1. Ghostbusters.
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2. There's something strange in the
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3. neighborhood, who you gonna call?
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4. Ghostbusters.
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5. There's something weird and it don't look good, who you gonna call?
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6. Ghostbusters.
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7. I ain't afraid of no ghost.
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8. The real Ghostbusters will return
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9. after these messages.
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10. We now return to the real Ghostbusters.
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11. Money for nothing, I like the sound of
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12. that.
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13. Not nothing Winston, we've been hired
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14. as consultants on a horror film.
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15. Same difference Egon, just lean back
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16. and tell other folks what to do.
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17. Pete Bankman is ready for his fans.
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18. What fans?
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19. You're not in the movie, Peter.
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20. Well, not yet, Ray.
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21. But this face just begs to be on the
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22. screen.
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23. Well, you guys can have the money and
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24. the fame.
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25. It's enough for me to see the inside of
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26. the MJN Studios.
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27. Sorry to disappoint you, amigo, the
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28. director wanted authenticity.
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29. So they're filming the whole shebang at a
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30. real haunted house.
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31. Give me a break, not even a ghost
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32. would live in this dump.
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33. Not so fast, Peter, I'm getting some
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34. disturbing readings.
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35. Brother, consultants leave their toys
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36. at home, Egon.
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37. Cut, you call that a ghost?
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38. You wouldn't scare a baby.
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39. Movies sure don't make ghosts like
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40. they used to.
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41. I'm Feeny Musselberg, director of this
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42. chaos.
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43. What the?
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44. And this is Gil Hamstrung, our star.
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45. Howdy.
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46. Now listen, Gil, you gotta put more o
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47. omph into it.
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48. Remember, babe, you're a ghost.
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49. I'm a ghost, I'm a ghost.
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50. What's it saying, Joe?
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51. Same old stuff, ghosts losing the end.
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52. Yeah, it just makes me homicidal.
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53. But what could we do about it?
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54. I know, I'll write a protest.
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55. Yeah, and send it where, Dimbo, the
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56. dead letter office?
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57. Hey, I got a better idea, Catherine.
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58. Stop, you vile apparition.
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59. Yeah, I always talk like that.
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60. Needs work, suggestions?
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61. Get a writer.
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62. Yeah, they're overrated.
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63. What are you sitting around for, time
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64. is money.
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65. Artie Grendel, our producer, the
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66. Ghostbusters.
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67. Pleased to meet you, you're fired.
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68. Did I miss something?
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69. We're cutting unnecessary expenses,
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70. beginning with you.
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71. No, no, no, the lines.
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72. That's more.
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73. Now, let's show them what a real ghost
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74. can do.
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75. Hey, those ones look good.
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76. Too good, come on.
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77. How's the sound level, dude?
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78. Ghost, it ain't hard, Roy.
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79. This is terrific, we gotta get it on
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80. film, come here.
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81. Hurry.
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82. Let's go, to the car.
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83. I suspected something like this might
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84. happen.
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85. Most modern films set ghosts howling.
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86. Oh dear, my, goodness gracious, my.
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87. Now, this is more like it.
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88. That's great, only could you maybe say
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89. , you'll pay ghost hunter.
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90. You'll pay ghost hunter?
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91. You're a natural, I'm telling you.
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92. Time for one ghost roast, care of the
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93. ghost busters.
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94. Hold it, these spooks are tops.
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95. Couldn't you loan them out to me, just
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96. till the pitch is done?
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97. Sorry, we don't lease, we bust.
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98. Well, this set is clean.
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99. All right, busters, hey, okay.
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100. Yeah, four consultants who get down
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101. and boogie.
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102. So what do you gotta say, Grendel?
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103. I guess I was a little hasty, good
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104. work guys.
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105. But where are my manners?
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106. Take them out for some chow, Feeny, on me.
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107. Now, let's talk turkey.
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108. I just don't get it.
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109. It's been a month since we got fired from
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110. that picture.
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111. Why come to the premiere?
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112. Grendel thought it'd be good publicity
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113. if we showed up in full regalia.
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114. So the pond scum thinks, what's in it
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115. for us?
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116. He makes good on the rubber check he
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117. wrote us.
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118. Now that's an argument I can live with.
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119. Hey look, the picture's just getting
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120. out.
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121. What'd you think of it?
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122. Disgusting.
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123. Horrible.
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124. Sickening.
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125. We loved it.
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126. Hey, long time no see.
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127. Bet this makes you guys happy, huh?
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128. Happy?
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129. That rat, Grendel, fired us the day
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130. after you were on the set.
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131. How could he have made a movie so fast
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132. without a director or star?
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133. You can't, even with them.
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134. Special effects alone should have taken
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135. more than a month.
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136. There you are, you're late.
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137. Seems there's a little mystery here.
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138. A little matter of instant movie.
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139. My secret, real hush, hush, but since
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140. it's sort of thanks to you.
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141. See you in the movies, boys.
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142. MJ in Studios, I can't believe it, we
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143. 're actually going inside.
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144. You know, for years I've dreamed of
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145. this moment?
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146. Rey, if you dreamed of this moment,
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147. why didn't you warn us?
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148. Gentlemen.
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149. Make my secret.
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150. They're perfect stars, no makeup, no
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151. special effects, and they work for free.
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152. They agreed to make the pictures I want
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153. if I help them make the one they want.
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154. Like to hear the title?
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155. It's called The End of the
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156. Ghostbusters.
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157. The real Ghostbusters will return
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158. after these messages.
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159. We now return to the real Ghostbusters.
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160. I never knew these old movie sets were
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161. so solid.
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162. Douglas Flynn was imprisoned here in
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163. The Pirate of Zinda.
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164. We're standing in the very same cell.
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165. It's a singular treat, Rey.
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166. Tell me, in the movie, did he manage to
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167. escape?
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168. Sure, it only took him 14 years.
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169. Sorry to intrude, boys, but you're
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170. wanted on the set.
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171. After you, Egon.
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172. At this given moment, I have absolutely
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173. no urge to break into the movies.
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174. No problem.
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175. These Hollywood types are all phony.
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176. Show them who's boss and they fold.
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177. Just watch Mama Venkman's little boy.
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178. Have we got a bone to pick with you?
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179. First, I really must complain about that
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180. dressing room.
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181. Perhaps must is too strong, might or can
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182. 't.
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183. You wouldn't consider giving those
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184. back to us, would you?
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185. I'll take that as a negative.
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186. Just what's the story here?
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187. Simplicity itself.
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188. We give yous a head start, count to five,
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189. chase you and blast you.
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190. Will this make a great movie, I ask
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191. you?
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192. Oh, I can see the ads now.
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193. You'll believe a ghost buster can fry.
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194. Roll 'em.
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195. I'd say that's our cue to get out of
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196. here.
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197. One, two.
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198. So I'm impatient.
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199. Let's get him.
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200. Egon, remind me, what happens if one
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201. of those beams hits us?
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202. Our individual atoms go on separate
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203. vacations.
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204. Fantastic.
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205. In here, these old jails always had a
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206. back door.
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207. With rare exceptions.
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208. Just a show of nice guys, we'll let
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209. you draw first.
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210. With what?
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211. Just kidding.
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212. Come on.
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213. I wonder if they got any vacancies.
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214. You're a million laughs, Peter.
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215. Can we wrap this up soon?
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216. Film costs money.
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217. Of course, quality comes first.
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218. I think we lost him.
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219. I wonder what this is supposed to be a
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220. model of.
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221. Steamship Lusitania.
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222. Had to ask.
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223. I've always wanted to do that.
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224. This way.
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225. Or maybe not.
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226. Hey, this is the wall where Clark
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227. Tracy got it in Gangsters on Broadway.
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228. And unless somebody has a brainstorm,
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229. where we're gonna get it now.
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230. See you in the movies, guys.
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231. Feeny.
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232. We figured Grendel was up to no good,
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233. so we followed yous.
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234. Only this place was locked up tight, so
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235. we barred this baby from a friend.
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236. But how's Hamstrung know how to fly it?
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237. He's an actor, ain't he?
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238. I'm a pilot, I'm a pilot, I'm a.
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239. Uh-oh, ghosts at 12 o'clock.
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240. He's burning.
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241. Whoa.
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242. Yo.
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243. Yeah.
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244. Burn rubber.
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245. Hey, we're short by two.
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246. Give up and we'll let your pals go.
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247. If we give up, do you solemnly promise
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248. to release them and not hurt anyone?
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249. We do.
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250. Follow my lead.
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251. Now you're part of the bargain, let
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252. them go.
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253. Okay, Ray, what's your plan?
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254. I got them to promise.
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255. That's it?
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256. That ain't no plan, that's a character
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257. defect.
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258. I believe we've made a tactical error.
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259. All the union will hear about this.
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260. How, on a Ouija board?
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261. You, you, producer?
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262. Here are your marks, let's try and get
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263. it in one take.
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264. I think we'll have to.
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265. Egon, bend this way, I think I can
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266. reach your PKE meter.
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267. What good's that gonna do?
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268. We know we got ghosts here.
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269. If I can just reverse the polarity,
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270. it'll send signals to ghosts instead of
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271. receiving them.
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272. I hate to break this to you, Ray, but
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273. I really think what we need now is more
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274. ghosts.
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275. Ready.
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276. SOS, SOS.
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277. Aim.
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278. Fight.
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279. Yee-haw.
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280. Tally ho.
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281. Yee-haw.
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282. Yee-haw, yee-haw, yee-haw, yee-haw, y
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283. ee-haw, yee-haw, yee-haw, yee-haw, yee-haw.
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284. It's the ghosts of the studio's old
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285. movie stars.
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286. Swift move, Ray.
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287. Only how do you know they won't side with
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288. the ghosts?
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289. Because they're heroes.
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290. Yee-haw.
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291. Hey, this isn't in the script.
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292. I don't, I just, no.
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293. Keep calm, the situation's well in
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294. hand.
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295. I wouldn't bet on that, Funky.
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296. Two arms, comrades.
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297. Catch.
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298. We're back in business.
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299. Let us go, you traitors.
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300. Whoa.
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301. What a bummer.
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302. Time to ad lib a hasty departure.
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303. How about the rest of them?
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304. You don't zap the good guys.
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305. Come on, let's get it.
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306. Let's get it.
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307. There he goes. >> He's getting away.
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308. Listen, we can cut a deal, I know a
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309. great restaurant, let's do lunch.
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310. Save it for the parole board, pal.
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311. Looks like our job's done here, until
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312. next time, buckaroos.
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313. If only all ghosts were like that.
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314. The real Ghostbusters will return
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315. after these messages.
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316. We now return to the real Ghostbusters.
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317. Dig.
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