1. - Cute and cuddly, boys.Copy !req
2. - Yup, summer in NYC.Copy !req
3. The heat goes on.Copy !req
4. Temps are expected
to hit record highs again today,Copy !req
5. with no relief in sight.Copy !req
6. - Sky spirits, I vow to continue
shaking my bootyCopy !req
7. until you cry your cool tears
of rain down upon us.Copy !req
8. Mort, shake a little more
to the left.Copy !req
9. Maurice, keep your arms up.Copy !req
10. - Either I'm hallucinating
or the bouncy is melting.Copy !req
11. - I am stroking the heat.Copy !req
12. - We need some fresh
dancing legs.Copy !req
13. - Kowalski, how's that
deck temperature looking?Copy !req
14. - Let's see.Copy !req
15. I would describe
the surface as...Copy !req
16. A searing inferno of agony.Copy !req
17. - Poetic.Copy !req
18. Private, what have we got
between us and the water?Copy !req
19. - I'm picking up
some small patches of shadeCopy !req
20. at two, four, and six meters.Copy !req
21. - Right.
Follow my lead.Copy !req
22. And... go.Copy !req
23. And... go.Copy !req
24. And... go.
Now!Copy !req
25. - Hey, birds.Copy !req
26. I command you to join us
in our rain dancing at once.Copy !req
27. - Not much on rhythm,Copy !req
28. but you got to love
their enthusiasm.Copy !req
29. - I smell burning feets.Copy !req
30. - Every man for himself!Copy !req
31. - Uh-oh.Copy !req
32. Our water, it's all gone!Copy !req
33. - They've drained
our entire pool.Copy !req
34. - Those maniacs!Copy !req
35. You do not ever get between
a penguin and his water.Copy !req
36. - Must swim. Must swim.
Must swim.Copy !req
37. - Ever.Copy !req
38. - Uh, guys?
It's not just you.Copy !req
39. They drained all the pools
across the entire zoo.Copy !req
40. - Gentlemen,
this is our destination,Copy !req
41. the cool, clear,
and refreshing waterCopy !req
42. of the East River.Copy !req
43. - It's—it's like
a storybook fairy tale.Copy !req
44. - But, Skipper, can we make it
with Alice watching?Copy !req
45. - No, which is why
she's leaving.Copy !req
46. - We're giving away
one all-expense-paid cruiseCopy !req
47. to our third caller.Copy !req
48. Congratulations!Copy !req
49. You're our third caller,Copy !req
50. and that means
you are the winnerCopy !req
51. of a free weekend cruise.Copy !req
52. - Huh?
What's—huh?Copy !req
53. A free weekend cruise?Copy !req
54. Uh, yeah, okay.
I can do that.Copy !req
55. - Bon voyage, Alice.Copy !req
56. Looks like
she'll be off our backsCopy !req
57. for the next three days.Copy !req
58. - And look, that must be
her substitute arriving now.Copy !req
59. - Whatstitute?Copy !req
60. - Isn't that...Copy !req
61. Officer "X"?Copy !req
62. - Now apparently zookeeper "X."Copy !req
63. He's come back
to exact his revenge.Copy !req
64. - Don't be ridiculous.Copy !req
65. He's probably forgotten
all about us by now.Copy !req
66. Mm, penguins.Copy !req
67. - Uh-oh.Copy !req
68. - Is everyone in position?Copy !req
69. Okay, now do...Copy !req
70. Now do...Copy !req
71. Yes! Yes!Copy !req
72. It's working!Copy !req
73. Oh, the sweet taste
of raining waters.Copy !req
74. - Actually,
that's just my sweat.Copy !req
75. - Okay, that would explain
the saltiness.Copy !req
76. - Well, well, well,
Mr. Penguins.Copy !req
77. I say that the four of you made
just one tiny mistakeCopy !req
78. the last time we met.Copy !req
79. You didn't finish me off.Copy !req
80. - That's what I said.Copy !req
81. - This time,
I'm in the one in charge,Copy !req
82. so if you're thinking
about making mischief,Copy !req
83. you better think again,Copy !req
84. 'cause you're all
in my house now.Copy !req
85. Oh, what's the matter?Copy !req
86. You boys sweating a bit
under the hot sun?Copy !req
87. - Technically, penguins don't
perspire so much as—Copy !req
88. - Get used to it!Copy !req
89. Because the sun is nothing
compared to the heatCopy !req
90. I'm bringing
onto your feathered butts.Copy !req
91. I am the Sahara in July.Copy !req
92. I am a five-alarm fury
burning out of control.Copy !req
93. I am molten magma mayhem.Copy !req
94. - But, Skipper,
what about swimming?Copy !req
95. What about the East River?Copy !req
96. - Zookeeper "x"
is going to be all over usCopy !req
97. every second of every day.Copy !req
98. - Then we go at night.Copy !req
99. - If we make it to Lex,Copy !req
100. we can catch the "E" train
to the river.Copy !req
101. - Rico, token us.Copy !req
102. - Sorry, penguins,Copy !req
103. but you birds are all catching
the officer x-press to nowheres.Copy !req
104. - Run!Copy !req
105. - Skipper, what now?Copy !req
106. - Must swim! Must swim!Copy !req
107. - We dig.Copy !req
108. - I just need to calculateCopy !req
109. precisely where
we should break through.Copy !req
110. Huh?Copy !req
111. - "X" marks the spot.Copy !req
112. - Not even Alice knows about
this backup ventilation shaft.Copy !req
113. - Allow me to blow your minds.Copy !req
114. - "X"!Copy !req
115. "X"!Copy !req
116. "X"!Copy !req
117. "X" again!Copy !req
118. - I don't understand it.Copy !req
119. - It's like he's always
one step ahead of us.Copy !req
120. - Yup.Copy !req
121. - It seems I've turned
your world upside down, hmm?Copy !req
122. - Men, I've lost battles before.Copy !req
123. That I can handle.Copy !req
124. But he keeps zinging us
with those one-liners.Copy !req
125. I won't have it!Copy !req
126. - Skipper,
what are we going to do?Copy !req
127. - Something very rash,
something totally unexpected.Copy !req
128. - According to this compass,
the East River is due...Copy !req
129. thataway.Copy !req
130. - Swim, swim!Copy !req
131. - Roger that.Copy !req
132. Any sign of "X"?Copy !req
133. - It's all clear, Skipper.Copy !req
134. - And at 400 feet and climbing,Copy !req
135. I don't think there's much
chance of running into him.Copy !req
136. We're home free.Copy !req
137. - I guess you're right, Skipper.Copy !req
138. You know, unless Officer "X"
did somethingCopy !req
139. like hide inside
the pretzel cartCopy !req
140. before we took off.Copy !req
141. - Hey, what?Copy !req
142. - Well, you have to admit
it's kind of strange.Copy !req
143. We ran all over the zoo
gathering suppliesCopy !req
144. and didn't see Officer "X",
not even once.Copy !req
145. I'm just saying it's possibleCopy !req
146. that Officer "X" could have
anticipated our planCopy !req
147. and might have hidden in the
cart's pretzel compartmentCopy !req
148. before we took off.Copy !req
149. - That has to be
just the most ridiculous—Copy !req
150. - You can't possibly imagineCopy !req
151. the statistical improbability
that, well—Copy !req
152. - That Officer "X",
the Officer "X",Copy !req
153. is hiding... down there.Copy !req
154. - Just inches below our...
very feet.Copy !req
155. - Well, the very idea—
I mean, it's—Copy !req
156. it's just that it's so—Copy !req
157. - It's so—so—so—so—so—so—Copy !req
158. - So totally obvious!Copy !req
159. Battle stations!Copy !req
160. On three.Copy !req
161. One.Copy !req
162. Two.Copy !req
163. I can't do it!Copy !req
164. I mean, what if
he's really in there?Copy !req
165. What if he leaps out with
one of those witty one-liners?Copy !req
166. Probably something
about pretzels.Copy !req
167. - Something like, "I'll bet
you never expected this twist."Copy !req
168. - Exactly.
- Come on.Copy !req
169. Now you're the ones
being silly.Copy !req
170. Look.
See for yourselves.Copy !req
171. - Oh, he's right.
There's nothing there.Copy !req
172. - Nothing but pretzel salt.Copy !req
173. - Evening, boys.Copy !req
174. This is where I rub some salt
into the wound.Copy !req
175. - Mort, shift three inches
to your left.Copy !req
176. Maurice, grab Mort's tail.Copy !req
177. Well, sky spirits?Copy !req
178. Are we getting warmer here?Copy !req
179. Give us a sign.Copy !req
180. - Well, it's raining penguins.Copy !req
181. I guess that's a start.Copy !req
182. - Skipper!Copy !req
183. Help!Copy !req
184. - Mort, did you just have
the audacityCopy !req
185. to kick your stinking foot
into the sacred templeCopy !req
186. of my royal buttocks?Copy !req
187. Well, keep doing it.
Go, go!Copy !req
188. - Yes, kick me, Mort.Copy !req
189. Harder.Copy !req
190. Do the left one.Copy !req
191. And now the right one.Copy !req
192. Keep them coming,
it's working.Copy !req
193. Yes!
Ouch.Copy !req
194. Yes!
Ow. Wait.Copy !req
195. That last one kind of hurt
a little bit.Copy !req
196. - Huh?Copy !req
197. - Of course, it's the salt.Copy !req
198. The sodium granules released
from the pretzel cartCopy !req
199. into the convective cloud layerCopy !req
200. must have sparked
a freezing nucleation reaction.Copy !req
201. And, boom, instant rain.Copy !req
202. - Sky spirits, thank you.Copy !req
203. Ow.Copy !req
204. Thank you for this wonderf—
ow.Copy !req
205. Mort, you can stop
kicking me now.Copy !req
206. Mort?Copy !req
207. Mort!Copy !req
208. Hello?Copy !req
209. Maurice, will you get
this maniac off my booty?Copy !req
210. - Well, well, well.Copy !req
211. Looks like I'm finally going
to get my payback.Copy !req
212. - Sorry, loser "X",
but no sale.Copy !req
213. - Ahhhh!Copy !req
214. - Ha! Zinger.
Gotcha.Copy !req
215. - Home again, home again.Copy !req
216. - Well, Skipper, I'd say
mission accomplished.Copy !req
217. - Yup.Copy !req
218. And did you catch
my "no sale" line?Copy !req
219. You know,
with the cash register?Copy !req
220. Not a bad way to end.Copy !req
221. - Positive I.D. on deli owner.Copy !req
222. Approaching refrigerator.Copy !req
223. - And?
- And?Copy !req
224. - Fish?
- We have day-old tuna salad.Copy !req
225. He's off to the storeroom.Copy !req
226. Definitely a dump job.Copy !req
227. - I can't believe
people just throw away old tuna.Copy !req
228. I mean, what is salmonella
anyway?Copy !req
229. - I believe it's Italian
for "little salmon."Copy !req
230. - Ah, taste of the old country.Copy !req
231. - Mamma mia che vo sape.Copy !req
232. - Kowalski,
tuna extraction options.Copy !req
233. - That skylight
is our entry point.Copy !req
234. I suggest the parasail,
quick and silent.Copy !req
235. - Oh.
- Ugh!Copy !req
236. - With a slight chanceCopy !req
237. of dancing
the high-voltage cha-cha.Copy !req
238. - Whoa!
Ch—Copy !req
239. Ah!Copy !req
240. What?Copy !req
241. Maybe that's just how I fly,
all right?Copy !req
242. - Is that really
the safest approach?Copy !req
243. - No.Copy !req
244. But using wind and velocity
calculations,Copy !req
245. I've determined
the ideal body shapeCopy !req
246. for clear parasailing.Copy !req
247. - Release, Private!Copy !req
248. Fly, you magnificent beast!Copy !req
249. Whoa!
Whoa!Copy !req
250. Whoa!Copy !req
251. I made it!Copy !req
252. - He's clear.
All right. Oh, yes.Copy !req
253. - Approaching skylight.Copy !req
254. This is the greatest thrill
of my life.Copy !req
255. - He missed it.Copy !req
256. - No tuna?Copy !req
257. I mean, Private's in danger?Copy !req
258. - No, he's descending safely
next door.Copy !req
259. Kowalski, what's on the left
of the deli?Copy !req
260. - I believe that would be
Madame Hilda's training schoolCopy !req
261. for bad-tempered Rottweilers.Copy !req
262. - Uh-oh.Copy !req
263. - Oh, my.
How did you get down there?Copy !req
264. Never mind.
Come, come.Copy !req
265. Let's have a look at you.Copy !req
266. - Ow!
Ow!Copy !req
267. Big ow!Copy !req
268. - Just bumps and bruises.Copy !req
269. Don't worry, little one.Copy !req
270. My new intern
will take good care of you.Copy !req
271. Shawna, your first patient
is ready.Copy !req
272. - Look at you, soldier—Copy !req
273. freshly decorated
with combat souvenirs.Copy !req
274. Who cares if we didn't get
the tuna salad?Copy !req
275. - Uh... me?Copy !req
276. - Today you owned your pain
like a real man.Copy !req
277. - Sorry.
Seriously, couldn't be prouder.Copy !req
278. - Funny, I don't feel
very manly.Copy !req
279. - Knock, knock.Copy !req
280. Oh, my gosh. Aren't you just
the cutest thing ever?Copy !req
281. Gitchee-coo.Copy !req
282. Oh, does that tickle?
Does it?Copy !req
283. - You are so sweet.Copy !req
284. I wish this morning
would never end.Copy !req
285. - Okay, back to the habitat.Copy !req
286. - Shawna!Copy !req
287. - Hey!
What is it?Copy !req
288. Let go!Copy !req
289. This isn't a day spa, princess.Copy !req
290. No more owies, no more hospital.Copy !req
291. - Owies.Copy !req
292. Surprise!Copy !req
293. - You really
didn't have to do this.Copy !req
294. - Uh-cha-cha-cha-too-too.Copy !req
295. Anything our wounded hero wants.Copy !req
296. Today's your special day.Copy !req
297. Cake?Copy !req
298. - Well, actually,
what I'd really likeCopy !req
299. is another crack at parachuting
into the deli.Copy !req
300. You know,
get back on the horse,Copy !req
301. laugh in the face of danger,
and such.Copy !req
302. - Skipper?Copy !req
303. - Remember when I said
I couldn't be any prouder?Copy !req
304. I was wrong.
I was wrong!Copy !req
305. - Release velocity achieved.Copy !req
306. Go!Copy !req
307. - Skylight entry
in five... four... three...Copy !req
308. - For Shawna.Copy !req
309. - Uh, Kowalski?Copy !req
310. What's on the right side
of the deli?Copy !req
311. - I believe that would be
Gunnerson's houseCopy !req
312. of rusty bear traps.Copy !req
313. - Oh, boy.Copy !req
314. - Ow! Ow!Copy !req
315. - Aw, back already?Copy !req
316. Poor guy.Copy !req
317. You must be the unluckiest
animal in the zoo.Copy !req
318. - Funny, I feel like
the luckiest penguin alive.Copy !req
319. - All better.Copy !req
320. Now let's hope I don't
see you in here again.Copy !req
321. - No power on Earth
could keep me away.Copy !req
322. Surprise!Copy !req
323. - What, you made me
another cake?Copy !req
324. - Nope.Copy !req
325. - Oh.
Um, no, thanks.Copy !req
326. - You've earned some serious
relaxation time, solider.Copy !req
327. - I've got magazines.Copy !req
328. Ooh, ooh, this one has unicorns
and quilting.Copy !req
329. - Ooh! Any quilts with unicorns?Copy !req
330. Ah.Copy !req
331. No, no!Copy !req
332. I insist on another tuna salad
recovery mission.Copy !req
333. I shall conquerCopy !req
334. or get moderately injured
trying.Copy !req
335. - Private, are you sure you—Copy !req
336. - Don't feed the boy
your doubter's poison.Copy !req
337. He has got to pummel
this bad luck streakCopy !req
338. into submission.Copy !req
339. Any time you're ready.Copy !req
340. Private?Copy !req
341. - Now's good.Copy !req
342. - Ooh!Copy !req
343. Ow!
Oh!Copy !req
344. Guh!
Guh-ah!Copy !req
345. - Frankly, boys,
I'm starting to thinkCopy !req
346. Private's bad luck streak
may be unpummelable.Copy !req
347. - Egad!Copy !req
348. - I know.
Tough word, right?Copy !req
349. "Unpummelable."
Try it.Copy !req
350. - No, I mean egad!
Look at this.Copy !req
351. Private's harness was cut
before that last run.Copy !req
352. This is no bad luck streak.Copy !req
353. It's sabotage.Copy !req
354. - Sabotage?Copy !req
355. - Impossible.Copy !req
356. No one else had access
to that parasail.Copy !req
357. The saboteur would have to be
one of us.Copy !req
358. - One, two, three.
Not it!Copy !req
359. - Not it!
- What?Copy !req
360. - Ah, he admits his guilt.Copy !req
361. - Oh, no, I didn't.
You started it.Copy !req
362. - Hey, Private, did you know
Rico was secretly sabotaging—Copy !req
363. what in the name of corn-fed
candy stripers?Copy !req
364. - Seriously, is this, like,
the eighth time today?Copy !req
365. I'm going to call you
Mr. Butterflippers.Copy !req
366. - I guess I just must be
"accident prone."Copy !req
367. Air quotes.Copy !req
368. The mime of insincerity.Copy !req
369. He's lying!Copy !req
370. - Sorry, compadre.Copy !req
371. Looks like this was
an inside job—Copy !req
372. inside Private's own
puppy love-twisted brain.Copy !req
373. - Be right back.Copy !req
374. - Be right here,
sighing longingly.Copy !req
375. - Accident prone, Private?Copy !req
376. Oh, I've seen accident prone.Copy !req
377. Try Manfredi and Johnson
with a Chinese lantern...Copy !req
378. and six bottles
of rocket fuel!Copy !req
379. - Worst talent show ever.Copy !req
380. - All right, I admit it.Copy !req
381. I did it all to be with Shawna.Copy !req
382. But you don't understand.Copy !req
383. When Shawna bandages you,Copy !req
384. you're like an angel cake
being frosted by fairies.Copy !req
385. - Uh, what?Copy !req
386. - You know nothing of our love!Copy !req
387. - Oh, relax, young Private.Copy !req
388. Actually, we do understand.Copy !req
389. - You—you do?Copy !req
390. - Of course.Copy !req
391. Who hasn't gone stupid
for a lady?Copy !req
392. Guatemala?Copy !req
393. Doris the dolphin?Copy !req
394. Don't make me show everyone
the tattoo.Copy !req
395. Doris!Copy !req
396. - Now, the important thing
is to take a deep breath,Copy !req
397. realize you've gone too far,Copy !req
398. and snap out of it!Copy !req
399. - Yes, that does make
a lot of sense.Copy !req
400. No!
I'll never leave!Copy !req
401. Shawna's my destiny!Copy !req
402. Is this whyCopy !req
403. my sweet little guy's been
in the hospital so much?Copy !req
404. Are the other penguins
bullying you?Copy !req
405. - Don't... you... dare.Copy !req
406. - Easy.Copy !req
407. I'm not going to hurt you.Copy !req
408. - Sister, I'd like to see you—Copy !req
409. okay, the lady is not
without her charm.Copy !req
410. - Of course!Copy !req
411. Avian insanity fever.Copy !req
412. - Avian insanity?Copy !req
413. Pssh! Where'd she get
that crackpot diagnosis?Copy !req
414. - No problem.Copy !req
415. A simple injection
should mellow them out.Copy !req
416. - Needle!Copy !req
417. Afroogaloo!
Afroogaloogaloo!Copy !req
418. Keep fighting, boys.Copy !req
419. Viva la resistance!Copy !req
420. - Ow!Copy !req
421. - Ow!Copy !req
422. - Owie!Copy !req
423. - You call this mellow?Copy !req
424. Mama, I'm a pretty, pretty
butterfly.Copy !req
425. - Aw, don't worry, sweetie.Copy !req
426. You just say goodbye
to those bullies.Copy !req
427. You will never share a habitat
with them again.Copy !req
428. - Goodbye forever?Copy !req
429. But—but that's not what—
I didn't mean for—Copy !req
430. - It's okay, Private.Copy !req
431. All we want
is for you to be happy.Copy !req
432. - The thing is, Skipper,
without you three,Copy !req
433. I don't think I could be.Copy !req
434. Forgive me, Shawna,
for that which I must do.Copy !req
435. - So we'll start
quarantine procedures.Copy !req
436. Then—Copy !req
437. Okay, I'm just going
to put this mask back onCopy !req
438. and take a teensy little check
of—Copy !req
439. huh?Copy !req
440. You've got it too?Copy !req
441. And I've been touching you
all day?Copy !req
442. - Avian insanity!Copy !req
443. - "Only contagious
through saliva."Copy !req
444. Well, I didn't get
any of his spit on me.Copy !req
445. - Hello.Copy !req
446. - Ew!Copy !req
447. - I'm sorry, Skipper.Copy !req
448. - That was a noble sacrifice
you made, Private.Copy !req
449. Maybe it's just the medicine
talking.Copy !req
450. Are you naked?Copy !req
451. Oh, we're all naked.Copy !req
452. - Um, no.Copy !req
453. - Okay, it is the medicine.Copy !req
454. Anyway, forget what I said
before.Copy !req
455. This is the proudest
I've ever been.Copy !req
456. - She really was wonderful.Copy !req
457. - And that's why you never
beat yourself upCopy !req
458. over the ladies.Copy !req
459. Love has enough sting
of its own.Copy !req
460. - Almost forgot.Copy !req
461. - Ow!Copy !req
462. - Told ya.Copy !req