1. D'oh!Copy !req
2. - Thanks for letting me skip school...Copy !req
3. to see the team come back
from the championship, Dad.Copy !req
4. I always say, a boy can
learn more at an airport...Copy !req
5. than he can at any school.Copy !req
6. Hey. I need to see your
claim checks for that luggage.Copy !req
7. Oh, of course.
I have it right here.Copy !req
8. I'll need to see yours too.Copy !req
9. - You got it!
- I'll take your word for it.Copy !req
10. - You're just doing your job.Copy !req
11. - Do you have anything by Robert Ludlum?
- Get out.Copy !req
12. Look at the outrageous markup.Copy !req
13. You magnificent bastard.
I salute you!Copy !req
14. I just got a bunch of
fruity Easter eggs.Copy !req
15. Ew! Another liver transplant.Copy !req
16. Oh, no. Not again!Copy !req
17. You're not gettir away
that easy, little fella.Copy !req
18. Have you heard of
Krishna consciousness?Copy !req
19. This, Bart, is a crazy man.Copy !req
20. Do unto others as you would
have them do unto you.Copy !req
21. Right. That'll work.Copy !req
22. A new and better life awaits you
on our distant home planet, Blisstonia.Copy !req
23. Hmm. Makes sense.Copy !req
24. We're having a free get-acquainted session
at our resort this weekend.Copy !req
25. How much is this
free resort weekend?Copy !req
26. - It's free.
- And when is this weekend?Copy !req
27. - It's this weekend.
- Uh-huh. And how much does it cost?Copy !req
28. - Um, it's free.
- I see. And when is it?Copy !req
29. - It's this weekend.
- And what are you charging for this free weekend?Copy !req
30. - Come on, Dad. The team's arriving.
- It's free, right?Copy !req
31. Hey. Look. There's a big crowd
to welcome us back, even though we lost.Copy !req
32. Hey, I'll give you somethir to cry about,
you loser. You can't catch a football?Copy !req
33. Let's see if you can catch a rock.Copy !req
34. I've never heard
of these Movementarians.Copy !req
35. - Are they some kind of church?
- Who cares what it is?Copy !req
36. The point is these are some decent, generous
people that I can take advantage of.Copy !req
37. - But what if they try to talk us into something?
- Marge, Marge, Marge.Copy !req
38. Remember when
those smooth-talking guys...Copy !req
39. tried to sell me
a time-share vacation condo?Copy !req
40. - You bought four of them.
Thank God the check bounced.
- So I beat the system.Copy !req
41. Watch yourself, Dad.
You're the highly suggestible type.Copy !req
42. Yes, I am the highly
suggestible type.Copy !req
43. Welcome, brother.Copy !req
44. Out of my way, jerk-ass!Copy !req
45. - Hi, how are y-Copy !req
46. It certainly is a beautiful day.
We should thank the Leader.Copy !req
47. - Who the hell is that? Some kind of leader?
- Yes.Copy !req
48. He's the head of our perfect family.Copy !req
49. And when our galactic vehicle is complete,
he will take us to our new home: Blisstonia.Copy !req
50. Why don't you come chat with us about
the Leader at the welcome center?Copy !req
51. - Will there be beer?
- Beer is not allowed.Copy !req
52. Homer no function beer well without.Copy !req
53. Would you rather have beer
or complete and utter contentment?Copy !req
54. What kind of beer?Copy !req
55. The Leader knows how miserable
you, Marge, Lisa, Bart and Maggie are.Copy !req
56. Really? I'm surprised about Maggie.Copy !req
57. Just come up and watch our orientation film.
You're free to leave at any time.Copy !req
58. Wow! A free movie!
Thanks!Copy !req
59. Out of my way, jerk-ass!Copy !req
60. Once we collect enough money for fuel...Copy !req
61. our leader will throw open
the doors of the forbidden barn...Copy !req
62. where we will all board our intergalactic vehicle-
rows one through 30 first.Copy !req
63. Upon our arrival, we will begin our new,
perfect lives on Blisstonia...Copy !req
64. well-known for
its high levels ofbliss.Copy !req
65. I don't know about you,
but they're not exactly winning me over...Copy !req
66. with these lousy
production values here.Copy !req
67. I'm gonna slip out.Copy !req
68. You're free to leave whenever
you want, but would you mind telling us why?Copy !req
69. Oh, I just didn't, uh-
I didn't think, um-Copy !req
70. Oh, it's- it's pretty good.Copy !req
71. Man, this whole place puffs of the wacky-tabbacky.
I'm out of here.Copy !req
72. Going somewhere?
Uh, though you're free to do so.Copy !req
73. Uh-Copy !req
74. No. Just rearranging my underwear.
Ah. There it is.Copy !req
75. When you surrender
yourself to the Movementarians...Copy !req
76. you are guaranteed a perfect life
of serenity, love and loving serenity.Copy !req
77. - Not a guarantee.
- Loving serenity. It's about damn time!Copy !req
78. - I love the Leader.
- The Leader is perfect.Copy !req
79. Wait. I'm confused about the movie.Copy !req
80. So the cops knew that Internal Affairs
was setting them up?Copy !req
81. What are you talking about?
There's nothing like that in there.Copy !req
82. You see, when I get bored I make up my own
movie. I have a very short attention span.Copy !req
83. - But our point is very simple. You see, when-
- Oh, look! A bird!Copy !req
84. The circle of judgment never fails
to destroy their self-esteem.Copy !req
85. Then he'll be ours to mold.Copy !req
86. Let the judgment begin.
I'll get the ball rolling.Copy !req
87. - You're a fat idiot.
- Yeah! Lose some weight!Copy !req
88. - Hey, man. You're fat.
- Fatso.Copy !req
89. - Moron.Copy !req
90. - Fat too.
- Well, yeah. I guess I could lose a few pounds.Copy !req
91. And I can be kind of thick sometimes.Copy !req
92. You've failed at everything
you've ever tried.Copy !req
93. Whoa. You've got my number
on that one, buddy.Copy !req
94. This is a smart group.Copy !req
95. And your stink
brings tears to my eyes.Copy !req
96. Now wait a minute, Moe.Copy !req
97. - Oh. My mistake.Copy !req
98. Why isn't our low-protein gruel
wearing down his resistance like all the others?Copy !req
99. It doesn't wear down your resistance
if you eat a month's supply. He even ate mine.Copy !req
100. - You gonna finish that, bony?
- Oh, "griven"-Copy !req
101. Let's try the chant.
Everyone loves a droning, repetitive chant.Copy !req
102. Attention, everyone. Let's all give thanks
to the Leader for this glorious day.Copy !req
103. The Leader is good. The Leader is great.Copy !req
104. We surrender our will
as of this date.Copy !req
105. The Leader is good.
The Leader is great.Copy !req
106. We surrender our will
as of this date.Copy !req
107. It's no use. He's obviously the most powerful
mind we've ever dealt with.Copy !req
108. Or-Copy !req
109. I mean-Copy !req
110. I love the Leader.Copy !req
111. - You what?
- Come again, Marge?Copy !req
112. - You what?
- I've joined the Movementarians.
And so have all of you.Copy !req
113. - We what?
- All I had to give them...Copy !req
114. was our life savings,
the deed to the house...Copy !req
115. and a commitment
of 10 trillion years of labor.Copy !req
116. I can't go along with this, Homer.Copy !req
117. Marge, when I join an underground cult,
I expect a little support from my family.Copy !req
118. Dad, do you think
you might have been brainwashed?Copy !req
119. I have not been brainwashed.Copy !req
120. Kill the girl.
Kill the girl.Copy !req
121. - Homer!
- What? What did I say?Copy !req
122. Church, cult. Cult, church. So we get bored
someplace else every Sunday.Copy !req
123. - Does this really change our day-to-day lives?
- Of course not-Copy !req
124. except that we're all moving to
the Movementarian agricultural compound...Copy !req
125. - to be near the Leader and serve him.
- I'm not leaving my home.Copy !req
126. - Oh, yes, you are.
I'm afraid it's our home now.Copy !req
127. This house will become the new
local welcome center for this district.Copy !req
128. And it didn't cost us a dime.Copy !req
129. Springfield has been overrun
by a strange and almost certainly evil sect...Copy !req
130. calling themselves
"the Movementarians."Copy !req
131. In exchange for your home
and all your money...Copy !req
132. the leader of this way-out
and wrong religion...Copy !req
133. claims he'll take believers away
on his spaceship to the planet Blisstonia.Copy !req
134. Excuse my editorial laugh.
But-Copy !req
135. Ladies and gentlemen, I've just learned of
a change in this statiors management.Copy !req
136. Welcome, Movementarians.
Continue to improve our lives.Copy !req
137. I love you, perfect Leader,
and new C.E.O. of KBBL Broadcasting.Copy !req
138. I love you, perfect Leader,
and new C.E.O. of KBBL Broadcasting.Copy !req
139. Homer Simpson,
your family will be housed here...Copy !req
140. for the first 100,000 years.Copy !req
141. - Then something might open up in a double.
- Why even unpack?Copy !req
142. - Dad and all these other people...Copy !req
143. are obviously the products
of mental conditioning.Copy !req
144. Yeah. Maybe it'll wear off,
like his interest in C.B. radio.Copy !req
145. That's a negatory, good buddy!Copy !req
146. I kind of think it's cool.
Just pretend you're in a zombie movie.Copy !req
147. Besides, this is just
another place...Copy !req
148. for me to wreak my special brand
of hysterical havoc.Copy !req
149. These rubes in robes haven't met
the likes of Bart Simpson before.Copy !req
150. I love the Leader.Copy !req
151. Of course you do.Copy !req
152. This so-called "new religion"...Copy !req
153. is nothing but a pack of
weird rituals and chants...Copy !req
154. designed to take away
the money of fools.Copy !req
155. Let us say the Lord's Prayer 40 times,
but first let's pass the collection plate.Copy !req
156. Looks like slim pickings today, Reverend.Copy !req
157. Oh, Lord. Uh, try
the emergency plate, Ned.Copy !req
158. - I don't think that's gonna do it.
- Um-Copy !req
159. See, Marge?
Our lives are so much better now.Copy !req
160. You two, stop talking and resume
the lima bean harvest.Copy !req
161. When we got married, you promised me
my harvesting days were over.Copy !req
162. - What's going on?Copy !req
163. - Whoa.
- What's goir on?Copy !req
164. Look!
The forbidden barn opens.Copy !req
165. - He's coming!Copy !req
166. Oh, boy.
We get to see the Leader pass by.Copy !req
167. We toil in the fields,
and he rides around in a Rolls-Royce?Copy !req
168. Yes, it would be nice if he'd buy American,
but what are you gonna do?Copy !req
169. I'm covered in the dust
of the Leader. He favors me!Copy !req
170. I am even dustier.
Dustier than thou!Copy !req
171. Oh, look who the new pet is.Copy !req
172. I've never been so happy.Copy !req
173. Smithers, why haven't I heard
of this "the Leader"?Copy !req
174. He's as rich and wicked as I,
but he seems to enjoy tax-exempt status.Copy !req
175. Actually, sir, with our creative bookkeeping...Copy !req
176. and corporate loopholes,
we only pay three dollars a year.Copy !req
177. You're right. We're getting screwed.Copy !req
178. There must be
something I can do about this.Copy !req
179. Wait. Yes.Copy !req
180. I think I know just the thing.Copy !req
181. Uh, sir? You have to tell me what your plan is,
or- or nothing will happen.Copy !req
182. Oh, yes. Of course.
The plan.Copy !req
183. - You see me as a god, right, Smithers?
- Absolutely, sir.Copy !req
184. - You'd kneel before me.
- Boy, would I!Copy !req
185. Yes. Uh, then I'll form my own religion
with its own symbol.Copy !req
186. We'll use this special "K."Copy !req
187. I believe that's already
a breakfast cereal, sir.Copy !req
188. - And people worship it?
- In a way.Copy !req
189. All right then.
Uh, how about this?Copy !req
190. Uh, why don't you leave
the symbol to me, sir?Copy !req
191. Ladies and gentlemen,
behold your new god...Copy !req
192. Mr. Burns.Copy !req
193. - Ahoy-hoy, lowly mortals.Copy !req
194. In addition to working for me,
you may now praise me as your Almighty.Copy !req
195. Amen, sir. Mmm!Copy !req
196. Uh, we'll try this again tomorrow.Copy !req
197. Ah, he's all right.
But he's no bowl of Special "K."Copy !req
198. This is ridiculous.
We're already married.Copy !req
199. But, Marge, we're not mass married.Copy !req
200. At least you
got to choose your mate.Copy !req
201. We got matched up on the printout.Copy !req
202. - Hey. Remember our agreement. I'm the man.
- You're the man!Copy !req
203. - I could have done a lot worse, Mother.
- Speak for yourself.Copy !req
204. So, do you enjoy comic books?Copy !req
205. And who can tell me where thunder
and lightning come from?Copy !req
206. Yes, Bart?Copy !req
207. The Leader, ma'am.Copy !req
208. Very good, Bart.
And who invented Morse code?Copy !req
209. Oh. I should know this one.Copy !req
210. The-The Leader?Copy !req
211. Ah. Correct again.Copy !req
212. He's wrong!
You're wrong!Copy !req
213. The whole damn system is wrong!Copy !req
214. What's the matter, Lisa?Copy !req
215. You used to be such a good student.Copy !req
216. Don't you want to please your teachers
and get good grades?Copy !req
217. Grades?Copy !req
218. These lima beans are even better
than the ones we had for breakfast and lunch.Copy !req
219. Oh! A lima bean that looks
just like the Leader!Copy !req
220. - I'll put it with the others.
- Homer...Copy !req
221. you know I always try to put
the best face on everything...Copy !req
222. but there's no face
on that damn bean!Copy !req
223. We hate it here!
And your family wants to leave.Copy !req
224. No, we don't, Mother.Copy !req
225. We love the Leader.Copy !req
226. No!Copy !req
227. All righty.
Time for bed.Copy !req
228. I'm leaving this place,
and you'd better step aside.Copy !req
229. Lady, people are free to go
whenever they wish.Copy !req
230. Hi-yah!Copy !req
231. Oh. I never thought
I'd have to do this again.Copy !req
232. Reverend Lovejoy!Copy !req
233. You've gotta help me.Copy !req
234. My entire family has been taken in
by the evil Movementarians.Copy !req
235. Oh, I feel for you, my child,
and I'd like to help you.Copy !req
236. - Now, how are we going to get my Homie back?Copy !req
237. - I'll kidnap him for 50...Copy !req
238. deprogram him for 100,
and I'll kill him for 500.Copy !req
239. No, no, no.
Just the first two.Copy !req
240. All right. I'll throw in
the killir for free.Copy !req
241. - Yea! Here comes the Leader!Copy !req
242. What an honor.
We've been called into the presence of-Copy !req
243. Marge? You're the Leader?Copy !req
244. You don't look anything
like the beans.Copy !req
245. - Knock him out, Reverend!
- Ow! Ooh!Copy !req
246. - Ow!
- Oh, the devil has given him superhuman strength.Copy !req
247. Give me that,
you noodle-armed choir boy!Copy !req
248. - Ow!
- Well, that didn't do it, Mr. Kilt.Copy !req
249. Look. Let's the three of us
try it together.Copy !req
250. Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!Copy !req
251. Oh! Ooh! Why?Copy !req
252. Oh, you're gonna break like matchsticks.
I promise you that!Copy !req
253. Hey. I made some Rice Krispie squares
for our hungry deprogrammerinos.Copy !req
254. Aw, man! You ruined
the atmosphere, ya daft pansy!Copy !req
255. Well, this is my rumpus room.Copy !req
256. Ach! Don't call it that!Copy !req
257. Outsiders have kidnapped
some of our property.Copy !req
258. We must respond with
our deadliest weapon.Copy !req
259. The lawyers.Copy !req
260. - Go! Go! Go!Copy !req
261. Attention, all citizens.Copy !req
262. - Even though the Leader himself
is completely nonviolent-Copy !req
263. he urges you to be as violent as you like
in capturing the Simpsons.Copy !req
264. What are you doing?
They're not here, you idiots!Copy !req
265. Idiots? That's slander, sir,
and we have it on tape.Copy !req
266. All right. I'll get out my checkbook.Copy !req
267. - What was that?
- Ah, I said-Copy !req
268. So, you kids really
love the Leader, huh?Copy !req
269. Even more than your parents?Copy !req
270. - Yeah. No contest.
- Of course. Absolutely.Copy !req
271. All right already.
But do you love the Leader...Copy !req
272. more than having your
very own brand-new hover bikes?Copy !req
273. What do you have to say
about the Leader now, huh? Huh?Copy !req
274. - What Leader?
- The hell with him. He can taking a flying leap.Copy !req
275. - And who do you love now?
- Hover bikes!Copy !req
276. Close enough.Copy !req
277. Yea!Copy !req
278. Sorry, kids.
There's no such thing as hover bikes.Copy !req
279. They're just a couple of
Huffys on a fishing line.Copy !req
280. - But we heard them hovering.
- Oh, I'm afraid I played a dirty
part in this little charade.Copy !req
281. - Well, can we at least keep the bikes?
- Oh, no. No, no. No, no, no.Copy !req
282. They're due back at the store by 6:00.
Get off'em. Get off. Off. Get off.Copy !req
283. All right.Copy !req
284. Now, what's so all-fire great
about your fancy-pants Leader?Copy !req
285. The Leader knows all and sees all.Copy !req
286. Ooh. Well, that is impressive.Copy !req
287. And he's going to take us
to a wonderful new planet.Copy !req
288. Oh, this Leader-
He sounds like a grand fella.Copy !req
289. Willie, I'm not sure
we're making any headway here.Copy !req
290. Would you shut up, woman.
He's talking about my leader.Copy !req
291. Uh, maybe we should take
a little break-a-rooney, huh?Copy !req
292. Anyone like a draft beer?Copy !req
293. Beer?Copy !req
294. Would you like
a tall, frosty one, Homer?Copy !req
295. No. Must resist temptation.Copy !req
296. Go ahead. Give in. Beer! Beer!Copy !req
297. Ooh. These cotton-poly blends are so comfortable.Copy !req
298. Go on, Homer. Our commandments
clearly state that beer is all right.Copy !req
299. Try some.Copy !req
300. - This man is coming with us.
- Homer, you don't have to go with them.Copy !req
301. But I want to go.Copy !req
302. Well, I would say
the matter is settled.Copy !req
303. You know, I pride myself on being a good host,
so I'm obliged to offer you a beer...Copy !req
304. but I'm so darn mad
it's gonna be mostly head.Copy !req
305. Homer, come back!Copy !req
306. - That's my husband!
- He's our husband now.Copy !req
307. Yea!Copy !req
308. I'm glad I'm back...Copy !req
309. because the moment
that sweet, sweet beer hit my tongue...Copy !req
310. I was born again!Copy !req
311. - Hallelujah!Copy !req
312. Now I can show all of you
what I've come to realize.Copy !req
313. The reason we're not allowed
in the forbidden barn...Copy !req
314. is because there is no
intergalactic spaceship.Copy !req
315. He's taken our money
just so he can...Copy !req
316. build one hell of a spaceship!Copy !req
317. - Homer Simpson...Copy !req
318. because of your lack of faith,
you've ruined mankind's chance for salvation.Copy !req
319. - Whoops.
- Nice goir there, Homer.Copy !req
320. Oh, my gosh. Maybe he was
telling the truth about everything.Copy !req
321. Oh, mercy.
He's the real deal!Copy !req
322. Come back.
Come back!Copy !req
323. Willie still loves ya, O Great One!Copy !req
324. Stranger, you're a-trespassir
on my dirt farm.Copy !req
325. Uh, do you happen to need a messiah?Copy !req
326. No, but I'll take
them sacks of money from ya.Copy !req
327. I should have stayed
with the Promise Keepers.Copy !req
328. Damn it! It fell apart
like everything else I've ever believed in.Copy !req
329. Oh, I guess it's back to
good old-fashioned voodoo.Copy !req
330. Wow! I need a drink!Copy !req
331. Come with me.Copy !req
332. Uh, is that your collar, Reverend?Copy !req
333. Uh, yes.
How did that get down there?Copy !req
334. Come back to papa, baby.Copy !req
335. To think, I turned to a cult
for mindless happiness...Copy !req
336. - when I had beer all along.Copy !req
337. And you, Marge, the bringer of beer.Copy !req
338. - It's wonderful to think for ourselves again.
- You said it, Sister.Copy !req
339. You are watching Fox.Copy !req
340. We are watching Fox.Copy !req
341. - Shh!Copy !req