1. The Simpsons.Copy !req
2. Is this the kind of airCopy !req
3. we want to leave for our children?Copy !req
4. Don't they deserve better?Copy !req
5. Electricity,
the fuel of the future.Copy !req
6. Test-drive the Elec-Taurus todayCopy !req
7. and get a free gift.Copy !req
8. My children deserve to see meCopy !req
9. get a free gift.Copy !req
10. I'm proud of you, Dad.Copy !req
11. Buying an electric car
will help clean the air upCopy !req
12. and protect the earth's supply...Copy !req
13. You're faking this
to get the gift, aren't you?Copy !req
14. But I like the nice things
you said about me.Copy !req
15. Thinking of saying good-bye to gas?Copy !req
16. You betcha.Copy !req
17. Bart!Copy !req
18. Well, that shut me up.Copy !req
19. Hello. I, uh, love your planet deeplyCopy !req
20. and I'm interested in purchasingCopy !req
21. one of your electronic autos.Copy !req
22. Well, it's always nice to meet peopleCopy !req
23. concerned about the environment.Copy !req
24. What kind of mint?Copy !req
25. Boy, that quiet engineCopy !req
26. sure makes conversation a lot easier.Copy !req
27. Yeah, it's got
a lot of other problems, too.Copy !req
28. Uh, Dad, you're headed for the harbor!Copy !req
29. Relax. We're in an electric car.Copy !req
30. See, everything's fine.Copy !req
31. Dolphins.Copy !req
32. Oopsie.Copy !req
33. Hi, girls.Copy !req
34. Saltwater seems to be good for it.Copy !req
35. Um, I'm sorry,Copy !req
36. the car does not meet my eco-concern.Copy !req
37. Can I have my prize now?Copy !req
38. Certainly.Copy !req
39. What the...Copy !req
40. Help! Help! It burns!Copy !req
41. Hey, we never opened that envelopeCopy !req
42. to see what our gift is.Copy !req
43. We didn't?Copy !req
44. That's odd.Copy !req
45. Seems like we would have done thatCopy !req
46. right after we left the car place.Copy !req
47. I know, but we didn't.Copy !req
48. Well, here it is.Copy !req
49. So we can open it and find out now.Copy !req
50. Perfect.Copy !req
51. Aw, movie tickets?Copy !req
52. It hardly seems worth destroying a car.Copy !req
53. They're passes to a test screeningCopy !req
54. of a new movie starring...Copy !req
55. Mel Gibson.Copy !req
56. Who else is in it?Copy !req
57. Who cares? Mel Gibson.Copy !req
58. Mel Gibson is just a guy, Marge.Copy !req
59. No different than me or Lenny.Copy !req
60. Were you or Lenny ever named
sexiest man alive?Copy !req
61. Hmm, I'm not certain about Lenny.Copy !req
62. Besides, it's not just
his chiseled good looks.Copy !req
63. People magazine says
he's a devoted father,Copy !req
64. goes to church every week,Copy !req
65. and likes to fix things around the...Copy !req
66. - Homer, let's make love.
- Uh, okay.Copy !req
67. Uh, you're thinking about me, right?Copy !req
68. Of course, Homie.Copy !req
69. Aren't you thinking about me?Copy !req
70. Well, I will now!Copy !req
71. Easy, easy, there, buster.Copy !req
72. But how did they know?Copy !req
73. I had a mouse.Copy !req
74. Thank you.Copy !req
75. Good evening.Copy !req
76. I'm Edward Christian,Copy !req
77. Assistant VP of finance and distributionCopy !req
78. at Polystar Pictures.Copy !req
79. Dang, I should have brought the camera.Copy !req
80. Also with me tonight are the dynamic duo,Copy !req
81. William Milo and Robin HannahCopy !req
82. who green-lighted all
of Shaquille O'Neal's movies,Copy !req
83. including Kazaam!Copy !req
84. How's the popcorn, guys?Copy !req
85. - Needs salt!
- Needs salt!Copy !req
86. Anyhoo, welcome to our test screeningCopy !req
87. of Mel Gibson's directorial
follow-up to Braveheart,Copy !req
88. a remake of the Jimmy Stewart classic,Copy !req
89. Mr. Smith Goes To Washington.Copy !req
90. I knew I shouldn't have passed on that.Copy !req
91. Now, after the film,Copy !req
92. I'll be handing out these cards
for your opinion.Copy !req
93. We then take your cardsCopy !req
94. to Hollywood, California.Copy !req
95. And change the movie
based on your suggestions.Copy !req
96. Any, uh, questions?Copy !req
97. Yes. Over here and thank you.Copy !req
98. Hi. Will there beCopy !req
99. any Flubber in this movie?Copy !req
100. Uh-hi. Glayvin.Copy !req
101. No, I'm afraid not.Copy !req
102. Ah, for cryin' out, Glayvin!Copy !req
103. Is Mel Gibson here?Copy !req
104. No, sorry, but like all celebrities,Copy !req
105. he's in Hollywood attending
benefits for various diseases.Copy !req
106. Did they like it?Copy !req
107. Well, they haven't seen it yet, Mel.Copy !req
108. How'd you get here from LA so fast?Copy !req
109. John Travolta flew me in his jet.Copy !req
110. Now I have to help him move next weekend.Copy !req
111. He deliberately waitedCopy !req
112. till we were in the air to ask me.Copy !req
113. You know, you really didn't have
to make this trip, Mel.Copy !req
114. The screening is going to go fine.
Believe me.Copy !req
115. I don't know. I think this movie
was a big mistake.Copy !req
116. All I do is talk for two hours.Copy !req
117. I don't shoot anybody.
What was I thinking?Copy !req
118. You shouldn't worry about the movie.Copy !req
119. William and I both think it's fabulous.Copy !req
120. And I think we know a little somethingCopy !req
121. about the movie business.Copy !req
122. Oh, Robin. You've got to seeCopy !req
123. the director's cut of Booty Call.Copy !req
124. It's fabulous.Copy !req
125. What, even better than the original?Copy !req
126. 'Cause that was pretty fabulous, too.Copy !req
127. And he fought for them once.Copy !req
128. For the only reason any man ever doesCopy !req
129. because of one plain, simple rule:Copy !req
130. Love thy neighbor.Copy !req
131. Boring.Copy !req
132. It's not boring.Copy !req
133. He's passionate about government.Copy !req
134. Pft. At least the Jimmy Stewart versionCopy !req
135. had that giant rabbit
who ran the savings and loan.Copy !req
136. Excellent.Copy !req
137. That man knows how to filibuster.Copy !req
138. Well, that was a stinker.Copy !req
139. I liked it.Copy !req
140. It was nice to see a movieCopy !req
141. where people
solve their problems with wordsCopy !req
142. instead of bullets and chasing.Copy !req
143. Oh, you're just saying thatCopy !req
144. because your boyfriend was in it.Copy !req
145. I'll bet you would have hated itCopy !req
146. if me and Lenny were Mr. Smith.Copy !req
147. Will you stop acting so jealous!Copy !req
148. Listen, I don't want
to get spotted by the crowd,Copy !req
149. so I'm going to take
a leak behind the dumpster.Copy !req
150. Look! It's Mel Gibson.Copy !req
151. Hey, everybody rush over there.Copy !req
152. Hi, Mel. Hi.Copy !req
153. Hi, Mel, Mel.Copy !req
154. Hi, everybody.Copy !req
155. Hi, Mr. Gibson.Copy !req
156. Thanks for coming, folks.Copy !req
157. And don't be afraid
to be completely truthfulCopy !req
158. when you fill out your opinion cards.Copy !req
159. Honesty is the foundation
of the movie business.Copy !req
160. Oh, we'll be honest.Copy !req
161. We could never lie to you, Mel.Copy !req
162. Um, will you be readingCopy !req
163. the cards yourself, Mel?Copy !req
164. Well, I'll be reading yours personally.Copy !req
165. That's it. I'm telling
Mr. Stupidest man aliveCopy !req
166. what I really thought of his movie.Copy !req
167. - Hey, Gibson!
- Uh, yes, sir.Copy !req
168. - Got a pencil?
- There you go.Copy !req
169. Thanks.Copy !req
170. You waste my time
in front of this stupid...Copy !req
171. Appreciate it.Copy !req
172. The movie tested through the roof, Mel.Copy !req
173. The sea captain gave it "Four Arrrrs."Copy !req
174. Bumblebee man says, "Muy bueno."Copy !req
175. And we were worried about
the Latino market, huh?Copy !req
176. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
177. Worried.Copy !req
178. Come on, they can't all have loved it.Copy !req
179. "Loved it."Loved it."Loved it."Copy !req
180. "Loved it despite absence
of Flubber, Glayvin"?Copy !req
181. Oh, here we go. "Your movieCopy !req
182. was more boring than church.Copy !req
183. All you did was yak, yak, yak.Copy !req
184. You didn't even shoot anybody."
Damn, I knew it!Copy !req
185. Oh, don't do this to yourself, Mel.Copy !req
186. The guy's obviously a nut.Copy !req
187. Maybe. Or maybe he's the only personCopy !req
188. with the guts to tell me the truth.Copy !req
189. Turn the plane around.Copy !req
190. I want to go to 742 Evergreen Terrace.Copy !req
191. But you promised to help me move.Copy !req
192. Oh, geez!Copy !req
193. Door, Marge.Copy !req
194. I'm looking for... Homer Simpson.Copy !req
195. And I've been looking for you, too, pal.Copy !req
196. Pound him, Dad.Copy !req
197. Bart, don't.Copy !req
198. Quiet. Dad's going to get
his butt kicked by Mel Gibson.Copy !req
199. Knock his teeth out, Homer!Copy !req
200. Listen, Gibson, I'm tired
of Hollywood pretty boysCopy !req
201. like you and Jack ValentiCopy !req
202. thinking you can have any woman you want.Copy !req
203. You see this?Copy !req
204. It symbolizes that she's my propertyCopy !req
205. and I own her.Copy !req
206. Mr. Simpson, I need your help.Copy !req
207. I think you're right about my movie,Copy !req
208. and I want you to help me make it better.Copy !req
209. Really? You want my help?Copy !req
210. Marge, did you hear that?Copy !req
211. Mel Gibson wants my help.Copy !req
212. Mel Gibson.Copy !req
213. But, Dad, I thought you hated...Copy !req
214. Shut up.Copy !req
215. Homer doesn't know anything
about making movies.Copy !req
216. Don't sell your husband
short, Mrs. Simpson.Copy !req
217. She's always doing that, Mel.Copy !req
218. - Oh...
- Homer is a brutally honest man.Copy !req
219. Completely tactless and insensitive.Copy !req
220. Guilty as charged.Copy !req
221. The problem I have isCopy !req
222. people love me so much,
they never criticize me.Copy !req
223. I speed all the time,
but cops never give me a ticket.Copy !req
224. If I don't pay my taxes,Copy !req
225. the IRS pays them for me.Copy !req
226. Oh, you poor thing.Copy !req
227. It's hell being Mel.Copy !req
228. Come on. Geez.Copy !req
229. I don't have much time, Homer.Copy !req
230. Will you come to Hollywood with me?Copy !req
231. You had me at "hello."Copy !req
232. I didn't say "hello."Copy !req
233. Hollywood, here we come!Copy !req
234. Hollywood, here we are!Copy !req
235. Stop doing that, Mom.Copy !req
236. A mini-van.Copy !req
237. Oh, boy, you celebrities
sure know how to live.Copy !req
238. What is this, Toyota Previa?Copy !req
239. Dodge Caravan.Copy !req
240. Sweet.Copy !req
241. Look, they're making a movie!Copy !req
242. Robert Downey Jr. Is shooting it outCopy !req
243. with the police.Copy !req
244. I don't see any cameras.Copy !req
245. Okay, while Mel and I are working,Copy !req
246. why don't you guys do the town?Copy !req
247. I hear all the stars eat at a placeCopy !req
248. called Planet Hollywood.Copy !req
249. Can I stay with you, Dad?Copy !req
250. Sorry, son, but we're going
to be very busy.Copy !req
251. Mel's movie really stinks.Copy !req
252. Okay, this opening sceneCopy !req
253. should be in fast motion.Copy !req
254. Everybody likes that
'cause it looks funny.Copy !req
255. Mr. Smith is coming to Washington.Copy !req
256. He's really honest, that could be bad news
for us corrupt politicians.Copy !req
257. - Well, if he is, big deal.
- How do you figure?Copy !req
258. If he doesn't play ball, we'll teach him
a thing or two if you know what I mean.Copy !req
259. - Bye-bye.
- See ya.Copy !req
260. Look at that.Copy !req
261. I don't think so.Copy !req
262. Okay, here you need a musical montageCopy !req
263. where you try on lots of funny hats.Copy !req
264. It'll let us see your playful side.Copy !req
265. - No. Just no.
- Yeah, but...Copy !req
266. Uh, for those of you
who have always wanted to seeCopy !req
267. the famous Brown Derby restaurant...Copy !req
268. that's where it used to be.Copy !req
269. And on your left,Copy !req
270. is the notorious spot where Hugh Grant...Copy !req
271. - Hugh?
- ... filmed the movie.Copy !req
272. Nine Months.Copy !req
273. You want me to replace
the villain with a dog?Copy !req
274. I mean, nobody will know what's going on.Copy !req
275. They will if you set up
that the dog is evil.Copy !req
276. All you have to do
is show him doing this...Copy !req
277. And people will suspect the dog.Copy !req
278. Maybe this wasn't a good idea, Homer.Copy !req
279. I'm sorry I dragged you out here.Copy !req
280. Let me pay your bus fare home.Copy !req
281. Uh-uh-uh, now, here'sCopy !req
282. your biggest problem of all.Copy !req
283. The filibuster scene?Copy !req
284. That was Jimmy Stewart's favorite.Copy !req
285. And it was fine for the 1930s.Copy !req
286. The country was doing great back then.Copy !req
287. Everyone was into talking.Copy !req
288. But now, in whatever year this is,Copy !req
289. the audience wants action,Copy !req
290. and seats with beverage holders,Copy !req
291. but mainly action.Copy !req
292. You really think the end is boring?Copy !req
293. Oh, Mel, it's the most
boring piece of garbageCopy !req
294. I've ever seen.Copy !req
295. And it's not easy for me to say that.Copy !req
296. Hmm, I guess it's a little flat.Copy !req
297. Okay, let's reshoot the ending.Copy !req
298. I'll call the hair and makeup ladies,Copy !req
299. you see if the teamsters
will work for free.Copy !req
300. Piece of cake.Copy !req
301. Now, where's that kid with my latte?Copy !req
302. According to the map,Copy !req
303. this house is ownedCopy !req
304. by the dog from Frasier.Copy !req
305. And that's where Ellen Degeneres
and Anne Heche live.Copy !req
306. - We're lesbians!
- We're lesbians!Copy !req
307. Okay, uh, this new ending...Copy !req
308. that we shot last night...Copy !req
309. is a little different than what we had,Copy !req
310. but I think you'll like it.Copy !req
311. It's missing some sound effects,Copy !req
312. and the computer guys haven't added
the twinkle in my eye.Copy !req
313. Mel, you're coming off desperate.Copy !req
314. Roll it, Louie!Copy !req
315. Here comes two.Copy !req
316. Well, I'm not licked.Copy !req
317. And I'm going to stay right hereCopy !req
318. and fight for this lost cause.Copy !req
319. Somebody will listen to me.Copy !req
320. Somebody will...Copy !req
321. I believe the senator
has yielded the floor.Copy !req
322. Yield this, Senator Payne.Copy !req
323. I move we impose some serious term limits.Copy !req
324. I second that motion...Copy !req
325. with a vengeance.Copy !req
326. All in favor, say "die."Copy !req
327. Mr. Smith, this is highly unorthodox.Copy !req
328. I'm the President of the United StatesCopy !req
329. and I demand to know what's going on here.Copy !req
330. Happy birthday, Mr. President.Copy !req
331. Pretty cool, huh?Copy !req
332. You, uh, you chopped offCopy !req
333. the president's head.Copy !req
334. Bet you didn't see that coming.Copy !req
335. You impaled a United States SenatorCopy !req
336. with the American flag.Copy !req
337. Why did Mr. Smith kill everybody?Copy !req
338. It was symbolism.Copy !req
339. He was mad.Copy !req
340. But this was going to be
the studio's prestige pictureCopy !req
341. like Howard's End or Sophie's Choice.Copy !req
342. Eww, those movies sucked.Copy !req
343. I only saw them
to get Marge into the sack.Copy !req
344. Mission accomplished.Copy !req
345. But we've already bought
five Golden Globe Awards.Copy !req
346. I don't make movies to win awards,Copy !req
347. especially now that I have two Oscars.Copy !req
348. I make movies for guys like him.Copy !req
349. - Yeah, guys like me.
- Who are you anyway?Copy !req
350. Do the words "executive producer"Copy !req
351. mean anything to you?Copy !req
352. - Executive producer?
- We'll talk.Copy !req
353. You've desecrated a classic film.Copy !req
354. This is worse than Godfather III.Copy !req
355. Whoa. Whoa, hey, whoa,Copy !req
356. let's not say things we can't take back.Copy !req
357. All right, all right, I'm sorry,Copy !req
358. but this filmCopy !req
359. is never going to see the light of day.Copy !req
360. Look, they're towing away a range rover.Copy !req
361. - There's no...
- Yoink! Come on, Homer.Copy !req
362. We got a movie to premiere.Copy !req
363. - Woo-hoo!
- We've got to get that film backCopy !req
364. or we'll all be fired.
You know what I mean?Copy !req
365. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fired.Copy !req
366. - Give us the film!
- Never.Copy !req
367. And on your left,Copy !req
368. you'll see Rainier WolfcastleCopy !req
369. filming his latest movie,
Saving Irene Ryan.Copy !req
370. You put me down, you big lummox!Copy !req
371. Jed!Copy !req
372. Shut up, old lady,
and stop kicking me there.Copy !req
373. Watch out! Coming through!Copy !req
374. Move!Copy !req
375. Homer! Land mine!Copy !req
376. I'm on it.Copy !req
377. Good night, Mr. Gibson.Copy !req
378. Night, Gus.Copy !req
379. Oh, I'm getting too old for this crap.Copy !req
380. How old are you anyway?Copy !req
381. Well, I've been told I can play
anywhere from 28 to...Copy !req
382. Sorry I asked.Copy !req
383. Aw, crap, here they come.Copy !req
384. Well, that's it, Homer.Copy !req
385. We should have known better
than to match witsCopy !req
386. with studio executives.Copy !req
387. Hey, come on, turn that
down-under frown upside down.Copy !req
388. We're not finished yet.Copy !req
389. Wow, these dummies look pretty good.Copy !req
390. Well, I've had a lot of surgery, old chum.Copy !req
391. Shh. Mr. Limato said he'd fire usCopy !req
392. if you didn't stop bothering
the customers.Copy !req
393. Homer, what are you doing here?Copy !req
394. No time talk. Need steal car.Copy !req
395. Must save powerful,
but controversial movie.Copy !req
396. Hello.Copy !req
397. Quick, Mel, get in.Copy !req
398. Forget it, Homer.Copy !req
399. Let's just give them the stupid movie.Copy !req
400. Movies aren't stupid.Copy !req
401. They fill us with romance and hatredCopy !req
402. and revenge fantasies.Copy !req
403. Lethal Weapon showed us
that suicide is funny.Copy !req
404. That really wasn't my intention.Copy !req
405. Before Lethal Weapon 2, I never thoughtCopy !req
406. there could be a bomb in my toilet.Copy !req
407. But now I check every time.Copy !req
408. It's true. He does.Copy !req
409. Movies mean that much to you, Homer?Copy !req
410. They're my only escapeCopy !req
411. from the drudgery of work and family.Copy !req
412. - No offense.
- Oh, what the heck.Copy !req
413. Let's hit the road.Copy !req
414. Shove over, junior.Copy !req
415. That thoughtless destructionCopy !req
416. will surely bankrupt the museum, old chum.Copy !req
417. Shut up.Copy !req
418. Mom, you got to take
my picture in this carCopy !req
419. so I can show Milhouse.Copy !req
420. Oh, sorry, honey.Copy !req
421. I used up the last roll on that manCopy !req
422. I thought was Judge Judy.Copy !req
423. Well, I think we lost them.Copy !req
424. Oh, wait. There they are.Copy !req
425. Let me try something.
Take the wheel, Lisa.Copy !req
426. - But my dad can...
- I said you.Copy !req
427. We've got them now.Copy !req
428. Oh, no! We killed Mel Gibson!Copy !req
429. You all saw it.Copy !req
430. He came at me with a knife, right?Copy !req
431. Wait a minute. He's just a dummy.Copy !req
432. I know, but he sells tickets.Copy !req
433. Let's go.Copy !req
434. Oh, great idea, Mel.Copy !req
435. Now it's my turn.Copy !req
436. - What are you doing?
- I'm tired of running away.Copy !req
437. Did Braveheart run away?Copy !req
438. Did Payback run away?Copy !req
439. It's time we showed those suitsCopy !req
440. what we're made of.Copy !req
441. The heck is that?Copy !req
442. Well, the one on the left is Mel Gibson.Copy !req
443. I don't know who the other two guys are.Copy !req
444. Will you please tell me
the rest of the plan?Copy !req
445. It's your plan from Braveheart.Copy !req
446. Your army mooned the enemyCopy !req
447. until they could take no moreCopy !req
448. and surrendered.Copy !req
449. No. They didn't. They attacked usCopy !req
450. in a horribly bloody battle, remember?Copy !req
451. Actually, I didn't see it,
but on the poster...Copy !req
452. Jump!Copy !req
453. Homer, are you okay?Copy !req
454. I think so.Copy !req
455. No.Copy !req
456. All in favor, say, "die."Copy !req
457. Ooh, that digital soundCopy !req
458. really lets you hear the blood splatter.Copy !req
459. I don't get it, Mel.Copy !req
460. How can you be so calm and cool?Copy !req
461. My stomach's full of vomiting butterflies.Copy !req
462. Okay, that's it.Copy !req
463. Let's get ready to meet our public.Copy !req
464. Oh, well, that was disgusting.Copy !req
465. Worst ending ever.Copy !req
466. I think I'm going to be sick.Copy !req
467. I'm Jimmy Stewart's granddaughter,Copy !req
468. and you'll be hearing from my attorney.Copy !req
469. Oh, we should have put in the dogCopy !req
470. with the shifty eyes.Copy !req
471. I'm sorry I ruined your career, Mel.Copy !req
472. It's not your fault, Homer.Copy !req
473. I guess there's just no roomCopy !req
474. in today's crazy, gentle AmericaCopy !req
475. for violent dinosaurs like us.Copy !req
476. How did the country lose its way, Mel?Copy !req
477. When did we stop rootingCopy !req
478. for the man with the flame throwerCopy !req
479. or an acid-spraying gun of some kind?Copy !req
480. I blame the internet
and the return of swing music.Copy !req
481. Well, whatever it is,Copy !req
482. we got to get rolling on our next picture.Copy !req
483. Hey, what about a prequel or something?Copy !req
484. Everybody loves prequels.Copy !req
485. I don't.Copy !req
486. Okay, Mr. Difficult.Copy !req
487. How about a teen sex rompCopy !req
488. where you and your buddiesCopy !req
489. are always trying to get some?Copy !req
490. No, wait. A ghost who wins the lottery!Copy !req
491. You could be the ghost
or the lottery commissioner.Copy !req
492. Ooh! What about Indiana Jones?Copy !req
493. Does anyone own the rights to that?Copy !req
494. Hey, Mel, I fell out!Copy !req
495. Captioned by
Visual Data Media ServicesCopy !req