1. Yo. Hey. What is so important?
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2. Why couldn't you tell me
whatever this is over the phone, huh?
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3. 'Cause I wanted to see your
stupid face when I told you.
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4. Okay. You know that teaser
poster we released yesterday?
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5. Yeah. The Kool-Aid one, yeah?
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6. It has gotten more positive
online engagement
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7. than any teaser poster released by anyone
in the last five fucking years!
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8. It's fucking destroying.
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9. - Wait, are you serious right now?
- I am fucking dead serious.
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10. - I'm fucking dead serious, man. Yeah.
- Oh, my God.
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11. How is this happening?
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12. You know, I think it's just
the perfect storm
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13. of nostalgia, kitsch, irony and stupidity.
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14. Fucking people are just loving
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15. - the fucking Kool-Aid right now.
- Oh, my God.
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16. - Oh, yeah!
- Oh, yeah!
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17. - Yeah! Oh, yeah.
- Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!
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18. - Oh, yeah.
- Oh, yeah.
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19. - Yeah!
- We're gonna make a billion dollars!
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20. We're gonna make
a fucking billion dollars!
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21. - Do you wanna make out right now?
- We can't do that anymore.
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22. - Are you sure?
- We said we wouldn't.
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23. - We're gonna be fucking rich!
- We're gonna make a billion dollars!
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24. - We're gonna be fucking rich! Yeah!
- Yeah, motherfucker!
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25. Okay.
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26. All right, on the heels
of the huge launch of our poster,
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27. we are gonna be all up
in Anaheim Comic-Con tomorrow
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28. announcing this dope cast!
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29. I got Nick Stoller to write a bit
for Ice Cube to come out during the panel.
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30. He's gonna, like, crash through the wall
as Kool-Aid, "Oh, yeah!"
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31. That's great. Stoller, he should
actually write a joke for me
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32. because I've decided
I'm personally gonna introduce
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33. Ice Cube as the Kool-Aid Man at Comic-Con.
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34. Look who's hopping on the
bandwagon now that it's got some heat.
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35. Well, you know,
I figured it's a, you know,
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36. good moment for me to show
confidence in the project.
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37. Also really, like, rub it in everyone's
fucking face who said this was gonna suck.
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38. - I mean, we got Biel, we got Duhamel...
- Yes.
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39. - ... we got Oh, we got Cube.
- Boom.
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40. I mean, how could you not be
excited about this cast?
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41. Yeah. How could you not be excited?
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42. I can't believe we got Ice Cube.
He is better than Kevin Hart.
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43. I still think Tracy Morgan
would have been so funny.
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44. "Who's thirsty?
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45. Somebody gettin' pregnant!"
You know, it would have been great.
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46. Sal, can you hang back?
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47. - Me too?
- No, you, out.
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48. - What happened?
- What's up?
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49. Okay, so,
we are loving the enthusiasm in this room.
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50. I'm just having, like...
I'm starting to have like a...
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51. a nagging concern
that something is really fucking sus.
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52. - Sus? Like bad?
- Yeah.
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53. This isn't sus at all. This is amazing.
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54. - Yeah, no, there's no sus...
- Are you kidding me?
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55. Look, I know Josh Duhamel's
not Mr. Comedy,
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56. - but he is so good looking and cool.
- He's funny enough.
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57. Duhamel is the least of my concerns.
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58. What is it? Just spit it out.
What's going on here?
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59. Okay, I'm starting to think
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60. that maybe casting Ice Cube
as the Kool-Aid Man
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61. could potentially be problematic.
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62. Why? You're the one who said we
should cast Ice Cube in the first place.
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63. You actually said for a musician,
he's remarkably unproblematic.
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64. - That's true.
- Oh, God.
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65. - Oh, my God.
- You see it?
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66. - Oh, no! Oh, fuck.
- What? What do you see?
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67. - What am I not seeing? What is happening?
- I know.
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68. - Okay. Fucking...
- Okay, just...
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69. What Maya is saying is that perhaps
we're playing into some stereotypes
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70. - because there might be...
- Oh, my God.
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71. a group of people who historically
enjoy Kool-Aid more than others.
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72. - I think that's what you were saying.
- Yeah, thank you.
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73. Fuck... Everyone enjoys Kool-Aid.
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74. I grew up drinking Kool-Aid.
Who doesn't like Kool-Aid?
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75. - I agree. It's fine.
- Yeah.
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76. - He doesn't see it, so we're—
- It's good.
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77. - Okay, great, great. I'll...
- Oh, no.
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78. - He's Black.
- Okay, you don't have to say it.
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79. - To say that out loud. We get it.
- Shit.
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80. Is this racist?
Did we do something racist?
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81. - Yeah, kinda.
- Okay, you guys,
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82. - this could be a major marketing issue.
- Oh, fuck.
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83. This is exactly the kind
of shit that social gets salty over.
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84. They're gonna tear us new assholes.
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85. That's gonna leave a stink on this whole,
beautiful thing.
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86. I always knew something
like this would happen to me.
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87. You know what,
I'm the whitest motherfucker in this room.
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88. Trust me, I will take the fall for this.
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89. - I'm dead.
- Are you kidding me?
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90. I am personally getting up in front of
thousands of people tomorrow
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91. and announcing this hate crime.
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92. Oh, God.
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93. Look, maybe we're just spinning out.
You know what I mean?
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94. Maybe it's like white guilt, you know,
and it's not a big deal.
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95. We should talk to Quinn.
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96. - Let's ask her, you know?
- Good idea.
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97. - She's very young and with-it...
- Yeah, she's got a cute bob.
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98. - She's not white.
- Don't say that. She's...
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99. - She's different. She's the same.
- She's not different! She's the same.
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100. - And I think that is so great.
- We're all the same.
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101. - Let's just head out.
- I think it's fucking great.
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102. - Knock, knock, knock. Hi.
- Hi.
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103. - Hey, girl.
- What's happening right now?
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104. Am I being fired?
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105. No, far from it. Yeah, you're actually of,
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106. very particular use at the moment.
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107. Great.
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108. - Let me just ask you.
- Yeah.
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109. Do you think it's weird
in any way, shape, or form
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110. that the Kool-Aid Man
is being voiced by a person of...
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111. Ice Cube?
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112. Why would that be weird?
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113. Maybe it wouldn't. There you go.
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114. - Thank you. Right, good. See?
- I feel a little bit better.
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115. Because Ice Cube's Black?
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116. We did not call Ice Cube Black,
just for the record.
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117. None of us called him Black.
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118. I mean, I guess I get your concern,
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119. but I've never really viewed
Kool-Aid as a Black person drink.
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120. - Okay, great.
- It's a poor person drink.
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121. - I don't wanna hear it.
- No.
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122. - Don't say that, please.
- That's a whole separate bad thing
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123. - you just said.
- People love Ice Cube, okay?
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124. - Just stick with him. It's fine.
- Okay.
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125. Respectfully, I don't think
Quinn is the spokesperson
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126. - for all peoples if you know what I mean?
- Yes, I never said I was.
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127. - Honey, give us a sec.
- Sal's right. Look,
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128. we need a much more
specific perspective on this.
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129. - You know what I'm saying? Who?
- Tyler.
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130. - My Tyler. You know, who run...
- Oh, yes, Tyler. Hard working, dedicated.
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131. - Very specific.
- Yes.
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132. He's running the photo shoot for
Ain't Yo Mama stage eight. Let's go.
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133. - Thank you, Quinn.
- Yeah, you're welcome.
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134. Hey.
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135. - I'm good with it.
- Oh, my God.
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136. Great. That's great news. Great news.
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137. Honestly, when you think about it, if you
didn't cast a Black man as Kool-Aid,
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138. - that would be more racist.
- Precisely, yes.
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139. That's exactly why we cast him.
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140. Thank you so much, Tyler.
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141. We so value and appreciate you.
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142. - Yes, thank you so much.
- No. Come here.
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143. I do not feel comfortable
speaking for all Black people.
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144. Oh, my God.
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145. Can't you just, like, rubber-stamp
it on their behalf for the time being?
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146. Anaheim Comic-Con is tomorrow, dude.
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147. No.
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148. Why don't we ask Ziwe and Lil Rel?
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149. Oh, yeah, great idea.
Can you ask them for us, please?
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150. No.
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151. I love Ice Cube as the Kool-Aid Man.
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152. - Great. Thank you.
- Dope. Dope AF.
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153. Okay, so, are y'all thinking Mrs. Kool
could be like Gabby Union, or...
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154. She is great, but no, it's not her.
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155. Is it Keke Palmer?
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156. - She slays, but no, it's not.
- Yes.
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157. No, it's not.
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158. Mrs. Kool's Black too though, right?
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159. Mrs. Kool is for sure a woman of color.
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160. - Yes.
- POC, hello. Yeah.
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161. Is the color Black?
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162. Her color is Korean.
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163. Is that not...
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164. - Is that bad?
- Well...
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165. Well, it's bad if you're
implying that a Black woman,
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166. is not good enough to be with
a successful Black man like Kool.
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167. No.
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168. Hey. No, I'm not implying that.
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169. I'm not. Look, I'm not implying... Look...
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170. Let me just make one thing clear.
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171. We are in no way saying
that a Black woman is not,
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172. good enough to be with a successful
Black man like the Kool-Aid Man.
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173. I think, if anything, I never viewed
the Kool-Aid Man
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174. as a successful Black man.
I didn't view him as a ma...
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175. He's a CGI glass jug
filled with red liquid.
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176. - He's not real, you know what I mean?
- It's all pretend.
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177. Sure. Look, I...
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178. All of that makes sense,
but really, when you think about it,
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179. if Kool-Aid is voiced by a Black man,
you know what that means.
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180. - Yes.
- That's...
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181. The thing is I very much
don't know what that means.
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182. Wake the fuck up.
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183. - Okay.
- Okay?
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184. Now I'll tell you what it means.
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185. It means that the Kool-Aid man
has the soul of a Black man...
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186. Yes.
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187. and he has the soul of a Black man
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188. because Ice Cube
is voicing that Black man.
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189. So Kool-Aid is Black.
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190. Kool-Aid is a Black man.
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191. The Kool-Aid man is...
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192. Black.
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193. - I feel that. Black man, yeah.
- Yeah, that makes sense now.
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194. - Thank you, guys.
- Thank you.
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195. - So, Sandra Oh is out as Mrs. Kool.
- Very informative.
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196. - Fucking fired. Done. Gone.
- Goddamn it.
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197. All right, I got it.
Are you ready for this shit?
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198. Here we go.
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199. - Regina King as Mrs. Kool.
- Okay, great.
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200. - I like that, yeah.
- Love her. Obsessed.
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201. Now... Wait, we have to recast the daughter.
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202. - Why?
- 'Cause she's half Asian.
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203. You want "who's the father"
questions coming up?
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204. We might as well burn
a cross at Comic-Con.
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205. - Why did I agree to introduce this panel?
- God, slow down, motherfucker.
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206. My hair.
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207. And booyah. Look at that.
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208. That feels good. That is progress,
you know what I mean?
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209. What?
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210. I mean, is it weird that all of
the live-action characters are white,
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211. and all of the non-white actors are CG?
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212. And so then, the only actual human faces
we see on camera are white faces.
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213. - Yes, the answer's yes.
- Right.
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214. That's obviously very fucking weird.
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215. We can't have a segregated cast.
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216. How did we not see this until right now?
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217. I think maybe because we had Sandra Oh.
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218. She kind of, like, offset the whole thing.
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219. Okay, here's what we're gonna do,
Josh Duhamel, he's fucking gone,
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220. and Don Cheadle,
he's the new live-action dad.
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221. Matt, the cast we had this
morning is so fine, okay?
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222. This is all making it a lot worse.
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223. Okay, we can't have Biel and Cheadle
because of the white wife thing.
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224. - Fuck, she's right.
- Because of what?
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225. Because if Don Cheadle
is married to a whitey,
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226. then that could be construed
as possibly problematic to Black women.
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227. - Do you want that? Okay.
- Okay, no.
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228. But you're telling me that
interracial marriage is now regressive?
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229. I've exclusively dated white men.
Does that make me a racist person?
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230. Honestly, it might.
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231. Holy shit, I got it.
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232. Lesbians.
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233. Two white lesbians with a Asian child.
Is that anything?
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234. Does their gayness
mitigate their whiteness?
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235. Okay, I'm sorry, I love lesbians,
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236. but white women are the fucking worst
right now. They're so toxic.
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237. Okay, you are a white woman.
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238. How dare you? My dad is from Cyprus.
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239. I got it. I fucking got it.
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240. We make them all Black, baby.
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241. We Black Panther this shit,
you know what I mean?
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242. That's unassailable.
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243. - That's doing the work, you know?
- Yeah.
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244. - Boom. You ready for this?
- Yeah.
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245. Watch this. Don Cheadle as the dad.
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246. - Keke Palmer as the mom.
- Love it.
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247. And this will be a young Black actor TBD.
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248. - Okay, I can sell it.
- Boom.
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249. Great. This actually makes it
feel important almost now, you know?
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250. This could be like our Hamilton.
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251. Okay, wait, hold on.
Stoller's at the production office
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252. with the writers right now,
and they're working on a new draft
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253. - so we should probably—
- Okay, I'll give them the note myself.
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254. - Right. Wow.
- Maya, you come with me.
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255. - Okay. Coming.
- Let's get these white losers off.
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256. - Totally. Yeah.
- Bye white losers. Bye-bye.
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257. There's a lot of enthusiasm internally
for this new version of the film.
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258. Yeah, we think that
it's more of the moment...
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259. - No. More fresh.
- Exactly.
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260. Yeah. Lots of new opportunities for comedy
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261. will come from the new casting, you know?
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262. Totally. Super-duper fresh.
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263. Yeah, so, Nick, as the director
you think you can pull this off?
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264. So, we're talking about
an almost entirely new cast?
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265. - Yes.
- Yeah.
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266. Which would require substantial rewrites.
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267. - Yes.
- Definitely.
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268. - Yeah.
- And we're f...
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269. we're five weeks out from shooting.
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270. I mean, yeah, we could do this.
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271. - Great. Perfect. Love that.
- We got this. Yeah...
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272. You got this. Yeah.
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273. - What do you guys...
- I mean, it's...
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274. - Wow.
- ... it's certainly an exciting new version
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275. of the Kool-Aid man story.
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276. - Yes. Yeah. Wow. Yeah.
- Great.
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277. But...
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278. are we 100% sure we should
be the writers on this movie now?
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279. Why not?
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280. - You guys have been rocking it.
- Yeah.
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281. Because it would be way
out of our wheelhouse.
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282. - Definitely.
- It's a comedy.
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283. You guys are comedy writers.
That is the definition of wheelhouse.
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284. Yeah, but... We're...
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285. We're talking about
the live-action family and...
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286. You want them to be Black.
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287. We can't do that.
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288. Like, then... What, we're taking jobs
from Black writers?
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289. - Like, we c... I mean, we couldn't.
- I'd hate that.
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290. Okay, so can you help me understand this?
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291. Yeah.
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292. You can write then
for one Black person, but—
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293. But now it's all Black people.
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294. So in an attempt to not be racist,
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295. you're limiting the amount of Black people
you're willing to write for?
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296. Look, if this is the path
you guys are gonna go down...
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297. I don't think we can work on this anymore.
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298. Well, this is very much 100%
the path we're gonna go down.
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299. - We vetted it with Lil Rel. Okay?
- Yeah, it's vetted.
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300. - We are so sorry.
- We're sorry.
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301. - Thank you. That's it.
- Wow. Thank you.
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302. We believe in the project, it's...
It isn't easy.
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303. Thank you so much.
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304. - Thank you, we'll... See you. Yes.
- Hey, best of luck on this.
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305. Thank you.
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306. - We should have lunch, guys.
- We'd love that.
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307. That'd be great. Thank you. Thanks.
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308. I'll rewrite the whole thing.
I don't give a shit.
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309. - I'll rewrite the entire thing.
- Thank you. Thank you, Nick.
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310. - I got it.
- I knew you would. Thank you, man.
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311. - There he is.
- Thank God.
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312. Oh, and Matt,
just one quick housekeeping thing...
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313. - Yeah.
- Just a little thing...
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314. - So in order to hit the dates...
- Yeah.
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315. on our budget,
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316. and given these...
The substantial changes that we just...
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317. - Yeah.
- I just received,
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318. - which I love and are awesome...
- Great.
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319. I'm going to have to bring on an animation
company that is primarily artificial.
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320. - Like, AI artificial?
- Yeah, artificial...
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321. - Like, artificial intelligence.
- Artificial intelligence?
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322. Can't you hire more human animators?
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323. - It's like two to three million dollars...
- That's too much. Don't do that.
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324. for each one. Yeah, but I'm talking
about the eyebrow... Little things.
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325. - Eyebrows.
- Eyebrows, eyeballs, like...
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326. Nobody even gives a shit about that.
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327. - Yeah, that's fine.
- Maybe a background.
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328. Okay, do what you gotta do,
just, you know, keep it under wraps.
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329. - Just on there. Okay. Yeah.
- Just sprinkle it on there. Not too much.
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330. Yeah, I'm just worried about
not looking racist, okay?
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331. Okay, I get it. Thank you.
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332. - Oh, yeah.
- Thanks. Thank you. Oh, yeah!
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333. Oh, yeah!
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334. Donny C. in the house.
Right there. Nailed it.
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335. Yeah, I think we did too.
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336. - I feel really good about it.
- Don Cheadle's the man.
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337. So good. Funny too.
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338. I didn't know his ears were pierced.
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339. I mean... Now this is racist.
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340. - What? How is that possible?
- No!
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341. Look at all of them. What do you mean?
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342. Well, it's just weird.
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343. Like, before we had a cast that was
all over the map, racially,
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344. so having a Black Kool-Aid man
didn't seem like anything,
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345. but now that they're all Black,
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346. kinda seems like what you're saying is
that Kool-Aid is only for Black people.
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347. - Fuck.
- Goddamn it, she's right.
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348. Okay, but he has to be Black because
Kool-Aid has the soul of a Black man.
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349. What?
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350. You weren't there.
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351. And his wife has got to be Black, right?
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352. I don't even wanna get
into that whole thing, okay?
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353. I don't know what to do with that.
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354. Okay, here's what we do.
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355. If we don't wanna be racist
or seem racist,
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356. we just gotta make this cast reflect
America's racial demographics,
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357. you know what I mean?
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358. That way, no one can possibly accuse us
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359. of not being representative
of America, racially,
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360. because we will mathematically
be representative of America racially.
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361. Let's do that.
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362. Okay. This is what I'm...
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363. - Okay, this is what I'm seeing.
- Okay.
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364. Seventy-five percent
of America is all white.
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365. Sixty percent white
if we exclude Hispanics.
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366. So, that would be 3.6 white people
needed for this cast.
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367. Oh, no, remember we round down
for whites, that's three.
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368. Wait, we're lumping Hispanics
in with white people now?
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369. - What the fuck is that all about?
- I...
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370. Sometimes. When they're not,
they're 25% of the population.
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371. Black people are 13%, Asians 6%,
and the rest don't matter.
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372. I mean, obvi, they matter, of course.
All lives matter.
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373. - All lives matter?
- God.
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374. All right, okay,
so according to this math,
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375. we need 0.36 an Asian person
to round this out.
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376. What the fuck is 0.36 of an Asian person—
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377. Okay, round up half an Asian, Quinn. Fuck.
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378. - Oh, my God.
- Israel is technically a part of Asia.
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379. I would just like to say that, okay?
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380. Holy fuck, Matt! No!
We are not going there.
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381. Going where? Jews are a race.
It's not my fault the Jews are a race.
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382. - All right, here we go again.
- What?
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383. It's not...
We are a race of people and a religion.
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384. It's complicated. Do we need
Jewish representation in the film?
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385. - Should we cast Josh Gad?
- No. Guys, listen, everybody focus.
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386. We just need one real half Asian. No Jews.
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387. Okay. How about a Hispanic?
How about a Hispanic person?
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388. - Yeah. Anya Taylor-Joy. She's great.
- She's fucking whiter than me.
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389. No, she's Argentinean.
She's full Argentinean.
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390. - She is?
- Oh, fuck! A white Hispanic!
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391. Two birds with one stone. Anya Taylor-Joy.
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392. - No! That's like half of a bird.
- Anya Taylor-Joy.
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393. - No stone.
- Okay.
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394. Fucking how are any of these better
than a couple of lesbians?
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395. Because gay has too many moving parts.
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396. Yeah, gay is way too complicated.
Just stick to race, okay?
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397. - Thank you.
- Make it simple.
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398. - Here we go. Gay child.
- Everybody can switch—
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399. No!
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400. Stop! Guys, stop.
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401. This is an insane conversation
for us to be having.
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402. We should not be saying any of this shit.
All right?
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403. This all started this morning
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404. 'cause we had concerns
that it was perhaps racially insensitive
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405. for Ice Cube to portray the Kool-Aid Man.
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406. There is one person who could tell us
if that's the case,
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407. and I'm gonna go talk to him.
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408. Excuse me? I'm looking
for Mr. Ice Cube? Mr. Ice? Mr. Cube?
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409. It's just Cube, man. He's in the booth.
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410. Great. Thank you. Appreciate that.
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411. Cube.
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412. - What up, Matt?
- How's it going?
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413. All good. What's happening, man?
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414. Not too much.
Am I interrupting the flow or anything?
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415. Nah, we just taking a break.
Checking out the game.
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416. Great. Cool, yeah. Sports. The best.
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417. So, what's up?
How's everything going with Kool-Aid?
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418. So well, actually. Really great.
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419. We just, we had one small concern.
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420. Concern?
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421. Concern's not even the right word.
It's more of a question.
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422. A question that I think
only you can answer.
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423. Okay. So, there's been some...
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424. discussion around the office that perhaps...
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425. Why are you whispering?
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426. No reason.
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427. There's been some discussion
around the office
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428. that perhaps the Kool-Aid Man
being portrayed
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429. by a certain person,
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430. who is a certain member
of a certain African American community...
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431. - Just say Black.
- Great, I will.
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432. Black person,
a part of the Black community...
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433. The concern is that maybe
you playing the Kool-Aid Man
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434. might be viewed as offensive
because it plays into racist tropes.
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435. Are you serious?
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436. I knew when you came in here whispering
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437. you was gonna be
on some passive-aggressive bullshit.
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438. - No, it's not passive-aggressive. I—
- You trying to fire me?
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439. No!
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440. You think a white dude could
play Kool-Aid Man better than me?
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441. Not unless you feel that way. No.
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442. Well, then why you trippin'?
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443. Is it 'cause I got first-dollar gross?
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444. Hey, Matt!
Don't be a cheap motherfucker, man.
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445. No. This has nothing to do
with the money, honestly.
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446. This is purely about the racist thing.
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447. So there's people that's concerned,
for real?
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448. That a Black man is playing Kool-Aid?
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449. It has come up as a concern, yes.
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450. Now that shit's offensive.
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451. See? Why is that offensive?
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452. The whole thing is we're trying not
to be offensive.
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453. It's offensive because
some asshole studio exec
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454. think that I'm not sophisticated enough
to understand that playing Kool-Aid
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455. could possibly be a trope
and people could see it as a stereotype.
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456. For the record, I do not think that.
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457. But yes, some stupid studio executives
have brought that up.
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458. Well, tell that motherfucker this,
all right?
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459. - The Kool-Aid Man is Black.
- Okay.
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460. - He ain't white. He ain't no Mexican.
- Right.
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461. He Black. I'm the motherfucking
Kool-Aid Man. All right?
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462. - Yes.
- And if you get anybody else to play him,
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463. now that shit's offensive.
And they're gonna be coming for your neck.
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464. That is not gonna happen 'cause
you're the motherfucking Kool-Aid Man.
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465. That's right.
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466. - Love it. We're on the same page.
- Hey.
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467. - Thank you.
- That's why you're my nigga, Matt.
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468. And you're mine. Yes.
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469. Hey. Don't come down here
with no bullshit like that anymore.
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470. - Never will again.
- All right.
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471. So glad we worked this out.
I'll see you in Anaheim.
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472. - See you in Anaheim.
- We're so psyched.
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473. - Yay, yay.
- Yay, yay.
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474. Thank you. Hello, Anaheim Comic-Con.
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475. Thank you for this warm welcome.
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476. Well, Hollywood is abuzz
with one question.
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477. Who is the star of Kool-Aid: The Movie?
Well, here with an exciting announcement
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478. is the head of Continental Studios,
Matt Remick.
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479. Thank you, Nick.
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480. Thank you, everybody.
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481. I am thrilled and honored to announce
that the Kool-Aid Man will be voiced
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482. by none other than
the incomparable Ice Cube!
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483. Oh, yeah, baby!
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484. - Thank you.
- Yeah!
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485. Oh, yay, yay!
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486. Yay, yay.
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487. And we have time to answer a
few questions from the audience,
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488. if anyone has anything they'd like to ask?
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489. I have a question.
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490. Yes. The Homelander there.
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491. I just saw on Reddit that you're using AI
to replace human animators. Is that true?
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492. Well, is it?
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493. I actually think our director,
Nick Stoller, can speak to that.
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494. Nick, why don't you come back out here?
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495. Come down, Nick.
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496. - Hey!
- Fuck you, Stoller.
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497. Fucking hack.
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498. Uh-huh. I'd rather talk about
our amazing cast.
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499. As an animator, this is pure evil.
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500. Do you have any questions
for Ice Cube you'd like to ask?
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501. You're taking jobs away from artists,
real human artists.
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502. You are everything that's wrong
with Hollywood.
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503. Yeah!
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504. - Yeah, man. She right. AI is bullshit.
- Yeah!
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505. Fuck AI! Fuck AI! Fuck AI!
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506. Fuck AI! Fuck AI! Fuck AI!
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507. Bullshit. Can't believe y'all got me
part of this bullshit.
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508. - Crushed it.
- Don't touch me, motherfucker.
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509. Thank God they didn't mention race.
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510. No shit. We dodged them bullets.
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