1. Aah!
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2. Ooh!
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3. Froggie, I'm home!
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4. Hi, little fella.
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5. I got some nice
juicy flies for you.
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6. Jeez, Louise.
Look at this mess.
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7. I told that boy a billion times
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8. to pick up his jun...
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9. I like to play with you.
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10. - My back.
- I like to play with you.
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11. - There goes my back again.
- I like to play with you.
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12. I like to play with you.
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13. - I like to play with you.
- D'
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14. - I like to play with you.
- Go get help, boy.
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15. I like to play with you.
I like to play with you.
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16. I like to play with you.
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17. I like to play with you.
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18. Maggie.
My poor back.
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19. I like to play with you.
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20. I like to p... I like to play...
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21. Dad!
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22. Homer, what happened?
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23. The boy.
Bring me the boy.
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24. Bart, if you had
cleaned up your room
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25. when I asked you to,
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26. your father's trick back
would still be aligned.
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27. So, you'll pick up
this mess right now.
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28. Clumsy Homer.
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29. Everything's always my fault.
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30. If he'd just watch out
where he was going.
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31. Hello.
What have we here?
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32. A cherry bomb.
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33. I thought I blew
all you guys up.
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34. People, people, no rough-housing
on the monkey bars.
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35. You there.
Tuck in your shirt.
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36. Watch it. I saw that.
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37. You certainly have done
awfully well for yourself, Spanky.
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38. Mother, please don't call me Spanky
on school grounds.
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39. Wow! A cherry bomb!
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40. What are you gonna
do with it, Bart?
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41. Watch out, Bart. It's Skinner!
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42. Good morning,
Mr. Skinner.
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43. Morning, boys.
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44. Why haven't you introduced me
to any of your students, Spanky?
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45. - Well?
- Mother, I would like you to meet
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46. Milhouse, Lewis, Richard
and Bart Simpson.
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47. This is the Bart Simpson
you're always talking about?
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48. But he looks so sweet.
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49. - I am, Ma'am.
- Simpson!
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50. Let's move on now,
Mother, shall we?
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51. Bye, Spanky.
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52. So, you're gonna flush it?
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53. What can I say?
I've got a weakness for the classics.
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54. I think I need to make a stop
at the little girls' room.
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55. Okay, Mother. This way.
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56. So long, sucker.
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57. Now hold it right there,
you little...
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58. - Spanky?
- Mother?
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59. Marge, I still hurt.
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60. Marge. Marge!
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61. Homer.
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62. How many times do I
have to fluff your pillow?
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63. Actually, I was wondering
if you could make me
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64. a grilled cheese sandwich.
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65. Well, okay.
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66. Make sure it's squished flat
and crunchy on the outside.
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67. I know how you like 'em, Homer.
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68. And maybe some of those
little wieners that come in a can?
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69. And some fruit cocktail
in heavy syrup.
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70. Marge.
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71. Marge.
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72. Marge, get the door!
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73. Principal Skinner!
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74. Hello, Mrs. Simpson.
I'm afraid there's been
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75. a very disturbing incident
at school today.
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76. I'm outta here, man.
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77. Homer, Principal Skinner is here.
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78. Hello, Principal Skinner.
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79. I'd get up, but the boy
crippled me.
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80. I understand completely.
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81. The disturbing incident I was referring to
happened this morning
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82. when your son flushed
an explosive device
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83. down the boys' lavatory.
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84. - That ol' gag.
- Unfortunately, at the same moment,
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85. my mother was in the girls' lavatory
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86. making use of the facilities.
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87. - Dear.
- Mr. and Mrs. Simpson,
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88. we have transcended incorrigible.
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89. I don't think suspension
or expulsion will do the trick.
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90. I think it behooves us all
to consider... deportation.
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91. Deportation?
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92. You mean kick Bart
out of the country?
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93. Hear him out, Marge.
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94. Well, perhaps I was being a tad glib.
Let me explain.
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95. Our elementary school
participates in
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96. a foreign exchange program.
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97. Normally, a student
is selected on
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98. the basis of academic
excellence or intelligence,
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99. but in Bart's case,
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100. I'm prepared to make
a big exception.
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101. And if you're willing
to play along,
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102. he can spend
the next three months
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103. studying far, far away.
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104. Sounds great. Although,
a kid can't learn much
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105. in just three months.
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106. Homer, you didn't even ask
where Bart would be going.
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107. Actually, he'd be staying
in France,
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108. in a lovely chateau
in the heart of the wine country.
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109. But Bart doesn't speak French.
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110. When he's totally immersed
in a foreign language,
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111. the average child
can become fluent in weeks.
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112. Yeah, but what about Bart?
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113. I'm sure he'll pick up
enough to get by.
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114. And, the whole thing
won't cost you a dime,
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115. as long as you're willing to
take in a student of your own.
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116. Wait a minute, Skinner.
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117. How do we know
some principal over in France
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118. isn't pulling
the same scam you are?
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119. Well, for one thing,
you wouldn't be getting a French boy.
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120. You'd be getting an Albanian.
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121. - You mean all white with pink eyes?
- No. No, no, no.
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122. A student from Albania.
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123. It's a country on the Adriatic Sea.
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124. Well, going to France sounds like
a fantastic opportunity,
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125. but I think Bart
should have a say in this.
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126. The life of a frog.
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127. That's the life for me.
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128. Bart, how would you like
to spend
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129. the next three months
living in France?
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130. France? Wow!
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131. He makes me crazy
12 months a year.
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132. At least you get the summer off.
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133. And I get to take a plane
there, wouldn't I, Mom?
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134. Yes, Bart.
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135. Wow! And one back?
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136. Well, Bart seems
very enthusiastic about the idea.
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137. - Yes, baby!
- Way to go!
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138. Bon voyage, boy.
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139. Good-bye, my special...
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140. My special little guy.
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141. You will write us, won't you?
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142. - All the time.
- What do you know about France?
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143. I know I'm going,
and you're not.
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144. I'm gonna miss you, son.
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145. And listen, while you're seeing
all those great sights,
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146. always remember that
you're representing your country.
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147. I guess what I'm saying is,
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148. don't mess up France
the way you messed up your room.
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149. Okay, Dad.
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150. Is one of you going to be
on the charter flight?
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151. - Yes, sir.
- Come along.
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152. - Bye. Be good.
- We'll miss you.
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153. Hey, man, watch it.
Ooh!
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154. Hey, man.
It's me, Bart Simpson.
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155. - Okay, kid. Let's go.
- Hey!
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156. Ooh la la!
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157. How much longer, sir?
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158. This is where we're going, right?
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159. Chateau Mah-son.
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160. Eww. What a dump.
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161. You know, in Albania,
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162. the unit of currency
is called the lek.
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163. You gotta be kiddin'. The lek.
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164. And the national flag
is a two-headed eagle on a red field.
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165. Give me the old
stars and stripes.
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166. And the main export is furious
political thought.
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167. Political what?
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168. Trans Albanian Airlines, flight number two,
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169. Tirana to Springfield,
is now arriving.
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170. Welcome to your new home.
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171. Escape is impossible.
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172. My name is Cesar.
This is my nephew, Ugolin.
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173. You may find life here
at the chateau hard,
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174. but if you shut up and do
exactly what we say,
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175. the time will pass more quickly.
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176. - He's right, you know.
- Well, okay, sir.
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177. - Adil?
- Mother?
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178. Well, I guess
for the next few months,
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179. yes, I will be your mother.
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180. And this must be
Lisa and Maggie.
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181. And you must be
my new father, Homer.
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182. Affectionate
little Albanian, isn't he?
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183. Hey, come on, guys.
Quit being so grabby.
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184. Sorry, man. Be my guest.
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185. You may find
his accent peculiar.
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186. Certain aspects of his culture
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187. may seem absurd,
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188. perhaps even offensive.
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189. But I urge you all
to give little Adil
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190. the benefit of the doubt.
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191. In this way,
and only in this way,
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192. can we hope to better understand
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193. our backward neighbors
throughout the world.
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194. Thank you, Principal Skinner.
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195. Thank you, fellow students.
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196. Although I have only been in
your country a few days,
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197. I have already found Americans
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198. to be most... trusting.
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199. Although, officially,
I am required to hate you,
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200. I want you to know
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201. I do not feel it in my heart.
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202. Hurry up, boy.
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203. My grapes are waiting
for their water.
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204. How can you defend a country
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205. where 5% of the people
control 95% of the wealth?
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206. I'm defending a country
where people can think,
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207. and act and worship
any way they want.
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208. - Can not. Can not.
- Can too. Can too!
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209. Please, please, kids.
Stop fighting.
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210. Maybe Lisa's right about America
being a land of opportunity,
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211. and maybe Adil has a point
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212. about the machinery
of capitalism
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213. being oiled with the blood
of the workers.
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214. Your father is right.
We should not fight.
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215. Friends?
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216. Well, okay.
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217. Well, now that that's settled,
I'll just clear the dishes.
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218. No, no, Mrs. Simpson.
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219. You have been oppressed
enough for today.
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220. - I will clear the dishes.
Okay.
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221. Did you see that?
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222. You know, Marge, this is the way
I've always wanted it to be.
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223. We've become a fully functioning
family unit.
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224. We've always blamed ourselves,
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225. but I guess it's pretty clear
which cylinder wasn't firing.
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226. - Homer!
- Your paper-thin commitment to your children
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227. sends shivers down my spine.
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228. - May I be excused?
- Lisa!
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229. She's just jealous.
She'll get over it.
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230. And if she doesn't, we can
always exchange her.
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231. - Homer!
- Just kidding.
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232. Can I have something
to go with my turnip?
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233. Quiet!
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234. When you work like a man,
we will feed you like one.
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235. Now go to sleep!
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236. Hey, hey, come on.
Move it, pal.
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237. You leave Maurice alone.
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238. The floor is
good enough for you.
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239. You go to sleep there.
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240. Nice and cozy, Adil?
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241. Yes. Thank you, Father.
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242. Look, Adil, you can call me Dad.
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243. All right, Dad.
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244. Aw!
You called me Dad.
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245. Dad, do you think
I could come visit you
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246. at the nuclear power plant?
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247. - You wanna see where I work?
- Yes, very much.
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248. None of my biological kids
ever wanted to see me at work.
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249. - Then I can go?
- Well, I'll have to pull a few strings
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250. with the boys in security,
but sure, you bet.
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251. Excellent.
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252. Now watch me.
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253. You grab the grape
between your thumb and forefinger,
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254. and gently twist it off
and drop it in the bucket.
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255. Now you do it.
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256. Very good. Now do it
a million times.
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257. See these?
American doughnuts.
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258. Glazed, powdered
and raspberry-filled.
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259. Now how's that for
freedom of choice?
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260. Dad, do you think
I might see your
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261. plutonium isolation module?
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262. Maybe.
Hold on a second.
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263. Hey, Lenny.
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264. Does this place have one
of those plutonium isolation deals?
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265. - Yeah, over in sector 12.
- Sector 12?
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266. Third floor,
by the candy machines.
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267. That sector 12.
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268. Come along, Adil.
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269. Ungrateful swine!
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270. We give you food,
we give you shelter,
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271. and this is how you repay us!
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272. You little shutterbug.
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273. Cheese!
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274. Cheese!
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275. Wait a minute.
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276. Stupid grapes.
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277. Bunch of creeps!
I hate France!
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278. You sure have
taken a shine to little Adil.
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279. Well, he sure makes life
a lot easier around here.
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280. You have to admit that.
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281. Well, okay, I will,
if you admit you love Bart.
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282. Okay. Okay.
I love Bart.
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283. - Well?
- What?
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284. Well?
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285. Adil's a very sweet boy.
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286. Darn tootin'.
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287. "Dear Bart, How is France?
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288. "I don't know why
you haven't written.
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289. I guess you're just
having too much fun."
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290. - Yeah, right.
- Silence!
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291. "Everyone here
in the United States is fine.
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292. "We think Maggie may say
her first word any day now.
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293. "Lisa got an 'A' in math,
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294. "which I'm only mentioning as news.
I'm not putting you down.
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295. "And your father, well...
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296. "last night, he went to sleep
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297. talking about how much
he loves you."
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298. "Remember to dress warm,
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299. "and try to be as helpful
as you can
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300. "to your adopted parents.
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301. All my love. Mom."
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302. What are you doing?
Get out of here!
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303. Sorry.
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304. On second thought, Bart.
Bart, come here.
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305. - Drink this.
- No, thanks.
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306. Do not worry.
This is France.
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307. It is customary
for children to take
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308. a little wine now and then.
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309. Yeah, but it's got
antifreeze in there.
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310. Drink it!
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311. Ooh!
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312. Bart.
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313. No.
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314. You're a policeman, aren't you?
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315. Excusez-moi.
Je ne parle pas Anglais.
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316. But you gotta help me.
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317. These two guys I'm staying with,
they work me day and night.
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318. They don't feed me.
They make me sleep on the...
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319. I... I don't want
a piece of candy.
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320. I need your...
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321. Come on, Mister.
Can you help me?
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322. Forget it.
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323. I'm so stupid.
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324. Anybody could have learned
this dumb language by now.
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325. Here I've listened to nothing
but French for the past...
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326. Honey, I'm home.
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327. Hello, Homer.
What's that?
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328. Just some blueprints
Adil wanted.
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329. I'm telling you,
he's such a curious little dickens.
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330. I bet he could build
a nuclear power plant if he wanted to.
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331. All right, Sparrow.
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332. We know you're in there.
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333. We'll give you one minute
to surrender.
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334. My!
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335. Ooh, trouble
in the neighborhood.
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336. Let's check it out.
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337. I'm his neighbor.
What did he do?
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338. Well, sir, we...
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339. Well, sir, we've
been on the trail
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340. of a spy transmitting
highly confidential information
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341. - to an unfriendly nation.
- Ooh!
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342. Through the use
of radio triangulation,
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343. we tracked him
to exactly this point.
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344. Wow.
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345. - That's all I can tell you.
- Aw.
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346. All right. Well, the name of
his country starts with the letter "A."
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347. - Ooh!
- Time's up, Sparrow.
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348. We're coming in after you.
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349. Gee whiz. Adil would get
a kick out of seeing this.
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350. - Adil?
- The Sparrow!
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351. Adil.
There you are.
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352. Get him!
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353. Au revoir, suckers.
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354. So, he's going to prison?
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355. No. We've arranged
an exchange
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356. for one of our own men
caught in Albania.
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357. So, Sparrow, we meet again.
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358. Yes.
Sometimes I think
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359. I am getting
too old for this game.
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360. Okay, kids.
Let's hurry it up.
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361. Good-bye, Simpsons.
Thank you for your hospitality.
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362. I hope this experience
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363. will not sour you on
the student exchange program.
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364. - Good-bye, Adil.
- Have a nice trip.
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365. Good-bye, Adil.
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366. I'll send you those
civil defense plans you wanted.
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367. Air France, flight dix-neuf
cent quatre-vingts huit,
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368. Paris to Springfield
is now arriving.
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369. Look, Mom.
There he is!
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370. Bart, my baby boy.
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371. - Welcome home.
- Hey, where's the big guy?
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372. He means me.
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373. - Hey, boy.
- Hey, Homer.
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374. He brought us gifts.
His first unselfish act.
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375. So, basically, I met
one nice French person.
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376. Bart, I have something to say
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377. that's gonna bother me
if I don't say it.
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378. - It's good to see you.
- Same here.
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379. I'd love a glass of that wine
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380. Bart brought us.
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381. Sorry, Marge. Some wise guy
stuck a cork in the bottle.
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382. You hear that, Marge?
My boy speaks French.
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383. Shh!
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