1. The Simpsons.Copy !req
2. Good morning, sir.Copy !req
3. Care for some coffee?Copy !req
4. No, the promise
of a new dayCopy !req
5. is more than enough
exhilaration for me.Copy !req
6. Smithers?Copy !req
7. Coffee.Copy !req
8. We need some excitement
around here.Copy !req
9. Chinese checkers
or domestic, sir?Copy !req
10. No, no, something fun...Copy !req
11. Something the men will enjoy,
like a safety drill.Copy !req
12. But what kind?Copy !req
13. Eh, meltdown alert?
Mad dog drill?Copy !req
14. Blimp attack?Copy !req
15. Ah, I think a good old-fashioned
fire drill today.Copy !req
16. All right,
popcorn's ready.Copy !req
17. Hey,
that's the fire alarm.Copy !req
18. We got to get
out of here.Copy !req
19. Wait for me.Copy !req
20. Come on, come on,
come on!Copy !req
21. Look out!Copy !req
22. Get out of my way!Copy !req
23. Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire!
Fire! Fire!Copy !req
24. Is it supposed
to take this long?Copy !req
25. What's a good timeCopy !req
26. for a mass evacuation
of the entire plant?Copy !req
27. 45 seconds.Copy !req
28. And what's our time so far?Copy !req
29. I don't know, sir.Copy !req
30. This stopwatch only
goes up to 15 minutes.Copy !req
31. Damnation.Copy !req
32. What kind of slow coaches
do I have working for me?Copy !req
33. Ah, here comes
one of our fellows now.Copy !req
34. I think I won,
Mr. Burns.Copy !req
35. Yes, you won,
all right.Copy !req
36. You won more
than you bargained for.Copy !req
37. Whoo-hoo!Copy !req
38. What a disgraceful display.Copy !req
39. I've seen more orderly behavior
in a Ritz brothers film.Copy !req
40. You all need
a serious lesson in teamwork.Copy !req
41. Maybe he does,
but I don't.Copy !req
42. Hey,
you take that back.Copy !req
43. No, you take
that back.Copy !req
44. Yeah! Yeah!Copy !req
45. Hit him, Carl!
You, too, Lenny!Copy !req
46. So Burns is going
to make us allCopy !req
47. go on a stupid
corporate retreatCopy !req
48. up in the mountains
to learn about teamwork,Copy !req
49. which means we'll have
to cancel our plansCopy !req
50. to hang around here.Copy !req
51. Teamwork is overrated.Copy !req
52. Think about it. I mean,
what team was Babe Ruth on?Copy !req
53. - Who knows?
- Yankees.Copy !req
54. Sharing is a
bunch of bull, too.Copy !req
55. And helping others.Copy !req
56. And what's all this crapCopy !req
57. I've been hearing
about tolerance?Copy !req
58. Hmm. Your ideas
are intriguing to me,Copy !req
59. and I wish to subscribe
to your newsletter.Copy !req
60. But I think we have to go
on the retreat anyway.Copy !req
61. Well, here we are.Copy !req
62. All right,
let me start offCopy !req
63. by telling you this will not
be a walk in the park.Copy !req
64. This will be
the most arduousCopy !req
65. and backbreaking
weekend of your life.Copy !req
66. I cannot overemphasize
the dangers which...Copy !req
67. Did you bring your family,
Simpson?Copy !req
68. Yes, sir.
I thought I was supposed to.Copy !req
69. Ah, imbecile.Copy !req
70. Simpson, your family
will have to remain here.Copy !req
71. - Aw, man.
- Aw...Copy !req
72. Don't worry, kids.
This is a national park.Copy !req
73. We can have lots of fun.Copy !req
74. Oh, I'm afraid that's
no longer true, ma'am.Copy !req
75. Budget cutbacks
have forced usCopy !req
76. to eliminate anything
the least bit entertaining.Copy !req
77. Well, uh, see you.Copy !req
78. Each two-man team will work
its way through the wildernessCopy !req
79. to a cabin hidden somewhere
on this mountain.Copy !req
80. The routes are treacherous,
so use your maps.Copy !req
81. I lost my map.Copy !req
82. You haven't been
issued a map yet.Copy !req
83. When you arrive
at the cabin,Copy !req
84. there will be
a congratulatory partyCopy !req
85. with sandwiches and
moderately-priced champagne.Copy !req
86. Now, as an added incentive,Copy !req
87. the second to last team
to arrive at the cabinCopy !req
88. will receive
an hilarious.Copy !req
89. "World's Worst
Employee" Trophy.Copy !req
90. Hey, this sounds
like fun.Copy !req
91. And the last team
to arrive will be fired.Copy !req
92. And to show that
I'm not playing favorites,Copy !req
93. both Smithers and I
will be participating.Copy !req
94. Who knows? I might be
the unlucky one who gets fired.Copy !req
95. Not bloody likely.Copy !req
96. I've placed all your
names in this hat.Copy !req
97. Thank you.Copy !req
98. Now, pair off
as I draw your names.Copy !req
99. Lenny and... Carl.Copy !req
100. Aw, nuts.
I mean, um...Copy !req
101. Aw, nuts.Copy !req
102. Fong and... Zutroy.Copy !req
103. Kimball and... Dawson.Copy !req
104. Haney and... Drucker.Copy !req
105. Simpson and... Burns?Copy !req
106. Quiet, you fool.Copy !req
107. You're on the one team
that can't possibly be fired.Copy !req
108. Sir, this can't be right.Copy !req
109. You assured me
this drawing was riggedCopy !req
110. so we'd be teammates.Copy !req
111. Yes, well, frankly,Copy !req
112. you've been
bit of a pill lately.Copy !req
113. Why do we always
fight on vacation?Copy !req
114. Now, there's only
one name left.Copy !req
115. Whoever it is
will be paired with me.Copy !req
116. And that person is...Copy !req
117. Waylon Smithers.Copy !req
118. Perfect.
That's just perfect.Copy !req
119. Prepare for the
adventure of a lifetimeCopy !req
120. as you fight for survivalCopy !req
121. against the merciless
forces of nature.Copy !req
122. Toe your marks...Copy !req
123. Get set...Copy !req
124. Go!Copy !req
125. Ready, Mr. Burns?Copy !req
126. One moment.Copy !req
127. Only who can prevent
forest fires?Copy !req
128. You pressed "You,"
referring to me.Copy !req
129. That is incorrect.
The correct answer is you.Copy !req
130. Mom, can Lisa and I
play outsideCopy !req
131. away from the bear?Copy !req
132. Okay, but when you start
getting apple-cheeked,Copy !req
133. it's time to come in.Copy !req
134. How could you do this
to me, Mr. Burns?Copy !req
135. After all
I've done for you.Copy !req
136. Why, if you were here,Copy !req
137. I'd kick you right
in your bony old behind!Copy !req
138. Bony old behind!Copy !req
139. Why, thank you, Simpson.Copy !req
140. I have been
watching my figure.Copy !req
141. Lise, Lise, come here.Copy !req
142. I found two snowflakes
that are exactly alike.Copy !req
143. Really?
Let me see.Copy !req
144. Oops. Sorry.Copy !req
145. Hi, Mr. Smithers.Copy !req
146. Oh, great.
It's the Bobbsey twins.Copy !req
147. Well, take your
prying eyes elsewhere.Copy !req
148. Oh, I'm sorry.Copy !req
149. It hasn't been
a good day.Copy !req
150. If I don't get to the top
of the mountain real soon,Copy !req
151. - I could get fired.
- We'll help you.Copy !req
152. I have a watch
with a minute hand.Copy !req
153. All right,
you can come.Copy !req
154. What time is it?Copy !req
155. 12:80.Copy !req
156. No, wait.Copy !req
157. Wait.
What comes after 12?Copy !req
158. One.Copy !req
159. No, after 12.Copy !req
160. Tell me, Simpson,Copy !req
161. if an opportunity arose
for taking a small shortcut,Copy !req
162. you wouldn't be averse
to taking it, would you?Copy !req
163. Um, not as such.Copy !req
164. Neither would I.Copy !req
165. I've always felt that
there's far too muchCopy !req
166. hysteria these days
about so-called cheating.Copy !req
167. Yes, a lot of hysteria.Copy !req
168. If you can take advantage
of a situation in some way,Copy !req
169. it's your duty
as an American to do it.Copy !req
170. Why should the race
always be to the swiftCopy !req
171. or the jumble
to the quick-witted?Copy !req
172. Should they win merely because
of the gifts God gave them?Copy !req
173. Well, I say cheating is
the gift man gives himself.Copy !req
174. Mr. Burns, I insist
that we cheat.Copy !req
175. Excellent.Copy !req
176. And to do so,
I propose we travel by...Copy !req
177. horseless sleigh.Copy !req
178. Wow. You sure know
how to cheat, Mr. Burns.Copy !req
179. Yes, well,
I'm older than you.Copy !req
180. You know, Simpson
you're not as objectionableCopy !req
181. as you seemed
when we first met.Copy !req
182. No, sir, I am not.Copy !req
183. Bart?Copy !req
184. Lisa?Copy !req
185. Hello?Copy !req
186. The story of our
national parks begins in 1872.Copy !req
187. Perhaps we should let John Muir
tell the tale.Copy !req
188. Oh, yeah. I remember...Copy !req
189. Excuse me, sir.Copy !req
190. I can't find my children.Copy !req
191. Have you checked the woods?Copy !req
192. No.Copy !req
193. Follow me.Copy !req
194. We'll take
the chair lift.Copy !req
195. It'll give us
an eagle-eye viewCopy !req
196. of the area directly
beneath the chair lift.Copy !req
197. Whoo!Copy !req
198. Well, I won't lie
to you, ma'am.Copy !req
199. Our chances of finding
your childrenCopy !req
200. are slim to nil.Copy !req
201. Hi, Mom.Copy !req
202. There they are!Copy !req
203. Let me down here.Copy !req
204. Sorry. There's no way off
till we get to the top.Copy !req
205. And even then,
it's sort of tricky.Copy !req
206. All right, kids,
we'll meet you at the top!Copy !req
207. Just be careful!Copy !req
208. Uh, actually, I'm a little
more concerned about us.Copy !req
209. Um, do you know
how to weld?Copy !req
210. That worked so well.Copy !req
211. We have several hours
before the others arrive.Copy !req
212. What say we get comfy?Copy !req
213. Now we have electricity.Copy !req
214. This propane tank
will supply us with heat.Copy !req
215. And this doorknob,
properly turned,Copy !req
216. will allow us
access to the cabin.Copy !req
217. No going through
the window for us.Copy !req
218. Is there maple syrup
in this one?Copy !req
219. There isn't any food
in any of these trees.Copy !req
220. Please, Bart,
we've got to hurry.Copy !req
221. I can't be the last one
to reach the cabin.Copy !req
222. Hey, I'm not going
to get fired.Copy !req
223. Is there any gold
in this mountain?Copy !req
224. It doesn't matter.Copy !req
225. I'll check.Copy !req
226. Mr. Smithers!
Mr. Smithers!Copy !req
227. I found another
hurt shrew.Copy !req
228. I think this one
has a twisted ankle.Copy !req
229. Twisted ank...Copy !req
230. Aren't there any
healthy animals in this forest?Copy !req
231. Well, I don't suppose
the others will mind usCopy !req
232. starting the party early,
Homie, old boy.Copy !req
233. More champagne?Copy !req
234. You know, Mr. Burns,Copy !req
235. you're the richest guy
I know.Copy !req
236. Way richer than Lenny.Copy !req
237. Oh, yes, but I'd trade it
all for a little more.Copy !req
238. Oh, these sure are
comfortable chairs.Copy !req
239. Oh, yes, sitting.
The great leveler.Copy !req
240. From the mightiest pharaoh
to the lowliest peasant,Copy !req
241. who doesn't
enjoy a good sit?Copy !req
242. Oh, man,
you are so right.Copy !req
243. Did you ever
sit like this?Copy !req
244. Yes, yes,
that's it.Copy !req
245. Oh, I could go
for one of those right now.Copy !req
246. The only hard part
is getting up.Copy !req
247. Why get up?Copy !req
248. Here's a little move
I've been tinkering with.Copy !req
249. Say I want
that bowl of dip.Copy !req
250. Why, you'd
have to get up.Copy !req
251. Sir, I am in your debt.Copy !req
252. Use it wisely,
my friend.Copy !req
253. Hey, did you
hear something?Copy !req
254. - No.
- Hmm. Did I?Copy !req
255. I don't know.Copy !req
256. Hope that wasn't
an avalanche.Copy !req
257. Be a chum
and take a look-see.Copy !req
258. You got it, buddy.Copy !req
259. Isn't there any way
out of here?Copy !req
260. I don't see one.
Unless...Copy !req
261. No, there's no way out.Copy !req
262. There must be
some wayCopy !req
263. to contact
the outside world.Copy !req
264. Ah, the telegraph.Copy !req
265. S.O.S.Copy !req
266. Avalanche...Copy !req
267. Send...Copy !req
268. Help.Copy !req
269. According to the map,
the cabin should be right here.Copy !req
270. Hey, maybe
there is no cabin.Copy !req
271. Maybe it's one of them
metaphorical things.Copy !req
272. Oh, yeah, yeah...
like maybe the cabinCopy !req
273. is the place
inside each of usCopy !req
274. created by our goodwill
and teamwork.Copy !req
275. Uh, they said
there would be sandwiches.Copy !req
276. Simpson,
I have a confession.Copy !req
277. I'm not quite
the tunnel-diggerCopy !req
278. I made myself out to be.Copy !req
279. You can supervise me.Copy !req
280. All right, good.
Let's dig.Copy !req
281. That's right.
Dig some more.Copy !req
282. Oh, we make quite a duo...
Burns and associate.Copy !req
283. No, no,
what am I thinking?Copy !req
284. Burns and teammate.Copy !req
285. We made it,
old friend.Copy !req
286. We sure did.Copy !req
287. - Huzzah!
- Whoo-hoo!Copy !req
288. What happened?Copy !req
289. I think when we yelledCopy !req
290. we caused
another avalanche.Copy !req
291. We... should... be... carefulCopy !req
292. not... to... speak...Copy !req
293. unless... it's...
absolutely...Copy !req
294. pos-I-tively...Copy !req
295. necessary.Copy !req
296. You're... causingCopy !req
297. more... avalanches.Copy !req
298. I...Copy !req
299. Think...Copy !req
300. They've... stopped.Copy !req
301. Let's go.Copy !req
302. Those last three avalanches
were your fault, Simpson.Copy !req
303. So what?Copy !req
304. Sew buttons.Copy !req
305. There's not another
place for miles.Copy !req
306. This must be the cabin
Burns was talking about.Copy !req
307. Well, we made it
here first.Copy !req
308. All thanks
to teamwork.Copy !req
309. Yeah, my teamwork.Copy !req
310. We must be covered
by a thousand feet of snow.Copy !req
311. It could be days
before they find us.Copy !req
312. Mmm, no books, no radio
no board games.Copy !req
313. A "Bazooka Joe" Comic!Copy !req
314. Ugh, I heard that one
75 years ago!Copy !req
315. We could build
snowmen.Copy !req
316. No, I have
a better idea.Copy !req
317. We could build real men
out of snow.Copy !req
318. Okay...Copy !req
319. Mr. Smithers, Mr. Smithers!
That moose is on fire!Copy !req
320. Fine. Good.
I don't care anymore.Copy !req
321. I'm the last one here.
You kids cost me my job.Copy !req
322. You ain't last,
Mr. Smithers.Copy !req
323. Ah, thank goodness.Copy !req
324. Yeah, Burnsie and Homer
never made it.Copy !req
325. Mr. Burns is still
out there?Copy !req
326. What about our dad?Copy !req
327. Ah, 206 bones,Copy !req
328. 50 miles of
small intestine,Copy !req
329. full pouting lips.Copy !req
330. Why, this fellow
is less a snowmanCopy !req
331. than a god.Copy !req
332. Well, we've managed
to stave offCopy !req
333. cabin fever
for a few hours.Copy !req
334. Eh, I think we should
dress the snowmen.Copy !req
335. Agreed.Copy !req
336. Look at them.Copy !req
337. Smug and secure
in their finery.Copy !req
338. Mocking us.Copy !req
339. Uh, they're just
snowmen, Mr. Burns.Copy !req
340. Ah, snowmen
have peepers.Copy !req
341. Peepers to watch...Copy !req
342. To watch for a moment
of weakness and, baff!Copy !req
343. Comes the knock on the head
and we're down!Copy !req
344. What do we do?Copy !req
345. Oh, wouldn't you
like to know.Copy !req
346. Hey, what is going on here?
Who are you people?Copy !req
347. This is a lookout post.
Where is ranger McFadden?Copy !req
348. I was just happyCopy !req
349. to see so many
nice people.Copy !req
350. Quiet, you drunk.
Where is ranger McFadden?Copy !req
351. Right here, sir.
Right behind the drunk.Copy !req
352. Wait a minute.Copy !req
353. If this is
a ranger stationCopy !req
354. we must be
in the wrong place.Copy !req
355. Well, the only other
cabin is right over...Copy !req
356. There...Copy !req
357. Look at all
these avalanches.Copy !req
358. Do you think they could
have buried the cabin?Copy !req
359. I'll tell you
one thing:Copy !req
360. They didn't come here for
the mountain music festival.Copy !req
361. March 14th to 18th.Copy !req
362. Mom, Dad and Mr. Burns
could be trapped in there.Copy !req
363. I'm trapped with a madman.Copy !req
364. Look at him.
Staring into me.Copy !req
365. Filling my mind
with paranoid thoughts.Copy !req
366. Mmm. Look at his eyes.Copy !req
367. He's trying to hypnotize meCopy !req
368. but not in the good
Las Vegas way.Copy !req
369. I know what he's up to.Copy !req
370. He's thinking of killing meCopy !req
371. then riding my carcass
down the mountain to safety.Copy !req
372. He's truly gone mad
if he's thinking that.Copy !req
373. Well, he can't kill me
if I kill him first.Copy !req
374. I'll kill youCopy !req
375. you bloated museum
of treachery!Copy !req
376. You and what army?Copy !req
377. Stay back.Copy !req
378. I have powers.Copy !req
379. Political powers!Copy !req
380. It's... showtime!Copy !req
381. Gimme!
Let go of that!Copy !req
382. Oh, God...Copy !req
383. Homer!Copy !req
384. Burnsie!Copy !req
385. Okay, search party,
before we set outCopy !req
386. let's take a moment
to humor the children.Copy !req
387. Kids, your father is
going to be just fine.Copy !req
388. Okay, everybody
put on yourCopy !req
389. corpse-handling gloves.Copy !req
390. We've got two
frozen bodiesCopy !req
391. buried somewhere
in this mountain.Copy !req
392. Did you hear that, Lise?Copy !req
393. Dad's going
to be just fine.Copy !req
394. Look! What's that?Copy !req
395. We'll be dashed to pieces!Copy !req
396. Oh, Lord, protect
this rockethouseCopy !req
397. and all who dwell
within the rockethouse.Copy !req
398. It's them, all right.Copy !req
399. We're over here, Homie!Copy !req
400. Oh, something's wrong
with its brakes!Copy !req
401. Gangway!Copy !req
402. Marge, kids.Copy !req
403. Have you people forgotten
our little competition?Copy !req
404. Last one
in the cabin is fired!Copy !req
405. You're fired, Lenny.Copy !req
406. Aw, nuts!Copy !req
407. So, how did we do?Copy !req
408. It's a new record, sir.Copy !req
409. Outstanding.Copy !req
410. Well, perhaps all of this
has been worthwhile.Copy !req
411. Did you all learn
about teamwork?Copy !req
412. Yes.Copy !req
413. Excellent!Copy !req
414. In that caseCopy !req
415. no one will be
fired after all.Copy !req
416. That old goat
can't fire me.Copy !req
417. I'm going to give him
a piece of my mi...Copy !req
418. Aw, nuts!Copy !req
419. Well, Simpson,
I must sayCopy !req
420. once you've been through
something like thatCopy !req
421. with a person you never
want to see that person again.Copy !req
422. You said it,
you weirdo.Copy !req
423. ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.Copy !req