1. - Cute and cuddly, boys.Copy !req
2. - The Vesuvius twins.
- Oof.Copy !req
3. - Okay, kiddies,Copy !req
4. time to go make someone else's
life miserable.Copy !req
5. - Cool!
- I love misery!Copy !req
6. - Is it really over?Copy !req
7. - And with no permanent
injuries or—Copy !req
8. Backpack!Copy !req
9. - Well, well.Copy !req
10. Looks like tweedle-dim
and tweedle-dangerousCopy !req
11. forgot their goody bag.Copy !req
12. - Skipper,
a Vesuvius boy's backpackCopy !req
13. is a minefield of deadly peril.Copy !req
14. Firecrackers,
shaken-up soda cans,Copy !req
15. sharpened number 2 pencils.Copy !req
16. - I know. Free arsenal, right?Copy !req
17. - I don't know.Copy !req
18. - Of course,
it's dangerous, compadre.Copy !req
19. That's why we are
not taking any chances.Copy !req
20. Private is.
- What?Copy !req
21. - You're doing great!Copy !req
22. Oh, phew.Copy !req
23. It's just a bunch
of superhero comic—Copy !req
24. - Drop the comics, Private!Copy !req
25. - Huh?Copy !req
26. - What's wrong, Skipper?Copy !req
27. Some hidden danger
inside the comic books?Copy !req
28. - You blind fools.Copy !req
29. Comic books are the danger.Copy !req
30. - Uh, what?Copy !req
31. - Spangly costumes
and shouted catchphrasesCopy !req
32. are the mortal enemies
of covert operations.Copy !req
33. We work in shadows,
not stretchy pants.Copy !req
34. - Surely there's no harm
in reading about superheroes.Copy !req
35. Or in our case, looking at
all the pretty pictures.Copy !req
36. - That's always
where it starts.Copy !req
37. And it ends with
some geeked-out yahooCopy !req
38. playing dandy lad dress-up.Copy !req
39. Look at these things!Copy !req
40. Fancy-suited heroes.
- Oh...Copy !req
41. - High-tech gadgetry!
- Ah...Copy !req
42. - Page after page
of epic combat!Copy !req
43. - Nope, the pull of
caped crime fightingCopy !req
44. is too great for the weak
and nerdy-minded.Copy !req
45. Uh-huh.Copy !req
46. - Well, I'm off
to the dumpster.Copy !req
47. - That... need... look at...Copy !req
48. Uh-uh.Copy !req
49. - What if Skipper wakes up?Copy !req
50. - Well, he's going to
sleep like a baby,Copy !req
51. courtesy of Mr. Snoozytime's
fighty nighty-night mobile.Copy !req
52. - He's so sweet
when he dreams aboutCopy !req
53. vanquishing his mortal enemies.Copy !req
54. - They're more glorious
than I dreamed.Copy !req
55. To the picture book nook!Copy !req
56. - These things are fantastic!
- Totally!Copy !req
57. - Yeah! Yeah!
- And look at us.Copy !req
58. We're not out playing dress-upCopy !req
59. in spangly uniforms.Copy !req
60. That Skipper doesn't know
what he's talking about.Copy !req
61. - Pfft, yeah.Copy !req
62. To be a real superhero,Copy !req
63. you'd need
some special ability,Copy !req
64. like Rico's power vomiting.Copy !req
65. - My car!Copy !req
66. - Ah-ah!Copy !req
67. - Or—or some kind of
special suit.Copy !req
68. - Like my armor.Copy !req
69. - And, well, obviously,Copy !req
70. you couldn't have a super teamCopy !req
71. without a resident
super genius.Copy !req
72. Midnight... the hour when evilCopy !req
73. slithers out to wreak its...Copy !req
74. evil.Copy !req
75. But beware, evil,
for this zoo is guarded by...Copy !req
76. - Steel Penguin!Copy !req
77. - The Throbbing Cerebellum!Copy !req
78. - Barf Bag!Copy !req
79. - Barf Bag, really?Copy !req
80. I thought we agreed
on Wonder Tongue.Copy !req
81. - Barf Bag!Copy !req
82. This is the coolest thing
we've ever done.Copy !req
83. - Agreed.
Let's go thwart some evil!Copy !req
84. - Ain't no secret
to a good wet Willy.Copy !req
85. You just just got to let
the mucus do what it do.Copy !req
86. - Huh?
- Wha—Copy !req
87. - Ah!Copy !req
88. - Whoa!Copy !req
89. - Hey!
- What's a matter here?Copy !req
90. - Stop being naughty!Copy !req
91. - Huh?
- Ooh, good catchphrase.Copy !req
92. - Oh, help me!Copy !req
93. Ah! Oh!Copy !req
94. I wanted to see
where the air lives.Copy !req
95. - Stop being naughty.Copy !req
96. - Ooh.Copy !req
97. Okay.Copy !req
98. This is the most uncomfortable
pillow in the world.Copy !req
99. Agh!Copy !req
100. - Stop being naughty.Copy !req
101. - What in the—Copy !req
102. oh, well, this is nice.Copy !req
103. - So I guess that was pretty
much it on the evil tonight.Copy !req
104. - Yup.Copy !req
105. - Ooh, the clock tower's
a few minutes slow.Copy !req
106. That's inconvenient.Copy !req
107. - To the clock tower!Copy !req
108. - Yes!
- Woo-hoo!Copy !req
109. - And thus the dawn rises
on a crime-free morning.Copy !req
110. Gentlemen,
we've done some good.Copy !req
111. - Oof!
- What in the world's going on?Copy !req
112. - Big Ben almighty!
What's the racket?Copy !req
113. - Ditch the evidence!Copy !req
114. - Nice reaction time, boys.Copy !req
115. I didn't even see you
leave the lair.Copy !req
116. - Yeah. How about that?Copy !req
117. - Anybody catch a peep
at the perp?Copy !req
118. - We've already made
a thorough search,Copy !req
119. and there's absolutely
zero evidence anywhere,Copy !req
120. so we should all leave now
without asking any questions.Copy !req
121. Who wants snow cones?Copy !req
122. - I'll take two!
- You got rainbow?Copy !req
123. - What's a snow cone?Copy !req
124. - I have a question, Kowalski.Copy !req
125. Why is there a cape
stuck to your foot?Copy !req
126. - I don't see a—Copy !req
127. - Not just a cape,
a spangly superhero cape.Copy !req
128. - Yo, I seen that cape
last night.Copy !req
129. Couple of super guys
totally interrupted our, uh...Copy !req
130. - Legitimate
business endeavors.Copy !req
131. - Deviled ham!
Some starry-eyed milksopCopy !req
132. must have gotten hold
of those accursed comic books!Copy !req
133. - Skipper, I think I know—Copy !req
134. - How to catch
these misguided nerds:Copy !req
135. an old-fashioned stakeout.Copy !req
136. - A stakeout, eh?Copy !req
137. I like it.Copy !req
138. Assemble the usual supplies.Copy !req
139. We roll with the dusk.Copy !req
140. - So we're having a stakeout
to catch ourselves.Copy !req
141. - No, we're having a stakeout
to catch nobody.Copy !req
142. When no superheroes show,Copy !req
143. Skipper will assume
they've given up,Copy !req
144. and we can forget
this whole thing.Copy !req
145. - Oh.
- Ooh.Copy !req
146. - That's impressive.Copy !req
147. - Yes, the cerebellum
never stops throbbing.Copy !req
148. - Huh, a super no-show.Copy !req
149. Well, looks like
they've given up, boys.Copy !req
150. Well, I guess
we can call it a—Copy !req
151. - Flamingo habitat.
Move in!Copy !req
152. - And then some freak in a capeCopy !req
153. zoomed through
and took my lucky feather.Copy !req
154. - So now it's come
to super thievery.Copy !req
155. Curse you, comic books!Copy !req
156. - Someone in a cape?Copy !req
157. How is that even—
- Peanuts!Copy !req
158. What kind of monster would
swipe a guy's peanut bag?Copy !req
159. - Mysterious supervillain
in a cape?Copy !req
160. - Wow, I was
just being rhetorical,Copy !req
161. but, yeah, how'd you know?Copy !req
162. - Stop! Thief!Copy !req
163. - Engage that billowy cape!Copy !req
164. Blast! This thief is
a slippery geek indeed.Copy !req
165. - We've hidden the truth
long enough, Kowalski.Copy !req
166. There's a real bad guy
out there nowCopy !req
167. and there's only one wayCopy !req
168. to stop a supervillain.
- Right!Copy !req
169. Rico, I'm gonna need a
claw hammer, 16 roofing nails,Copy !req
170. and a presidential pardon.Copy !req
171. - No. The answer is...Copy !req
172. with superheroes.Copy !req
173. - Fine.Copy !req
174. - Also, we broke the clock.Copy !req
175. - Yeah, I got that.Copy !req
176. - Help, save the royalty!Copy !req
177. - Fear not, citizen.
Justice approaches! Hyah!Copy !req
178. - Do you have to
talk like that?Copy !req
179. - Sorry.Copy !req
180. - Um, what's going on?Copy !req
181. - Julien? Where are you?Copy !req
182. Oh, hello.Copy !req
183. Welcome to my trap.Copy !req
184. - No way!Copy !req
185. - Our mystery foe is Julien?Copy !req
186. - Well, it's—no.Copy !req
187. No.Copy !req
188. It is not this Julien.Copy !req
189. It is I who is me,Copy !req
190. the Masked Booty!Copy !req
191. - But you're not
wearing a mask.Copy !req
192. - Ugh.
- Oh.Copy !req
193. - Oh, please.Copy !req
194. - Who is the bottom
in your face?Copy !req
195. You don't know
because it's wearing a mask.Copy !req
196. - Get him!Copy !req
197. - Look, I've been readingCopy !req
198. about it in these picture booksCopy !req
199. I found by the dump box.Copy !req
200. It's all in there.Copy !req
201. - Ringtail, you lunatic!Copy !req
202. You're aping the bad guy.Copy !req
203. - Wait, uh, I don't think so.Copy !req
204. See...Copy !req
205. He puts on a mask,Copy !req
206. and then everybody has to
give him all their stuff.Copy !req
207. It's like being a super king.Copy !req
208. - Didn't you read to the end?Copy !req
209. The inevitable comeuppance?Copy !req
210. - Of course, I read it to the—
oh, no.Copy !req
211. - Agh!
- Ow!Copy !req
212. - Well, then, allow me to
teach you how this story ends.Copy !req
213. - Skipper, you?Copy !req
214. You're a comic book geek?Copy !req
215. - Yes, and way to really
underline the irony, Private.Copy !req
216. And now it's time
the Masked BootyCopy !req
217. met my superhero alter-ego:Copy !req
218. Slappy Hurtpunch.Copy !req
219. - Slappy Hurtpunch?Copy !req
220. Are you serious?
That is your name?Copy !req
221. Do you even have
any super powers, Slappy?Copy !req
222. - Just one.Copy !req
223. Slap! Hurt! Punch!Copy !req
224. - Hold on a second.Copy !req
225. He's my wacky comicry book
sound effects guy.Copy !req
226. It's great, isn't it?Copy !req
227. And we fight.Copy !req
228. - Blam.Copy !req
229. - Whoof!Copy !req
230. - Pow.Copy !req
231. Krack-a-kowie.Copy !req
232. No more.Copy !req
233. I am making
my super retirement.Copy !req
234. - Retirement.Copy !req
235. - Thanks, Slappy.Copy !req
236. No, no, seriously.Copy !req
237. Cool name.Copy !req
238. - Did you really have to be
so thorough with him?Copy !req
239. - You know how these comic book
stories go, Private,Copy !req
240. always copping out
with some ambiguous endingCopy !req
241. to keep you hooked
for the next time.Copy !req
242. Well, you can take it
from Ringtail.Copy !req
243. This is absolutely,
without question, the end.Copy !req
244. - That's debatable.Copy !req
245. - Men, we live as a unit,
we fight as a unit,Copy !req
246. and we sleep as a unit.Copy !req
247. It's been a rough weekCopy !req
248. in the battle for shut-eye.Copy !req
249. Ah!Copy !req
250. - The lemur auditory assault
has been merciless.Copy !req
251. - But tonight,
it's doze or die.Copy !req
252. Arm yourselves for lights out.Copy !req
253. - Uh, nightcap, Skipper?Copy !req
254. - Good point.Copy !req
255. Warm milk puts me outCopy !req
256. like a teeny-tiny little baby.Copy !req
257. - I mean,
that's not your nightcap.Copy !req
258. That is.Copy !req
259. - Okay.Copy !req
260. Maybe I'm not 100%
sleep-shape, ship-wise.Copy !req
261. - Commencing
lights out protocol.Copy !req
262. - Whoa, whoa, whoa.Copy !req
263. Where's the Private?Copy !req
264. - For my kind author,
when I may curtsy,Copy !req
265. bid me farewell.Copy !req
266. - Oh, bravo! Bravo!Copy !req
267. Lights out!Copy !req
268. Reporting, Skipper.Copy !req
269. Sorry, I was—
- Fraternizing with the enemy.Copy !req
270. Is that it, Private?Copy !req
271. Have you finally flipped on us?Copy !req
272. - No, Skipper, never.Copy !req
273. See, the play's the thing.Copy !req
274. I was—
- Save it!Copy !req
275. I'll wring the answers
out of you in the A.M.Copy !req
276. Now hit the bunks.Copy !req
277. - What's up with Skipper?Copy !req
278. He seems a bit crabby
and paranoid.Copy !req
279. I mean, you know,
more than usual.Copy !req
280. - Lemur party-induced
chronic insomnia,Copy !req
281. commonly known as L.P.I.C.I.,Copy !req
282. at least by me.Copy !req
283. Earlier tonight,
he spent an hourCopy !req
284. interrogating
the coffee machine.Copy !req
285. - Give me your dark,
beany secrets.Copy !req
286. - Oh, Skipper.Copy !req
287. "Good night, sweet prince,
and flights of angels—"Copy !req
288. - Batten it, Private.Copy !req
289. - 10:00 P.M.
Lights out. Seriously.Copy !req
290. - Ten of the clocks!Copy !req
291. I declare Lemur-morial
Day's Eve festivitiesCopy !req
292. open for partyings!Copy !req
293. - Sweet and sour meatballs!
Don't those lemurs ever sleep?Copy !req
294. Kowalski, review recent
boom box countermeasures.Copy !req
295. - Let's see.Copy !req
296. Monday, asked nicely
to turn music down.Copy !req
297. - Be quiet!Copy !req
298. - Hey, this is New York,
the city that never sleeps!Copy !req
299. - Because of you!Copy !req
300. - Tuesday, gave dirty looks.Copy !req
301. - Oof!Copy !req
302. Wednesday, blasted penguin
mating calls full volume.Copy !req
303. - No effect,
at least not on the lemurs.Copy !req
304. - How you doing?Copy !req
305. - Recommendations
for next move.Copy !req
306. - "To be, or not to be:
that is the question."Copy !req
307. - We need action, not waffling.Copy !req
308. Rico.Copy !req
309. - Voila!Copy !req
310. - I like the way
you think, soldier.Copy !req
311. - Perhaps we should try
diplomacy.Copy !req
312. The art of resolving disputes
by negotiationCopy !req
313. or other non-military means.Copy !req
314. - Mm-hmm, great.
Why don't we just haveCopy !req
315. a quilting bee
while we're at it?Copy !req
316. - I know,
it goes against every boneCopy !req
317. in your thermo-regulated body,
Skipper,Copy !req
318. but the diplomatic approach
has been known to work.Copy !req
319. Except when it doesn't.Copy !req
320. - All right.Copy !req
321. Anything to get
a few dozen winks.Copy !req
322. - At the behestCopy !req
323. of the penguins, we call these
peace treaty talks to order.Copy !req
324. Ah, quite right, Phil.Copy !req
325. That is,
disturbing the peace treaty.Copy !req
326. - Thank you, thank you.Copy !req
327. As king, I will speak first.Copy !req
328. I shall give to you,Copy !req
329. uh, Mort,Copy !req
330. and you shall,
you know, go away.Copy !req
331. - Oh, I'm a bargaining chip,
yay!Copy !req
332. - We demand a 10:00 curfew.Copy !req
333. - No prob—hey!Copy !req
334. 10:00? Ten?Copy !req
335. Okay, we have not even begun
to rock out by then.Copy !req
336. I laugh at that.Copy !req
337. - "Oh, Ruffians
that will swear,Copy !req
338. "dance, revel the night!Copy !req
339. Hours filled up with riots,
banquets, sports!"Copy !req
340. - Private, knock off
the old-timey yackety-yak!Copy !req
341. We're negotiating.
- But—but Skipper, it's—Copy !req
342. - Time for you to be
confined to quarters.Copy !req
343. On the double.
- Aye, milord.Copy !req
344. "And so, from hour to hour,
we rot and rot."Copy !req
345. Oh, goody!
I can still catch the show.Copy !req
346. - And so we return, conquering,
uh—what's that wordCopy !req
347. for weaklings again?
- Diplomats.Copy !req
348. - All I know is I'm finally
gonna win the battleCopy !req
349. for the land of nod.Copy !req
350. Private's gone AWOL again!Copy !req
351. Game over, Private.Copy !req
352. Who you working for?Copy !req
353. - "I am amazed
and know not what to say."Copy !req
354. - That code again.Copy !req
355. Who's your outside contact?Copy !req
356. - Skipper,
Private's no double agent.Copy !req
357. He can't even cheat at Go Fish.Copy !req
358. - All right.
Stand down, Rico.Copy !req
359. - Know this, Private.Copy !req
360. I may be operating
on short sleep rations,Copy !req
361. but I have
one watery, bloodshot,Copy !req
362. highly trained eye on you.Copy !req
363. Understood?
- Aye, verily.Copy !req
364. - And one more thing!Copy !req
365. I have one watery, bloodshot,
highly trained eye on you.Copy !req
366. Understood?Copy !req
367. - Disturbing the peace treaty
talks, round two.Copy !req
368. - We've reviewed the treaty.Copy !req
369. It's one-sided, demoralizing,
insulting—Copy !req
370. oh, two-ply—and good to go.Copy !req
371. - Not so quickly, tuxedo bird.Copy !req
372. We wish to add
some teensy appendages.Copy !req
373. Note the last item there.Copy !req
374. Your big-brained penguin
will invent for meCopy !req
375. the solar-powered karaoke.Copy !req
376. - Oh, oh, and this one time,
this guy said,Copy !req
377. "Better a witty fool
than a foolish wit."Copy !req
378. Ooh, how great is that?Copy !req
379. - Hold on a minute.Copy !req
380. All right, keep talking.Copy !req
381. - We had a deal.Copy !req
382. - And we still do.Copy !req
383. I have just swapped
the parts I don't likeCopy !req
384. with the parts I do like.Copy !req
385. Take it or heave it.
- Leave it.Copy !req
386. - Leave it?
Wait, leave what?Copy !req
387. - I'll sign.Copy !req
388. - Skipper, you're not
thinking clearly.Copy !req
389. - "A pox upon you,
you muddy rascals!"Copy !req
390. That was a good one.Copy !req
391. - Don't try to confuse me
with your legalese.Copy !req
392. - How about, "You're just
little leather jerkin,Copy !req
393. "crystal-button, agate-ring,
puke-stocking,Copy !req
394. caddis-garter,
Spanish-pouches!"Copy !req
395. - It's true!Copy !req
396. I think.Copy !req
397. - I do not know these words,Copy !req
398. but I know when I am insulted,Copy !req
399. and I am insulted!Copy !req
400. I heave it.Copy !req
401. - Wait, he didn't mean it.Copy !req
402. Where's a pen? I need a pen.Copy !req
403. - Too late.Copy !req
404. Eh, good luck snoozing tonight.Copy !req
405. I am turning the volumes knobby
up to me-leven... teen!Copy !req
406. - No! He doesn't speak for us.Copy !req
407. He's gone AWOL!Copy !req
408. He's a turncoat!Copy !req
409. Turncoat!Copy !req
410. - You're really not
thinking clearly.Copy !req
411. But Skipper, it was justCopy !req
412. Shakespeare in the park.Copy !req
413. - Spears! Shaking!
In the park.Copy !req
414. It's worse than I thought.Copy !req
415. Did you hear that? Artillery.Copy !req
416. The Spear-shakers are coming.Copy !req
417. Put Private in lockdown.Copy !req
418. - But Skipper—
- That's an order, Kowalski!Copy !req
419. - Now, you might want to
dial back ye olde fancy talk.Copy !req
420. Do you even know
what those words mean?Copy !req
421. - Uh, nay?Copy !req
422. - The blast of war
blows in our ears.Copy !req
423. - Hear that voice?
That's war talk.Copy !req
424. Just look at the size
of that enemy encampment.Copy !req
425. There must be
nearly 1892 of them.Copy !req
426. - Looks to me like an innocent
theatrical presentation.Copy !req
427. - What have kings
that Privates have not too?Copy !req
428. - You call that innocent?
It's in code again.Copy !req
429. Something about
making Private a king.Copy !req
430. - Do you really think—
- This is not a drill!Copy !req
431. It's a full-on coup!Copy !req
432. Initiate operation break spear.Copy !req
433. Phase one,
locate enemy munitions.Copy !req
434. - Please,
we've got to help Skipper.Copy !req
435. He's got acute
sleep deprivation.Copy !req
436. - La-la-la-la-la.Copy !req
437. I'm not hearing
why you think he's cute,Copy !req
438. you traitor, you.
- I'm not a traitor!Copy !req
439. I was just quoting Shakespeare.Copy !req
440. That last one
was from "King Henry V."Copy !req
441. - What?Copy !req
442. Who is claiming to be
a king named Henry?Copy !req
443. That is a very stupid name
for a king.Copy !req
444. You will lead me to
this stupid Henry immediatelyCopy !req
445. so as to ridicule his name
and physical appearance.Copy !req
446. - Prepare for combat.Copy !req
447. - I love thee, Kate.Copy !req
448. I kiss your hand,
and I call you my queen.Copy !req
449. Wait, what play are we doing?Copy !req
450. - Oh, look!Copy !req
451. That guys is hitting
that other guyCopy !req
452. with sharp pointy metal.Copy !req
453. - I took stage combat
at Yale drama.Copy !req
454. - Should have gone
to knight school.Copy !req
455. - It's the guys!Copy !req
456. - If I know anything
about sword fights,Copy !req
457. they're losing big-time.Copy !req
458. Come on!Copy !req
459. - There are animals everywhere!Copy !req
460. - Skipper.Copy !req
461. - I will interrupt
that silly king.Copy !req
462. - Perhaps a diversion.Copy !req
463. - No cannonballs.Copy !req
464. - What play is this?Copy !req
465. - Okay, I have two big
problematic problems with you,Copy !req
466. you pretend-y king.Copy !req
467. Rabid spider monkey!
- What?Copy !req
468. - Hi, guys!Copy !req
469. - You... traitor!Copy !req
470. What have I done?Copy !req
471. What have I done?Copy !req
472. What have I done?Copy !req
473. - He definitely needs a nap.Copy !req
474. - Forgive me, Private.Copy !req
475. - I'll forgive you, Skipper.Copy !req
476. It's not your fault
you can't sleep.Copy !req
477. - Private!Copy !req
478. You should be with
Manfredi and Johnson!Copy !req
479. You know, one up there,
one down there.Copy !req
480. - No, it's make-believe, see?
Harmless.Copy !req
481. - Oh, no, it isn't.Copy !req
482. - You fat-witted,
clay-brained guts,Copy !req
483. you knotty-pated fool.Copy !req
484. I love this theater thing.Copy !req
485. I am adding season tickets
to our list of demands.Copy !req
486. - I don't think we need
a treaty anymore.Copy !req
487. Skipper's finally found a place
he can get some sleep.Copy !req