The Sopranos 3x7

1. I want you to count backwards from 10.

2. 10, nine...

3. Mr. Soprano,

4. there's someone here to see you.

5. Even here you hector me?

6. The director has authorized us to make you an offer.

7. Give up your nephew Tony, cooperate fully,

8. help take him down.

9. What do I get?

10. A guaranteed cure.

11. No more cancer?

12. Not a single diseased cell.

13. I'm happy for you.

14. I know you've waited a long time...

15. stay home, clip your coupons, be a happy man.

16. Don't let certain people take advantage...

17. I'm kiddin' you, you old fuck.

18. Peppers and eggs.

19. Dr. Kennedy...

20. it's Dr. Enloe...

21. I have the results of the frozen section.

22. Can we move this along, Dr. Enloe?

23. I have a thyroid in O.R. Six at 10:30.

24. Based on the preliminary results of the frozen section

25. and depending, of course, on the full path report—

26. is it clean, Enloe, or not?

27. Yes, it's clean.

28. Miles, you close.

29. Let's do it quickly, I've got his BP back up,

30. but I don't know how long it'll hold.

31. Watch and learn, Miles.

32. Watch and learn.

33. Well?

34. Your uncle is a very strong man, Mr. Soprano.

35. He did very well.

36. The news is all good.

37. Beautiful.

38. So, the cancer is...

39. gone? You bet.

40. I took a tumor the size of a fist out of his stomach.

41. Madonn'.

42. Cheryl, make sure that Marty gets

43. doc? That Goldman-Sachs statement.

44. Yes?

45. I...

46. just want to say thanks.

47. You know, my uncle thinks the world of you.

48. If there's ever anything I can do, a favor, anything,

49. let me know.

50. I'll keep that in mind, Mr. Soprano.

51. Game three.

52. That's $60.

53. Good luck getting it.

54. I fuckin' won, Paulie, it's only right you pay me.

55. And for other things too.

56. Like what?

57. Fuckin' Dom Perignon for everybody in the skybox

58. at the garden the other night.

59. Check comes, suddenly you're M.I.A.

60. Chrissy, you're too fucking worried about what I give you.

61. Worry a little more about what you give me.

62. Blow me with your lectures, Paulie.

63. Kid, you wearing a wire?

64. Are you fucking crazy?

65. Pasqual, pat him down.

66. He fuckin' touches me...

67. then make it easy on all us all.

68. Take 'em off... everything.

69. New york reopened the books, but they also laid it down.

70. Probationary period.

71. When I was coming up this would never happen to new made guys.

72. But too many people are doin' a simulcast.

73. Maybe you, you fuck.

74. Do me a favor and don't take it personally.

75. I said everything.

76. Go fuck yourself.

77. Before I was breaking balls,

78. now, you're beginning to worry me.

79. I guess you could call that a dick.

80. You're going, young man, that's all there is to it.

81. Jason Mangelli isn't going.

82. Tony, you wanna weigh in here?

83. Tony?

84. What?

85. The Washington trip?

86. No, you're gonna be on that school bus to D.C. tomorrow.

87. You're all packed and paid for and you're gonna pay attention

88. and you're gonna learn something for a change.

89. We're going to FBI headquarters.

90. So?

91. Excuse me.

92. What did you do to this 'scarrole?

93. It's delicious.

94. Balsamic.

95. That's all they have at King's these days.

96. Balsamic, balsamic, balsamic.

97. My mother never heard of balsamic.

98. I gotta go.

99. Problems at work.

100. It's Sunday dinner, Tony.

101. I know.

102. I gotta go.

103. Alright, Hugh, see you later.

104. Can I be excused too?

105. No, you may not.

106. He's got homework to finish before the trip.

107. Go ahead, Anthony.

108. It's a nice example he sets for his son.

109. Ma...

110. the man's got two speeds...

111. moping or yelling...

112. when he's here.

113. He's got an uncle sick with cancer.

114. Oh, please.

115. They didn't speak for a year.

116. Actually, if you must know, Tony has been a little better.

117. We've been seeing his therapist together.

118. What?

119. He's no Angelo Stamfa, that's all.

120. What is that supposed to mean?

121. You know Angelo was dying to marry you

122. and now, Stamfa's is a chain of drugstores.

123. So, what, he doesn't need therapy?

124. He prescribes his own tranquilizers?

125. Don't be so sensitive.

126. What sensitive?

127. I gotta hear this Angelo Stamfa shit again?

128. All I was saying was—

129. I know what you were saying.

130. Hugh, bring your plate!

131. You are blowing this all out of proportion.

132. We worry about you, that's all.

133. Spare me your concern, alright?

134. And spare me your attitude too.

135. Or maybe you forgot,

136. dad's little strip mall on route 17 was zoned residential

137. until Tony made a phone call.

138. Bullshit.

139. Oh, really, dad?

140. The contract you got to do at Sparta High for the hurricanes repairs.

141. What, all the other builders were too busy to bid?

142. Oh, please, my heart bleeds.

143. What, the waters don't part for you wherever you go?

144. I earn it.

145. You two get a free pass.

146. Hey.

147. Ton', what's up?

148. Hey, Tony.

149. Anyway, four dollars a pound.

150. Who brought this in here?

151. Georgie.

152. It's wacky, huh?

153. What do you think, it's a fuckin' playroom back there?

154. What, Ton'?

155. What, what, fuckin' toys? This is a place of business.

156. That's an office back there!

157. I saw it at Rite-Aid, they were selling 'em.

158. What? What did you say?

159. Ah!

160. I pay you a fuckin' salary!

161. Carmela...

162. you sounded tense on the phone.

163. Ah...

164. I just wanted to make sure it was okay if I came alone.

165. I mean, because Tony couldn't make it.

166. I love the artwork you have out there,

167. those country scenes.

168. Thank you.

169. That statue is not my favorite.

170. Oh, come on...

171. look, it's not like this when me and Tony are here together.

172. You never give him the silent treatment.

173. Is that what you think?

174. I'm giving you the silent treatment?

175. Maybe you could tell me why you came today.

176. I'm worried about my husband.

177. The mood swings.

178. I thought...

179. when his mother died, maybe...

180. but still half the time he doesn't even talk to me.

181. You've seen him get like that,

182. that day he sat here like a wall.

183. I know that he's your patient

184. and I am only the patient's wife,

185. but you try living with that 24 hours a day, seven days a week,

186. see how you feel.

187. I see.

188. Oh, you do?

189. Well, for your information, I am not the only one.

190. The fact is, Tony isn't under the weather today,

191. he just didn't feel like coming.

192. "Fuck that shit", I think he said, okay?

193. Usually happens when we touch on a nerve.

194. He was distressed about this young man's death

195. in the garbage compactor.

196. See, he didn't say, "garbage compactor", did he?

197. See?

198. What is it you believe?

199. You know about his job.

200. He reports to a strip club.

201. Who knows how he spends his days?

202. I'm sorry.

203. I'm just frustrated, that's all.

204. Tony's been out of sorts, for so long

205. and there is...

206. there is nothing I can do to help him.

207. I think coming to therapy with him

208. has stirred up a lot of feelings in you

209. that you would like to address with somebody.

210. Oh, please.

211. I'm just a little emotional today.

212. I would like to help you,

213. but as you've pointed out, your husband is my patient.

214. I'm not the one who needs mental help.

215. I just needed to vent.

216. In case you change your mind,

217. here's the number of a colleague in Livingston.

218. He was a teacher of mine.

219. That really won't be necessary,

220. but thank you anyway.

221. Thank you for your time.

222. You took these yourself?

223. That's a Samoan village I lived in for a month.

224. You could send these into "National Geographic."

225. So, I got back your complete surgical pathology

226. and op reports.

227. I feel 100%.

228. That's good.

229. It's possible though...

230. that there may be some malignant cells we didn't get.

231. See, when we operate,

232. we have to decide how much healthy tissue

233. to cut around the tumor.

234. Alright?

235. The margins weren't wide enough.

236. We took a small sampling of the tumor from the frozen section,

237. when we got back the complete results,

238. it showed nodal involvement.

239. Don't blame yourself, doc.

240. So, what do we do next?

241. It's called amended surgery.

242. Oh, Jesus.

243. Cut me again?

244. Mrs. Brody is here.

245. Don't let me keep you, doc.

246. I am kinda backed up.

247. Let's schedule you for Tuesday at six A.M.

248. We can admit and prep you Monday night.

249. Any questions?

250. When can he eat regular food again?

251. I'd guess two weeks.

252. Let's fill out the surgical consent forms.

253. That's one less thing you have to deal with in the hospital.

254. Take all the time you need to read them.

255. No need, you say sign, I sign.

256. You tell me to take a crap on the deck of the Queen Mary,

257. an hour later, they're hosin' her down with disinfectant.

258. I owe you everything, doc.

259. How do I know what nodal involvement means?

260. Didn't you fuckin' listen?

261. A whole issue of "U.S. News" on seniors and health.

262. Bring somebody with you to the doctor's, it said.

263. Somebody to ask questions.

264. You ask one dumb fuckin' question about my diet.

265. Angie?

266. Carmela!

267. Hi. Hi.

268. What a surprise.

269. I didn't know you shopped over here.

270. They're running a special on Iams.

271. Every penny counts these days.

272. How are you doing, Angie, with Pussy gone?

273. Oh, you know.

274. I'll tell you, shopping for one is no picnic.

275. Why don't you come for dinner?

276. It's just me and Tony,

277. with med at school, A.J. 's on a field trip.

278. Who knows, maybe we'll get lucky and Tony won't show.

279. That's Coco's worst time of the day.

280. I can't leave her.

281. Angie, that dog is not a substitute

282. for human contact.

283. That french poodle is all I got left of Sal.

284. 24 years, he disappears one day, and I get left with a sick dog.

285. The vet says I should put her down,

286. but I want her to get another operation.

287. I remember when Sal was around

288. there was nothing too good for that dog.

289. Yeah, but where am I gonna come up with $1200?

290. I mean, Tony helps out and I am so grateful.

291. It covers the basics,

292. but anything extra, there's no way, Carmela.

293. Jeez, Ang, I'm sorry.

294. That must be so tough.

295. I told the wallpaper guy that this was okay.

296. Well, why did you do that?

297. Because I didn't want to deal with your parents anymore.

298. Anybody around here love the word "Jimmy Choo shoes"?

299. No way!

300. Oh, my God.

301. They're gorgeous!

302. Or would the lady prefer something in...

303. gold?

304. Say a nice...

305. I don't know, whatever the fuck that is.

306. They're all yours, baby.

307. And they're from next seas you can't even buy them yet.

308. What size are these?

309. 10.

310. 10?

311. That's sasquatch size, Christopher.

312. I'm an 8.5.

313. Fuck, fuck, fuck...

314. where'd I get 10 from?

315. Yeah, where?

316. So, now what happens?

317. You gotta give 'em all back?

318. Temporarily.

319. I'll get you 8.5's tomorrow.

320. All of 'em?

321. You swear?

322. More even.

323. Since you been, you know...

324. "in",

325. I just can't believe the stuff we get.

326. It's so great.

327. Except for that schmaccone Paulie.

328. Fuck him and the coupe de ville he rode in on.

329. He saying you're holding back again?

330. Like I'm gonna give that prick a full share?

331. C'mere.

332. What do you say?

333. I love you, baby.

334. Oh, you fucking better.

335. You better.

336. I do.

337. You could've called.

338. Now everything's cold.

339. That's why they invented microwaves,

340. for inconsiderate husbands.

341. It's just that since we're alone,

342. it would be nice to have dinner together.

343. Don't bust my chops, Carmela.

344. I got a lot on my mind.

345. This is fuckin' delicious.

346. Really.

347. Is this the pecorino?

348. Right.

349. The hell with heatin' it up, it's good like this.

350. I'm glad something brings you joy.

351. You're amazing, your cookin'.

352. I'm having lunch with our daughter's dean tomorrow.

353. I gather you won't be joining me.

354. I told you, all he wants is our money.

355. Fine.

356. We already shell out 40 grand a year to those people.

357. It's well spent.

358. She's really learning, she's out on her own.

359. And if she passes us by—

360. if?

361. She did that when she was 14.

362. Isn't that what you want for your kids?

363. No.

364. I want them to be backwards and ignorant

365. and sit around with their thumb up their ass

366. and I'm gonna make sure of that by not going to lunch

367. with some asshole who's trying to shake me down.

368. Fine, Tony, don't go.

369. Guess who I ran into at the supermarket today.

370. Angie Bonpensiero.

371. Really?

372. How's she doing?

373. Her dog is sick.

374. What, that fluffy french coco piece of shit?

375. What's wrong with him?

376. Her, osteoporosis.

377. Angie needs money for an operation.

378. Well, take it up with Pussy.

379. If you can find the fat fuck, wherever the feds put him.

380. I'd look in Arizona, you know, stake out all the "TGI Fridays."

381. He loves their wings.

382. He left Angie holding the bag, which is not right.

383. And those FBI family value loving cocksuckers,

384. how could they let him go without his wife?

385. Into the program?

386. Yeah, that's right.

387. He ratted us out, Carm.

388. Me and you.

389. And that's where he is

390. and I don't want to hear about him ever again.

391. Or his ungrateful cunt wife.

392. His what wife?

393. Okay...

394. who was your oldest?

395. Easy.

396. Chuckie Periccio's mother.

397. Shut up!

398. You had sex with Beverly Periccio?

399. Yeah.

400. A whole summer's worth.

401. Okay, my turn.

402. Who was your most famous?

403. And Bobby Ditillio doesn't count,

404. he's only famous in New Jersey.

405. Okay...

406. you know Penn and Teller,

407. the magicians?

408. You fucked them?

409. Penn.

410. And I didn't fuck him...

411. I gave him head.

412. Which one is he?

413. The big one.

414. They were playing A.C., and they're funny as hell.

415. I was there with georgette.

416. He followed me into the ladies room

417. and he asked—

418. you lowlife cunt whore.

419. Get the fuck out of my sight!

420. Ow, you fucking shitbag!

421. In the fucking bathroom?

422. Who is it?

423. The FBI.

424. Come on, dickhead, open up.

425. For fuck's sake Paulie, it's two in the morning.

426. I know.

427. It's an outrage.

428. Adriana, you in there?

429. Yeah.

430. Sorry for the intrusion, honey.

431. Put something on and come out here.

432. You can't fuckin' do this like this!

433. I can't?

434. You must've not read up on the latest rules.

435. And put that piece away.

436. What's all this?

437. The Berezovsky brothers jacked a shipment from Milan

438. off pier 87.

439. These are for Ade.

440. Nice goods.

441. My broad wears a size 10.

442. Patsy, pack up some of these shoes.

443. Chrissy, you don't mind if I take my taste now?

444. He's not taking those.

445. Make yourselves comfortable.

446. We'll just have a little look around.

447. I'm still gonna get more shoes, right?

448. I don't know, now I have to go into my pocket for 'em.

449. This really sucks, Christopher.

450. You see the shit I go through?

451. Motherfucker!

452. What?

453. Nothing!

454. Leave it on, it's nice.

455. Meadow?

456. Didn't you hear me knocking?

457. I was sleeping, I thought it was Vanessa.

458. You don't answer the door when your friends knock?

459. They keep you from studying.

460. And my first class isn't until two.

461. I brought your laundry and I made you the ziti

462. with the sweet sausage that you like.

463. I'm so starved.

464. Jesus, it reeks of cigarettes in here.

465. You're not smoking, are you?

466. Caitlin.

467. I hope you're taking advantage of some of these offers here.

468. Look at this.

469. A boy just handed this to me.

470. A seminar on the CIA and the cultural cold war.

471. Look at this.

472. This looks interesting.

473. It's basic, we're way past that.

474. I'm reading the new Barbara Kingsolver.

475. I so wish I had time for fiction.

476. So, how is the drama queen doing anyway?

477. Fine.

478. Can we not talk about this, please?

479. I'm trying very hard here, med.

480. If you want me to leave, I will leave.

481. I have an hour before my lunch with Dean Ross.

482. You're going to lunch with the dean?

483. Can we not talk about this now, please?

484. Mom!

485. Yeah, his secretary called last week and invited me.

486. Come on, what about?

487. Money, I'm sure.

488. They probably want a donation from us.

489. How corrupt.

490. The real reason I stopped by to see you though

491. was to make sure you're recovered from this Noah thing.

492. I'm worried it'll affect your grades.

493. You call losing a wonderful man because of dad...

494. a thing?

495. Now, is that really what happened?

496. 'Cause you certainly kept seeing him plenty long enough

497. after that business with your father.

498. Look, don't drag me into whatever bullshit

499. accommodational pretense you've got worked out with daddy.

500. What was that, last night's reading assignment?

501. Alright...

502. let's hear it.

503. What's your big theory about me and daddy?

504. No way.

505. I'm not touching that.

506. Oh, fuckin' bitch!

507. Uncle Jun', what the hell are you doing?

508. Those marshals see you coming in here?

509. 'Cause I need being remanded to a fucking jail hospital

510. right now like I need a fuckin' case of crabs.

511. There's no car out there today

512. and I come up through the cellar like always.

513. Where the fuck is Bacala?

514. He's supposed to be doing this shit for you.

515. I sent him to the drugstore for more pepto.

516. You're getting better, that's the important thing.

517. You look better too.

518. If you're gonna lie to me,

519. tell me there's a broad waiting in the car

520. who wants to tongue my balls.

521. You want that, it's a phone call away.

522. You still want this?

523. I gotta get nutrition somehow.

524. Kennedy says eat only what I can sip through a straw.

525. What's going on with you and Ralphie Cifaretto?

526. Bacala tells me there's bad blood now.

527. You don't got enough in your plate?

528. I mean, in your blender?

529. Worry about your own problems.

530. When'd they say you could eat real food?

531. Who knows?

532. Kennedy's putting me under the knife again.

533. Whoa, back up.

534. More surgery?

535. Don't think you should talk to somebody else?

536. Get a second opinion.

537. Chemo?

538. Forget it.

539. With Kennedy it's cut, zip, over and out.

540. He has the hands of an angel.

541. And don't forget his name.

542. What?

543. I'm supposed to be impressed

544. 'cause the man's name is John Kennedy?

545. All the micks named their kids that after the guy got killed.

546. I loved that man.

547. He was older than me and now look.

548. You were gone a long time.

549. How many White Castles did you have?

550. I didn't, I swear.

551. I can smell them.

552. Let me call Cusamano.

553. He knows doctors in the city.

554. He sent Silvio's mother to one.

555. It can't hurt to make a call.

556. People come from the city to see Kennedy.

557. Good, then we won't be fighting traffic.

558. C'mon, Uncle Jun', you know I'm right.

559. Alright, you set it up, you come with me...

560. to listen and ask questions.

561. Good, good.

562. I'll let you know, alright?

563. Alright.

564. My nephew thinks I need a second opinion.

565. He doesn't like it that I'm going back under the knife.

566. Maybe there's something to that.

567. Another expert heard from.

568. Think on this, burger boy,

569. Anthony is a cunt hair away

570. from owning all of northern Jersey.

571. And I am that cunt hair.

572. So, maybe he has something else on his mind,

573. besides my full, complete and speedy recovery.

574. Oh, Junior, all this cynicism...

575. this can't be good for you.

576. Giorgio.

577. You speak Italian.

578. Second generation.

579. Really, Ross?

580. Rosetti.

581. 1,000 years of a proud name undone

582. with one stroke of a pen at Ellis Island.

583. A paisan.

584. And not far from you either.

585. New Brunswick.

586. Get out!

587. Any success I may have,

588. I credit to the Jersey public schools.

589. They were something in those days.

590. Where did you go to college?

591. Rutgers.

592. I went to Montclair State.

593. Good school.

594. What was your major?

595. Business administration.

596. To Meadow Soprano,

597. a valuable addition to the Columbia community.

598. Really?

599. Absolutely.

600. I don't know her personally,

601. but I've talked to her professors.

602. They say she's attentive, inquiring, does all her work,

603. and makes insightful contributions

604. to class discussions.

605. I am so glad to hear you say that.

606. And here I was worried about her adjusting.

607. Let's not tell her though.

608. We don't want her overconfident.

609. It seems like she sleeps an awful lot.

610. They all do.

611. Tony, what the hell?

612. You know, Ang,

613. driving over here,

614. I was thinking about how I was gonna handle this.

615. I been working on my anger lately.

616. So, I figured it'd be good if I could just quietly say

617. any kind of problem you got, financial or otherwise,

618. you come directly to me.

619. Please, leave Carmela the fuck out of it.

620. Like that.

621. Of course.

622. Then I saw the cadillac.

623. The money I give you...

624. you're driving a cadillac and you're looking for more?

625. Shot the whole plan.

626. So, remember this...

627. you see my wife, you talk about oven cleaner.

628. Anything else you come to me,

629. but think twice before you do.

630. Think about that fat fuck husband of yours

631. and what he did to you.

632. Him...

633. not me.

634. Coco, please, Coco, down!

635. Hey, hey, how are ya?

636. I'm sorry, Tony, I'm sorry.

637. Just push her away.

638. No, she's alright.

639. Good girl.

640. Good girl.

641. She don't look sick.

642. It comes and goes.

643. So, your children don't feel boxed in by the city?

644. We're out all the time.

645. Lately, Felicia has us all into kayaking on the Hudson.

646. You all do it together?

647. Yeah, the kids love it too.

648. They're already better at it than I am.

649. More wine?

650. Why not?

651. Remember I told you I spend about half my time

652. involved in student affairs?

653. Well, this is how I spend the other half.

654. Taking parents to lunch?

655. Development.

656. A fancy word for fund-raising.

657. The new student center.

658. We break ground next fall.

659. See the large black marble wall

660. to the right of the entrance?

661. Ah, yes.

662. That's where the donor names will be inscribed.

663. Everybody who donates gets their name up there?

664. The wall is reserved for people whose commitment

665. begins at the $50,000 level.

666. $50,000?

667. It's what the giving committee felt you'd be comfortable with.

668. Based on your past generosity to the Verbum Dei School.

669. You know what we gave to Verbum Dei?

670. I'm half embarrassed to say it, but it's my job to know.

671. All the information including tax benefits is in here.

672. Well, I will have to talk to my husband.

673. 50 grand?

674. You gotta be kidding me.

675. He talked an awful lot about Meadow's having

676. the best possible university experience.

677. Yeah, those Jew pricks are holding her hostage.

678. He's Italian.

679. Jews with better food.

680. They know from Verbum we're big givers.

681. We gave five grand a year.

682. That's a long way from 50.

683. This is college, Tony, New York city.

684. 5,000 is a slap in the face to these people.

685. Well, let 'em say no.

686. Here...

687. it's around five grand.

688. Run it through your household account

689. so, you can write him a check.

690. And that's it.

691. Not a penny more.

692. A five-F.U. based regimen with cisplatin and doxorubicin.

693. This is the treatment I would recommend.

694. Are you getting this?

695. Sort of.

696. So, the chemotherapy would be instead of the surgery?

697. But I can't guarantee even that.

698. We'll have to evaluate the results of the treatment.

699. I could end up having the chemo,

700. puking my guts out,

701. having the six hairs I have left fall out...

702. and still have to be cut again.

703. I'm afraid that's a possibility.

704. You see, with Kennedy you don't get these "maybes" and "possibilities."

705. Yeah, but you gotta have the surgery again.

706. Dr. Kennedy is an excellent surgeon.

707. Isn't there some way you people could just agree?

708. Sure.

709. Convene a tumor board.

710. What the hell is that?

711. A meeting of the Chief of Oncology,

712. an oncological pathologist,

713. and other specialists who then work together

714. to reach a consensus.

715. Then I guess you hear what they have to say?

716. Well, your uncle will not be present.

717. They will pass their decision along to both of you.

718. What you do then is still your decision.

719. And Kennedy will be there?

720. I assure you, no surgeon would miss it.

721. Not much to him, if you ask me.

722. What, you mean he's not Kennedy?

723. You make life and death decisions

724. because of a man's name.

725. It's only Sloan fuckin' Kettering,

726. the best cancer hospital in the whole world.

727. Excuse me.

728. And let me ask you something about this JFK worship of yours,

729. what about Hoffa and the Teamsters?

730. That was the brother.

731. Oh.

732. Dr. Krakower?

733. Hi, yes, thanks for calling me back.

734. I was referred by a Dr. Jennifer Melfi.

735. Yes, I would.

736. Any time that's good for you.

737. That's great, that's fine.

738. Grove Avenue, right.

739. Okay, I gotta go, bye bye.

740. Who was that?

741. It's the paving guy.

742. I'm thinking of having the driveway redone.

743. You smoking?

744. What is this, the third degree?

745. This says with pulp.

746. You like it with pulp.

747. Not this much, I like the one that says some pulp.

748. What the fuck was that for?

749. I'll write you up a list.

750. Oh, honey, I missed you so much.

751. You know, I figured out that this is the longest

752. we have ever been away from each other.

753. Did you miss me?

754. Sure.

755. Somebody drop this?

756. Well, how was it?

757. It was pretty good.

758. They had Playstation Two right in the hotel room.

759. And?

760. That was the sum total of your trip to your nation's capital?

761. I guess.

762. Alright, I'm sorry.

763. The orange juice is fine.

764. Whatever kind you wanna get is fine.

765. Fuck the orange juice.

766. Alright, I give up, what then?

767. All the money you give to Angie Bonpensiero

768. and who knows what other widows you've got on your payroll.

769. It's a business expense.

770. But there's not enough to make sure your own daughter

771. is protected?

772. I won't pay.

773. I know too much about extortion.

774. Big deal, he pat you down.

775. Pat me down I can do standing on my head.

776. It's every fucking thing else.

777. He came into my apartment in the middle of the night

778. and embarrassed the shit out of me in front of Adriana.

779. Yeah, I heard he strip searched you.

780. I'm not fucking kidding, Tony.

781. He's a sick fuck!

782. He was sniffing her fucking panties.

783. What?

784. You heard me.

785. Look, I don't deny that Paulie could be a little...

786. quirky.

787. He always has.

788. Christopher, you're moving up very fast.

789. Why do you think that is?

790. Are you gonna say it's 'cause I'm your fucking nephew?

791. So, be a big boy and suck it up.

792. The patient, Soprano comma Corrado,

793. male, caucasian, 72-years-old.

794. Presented three months ago with severe weight loss

795. and early satiety.

796. He was scoped and a four millimeter mass

797. in the greater curvature of his stomach was detected.

798. A CT scan revealed no evidence of metastasis.

799. Dr. Kennedy was referred in

800. and he recommended gastric resection for cure.

801. There were no surprises.

802. I thought we had it.

803. I was told we had clean margins.

804. Often, too little healthy tissue

805. was taken from around the tumor site.

806. Which leaves the possibility, as in this case,

807. for a false negative.

808. You want the man's whole stomach?

809. If there's a problem with the procedure,

810. we'll take it up on a board level.

811. Meanwhile, what are we gonna do with this guy?

812. He's high risk.

813. His pressure fell below 60 systolic for eight minutes

814. on the table.

815. The incision's still fresh.

816. I can do it in half the time.

817. If we don't do surgery, we do 5-F.U.

818. Which works how well on an adenocarcinoma?

819. Not very.

820. Which is why we decided to go in, in the first place.

821. So, what do I tell Mehta?

822. Mehta?

823. Sloan-Kettering Mehta?

824. Your patient sought a second opinion with Dr. Mehta.

825. Forget it then.

826. The last thing I need is to operate

827. with that little shit looking over my shoulder.

828. I'll tell him.

829. Yes, I'll have him there, thanks.

830. Don't sugarcoat it.

831. If you concentrate on your breathing,

832. it'll be easier all around.

833. The girl said she'd page Dr. Kennedy.

834. Where the fuck is he?

835. Alright, 20 minutes and I'll be back.

836. You go too easy on him.

837. Probably.

838. Hey, if my nephew Cubby wasn't dead,

839. I'd have a soft spot for him.

840. Did you sniff that girl's panties?

841. He told you that?

842. Fucking baby!

843. You got to apologize.

844. T, I'm not apologizing to him.

845. You were out of line.

846. He's gonna marry the girl, for Chrissakes.

847. As of the wedding day,

848. anything that touches her pussy is off limits.

849. You think it's all up?

850. Soon enough there'll be more where that came from.

851. Sounds like you were going at it pretty good in there.

852. My pain a source of entertainment to you?

853. You see me laughing?

854. I brought you a milk shake from "31 Flavors."

855. It's all your fucking fault anyway.

856. I'm throwing up day and night since I started the chemo.

857. Oh, right.

858. I gave you cancer.

859. You don't know what this is like, Anthony.

860. I can't do it.

861. Kennedy was right.

862. What's he got to say?

863. I can't get him on the phone.

864. The nurses won't put me through to him.

865. Why not?

866. I leave messages at the hospital, at the office.

867. I sent him a box of cohibas.

868. I couldn't get past reception.

869. He didn't call you back?

870. Who knows if they even tell him?

871. Last night the machine says,

872. "if it's an emergency, press six."

873. So, I press six.

874. Still no call back, 24 hours later.

875. He must be very busy.

876. Yeah, that must be it.

877. You got his number?

878. Three more weeks.

879. Three more fuckin' weeks.

880. His fuckin' answerin' machine.

881. What are ya gonna do?

882. These doctors, it's not like on TV.

883. Dr. Kennedy, this is Tony Soprano,

884. Corrado Soprano's nephew.

885. My cell phone is 917-555-0157.

886. Call me back any time, day or night.

887. It's important.

888. Batter up.

889. Bye.

890. Now what?

891. Get in.

892. You're not even married yet,

893. you're dipping into whores already.

894. Didn't cost me a quarter.

895. I don't pay for it.

896. How'd you find me?

897. Better be careful.

898. If I can do it, so can your bride-to-be.

899. So, what is this?

900. Some new rule about who I fuck?

901. You want more shoes, what?

902. No, funny thing is they don't even fit her.

903. I don't know why I thought she was a size 10.

904. I don't know either.

905. I'm here to tell you one thing...

906. you ever go whining to the big man again

907. about shit between you and me,

908. we'll have a problem, my friend.

909. You seen these?

910. The fuck is that?

911. My godson got it for me.

912. They're all over the fuckin' place,

913. we gotta bring one into the club.

914. Watch and learn, Phil.

915. Watch and learn.

916. What are you doing?

917. Hey, doc, it's me, Tony.

918. Corrado Soprano's nephew.

919. You belong to this club?

920. Me? No, no, no.

921. I came here to see you.

922. If it's about your uncle,

923. you'll have to call my office.

924. You might need a new secretary,

925. I don't think you're getting all your messages.

926. For you...

927. titanium.

928. I use one, added 10 yards to my drives.

929. Thanks, but I really can't accept it.

930. For everything you've done for my uncle.

931. Anyway, what am I gonna do with it?

932. I've already got one and Mr. Williams here...

933. he don't play.

934. Right?

935. Stupid fucking game.

936. What can I do with it?

937. What is it, jack?

938. He'll just be a minute.

939. Well, I could use a little extra distance.

940. Who couldn't?

941. You know, my uncle, he's not doing so well.

942. He's got a bad reaction to that chemo.

943. That happens all the time,

944. there's nothing that I can really do.

945. You know, there are worse things

946. that can happen to a person than cancer.

947. My uncle thinks he's gonna die.

948. He's convinced of it.

949. You know how old people are with their superstitions.

950. He thinks it's 'cause he went against you.

951. I was his surgeon, that's all.

952. You got a bee on your hat.

953. Show that man the respect he deserves.

954. Answer his phone calls.

955. Cheryl, make sure Mr. Soprano is scheduled for—

956. just remember it.

957. Everybody's marriage has problems.

958. Is he seeing another woman?

959. You can make that plural.

960. Yes, he sees other women.

961. I sort of look the other way.

962. I want to help him.

963. Do you?

964. Moments ago you used the word "divorce."

965. I said I was considering divorce.

966. I may be overstepping my boundaries here,

967. but you are Jewish, aren't you?

968. Is that relevant?

969. Well, us Catholics,

970. we place a great deal of sto in the sanctity of the family.

971. And I'm not sure that your people—

972. I've been married for 31 years.

973. Then you know how difficult it can be.

974. He's a good man,

975. he's a good father.

976. You tell me he's a depressed criminal.

977. Prone to anger,

978. serially unfaithful.

979. Is that your definition of a good man?

980. I thought psychiatrists weren't supposed to be judgmental.

981. Many patients want to be excused for their current predicament

982. because of events that occurred in their childhood.

983. That's what psychiatry has become in America.

984. Visit any shopping mall or ethnic pride parade

985. to witness the results.

986. What we say in here stays in here, right?

987. By ethical code and by law.

988. His crimes...

989. they are...

990. organized crime.

991. The mafia?

992. Oh, Jesus.

993. Oh, so what?

994. So what?

995. He betrays me every week with these whores.

996. Probably the least of his misdeeds.

997. You can leave now,

998. or you can stay and hear what I have to say.

999. You're gonna charge the same anyway.

1000. I won't take your money.

1001. That's a new one.

1002. You must trust your initial impulse

1003. and consider leaving him.

1004. You'll never be able to feel good about yourself,

1005. never be able to quell the feelings of guilt and shame

1006. that you talk about...

1007. as long as you're his accomplice.

1008. You're wrong about the accomplice part though.

1009. Are you sure?

1010. All I do is make sure he's got clean clothes in his closet,

1011. and dinner on his table.

1012. So, enabler would be a more accurate job description

1013. for you than accomplice.

1014. My apologies.

1015. So...

1016. you think I need to...

1017. define my boundaries more clearly,

1018. keep a certain distance,

1019. not internalize my—

1020. what did I just say?

1021. Leave him.

1022. Take only the children.

1023. What's left of them and go.

1024. My priest said I should try and work with him,

1025. help him to be a better man.

1026. How's that going?

1027. I...

1028. have you ever read "Crime and Punishment"?

1029. Dostoyevsky?

1030. It's not an easy read.

1031. It's about guilt and redemption

1032. and I think were your husband to turn himself in,

1033. read this book and reflect on his crimes

1034. every day for seven years

1035. in his cell,

1036. then he might be redeemed.

1037. I would have to get a lawyer,

1038. find an apartment.

1039. Arrange for child support—

1040. you're not listening.

1041. I'm not charging you because I won't take blood money.

1042. And you can't either.

1043. One thing you can never say...

1044. that you haven't been told.

1045. I see.

1046. You're right, I see.

1047. You're fucking poisoning me.

1048. I don't know how much more of this I can take.

1049. You taking good care of this young man?

1050. Jesus, Dr. Kennedy.

1051. How you doing, guy?

1052. I been busy, you alright?

1053. Doc, don't bullshit a bullshitter.

1054. Is this shit gonna work

1055. or should we go back in the room?

1056. You got a top guy here.

1057. Him?

1058. The guy I'd go see if I needed to.

1059. I'll be a sonofabitch.

1060. The important thing is

1061. you stay strong and keep fighting, alright?

1062. That's my home number.

1063. You start to feel punk, you call me.

1064. Thanks, Dr. Kennedy.

1065. I'll check back on you Wednesday.

1066. Take good care of this young fella.

1067. Carm.

1068. What?

1069. You sick?

1070. Everybody else in this family sleeps all day,

1071. I thought I'd try it.

1072. You, uh...

1073. depressed...

1074. or what?

1075. I figure in the division of labor around here,

1076. that's your job.

1077. 'Cause if you want to go to therapy

1078. on your own or something...

1079. I've noticed you been a little tense lately.

1080. That's rich.

1081. You suggesting I go to a shrink.

1082. I don't have the time.

1083. I'll still go to yours if you want.

1084. You know best.

1085. That dean called today.

1086. Well, that can't be good.

1087. I told him to put us down for the $50,000.

1088. Carmela, I gave you five.

1089. Now...

1090. maybe I could go another five, maybe 10,

1091. but that's enough.

1092. Tony, you gotta do something nice for me today,

1093. this is what I want.

1094. You gotta do this.

1095. Alright, I'll go to 10.

1096. That should be enough for those Morningside Heights gangsters.

1097. I already told him 50.

1098. 50 g's.

1099. Yes.

1100. You look like you could use a night off from cookin'.

1101. What do you say we go out?