1. Doh!Copy !req
2. What the hell are you doing?Copy !req
3. I'm pretending I'm Farrah Fawcett
making her big comeback.Copy !req
4. What do you think I'm doing?Copy !req
5. I'm not gonna sleep in the bed
you pleasured Phantom Limb in.Copy !req
6. I'm burning the bed and the—Copy !req
7. What are these?
Little league trophies?Copy !req
8. And all these self help books.Copy !req
9. Then sell 'em!Copy !req
10. Do you have to burn 'em?
It's insane!Copy !req
11. You know what's insane?Copy !req
12. That you slept with a guy
who read The Secret.Copy !req
13. You want the secret?Copy !req
14. Yeah, your ex-boyfriend's pathetic!Copy !req
15. Shh. Don't tell anyone. Secret.Copy !req
16. Honey, there's no way you're
still upset about Limb.Copy !req
17. What's really bothering you, sweets?Copy !req
18. It's this whole thing. Ow!Copy !req
19. This house, this neighborhood.Copy !req
20. I can't believe I live in
a town called Malice!Copy !req
21. What? It's an excellent community.Copy !req
22. Lowest property tax in the district...Copy !req
23. three supermarkets, and—Copy !req
24. And it's a gated community
for super villains.Copy !req
25. It's like Boca Raton on
Halloween around here!Copy !req
26. It's not that bad.Copy !req
27. I mean, Manta Claws
lives a block away.Copy !req
28. You used to love Manta Claws.Copy !req
29. Till I found out he uses
a little hidden scuba tank...Copy !req
30. and the claws are made of sculpie.Copy !req
31. What about Sergeant Hatred?
You like him, right?Copy !req
32. Sergeant Hatred?Copy !req
33. Sweetie, I only hung out with him
so my henchmen could rob him blind...Copy !req
34. while I pretended
to listen to his boring stories.Copy !req
35. Well, he's having
some kind of party tonight.Copy !req
36. And he was nice enough
to invite us.Copy !req
37. I think we should go.Copy !req
38. Yeah, I'll be sure to put
that on my "to don't" list.Copy !req
39. What the hell does he have
to celebrate anyway?Copy !req
40. Hank, if a big man walks
out of the burning cloud...Copy !req
41. do not be afraid.
That's Jesus.Copy !req
42. Attention
Dr. Thaddeus S. Venture!Copy !req
43. This is Sgt. Hatred,
your new arch enemy.Copy !req
44. Prepare to meet your doom!Copy !req
45. Oh, hey... your dad around?Copy !req
46. I just gotta tell ya
what an honor it is...Copy !req
47. to be working with the legend himself,
the Dr. Venture!Copy !req
48. The guy who put the "pro"
into protagonist.Copy !req
49. Well, thank you.Copy !req
50. And sorry again,
about my man, Brock.Copy !req
51. No, no. My bad.Copy !req
52. I shouldn't have come blowing
in here like the big bad wolf.Copy !req
53. But when those
new marching orders came down...Copy !req
54. from the Guild brass, I just thought...Copy !req
55. "Hatred, why don't you swing
the old welcome tank...Copy !req
56. "over to the Venture Compound...Copy !req
57. "and give those kids a basket
of howdy-do!"Copy !req
58. Is "howdy-do" fruit?Copy !req
59. Okra!Copy !req
60. Me and the misses grow
the hell out of it.Copy !req
61. Personally, I can't stand the stuff.Copy !req
62. So you're not here to try
to kill me, then?Copy !req
63. Not yet, anyway.Copy !req
64. This is just a meet and greet.Copy !req
65. Whoa, hey! Fancy!Copy !req
66. See, Dr. Venture,
I've been at this a lotta years.Copy !req
67. And the one thing I've learned is...Copy !req
68. there's no good reason
on God's green Earth...Copy !req
69. that arching has to be
a completely unpleasant experience...Copy !req
70. for either of us.Copy !req
71. Speaking of green Earth...Copy !req
72. what do ya got out there,
Kentucky Bluegrass?Copy !req
73. Ah, that is lush!Copy !req
74. Nah, that's my own special blend..,Copy !req
75. of Blue Ridge and Creeping Red.Copy !req
76. I'm gonna say it again... lush!Copy !req
77. So you won't be tearing my roof off
in the middle of the night...Copy !req
78. or shooting at the guests attending
my monthly Book Club?Copy !req
79. No, none of that amateur hour malarkey.Copy !req
80. I know the difference
between arching...Copy !req
81. and real life, thank you.Copy !req
82. "Hate to live, don't live to hate."
That's my motto.Copy !req
83. Huh. That almost sounds sane
compared to my last arch enemy.Copy !req
84. OK, that's not even close...Copy !req
85. to the way "linens" is spelled...Copy !req
86. but those go in the hall closet, upstairs.Copy !req
87. Hey, you think you can
sign this, boss? It's for 24.Copy !req
88. He got knifed by the Moppets.Copy !req
89. Which one is 24 again?Copy !req
90. What? You're kidding, right?Copy !req
91. Let me give you hint—Copy !req
92. you know how every time you talk to me
there's usually another guy next to me?Copy !req
93. - That's 24.
- Right, right, right.Copy !req
94. The one who sounds like
Ray Romano. I like him.Copy !req
95. Oh, and hey, I staked out
the room upstairs with the—Copy !req
96. You are not sleeping
in this house, 21.Copy !req
97. None of you are!Copy !req
98. Aaah!Copy !req
99. Uh, what the Monarch is
trying to say is...Copy !req
100. We've discussed it,
and we just think it's time...Copy !req
101. we started keeping our home separate.Copy !req
102. You're not gonna live
in this sweet crib?Copy !req
103. No, we are, but—Copy !req
104. Well, then which one is my room?Copy !req
105. No, "we," meaning
the Monarch and I.Copy !req
106. Honey, a little help here?Copy !req
107. Minions!
Retreat to the Cocoon!Copy !req
108. Now!Copy !req
109. You don't need to discuss
with henchmen.Copy !req
110. Now what's this crap with your
Moppets and 24?Copy !req
111. It's awful. Tim-Tom and Kevin...Copy !req
112. came to me in tears yesterday.Copy !req
113. They're telling me the other
henchmen have been teasing them.Copy !req
114. Apparently 24 even picked
a fight with them.Copy !req
115. Can you believe that?Copy !req
116. 24? Not really.Copy !req
117. So, uh... any allergies?Copy !req
118. Not that I know of.Copy !req
119. - Are you an epileptic?
- No.Copy !req
120. Taking any prescription drugs...Copy !req
121. that could have a negative interaction
with a tear gas...Copy !req
122. - No.
- Nerve toxins?Copy !req
123. No.Copy !req
124. Napal— I'm sorry.
I gotta ask all this stuff.Copy !req
125. OK, I'm just gonna throw
a few things out there...Copy !req
126. and on a scale of one to ten,
I want you to tell me...Copy !req
127. how much menace
you experience. OK?Copy !req
128. - Hand grenades?
- Two.Copy !req
129. - Flamethrowers?
- Two.Copy !req
130. OK... Spiders?Copy !req
131. - Giant or regular?
- Regular.Copy !req
132. I don't know. Like, one.Copy !req
133. - Giant spiders?
- Three.Copy !req
134. Are you sure? Giant spiders...Copy !req
135. - Maybe you wanna go to "four"?
- Fine, four!Copy !req
136. Look, is this gonna take all day?Copy !req
137. Hey, I'm just trying to get
ya the biggest bang...Copy !req
138. for your arching buck here.Copy !req
139. We're almost done. Sit tight.Copy !req
140. Wha-what— what are you writing?Copy !req
141. "Impatient."Copy !req
142. Your response to the test
is part of the test.Copy !req
143. Oh, come on!Copy !req
144. Vicious attack dogs!Copy !req
145. And honestly, I don't think
they should be with the others.Copy !req
146. - They're delicate.
- Fine. They can stay here.Copy !req
147. But only until we get them
their own henchman uniforms.Copy !req
148. Really? Oh, thank you, sweetie.Copy !req
149. It'll mean so much to them.Copy !req
150. Tim-Tom! Kevin!Copy !req
151. He said it's OK!Copy !req
152. Yeah, yeah.Copy !req
153. What are you doing?Copy !req
154. What? Putting our bed—Copy !req
155. What are you two, cats?Copy !req
156. You're not sleeping
at the foot of my bed!Copy !req
157. There are 20 rooms
in this house! Find one!Copy !req
158. Well...Copy !req
159. I gotta roll out.Copy !req
160. I got a soirée at 1800 hours...Copy !req
161. and I still gotta go
to the Costco on the way homeCopy !req
162. to pick up some party platters.Copy !req
163. I just wanna say again how much
I'm looking forward...Copy !req
164. to working with you, Venture.Copy !req
165. I think we're gonna have
a real blast together.Copy !req
166. Ooh, speaking of which—Copy !req
167. Whoa! Hey!Copy !req
168. Oh, rubber bullets!
Rubber bullets.Copy !req
169. Just keeping it lively.Copy !req
170. It's not all charts and schedules.Copy !req
171. Wow!Copy !req
172. Man, he's a delicate one, isn't he?Copy !req
173. They usually don't break
the skin like that, I—Copy !req
174. - Malice troop!
- Sir.Copy !req
175. Yeah, we got a bleeder here.Copy !req
176. 86 the non-lethal.Copy !req
177. We're going full Nerf on this one.Copy !req
178. No.Copy !req
179. Geez, look at this guy.Copy !req
180. Alright, I'll be back
in an hour or so.Copy !req
181. I'm just gonna make
an appearance to be polite.Copy !req
182. - You sure you don't wanna come?
- Positive.Copy !req
183. I'm just gonna curl up
with the new Guild face book.Copy !req
184. Maybe pick a new arch.Copy !req
185. That's my old Monarch.Copy !req
186. You'll see, honey,
once you're back arching...Copy !req
187. everything will be just like it was.Copy !req
188. Yeah, yeah.Copy !req
189. Oh, be sure and tell Hatred "die" for me.Copy !req
190. Professor Flowers?Copy !req
191. Douche.Copy !req
192. Well, hello, Dr. Venture.Copy !req
193. Oh, hello.Copy !req
194. - I didn't expect to see you here.
- Nor did I.Copy !req
195. Is this number five?Copy !req
196. Well yeah, but—Copy !req
197. Oh, I see, yeah.Copy !req
198. You're looking for Sgt. Hatred.Copy !req
199. Well, I was, but I'd say
I found something better.Copy !req
200. Yeah. I guess it's a typo.Copy !req
201. He's right next door.Copy !req
202. Just follow the cul-de-sac...Copy !req
203. to the house with the big "H"
on the lawn.Copy !req
204. You can't miss it.Copy !req
205. I don't even know
why we're doing this.Copy !req
206. We kinda have to.Copy !req
207. It's just one of the things
that comes with this life you chose.Copy !req
208. "Chose," my keister!Copy !req
209. My dad dumped this life in my lap...Copy !req
210. like a cup of
scalding hot responsibility.Copy !req
211. H-honey, wait up.Copy !req
212. What the hell's bells
are they doing here?Copy !req
213. What? You invited us.Copy !req
214. Yeah, you. But those two lookers
aren't 18, are they?Copy !req
215. - No, we're 16.
- Going on 17.Copy !req
216. You gotta get 'em outta here.Copy !req
217. I had some troubles back
before I met my wife.Copy !req
218. Long story short— I'm not
allowed to be within 50 feet...Copy !req
219. of a beautiful minor.Copy !req
220. Shoulda mentioned it back
at the Compound.Copy !req
221. Actually, I'm required by law.Copy !req
222. Aah, alright.Copy !req
223. Everybody back in the car.Copy !req
224. The buzzkill boys have ruined
another night.Copy !req
225. No, no, don't go!Copy !req
226. The party's just getting started!Copy !req
227. Hey, everybody, it's the Monarch!Copy !req
228. And Dr. Used to Be His Girlfriend.Copy !req
229. Oh, what does my best man
need, a babysitter?Copy !req
230. I got a floating rumpus room
right next door...Copy !req
231. full of guys with nothing to do.
Live a little...Copy !req
232. Doc, do you think that's a good idea?Copy !req
233. Stop your fussing.Copy !req
234. He's been clipped. He's harmless.Copy !req
235. Oooh, shrimp.Copy !req
236. Here, here.Copy !req
237. Come here, pin these
on your backs and come on in.Copy !req
238. I'm sure you know the gang.Copy !req
239. Look at him! He's eating
all the cocktail shrimp.Copy !req
240. I hate guys who do that.Copy !req
241. Come on, it's a party.Copy !req
242. Please don't do anything stupid.Copy !req
243. OK, 24's out sick...Copy !req
244. so, uh, you guys can sleep in here.Copy !req
245. Well, good night.Copy !req
246. Wait, dude! It's like 8:00 at night.Copy !req
247. Yeah, whoo. And I am, bushed.Copy !req
248. Oh, don't even try that.Copy !req
249. Look, no offense, but I'm
in no mood to play babysitter...Copy !req
250. to the Ritalin twins tonight, OK?Copy !req
251. My life sucks quite enough
already, thank you.Copy !req
252. I have big boy problems.Copy !req
253. - Girls?
- I wish.Copy !req
254. Hemorrhoids?Copy !req
255. Time for fun!Copy !req
256. Now, everybody has the name
of a famous person...Copy !req
257. pinned to their backs.Copy !req
258. Everybody else will treat you
like the person on your tag.Copy !req
259. First one to guess gets a prize!Copy !req
260. Now mingle.Copy !req
261. Damn you, mingle!Copy !req
262. You're married to a powerful man.Copy !req
263. Uh, let's see...Copy !req
264. Mrs. Hulk Hogan?Copy !req
265. No. OK...Copy !req
266. you're famous for your pink suit
and pillbox hat.Copy !req
267. Uh, me?Copy !req
268. You're a brainless failure...Copy !req
269. and live entirely off your
father's name and fortune.Copy !req
270. - I'm George Bush?
- Hardly!Copy !req
271. I've never, never hated anyone
as much as you!Copy !req
272. Wait, wait... Hitler?Copy !req
273. Did he have a famous father?Copy !req
274. Worse! You wash up!Copy !req
275. You should just admit that you
will never amount to anything...Copy !req
276. and drink poison!Copy !req
277. Oh, is it... uh...Copy !req
278. Socrates' son?Copy !req
279. I loved you in
Fire Walk with Me...Copy !req
280. but most know your work in—Copy !req
281. Yeah, great, whatever.Copy !req
282. I'm Harry Dean Stanton.Copy !req
283. We have a winner!Copy !req
284. Oh, who the hell is
Jacqueline Onassis?Copy !req
285. Of course.Copy !req
286. Mariah Carey.Copy !req
287. So, close...Copy !req
288. Seriously, I would have gotten that.Copy !req
289. Hey, how you feeling?Copy !req
290. Like a dwarf stuck a knife in me.Copy !req
291. How do you think I feel?Copy !req
292. Did you bring my... magazines?Copy !req
293. No, I brought something
way better.Copy !req
294. I got someone here who came
to cheer you up.Copy !req
295. He remembered?Copy !req
296. Hey, there, glum chum!Copy !req
297. Alright, well, I'm gonna
leave you two to catch up.Copy !req
298. Good idea!Copy !req
299. This room is officially quarantined!Copy !req
300. 'Cause smiles are contagious.Copy !req
301. I hate you.Copy !req
302. R and D. Yeah, this is where
my troops create...Copy !req
303. all my cutting edge equipment.Copy !req
304. Yeah, we have similar stuff
over at the Cocoon.Copy !req
305. - Only they're yellow.
- Sure you do.Copy !req
306. You got one of these?
30 dart repeater.Copy !req
307. All the darts are stored
right here in the butt.Copy !req
308. Yeah, standard issue.Copy !req
309. Hmm. Well.Copy !req
310. What about this little number?Copy !req
311. Looks like a comm link,
but if you hit this—Copy !req
312. Yeah, yeah, you hit that
button and it converts to a grapple gun.Copy !req
313. - We have those, too.
- Hmm.Copy !req
314. Well, here's a little something
that we just developed.Copy !req
315. Micro explosives!Copy !req
316. You just stick this little
number on your target...Copy !req
317. set the timer, and it delivers
a blast of pin-point energy...Copy !req
318. right where you want it.Copy !req
319. Nice. I-I-I'm sure my men...Copy !req
320. are working on something
just like that.Copy !req
321. Well, of course they are.Copy !req
322. I met your crack team of henchmen.Copy !req
323. Impressive group of boys.Copy !req
324. Impressive.Copy !req
325. Ooh! I gotta show you my battle room.Copy !req
326. You will love this!Copy !req
327. Come on!Copy !req
328. Oh, I'm right behind ya!Copy !req
329. We leave the gas on...Copy !req
330. they go in their sleep,
all quiet like.Copy !req
331. Aw, I wanted to hear 'em scream.Copy !req
332. It's not as much fun...Copy !req
333. but it'll look more
like an accident.Copy !req
334. Then the Monarch won't be
expecting it when we—Copy !req
335. That's your big problem?Copy !req
336. You're scared of two little babies!Copy !req
337. Dude, get back. They'll see you!Copy !req
338. You got me all worked up.Copy !req
339. - You said they had claws!
- Get back!Copy !req
340. Alright, so I exaggerated a little.Copy !req
341. Did you see what they did to 24?Copy !req
342. They're like nasty, swearing
spider monkeys with knives.Copy !req
343. Holy smokes!Copy !req
344. That lady is...Copy !req
345. is in her birthday suit.Copy !req
346. I think they're watching
no-no movies.Copy !req
347. They're not. They're watching Nell.Copy !req
348. And that's my DVD!Copy !req
349. Dude, I think I just saw
Schindler's dingus.Copy !req
350. Shh.Copy !req
351. This sucks. When does she meet
Hannibal Lecter?Copy !req
352. Chikka-paw... Shut the fuck up!Copy !req
353. Bitch is killing me.Copy !req
354. I don't remember this part.
Is this the director's cut?Copy !req
355. Dude, holy crap!Copy !req
356. Book!Copy !req
357. Aw, sweet infinity shot, though.Copy !req
358. It was 21. I saw him.Copy !req
359. I counted two piggies. Who's he with?Copy !req
360. Who the hell you think?Copy !req
361. Thought he was still in sick bay.Copy !req
362. We must be losing our touch.Copy !req
363. Well, let's get it back.Copy !req
364. No, no, no. No apologies necessary.Copy !req
365. It's all fair in love and war.Copy !req
366. Well, I just assumed that
the magic we shared that night...Copy !req
367. was something bigger
than the both of us.Copy !req
368. Yeah, nothing happened.Copy !req
369. Well if it did happen...Copy !req
370. it was only because I didn't
know who you were.Copy !req
371. Nothing happened.Copy !req
372. Many women have hit on me
because of my fame.Copy !req
373. - Nothing happened!
- And some just sense the inner animal.Copy !req
374. Pheromones. Ladies pick up on it.Copy !req
375. Ugh! Nothing happened!Copy !req
376. Are you sensing anything now?Copy !req
377. My smell perhaps?Copy !req
378. Meow...Copy !req
379. So then my dad gets remarried, right—Copy !req
380. to my ex-girlfriend!Copy !req
381. - It's almost incest.
- It's almost a Greek myth.Copy !req
382. Dude, hide us!Copy !req
383. 21 and 24...Copy !req
384. get your asses out here!Copy !req
385. They ain't in 24's room.Copy !req
386. Come on out, ladies.
We just wanna talk.Copy !req
387. Wait a minute...
why do they want me?Copy !req
388. What did I do?Copy !req
389. What did you do?Copy !req
390. Brock, what the hell are
you doing?Copy !req
391. I'm watching this PBS special
on giant crossbows.Copy !req
392. - Why?
- Looked cool.Copy !req
393. Why aren't you protecting me?Copy !req
394. This is a den of thieves.Copy !req
395. Doc, it's a bad party.Copy !req
396. Granted, it's a party thrown
by your arch enemy.Copy !req
397. But these guys have codes.Copy !req
398. You're safer here than you are
at the Compound.Copy !req
399. Mmmm... OK you sure about that?Copy !req
400. No. I really wanna see these guys
shoot that crossbow.Copy !req
401. Thing's huge.Copy !req
402. Hey, Venture, what are—Copy !req
403. Oh, you gotta keep this door closed
or the cat will get out.Copy !req
404. Is that what that thing was?Copy !req
405. I thought it was some guy
in a cat costume.Copy !req
406. I know, it's huge.Copy !req
407. I don't know what the heck
my wife feeds it.Copy !req
408. Son, you gotta get out there,
it's your party.Copy !req
409. People wanna meet my Dr. Venture.Copy !req
410. Come out, come out,
wherever you are!Copy !req
411. We have something for you two,
a little present.Copy !req
412. Tim-Tom!Copy !req
413. Look what I found.Copy !req
414. Well, hello...Copy !req
415. - What's this?
- Damn, even his dot is fat.Copy !req
416. Flying! Flying!Copy !req
417. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest!Copy !req
418. - You're flying! Bird!
- We know he's a bird!Copy !req
419. He's been doing the same thing
for five fucking minutes!Copy !req
420. OK, my God! Go to the next word!Copy !req
421. Birdman of Alcatraz!Copy !req
422. Next clue! Do a sounds like!
You're killing me!Copy !req
423. Time!Copy !req
424. Birdy!Copy !req
425. Birdy! It was Birdy!Copy !req
426. Oh, with Nicolas Cage.Copy !req
427. Nice job. Would been nice if you told us
it was one word, though.Copy !req
428. Let me show you how it's done.Copy !req
429. OK, go.Copy !req
430. - It's a movie.
- Duh.Copy !req
431. No talking.Copy !req
432. The Scorpion King?Copy !req
433. Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo!Copy !req
434. Boom! That's how it's done!Copy !req
435. Nope, you talked. I can't count it.Copy !req
436. Hatred!Copy !req
437. Mark my words—Copy !req
438. Blah, blah, blah.Copy !req
439. We're all super villains here, Monarch.Copy !req
440. We've heard that speech 1,000 times.Copy !req
441. You don't get the point.Copy !req
442. I've reopened my pancreas.Copy !req
443. I'm bleeding internally.Copy !req
444. Dude, we're all gonna be bleeding
if you don't suck it up.Copy !req
445. - You suck it up.
- You suck it up!Copy !req
446. There they are!Copy !req
447. Ah, th-th-this way!Copy !req
448. Aw, shit.Copy !req
449. It sounds like an excellent
idea, actually.Copy !req
450. You should give him a call!Copy !req
451. Hi, sweetie, Hatred was just telling me...Copy !req
452. he used to arch
Commander Consummate...Copy !req
453. and thinks he'd be
a perfect match for us.Copy !req
454. I'm not that interested—Copy !req
455. Are you smoking?Copy !req
456. - Who?
- You.Copy !req
457. - Why?
- What why? Are you smoking?Copy !req
458. - Maybe.
- What?Copy !req
459. - When did you start smoking?
- 1989-ish.Copy !req
460. So you have been lying!Copy !req
461. It all makes sense—Copy !req
462. the filled ashtrays...Copy !req
463. the burning pine scented
hair spray.Copy !req
464. I guess I'll say it...Copy !req
465. her three pack a day voice?Copy !req
466. Why couldn't you just
tell me, you liar?Copy !req
467. - Because you would—
- Liar!Copy !req
468. - ... do that.
- Liar!Copy !req
469. You've gotta learn how to relax, son.Copy !req
470. You got that hot little filly now.Copy !req
471. I know she used to keep
Phantom Limb pretty relaxed—Copy !req
472. Don't you dare bring him up!Copy !req
473. Ooh, sore spot.Copy !req
474. I know just the thing
that'll help you relax.Copy !req
475. Take off your clothes!Copy !req
476. Shh.Copy !req
477. What is that?
Why do I know that sound?Copy !req
478. Is it... Pac Man?Copy !req
479. No, Pac Man was...Copy !req
480. we we, we we, we we,
we we wib wib!Copy !req
481. That's when you die.Copy !req
482. When you're just eating pellets
it's more like...Copy !req
483. duh duh, duh duh
duh duh, duh duh.Copy !req
484. Oh, wait it's a Monarch-issue
radar troop tracker.Copy !req
485. Of course, duh.Copy !req
486. Dude, the chip
in our uniforms!Copy !req
487. They can totally track us!Copy !req
488. Don't those jets feel great?Copy !req
489. Yeah, great.Copy !req
490. Ooh, we should call your hot
filly and Vaingloria over...Copy !req
491. to add some peach to this brew.Copy !req
492. Oh, I remember when your woman
was with Phantom Limb.Copy !req
493. OK, OK! Enough!
You have been on me all night!Copy !req
494. You invite me over to watch
my sworn enemy eat—Copy !req
495. Whoa! You mean my sworn enemy!Copy !req
496. And the needling,
and the Phantom Limb crap!Copy !req
497. What do you have against me, anyway?Copy !req
498. I'm a changed man, Monarch.Copy !req
499. There's less hatred in this old...Copy !req
500. Hatred.Copy !req
501. But I'm not an imbecile.Copy !req
502. I have been sitting back
and watching you...Copy !req
503. and your fat, worthless henchmen
rob me blind.Copy !req
504. What?Copy !req
505. Th-tha-that's insane!Copy !req
506. Yeah, keep it up.Copy !req
507. Keep treating me like
a doddering old man.Copy !req
508. Look, you scrawny little turd...Copy !req
509. I was a professional villain...Copy !req
510. while you were trading
Garbage Pail Kids!Copy !req
511. I learned how to bide my time...Copy !req
512. and strike when the troops
are in position.Copy !req
513. You can't touch me, Grandpa.Copy !req
514. The Guild would bury you!Copy !req
515. No, you'll be fine.Copy !req
516. You'll live to see me treat your arch rival
like a god damn king!Copy !req
517. Venture is my arch enemy now!Copy !req
518. And I'm an gonna cook him
breakfast in bed!Copy !req
519. I am gonna make his life wonderful.Copy !req
520. And you can't do squat about it!Copy !req
521. Ha! Think the Monarch
can be bested so easily?Copy !req
522. Good Lord, sit down.Copy !req
523. Oh, deal with it.Copy !req
524. And deal with this!Copy !req
525. While you were cheating
at party games, I planted...Copy !req
526. your micro explosive at
the base of Venture's spine.Copy !req
527. In minutes, he will be dead!
In your home!Copy !req
528. Your career as a villain will be over!Copy !req
529. And I will have destroyed
both of my enemies...Copy !req
530. in one fell swoop!Copy !req
531. Alright, fine! I'll take a soak.Copy !req
532. My man is insisting that I spend...Copy !req
533. some get-to-know-you time
with my antagonists.Copy !req
534. Not sure why.Copy !req
535. Lights out.Copy !req
536. Lights out, boys.Copy !req
537. I know, it's impressive.Copy !req
538. Eh, looks like Rusty's inheritedCopy !req
539. more than his father's
startling intellect.Copy !req
540. Yeah!Copy !req
541. Yep, just as Mother Nature made me.Copy !req
542. Why tamper with perfection?Copy !req
543. Ahh, what the—Copy !req
544. Damn.Copy !req
545. Oops. Sorry gentlemen.Copy !req
546. Must be all that shrimp.Copy !req
547. Help! The shrimps have knives!Copy !req
548. Uh, you know, you guys...Copy !req
549. didn't have to take your clothes off, too.Copy !req
550. Well, I saw you guys doing it
and I thought "water slide!"Copy !req
551. It's part of my DNA, I think.Copy !req
552. Uh, I don't know...Copy !req
553. I guess what
I've really always wanted to do...Copy !req
554. was be a cabinet maker.Copy !req
555. I say follow your dreams.Copy !req
556. Even if they are about a giant
spider with your father's head...Copy !req
557. and he keeps stealing your penis.Copy !req
558. Boys, come on! We're going!Copy !req
559. Good night, boys.Copy !req
560. Uh, hey, you sure you don't
wanna have a little sleep over?Copy !req
561. The wife's at her mother's...Copy !req
562. and I've got a basement
full of video games.Copy !req
563. Eh? Maybe a shower?Copy !req