The Sopranos 6x17

1. When I was a child I had a fever

2. My hands felt like just two balloons

3. What are you doing up so early?

4. I couldn't sleep.

5. - You want breakfast? - Yeah, all right.

6. - Anthony. - What?

7. I am making french toast.

8. I'm not hungry. Jesus, how many times you gonna ask me?

9. You've heard the term comfort food. Maybe it'll make you feel better.

10. I know this is hard for you to believe,

11. but food may not be the answer to every problem.

12. - Neither is acting like a whiny little bitch. - Tony.

13. I'll eat at work, okay?

14. My shitty-ass pizza job.

15. If it's so horrible, take a day off.

16. My fiancee left me.

17. That job is all I have in my life.

18. It's better to have loved and lost, AJ.

19. - What? - It is.

20. I feel bad for him, but what the fuck?

21. Why's he gotta take it out on us?

22. I'm looking for a miter saw.

23. I got the Makita, carbide blade, laser guide.

24. - Lists for $600... $200. - Sold.

25. - Mike, you got that? The Makita. - Yeah.

26. Cheese it. It's the off-duty cops.

27. - You know my son-in-law Chris, the movie producer? - How you doing?

28. - Let me know about that ticket. - It's squashed, forget it.

29. Thanks. How you doing? How's my little girl?

30. - Good. You coming Sunday, right? - Yeah. 2:00, she said.

31. For you. Tell your friend Paulie to keep these power tools coming.

32. Madonn', those fucking belt sanders flying off the shelves, huh?

33. You ain't seen this many cops lined up

34. since the centennial of Dunkin' Donuts.

35. They're all handymen.

36. They got side jobs so they can afford those 18-foot bass boats.

37. Cataldo, that state trooper, he's putting a drop ceiling in my basement.

38. Thanks, sweetie.

39. 12k in there. I took my cut.

40. I'm seeing Al again next week.

41. - To business. - You're gonna jinx me? Toast with water?

42. When I was using, I was a disgrace.

43. Now I'm sober, and I'm a drip. The fuck you want from me?

44. How's about being normal? That so fucking hard?

45. Actually, yeah, Paulie, for some of us it is.

46. Don't get cunty. I'm breaking your balls.

47. What do you say we take a ride?

48. Little prime rib? On me.

49. - Maybe next time. - What are you, watching your cholesterol now, too?

50. Yeah, you're fucking hilarious.

51. Hey, Tony. What's the good word?

52. - Can't complain. - Sure you could. Phil Leotardo.

53. My first assignment out of the academy was in Brooklyn.

54. Never cared for him.

55. He tried to set up this other rookie, female, for rape and beating.

56. Listen, that subject we talked about...

57. If I was to know something

58. possibly terror-related

59. and help you out,

60. could I bank the resulting goodwill?

61. Well...

62. What happens is

63. I would personally write you what's called a 5k letter.

64. It's a document setting forth your cooperation and service.

65. Is letter would be placed in your file

66. and if you were ever convicted of a crime...

67. It'd be presented to a judge when he or she

68. would be considering sentencing guidelines.

69. Well, there were a couple of guys,

70. I don't know, arabs, arabians maybe.

71. They used to hang around the Bing,

72. and somebody I knew

73. may have did some business with them.

74. At the port?

75. - You were saying. - The point is they used to be around all the time,

76. these two, you know, drinking

77. and trying to tit-fuck the girls, whatever.

78. And then suddenly, they disappeared,

79. and I mean completely.

80. And then a week or so ago I'm driving, and I see 'em

81. with these other guys,

82. they had the headgear and the beard

83. and the whole fundamental bit.

84. But there's nothing illegal there, right?

85. What were they doing?

86. Walking.

87. But then they meet up with this other group.

88. I don't know. It seemed...

89. You got a name?

90. One was Ahmad

91. or Jamali...

92. Hold on, hold on.

93. Hey, T.

94. Yeah, I'm here with some people,

95. and, uh... The arabs from the Bing. What were their names?

96. - Some people? - Exactly.

97. Oh, fuck, yeah, Ahmed and Mohammed.

98. - What did they do? - Ahmed and Mohammed.

99. You know, actually, I got a cell number.

100. I called him recently, but he don't answer no more.

101. Ahmed Al Najafi.

102. 973-555-0146.

103. Ahmed Al Najafi.

104. Tell me they're not gonna blow up the chemical plant or some shit.

105. I don't know. I'll call you later.

106. - Cell phone. - That's a real prize.

107. Thank you.

108. So finally I said, "okay, you know,

109. as long as you don't mind yesterday's pizza.

110. "No, no", he said, "It's cool.

111. "So great," I told him. "Come back tomorrow."

112. You are so bad.

113. - Hey. - Hey, how you doing?

114. - I'll add you overtime? - Yeah, thank you.

115. - Who's that? - I don't know. Some guy.

116. What are you, going out with him?

117. He smiled, Anthony. He works here.

118. - You gotta stop. - Or what?

119. Or I won't see you again.

120. Oh, like meeting me for coffee is such a big deal.

121. Honestly, I don't even think it's a good idea anyway.

122. How come?

123. 'Cause last time you started crying and had to leave the Starbucks.

124. I can't sleep at night without you.

125. It'll get better, okay?

126. I love you so much.

127. I gotta go back to work.

128. Stop. You're embarrassing me.

129. You knock off early, we go back to your place,

130. christen those new sheets you were telling me about.

131. A man with a plan, huh?

132. The man with the erection.

133. Let me take this.

134. Hey.

135. It's me. I need you to come home. It's AJ.

136. - What happened? - I am worried, Tony.

137. I have never seen him like this.

138. I'm supposed to meet the realtor to see a new property,

139. - but I am afraid to leave him alone. - Afraid, why?

140. Will you just come home, please?

141. Go away.

142. It's me.

143. What's the matter?

144. - What happened? - You know what happened.

145. Blanca still.

146. All right, that's it. Enough's enough.

147. Look, I'm fucking depressed, okay?

148. You broke up. How long you want to cry about it?

149. She was my life.

150. You're 20 years old. You barely have a life,

151. and you're better off anyway.

152. She was cute, okay, but come on. With another guy's kid to boot.

153. She was the best thing that ever happened to me.

154. What you're going through,

155. what you're feeling right now...

156. It happens sometimes.

157. Everybody gets the blues.

158. There's a half-a-billion-dollar industry devoted to it.

159. What, Prozac?

160. No, the music business.

161. They write thousands of songs about this shit.

162. "Tears on my pillow,"

163. "Mona Lisa," right?

164. Listen, these fucking women,

165. they'll drive you nuts with your emotions and whatnot.

166. And I know it feels like you're never gonna love anybody again.

167. But trust me, there's millions of girls out there

168. that are dying to meet a guy like you.

169. - I see 'em every day. - Oh, right, I'm so special.

170. You're damn right you are. You're handsome and smart

171. and a hard worker,

172. and let's be honest... white.

173. That's a huge plus nowadays.

174. Go out and get a blowjob.

175. I don't want a blowjob.

176. Keep your voice down.

177. Why?

178. - Who's listening out there? - Nobody.

179. Oh, fuck me!

180. You saw her again, didn't you?

181. I knew it.

182. I don't wanna talk about it.

183. I love you, Anthony. It's killing me to see you like this.

184. What's the fucking point?

185. - Point of what? - Just leave me alone.

186. Honestly, I was glad when they broke up.

187. The culture divide... But now...

188. Everything turns to shit.

189. Hi.

190. - Thank you so much for inviting us. - Sure.

191. I'm so nervous cooking for all these people.

192. - Dad, do you remember Tony's sister Barbara? - Of course.

193. - Hi, nice to see you. - Her husband Tom, Stefan, Alyssa.

194. - Hi, this is for you. - Oh, thank you.

195. And the baby.

196. Oh, come in. Come in.

197. - Oh, look at that baby. - Smile for grandma.

198. - Can I play the Xbox? - What happened to folding the napkins?

199. - How you holding up? - I'm totally freaking.

200. I gotta take the ziti out.

201. You okay, T?

202. - You having a good time? - Yeah.

203. So it could be good. Got a lot of money in this.

204. Oh, look at that wrist action.

205. All those years yanking it

206. finally starting to pay off.

207. That non-alcoholic shit any good?

208. It's all right.

209. Less filling, tastes like ass.

210. This is nice.

211. About time you invited everybody over.

212. It was Kelli's idea.

213. She's been wanting to get her teeth wet with the entertaining.

214. Good thing, else I'd never see you.

215. What are you talking about?

216. - Steak's done. - You think so?

217. It keeps cooking even if it's off the flame.

218. The juices.

219. So what's up with you?

220. You've been like a ghost lately.

221. You're around one second, next thing you're gone.

222. - I was by the Bing the other day. - For, like, five minutes.

223. You know, you of all people should understand how hard it is

224. for me to be around that place.

225. - I should? Why? - 'Cause you're in therapy.

226. You understand the human condition, at least.

227. Still doing that?

228. Turn those ribs.

229. Truth is, between the booze and the strippers over there,

230. half of them are fucking cokeheads.

231. It's hard, you know?

232. And Satriale's, that fridge full of beer.

233. You know how tough it is to eat a sausage and peppers

234. without a cold one?

235. So then just quit. You want a beer, too bad.

236. - Show some balls. - I got balls.

237. I can't eat eggplant no more 'cause of my stomach.

238. Might put me into a relapse.

239. Now believe me, I'd like to, but I don't.

240. It's not that simple.

241. - Well, make it simple. - It's a disease.

242. I inherited it. You know the problem with my mother.

243. I gotta be honest. This whole disease concept,

244. I think it's bullshit.

245. So you know more than the leading scientists now?

246. - I know a crutch when I see it. - So my dad?

247. You obviously must have knew he had a crutch.

248. - What the fuck are you talking about? - Come on, Ton', huh?

249. Between the coke, the vodka,

250. whatever the fuck else he was squirting up his arm...

251. Let's be honest about the great Dickie Moltisanti:

252. my dad, your hero,

253. wasn't much more than a fucking junkie.

254. - Hey, don't fucking move! - Whoa, whoa, Al, whoa, whoa.

255. - Easy easy. - What the fuck is going on?

256. Paulie, remember? Germani.

257. We met at your granddaughter's christening.

258. The fuck are you doing?

259. - My uncle didn't call you? - No...

260. - Who's your uncle? - Paulie Gaultieri.

261. - These are for his friend down at the union. - What union?

262. He was supposed to call you. You fucking believe this?

263. Al, this is a big fucking mix-up.

264. I thought Paulie called you.

265. - The guy's waiting. - So you break in?

266. I got a silent alarm that goes right to my house.

267. He'll take care of you. Don't worry.

268. Let me talk to my son-in-law.

269. Chris? Fine by me,

270. but if I were you, I wouldn't make a problem where there ain't one.

271. - Take over, okay, Felix? - What you do?

272. - I'm leaving. - Who?

273. I'm going home, all right? I quit.

274. Why you do that?

275. If Dale calls, just tell him I'm sorry.

276. But you're the manager.

277. - Ton', hey. - Hey.

278. - How you doing? - This always helps.

279. Ooh! God bless the NFL.

280. I tell ya, I owe a spot of it to my son.

281. I was against this kid even going to college.

282. But once him and Carlo's kid started taking action on campus,

283. far as I'm concerned, he should stay till he gets a Phd.

284. Benefits of a higher education.

285. Don't get me wrong. He's learning stuff, too.

286. The shit this kid knows about computers...

287. He set his mother up with a whole web site

288. for her ceramics business.

289. You must be very proud.

290. Believe me, I thank God every day.

291. I gotta take a leak.

292. Oh, Parisi the younger. I was just talking to your dad about you.

293. - What did I do now? - To hear him tell it, u're the golden boy.

294. - Hey, ton'. - What the fuck's with you?

295. Root canal. They got me on Oxycodone.

296. My whole fucking head is numb.

297. Well, that answers a loof questions.

298. What the fuck are you laughing at?

299. I'll see you inside, Ton'. I got something for you.

300. - So how's Rutgers? - You see those envelopes?

301. Majoring in cash, Minoring in ass.

302. Things change, uh?

303. When I was in college, it wasn't so much with the sports betting.

304. - Hey, how's AJ doing? - Good good.

305. He's working. Broke up with that girlfriend of his.

306. That spanish chick? He took her to my cousin Angela's wedding.

307. She was smoking, that girl.

308. Yeah yeah, you know, whatever.

309. He didn't want to get too serious.

310. Fuck, Jay, check it out.

311. Holy shit.

312. So Sil tells me

313. you booked a party here next week.

314. - Yeah, yeah, it's our frat. - You should call AJ.

315. He's probably busy, but I know he'd love to see you guys.

316. - Yeah, sure, absolutely. - Definitely, absolutely.

317. - Who is it? - Me.

318. - How you doing, kid? - What the fuck, Paulie?

319. I left you four messages.

320. My flight was delayed. I just got home.

321. And I've been dealing with Al for two days.

322. Just tell him to relax.

323. They busted into his store. His acid reflux is acting up.

324. He woke up Kelli, got her all upset.

325. It's my fault your father-in-law's a crybaby?

326. They told him I'd take care of him.

327. - What's his problem? - I'm stupid now?

328. You know and I know they were there to boost that shit.

329. It couldn't wait, okay? I pormised a load

330. to lenny down the joint-fitters union.

331. What do I give a fuck? It ain't my union.

332. Lower your voice. I got neighbors.

333. Fuck your neighbors. When you gonna pay me?

334. When you suck the money out of my ass! Now get the fuck out!

335. Add three more M.R.I.s and you're looking at a 10% increase

336. - Across the board. - Listen, I gotta talk to you.

337. - Now? - It can't wait, T. This fucking paulie!

338. What happened?

339. He sent his idiot nephew and jason molinaro to my father-in-law's store.

340. They boosted a pallet of power saws.

341. - They did? - Yeah.

342. Not exactly. Al caught 'em while they were there.

343. So they did or they did not take the saws?

344. They did under false pretense.

345. And this is what you couldn't wait to talk to me about?

346. They broke into the guy's store, T!

347. Yeah, I hear you. I get it.

348. But we're in the middle of talking about an ongoing,

349. potentially multimillion - dollar proposition here, Christopher.

350. It ain't the money, Ton'.

351. Oh, really? Well, I'm glad you feel that way.

352. A pallet of drills. You believe this shit?

353. Go have a lime rickey or whatever the fuck it is you're drinking these days,

354. and we'll be done in a few minutes.

355. Forget it, all right? I got other shit to do.

356. Come in.

357. I need to talk to you guys.

358. What's the matter? Finn?

359. What? No.

360. It's not about me. AJ.

361. - What about him? - I know he's upset,

362. but he's been saying some things that are really disturbing.

363. - Like what? - Like nobody gives a shit about him.

364. What's the point of anything? Stuff like that.

365. I told you about that girl hadley in my dorm sophomore year,

366. the one who threw herself off the library balcony.

367. These are the exact kind of things she was saying.

368. I don't mean to get you all upset...

369. Of course not. I'm glad you said something.

370. Good night.

371. - Good night, sweetie. - Get some sleep.

372. I'm just a guy looking to punch you in the mouth.

373. Oh, you can take a punch.

374. I guess we knew that already, didn't we?

375. You can actually land a punch, too.

376. - You're pretty good... - Thanks.

377. against a 36-year-old out-of-shape lieutenant.

378. I came here today to tell you

379. in all seriousness that I'm done.

380. I did what you said.

381. I gave it a lot of thought,

382. and I decided that once and for all,

383. it's over.

384. The truth is

385. this therapy is a jerk-off.

386. You know it, and I know it.

387. I actually don't know it,

388. but please continue.

389. - It's a jerk-off. - Yes, you've said that.

390. Anyway, I was coming here to quit.

391. Had it all planned out. But guess what.

392. My son is talking suicide.

393. So now I'm trapped here forever.

394. My god, what did he say?

395. His girlfriend, fiancee, whatever...

396. She broke up with him.

397. He's beyond devastated.

398. Would you like me to recommend someone for him to talk to?

399. Carmela's getting a referral from his own pediatrician.

400. Oh.

401. After that incompetent you sent Meadow to?

402. So I suppose now comes the inherent fucking grilling

403. - about how I feel about all this. - Isn't that why you're here?

404. Friends of mine, they got sons his age,

405. and they're happy,

406. ambitious.

407. They fucking take life as it comes.

408. I know it seems that way,

409. but do you really know these other boys?

410. I know what I see, my son curled up on the couch

411. in a fetus position when he should be out banging coeds.

412. - Have you talked to him? - Till I'm blue in the face.

413. We both have, and now we're afraid to talk to him

414. because of what he might do.

415. Obviously, I'm prone to depression...

416. A certain bleak attitude

417. about the world,

418. but I know I can handle it.

419. Your kids, though...

420. It's like when they're little,

421. and they get sick,

422. you'd give anything in the world to trade places with them,

423. so they don't have to suffer.

424. And then to think you're the cause of it.

425. How are you the cause of it?

426. It's in his blood, this miserable fucking existence.

427. My rotten fucking putrid genes

428. have infected kid's soul.

429. That's my gift to my son.

430. I know this is difficult.

431. But I'm very glad we're having this discussion.

432. Really, really?

433. 'Cause I gotta be honest. I think it fucking sucks.

434. - What does? - Therapy, this.

435. I hate this fucking shit!

436. Seriously, we're both adults here, right?

437. So after all is said

438. and done,

439. after all the complaining and the crying

440. and all the fucking bullshit,

441. is this all there is?

442. Yes, welcome.

443. Hi, I'm Chris. I'm an alcoholic and drug addict.

444. Hi, chris.

445. I want to go back to what Stan said...

446. How not being able to socialize

447. is hard when you're a salesman.

448. In my case, it's the same thing.

449. It's actually taking food out of my daughter mouth.

450. My boss, for all his bullshit encouragement,

451. how he respects what I'm doing,

452. the reality is he resents my sobriety.

453. I had the same thing at Unicor.

454. They were all on board for the intervention,

455. but skip one golf outing, and you're ostracized.

456. He's an enabler, too, this guy, the worst fucking kind.

457. Pours you a drink with one hand,

458. judges you with the other if you take it.

459. And he wonders why I'm distant... At least he says he does...

460. Why I wanna branch out into other things.

461. But I can promise you I'd have more money in my pocket,

462. plus more responsibility if I sat with him drinking,

463. watching that scotch drool out

464. of his fat fucking mouth.

465. embedded that dream into our culture...

466. Hey.

467. What are you watching?

468. Nothing.

469. Oh, whoa, that's a good one.

470. John Wayne.

471. Two Jasons call you?

472. Invite you to a party tomorrow night?

473. I don't know.

474. Well, either they did or they didn't.

475. Yeah, I guess. Jason Gervasi called.

476. What'd you tell him?

477. I didn't call him back.

478. How come?

479. 'Cause I don't want to go.

480. Of course not. Beer, strippers,

481. fuckin' around with guys your own age...

482. You hate all that shit.

483. You gonna call him?

484. Said I don't want to go.

485. I know you don't want to go.

486. You don't want to work, you don't want to eat,

487. you don't want to talk either.

488. So, all that being the case,

489. you're gonna shower tomorrow night, you're gonna shave,

490. you're gonna get dress, you're gonna go to that party.

491. I'm not gonna debate you on this.

492. Fine.

493. just how soon before they attempt to blow this fire out?

494. They won't try to kill it till they're ready to cap the well.

495. - Your boss is your uncle. - Once removed.

496. That's gotta add to the source.

497. We used to be so tight.

498. And producing movies is high-stress enough.

499. I have a happy marriage.

500. But there was a woman...

501. She worked with us in a club we had.

502. Anyway, she became a problem to deal with,

503. and...

504. I sided with him.

505. She was out of my life.

506. Okay, fine.

507. But he never appreciated it.

508. Give give give, it's all I ever do.

509. I think that's when the relationship between me and him got poisoned.

510. How's it going?

511. Al here?

512. You just missed him. He went to lunch.

513. - Eh. - Can I help you fellas?

514. We're here for the drills.

515. What drills?

516. You know, in the back.

517. I know what you mean, but Al didn't say nothing about picking anything up.

518. This fuckin' guy.

519. Get him on the phone.

520. All right.

521. What's your name?

522. Me? I'm Mike.

523. Paulie.

524. Nice to meet.

525. Voice mail.

526. Gimme that.

527. Yeah, Al, it's paulie.

528. Listen, we're here with mike.

529. We're gonna take the drills. I'll call you later about that other order.

530. Huh?

531. What's her name?

532. Blanca.

533. Had you and Blanca been engaged long?

534. Only a couple of weeks.

535. She had a son too,

536. from when she used to be married.

537. What do you think went wrong?

538. Her husband was an asshole, supposedly.

539. With your relationship?

540. Oh.

541. I don't know.

542. I mean, I wish there was a reason, but...

543. She says there isn't.

544. I think maybe it's because we have way more money

545. in my family than hers.

546. They're immigrants,

547. and that might have scared her.

548. Have you been feeling suicidal, Anthony?

549. A little bit.

550. Have you ever tried to kill yourself?

551. No.

552. I mean, once, me and my friends

553. jumped off my garage roof,

554. but you know, that was just to fool around.

555. You sleeping a lot?

556. I'm tired,

557. but I keep waking up.

558. Nightmares?

559. I just keep thinking about her.

560. I mean, it hurts, but...

561. I can't help it.

562. Does anything in life give you pleasure lately?

563. I don't know.

564. Not really.

565. There's a medication called Lexapro.

566. It's an antidepressant.

567. I have friends who take that.

568. Well, I'm going to write you a prescription.

569. I'm making mad fuckin' money, bro.

570. I gotta shut my phone off sometimes.

571. You should totally do it, man.

572. I'm not really good with betting and percentages.

573. I got like a 450 on my math SAT.

574. Fuck that shit, bro. I could hook you up in like 10 minutes.

575. Can I dance for you, baby?

576. I guess.

577. Yeah, dude! Yeah!

578. Yeah!

579. Look at this pile of shit.

580. Yeah, so get some toilet paper.

581. What is that, comedy?

582. Actually, yeah.

583. Come on, what are you gonna do?

584. Fuck it, I'm all in.

585. Fuckin' idiot. Toilet paper?

586. Fuckin' cunt!

587. - Fuck! - Ho, chris!

588. You were my friend.

589. Whoa! No!

590. Oh, fuck!

591. Call an ambulance!

592. Tony, wake up. I need to talk to you.

593. What?

594. You let our underage son go to a party at a strip club?

595. What time is it?

596. Take it easy, will you? What's the big deal?

597. He just got in three hours ago.

598. He is still drunk and he's not even drinking age!

599. Yet he could die in iraq.

600. What does that ha to do with anything?

601. Jesus Christ, Carm, he's gonna be 21 in two months.

602. He's an emotional wreck, tony.

603. So, seeing a pair of tits is gonna send him over the edge?

604. Got him out of the house, around people his own age.

605. At the fuckin' Bing?

606. Well, they're college kids. It's what they do.

607. I know you'd rather see him in his room drinkin' cocoa,

608. but this is the way back,

609. believe me... And the way back to college...

610. Fraternities, frat boys.

611. Hey.

612. I did a stupid thing, Ton'. I won't deny it.

613. Stupid? Just hung up with Paulie.

614. His nephew's got six broken vertebraes.

615. I know that, and I'm sorry.

616. But this is the second fuckin' time

617. Paulie flouted his authority to my face.

618. This shit with the tools... I know he set up the deal with the cubans,

619. but this is my father-in-law we're talkin' about, tony, my family.

620. In any case, this bullshit could have been handled with a conversation.

621. I came to the Bing, remember? I tried to talk to you about it.

622. And I told you to wait, and you left to go God-knows-where.

623. I got to be honest, Christopher,

624. I can't help thinkin' that this goes directly to what we talked about...

625. More than once.

626. If you were around more, you had your finger on the pulse,

627. problems like this would be squashed in the womb.

628. Whether I'm around's got nothing to do with it.

629. He needed the tools, he could have left me a message.

630. We're supposed to leave phone messages

631. about interstate hijacking now?

632. How about faxes? Emails?

633. Make it even easier for the cops.

634. This is a face-to-face business, Christopher.

635. And yeah, I'm gonna talk to paulie, 'cause believe me,

636. there's a few things that he needs to hear.

637. But in the meantime, you figure out how much he owes for the tools,

638. and we're gonna deduct that against what you're gonna owe

639. for little Paulie's hospital bills.

640. - Yeah? - He tore up my lawn, Ton'!

641. Drove his fuckin' car right up on the grass.

642. - Who did? - Fuckin' Paulie, who else?

643. 40 grand in landscaping.

644. Terrorized my wife and daughter.

645. Destroyed the bushes, the grass,

646. and every fuckin' flower she plant

647. - Just relax, okay? - I am fuckin' relaxed.

648. I'm not gonna do nothin'.

649. Because I love you, because I'm committed to my work,

650. I ain't gonna do shit.

651. I'm gonna sit tight and hold my tongue,

652. and not cause no problems for you.

653. No, bad was '99. Mets/Braves national league championship.

654. My dad went apeshit, man.

655. He threw a fuckin' vase right through the tv.

656. Ho, Victor. What are you doing at a deek party, bro?

657. You settlin' up?

658. Come on, it's friday. Bills are sunday.

659. What are we, fuckin' Citibank? How long we gonna carry your ass?

660. Buffalo's a lock.

661. Give me a dime at two and a half.

662. If not, my father's sending my check this week anyway.

663. Fuck that. If not... You see this guy right here?

664. Tony Soprano Jr.

665. Know what that means, right?

666. Monday, bro. One way or the other.

667. Don't be a dick about it.

668. Is he still sleeping?

669. He's not home.

670. He stayed with his friends.

671. He sounded good. They were playing cards.

672. Well, it's been a week almost, on the meds.

673. All I know, is it's a pleasure not to have him laying around here

674. like a miserab'.

675. It's companies like Wal-Mart we got to thank.

676. They're always fighting against tightenin' imports.

677. So, our provolone, our perfume,

678. whooop! slides right under the fuckin' door.

679. All those inspections slow down wal-mart's operation.

680. And what about terrorism... Missiles and shit?

681. There he is... The missing link.

682. Hey.

683. How you doin'?

684. Good.

685. I called Sal Vitro like you said.

686. He's coming by this week, resod the lawn.

687. And I talked to paulie. We worked out a payment schedule.

688. He's here?

689. Yeah.

690. All right.

691. Let me say hello.

692. Hey.

693. How you doing, kid?

694. How's little Paulie?

695. He's fucked up.

696. He got your flowers, though.

697. Good.

698. - Listen, Paulie... - Forget it, okay?

699. Shit happens. What are you gonna do?

700. There's no point in ruminatin'.

701. You're right.

702. I just wanted to say I'm sorry.

703. Me too.

704. Do this again, sweetie. And get him a club soda.

705. You know what? Fuck it.

706. Whatever he's having.

707. Good times.

708. Salut.

709. - That's fuckin' rocket fuel. - One more, one more.

710. - One more. - Ah yeah...

711. - What's going on, baby? - Are you nuts?

712. When, now? Who else is there?

713. Let's do it.

714. Deek!

715. Deek deek deek deek!

716. All right, yeah... No, definitely.

717. In like 20 minutes.

718. - Yeah! - All right, bye.

719. Yo, Donna Amato, they're having a party and guess who's over there?

720. - Victor. - That welchin' little prick,

721. you fuckin' kidding me?

722. You wanna come?

723. Oh I don't know. I'm just gonna hang here.

724. Oh come on! It'll be fun!

725. 11 more credits and I can transfer to Syracuse.

726. Their business program is awesome.

727. Hey, you made it.

728. Fuck.

729. Vic, where are you goin', buddy?

730. I was just grabbing a beer. What's up?

731. Listen, I'm getting your money, okay?

732. - No, yeah. - Cool, great.

733. Let's take a ride and talk about it, all right?

734. Come on, guys, stop.

735. What's going on?

736. Nothin', we're just fuckin' around.

737. - Get in the fuckin' car! - No!

738. Get in the fuckin' car!

739. Fuckin' deadbeat.

740. You know what happens when you don't fuckin' pay?

741. Stop stop!

742. What, are you gonna cry?

743. What are we, fuckin' assholes?

744. Come on, man. Where's the shit?

745. Yo, help us hold him down, come on.

746. - Come on! - Get off me!

747. - No! - Quit kickin', bitch!

748. Get his shoes.

749. Hey, dude, you ever take chemistry?

750. 'Cause Dr. Parisi and me, we're gonna do a little experiment.

751. We want to see what happens when you mix sulfuric acid with toe jam.

752. Fuck no! No! No!

753. Don't, don't, don't do it, fuck!

754. That hurt?

755. - You little bitch. - No!

756. I mean, you have a kid,

757. and they look at you...

758. You look back.

759. And you're looking at yourself, really.

760. Or part of you, plus another person...

761. That love.

762. I look at her eyes, man,

763. and she looks up,

764. back at me...

765. How the fuck do I put myself up for adoption?

766. - What? - Nothing, go ahead.

767. - She ain't adopted, Paulie. - I'm kidding.

768. What were you saying?

769. My point... What the fuck was...

770. Is babies. They're the future.

771. Do you realize by the time Caitlin's out of college,

772. it'll be like, the year 2027 or something?

773. She takes after you, she won't be out of fourth grade by then.

774. Look, by that time, she'll be working here, so who gives a shit?

775. - Ho, what are you doing? - Nothin'.

776. - Oh! - Come on, come on.

777. - We're just fuckin' around. - It's late.

778. I gotta go.

779. - Hello? - It's me.

780. I'm fuckin' losing it, man.

781. Chris, it's 11-fuckin'-30.

782. Well, you're awake, though, right?

783. I'm sorry. You sleepin'?

784. I'm working. I'm on a deadline for a "Law & Order."

785. Marianne's left me alone.

786. How much did you drink?

787. I don't know. A lot.

788. I'm gonna make some coffee, and then we're gonna call your sponsor.

789. He's gone. Eddie, he's away someplace...

790. Philadelphia.

791. This fuckin' Paulie, man.

792. You think he's your friend, this cocksucker,

793. all these pricks...

794. What are you doing?

795. You're drunk. I'm making coffee.

796. I don't want fuckin' coffee.

797. It's an urban myth, anyway.

798. - What do you write? - "Law & Order."

799. I'll give you stories make your fuckin' head curl...

800. The shit I seen.

801. Fuck that, the shit I did personally.

802. I don't want to hear it.

803. What you need to do is sober up and get to a meeting.

804. That's your fuckin' answer?

805. It is the answer. Work the program.

806. You know, you're a fuckin' robot.

807. Anybody ever tell you that?

808. You got any fuckin' emotion in there?

809. I don't know about you,

810. but my friends have abandoned me.

811. I've been totally fuckin' ostrafied.

812. Because when we drink and we use,

813. we are not pleasant to be around.

814. My heart's fuckin' breaking and you're blowing me off?

815. You know, my father fuckin' abandoned me.

816. I thought he was shot.

817. You have any idea, if I wanted,

818. what I could do to these pricks?

819. One phone call and it's over.

820. The whole fuckin' castle comes down...

821. Whoa whoa whoa!

822. Do you remember my girlfriend, Adriana...

823. My fiancee?

824. My friend, ralph cifaretto?

825. - I know shit, my friend. - Chris, come on!

826. Serious fuckin' things,

827. that would have major implications

828. on a lot of fuckin' people...

829. Chris, I shouldn't hear this shit.

830. I know, right. You said.

831. You just want to write about it, leech off me.

832. I'm trying to help you, man.

833. That fuckin' program...

834. The government has got money to burn.

835. Gravano was livin' large down in arizona,

836. all on that federal tit.

837. - All right, let's get you home. - I like the sun,

838. be closer to hollywood anyway.

839. Give me your phone. I'm calling your wife.

840. - What? - I have told you

841. repeatedly, I do not want to hear this shit.

842. I let you be part of my movie.

843. You let me?

844. I'm pouring my heart out, man.

845. And I'm very sorry.

846. - But we met in AA. - Chris!

847. You're in the mafia.

848. Fine.

849. - Hey. - Hey.

850. Early night, huh?

851. they're slouching up 57th street,

852. so next time we're in the city, I want to go.

853. What's this? Party time?

854. Rachael Ray was on "Leno." We got hungry.

855. Sit down, I'll get some plates.

856. Where were you guys?

857. - Frat party. - Had a meeting.

858. Did you go out tonight?

859. I met a friend for coffee.

860. That's probably why you're still awake.

861. I guess so.

862. Miss Meadow had a mystery date

863. - she refuses to discuss. - oh yeah?

864. What are you doing? Sit down.

865. I'm wired. I don't know.

866. So what's the mystery?

867. That you had a date begin with?

868. Bite me, okay?