
50. Okay, well.Copy !req
51. I'll just call the president
and suggest to him...Copy !req
52. he allow
a huge bipartisan vote...Copy !req
53. on the floor of the House
of Representatives calling him a liar...Copy !req
54. and that he welcome the result.Copy !req
55. Then, I'm gonna flap my wings
and fly to Neverland.Copy !req
56. - Leo.
- You think I'm so desperate...Copy !req
57. to save my ass I'm gonna
roll over on Jed Bartlet?Copy !req
58. I take a bullet for the president.
He doesn't take one for me.Copy !req
59. Is that all you got?Copy !req
60. - Yeah.
- Good night.Copy !req
61. Can you give me some time?Copy !req
62. One day.Copy !req
63. - I've got copies.
- Have you read it?Copy !req
64. - Bits and pieces.
- How is it?Copy !req
65. I'm gonna set up
a war room downstairs.Copy !req
66. - It's serious?
- Yeah.Copy !req
67. - I'm up!
- This is The Camera Doesn 't Lie:Copy !req
68. What I Saw at the Bartlet
White House, by Ron Burkhalt.Copy !req
69. - You read it?
- Bits and pieces.Copy !req
70. - How is it?
- I'm setting up a war room.Copy !req
71. - It's serious?
- How many times do we have to do this?Copy !req
72. - I'm up.
- We're each taking a couple of chapters.Copy !req
73. This is based on what?Copy !req
74. - Going through the index.
- So presumably...Copy !req
75. the chapters you've been assigned
are about you. If not, trade.Copy !req
76. What we're doing is making
note of anything that's wrong.Copy !req
77. - Anything to attack credibility.
- I see one.Copy !req
78. - What?
- I'm Larry, he's Ed.Copy !req
79. I usually don't know that.Copy !req
80. Sam? Are we taking this too seriously?Copy !req
81. - No.
- He was a photographer. He was fired.Copy !req
82. - My recollection is he was a buffoon.
- He was a buffoon.Copy !req
83. Which has always stopped the public
from taking something seriously.Copy !req
84. - What are you saying?
- The book's in stores in three weeks.Copy !req
85. In a week, the press'll have excerpts and
we have to turn him into a punch line.Copy !req
86. "Bartlet played a round of golf
with Toby Ziegler...Copy !req
87. the prickly communications director,
whose inner darkness...Copy !req
88. spelled the breakup of
the one marriage we know about."Copy !req
89. It was miniature golf, wasn't it?Copy !req
90. - Sam, got anything else?
- No. Thank you.Copy !req
91. - Toby?
- Yeah.Copy !req
92. - Listen, you know Amy Gardner, right?
- Women's Leadership Coalition?Copy !req
93. I've known her a while. She went
out with my roommate in college.Copy !req
94. I saw her about some language
in the Vienna treaty.Copy !req
95. - I remember.
- Mrs. Bartlet sent me there.Copy !req
96. - Yeah.
- I don't know, she's changed her hair...Copy !req
97. or something. Something's going on.Copy !req
98. What do you need?Copy !req
99. Well, I'm a straight shooter.Copy !req
100. - I think my record's clear on that.
- Yeah.Copy !req
101. I'd like to see her again.Copy !req
102. - Call her.
- And ask her out?Copy !req
103. - Yeah.
- No. There's the potential...Copy !req
104. she says no
and I have to move someplace...Copy !req
105. where it'll never be spoken of again.
I need to go under the cover of business.Copy !req
106. - You're a straight shooter.
- Yeah. I need friction.Copy !req
107. An issue where feministas and the White
House disagree. I can go to her...Copy !req
108. break the bad news,
stand tough, smooth it over.Copy !req
109. - Then I take it from there.
- How about the word'feministas"?Copy !req
110. You do outreach to women's
groups on the State of the Union.Copy !req
111. - They're happy.
- Very happy?Copy !req
112. - Yeah.
- With the surplus projections changing?Copy !req
113. Women are getting a decent break.Copy !req
114. Damn. Where are the pro-lifers
when you need them?Copy !req
115. - Don't they know you're trying to get...
- This is not that.Copy !req
116. She's got... I really...
I'm bewitched. I'm ensorcelled.Copy !req
117. There's gotta be some
way we're screwing them over.Copy !req
118. There's an anti-family planning
amendment...Copy !req
119. on a foreign ops supplemental.
- It's dead.Copy !req
120. - Pay Equity Act?
- They're the ones who want to wait.Copy !req
121. - Cancer screenings through Medicare?
- Fully funded. Head Start's okay.Copy !req
122. - Paid family leave?
- It's a dream.Copy !req
123. - They don't wanna waste capital.
- We can't compromise like that.Copy !req
124. - They want us to compromise.
- They should be outraged.Copy !req
125. They want a study funded.Copy !req
126. - How much did we give them?
- Almost everything they asked.Copy !req
127. - Almost?
- They wanted 21 million.Copy !req
128. They're getting 20.5.Copy !req
129. Well, that's practically an insult.Copy !req
130. Okay. Paid family leave.
There it is.Copy !req
131. - Yeah, I'd go with paid family leave.
- Paid family leave. There it is. Okay.Copy !req
132. - Hey.
- Yeah?Copy !req
133. Listen.Copy !req
134. Come here.Copy !req
135. You're inside, right?Copy !req
136. On what?Copy !req
137. Leo?Copy !req
138. You were nervous when he
took the stand before the break.Copy !req
139. So was the president.Copy !req
140. Then they called the recess.Copy !req
141. I don't know what was going on.Copy !req
142. That's the way somebody wants it,
but you're inside, right?Copy !req
143. Yeah.Copy !req
144. Good.Copy !req
145. If it's something Communications
is gonna have to work with... .Copy !req
146. The lawyers are talking about it.Copy !req
147. - When I have to know, I will?
- Yeah.Copy !req
148. Okay.Copy !req
149. Paid family leave.Copy !req
150. - Charlie.
- Good morning.Copy !req
151. - How was your weekend?
- Good.Copy !req
152. - What did you do?
- Most of the time I was with you.Copy !req
153. Time well spent.Copy !req
154. - Weren't you going to a flea market?
- I got you something.Copy !req
155. - You didn't have to do that.
- Yeah?Copy !req
156. It's a map of the Holy Land
that was drawn in 1709.Copy !req
157. It's titled'Canaan,
Palestine or The Holy Land."Copy !req
158. - Hey, nice sucking up.
- Thank you, sir.Copy !req
159. Look at these topographical details.Copy !req
160. Seriously, I'm gonna have this framed,
this is great.Copy !req
161. - If you leave it, I'll send it out.
- No, I'll play with it more.Copy !req
162. - Good morning.
- Look at this map, 1709.Copy !req
163. The Dead Sea, Jordan River,
Mount Sinai.Copy !req
164. That's beautiful.Copy !req
165. - You wanna come inside?
- Yeah.Copy !req
166. Thanks again, Charlie.Copy !req
167. How'd it go?Copy !req
168. - Last night?
- Yeah.Copy !req
169. It was nothing.Copy !req
170. - What did they offer?
- Nothing.Copy !req
171. - They didn't offer nothing.
- It was a nonstarter, don't worry.Copy !req
172. - Censure?
- Yeah.Copy !req
173. Anyway, I'm gonna go to a budget
meeting where the OMB and Treasury...Copy !req
174. will recommend we drop the Child
Poverty Fund...Copy !req
175. from the State of the Union.
- Well, I get it.Copy !req
176. See what you can do about it.Copy !req
177. - Anything else?
- No.Copy !req
178. - I've got a security briefing downstairs.
- Thank you.Copy !req
179. Hi.Copy !req
180. - Remember me?
- Margaret!Copy !req
181. - I was with you at last night's meeting.
- Yes.Copy !req
182. When you left, I wasn't with you.Copy !req
183. - Yes.
- Is it just an open house in here?Copy !req
184. - The whole system's gotten out of hand.
- Yeah.Copy !req
185. - You left without me.
- If I'm gonna make a strong exit...Copy !req
186. I can't wait for you to get your purse.
- How long does that take?Copy !req
187. - I've asked that my entire adult life.
- It's a non-binding resolution.Copy !req
188. - Know what that means?
- No, tell me.Copy !req
189. I've started to take
an interest in government.Copy !req
190. - Know the force and effect it has?
- Jord...Copy !req
191. None! No force and effect.Copy !req
192. This is a sampling of non-binding joint
resolutions from the 106th Congress.Copy !req
193. - I have a meeting.
- Resolution supporting Ohio state motto.Copy !req
194. A resolution fostering friendship
and cooperation with Mongolia.Copy !req
195. - I have a meeting.
- A resolution recognizing...Copy !req
196. the contributions of Tennessee
to the development of country music.Copy !req
197. - I have a budget meeting...
- A resolution supporting Little League.Copy !req
198. - Jordan...
- A resolution...Copy !req
199. This isn't that!Copy !req
200. This is 535 congressmen and senators...Copy !req
201. standing up and saying the president
lied and should be ashamed of himself...Copy !req
202. and this is us standing up
and saying,"You're right."Copy !req
203. This would be the first time ever
a president has been censured.Copy !req
204. Congress isn't talk radio,
it's the seat of democracy.Copy !req
205. Their opinion matters. Their
condemnation doesn't need handcuffs...Copy !req
206. to devastate this president.Copy !req
207. That is the force and effect, and it's
not gonna happen because of me!Copy !req
208. I have a budget meeting,
Jordan.Copy !req
209. Hey.Copy !req
210. Hey.Copy !req
211. - Listen.
- Yeah.Copy !req
212. - How's it going with the thing?
- My chapters?Copy !req
213. - I'm done.
- And?Copy !req
214. I'm fine with it.Copy !req
215. - What do you mean?
- I'm fine with it.Copy !req
216. You're saying it's all true?Copy !req
217. - No. Hardly any of it's true.
- What's not true?Copy !req
218. My name is Toby Ziegler
and I'm the communications director.Copy !req
219. Though there's a typo in
communications at one point. Perhaps.Copy !req
220. Perhaps.Copy !req
221. Perhaps I mumble from time
to time, but prickly, I do not think so.Copy !req
222. Nonetheless, I'm fine with it.Copy !req
223. Toby, no kidding,
I need a fact/fiction paper.Copy !req
224. I'd rather not have
one over my signature.Copy !req
225. There's a ticking clock. It has
to get discredited before it's real.Copy !req
226. I remember this guy as a not
very talented, not very pleasant...Copy !req
227. malcontent, who wasn't
here very long.Copy !req
228. - Am I remembering the right guy?
- Yeah.Copy !req
229. Yeah, I don't want him
to know I remember him at all.Copy !req
230. That's nice. If we can only get 200
million other people to think that way.Copy !req
231. Conventional wisdom
in Washington is like concrete.Copy !req
232. It hardens, there's nothing
you can do about it. So let's...Copy !req
233. Is there anything in particular?Copy !req
234. - In your chapters?
- Yeah.Copy !req
235. It says we were sent out of the
Oval Office to write an introduction...Copy !req
236. for a Teacher of the Year ceremony,
while others stayed...Copy !req
237. to discuss Latin America.
We weren't sent out.Copy !req
238. We left voluntarily to work
on an education address...Copy !req
239. instead of waiting 10 minutes while
operators connected the president...Copy !req
240. with the president of Ecuador,
who was complaining...Copy !req
241. about how we resolve
the banana crisis.Copy !req
242. We weren't sent out.Copy !req
243. - Will you put that down in a memo?
- Yeah.Copy !req
244. He'll be ready for you in a minute.Copy !req
245. Okay.Copy !req
246. On Carol's birthday,
did you attend a séance...Copy !req
247. where they tried to contact
Margaret's grandmother?Copy !req
248. No, right?Copy !req
249. Yes, sir.Copy !req
250. You can go on in.Copy !req
251. Thanks.Copy !req
252. - Hey.
- Good afternoon, Mr. President.Copy !req
253. There seems to be a growing
consensus that no one believes...Copy !req
254. I'm serious about paying down
a trillion dollars of the debt...Copy !req
255. when I'm willing to spend
200 billion on the Child Poverty Fund.Copy !req
256. - I agree.
- I'm not saying we're not gonna do it.Copy !req
257. We're just gonna find a different way
of saying we're gonna do it.Copy !req
258. - We're on it.
- Anything else?Copy !req
259. - Thank you, Mr. President.
- Thank you.Copy !req
260. What's going on?Copy !req
261. I guess you should know we have galleys
of a book that's coming out.Copy !req
262. A kiss and tell by a photographer
who worked here for about a half-hour.Copy !req
263. - Fiction or nonfiction?
- Science fiction.Copy !req
264. What else?Copy !req
265. Everything else
is the State of the Union.Copy !req
266. All right.
Hey, you wanna see something?Copy !req
267. Charlie gave this to me.Copy !req
268. It's a map of the Holy Land,
drawn in 1709.Copy !req
269. He got it at a flea market.Copy !req
270. It's hand-colored, copper-engraved.
I was gonna put it in the outer office.Copy !req
271. - This outer office?
- Yeah.Copy !req
272. - No.
- Why?Copy !req
273. - Why?
- Yeah.Copy !req
274. Because some people
are gonna find it offensive.Copy !req
275. - Why?
- It doesn't recognize Israel.Copy !req
276. - It was drawn in 1709.
- Yeah.Copy !req
277. There was no Israel. Israel wouldn't
happen for another 250 years.Copy !req
278. - Yeah.
- So, what's the problem with the map?Copy !req
279. - Some people are gonna find it offensive.
- Why?Copy !req
280. - It doesn't recognize Israel.
- Take lunch, would you?Copy !req
281. Hey, your favorite movie
was on TV last night.Copy !req
282. By God, I'm 50, alive and a king,
all at the same time.Copy !req
283. I turned it on as they got to the scene
when Richard, Geoffrey and John...Copy !req
284. were locked in the dungeon. Henry
was coming down to execute them.Copy !req
285. Richard tells his brothers
not to cower, but to take it like men.Copy !req
286. And Geoffrey says,"You fool.Copy !req
287. As if it matters how a man falls down."Copy !req
288. And Richard says,
"When the fall is all that's left...Copy !req
289. it matters a great deal."Copy !req
290. It matters a great deal.Copy !req
291. You trying to tell me something?Copy !req
292. No, Mr. President, of course not.Copy !req
293. Okay.Copy !req
294. Thank you, sir.Copy !req
295. Josh Lyman's office.Copy !req
296. - Hi, Amy, it's Donna Moss.
- I'll take it. That's for me.Copy !req
297. Yeah, I'm not sure if he's in.
Let me check.Copy !req
298. Press hold. And I will pick
up the phone in my office.Copy !req
299. I'm sorry, how does
a telephone work again?Copy !req
300. Hang on just a second, Amy.Copy !req
301. - Amy.
- Hey, J.Copy !req
302. - How you doing?
- Good, and you?Copy !req
303. - Good.
- My office said you called.Copy !req
304. Are you wrestling with someone,
are you in the middle of a match?Copy !req
305. - I'm at the gym.
- You spend a lot of time at the gym.Copy !req
306. - Compared to whom?
- Compared to me.Copy !req
307. - We need to talk about something.
- What's that?Copy !req
308. Josh?Copy !req
309. Paid family leave. Sorry,
there was a dog in here for a second.Copy !req
310. A dog?Copy !req
311. A nice one, it was okay.Copy !req
312. So, what about paid family leave?Copy !req
313. I'd like to talk about this in person,
any chance we can get together?Copy !req
314. Sure.
Can you have a late drink tonight?Copy !req
315. - Yes. As late as you like.
- Great. I have a date.Copy !req
316. - But I should be able to meet by 11.
- Well, I don't want to...Copy !req
317. bust up your date or anything.
- No.Copy !req
318. We're going to the ballet,
I can meet you.Copy !req
319. - How's the Ritz-Carlton?
- Eleven o'clock.Copy !req
320. See you then.Copy !req
321. - Anything?
- Phone messages.Copy !req
322. - Thank you.
- I'm moving the 4:00 with Treasury.Copy !req
323. - Okay.
- They upped the prediction...Copy !req
324. to 18 inches by morning.
Jordan Kindall's still in your office.Copy !req
325. A resolution recognizing
the important contributions...Copy !req
326. of Americans of Austrian descent.Copy !req
327. - Margaret?
- I'm sorry. Was our meeting over?Copy !req
328. - Yes?
- Close the door.Copy !req
329. A resolution remembering the life of
Washington. There was a chance...Copy !req
330. we were gonna forget.
- Look...Copy !req
331. What's the tall thing
at the end of the mall?Copy !req
332. A monument?
Where are we?Copy !req
333. - Jordan...
- No.Copy !req
334. The opinion of Congress matters? Yes.
They rattle it off every day on television.Copy !req
335. - It's not the...
- Your reputation's saved.Copy !req
336. - My reputation isn't...
- He put you on the hot seat.Copy !req
337. - This is not your thing.
- It is my thing.Copy !req
338. I can't allow you to talk like that.Copy !req
339. I wasn't seeking your permission.
You need to get...Copy !req
340. You need to get that I am
the White House chief of staff.Copy !req
341. How much longer do you
think you'll keep that job...Copy !req
342. if you tell the story
they'll make you tell?Copy !req
343. Play the tape through to the end, Leo.Copy !req
344. It's not my decision.Copy !req
345. I think it is.Copy !req
346. In fact, I know it.Copy !req
347. And you know it too.Copy !req
348. I have a meeting.Copy !req
349. - What are you still doing here?
- C.J. 's here.Copy !req
350. - The book?
- Yeah.Copy !req
351. - You know if it's started snowing yet?
- It hasn't.Copy !req
352. How is it supposed to be 18 inches
by the morning if it hasn't started?Copy !req
353. It accumulates by a magnitude,
I don't know.Copy !req
354. Okay.Copy !req
355. - Josh?
- Yeah.Copy !req
356. You wanted me to tell
you when it's 10:45.Copy !req
357. See you.Copy !req
358. I'll get home fine.Copy !req
359. What's the problem?Copy !req
360. It's not fit for man nor beast out there.Copy !req
361. Has it started snowing yet?Copy !req
362. It accumulates by a magnitude.Copy !req
363. - I'll see you.
- You want this?Copy !req
364. No.Copy !req
365. - Josh Lyman's office.
- Donna?Copy !req
366. - Yeah.
- It's Cliff.Copy !req
367. I need to meet with you and I need
for nobody else to know it's happening.Copy !req
368. - Can you meet me right now?
- Why?Copy !req
369. It's not social.Copy !req
370. No way. I can't.Copy !req
371. There's nothing wrong.
It's not against the law.Copy !req
372. - How do I know?
- I'm a lawyer.Copy !req
373. - You're not my lawyer.
- I'll be at Georgetown Law Library...Copy !req
374. in 20 minutes.Copy !req
375. I'll be in the Federal Case Law section.Copy !req
376. I'm a senior assistant. This is way
over my head. It doesn't feel right.Copy !req
377. I can't go deep-throating
in the middle...Copy !req
378. Cliff?Copy !req
379. Are you there?Copy !req
380. - Sir? C.J.
- Thanks.Copy !req
381. - Good evening, Mr. President.
- Hey, C.J.Copy !req
382. - You're working late.
- You too, what's up?Copy !req
383. - Well, this might sound ridiculous.
- Let's lay odds.Copy !req
384. - We're trying to vet this book.
- I heard about it.Copy !req
385. - So.
- Yes?Copy !req
386. "It is well-known in the White House,
after having two daughters...Copy !req
387. Bartlet wanted a son
and sought advice from the book:Copy !req
388. How to Choose the Sex of Your Baby,
by Dr. Landrum B. Shettles.Copy !req
389. The book recommends that the
father-to-be 'avoid jockey shorts...Copy !req
390. jockstraps and other
tight-fitting clothes. '"Copy !req
391. Yeah?Copy !req
392. So I can put you down for a no.Copy !req
393. When you're gonna be a father, you
root for 10 fingers, 10 toes, that's it.Copy !req
394. - Thank you, Mr. President.
- Wait.Copy !req
395. I wanna show you this
map Charlie found.Copy !req
396. I know. You can't put it
up in the West Wing.Copy !req
397. - C.J.
- It doesn't recognize Israel.Copy !req
398. - There was no Israel in 1709.
- That's right.Copy !req
399. - So it's not on the map.
- Which is what some will find offensive.Copy !req
400. - That's ridiculous.
- Know what would be great?Copy !req
401. - If I put it someplace else?
- Yes.Copy !req
402. Leo has, in what was his house when
he was married, a map of the U.S.Copy !req
403. The first third of it is the
13 original colonies.Copy !req
404. The second third is the French Territory
of Louisiana, the third third is Mexico.Copy !req
405. In this map of the United States
there is not a single state.Copy !req
406. That's because when this map was
made there was no United States.Copy !req
407. I'm the president of the United
States. I'm not offended by it.Copy !req
408. You're bigger than 10 men.
Say we put it out of the way.Copy !req
409. I'm having it enlarged and bolting
it to the hood of my limo.Copy !req
410. They don't want us to put
up our map, Charlie.Copy !req
411. They're Philistines
in the fight for freedom...Copy !req
412. but that doesn't bother us, does it?Copy !req
413. Never mind.Copy !req
414. I'm not agreeing with the people
who are gonna be offended.Copy !req
415. You're asking for a lot of pain in
exchange for nothing but an old map.Copy !req
416. That's the key, an old map,
an old map.Copy !req
417. - Spin that.
- You got me spinning things.Copy !req
418. - Anything else?
- You didn't have special underwear?Copy !req
419. - Thank you.
- Thank you, Mr. President.Copy !req
420. Donna?Copy !req
421. - What's going on?
- Thanks for coming.Copy !req
422. - What's going on?
- I need to set up a meeting with Josh.Copy !req
423. A phone conversation is fine.
I need it right away.Copy !req
424. Is this why your office
has been calling?Copy !req
425. - We wouldn't be here if you'd call back.
- I return the calls Josh tells me to.Copy !req
426. - I need the conversation.
- Why?Copy !req
427. - I can't say why.
- I can't.Copy !req
428. - I can't tell Josh we spoke.
- There's no jeopardy.Copy !req
429. I'd be going behind the backs of
the Counsel...Copy !req
430. I'm trying to help Leo McGarry.Copy !req
431. Since when are you in the business
of helping Leo McGarry?Copy !req
432. You're the one
who had the recess called.Copy !req
433. Before the Christmas break.Copy !req
434. - You're the reason they adjourned.
- I'm not.Copy !req
435. - You had the recess called.
- It was the chairman.Copy !req
436. You got him to do it.Copy !req
437. Something was about to happen, and a
recess was called and Josh was relieved.Copy !req
438. - What was about to happen?
- I can't tell you that.Copy !req
439. It was you.Copy !req
440. I need to talk to Josh.Copy !req
441. I'm leaving now.Copy !req
442. Wait by your phone.Copy !req
443. - Hello.
- Hi.Copy !req
444. - How was the ballet?
- It was wonderful.Copy !req
445. - Which one was it?
- Do you know ballet?Copy !req
446. I know The Nutcracker,
though I've never been.Copy !req
447. - There are others.
- I should start with The Nutcracker?Copy !req
448. - You don't like the ballet?
- No.Copy !req
449. You've reached that conclusion
without ever having been to one.Copy !req
450. I've never been to Bosnia
either. I don't think I will.Copy !req
451. Don't mind sending Marines
though, do you?Copy !req
452. Not a bit.Copy !req
453. - Hey, can I get you something?
- Absolut martini on the rocks.Copy !req
454. Two olives, please.Copy !req
455. What do you want, J?Copy !req
456. - I'm sorry?
- What do you wanna talk about?Copy !req
457. Paid family leave.Copy !req
458. - What about it?
- It's not gonna happen.Copy !req
459. - I know.
- At least not this year.Copy !req
460. - I know.
- I mean we can't even go for it.Copy !req
461. - We asked you not to go for it.
- We can't.Copy !req
462. Josh, our lobbyists sat
with Legislative Affairs...Copy !req
463. and everybody decided it would
cost too much in political capital.Copy !req
464. Who was the date?Copy !req
465. - Excuse me?
- At the ballet.Copy !req
466. A guy I've been seeing.Copy !req
467. - And he likes the ballet?
- He likes me.Copy !req
468. - I think he likes the ballet.
- What is that supposed to mean?Copy !req
469. Thank you.
Thank you for the extra olive.Copy !req
470. Sure.Copy !req
471. "Sure."Copy !req
472. That's your type, isn't it?Copy !req
473. - Won't catch her at the ballet.
- Or in a library either.Copy !req
474. - She seemed smart.
- What do you want?Copy !req
475. - How can you be blasé about this?
- About what?Copy !req
476. The United States is one of
only six other countries out of 152...Copy !req
477. that has no national policy
regarding paid maternal leave.Copy !req
478. Neither does Papua New Guinea,
so we're fine.Copy !req
479. - Really?
- Why you talking to me? Get...Copy !req
480. - Can't do it.
- I know!Copy !req
481. But, money has been
put aside for a study.Copy !req
482. - That's great.
- The thing is...Copy !req
483. and here's the bad news.
- Yeah?Copy !req
484. - You guys wanted 21 million?
- Yeah.Copy !req
485. It's gonna be $20,500,000.Copy !req
486. You wanna take my head off, go ahead.Copy !req
487. What the hell is going on?Copy !req
488. Things are tight all over.Copy !req
489. Is it possible you're so addled you
constructed some nonsense problem...Copy !req
490. so you'd have an excuse to see me?Copy !req
491. I mean, is it possible? I suppose...Copy !req
492. you could say...
- I don't believe you.Copy !req
493. - Hey, you threw a water balloon at me.
- And?Copy !req
494. - I was throwing that out there.
- Look...Copy !req
495. - Like there's no reason you're here?
- I thought there was a problem.Copy !req
496. All I know is you and I are here.
Nijinsky's home watching Leno.Copy !req
497. Make fun of my boyfriend,
seeing as how you've never met him.Copy !req
498. - Your boyfriend?
- Why can't you say:Copy !req
499. "Would you like to go out sometime?"
Why?Copy !req
500. - I'll tell you why.
- Do you need me in this conversation...Copy !req
501. Because this is what you like. This.Copy !req
502. - Not anything else. It's the fun part.
- That's not true.Copy !req
503. It is. We're not in the dorm anymore.
I'm paid a lot of money...Copy !req
504. and I'm not into getting diddled
around by guys like you.Copy !req
505. That's the fifth time
you said'guys like you."Copy !req
506. - It is not.
- It's the second time.Copy !req
507. Fine.Copy !req
508. What's with guys like me?Copy !req
509. If this thing went five minutes longer
than you wanted it to go...Copy !req
510. you'd run for the hills.
You hit and run, Josh.Copy !req
511. That's not true.Copy !req
512. Excuse me.Copy !req
513. Hello.Copy !req
514. Donna, I'm kind of in the middle
of something.Copy !req
515. What were you doing talking to...?Copy !req
516. Okay, tell him yeah.Copy !req
517. - I have to go.
- Yes, indeed.Copy !req
518. I'm sorry, I can't explain.Copy !req
519. I have to go.Copy !req
520. Mr. President.Copy !req
521. - Can you see Sam?
- Sure.Copy !req
522. Good evening, sir.Copy !req
523. Everybody's working late.Copy !req
524. - I live here in January.
- How's it going?Copy !req
525. It's going well, I think, but, I
don't know, who knows at this point.Copy !req
526. - The early drafts look good.
- Thank you.Copy !req
527. But I'm not here
for the State of the Union.Copy !req
528. There's a book coming out
in three weeks.Copy !req
529. I heard. I'm not gonna talk to you
about my underwear.Copy !req
530. That's disappointing, Mr. President.Copy !req
531. I want to ask. The guy claims, while you
don't poll on matters of foreign policy...Copy !req
532. at the first meeting
with the Joint Chiefs...Copy !req
533. you upbraided them
for bloated Pentagon spending...Copy !req
534. and told them 73 percent
of the public was with you on it.Copy !req
535. - I don't remember any such poll.
- No, but it doesn't mean it wasn't done.Copy !req
536. Remember saying
that at the first meeting?Copy !req
537. - I don't.
- Could you have said it?Copy !req
538. - I don't even remember the meeting.
- Okay.Copy !req
539. Thank you, sir.Copy !req
540. Why does it matter?Copy !req
541. - Excuse me?
- I said, why does it matter?Copy !req
542. Well, because I don't think it's such
a good idea to be casual about the truth.Copy !req
543. Neither do I.Copy !req
544. Thank you, sir.Copy !req
545. - Leo?
- Yeah.Copy !req
546. - What are you doing down here?
- Change of scenery.Copy !req
547. What are you doing?Copy !req
548. Well, I'd like to talk to you
about the deal they're offering.Copy !req
549. Please, keep your voice down.Copy !req
550. There's nobody here,
and my voice is down.Copy !req
551. - Who have you been talking to?
- Cliff Calley.Copy !req
552. - How did you get hooked up with him?
- Doesn't matter.Copy !req
553. - It does matter.
- I'm not pushing you, okay?Copy !req
554. - I just want to hear your reasons.
- What are your reasons?Copy !req
555. Gets it over, instead of dragging
it through primary season.Copy !req
556. Moreover, you don't take
the stand on Monday.Copy !req
557. It's ridiculous to think that
this would end it.Copy !req
558. All it means is it would
go down in history.Copy !req
559. It's a press release.Copy !req
560. When the British ambassador
told the German foreign minister...Copy !req
561. they were going to war over Belgium's
violation of the neutrality treaty...Copy !req
562. the foreign minister said,"You're
going to war over a piece of paper?"Copy !req
563. - Leo.
- It is an historical judgment.Copy !req
564. Andrew Jackson knew that.Copy !req
565. Jackson was censured?Copy !req
566. Over the Bank of the U.S.Copy !req
567. Guess what?Copy !req
568. I didn't know that.Copy !req
569. - What's your point?
- History forgets these things.Copy !req
570. Presidents don't.Copy !req
571. They never get over it.
This one won't.Copy !req
572. He'd act like it's fine...Copy !req
573. but he'd never get over it.Copy !req
574. So that's my reason.Copy !req
575. All right.Copy !req
576. - You going home?
- Yeah. Sure.Copy !req
577. - Have a good night.
- You too.Copy !req
578. McDeere shot one for 23
from the field last night.Copy !req
579. He missed his first 18 attempts.Copy !req
580. Wouldn't you think
after the first 17 misses...Copy !req
581. the coach would say,
"This isn't your night"?Copy !req
582. You don't have work to do?Copy !req
583. - I have a lot of work to do.
- And?Copy !req
584. - Can't rush these things.
- No.Copy !req
585. One for 23. That's exactly one
better than my mother would've done.Copy !req
586. She's been dead 12 years.Copy !req
587. - Excuse me.
- Hi.Copy !req
588. I asked the president
about that first meeting.Copy !req
589. - Which meeting?
- The Joint Chiefs.Copy !req
590. - What did he say?
- He didn't remember if we did a poll.Copy !req
591. Yeah, I don't either.Copy !req
592. - Toby...
- How long ago was it?Copy !req
593. - I don't know, like, two years ago.
- How many polls ago?Copy !req
594. I'm sorry, we can't sit on the sidelines
and ignore this crap. I'm not going to.Copy !req
595. - Why am I the only one taking it seriously?
- Reasonable question.Copy !req
596. - Let's explore that.
- It's not what you think.Copy !req
597. - You hired the guy.
- Yes, I hired the guy, but that's not...Copy !req
598. Legitimate news organizations
will cover this.Copy !req
599. To say nothing of people
who hate us...Copy !req
600. who are gonna run
it over, over, over, over, over...Copy !req
601. The guy was here three minutes
and he was fired. He's not credible.Copy !req
602. I'm a lawyer, I'm telling you.
That has to be made clear.Copy !req
603. Every time he makes a factual mistake,
we gotta have a press release.Copy !req
604. Every time he misquotes
or misidentifies anyone...Copy !req
605. we need to have an affidavit
swearing to the truth.Copy !req
606. He needs to be killed
until he is dead, and then killed again.Copy !req
607. Or he's gonna keep biting at our ankles
all through the campaign.Copy !req
608. He needs to be a joke,
or we're gonna be.Copy !req
609. I'm not screwing around.Copy !req
610. Me neither. Sit down.Copy !req
611. I'm not gonna be a victim of this.Copy !req
612. Let me tell you something
I've learned in my years.Copy !req
613. There are victims of fires.
There are victims of car accidents.Copy !req
614. This kind of thing? There are no victims.Copy !req
615. Just volunteers.
Of course we'll get in the game.Copy !req
616. I'll talk to the major papers, but we're
not gonna refute every bogus charge.Copy !req
617. First of all, there are
too many of them.Copy !req
618. I'm not gonna give this guy
the weight of the White House.Copy !req
619. I read the book because I had to.
You have a vague recollection of him.Copy !req
620. He wasn't here long enough to make
an impression. Have you read it? No.Copy !req
621. You're too busy doing a job.Copy !req
622. While you convince
the papers it's ridiculous...Copy !req
623. Again, we don't know
what's going on in the Oval Office.Copy !req
624. There's a problem.
When it's our turn to worry...Copy !req
625. they won't be shy about telling us.Copy !req
626. Let's not fixate on the knuckleheaded
stuff in the meantime.Copy !req
627. And it feels a lot like
that's what you're doing.Copy !req
628. Are you inside?Copy !req
629. Josh is.Copy !req
630. But let me ask you this: A guy shoots
one for 23 from the field.Copy !req
631. McDeere.Copy !req
632. But he goes eight for eight
from the foul line.Copy !req
633. Why are you fouling this guy at all?
I'd get out of the way...Copy !req
634. and point him toward the basket.Copy !req
635. - Yeah.
- So we're done talking about this now.Copy !req
636. - Is there any beer?
- You have offices.Copy !req
637. It's out in the refrigerator.Copy !req
638. - Hey.
- What?Copy !req
639. It started snowing.Copy !req
640. You owe me half a million
dollars and a drink.Copy !req
641. - I paid for the drinks.
- All right, 500 grand.Copy !req
642. What are you doing here?Copy !req
643. Just hanging out.Copy !req
644. Why, do you live here?Copy !req
645. I do.Copy !req
646. I'm sorry I had to leave quickly before.
I still can't tell you why.Copy !req
647. - Is it a matter of national security?
- No.Copy !req
648. - Would you tell me if it was?
- No.Copy !req
649. Okay.Copy !req
650. You didn't talk to me much at school.Copy !req
651. You were having
quite a bit of sex with Chris.Copy !req
652. There were times I wasn't.Copy !req
653. I studied a lot in school.Copy !req
654. I studied hard in high school
and at Harvard and in law school.Copy !req
655. My IQ doesn't break the bank,
and I wanted to do this...Copy !req
656. so I studied all the time.Copy !req
657. And I missed something,
or it's like I skipped a year...Copy !req
658. because I never learned what you do
after you think you like somebody.Copy !req
659. What you do next.
And everybody did learn.Copy !req
660. A lot of other people anyway.Copy !req
661. I didn't walk out tonight.Copy !req
662. When my phone rings at 11:00,
it's important. Not important to me.Copy !req
663. Important. And I'm not puffing
myself so...Copy !req
664. You know what?Copy !req
665. Maybe not so much for you
with the talking.Copy !req
666. Thanks for the drink.Copy !req
667. - Excuse me.
- Good evening, Mr. President.Copy !req
668. You want to step in for a second?Copy !req
669. Are you up reading?Copy !req
670. Yeah. No. A little bit.Copy !req
671. Mostly I've been talking with Babish
and some of the deputies.Copy !req
672. The chairman, Trent.Copy !req
673. The speaker,
the minority leader.Copy !req
674. No.Copy !req
675. - Yeah. I'm gonna do it.
- Sir.Copy !req
676. - Yeah.
- It doesn't get Abbey off the hook.Copy !req
677. She's still gonna have
to deal with the AMA.Copy !req
678. - Yeah.
- It doesn't clear us up for the campaign.Copy !req
679. It's a different-looking
stage weight around our ankle.Copy !req
680. Now it comes with a Congressional Seal.
It doesn't give room to argue the point.Copy !req
681. We've got two, maybe as many as three
dozen House Democrats in tight races...Copy !req
682. and you've still got MS.Copy !req
683. Doing this to save me the embarrassment
I've got coming to me...Copy !req
684. is about the dumbest reason
I can think...Copy !req
685. There's another reason.Copy !req
686. What?Copy !req
687. I was wrong.Copy !req
688. I was. I was just... I was wrong.Copy !req
689. Come on, we know that.Copy !req
690. Lots of times we don't know
what right or wrong is.Copy !req
691. But lots of times we do,
and come on, this is one.Copy !req
692. I may not have had
sinister intent at the outset.Copy !req
693. But there were plenty
of opportunities for me to make it right.Copy !req
694. No one in government takes
responsibility for anything anymore.Copy !req
695. We foster, we obfuscate,
we rationalize.Copy !req
696. "Everybody does it,"
that's what we say.Copy !req
697. So we come to occupy
a moral safe house...Copy !req
698. where everyone's to blame
so no one's guilty.Copy !req
699. I'm to blame.Copy !req
700. I was wrong.Copy !req
701. You're ready for a joint resolution.Copy !req
702. As a matter of fact,
it's not a joint resolution.Copy !req
703. The president has to sign
a joint resolution.Copy !req
704. So technically
it's a concurrent resolution.Copy !req
705. House Concurrent Resolution 172.Copy !req
706. The lawyers'll haggle over
the wording in the next few days.Copy !req
707. So at least I'll make history, huh?Copy !req
708. No. I thought so too,
until I was talking to Josh.Copy !req
709. Andrew Jackson, 1834.Copy !req
710. He was censured in '34,
he got it expunged in '36.Copy !req
711. Good point.Copy !req
712. It's not that cold out.Copy !req
713. Let me ask you something. You may
be the last sane voice around here.Copy !req
714. Before I forget.
The map that Charlie gave you.Copy !req
715. - Don't put it where people can see it.
- I don't believe it.Copy !req
716. Recognizing Israel's a hot button,
wouldn't you say?Copy !req
717. In Lebanon. Not here.Copy !req
718. It's not like I'm thinking,"God,
I was gonna recognize Israel...Copy !req
719. but now that I've seen this map..."
Know what?Copy !req
720. Let's sit here quietly.Copy !req
721. Yes, sir.Copy !req
722. Would the Secretary read
House Concurrent Resolution 172?Copy !req
723. "Whereas, in his conduct of the office
of the president of the United States...Copy !req
724. Josiah Bartlet has engaged in a course
of deceitful and dishonest conduct...Copy !req
725. designed to impede and deny
the disclosure of vital matters...Copy !req
726. of public concern.Copy !req
727. The United States Congress
hereby condemns him...Copy !req
728. for acting in a manner contrary
to his trust as president...Copy !req
729. to the prejudice
of the cause of justice...Copy !req
730. and to the manifest injury
of the American people."Copy !req