1. {\an8}♪ The Simpsons ♪Copy !req
2. (bell rings)Copy !req
3. (work whistle blows)Copy !req
4. -(sucking)
-(register beeping)Copy !req
5. (jazzy solo)Copy !req
6. (tires screech)Copy !req
7. D'oh.Copy !req
8. -Aah!
-(tires screech)Copy !req
9. {\an8}(playing classical music)Copy !req
10. {\an8}(glass clinking)Copy !req
11. {\an8}My friends,Copy !req
12. {\an8}tonight, we unveil my most
diabolical creation--Copy !req
13. {\an8}Swank.Copy !req
14. {\an8}Ten times more addictive
than marijuana.Copy !req
15. {\an8}ALL:
Ooh!Copy !req
16. {\an8}To human misery.Copy !req
17. {\an8}(rumbling)Copy !req
18. (gasping)Copy !req
19. Huh?Copy !req
20. {\an8}Ice to see you.Copy !req
21. {\an8}McBain!Copy !req
22. {\an8}Ah, McBain.Copy !req
23. {\an8}So glad
you could make it.Copy !req
24. {\an8}Have a salmon puff.Copy !req
25. {\an8}All right.Copy !req
26. {\an8}(groaning loudly)Copy !req
27. {\an8}(evil laughter)Copy !req
28. {\an8}That is one evil dude.Copy !req
29. {\an8}It's just a movie, son.Copy !req
30. {\an8}There's nobody that evil
in real life.Copy !req
31. {\an8}(evil laughter)Copy !req
32. {\an8}-(window cleaner yelling)
-Smithers, where'sCopy !req
33. {\an8}that union representative?
He's 20 minutes late.Copy !req
34. I don't know, sir.
He hasn't been seenCopy !req
35. since he promised
to clean up the union.Copy !req
36. Oh!Copy !req
37. What the hell?Copy !req
38. Well, let's lookCopy !req
39. at the contract
ourselves, eh?Copy !req
40. Benefits, perks,Copy !req
41. a green cookie on
St. Patrick's Day. Ho ho.Copy !req
42. It didn't use
to be this way, Smithers.Copy !req
43. No, it didn't use
to be this way at all.Copy !req
44. Come on, come on,
crack those atoms.Copy !req
45. You, turn out
those pockets.Copy !req
46. Atoms. One, two,
three, fo...Copy !req
47. six of them.Copy !req
48. Take him away.Copy !req
49. You can't treat
the working man this way.Copy !req
50. One day we'll form a union,Copy !req
51. and get the fair and equitable
treatment we deserve.Copy !req
52. Then we'll go too far,
and get corrupt and shiftless,Copy !req
53. and the Japanese
will eat us alive.Copy !req
54. The Japanese?Copy !req
55. Those sandal-wearing
goldfish tenders?Copy !req
56. Ha ha! Bosh. Flimshaw.Copy !req
57. If only we had listened
to that boyCopy !req
58. instead of walling him up
in the abandoned coke oven.Copy !req
59. Well, I am going
to avenge my grandfather.Copy !req
60. We'll take
on that greedy unionCopy !req
61. and we'll get back our...Copy !req
62. dental plan.Copy !req
63. How often do you brush, Ralph?Copy !req
64. Three times a day, sir.Copy !req
65. Why must you turn my office
into a house of lies?Copy !req
66. You're right, I don't brush.Copy !req
67. I don't brush.Copy !req
68. Let's look at a picture book.Copy !req
69. That's enough!
That's enough!Copy !req
70. Dr. Wolfe likes to pull kids'
teeth so he can sell them.Copy !req
71. To who?Copy !req
72. Know that rattle
when you shake up spray paint?Copy !req
73. That's a kid's tooth.Copy !req
74. (whimpering)Copy !req
75. Maggie's teeth are coming
in crooked.Copy !req
76. Has she been sucking
on a pacifier?Copy !req
77. Um, not to my knowledge.Copy !req
78. Liar!Copy !req
79. I'm also afraidCopy !req
80. little Lisa is going
to need braces.Copy !req
81. Oh, no. I'll be
socially unpopular.Copy !req
82. More so.Copy !req
83. Are you sure, doctor?Copy !req
84. Well, judge for yourself.Copy !req
85. Here's Lisa today.Copy !req
86. Without treatment,
here's what she'll look likeCopy !req
87. at age 11...Copy !req
88. age 14...Copy !req
89. age 17...Copy !req
90. and finally, age 18.Copy !req
91. (gasps)Copy !req
92. Cool. She'll be a freak.Copy !req
93. Bart!Copy !req
94. We can stick
her in a trailer,Copy !req
95. drive around the south,Copy !req
96. and charge
two bits a gander.Copy !req
97. ANNOUNCER: Now, stay tuned
for professional wrestlingCopy !req
98. live from the Springfield
Grapplarium.Copy !req
99. Tonight, a Texas Death match--Copy !req
100. Doctor Hillbilly
versus the Iron Yuppie.Copy !req
101. One man will actually be
unmasked and killed in the ring.Copy !req
102. I hope they kill
that Iron Yuppie.Copy !req
103. Thinks he's so big.Copy !req
104. Homer, Lisa needs braces.Copy !req
105. Don't worry.Copy !req
106. We won a dental plan
in the strike of '88.Copy !req
107. That's where I got this scar.Copy !req
108. What do we want?Copy !req
109. ALL: More equitable treatment
in the hands of management!Copy !req
110. When do we want it?Copy !req
111. ALL: Soon!Copy !req
112. Where's my burrito?!Copy !req
113. Where's my burrito?!Copy !req
114. Where's my burrito?!Copy !req
115. Ow!Copy !req
116. Then I got this scar
sneaking under the doorCopy !req
117. of a pay toilet.Copy !req
118. CARL: Welcome brothers
of local 643.Copy !req
119. As you know, our president,
Chucky Fitzhugh,Copy !req
120. ain't been seen lately.Copy !req
121. We're all praying he'll
turn up soon, alive and well.Copy !req
122. (derisive laughter)Copy !req
123. All right, all right,
but seriously...Copy !req
124. we have to vote
on Burns' new contract.Copy !req
125. It's basically the same deal,Copy !req
126. except we get a free keg
of beer for our meetings.Copy !req
127. (cheers)Copy !req
128. And in exchange for that,Copy !req
129. we have to give up
our dental plan.Copy !req
130. So long, dental plan.Copy !req
131. -LENNY: ...dental plan.
-MARGE: Lisa needs braces.Copy !req
132. -...dental plan.
-Lisa needs braces.Copy !req
133. -...dental plan.
-Lisa needs braces.Copy !req
134. -...dental plan.
-Lisa needs braces.Copy !req
135. -...dental plan.
-Lisa needs braces.Copy !req
136. -...dental plan.
-Lisa needs braces.Copy !req
137. Bull's-eye!Copy !req
138. Thanks a lot, Carl.Copy !req
139. Now I've lost
my train of thought.Copy !req
140. LENNY: ...dental plan.Copy !req
141. MARGE: Lisa needs braces.Copy !req
142. ...dental plan.Copy !req
143. Lisa needs braces.Copy !req
144. If we give up
our dental plan...Copy !req
145. I'll have to pay
for Lisa's braces!Copy !req
146. People, stop! We can't
give up our dental plan.Copy !req
147. Lenny, without
that dental plan,Copy !req
148. you wouldn't have that
diamond in your tooth.Copy !req
149. Yoink!Copy !req
150. Hey!Copy !req
151. And Gummy Joe.Copy !req
152. Where would you be
without that dental plan?Copy !req
153. {\an8}(Walter Brennan voice)
I wouldn't have old chomper hereCopy !req
154. {\an8}that's for sure.Copy !req
155. You know what I think
of this contract? This!Copy !req
156. (growling, straining)Copy !req
157. Who is that firebrand,
Smithers?Copy !req
158. That's Homer Simpson, sir.Copy !req
159. Simpson, eh? New man?Copy !req
160. Actually sir, he thwarted
your campaign for governor.Copy !req
161. You ran over his son.Copy !req
162. He saved the plant
from meltdown.Copy !req
163. His wife painted you
in the nude.Copy !req
164. Uh, doesn't ring a bell.Copy !req
165. (chanting)
Homer! Homer! Homer!Copy !req
166. I move that Homer Simpson
be our new union president.Copy !req
167. All in favor?Copy !req
168. ALL: Aye!Copy !req
169. All opposed?Copy !req
170. MAN (with nebbish
voice): Nay.Copy !req
171. Congratulations, Homer.Copy !req
172. (cheering)Copy !req
173. Hey, what does this job pay?Copy !req
174. Nothing.Copy !req
175. -D'oh!
-Unless you're crooked.Copy !req
176. Whoo-hoo!!Copy !req
177. President of the union!
I'm so proud of you, Homie.Copy !req
178. This is your chance
to get a fair shakeCopy !req
179. for the working man.Copy !req
180. And make lifelong connections
to the world of organized crime.Copy !req
181. Mmm, organized crime.Copy !req
182. Don Homer, I have baked
a special doughnutCopy !req
183. just for you.Copy !req
184. Mmm.Copy !req
185. Grazie.Copy !req
186. Don Homer, my son, he has
trouble with the, uh...Copy !req
187. Eh-eh-eh-eh-eh...Copy !req
188. Molto bene.Copy !req
189. That's-a nice-a doughnut.Copy !req
190. Do you think you can get
the dental plan back?Copy !req
191. Well, that depends on
who's a better negotiator--Copy !req
192. Mr. Burns or me.Copy !req
193. Dad, I'll trade you
this delicious doorstopCopy !req
194. for your crummy
old Danish.Copy !req
195. Done, and done.Copy !req
196. (chuckling)Copy !req
197. D'oh!Copy !req
198. Lisa and Marge,Copy !req
199. these braces
are invisible, painless,Copy !req
200. and periodically release
a delightful burstCopy !req
201. of Calvin Klein's
Obsession for teeth.Copy !req
202. (sniffs)Copy !req
203. Mmm!Copy !req
204. Doctor, we don't have
a dental plan right nowCopy !req
205. so we'll need something
a little more... affordable.Copy !req
206. These predate stainless steel,
so you can't get them wet.Copy !req
207. (coughs)Copy !req
208. He's a worthy foe.Copy !req
209. Look at him, Smithers--
Exercising awayCopy !req
210. while the others are off
at the candy machine.Copy !req
211. (grunting)Copy !req
212. Hey, Lenny, can you getCopy !req
213. this Sugar Daddy
off my back?Copy !req
214. Okay, but it's
the last time.Copy !req
215. We don't have
to be adversaries, Homer.Copy !req
216. We both want
a fair union contract.Copy !req
217. HOMER: Why is Mr. Burns
being so nice to me?Copy !req
218. And if you scratch my back,
I'll scratch yours.Copy !req
219. {\an8}Wait a minute.
Is he coming on to me?Copy !req
220. I mean, if I should slip
something into your pocket,Copy !req
221. what's the harm?Copy !req
222. Oh, my God.Copy !req
223. He is coming on to me.Copy !req
224. After all, negotiations
make strange bedfellows.Copy !req
225. (snickers)Copy !req
226. (clicks tongue)Copy !req
227. Ahh!Copy !req
228. Sorry, Mr. Burns,Copy !req
229. but I don't go in for these
backdoor shenanigans.Copy !req
230. Sure, I'm flattered,
maybe even a little curious,Copy !req
231. but the answer is no.Copy !req
232. (sighs)Copy !req
233. Lisa, so you won't be scared,Copy !req
234. I'll show you some
of the tools I'll be using.Copy !req
235. This is the scraper,Copy !req
236. this is the poker,Copy !req
237. and this happy little fellow
is the gouger.Copy !req
238. Uh-huh.Copy !req
239. Now, the first thing
I'll be doingCopy !req
240. is chiseling some teeth
out of your jawbone.Copy !req
241. Hold still while I gas you.Copy !req
242. ('60s music playing)Copy !req
243. (cockney accent)
Look, fellas.Copy !req
244. It's Lisa in the sky.Copy !req
245. No diamonds, though.Copy !req
246. Look out for the campy drawing
of Queen Victoria!Copy !req
247. All: Oh, no!Copy !req
248. For the love of God,
help us!Copy !req
249. -Help us!
-Help us!Copy !req
250. The mirror.Copy !req
251. The mirror!Copy !req
252. (evil cackling)Copy !req
253. Honey, you look fine.Copy !req
254. (barking)Copy !req
255. (yelping)Copy !req
256. (doorbell rings)Copy !req
257. Who is it?Copy !req
258. MAN: Goons.Copy !req
259. HOMER: Who?Copy !req
260. Hired goons.Copy !req
261. Hired goons?Copy !req
262. (sinister laughing)Copy !req
263. Ah, Homer. I hope Crusher
and Low Blow didn't hurt you.Copy !req
264. You know, you could
have just called me.Copy !req
265. Oh, yes, but the telephone
is so impersonal.Copy !req
266. I prefer the hands-on touchCopy !req
267. you only get
with hired goons.Copy !req
268. Hired goons?Copy !req
269. This is the largest TV
in the free world.Copy !req
270. Aiee! Un gato malodoro!Copy !req
271. (shivering groan)Copy !req
272. This is a thousand monkeysCopy !req
273. working at a
thousand typewriters.Copy !req
274. Soon, they'll have writtenCopy !req
275. the greatest novel
known to man. Let's see.Copy !req
276. "It was the best of times,
it was the blurst of times!"Copy !req
277. -You stupid monkey!
-(chattering)Copy !req
278. Oh, shut up.Copy !req
279. (footsteps trudging)Copy !req
280. And this
is my basement.Copy !req
281. Gee, it's not as nice
as the other rooms.Copy !req
282. Yes, I really should stopCopy !req
283. ending the tour
with it.Copy !req
284. Now, let's get down
to business.Copy !req
285. HOMER: Oh, man,Copy !req
286. I really have to go
to the bathroom.Copy !req
287. Why did I have all that beer
and coffee and watermelon?Copy !req
288. Now, Homer, I know
what you're thinking,Copy !req
289. and I want to take
the pressure off.Copy !req
290. It doesn't take a whiz to seeCopy !req
291. that you're looking out
for number one.Copy !req
292. Well, listen to me
and you'll makeCopy !req
293. a big splash very soon.Copy !req
294. Which way to the bathroom?Copy !req
295. Oh, it's the 23rd door
on the left.Copy !req
296. Nope.Copy !req
297. Nope.Copy !req
298. Nope.Copy !req
299. Ah, he wouldn't even
hear me out.Copy !req
300. (grunting)Copy !req
301. Find the bathroom
all right?Copy !req
302. Uh... yeah.Copy !req
303. Well, you've won
this round, Simpson.Copy !req
304. But I'll grind you
into the earth like a bug.Copy !req
305. (maniacal laughing)Copy !req
306. (screaming)Copy !req
307. {\an8}Simpson, be a dear
and rub my legsCopy !req
308. {\an8}till the feeling
comes back.Copy !req
309. A bug, I tell you!Copy !req
310. A bug!Copy !req
311. (maniacal laughter)Copy !req
312. (groans)Copy !req
313. (sighs)
I'm going to resign.Copy !req
314. I don't know why they made
me union presidentCopy !req
315. in the first place.Copy !req
316. Because they love you
down at the plant.Copy !req
317. Yeah, you're right.Copy !req
318. Guys are always patting
my bald head for luck,Copy !req
319. pinching my belly to
hear my girlish laugh.Copy !req
320. Hmm. That doesn't sound like
they like you at all.Copy !req
321. You know,
I think you're right.Copy !req
322. First thing tomorrow morning,Copy !req
323. I'm going to punch Lenny
in the back of the head.Copy !req
324. Hmm. (grunts)Copy !req
325. Batten down those cowlicks.Copy !req
326. Straighten that part.Copy !req
327. Uncross those eyes,
mister.Copy !req
328. But I can't!Copy !req
329. Oh, sorry, Quigley.Copy !req
330. Come on, honey, smile.Copy !req
331. I bet you've got
a beautiful smile.Copy !req
332. Why don't you share it
with the world?Copy !req
333. (gasping)
There is no God!Copy !req
334. Fellow workers,
I've been meetingCopy !req
335. with Mr. Burns day and night
and I've had enough.Copy !req
336. (chanting)
Strike! Strike! Strike! Strike!Copy !req
337. All in favor of a strike?Copy !req
338. ALL: Aye!Copy !req
339. All opposed?Copy !req
340. MAN (with nebbish
voice): Nay.Copy !req
341. Who keeps saying that?Copy !req
342. (nebbish voice)
It was him.Copy !req
343. Let's get him,
fellas.Copy !req
344. (angry muttering)Copy !req
345. (chuckling)Copy !req
346. (guitar strumming softly)Copy !req
347. ♪ Come gather 'round,
children ♪Copy !req
348. ♪ It's high time ye learns ♪Copy !req
349. ♪ 'Bout a hero named Homer ♪Copy !req
350. ♪ And a devil named Burns ♪Copy !req
351. ♪ We'll march till we drop ♪Copy !req
352. ♪ The girls and the fellas ♪Copy !req
353. ♪ We'll fight till the death ♪Copy !req
354. ♪ Or else fold like
umbrellas... ♪Copy !req
355. (shouting and grunting)Copy !req
356. Ah, this is the life.Copy !req
357. Smithers, get me
some strikebreakers.Copy !req
358. The kind they had
in the '30s.Copy !req
359. We can't bust heads
like we used to.Copy !req
360. But we have our ways.Copy !req
361. (murmuring in agreement)Copy !req
362. One trick is to tell
them storiesCopy !req
363. that don't go anywhere.Copy !req
364. Like the time I caught
the ferry over to Shelbyville.Copy !req
365. I needed a new heel
for my shoe,Copy !req
366. so I decided to go
to Morganville,Copy !req
367. which is what they called
Shelbyville in those days.Copy !req
368. So I tied an onion to my belt,Copy !req
369. which was the style
at the time.Copy !req
370. Now, to take the ferry
costs a nickel,Copy !req
371. and in those days,Copy !req
372. nickels had pictures
of bumblebees on them.Copy !req
373. "Give me five bees
for a quarter," you'd say.Copy !req
374. Now, where were we?Copy !req
375. Oh, yeah.
The important thing wasCopy !req
376. that I had
an onion on my belt,Copy !req
377. which was the style
at the time.Copy !req
378. They didn't have
white onionsCopy !req
379. because of the war.Copy !req
380. The only thing
you could getCopy !req
381. was those big,
yellow ones.Copy !req
382. (shouting angrily)Copy !req
383. Full power, Smithers.Copy !req
384. (screaming)Copy !req
385. ♪ So we'll march
day and night ♪Copy !req
386. ♪ By the big cooling tower ♪Copy !req
387. ♪ They have the plant ♪Copy !req
388. ♪ But we have the power ♪Copy !req
389. Now do "Classical Gas".Copy !req
390. (playing "Classical Gas")Copy !req
391. Ooh, look at him strutting around
like he's cock of the walk.Copy !req
392. Well, let me tell you.Copy !req
393. Homer Simpson
is cock of nothing.Copy !req
394. Hmm?Copy !req
395. Why, you and I can run
this plant ourselves.Copy !req
396. (upbeat music playing)Copy !req
397. ROBOTS: Crush, kill, destroy.Copy !req
398. Tonight on Smartline:Copy !req
399. "The Power Plant Strike--
Argle-bargle or Foofooraw?"Copy !req
400. With us tonightCopy !req
401. are plant owner
C.M. Burns,Copy !req
402. union kingpin
Homer Simpson,Copy !req
403. and talk show mainstay
Dr. Joyce brothers.Copy !req
404. I brought my own mic.Copy !req
405. Yes, well...Copy !req
406. Homer, organized labor has been
called a lumbering dinosaur.Copy !req
407. (screams)Copy !req
408. Uh, my director's telling meCopy !req
409. not to talk to you anymore.Copy !req
410. -Whoo-hoo!
-Uh, Mr. Burns,Copy !req
411. you mentioned you wanted
an opening tirade?Copy !req
412. Yes, thank you, Kent.Copy !req
413. 15 minutes from now,Copy !req
414. I will wreak a terrible
vengeance on this city.Copy !req
415. No one will be spared!Copy !req
416. No one!Copy !req
417. (chuckles)
A chilling vision of things to come.Copy !req
418. Oh, for God's sake.Copy !req
419. (whines)Copy !req
420. Good-bye, Springfield.Copy !req
421. From hell's heart,
I stab at thee.Copy !req
422. (plant powering down)Copy !req
423. ♪ So we'll march
day and night ♪Copy !req
424. ♪ By the big cooling tower ♪Copy !req
425. ♪ They have the plant ♪Copy !req
426. ♪ But we have the power ♪Copy !req
427. ♪ So we'll march
day and night ♪Copy !req
428. ♪ By the big cooling tower ♪Copy !req
429. ♪ They have the plant,
but we have the power ♪Copy !req
430. Look at them allCopy !req
431. through the darkness
I'm bringing.Copy !req
432. They're not sad at all.
They're actually singing.Copy !req
433. They sing without juicers.Copy !req
434. They sing without blenders.Copy !req
435. They sing without flunjers,
capdabblers, and smendlers.Copy !req
436. Dooh...Copy !req
437. Tell Simpson
I'm ready to deal.Copy !req
438. All right, Homer.Copy !req
439. You can have the dental planCopy !req
440. on one condition.Copy !req
441. You must resign
as head of the union.Copy !req
442. Whoo-hoo!Copy !req
443. (hooting loudly)Copy !req
444. Smithers, I'm beginning
to think that Homer SimpsonCopy !req
445. was not the brilliant
tactician I thought he was.Copy !req
446. (hooting)Copy !req
447. We're going back to work.Copy !req
448. STRIKERS: Yay!Copy !req
449. (plant powering up)Copy !req
450. {\an8}(sultry music plays)Copy !req
451. (splurting)Copy !req
452. All: Yay!Copy !req
453. Oh, honey, you can hardly
see your new braces.Copy !req
454. And that's the tooth.Copy !req
455. Oops.
I left the gas on.Copy !req
456. (laughing continues)Copy !req
457. ♪♪Copy !req
458. Shh.Copy !req
459. {\an8}CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY
ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.Copy !req