1. I conjure and constrain thee!Copy !req
2. Demons of the equal sphere!Copy !req
3. Creatures of the second world!Copy !req
4. Enter my circle and do my will!Copy !req
5. For I command this!Copy !req
6. Torrid's a dick. Who does that?Copy !req
7. Who opens up hell? Honestly.Copy !req
8. If Torrid gets the portal open
we're done for.Copy !req
9. Once the second world comes through,Copy !req
10. we haven't the power to stop them.Copy !req
11. I gotta be honest I'm scared.Copy !req
12. I'm at like a nine scared.Copy !req
13. Nine point three, maybe.Copy !req
14. We should all be at ten!Copy !req
15. There isn't a sorcerer alive
who has the abilityCopy !req
16. to fight the denizens
of the second world...Copy !req
17. I'm a ten.Copy !req
18. If Orpheus is going Bo Derrick,Copy !req
19. then I'm pushing it up to eight.Copy !req
20. I admire your bravery.Copy !req
21. Now are you ready to wage our final battle?Copy !req
22. What? Hell no.Copy !req
23. I have one more thing to try.Copy !req
24. Stop being a pud!Copy !req
25. Knock it off, ya dingbat!Copy !req
26. Nobody wants you to open a door to hell!Copy !req
27. Nooo! I command thee!Copy !req
28. Nooo! Please!Copy !req
29. Aaaahhhh!Copy !req
30. Something just came out of the vortexCopy !req
31. and killed Torrid.Copy !req
32. So... that happened.Copy !req
33. The time is now! Triad, join me!Copy !req
34. For I am Dr. Orpheus!Copy !req
35. Master of mysticism!Copy !req
36. I don't want to do that
introducing ourselves bit.Copy !req
37. It's goofy.Copy !req
38. Let's not die being goofy.Copy !req
39. I'm with Al.Copy !req
40. Maybe we could sing a
Stevie Wonder song together?Copy !req
41. Yeah, that's not much better.Copy !req
42. Triad! Attack!Copy !req
43. Are you okay?Copy !req
44. I'm pretty sure that
all my ribs are broken!Copy !req
45. Can someone help!Copy !req
46. Haristum, lend me your power of fire!Copy !req
47. Nice! You made it bigger.Copy !req
48. Forget him. Shoot me!Copy !req
49. Kill me!Copy !req
50. Back to the depth from which you came!Copy !req
51. He was just dead.Copy !req
52. He'll be fine.Copy !req
53. 'Til the next time, gentlemen.Copy !req
54. Black Lightning! Ride!Copy !req
55. Call me!Copy !req
56. "Call me"? What was that?Copy !req
57. Instinct? He's adorable. I panicked.Copy !req
58. Who was that guy?Copy !req
59. That guy was The Outrider.Copy !req
60. Oh my God!Copy !req
61. That's the guy who—Copy !req
62. Stole my wife!Copy !req
63. Did Uncle Gentleman die again?Copy !req
64. What's with the suit?Copy !req
65. Nothing. Is it illegal to look good?Copy !req
66. Yeah, in this house it kinda is.Copy !req
67. You think I like wearing prison pajamasCopy !req
68. with position locators sewn into them?Copy !req
69. Yes.Copy !req
70. That's because I look good in them!Copy !req
71. But if you are gonna wear that,Copy !req
72. there is a little appointment
I'd like to make to mine.Copy !req
73. So this has nothing to do
with Triana and her fatherCopy !req
74. piling up crap on our front lawn?Copy !req
75. Oh, is she out there too?Copy !req
76. Dean. Deano.Copy !req
77. When are you just gonna admit it?Copy !req
78. Admit what?Copy !req
79. Admit that I can still rock a kerchief!Copy !req
80. Score?Copy !req
81. 85%.Copy !req
82. Get out! Where did I blow it?Copy !req
83. For one, you killed Matthew Lesko.Copy !req
84. That was— Well he was
wearing punctuation on his suit!Copy !req
85. That's a total bad-guy suit!Copy !req
86. He helps people get free
money from the government.Copy !req
87. That is a good guy.Copy !req
88. It's reflected in your score.Copy !req
89. What's the use in training?Copy !req
90. I have no magic powers!Copy !req
91. The second someone
uses magic, I get killed.Copy !req
92. That was humbling for all of us.Copy !req
93. It was like he pulled down our
pants and powdered our bottoms.Copy !req
94. Humiliating. He brought me back to life.Copy !req
95. I'm serious. I saw my dead mom.Copy !req
96. And she was all
"Jefferson, head into the light,"Copy !req
97. and I was like
"I can't Mom, I have to stay hereCopy !req
98. and get my ass kicked
by a guy made outta fire."Copy !req
99. Thank God that Outrider guy was there.Copy !req
100. Don't let Orpheus hear that.Copy !req
101. If you'd a' told me you
were gonna have a yard-sale,Copy !req
102. I would've brought Dean's
ever growing collectionCopy !req
103. of apple head dolls.Copy !req
104. It's not a yard-sale.Copy !req
105. This configuration is a
portal to the second world!Copy !req
106. Sure it is.Copy !req
107. I don't get it.Copy !req
108. It's an ego thing.Copy !req
109. My dad thinks that if
The Outrider can travel through hell,Copy !req
110. he can too.Copy !req
111. Isn't The Outrider married to your mom?Copy !req
112. Yeah. I only met him once.Copy !req
113. I was eight.Copy !req
114. If I was your dad, and you were your mom,Copy !req
115. and the you that wasn't
your mom was another girl,Copy !req
116. I would never let anyone take the you-mom.Copy !req
117. That would be really sweet...Copy !req
118. if it wasn't so confusing.Copy !req
119. I'm sorry.Copy !req
120. Ooh! Can I pet your pussy?Copy !req
121. There is no irony in that, is there?Copy !req
122. It's soft.Copy !req
123. Your pussy hates me.Copy !req
124. Did Orpheus open the
ridiculous pile of crapCopy !req
125. he calls a portal yet?Copy !req
126. Is that what that is?Copy !req
127. Oh, hey. Can I ask you something?Copy !req
128. You're gay right?Copy !req
129. - Yeah.
- What's it look like?Copy !req
130. Does it look real, or all Frankenstein?Copy !req
131. - Hank?
- Your dingus. Does it look real?Copy !req
132. What is Kid Crazy talking about?Copy !req
133. He thinks you're transgender.Copy !req
134. Hank, it looks real because it is real.Copy !req
135. I'm gay.Copy !req
136. That doesn't mean I was born a woman.Copy !req
137. I have a regular "dingus" as you say.Copy !req
138. Hank, aren't you just a little
ashamed of your ignorance?Copy !req
139. Like just a little?Copy !req
140. Yeah. Constantly.Copy !req
141. O thou great and powerful Amaymon,Copy !req
142. I invoke and command theeCopy !req
143. to open these gates to the second world!Copy !req
144. Maybe you forgot to plug it in.Copy !req
145. Something has come through!Copy !req
146. Oh come on!Copy !req
147. And did you have to do that?Copy !req
148. Is the whole of this world
your personal bathroom?Copy !req
149. It was Simba...Copy !req
150. She's okay. It's my cat.Copy !req
151. She's from this world.Copy !req
152. What was supposed to happen?Copy !req
153. My mom calls his cell phoneCopy !req
154. and tells him he's a
better kisser, I think.Copy !req
155. Did the portal work? Is he in hell yet?Copy !req
156. Oooh, he's in hell alright.Copy !req
157. Master? Master?Copy !req
158. Master?Copy !req
159. Tatjana?Copy !req
160. What are you doing here?Copy !req
161. I was just sitting here
thinking how glad I amCopy !req
162. that I left you for The Outrider.Copy !req
163. And how he does that thing
you used to do with your mouth,Copy !req
164. but better because he
can hold his breath longer.Copy !req
165. Oh, it is you, my master.Copy !req
166. Duh, Orpheus.Copy !req
167. Now what's all this crybaby crap about?Copy !req
168. Aren't you used to The OutriderCopy !req
169. making you look like a schnook by now?Copy !req
170. He came out of a portal
to the second world!Copy !req
171. I have been training my whole lifeCopy !req
172. just to perceive that
there is a second world,Copy !req
173. and he can move between them?Copy !req
174. Tell me, master. How can this be?Copy !req
175. The love of a good
woman can do wonders, Orpheus.Copy !req
176. I mean look at me.Copy !req
177. These are natural C cups.Copy !req
178. Aren't they beautiful?Copy !req
179. I mean, you could bounce a penis off these.Copy !req
180. I doubt my ex-wife's
breasts are the answer.Copy !req
181. It doesn't stop there.Copy !req
182. I am sitting on what is
easily the ass of a teenager.Copy !req
183. What, does she do — pilates or something?Copy !req
184. You could rest a coffee mug on it.Copy !req
185. Really? She's almost 40 by now.Copy !req
186. Tell it to the heinie, Orpheus,Copy !req
187. 'cause it still thinks it's 1992.Copy !req
188. - What ya doing?
- Nothing.Copy !req
189. Nothing because our dad,Copy !req
190. the globe-trotting super action scientistCopy !req
191. is on the couch, "resting his eyes."Copy !req
192. This blows!Copy !req
193. I for one am appreciating
our newfound sedentary lifestyle.Copy !req
194. I appreciate our sedentary—
Oh my God! Why?Copy !req
195. For one, I get to hang
out with Triana more.Copy !req
196. I saw you two.Copy !req
197. She treats you like her friend.Copy !req
198. I am her friend.Copy !req
199. - Aaand, that's it.
- Nuh uhh!Copy !req
200. - Have you seen her naked?
- No.Copy !req
201. - Have you kissed her?
- No.Copy !req
202. - Have you even held her hand?
- No.Copy !req
203. And are you ready for
the super depressing part?Copy !req
204. Have you helped her shop for shoes?Copy !req
205. Oh my glory!Copy !req
206. Dean, she's your hag.Copy !req
207. - You're right.
- It's gonna be okay.Copy !req
208. I know a place where
the native girls abound!Copy !req
209. A paradise of young women all waitingCopy !req
210. to venture into adventure
with a Dean Venture!Copy !req
211. Get your coat!Copy !req
212. But master, The Outrider was my student!Copy !req
213. He was a petulant layabout!Copy !req
214. There is no way he
could achieve this ability!Copy !req
215. Well, he did.Copy !req
216. Maybe he got super good
at meditating, I don't know.Copy !req
217. - Impossible!
- Well, Orpheus, it happened.Copy !req
218. Hey, are you looking up my dress?Copy !req
219. See anything you miss?Copy !req
220. No...Copy !req
221. I don't miss her astounding beauty daily.Copy !req
222. Orpheus, you can't take being bested.Copy !req
223. You really thought that
you could just build a portalCopy !req
224. with lawn furniture and go kick his ass?Copy !req
225. Well, yes. Yes, I did.Copy !req
226. If that insect could do it.Copy !req
227. Okay, well go to it, champ!Copy !req
228. Go find a portal and beat him up!Copy !req
229. Solved! Just stop whining.Copy !req
230. You are giving me a huge headache.Copy !req
231. - Can you rub my temples?
- Must I?Copy !req
232. - Do you have an aspirin then?
- I don't take them.Copy !req
233. - What about ibuprofen?
- Sorry.Copy !req
234. - What about acedo-mino-mophin?
- Nope.Copy !req
235. - Tylenol PM?
- No.Copy !req
236. - What about ecstasy?
- Nothing.Copy !req
237. It's earsplitting, Orpheus.
Maybe I have a brain tumor.Copy !req
238. Seriously, you don't know any
other way to cure my headache?Copy !req
239. I can't really think of one.Copy !req
240. Oh wait, I have one.Copy !req
241. Why don't you leave me
alone so I can jump rope nakedCopy !req
242. in front of a mirror in
your ex-wife's body.Copy !req
243. Welcome to Girl Island.Copy !req
244. Hey Madison, got your text.Copy !req
245. April!Copy !req
246. Little busy now, can I hit you back later?Copy !req
247. Tina, see you got that... blue hat.Copy !req
248. That you told me about when we were—Copy !req
249. Okay, yeah, I'm busy too.Copy !req
250. You know all these girls?Copy !req
251. We talk. I keep it cas'.Copy !req
252. Don't wanna get tied down.Copy !req
253. There are tons of ladies out there.Copy !req
254. You can't walk into your back yardCopy !req
255. and fall for the first girl you see.Copy !req
256. Hank, you had a crush on the mail ladyCopy !req
257. for like five years.Copy !req
258. Ouch, touché.Copy !req
259. In my defense, she wore
very attractive shorts.Copy !req
260. And this isn't about me!Copy !req
261. You gotta get out there
and take a bite outta crime!Copy !req
262. Alright, let's get this over with...Copy !req
263. what do I do?Copy !req
264. I've done some research
on the getting of ladies.Copy !req
265. First off, pull those pants
down from your armpits.Copy !req
266. Now muss up your hair.Copy !req
267. I look like Rufio.Copy !req
268. You are the Pan, Dean. You are the Pan.Copy !req
269. Okay, that blonde is showing indicators.Copy !req
270. Feigning disinterest is a clear signal.Copy !req
271. Now go engage that two-set!Copy !req
272. What are you saying!Copy !req
273. Go talk to them!Copy !req
274. My brother pushed me.Copy !req
275. You blew your opener, so lock in
and move to kino escalation.Copy !req
276. Body contact!Copy !req
277. Isolate the target, and enter your set.Copy !req
278. I'll run wing on the remainder.Copy !req
279. I'm going home.Copy !req
280. It's just a freeze-out!Copy !req
281. You can still reengage and number close!Copy !req
282. This is inappropriately short.Copy !req
283. How did it go?Copy !req
284. - What are you doing in here?
- Did he mention me?Copy !req
285. The Master in your daughter's closet,
that may not exist?Copy !req
286. No, he didn't mention you.Copy !req
287. It went like it always does.Copy !req
288. He tore away at my heart
'til he kicked me out.Copy !req
289. No mystic revelations?Copy !req
290. Clues to deeper meanings?Copy !req
291. No, he told me to go to my
portal and beat up The Outrider.Copy !req
292. Isn't that helpful?Copy !req
293. That's not the only portal.Copy !req
294. Honestly, that's not even 'a' portal.Copy !req
295. I think he wants us to
go to the original one.Copy !req
296. Al!Copy !req
297. You are again a shining exampleCopy !req
298. of the Triad's great spark!Copy !req
299. Swoosh, and the crowd goes crazy!Copy !req
300. So can I go into the
closet with you next timeCopy !req
301. and meet your mystic Master?Copy !req
302. No, that's my— That's my thing.Copy !req
303. Oh, hi, Pumpkin.Copy !req
304. What were you guys doing in my bedroom?Copy !req
305. Umm, well Al wanted, uh —Copy !req
306. I wanted to see your CD collection!Copy !req
307. Yeah, I'm old-school deathrock.Copy !req
308. I used to go to the Bat CaveCopy !req
309. when Nick Fiend was still the doorman.Copy !req
310. Yes! That's true. He was.Copy !req
311. We'd love to stay and
bail ourselves out, but we—Copy !req
312. Yes! So... with wings of light!Copy !req
313. By day and night!Copy !req
314. We make our flight!Copy !req
315. Hello?Copy !req
316. - Knew it!
- Every time!Copy !req
317. So close! So close.Copy !req
318. No, it's true.Copy !req
319. We were way closer to the ground this time.Copy !req
320. You know it's me.Copy !req
321. You won't admit that the
non-magic Blackula hunterCopy !req
322. is holding you back.Copy !req
323. Jefferson, astral
peregrination is very difficult.Copy !req
324. It could be something as
minor as a weight issue.Copy !req
325. Okay, that is a genetic problem!Copy !req
326. So why don't we stop picking on the fat kidCopy !req
327. and crank this portal up.Copy !req
328. Place is creeping me out.Copy !req
329. Man, somebody's been practicing.Copy !req
330. I didn't do anything.Copy !req
331. That's just happening.Copy !req
332. Triad! Be unseen!Copy !req
333. Was something supposed to happen?Copy !req
334. Are we invisible now, or something?Copy !req
335. No, I meant that we should hide.Copy !req
336. Just like behind something.Copy !req
337. Well be specific next time.Copy !req
338. Kill me, Outrider.Copy !req
339. I have seen too much.Copy !req
340. Hell is my every sight, my every thought...Copy !req
341. end my pain!Copy !req
342. Silat! Anabotas!Copy !req
343. Deliver this infidel to peace.Copy !req
344. His suffering has been long enough.Copy !req
345. My pain is yours, Outrider!Copy !req
346. I devour you!Copy !req
347. Albrot, abracadabra, el!Copy !req
348. Enter the dragon's eye!Copy !req
349. I condemn you to damnation!Copy !req
350. That was 100% bad-ass!Copy !req
351. That was total movie cool.Copy !req
352. And Torrid actually said "abracadabra."Copy !req
353. I so thought that was a fake magic word.Copy !req
354. It's a real magic word.Copy !req
355. One of the three holy names...Copy !req
356. Oh, look at his face!Copy !req
357. Great, so we take
credit for killing Torrid,Copy !req
358. you take credit for
kicking The Outrider's ass,Copy !req
359. then we make a secret pactCopy !req
360. to never speak of this again.Copy !req
361. I've been wrong about The Outrider.Copy !req
362. He was noble and good.Copy !req
363. We can't leave him like this.Copy !req
364. Okay, we drop a rock on his head,Copy !req
365. then we make a secret pact
to never speak of this again.Copy !req
366. No. Help me get him up.Copy !req
367. We are going to rescue him...Copy !req
368. from Hell!Copy !req
369. Hello? Is anyone in here?Copy !req
370. Hi, sugar-dumpling. I was just vacuuming.Copy !req
371. After this I'm gonna watch
TV, then cry myself to sleep.Copy !req
372. I don't know, I might wake you up
in the middle of the nightCopy !req
373. and threaten to kill myself
if you leave me... again.Copy !req
374. So! How's work?Copy !req
375. What is this? Who are you?Copy !req
376. Baby-doll, it's me, your
loyal husband, Dean Venture.Copy !req
377. I'm your future! Isn't this great?Copy !req
378. That's our baby, Rusty Jr.Copy !req
379. Well, if you can call it a baby.Copy !req
380. It's got like a leg growing out of whatCopy !req
381. would be a head on a regular baby.Copy !req
382. And if you squeeze him,
poop comes out of his eyesCopy !req
383. and a little bit under his fingernails.Copy !req
384. I just walked into a closet!Copy !req
385. What is going on?Copy !req
386. We had a deformed kid
because my gene poolCopy !req
387. is more of like a gene septic tank.Copy !req
388. Yeah, I was cloned so much
I only make monster babies.Copy !req
389. Wait, Dean was cloned?Copy !req
390. Dean was cloned, Hank was cloned,Copy !req
391. and you've been here
like 10 times before this.Copy !req
392. Surprise!Copy !req
393. Somebody's been getting her memory wiped!Copy !req
394. Dean!Copy !req
395. Deeeean!Copy !req
396. Deeeean!Copy !req
397. Hey fart knocker! Over here!Copy !req
398. Dude, what are you doing here?Copy !req
399. Came for a new pair of heavy bag gloves.Copy !req
400. Tore through my last
pair whaling on the bag.Copy !req
401. Then why are you wearing
a Big Bargains apron?Copy !req
402. I don't know. What are you doing here?Copy !req
403. I thought your old man kept you on a leash.Copy !req
404. I can't find my brother and
we have to be home by dark.Copy !req
405. Sucks to be you.Copy !req
406. Oh snap! I found your brother.Copy !req
407. Where?Copy !req
408. Duh, the guy with the other flying scooter.Copy !req
409. Holy shit, he's talking to a girl!Copy !req
410. Maybe we should strip him down
and rub him with magic unctions?Copy !req
411. How will that help him?Copy !req
412. Him? I was thinking of me.Copy !req
413. We can't bring him back till
we know how he got there.Copy !req
414. There are doors to the second world.Copy !req
415. You must exit the one you entered.Copy !req
416. So, back to the portal?Copy !req
417. Portals are like windows.Copy !req
418. We need the door. The original door.Copy !req
419. This is confusing. I'm getting a headache.Copy !req
420. I don't have any asp— Wait!Copy !req
421. Yes! How did I miss it?Copy !req
422. The Master asked me to cure his headache.Copy !req
423. A headache so severe
that medication couldn't help.Copy !req
424. Of course! Trepanning.Copy !req
425. Home brain surgery!Copy !req
426. I've had all the hot chicks in this town.Copy !req
427. Yeah, my new one, she lives out of state.Copy !req
428. We hook up whenever I road trip.Copy !req
429. Is she pretty?Copy !req
430. Dude, she's a model. She's like 23.Copy !req
431. Well, Tracy — that's the girl I just met.Copy !req
432. She's a cashier.Copy !req
433. You gonna go for that piece?Copy !req
434. I'm kinda seeing someone else.Copy !req
435. What are you, married?Copy !req
436. Man, do you dig this Tracy girl or what?Copy !req
437. Well, she seems nice.Copy !req
438. And her hair is really pretty.Copy !req
439. Well talk to her then.Copy !req
440. You don't have to nail her.
Just see what happens.Copy !req
441. Man, way to be uptight.Copy !req
442. Wait, did you just give good advice?Copy !req
443. I gotta go check the temperature in hell.Copy !req
444. You can both blow me.Copy !req
445. It's like he used a bottle opener
on his prefrontal cortex.Copy !req
446. He all but gave himself a lobotomy.Copy !req
447. Holy shit! There's an old marble in here!Copy !req
448. It's an amulet.Copy !req
449. The Eye of Osiris.Copy !req
450. They were placed in the
wound left after embalmingCopy !req
451. to protect the mummy on
his journey to the underworld.Copy !req
452. - It's filthy.
- Remove it at once!Copy !req
453. The Outrider did it.Copy !req
454. He found a shortcut to the second world.Copy !req
455. I'm not sure if he's the bravest sorcerer,
or the stupidest.Copy !req
456. It's out! I did it.Copy !req
457. So, am I part of the Triad?Copy !req
458. Triad implies three.Copy !req
459. So...Copy !req
460. All right, then you guys have
to pay my rather steep fee.Copy !req
461. Welcome to the mystical
Order of the Triad,Copy !req
462. special brother Billy!Copy !req
463. Why is he still like that?Copy !req
464. We must draw him out!Copy !req
465. Draw him from hell, with hell.Copy !req
466. Quickly! What is the worst thing
that ever happened to you?Copy !req
467. Ummm, I saw my mom raped by Blackulas.Copy !req
468. I was ten... she called my name.Copy !req
469. I just stood there.Copy !req
470. Ahhh, wow.Copy !req
471. Wait. I can hear him!Copy !req
472. More ugliness!Copy !req
473. Ummm, I once saw two homeless guysCopy !req
474. giving each other oral sex.Copy !req
475. Yes! He's closer! More like that.Copy !req
476. Okay, this is really gross.Copy !req
477. Once I was out of toilet paper
so I used cotton balls.Copy !req
478. So, you know, I'm wiping,Copy !req
479. and I think my finger kinda
poked through the cotton.Copy !req
480. So I — and do not ask me why —Copy !req
481. I smell my finger to check.Copy !req
482. Gross. I see where this is going.Copy !req
483. Quickly, Al! He's so close!Copy !req
484. Okay, I bring it up to smell it, right.Copy !req
485. But somehow the cotton
got stuck to my fingers,Copy !req
486. so when I smell my fingers,Copy !req
487. the cotton's getting
stuck to my razor stubble.Copy !req
488. So I have this shit cotton
all over my face!Copy !req
489. - This can't be good.
- Tell me about it.Copy !req
490. Hey, do I really look that short?Copy !req
491. I mean, you like him, right?Copy !req
492. Yeah, but not in that way.Copy !req
493. I mean, I could... maybe.Copy !req
494. I don't know. It's so confusing.Copy !req
495. I didn't know I had to
make up my mind so fast.Copy !req
496. Maybe-schmaby!Copy !req
497. You gotta set that kid free,Copy !req
498. or you better start getting into this!Copy !req
499. Did you know that he is uncircumcised?Copy !req
500. Yeah, Mr. Baldy will
forever wear his turtleneck.Copy !req
501. That's so gross.Copy !req
502. Do I have to break his heart?Copy !req
503. No, you don't have to break his heart,Copy !req
504. but you do have to clean
his penis with a Q-tip.Copy !req
505. Okay, I'm the master.Copy !req
506. I'm like your dad's omniscient boss.Copy !req
507. So let me give you some advice.Copy !req
508. Get on with your life.Copy !req
509. You think just anyone can
walk into your closet and see me?Copy !req
510. Never thought about that.Copy !req
511. That's a regular closet
to anyone without the gift!Copy !req
512. You should start your training now.Copy !req
513. And seriously, you can
make better money at this stuffCopy !req
514. than you can as a manager of the Gap.Copy !req
515. My dad kinda wants me to go to art school.Copy !req
516. And get the world's most useless diploma!Copy !req
517. Forget your dad.Copy !req
518. He's trying to save you
from his life, not yours.Copy !req
519. Triana Orpheus, you should
go live with your motherCopy !req
520. and begin your training to be a sorceress.Copy !req
521. It's your destiny!Copy !req
522. And it's way cheaper than art school!Copy !req
523. Wow. Ya know, that all seems so right.Copy !req
524. It's like everything just makes sense now.Copy !req
525. Too bad you will forget
all this ever happened.Copy !req
526. Okay, a toupee might be too severe.Copy !req
527. Maybe a hat?Copy !req
528. Gentlemen, welcome to Hell.Copy !req
529. It kinda looks like Orpheus' kitchen.Copy !req
530. I kinda imagined it would be,Copy !req
531. I don't know, hotter,
maybe some lava pits.Copy !req
532. I don't like dry cat food.Copy !req
533. Simba?Copy !req
534. Tell your daughter I don't like
being scratched near my tail.Copy !req
535. She just doesn't get it.Copy !req
536. Oh... I'm sorry.Copy !req
537. Okay, that's better.Copy !req
538. More what I was looking for.Copy !req
539. I apologize, Outrider.Copy !req
540. I was blinded by my jealousy.Copy !req
541. I just couldn't deal with
being bested in so many ways.Copy !req
542. Ya know, I idolized you.Copy !req
543. You were everything I wanted to be.Copy !req
544. Then when I got to know you,Copy !req
545. I realized how you got so powerful.Copy !req
546. You sacrificed everything.Copy !req
547. And I knew there was a
quicker way to enlightenment.Copy !req
548. Oops, sorry. I'm in hell.Copy !req
549. Quicker, yes. But clearly more dangerous.Copy !req
550. Family was just more important to me.Copy !req
551. Whoa! Okay, let me get that...Copy !req
552. That is...Copy !req
553. Um... You dropped your dino-damage.Copy !req
554. Yes, I know that I was a rotten husband,Copy !req
555. and not much of a father,
but I tried to—Copy !req
556. Why don't you and Brundle-Fly hereCopy !req
557. finish this love-fest outside of Hell?Copy !req
558. Oh no, we can't leave.Copy !req
559. You need to be between the
two worlds to bring us back.Copy !req
560. You are trapped with me.Copy !req
561. Are you sleeping?Copy !req
562. Huh? What? Oh...Copy !req
563. I was just thinking.Copy !req
564. - Did Triana call?
- Nobody called you.Copy !req
565. Ya know, I don't think you've
ever gotten a phone call.Copy !req
566. Because if she did, I wasn't here.Copy !req
567. I was out with the boys.Copy !req
568. Meeting girls and stuff.Copy !req
569. Okay.Copy !req
570. If a girl does call, I'll be in my room.Copy !req
571. And I'll be here, Dean.Copy !req
572. Are you okay?Copy !req
573. Yeah... I'm pretty good.Copy !req
574. Well did you have to
remove the Eye of OsirisCopy !req
575. from my brain?Copy !req
576. That was working great.Copy !req
577. Me? Torrid messed that up. I'm clean.Copy !req
578. That guy's a loser.Copy !req
579. Seriously.Copy !req
580. It's always the guy that opens
up hell that gets killed first.Copy !req
581. That's basic.Copy !req
582. That is, like, first-year villain stuff.Copy !req
583. I can hear you guys.Copy !req
584. Jefferson, you are between worlds!Copy !req
585. Dude! You have a magic power!Copy !req
586. Really? I'm magic?Copy !req
587. Yes! Outstretch your hand
and bring us home!Copy !req
588. I'm trying... is it moving?Copy !req
589. Meh. You really gotta lean into it.Copy !req
590. I'm magic! Damn!Copy !req
591. Magic Blackula hunter!Copy !req
592. That should do it! Orpheus?Copy !req
593. After you.Copy !req
594. Al, your turn.Copy !req
595. Orpheus is back.Copy !req
596. I am so totally magic!Copy !req
597. Ugh! We are never
gonna hear the end of this.Copy !req
598. No, no, no, really!Copy !req
599. This woman is easily 230 pounds,Copy !req
600. and she has Orpheus tied up, right...Copy !req
601. Was he kidnapped to
perform experimental surgery?Copy !req
602. No, that's your thing!Copy !req
603. Five times this year alone!Copy !req
604. Hi, sweetie.Copy !req
605. Can't sleep?Copy !req
606. Yeah...Copy !req
607. Hey, can we talk?Copy !req
608. Now if you can't get my phone,Copy !req
609. you have my e-mail address.Copy !req
610. And if that doesn't work, you can
psychically communicate any time.Copy !req
611. Dad! I'm just going to Mom's.Copy !req
612. I'll see you all the time. Relax.Copy !req
613. Okay, okay... I worry.Copy !req
614. Jefferson, you wanna hand me that bag?Copy !req
615. Hold on! I'll use my magic powers!Copy !req
616. Yes, uh, why don't you
just hand it to me regular?Copy !req
617. Can we talk?Copy !req
618. You know what this means, right?Copy !req
619. Yes, my little girl has grown up.Copy !req
620. Ahhh, no.Copy !req
621. It means that we are gonna
have to throw a huge partyCopy !req
622. in your empty house!Copy !req
623. I've been doing a lot of thinking,Copy !req
624. and I think we should see other people.Copy !req
625. Long distance relationships can be rough.Copy !req
626. You are so wise, Dean.Copy !req
627. I'm gonna miss you.Copy !req
628. Or maybe we could try a
long distance relationship?Copy !req
629. There are too many girls waiting in line.Copy !req
630. I can't hog you all to myself.Copy !req
631. True.Copy !req