1. - Cute and cuddly, boys.Copy !req
2. - Um, Skipper?
Salt, please.Copy !req
3. - Here you go, Pri—Copy !req
4. Vate.Copy !req
5. - Thank you, Skipper.Copy !req
6. Uh, so, Kowalski,Copy !req
7. have you discovered
any science... things?Copy !req
8. Kowalski?
- Hmm?Copy !req
9. - Science?
Any new discoveries?Copy !req
10. - Oh, um...Copy !req
11. well, yes.Copy !req
12. I've been experimenting
with transdimensional—Copy !req
13. Transdim—Copy !req
14. Tran—Copy !req
15. Oh, come on!Copy !req
16. Enough already!Copy !req
17. - I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.Copy !req
18. But you can't rush
smoked salmon puffs.Copy !req
19. They burn if you so much
as look at them the wrong way.Copy !req
20. - The food isn't the problem,
Roger.Copy !req
21. - That is the problem.Copy !req
22. We're eating
in a stinking sewer.Copy !req
23. - I know.
I know.Copy !req
24. Flushing does not a greatCopy !req
25. dinner party make, right?Copy !req
26. So I'll put on some show tunes.Copy !req
27. Yeah, yeah, something bold
and brassy,Copy !req
28. a real 11 o'clock number.Copy !req
29. - Reptile, the sounds
of the sewerCopy !req
30. are the least of our problem.Copy !req
31. Oh!Copy !req
32. - I'm sorry, guys.Copy !req
33. I've lived down here so long,
I barely notice the smell.Copy !req
34. - Really?Copy !req
35. How do you get used to—Copy !req
36. - You can't!
You can't get used to that!Copy !req
37. What, are you insane?Copy !req
38. I hate my home.Copy !req
39. - So why not leave?Copy !req
40. - Many of your kind live
quite comfortablyCopy !req
41. in the South Florida area
known as Gator Alley.Copy !req
42. Oh!
I just got that.Copy !req
43. Alli-gator?
Gator—Copy !req
44. - Yeah, we get it, Kowalski.Copy !req
45. Operation See Ya Later, Gator,
is a go.Copy !req
46. We'll need a large crate,
10 million Deutschmarks,Copy !req
47. and a C-17 cargo jet
on the runway in 15 minutes.Copy !req
48. - I might need 30 minutes
on the jet.Copy !req
49. - Blast it, man!Copy !req
50. That could jeopardize
the whole mission.Copy !req
51. - Whoa!
Guys, I'm not moving.Copy !req
52. Times Square, the Met,
Broadway?Copy !req
53. I mean, come on.
Broadway?Copy !req
54. You can't ask me to give up
on my dreamCopy !req
55. of singing
at the Great White Way.Copy !req
56. No, I would rather liveCopy !req
57. in the worst sewer
in the Big AppleCopy !req
58. than in the best swamp
in all of Florida.Copy !req
59. - I hear you, brother.Copy !req
60. It's not the heat;
it's the humidity.Copy !req
61. - Uh, okay.Copy !req
62. - So I'll just stay put...Copy !req
63. down here...
in this sewer...Copy !req
64. on the banks
of this raging river of filth.Copy !req
65. - Oh, dear.Copy !req
66. You can always move
to the zoo, Roger.Copy !req
67. - I could?Copy !req
68. - Negatory.Copy !req
69. Our zoo overlords
may be somewhatCopy !req
70. slow on the uptake...Copy !req
71. - But even they would noticeCopy !req
72. the sudden appearanceCopy !req
73. of an 800-pound alligator.Copy !req
74. - Despair not, Roger.Copy !req
75. Compared to our usual
high-stakes tango,Copy !req
76. your little problem
is but a petty pirouette.Copy !req
77. - Oh, okay.Copy !req
78. Which means what?Copy !req
79. I don't know.Copy !req
80. - We'll find you a new home
right hereCopy !req
81. in the City That Never Sleeps.Copy !req
82. - Fresh air, sunshine,
and a pondCopy !req
83. to replicate your native
marshy environments.Copy !req
84. - Sold!
Done!Copy !req
85. And we pirouette.Copy !req
86. - What do you think, Roger?Copy !req
87. - It's—it's nice.
It's nice.Copy !req
88. I got one question.Copy !req
89. Why the log?Copy !req
90. It's not very—
uh, what's the word?Copy !req
91. Uh, comfortable.Copy !req
92. - Well, with the park's
predominantly human population,Copy !req
93. you'll need camouflage.Copy !req
94. - Just hold still
when people are around.Copy !req
95. Otherwise, they're likely to—Copy !req
96. Alligator!Copy !req
97. Get the police!
Help!Copy !req
98. - No, no, I'm not gonna—Copy !req
99. - Help!Copy !req
100. - And finally,
from the wackadoo file,Copy !req
101. Esther A. Paxton
of Paramus claimsCopy !req
102. to have seen an actual alligator
in Central Park.Copy !req
103. But when Animal Control
investigated,Copy !req
104. all they found was this log.Copy !req
105. Sounds like they were barkingCopy !req
106. up the wrong tree, Chuck.Copy !req
107. - Ha! You're out on a limb
there, Bonnie.Copy !req
108. Ha!Copy !req
109. - Okay, I grant you,
there were issuesCopy !req
110. with our previous
home proposal.Copy !req
111. - But this one's brilliant.Copy !req
112. - Are you really positiveCopy !req
113. they're not gonna
find me here?Copy !req
114. - Not if you hold still
this time.Copy !req
115. - From 10:00 a.m.
to 5:45 p.m.Copy !req
116. Monday through Friday,
8:00 p.m. on weekends.Copy !req
117. - Uh-oh, Skipper.
Museum's open.Copy !req
118. - Duck and cover, men.Copy !req
119. And, Roger, hold still.Copy !req
120. - Who wants to see
some dead things?Copy !req
121. - Gator.
Cool.Copy !req
122. - What, that?Copy !req
123. It's totally fake-looking.Copy !req
124. Check out his dumb
rubber nose.Copy !req
125. - Ow!Copy !req
126. Why would you do that?Copy !req
127. - Fear gripped the Museum
of Natural History todayCopy !req
128. as witnesses claim
they were attackedCopy !req
129. by the alligator exhibit.Copy !req
130. - We was just standing there,
you know,Copy !req
131. not doing nothing wrong.Copy !req
132. And then the alligator
comes aliveCopy !req
133. and tried to eat
my cousin, Vic.Copy !req
134. - Curiously,
museum officials sayCopy !req
135. there is no alligator exhibit.Copy !req
136. - Hmm, curious indeed, Chuck.Copy !req
137. - Okay, the pond
and the museum scenariosCopy !req
138. suffered from unplanned
variables.Copy !req
139. Lessons learned.Copy !req
140. - But this one's a winner.Copy !req
141. - All right, let me get—
I'm supposed to be what, now?Copy !req
142. - A gargoyle,Copy !req
143. stone carved
into a mythological creatureCopy !req
144. that wards off evil spirits.Copy !req
145. - The thing is, guys, um,Copy !req
146. I'm not really good
with heights.Copy !req
147. - Well, gee, Roger,Copy !req
148. what are you "real good" with?Copy !req
149. Not camouflage.
Not holding still.Copy !req
150. We're running out of options
here.Copy !req
151. - Just don't look down.
You'll be fine.Copy !req
152. - Don't look down.
Don't look down.Copy !req
153. Don't look...Copy !req
154. Dooooooooown!Copy !req
155. - Roger!Copy !req
156. - Ooh, lucky for himCopy !req
157. there was a swimming pool
down there.Copy !req
158. - A rather public pool.Copy !req
159. - This is Gator Watch,Copy !req
160. New York's number one
in alligator attack updates.Copy !req
161. - Breaking now:Copy !req
162. Manhattan's most wanted reptileCopy !req
163. has literally dropped
into Midtown.Copy !req
164. - Animal Control has placed
the gator threat levelCopy !req
165. at severe.Copy !req
166. - Citizens are warned
to not approachCopy !req
167. any prehistoric
killing machinesCopy !req
168. they may encounter
between 82nd and Canal Street.Copy !req
169. - Stay with us
for Team Predator coverageCopy !req
170. and Gail Force
with Gator Watch Weather.Copy !req
171. - I'm a fugitive.Copy !req
172. I'm a fugitive from justice.Copy !req
173. - Don't panic.Copy !req
174. We just need to find
a safe house,Copy !req
175. lay low until Danny Dogcatcher
loses our scent.Copy !req
176. Ah, this should do it.Copy !req
177. Kowalski,
can you crack the lock?Copy !req
178. - A simple pin tumbler?Copy !req
179. Well, while you're
lobbing softballs,Copy !req
180. why not ask if I can design
a self-replicating nanobot?Copy !req
181. Which I can, obviously.Copy !req
182. Okay, slow and steady.Copy !req
183. They're on to us!Copy !req
184. Am I...Copy !req
185. on Broadway?Copy !req
186. I was born for this moment.Copy !req
187. A nice belt, but still.Copy !req
188. - It's an alligator!Copy !req
189. What?
Too pitchy?Copy !req
190. Please, don't lock me up.Copy !req
191. I didn't have to time
to rehearse.Copy !req
192. - They've got Roger.Copy !req
193. - Next stop,
the Gray Bar Hotel.Copy !req
194. - They're taking him
to a hotel?Copy !req
195. Well, that will be
a lovely home.Copy !req
196. Perhaps he'll find a mint
on his pillow.Copy !req
197. - We're canceling
Roger's reservation.Copy !req
198. Rico, grappling gun.Copy !req
199. - Follow my lead, boys.Copy !req
200. All right,
we're back in this thing.Copy !req
201. All we need to do—Copy !req
202. - Gah!Copy !req
203. - Men, commandeer this vehicle.Copy !req
204. - Penguins?Copy !req
205. - Kowalski, wheel man.Copy !req
206. Rico, gas.
Private, music.Copy !req
207. - Smooth jazz
or hot adult contemporary?Copy !req
208. - Let's classic rock
this chase.Copy !req
209. - And away we go.Copy !req
210. No! Look out! Ahh!Copy !req
211. - Not to worry, citizen.Copy !req
212. We'll return your vehicle
in factory condition.Copy !req
213. - Oopsie.
- Well, near factory condition.Copy !req
214. Left.Copy !req
215. Right.Copy !req
216. Left.Copy !req
217. Lot of left.
Whole lot of left.Copy !req
218. Rico, more gas.Copy !req
219. - You know what I mean,
soldier.Copy !req
220. - Heh-heh!Copy !req
221. - Skipper, can I do a pedal?Copy !req
222. - Sorry, Private.Copy !req
223. We won't be needing
brakes today.Copy !req
224. - Well, this is our stop.Copy !req
225. - Fast and furious, boys.Copy !req
226. Rico, blowtorch.Copy !req
227. - Guys!Copy !req
228. You came to rescue me!Copy !req
229. - Roger that, Roger.Copy !req
230. We're getting you a real home,Copy !req
231. not some dark, stinking hole
of woe and despair.Copy !req
232. - Um, Skipper?Copy !req
233. I think we've arrived
at the dark,Copy !req
234. stinking hole
of woe and despair, and...Copy !req
235. - And it's our hole.Copy !req
236. - We got the gator in the back.Copy !req
237. - Bring him in.Copy !req
238. We've got a nice, cozy habitatCopy !req
239. all set up for him.Copy !req
240. - Oh, well,
that simplifies things.Copy !req
241. - And so Gator Watch
comes to an endCopy !req
242. as the happy reptile
finds a new homeCopy !req
243. at the Central Park Zoo.Copy !req
244. All's well that ends well,
eh, Bonnie?Copy !req
245. - Right you are, Chuck.Copy !req
246. Coming up,
a Manhattan motorist swearsCopy !req
247. his car was commandeered by—
and I'm not making this up—Copy !req
248. penguins.Copy !req
249. - Hey!Copy !req
250. - Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi!Copy !req
251. Get out of me personals!Copy !req
252. It makes butter in my tummy!Copy !req
253. - Hey!
Whoa!Copy !req
254. Guys, outside,
there's all these menCopy !req
255. in the matching suits,Copy !req
256. and they have wands
that are all like,Copy !req
257. "Bleep, bloop, bloop,
bloop, beep, bleep!"Copy !req
258. and—Copy !req
259. okay, how am I
the paranoid one here?Copy !req
260. - Relax, Marlene.Copy !req
261. Have some morning nosh.Copy !req
262. - What?
Hey, I don't—Copy !req
263. - What you are seeingCopy !req
264. is the vanguard of democracy
in action.Copy !req
265. - No, I am seeing men in suits
with wands and blooping.Copy !req
266. - Today is the grand openingCopy !req
267. of our newest
up-charge attraction,Copy !req
268. the Central Park
Children's Zoo.Copy !req
269. - With the ribbon-cutting
ceremony by Purvis McSlade,Copy !req
270. New York's parks commissioner,Copy !req
271. the hero that gave us
zoo regulation 742-F.Copy !req
272. - Mm, the "fresh fish
for penguins" initiative.Copy !req
273. - Bless that man.Copy !req
274. - Uh-huh!Copy !req
275. - Now, if you're seeing men
in suits,Copy !req
276. that must mean
the commissioner's teamCopy !req
277. is making its final
security sweep.Copy !req
278. - How exciting!Copy !req
279. Can we go watch?Copy !req
280. - Negative, Private.Copy !req
281. Commissionorial security
is a high-stakes game.Copy !req
282. They don't need
four extra players.Copy !req
283. - Yeah, well, never mind;
they're leaving anyway.Copy !req
284. - What?Copy !req
285. - Hey!
- Leaving?Copy !req
286. They couldn't be done already.Copy !req
287. What kind of slapdash
security sweep is this?Copy !req
288. - I don't know.
Looks pretty safe to me.Copy !req
289. - "Looks," Marlene?
"Looks"?Copy !req
290. It's not the threats you see
with your eyes;Copy !req
291. it's the ones you feel
deep in your gut.Copy !req
292. - Uh-huh!Copy !req
293. - Where's the reflecting mirror
for satellite-based lasers?Copy !req
294. The titanium ground net
for tunneling mole robots?Copy !req
295. The comprehensive antidote kitCopy !req
296. to counteract
any mind-control gasCopy !req
297. sprayed by a villainous madman
with a superblimp?Copy !req
298. - A superblimp?
Really?Copy !req
299. - Go ahead and scoff.Copy !req
300. Superblimp madmen live
to smack down scoffers.Copy !req
301. This is Commissioner McSlade
we're talking about.Copy !req
302. If those kindergarten
crackerjacks can't protect him,Copy !req
303. then we will.Copy !req
304. Check one.Copy !req
305. - Check two.Copy !req
306. - Ow.Copy !req
307. - What is a Children's Zoo?Copy !req
308. A zoo for children?Copy !req
309. Yes.Copy !req
310. But more than that...Copy !req
311. - I want a total threat
neutralization in five.Copy !req
312. If you notice anything funny,
take it very seriously.Copy !req
313. Trip hazard, delta sector.Copy !req
314. I'm going in.Copy !req
315. Ha! Wha!Copy !req
316. Ba-ba-ba-ba-daba!Copy !req
317. Mm!Copy !req
318. - Sheep and donkeys,
goats and...Copy !req
319. odd little horses
side by side.Copy !req
320. There's a lesson in that
for all of us.Copy !req
321. - Nut-shaped grenade?Copy !req
322. - What, no outside food?Copy !req
323. - Uh, apparently, it's just
a nut-shaped nut.Copy !req
324. - I've got something.Copy !req
325. - What is it?
Missile? Chopper?Copy !req
326. - Superblimp?
Come on, superblimp!Copy !req
327. - Let me at 'em!
Come on!Copy !req
328. - Oh, never mind.Copy !req
329. It's only a pigeon.Copy !req
330. Oh.Copy !req
331. - Give me those.Copy !req
332. That smile.Copy !req
333. Sweet sky gravy!Copy !req
334. That bird's going gonna
drop oneCopy !req
335. on the commissioner's suit!Copy !req
336. - Huh?
- Drop what?Copy !req
337. - Yo, Alice.Copy !req
338. Pigeons really did a number
on these statues.Copy !req
339. It's like the stinkaroni salad
up here.Copy !req
340. Pee-yoo!Copy !req
341. - But, Skipper, why would the
commissioner be targeted by—Copy !req
342. - Pigeons!Copy !req
343. Now, there's an animal
I have no use for.Copy !req
344. Filthy disease-mongers.Copy !req
345. But thanks
to parks regulation 758-P,Copy !req
346. my anti-pigeon initiative,Copy !req
347. we are actively chasing
the little beggarsCopy !req
348. out of our parks
and public spaces.Copy !req
349. - Hey, Mr. Commissioner!Copy !req
350. I'ma show you
some of my initiative.Copy !req
351. - Rico!Copy !req
352. - Whoaaaa!Copy !req
353. - Ooh!
Say what?Copy !req
354. What?Copy !req
355. - Skipper!Copy !req
356. - How did you know that birdCopy !req
357. had a beef
with the commissioner?Copy !req
358. - I've seen that look before,
right beforeCopy !req
359. our last commissioner
took a plop to the left lapel.Copy !req
360. Got him right where
a pretty flower would go.Copy !req
361. It's just a suit, isn't it?Copy !req
362. - There were blueberries,
Private.Copy !req
363. Blue... berries.Copy !req
364. It was a beautiful day—Copy !req
365. sunny, clear.Copy !req
366. Pigeon came in low and slow
from due east.Copy !req
367. I don't know why
I didn't jump inCopy !req
368. and take it for him.Copy !req
369. That day, I swore I'd never seeCopy !req
370. another public official
blueberried,Copy !req
371. not on my watch.Copy !req
372. - Gee, that's too bad.Copy !req
373. 'Cause before that ribbon's cut,
this commissioner's gonnaCopy !req
374. be wearing some doody
on the suity.Copy !req
375. - Grab him!Copy !req
376. - Skipper, what do we do now?Copy !req
377. - You heard the pigeon,
Private.Copy !req
378. He's sworn to do his dirty deedCopy !req
379. before the commissioner cuts
that ribbon.Copy !req
380. The clock... is... ticking.Copy !req
381. - So were the dramatic pauses
really necessary, then?Copy !req
382. - Yes.Copy !req
383. - Blast!
He's flying circles around us.Copy !req
384. Kowalski, options.Copy !req
385. - Well, I could pull...Copy !req
386. this branch.Copy !req
387. - Stick.
Your option is a stick.Copy !req
388. - I pulled the wrong one,
all right?Copy !req
389. I have upgraded
the standard jet packCopy !req
390. with a full weapons array
and auxiliary turbos.Copy !req
391. It's all untested,
but I'm 51.7% certainCopy !req
392. it won't erupt
in a gaseous fireballCopy !req
393. the size of a dwarf sun.Copy !req
394. - That's slightly over half.Copy !req
395. - Why, those are odds
we can most likely live with.Copy !req
396. Prelaunch waggle.Copy !req
397. - Hey, penguins!Copy !req
398. I guess I got the drop on you.Copy !req
399. - There are many words
that rhyme with "zoo."Copy !req
400. "New."Copy !req
401. - Ah! Ooh! Ow!Copy !req
402. I'm trying to fly here!Copy !req
403. - Ah!Copy !req
404. He's trying to lose me
in the sycamore.Copy !req
405. Converge!Copy !req
406. - Don't worry, Skipper.Copy !req
407. He can't get away
from all of us.Copy !req
408. - Now, boys, check every face.Copy !req
409. - They're identical, Skipper.Copy !req
410. What are we looking for?Copy !req
411. - The look of pure,
suit-staining evil.Copy !req
412. - I got news for you, pal.Copy !req
413. We all want to see
the commissioner getCopy !req
414. what's coming to him.Copy !req
415. - And so, without further ado—Copy !req
416. That also rhymes with "zoo."Copy !req
417. Better push back my 3:00 p.m.
merry-go-round dedication.Copy !req
418. - Hansel and Gretel special,
on my mark.Copy !req
419. Execute.Copy !req
420. - Skipper, look!Copy !req
421. - Blueberries.
It's him.Copy !req
422. Empty.Copy !req
423. Kowalski, fire the turbos.Copy !req
424. - The turbos?Copy !req
425. But they're highly unstable.Copy !req
426. It's too dangerous.Copy !req
427. - That was an order, soldier.Copy !req
428. Now, pop this soda.Copy !req
429. - Here comes the payback
from my way back.Copy !req
430. - Skipper,
the package has dropped.Copy !req
431. - For...
the commissioner's... suit!Copy !req
432. - Noooooo!Copy !req
433. Ugh!Copy !req
434. - Fireworks!
I like it.Copy !req
435. Good for the old
parks commission spirit.Copy !req
436. Rah, rah!Copy !req
437. - Whatever, weirdo.Copy !req
438. - Sir, your merry-go-round
dedication.Copy !req
439. - No, wait!
I can make another one.Copy !req
440. Just—just give me a sec,
all right?Copy !req
441. Oh, come on!Copy !req
442. - Skipper?Copy !req
443. Talk to me.Copy !req
444. - Oh!
- I've seen... worse.Copy !req
445. - That's true.Copy !req
446. I'm sure a good scrubbing
with soap and...Copy !req
447. sandpaper—Copy !req
448. - What?
- Skipper, what—how did—Copy !req
449. - Standard-issue
pigeon-proof vest.Copy !req
450. Like I said, never again.Copy !req
451. And so let us bid farewellCopy !req
452. to the bravest article
of clothing I've ever known.Copy !req
453. Well done, suit.Copy !req
454. - What—you hear that?Copy !req
455. No. No. Noooo!Copy !req
456. Oh, man!Copy !req
457. Any of you guys know how to get
blueberries out of feathers?Copy !req
458. - Now, that's what I call
poo-etic justice.Copy !req
459. See what I did?
I played with a word.Copy !req
460. - Yes, we're all enjoying
your toilet humor, Private.Copy !req
461. Real classy.Copy !req
462. - Oh, right.Copy !req
463. Poo.
Tee-hee!Copy !req