The Twilight Zone 2x4

Directed by David Orrick McDearmon

Margarita Cordova as Girl on TV • Richard Haydn as Bartlett Finchley • Barbara Stuart as Edith • Barney Phillips as TV Repairman • Henry Beckman as Policeman

A writer feels that the machines in his house are conspiring against him.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. Shared by http://DJJ.HOME.SAPO.PT/

2. You're traveling through another dimension-

3. a dimension not only of sight and sound, but of mind.

4. A journey into a wondrous land

5. whose boundaries are that of imagination.

6. That's the signpost up ahead.

7. Your next stop, the twilight zone.

8. How are you today, mr. Finchley?

9. I'll answer that burning question after you tell me

10. what's wrong with that miracle of modern science,

11. and also exactly how much this current larceny

12. is going to cost me.

13. Well, there's two hours labor,

14. broken set of tubes,

15. new oscillator and a new filter.

16. How very technical, and how very convincing.

17. I presume I'm to be dunned once again

18. for three times the worth of the blasted thing.

19. Last time I was over here,

20. you'd kicked your foot through the screen.

21. Remember?

22. I have a vivid recollection, thank you.

23. The set was not working properly.

24. I tried to get it to do so in a perfectly normal fashion.

25. By kicking your foot through the screen?

26. Why didn't you just horsewhip it, mr. Finchley?

27. That'd show it who's boss.

28. Supposing we stop this moronic small talk, shall we,

29. and get down to some serious larceny?

30. You may read me off the damages.

31. Although I sometimes wonder

32. what exactly is the purpose

33. of the better business bureau

34. when it allows itinerant extortionists like you

35. to come back week after week,

36. move wires around,

37. busily probe with ham-like hands,

38. and achieve nothing but the financial ruin

39. of every customer.

40. We're not a gyp outfit, mr. Finchley.

41. We're legitimate repairmen.

42. But I'll tell you something

43. about yourself.

44. That tv set doesn't work

45. because, obviously, you got in back of it,

46. and you yanked out a lot of wires,

47. and I don't know what else.

48. Now, a month ago, you called me over here

49. to fix your portable radio

50. because you threw it downstairs.

51. That did not work properly either.

52. Well, that's the point, mr. Finchley.

53. Why don't they work properly?

54. Offhand, I'd say it's because you don't treat them properly.

55. I assume there'll be an extra charge

56. for that analysis?

57. What does go wrong with these things, mr. Finchley?

58. Have you got any idea?

59. Aside from being a rather incompetent clod,

60. you're a very unreceptive man.

61. I have already explained to you,

62. the television set simply did not work properly.

63. And, as for that marconi original

64. operating under the guise of a modern radio,

65. that gave nothing but static.

66. Are you sure that's all that was wrong with them?

67. All right, mr. Finchley, I'll send you a bill.

68. Of that I have no doubt.

69. Finchley, what is it with you and machines?

70. I shall file that idiotic question

71. in my memorabilia

72. to be referred to at some future date

73. when I write my memoirs.

74. You, my good friend,

75. will fill one entire chapter

76. entitled, "the most forgettable person I ever met."

77. It just so happens that every machine in this house is...

78. all right.

79. That will be enough of that.

80. Do you hear me?

81. I said that will be enough of that!

82. Stop!

83. Stop!

84. This is mr. Bartlett finchley, age 48,

85. a practicing sophisticate

86. who writes very special and very precious things

87. for gourmet magazines and the like.

88. He's a bachelor and a recluse with few friends,

89. only devotees and adherents to the cause of tart sophistry.

90. He has no interests save whatever current annoyances

91. he can put his mind to.

92. He has no purpose to his life

93. except the formulation of day-to-day opportunities

94. to vent his wrath on mechanical contrivances

95. of an age he abhors.

96. In short, mr. Bartlett finchley is a malcontent,

97. born either too late or too early in the century,

98. and who, in just a moment, will enter a realm

99. where muscles and the will to fight back

100. are not limited to human beings.

101. Next stop for mr. Bartlett finchley- the twilight zone.

102. Miss rogers.

103. Is this all you've done?

104. That's all I've done.

105. That's 30 pages

106. in three hours and a half.

107. That's the best I can do, mr. Finchley.

108. It's that idiotic machine-

109. that typewriter of yours.

110. Thomas jefferson wrote the entire

111. declaration of independence with a feather quill,

112. and it took him only half a day.

113. Why don't you hire mr. Jefferson?

114. Miss rogers, did I ever tell you

115. with what degree of distaste

116. I view insubordination?

117. Often and endlessly.

118. I'll tell you what, mr. Finchley.

119. You get yourself another girl-

120. one with three arms,

121. and with roughly the same sensitivity

122. as an alligator.

123. Then you can work together

124. till death do you part.

125. As for me...

126. I've had it.

127. And you are going where?

128. Anyplace where I can be away from the highly articulate,

129. oh, so sophisticated, bon vivant of america's winers and diners-

130. a mr. Bartlett finchley.

131. You even got me talking like you.

132. Miss rogers, please.

133. Don't leave.

134. I beg your pardon?

135. I do wish you'd...

136. I wish you'd stay for a bit.

137. Oh, I don't mean for work or anything.

138. All that can wait.

139. I was just thinking

140. that we could have dinner or something.

141. The theater perhaps?

142. How very sweet, mr. Finchley. Thank you.

143. But no thank you.

144. Good-bye, mr. Finchley.

145. Before you go, miss rogers... before you go...

146. yes?

147. I'd like very much...

148. I'd like very much not to be alone for a while.

149. Are you ill?

150. Bad news or something?

151. No.

152. What's your trouble?

153. Does there have to be trouble just because I...?

154. I'm desperately tired.

155. I haven't slept for four nights.

156. Quite frankly, the thought of being alone just now

157. is intolerable, miss rogers.

158. Things have been happening...

159. very odd things.

160. Go on.

161. That television machine in there...

162. it goes on late at night and wakes me up.

163. Just goes on all by itself.

164. That radio I kept in the bedroom-

165. that went on and off, too,

166. just when I was going to sleep.

167. There's a conspiracy in this house, miss rogers.

168. Conspiracy?

169. That's exactly what it is. A conspiracy!

170. The television set, the radio, the clock...

171. even that miserable car I drive.

172. Last night, I drove it into the driveway-

173. just drove it into the driveway, mind you-

174. very carefully, very slowly.

175. The steering wheel turned in my hand-

176. it twisted itself in my hand.

177. The car deliberately hit the side of the garage.

178. It smashed a headlight.

179. It cost $140.

180. That clock... over the mantelpiece.

181. Oh, uh... I threw it away.

182. What I'm getting at, miss rogers,

183. is that, for as long as I have lived,

184. I have never been able to operate machines.

185. Mr. Finchley, I think you ought to see a doctor.

186. A doctor?

187. The universal panacea of the dreamless 20th-century idiot.

188. If you're depressed, see a doctor.

189. If you're happy, see a doctor.

190. If the salary is too low

191. and the mortgage is too high, see a doctor.

192. You, miss rogers... yousee a doctor.

193. I am a logical, rational, intelligent man.

194. I know what I see.

195. I know what I hear.

196. And for the past three months, I've been seeing and hearing

197. a collection of mechanical frankensteinian monsters

198. whose whole purpose is to destroy me.

199. Now, what do you think of that, miss rogers?

200. I think you're terribly ill

201. and you need medical attention.

202. I also think that you're suffering

203. from a bad case of nerves due to lack of sleep

204. and that way down deep you yourself realize

205. that these are nothing more than delusions.

206. I will not be intimidated by machines.

207. So it follows that no empty-headed little female

208. with a mechanical face can do anything to me either.

209. Mr. Finchley, in this conspiracy you speak of,

210. this mortal combat between you and the appliances,

211. I hope you lose.

212. Get out!

213. "Get out of here, finchley."

214. Getoutof here, finchley!

215. Who are you to tell me to get out of here?

216. No, no, this is absurd.

217. It's a typewriter...

218. a device...

219. an inanimate, senseless machine.

220. Get out of here, finchley.

221. Whydon'tyou get out of here, finchley?

222. All right.

223. All right, you machines.

224. You're not going to intimidate me.

225. Do you hear me?

226. You are not going to intimidate me.

227. You...

228. you machines!

229. Miss moore, please.

230. Oh, agatha.

231. Bartlett finchley here.

232. How are you, my dear?

233. Yes, it has been a long time- too long-

234. which, indeed, prompts this call.

235. How about dinner tonight?

236. Oh.

237. I see.

238. Yes, well, of course, it is short notice, but I...

239. hmm. Of course.

240. All right, I'll, uh... I'll call you again... my dear.

241. Mrs. Donnelly, please.

242. Oh, pauline, is this you?

243. And how is my favorite, attractive young widow?

244. Bartlett.

245. Bartlett finchley.

246. Yes, I was just wondering if...

247. oh.

248. Oh, I see.

249. Well, I'm delighted, I'm simply delighted.

250. I'll send you a wedding present.

251. Of course.

252. Good night.

253. Telephones.

254. Just like the rest.

255. Exactly like all the rest.

256. Their whole existence dedicated to embarrassing me

257. or irritating me or making my life miserable.

258. Well, who needs you?

259. Who needs any of you?

260. Whydon'tyou get out of here, finchley?

261. Whydon't you get out of here, finchley?

262. Whydon'tyou get out of here, finchley?

263. Get out of here, finchley!

264. Get out of here, finchley!

265. She rolled down the driveway,

266. almost hit a kid on a bike.

267. You ought to check that emergency brake, mister.

268. The emergency brake was on.

269. Oh, no, it wasn't.

270. Or if it was, it isn't working properly.

271. She rolled down the driveway and right out into the street.

272. You're lucky it didn't hit anyone.

273. Monster.

274. You got the keys?

275. Yes. Oh, they're in the house.

276. Well, you better pull it back up into the garage.

277. And you ought to check that emergency brake

278. the first chance you get, understand, mister?

279. All right, dear friends.

280. You may remain on my property

281. goggling at this astonishing sight

282. for another three and a half minutes.

283. If, when I return with my car keys,

284. you are not off my property,

285. I shall enlist the aid of this underpaidgendarme

286. to forcibly eject you.

287. Idiots.

288. "Get out of here, finchley."

289. No.

290. Get out of here, finchley.

291. Why don't you get out of here, finchley?

292. Whydon'tyou get out of here, finchley?

293. Get out of here, finchley!

294. Get out of here.

295. Get out of here, finchley.

296. No, I won't!

297. I won't!

298. Get out of here!

299. You pulled the body out?

300. Yeah.

301. It's funny, they usually float.

302. What do you mean, usually?

303. He was on the bottom.

304. He hadn't come up.

305. He wasn't weighted either.

306. There was nothing to hold him down.

307. His eyes were open, he looked scared

308. like something had been chasing him or something.

309. The neighbors said that he'd been shouting

310. and running around last night.

311. I wonder what it was that could have scared him?

312. Whatever it was, it's a little item he took along with him.

313. Yeah. Maybe he was drunk-

314. imagining things?

315. Maybe.

316. Could be he had a heart attack or something.

317. Could be.

318. It could just be.

319. Yes, it could just be.

320. It could just be that mr. Bartlett finchley succumbed

321. from a heart attack and a set of delusions.

322. It could just be that he was tormented by an imagination

323. as sharp as his wit and as pointed as his dislikes.

324. But as perceived by those attending,

325. this is one explanation that has left the premises

326. with the deceased.

327. Look for it filed under "m" for machines

328. in the twilight zone.

329. Captioned by media access group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org

330. rod serling, the creator oftwilight zone,

331. will tell you about next week's story

332. after this word from our alternate sponsor.

333. And now, mr. Serling.

334. Down this hall is a very strange individual

335. locked in a room.

336. He's known by various names and by various forms,

337. and next week onthe twilight zone,

338. you'll be close to the elbow of the people who let him out.

339. Our story is called "the howling man,"

340. by mr. Charles bowman.

341. It's designed for the young in heart but the strong of nerve.

342. I hope we'll see you next week, along with "the howling man."

343. Thank you, and good night.

344. Come to the aid of your party.