The Office 7x24

1. We could get Deangelo flowers.

2. No, you can't get flowers

3. for someone who's in a coma;

4. they'll wilt before he wakes up.

5. - Yeah, that's true. - Good point.

6. A week ago our boss hit his head trying to make a dunk.

7. He suffered severe head trauma,

8. which, due to what were only described to us

9. as poor decisions on Deangelo's part,

10. became a minor coma.

11. And then Gabe said he didn't want

12. any accountability for anything that happened

13. in this office, so now we don't have a manager,

14. which means making a decision has gotten... easier.

15. All in favor of the baskets full of chocolates,

16. teddy bears, and balloons.

17. Wait, wait. All in favor

18. of the knapsack filled with canned goods,

19. chainsaw, gasoline, and emergency radio

20. in case he wakes up post-apocalypse...

21. Nope. Baskets have it.

22. So as it turns out, unless you're a young child

23. or a prison inmate,

24. you don't need anyone supervising you.

25. People just come in

26. and do their work on their schedule.

27. Imagine that—people like us allowed to sell paper.

28. Unsupervised.

29. And yet, somehow it works.

30. It must be because the stakes are so high.

31. Well, I really appreciate the offer,

32. but I'm just happy the way things are.

33. Okay. Thank you.

34. That was Jo asking me if I wanted to take over

35. as acting manager while they find a replacement.

36. I told her...

37. I don't want to mess this up, right?

38. There's a consensus. People are happy.

39. Dwight Schrute.

40. Yes, I would.

41. Thank you.

42. Jordan.

43. Gather my things from my desk.

44. Wait...

45. What have you done?

46. Mose...

47. You'll never guess where I am right now.

48. Can't stay there all day.

49. I'm coming.

50. Do I at least get to go with you in this fantasy?

51. You'd slow me down.

52. Dwight has been acting manager for three months now.

53. No. A week.

54. Just feels like three months.

55. Let's see... we all have to punch into a time clock

56. which is very old, very strong,

57. and has a slot about the size of a finger.

58. We were all given new business cards

59. big enough to set us apart from the competition,

60. which is how I learned that our titles

61. are all now junior employee.

62. Our lunch breaks are staggered to prevent wasting time.

63. Mine's at 10:30, and I find

64. that the first hour of the day goes by a lot quicker

65. than the second seven hours.

66. Stop stalling.

67. Come on.

68. Oh.

69. Let's begin.

70. For ten years, I've been picturing this very moment.

71. And now that it's here,

72. it's exactly as I imagined.

73. This desk is an exact replica of Uday Hussein's desk.

74. I don't support his actions,

75. but we can't argue with his tastes.

76. And you try growing up with a father like that.

77. I did.

78. On a smaller scale.

79. This is a 3D wolf.

80. The samurai is the most mighty of warriors.

81. And this is a letter opener.

82. Or is it?

83. Dunder Mifflin!

84. It's a Beaumont-Adams.

85. It's over 120 years old.

86. Aka the Widow Maker.

87. Isn't he a cute piranha?

88. Come on, boy. Here you go.

89. I will never be happier than I am right now.

90. I will also never be less happy.

91. I will be at my current maximum happiness

92. for the rest of my life,

93. 'cause I am manager of the Scranton branch

94. of Dunder Mifflin.

95. Acting manager.

96. I pledge allegiance

97. to the flag of the United States of America

98. and to the republic for which it stands,

99. one nation, under God, indivisible,

100. with liberty and justice for all.

101. - For all. - Amen.

102. Excellent. Morning announcements.

103. There's been a problem with some people

104. sharing copier codes.

105. Your copier code is a distinct 21-digit number

106. that is unique to you and you only, okay?

107. Don't share it.

108. Jo Bennett, our CEO, will be here today

109. for a high-level meeting involving Gabe and myself.

110. Ooh. About what?

111. That's on a need-to-know basis.

112. I thought I needed to know for your calendar.

113. General meet and greet.

114. So I expect you to be on your best behavior,

115. which means none of you will be insubordinate

116. nor will you foment insurrection.

117. Question. If we've already fomented insurrection,

118. may we be grandfathered in?

119. Mm, define "foment."

120. You define "foment."

121. Please take note of the new color-coding system.

122. - Aha! - Oh, my God!

123. - What is wrong with you? - Gotcha! Why are you late?

124. It's none of your business, actually.

125. It's very medical and personal.

126. All right.

127. You stop me when I reach the diseased area.

128. I was signing up to audition for "American Idol."

129. I think I have a really good shot.

130. My only fear is that they say

131. you can't have talent representation,

132. and I do.

133. I have three clients— Kelly Kapoor

134. and these twins I found who are really hard to look at

135. but harder not to.

136. In fairness, Darryl did tell me that joke—

137. Oh! Darryl's funny.

138. - I know, right? - Hey, Andy?

139. - Yeah. - Um, can I talk to you

140. a second about these client memos?

141. Sure.

142. What's going on?

143. Are you still in love with Erin?

144. What?

145. Because I am.

146. I need to get her back. I can't be alone anymore.

147. Andy, do you like being alone with me right now?

148. No. This is horrifying.

149. No, I don't like being alone with me either, okay?

150. I have to get her back.

151. Are you still gonna date her?

152. We're just friends, okay?

153. Do you promise that?

154. Yeah, fine, I promise. We'll never date again.

155. Can we go outside now?

156. No. Just give me a second.

157. I don't want anyone to know I've been crying.

158. Erin's great, that doesn't mean I have to date her.

159. We're good friends.

160. Friends with benefits.

161. The benefit being good friendship.

162. Hey, hey, hey, hey, what do you think you're doing?

163. What's this? What's the Fist?

164. Oh, it's just a social club.

165. You know, like the French Revolution

166. or the Black Panthers or communism.

167. It's just a club. Guys talkin'. You know?

168. You expect me to believe

169. that you're starting a rebellion?

170. Mm, nope. A social club.

171. God, I hate when everybody calls us a rebellion.

172. Okay, you know what?

173. - I would love to join the Fist. - And we would love

174. to have you, but not today, unfortunately.

175. It's a bad day, what with Operation Overthrow

176. and everything, but I have noted it.

177. One...

178. Pam, I have to show you this video.

179. You're gonna love it. It's Beyoncé falling

180. with a fart mixed in.

181. I will convince Jo to make me permanent manager

182. by raising efficiency.

183. No conference room meetings, no Internet.

184. This is a high-powered cell-phone jammer

185. I got off the black market.

186. Although if I keep it too close to my genitals,

187. I could have children with freakish mutations

188. or powers.

189. Four.

190. One. Seven.

191. - One. - Another one?

192. - Yes! - Seven.

193. Could you turn the volume down on the beeping?

194. Two, six, nine. Shut up, Oscar. Eight.

195. - Nine first. Put the nine. - Nine.

196. - Eight. - Five.

197. - Thank you. - Three.

198. Zero, zero.

199. - Again. Zero. - Okay.

200. - Four, six. - Nice.

201. Two.

202. - Oh, I hit three. - One.

203. - I hit three instead of— - God!

204. No food now?

205. Someone has to do something about Dwight.

206. He put some snacks in the freezer for us.

207. You mean the frozen mice for the piranha?

208. No, the blueberry Slurpee pouch.

209. Hmm, he means the ice pack.

210. Well, maybe we should talk to Jo.

211. And say what? "Jo, Dwight won't let us

212. watch sneezing animal videos online anymore. Fire him"?

213. No, Pam. This is our life now.

214. Mindless drones working for a machine.

215. It's just like that movie—hmm.

216. What was that movie with that actor?

217. Oh, he's in that one big movie with that lady.

218. - With the lady? - And then—yeah.

219. And then one really huge movie

220. with that Black actor who's been in a bunch of things.

221. - He's Black? - No, no, no. He's not Black.

222. He's the one who... Oh, my God.

223. This is why we need the Internet.

224. I'm going bonkers. I can't—can't take it.

225. It's just a movie.

226. "The lady and the Black man."

227. Yeah.

228. 2:00 should probably be okay.

229. I can either take your number or—

230. I'm sorry. This can't wait.

231. He's just gonna call back.

232. Erin, I am in love with you.

233. I don't believe in much, okay?

234. I don't believe in horoscopes. I don't believe in Christmas.

235. Uh, uh, I sure as hell don't believe in God.

236. What?

237. - Or maybe there's a God. I don't— - I don't know.

238. I mean, it's just not a guy with a long white beard.

239. Or it could be. I mean, it's possible that

240. that is exactly what—what God is.

241. But for all of the disbelief...

242. I believe in us.

243. I believe in love.

244. You have made me believe

245. that for all of the hokum out there—

246. Uh, do we not have voicemail?

247. Dwight doesn't trust robots to give us our messages.

248. Well... it's just...

249. It messes up my rhythm.

250. But...

251. I'm taking a break from dating.

252. Gabe was a great guy with so many wonderful qualities,

253. but it was a challenge being touched by him.

254. Wow, you've really embraced

255. the whole "Bon" villain aesthetic.

256. Ah, Jim, Jim, Jim.

257. The gun is a Beaumont-Adams. Jo collects them.

258. I thought we could have some nice small talk about it.

259. And the piranha's a rescue.

260. And the desk.

261. The desk is a replica of Uday Hussein's desk.

262. I saw a picture in Newsweek.

263. Listen, I'm a very busy man.

264. Let's get right down to business.

265. - Okay. - Jo is coming later today.

266. I cannot have a subordinate

267. trying to make me look stupid, okay?

268. I need you to promise me

269. that you'll be on your best behavior.

270. I promis... ed other people

271. that I'd be on my worst behavior.

272. And I gave 'em my word, so...

273. Don't make me fire you.

274. You can't fire me. You're acting manager.

275. Not office manager. So you have no firing powers.

276. Don't make me pre-fire you.

277. You wouldn't dare.

278. Watch this. You're pre-fired.

279. And when I'm promoted, you'll be full-fired.

280. If you get promoted,

281. and if you haven't fallen in love with me by then.

282. What?

283. If I had thought that there was a real chance

284. that Dwight would be permanent manager,

285. I would have pre-quit.

286. And you might be saying to yourself,

287. "Well, that's pretty premature to think," but I always say

288. "It's better to be pre-pre-preprepared."

289. - How you doing, Jordan? - I'm good.

290. Everyone here thinks that you're a joke.

291. They think that you were hired

292. because of your good looks, which won't last long anyway.

293. As your pale skin and severe bone structure imply,

294. you'll age swiftly and poorly.

295. They think that you're a little bit stuck-up,

296. a little bit dim, kind of aloof,

297. and have a freakishly deep voice.

298. Why are you telling me this?

299. 'Cause I want us to be able to tell each other anything.

300. So now I want you to find out

301. what people are saying about me.

302. The guy who hired me told me to just sit there

303. and look pretty.

304. It's not that hard in this office.

305. Your mission is to go out there

306. and find out things they don't want me to know ab—

307. It's a holster.

308. Yep. Yep, yep, yep.

309. Lookin' good.

310. Mm.

311. Oh, what a day. What a day.

312. Dwight, are you carrying a gun?

313. The holster was a gift from my great-uncle Honk.

314. Um, I don't know.

315. I guess he's saying that he's proud of me.

316. Dwight, guns make me really uncomfortable.

317. The gun is just an accessory to the holster, okay?

318. I can't walk around wearing an empty holster.

319. Why do you need to wear the holster at all?

320. Why do you need to keep wearing those booby shirts

321. - all the time? - Thank you.

322. You could put your cell phone in it instead.

323. Uh, hello!

324. You could put a banana in it.

325. Why would I put a banana in my holster?

326. In case you weren't hungry now

327. but you got hungry later.

328. Dwight, no gun, okay?

329. Don't make us call Jo.

330. Okay, all right, fine. Everyone calm down.

331. Someone get me a banana.

332. Sorry I freaked you guys out—

333. Andy!

334. Aah! God!

335. - Are you— - It's so loud!

336. My God.

337. There is a hardwood floor underneath this carpeting.

338. Why would they do that?

339. There's like this crazy ringing going on.

340. I can't—

341. I can't find perfect C.

342. Okay, everyone make a list of what's lost for the insurance.

343. I lost a necklace, a ring, painting—

344. We should call 911.

345. Good luck getting them to this neighborhood.

346. Okay. No, no, no, no, no. Don't call the cops.

347. Everyone just needs to calm down.

348. Dwight!

349. Stop waving the gun around when you say that.

350. - Here. - Hey, what happened?

351. Dwight went on a shooting spree,

352. and then he shot Andy in the head.

353. No, no, no.

354. All we know is that a gun fired.

355. That's all we know! No. That's not true.

356. Actually, we heard a loud noise.

357. Later, a hole was seen.

358. No one saw the bullet leave the gun.

359. Something's definitely wrong.

360. I'll look on WebMD. What are your symptoms?

361. Oh, everybody, Oscar found a reason to look on WebMD.

362. Firewall.

363. I can't reach Jo.

364. She must already be on the plane.

365. Okay. Why are you calling Jo?

366. She needs to know that there has been

367. a shooting spree in this office.

368. Okay, everyone is being way too liberal

369. with the use of the word "spree."

370. I think I should go to the hospital.

371. - I'll go with you. - No!

372. We really shouldn't be without a receptionist.

373. Now more than ever.

374. I'll take him.

375. Thank you, Darryl.

376. What's wrong with you?

377. - It's my ear. - Yeah.

378. Yes, sir.

379. Oh, I should get the accident report binder.

380. I've never used the gun violence forms before.

381. I'm gonna keep trying Jo.

382. Okay, everyone— Conference room!

383. Right now!

384. I would rather Jo not find out about this.

385. It wouldn't help convince her to make me permanent manager

386. and it might even be a negative against me.

387. Yee-haw!

388. Whoo-hoo!

389. Howdy, partners.

390. It's me, gun-safety Dwight.

391. And I'm the rootin'est—

392. I can't do this. Um, look.

393. Obviously, a gun went off under my watch,

394. and I'm launching a full investigation.

395. We all saw you do it.

396. Really? You did?

397. What hand was I holding the gun in?

398. What did Andy's tie look like?

399. Navy blue. Little red anchors.

400. I have no way of knowing if that's true.

401. I am supposed to collect eyewitness accounts.

402. Who saw Dwight do this?

403. Okay, really?

404. Okay, I fired the gun.

405. It was an accident. I'm sorry. But you all know me.

406. And how many of you actually feel uncomfortable

407. working with me?

408. Due to the shooting.

409. No, I wouldn't say I actually feel unsafe around Dwight.

410. Hell, Creed is more likely to kill me than Dwight is.

411. Yeah, he's right.

412. Would you consider this a terrorist incident?

413. - I felt terrorized. - Come on.

414. Oh, there's a whole nother terrorism booklet for that.

415. I just really, really think

416. that we should handle this internally.

417. Dwight, why is it on us to protect you?

418. Because you guys are my best friends,

419. and I mean that.

420. Managing you for this last week

421. has been the greatest honor of my life.

422. And if you ruin this,

423. I will burn this office to the ground.

424. And I mean that figuratively. Not literally.

425. Because you guys are so...

426. So important to me.

427. I love you guys.

428. But don't cross me.

429. But you're the best.

430. - Hey, Jim. - Hey.

431. Whatcha doing?

432. Just trying to process this invoice by 3:00.

433. What you doing?

434. I am making a list for Dwight

435. on what everyone's secretly up to.

436. No, you're not. 'Cause I'm doin' that.

437. Don't you have a deadline?

438. Well, it's not all about deadlines, Jordan.

439. Does "gorilla" have two R's?

440. The animal or the soldiers?

441. Both, actually.

442. It was kind of a downer helping Dwight move Uday's desk

443. into his office, but, you know, I just figured

444. it's not that long until I help him move it out.

445. And whatever happens in between

446. I'll just try to treat as entertainment.

447. - Hey. You okay? - Hey.

448. Yeah, I'm just worried about Andy.

449. Oh, yeah, with the...

450. Hope he can still have kids.

451. You know, I've been watching all those Pixar movies

452. that you always wanted us to see,

453. and if you shut off your critical thinking,

454. they're not half bad.

455. Mm.

456. Wouldn't it be funny if when we left at night

457. all the office supplies came alive?

458. So, like, the highlighter and the stapler

459. were best friends, right?

460. High and Stape...

461. And, um, uh, the shredder would be a murderer,

462. and he'd kill paper, but the paper couldn't move,

463. because it was stationary.

464. Do you feel better?

465. Yeah, thanks.

466. That is the kind of stuff

467. that you could expect from me from now on.

468. Neon nose.

469. Hey, everybody.

470. I brought Entenmann's.

471. Put these out somewhere.

472. Also I understand that the Internet

473. has been malfunctioning, and I want you to know

474. that I have fixed it, so enjoy.

475. It was Keanu Reeves.

476. It was... Yeah.

477. Toby got bitten by a spider,

478. but he seems stronger than ever.

479. Keep tabs on that.

480. Phyllis was selling a bunch of beet futures.

481. - Did she say why? - No.

482. Oscar was on some geological website

483. checking into the seismic pressure

484. under the building, which had increased to a 39.5.

485. 39.5?

486. Is that a problem?

487. Oh, gee, I don't know.

488. Is a megavolcano a problem?

489. God! This day!

490. Okay, there's one guy in the office

491. who's pretty funny.

492. Hey.

493. - We're back. - There he is!

494. Our hero! Oh, you look fantastic.

495. How you doing? Here. Tell us your war stories.

496. Well, I burst my eardrum.

497. Doctor said it could take weeks to heal.

498. Did they say what caused it?

499. 'Cause I know you like putting Q-tips deep

500. into your ear canal.

501. Yeah.

502. How's your hearing?

503. Temporary deafness in one ear.

504. It was both ears.

505. I couldn't hear a thing Darryl was saying

506. when we were in the waiting room.

507. I was talking like this...

508. I don't feel good about it,

509. but he just kept calling himself a gunshot victim,

510. and it got to me.

511. That bullet would've gone right through my head

512. if it was six inches to the right...

513. And five feet higher.

514. Dwight, I would like tomorrow off

515. so that I can go on my "American Idol" audition.

516. - "American Idol"? What? No. - Okay.

517. I guess I can just not go.

518. - Do you guys wanna hear my solo? - No.

519. Okay, fine. You can go on your singing audition.

520. Okay, well, then I want an extra vacation day.

521. Pet Day. I want Pet Day back—no dogs.

522. Put back everything

523. in the vending machine except the fruit.

524. I put everything back in the vending machine.

525. Put everything back in the vending machine

526. except the fruit.

527. When negotiating, the general rule

528. is not to cave.

529. But since when have I ever played by the rules?

530. Deangelo was gonna have the company pay

531. for my business school.

532. I expect you to honor that promise.

533. I told you I would teach you everything you need to know.

534. No, it's just not the same.

535. I want a new nameplate. A brand-new nameplate.

536. I don't feel safe here anymore.

537. I wanna start telecommuting from home.

538. It's a safety issue.

539. Fine.

540. I want your eyes.

541. What?

542. Not now, after you're dead.

543. Dwight has the most beautiful eyes.

544. Fine, you can have my eyes.

545. I hereby bequeath my eyes to Creed upon my death.

546. You are all witnesses. Now is everyone happy?

547. You have to get rid of all your weapons.

548. All of them, including killer fish.

549. He's a rescue.

550. Okay.

551. Oh, it's my turn?

552. Ooh, I'm on the spot. I don't know.

553. Um... you know what? I think I'm good.

554. - Thank God. - No.

555. When Jo's here, can you work in "shagadelic, baby,"

556. at least three times in a conversation?

557. Oh, and when I cough, can you do jazz hands?

558. What's jazz hands?

559. Fine.

560. It's not like he did it on purpose.

561. And he did once pepper-spray Roy to protect you.

562. Okay, so we're gonna give the guy who shot up the office

563. a free pass, just because he's less violent

564. than the goon you were engaged to?

565. Roy was a lot smarter than Katy, though.

566. Okay, how did this become about that?

567. Lenny, it's a stepping stone.

568. I wanna get your career to a place where you don't have

569. to ride identical twin scooters with Betty, but we're not—

570. - You can't just— - But we're not there yet.

571. Close the door.

572. Well, my definition of "demeaning"

573. is very different...

574. What the is that?

575. Oh, my...

576. Hey, all!

577. Cornelius, Bobo, have at it.

578. Nobody let my dogs hump each other.

579. They don't seem to know they're brothers.

580. Hello, Jo. Welcome.

581. - Well, shall we begin? - Slow yourself down there.

582. Just like a man— Wants to jump right into it

583. while I still got my socks on.

584. Jim Halpert—the only man to ever turned me down.

585. Well, I don't know about that.

586. Just wasn't for me.

587. But let me assure you,

588. Dwight is firing on all cylinders, right?

589. Yeah, some pretty big shoes to fill.

590. I was sorry to hear about Deangelo.

591. He was a good man. It was tragic.

592. Well, what can you do? Life.

593. What happened to you?

594. Well, bee flew in my ear,

595. and then I jabbed a fork in my ear to get the bee.

596. Oh, be careful with yourself.

597. Where's my favorite? Where's Angela hidin'?

598. - I'm not hiding. - Girl, you are very small.

599. It's fun to look at you so small.

600. Dwight, grab my stuff, will ya?

601. And where's Gabe?

602. Tell him I want some coffee.

603. You okay there?

604. Shagadelic, baby.

605. - We have to clean this up now. - She had so much blood—

606. - Hey, guys. - Hey.

607. Hope I'm not interrupting anything.

608. No!

609. Hey, Andy, did you tell Erin about our conversation earlier

610. when you said you would never want to date her again?

611. Uh...

612. I just thought that it was so interesting

613. that you promised that.

614. Did I say that earlier?

615. Uh, yes, I did.

616. Because you, Gabe, were crying...

617. - No, I was not. - And sobbing uncontrollably.

618. Yes. Uh-huh. You were in hysterics.

619. And my maternal instincts kicked in.

620. Is it actually how I feel?

621. Yes.

622. Or no.

623. That is... Between me and my diary.

624. Oscar, can you print out last year's sale statements?

625. - Sure. - Hey, Dwight.

626. - Gimme a back massage. - No, Kevin, come on.

627. My back is sore, Dwight. Massage it.

628. Kevin, not now.

629. - Hey, Jo... - Okay, okay.

630. No. Under the jacket.

631. You're kidding me.

632. Oh, God, what am I touching? It's moist.

633. - I don't feel anything. - Oh, it's so wet.

634. - Push harder, Dwight. - I can't.

635. I can't push harder!

636. - Go a little higher. - I—

637. There.

638. There you go. Nope. Higher.

639. I c—

640. Higher.

641. - Oh, my God! - There we go. Okay.

642. - How's that? - Knead it.

643. Knead it like a pizza.

644. - I'm kneading it! - But don't eat it.

645. Okay...

646. Dwight, walk me out.

647. Oop.

648. Let's talk soon.

649. And stay on top of these people.

650. You gotta admit it—

651. It's nice to have a little power, eh?

652. How's it feel?

653. Jo...

654. I accidentally fired a gun in the office today.

655. - What? - I am telling you this

656. because I care too much about this job

657. to be blackmailed into doing it poorly.

658. All I've ever wanted is to be manager here.

659. And if you feel like you cannot promote me

660. over this one accident, I understand.

661. But if you think that extortion is worse—

662. Shooting is worse. Are you kiddin' me?

663. It's not even in the same—

664. You shot a gun?

665. What is wrong with you?

666. It was a Beaumont-Adams, if that helps.

667. Beaumont-Adams is a girl's gun.

668. That just makes it plain stupid.

669. I take full responsibility.

670. Who else would be responsible?

671. Pam made me put a banana in my holster.

672. - You shot a gun off— - Okay.

673. Did I make a mistake? Yes.

674. Do I regret the decision that I made? Yes.

675. Stop asking yourself easy questions

676. so you can look like a genius.

677. - Got it. - I love you, Dwight.

678. But you don't fit this job.

679. Jo, please...

680. - No. - I will—

681. No, child. No.

682. It's over.

683. Now I gotta find a replacement for my replacement.

684. First idiot follows some ding-dong to Denver.

685. Next idiot dunks himself to death.

686. My new idiot almost kills all the rest of these idiots.

687. You know who I think would do a good job?

688. A no-nonsense fella from China.

689. Oh, who am I kiddin'?

690. A billion Chinese, and I'd find the one idiot.

691. "You charm me with a smile, a wink"

692. "and make me laugh like 'Monsters Inc.'

693. "We'll go and eat some ratatouille.

694. "I sure hope it's not too chewy.

695. "I'm Nemo in the great blue seas.

696. I'm Woody. Be my Jessie, please?"

697. - Gabe. - Please go out with me again.

698. Please. Please?

699. I'm sorry that I said you spend too much money on stickers.

700. No, Gabe.

701. I'll take you to a water park.

702. - They scare me, but I'll do it. - No.

703. Gabe, I just have to be single right now.

704. You're gonna be lonely, and you will be scared at night.

705. The world is terrifying.

706. Then I'll call Andy.

707. What if Andy's not around?

708. I don't know.

709. I'll call you or the police.

710. Okay. I understand.

711. Okay.

712. What a relief. Finally, some closure.

713. You three are my search committee.

714. You're in charge of finding me my next manager.

715. All righty?

716. - Yep. - Yep.

717. Till then, we need a new actin' manager.

718. Now, who's got the most experience in this office?

719. Uh, well, we probably don't wanna go just on seniority.

720. Who is it?

721. Hey, Dwight. What's up?

722. Shut up.

723. Okay. Well... You do know that Jo was right

724. to take the job away from you, right?

725. There's no debating that.

726. But I will say...

727. In your one week,

728. every single one of the orders went out on time...

729. And I think

730. that is shagadelic, baby.

731. The note is right here.

732. Ugh.

733. Kelly, I'm telling you,

734. you should really go for the train-wreck angle.

735. I don't know if I've ever seen anyone barf

736. during an audition before.

737. I'm sorry, no. Train wreck is actually more competitive.

738. All I'm hearing is this, like, gurgling blood sound.

739. That's what you sound like.

740. That is because there's gurgling blood in your ear.

741. - You are the worst vocal coach. - Do it like this.

742. - Kelly! Kelly! - Okay, okay.

743. It really feels wrong.

744. Andy's spot-on. He's got it.

745. Thank you.

746. That's—that's feeling better.

747. Spot-on. Spot-on.

748. - That's how you do it. - And that feels better.

749. I honestly could not tell the difference.

750. I'm not one of those music producers

751. who is all about the notes and the pitch and the chords.

752. I—they both sounded fine to me.