The Office 7x21

1. - Fire! Fire! - Ah!

2. Let's go. No, no, no.

3. There's no fire. Let's just go.

4. It is 6:00 a.m.

5. And Deangelo and I are about to go house to house

6. to give everybody their Dundies nomination certificate,

7. - just like the Oscars. - Yes.

8. And this happens every year?

9. - Every year this happens. - Okay, every year.

10. You have a lot to learn, my friend.

11. Well, you know, why don't we try it,

12. and if it goes— If it goes good,

13. it'll be part of my tradition.

14. Why are you even saying that? You're gonna love it.

15. Your hair's funky. You have bedhead.

16. - I do? - Yes.

17. - Sorry. - Use your fingers like a comb.

18. How did it get—

19. I shower at night.

20. - Ah. - I take my shower at night.

21. Here we go.

22. This way, this way.

23. Nice house.

24. - Surprise! - Congratulations!

25. Yep.

26. You and Pam have both been nominated

27. for Dundie awards.

28. Okay.

29. - Rawr! - There we go.

30. - Have Pam come down. - No, no, no, she's not here.

31. - Okay, I'm gonna get— - What's going on?

32. Stay in bed.

33. - Congratulations. - Stanley, we love you.

34. Have you lost your mind?

35. Get off my property before I call the police.

36. - All right, we got it. - Okay.

37. - Good. - Leave it at the door?

38. - Yeah, that's fine. - Okay.

39. Hey, Toby, you suck!

40. Is this an employee of ours?

41. - Why did y— - Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!

42. Is that part of the Dundies?

43. What the hell?

44. - Gosh. - I've never seen this place

45. in the daylight.

46. This reminds me of Katrina.

47. Here we go.

48. All right.

49. Got it? Are we set?

50. Hello?

51. - Oh. - Uh-oh.

52. I'm so busted. Walk of shame.

53. Do you—do you usually leave your door unlocked and ajar?

54. Oh!

55. Nice! I got a Dundie nomination.

56. - Yes, you did. - Yes, that's right.

57. - Wow! - No big deal.

58. - Congratulations, Meredith. - All right.

59. Well, we should head out.

60. No, no, no, you gotta stay.

61. No, no, no, I have Vienna sausages,

62. and I have napkins.

63. Let me fix you breakfast.

64. I'm not going in there.

65. Go. Go.

66. Good morning, Erin.

67. Oh, hey, didn't see you.

68. Any big plans for tonight?

69. I don't know.

70. Maybe volunteer at the women's shelter,

71. go to bed.

72. Or, I don't know,

73. maybe I'm going to the Dundies!

74. Whoo!

75. You are getting so funny.

76. Very good.

77. This is it. This is my final Dundies.

78. And part of me is devastated.

79. But here's the thing.

80. All great performers take the comedy,

81. and they blend it with something more serious.

82. David Letterman, for example.

83. Stupid Pet Tricks.

84. "Oh, I'm having a heart attack."

85. I'm Velcro-ed to a wall.

86. Someone's extorting me.

87. Will It Float?

88. I have a stalker.

89. Makes for excellent television.

90. For those of us who have never experienced

91. a Dundies awards show, um,

92. I thought it'd be a great idea

93. to have Michael say a few words.

94. Well, the Dundies are a magical night,

95. and not just because we recognize fellow employees,

96. but because people fall in love.

97. - Hm. - That's where Jim and Pam

98. first kissed.

99. It's where Pam got drunk and fell off a barstool.

100. That's right. That is true.

101. That is true.

102. Anything can happen at the Dundies.

103. They're like the Golden Globes but less mean.

104. And I just want us to all have a good time.

105. Just a little announcement, folks.

106. Remember, the Dundies is a black-tie affair.

107. Black tie optional.

108. Every day is black tie optional.

109. FYI, tonight we will be hosting at Louie Volpe's.

110. - Nice. - I love their breadsticks.

111. Oh, their breadsticks are like crack.

112. I love when people say "like crack"

113. who have obviously never done crack.

114. Well, their breadsticks are like what then, Ryan?

115. - What can I use? - I don't know,

116. something from your world.

117. "The breadsticks are like scrapbooking."

118. - "The breadsticks—" - You're right, you're right.

119. No, I'm a middle-class fraud.

120. Shh, shh. Okay, okay, okay.

121. Everybody's right.

122. They're like breadsticks on steroids.

123. - Right? - Yeah, that's great.

124. So as you know, the Dundies are my legacy.

125. So I'm going to need to train a replacement.

126. So this year I have decided to have a co-host.

127. And that person is...

128. Deangelo.

129. Always the Padawan, never the Jedi.

130. Thank you, Michael,

131. uh, but I will have to pass.

132. Think of it as part of your training.

133. I'm not much of a performer,

134. unless you count singing in the shower.

135. Boy, okay.

136. Okay, well, we'll work on it.

137. Look, I'm very, very bad.

138. - Very bad. - You're doing it.

139. The Dundies are my baby,

140. and they need to go on.

141. When Larry King died,

142. they didn't just cancel his show.

143. They got Piers Morgan to come in and do his show,

144. and that way Larry lives on.

145. Guys, I want you to help us work on some banter.

146. - Yes! I love banter. - Good.

147. But I hate witty banter.

148. Here we go.

149. So, Deangelo, you and I have a lot in common.

150. - You lost 200 pounds... - Mm-hmm.

151. And I lose my car keys every morning.

152. That is true.

153. We do share some similarities.

154. I know how you can fix one of those problems.

155. For me, it was portion control.

156. For you, you need a key chain.

157. - Maybe hang it on the— - Okay, okay.

158. You know what? I didn't actually lose my keys.

159. - Okay, so this did not happen? - Mm-kay.

160. There needs to be what you call a rat-a-tat.

161. And right now it's all rat and no tat.

162. Ryan, come on up here.

163. - Deangelo, if you would just— - Can I—

164. - Want to tap Deangelo out. - 'Cause if I could see it—

165. Just watch us. Okay.

166. Ryan, how are you today?

167. Why don't you ask my therapist?

168. My mom certainly pays her enough.

169. There you go!

170. Lovely. Regis and Kelly.

171. Nice. Use that as an inspiration.

172. - Perfect. - Okay.

173. Perfect.

174. Hey, everyone. Welcome to the Dundies.

175. Keep in mind, there were absolutely no crocodiles harmed

176. in the making of tonight's awards show.

177. - "Crocodile Dundee." - Okay.

178. That's from the major motion picture,

179. - "Crocodile Dundee." - Shh. You know what?

180. Don't try to be funny. Just be funny.

181. Think about it.

182. Overthink it, even.

183. And then you know you can do it.

184. Uh, okay. Hey, uh, you, sir.

185. - We having fun tonight? - Having a great time.

186. - Oh, good, good. - Thanks, yeah.

187. Where were you on September 11th?

188. No. Gosh.

189. - Whoa. - No, no. Stop, stop.

190. - What? - This is so weird.

191. If I'm conducting a meeting, good to go.

192. But if I think of it as a performance,

193. I-I fall apart, obviously.

194. Why don't you think of hosting the Dundies

195. like you're just running a meeting?

196. No, no, no.

197. This is the performance of your life.

198. This is not a meeting.

199. If this isn't a meeting, I'm not here.

200. It is a meeting for you. Sit down.

201. Deangelo, why don't you just privately,

202. in your own head, think of it like a meeting?

203. Jim, please, no loopholes.

204. Mike, why do you have to control

205. how he perceives it in his mind?

206. This is my last Dundies ever.

207. If I want mind control over him,

208. is that too much to ask?

209. Hey, Deangelo, why are you so bad at this?

210. You're a very good manager.

211. Am I? Am I even a good manager?

212. You know you are.

213. I'm so rattled right now.

214. I can't even look at these people.

215. Look at them. You need to do it.

216. - I can't look at them. - Yes, you can do this.

217. Boo!

218. Boo! This is so boring.

219. - Shut it, Dwight. - Hey, people will heckle.

220. It's gonna happen, okay? It's part of the landscape.

221. Boo! The emcees are stupid.

222. They're so fat.

223. And they're so disloyal.

224. Boo!

225. Be more loyal.

226. Can we go, Deangelo, please?

227. We have a mandatory party tonight anyway—

228. No, you can absolutely not go.

229. - Yes, yes, they should go. - Thank you.

230. - They should go. Please. - Meeting adjourned.

231. Go back to work. It's okay.

232. Angelo, I'm gonna stay for a while.

233. Okay.

234. Me, mo, me,

235. - mo, moo. - Good. Good.

236. - Good. Good. - Me, mo—

237. Now tell me something terrible

238. that happened in your childhood.

239. When I was very young,

240. my mother divorced my father,

241. and I had to go to court and choose between them.

242. Okay, too personal.

243. I don't wanna hear about that stuff.

244. Let's try this. Put this on.

245. I am going to turn this on

246. and turn the volume all the way up...

247. So you can't—that's right.

248. You're not going to be able to hear yourself.

249. Read this, and it's going to sound perfect.

250. "The Dundies are com—

251. "All about coming together

252. "and recognizing the indomitability

253. of the human spirit!"

254. Say it with an accent!

255. "The Dund—the Dundies—"

256. - "The Dundies!" - "The Dundie—"

257. I just don't understand the desire

258. to push sweet potato fries on me.

259. I just want regular fries.

260. Yeah.

261. Oh!

262. Hey, Erin, everything okay?

263. Get away from the car. He's gonna see you.

264. - Who's gonna see us? - Just get in, get in.

265. Just get in.

266. Get in the car?

267. Please! Sorry.

268. Get in.

269. - I'm— - I'm sorry. Sorry, sorry.

270. What's wrong?

271. I eat lunch in the car now.

272. It's my alone time.

273. It's just nice to have some time away from Gabe.

274. Why don't you want to eat lunch with your boyfriend?

275. I really don't like spending time with him.

276. Don't you think it's better to tell him the truth now,

277. you know, rather than waste more of his time?

278. I think I'm gonna go.

279. - What? - I think you got this.

280. - Okay. - Okay?

281. - Yeah. - All right?

282. - Okay. - Feel better.

283. Thank you, Jim.

284. I'm sorry, that...

285. Just wasn't interesting to me.

286. I can't just dump him, Pam.

287. I'm not like you. I can't be mean.

288. Wait, when am I—

289. You just have to be clear and firm.

290. You know, just tell him you don't love him.

291. Just be honest with him.

292. Pshh. Barely appropriate.

293. Awful.

294. - Hi— - Appalling.

295. Eyesore.

296. Surprisingly adequate.

297. Okay, everyone, please take your seats.

298. The festivities commence in four seconds.

299. A new low.

300. Oh, you've gotta be kidding me.

301. So how you feeling?

302. Feel good? You look very handsome.

303. I feel nauseated.

304. Deangelo, Jo's on the phone for you.

305. Hello?

306. Deangelo, we're in serious horse manure here.

307. The Dundies are tonight, and we ain't got no host.

308. Oh, no!

309. Luckily, I have someone for you.

310. - Billy Crystal? - Better.

311. Neil Patrick Harris?

312. He's in "Little Shop of Horrors" on Broadway.

313. - Right. - No, we need Michael Scott,

314. the best darn Dundies host both sides of the Mississippi.

315. - Where do I find him? - I don't know.

316. Ask your staff, you big dummy.

317. I gotta find Michael Scott.

318. Hm, and then I gotta...

319. Get him to the Dundies!

320. Hey, accounting, I need to find Michael Scott.

321. You should ask Angela,

322. 'cause she knows everything.

323. Hey, can you help me find Michael Scott, Angela?

324. My boyfriend can.

325. He's a state senator.

326. - Mm-hmm. - Oh, no, he can't help,

327. because that title has no meaning.

328. I did some of the writing.

329. Hey, Gabe.

330. Uh, hi, Deangelo.

331. Can you help me find Michael?

332. Or is this gonna be a bunch of bureaucratic,

333. wishy-washy, Sabre-loving BS?

334. Sabre signs our check.

335. So it will be a bunch of BS.

336. Jim, do you know where I can find Michael Scott?

337. Oh, I totally don't know where Michael is, dude.

338. Hey, you want to listen to some records?

339. Hey, Pam.

340. What's that, Jim?

341. What are we gonna have for dinner tonight?

342. Whatever you want, babe.

343. How about some casserole?

344. No one's listening to me! I'm running out of time.

345. What— What are you talking about?

346. I've fallen and I can't get up.

347. Maybe I just need to look into my heart.

348. Righteous. Look into your heart.

349. Look into your heart.

350. Yes, look into your heart.

351. Deangelo,

352. where is Michael Scott?

353. I'm here.

354. In a good way.

355. I've been here the whole time.

356. Now go to our office.

357. It seems like it has meaning, but it has none.

358. The analytical part of me wants to examine it.

359. But I know it has no content.

360. None.

361. And yet—

362. - Michael! - Yes, my son.

363. We have to host the Dundies.

364. Then what are we doing here?

365. Let's haul ass.

366. Agh, this damn elevator.

367. Let's go!

368. Which one do I pick? Is it that one?

369. - Uh-uh. - No. Is it this one?

370. - No. It's that one! - That's it.

371. Ladies and gentlemen, please stand up

372. for your co-host of the evening,

373. Michael Gary Scott.

374. Please remain standing for your other co-host

375. and new manager,

376. Deangelo Jeremitrius Vickers!

377. Is that part of the—

378. Deangelo.

379. Hey.

380. Deangelo, what are you doing?

381. There's a live audience out there.

382. Just go do it by yourself, or g-get Ryan.

383. No, Ryan would never do it. It's too on the radar.

384. Look, look.

385. The boss hosts the Dundies.

386. It's sort of our perk.

387. This was not part of the job description.

388. Okay, listen to me.

389. You're not doing this for me.

390. You're not doing this for you.

391. You're not even doing this for them.

392. What am I doing it for?

393. You're doing it for all those kids out there

394. eating off the Louie Volpe's kids' menu,

395. who are wondering, does it get better?

396. It was 1968.

397. Robert Kennedy had just been assassinated.

398. And I was at the Ground Round with my mom and my stepdad.

399. And this guy, this drunk guy just started dancing around,

400. doing the twist to no music,

401. and I started laughing.

402. I laughed so hard.

403. Funniest night of my life.

404. Eh—well, obviously bittersweet.

405. What I want you to do is I want you to say,

406. "It's showtime."

407. Get out there.

408. I can't.

409. - Say it. - Stop hitting me.

410. You can do it. Just say it.

411. Hit me again.

412. Now hit me.

413. One, two, three.

414. - It's showtime. - All right, here we go.

415. Okay, okay, sorry about the delay, everybody.

416. But we were at the DMV waiting in line.

417. Fall asleep right after sex, huh, guys?

418. Nope. Go back to the script.

419. There are a lot of great salesmen in this office.

420. But one of our great salesmen is also a great dad,

421. and a close personal friend of mine.

422. Jim Halpert,

423. - Best Dad Dundie! - Best Dad.

424. Wow. I do not parent for the awards,

425. but I gotta tell you, it feels pretty good.

426. Um, Cece, if you're watching this at home,

427. it's way past your bedtime.

428. By the way, how did this get televised?

429. Thanks.

430. - Well done. - I don't know,

431. maybe being a good dad is just following your own compass.

432. I don't know. I don't know.

433. - Thank you. - Okay.

434. Didn't think to mention me, huh?

435. - Didn't I? - No.

436. Okay, I finally get it

437. why people forget to thank their significant others

438. at awards shows.

439. Because the adrenaline just hits you,

440. and it's blinding.

441. Which moves us to Best Mom Dundie.

442. This person, well, I guess we all sort of consider a mom

443. around the office— Meredith Palmer!

444. Oh, my God.

445. Say what?

446. Tell you one thing,

447. I'm not gonna be a good mom tonight.

448. Whoo!

449. Excuse me. Can I get a photo

450. of the Best Mom and the Best Dad, please?

451. Step on up.

452. Well, I gotta go do this.

453. Why?

454. Let's go, big smiles, folks. There they are.

455. Year after year, I catch a lot of flak

456. on this particular award,

457. because year after year, I present this award

458. to a guy instead of a girl.

459. Hottest in the Office goes to...

460. Danny Cordray!

461. How do I feel about not winning

462. Hottest in the Office this year?

463. Um, I'm very relieved.

464. How do you—how do you judge something like that?

465. What is his criteria even?

466. It's—it's so subjective.

467. Danny could not be here tonight to accept his award,

468. so he is live via satellite.

469. Oh, Danny, are you there?

470. Hey, you guys.

471. I wish I could be there in person

472. to accept this Dundie award.

473. Uh, Michael came to my house and gave it to me in person.

474. - Oh, there he is. - Hey, everybody.

475. Hey, Michael!

476. Hey!

477. Oh. Here.

478. Uh, it's very nice of you, really.

479. Where are you gonna put that?

480. - I don't know. - I think you should put it

481. right here on the piano.

482. Well...

483. Isn't he good-looking?

484. Yeah.

485. - That's, uh— - Look at him.

486. Look at how good-looking that guy is.

487. It's—it's already pretty embarrassing, Michael.

488. - No way. - But thanks.

489. - Anyway— - I wouldn't be embarrassed.

490. Uh, appreciate you stopping by.

491. Us studs have to stay together.

492. I mean...

493. What are you doing for the rest of the day?

494. Uh...

495. Stanley Hudson is a grump.

496. Everybody knows that.

497. But did you know that Stanley Hudson is also

498. the face of a debilitating disease

499. known as diabetes?

500. The Diabetes award goes to Stanley Hudson!

501. Come on up here, you sick bastard.

502. I have diabetes too.

503. You don't see me making a big deal about it.

504. They say he's going to be my right-hand man.

505. Ad-lib masturbation joke.

506. Nope.

507. I hate this. I hate it so much.

508. Dwight Schrute, please accept

509. this Promising Assistant Manager Dundie.

510. Thank you. Thanks so much.

511. Um, I want to dedicate this award

512. to something that, uh,

513. we take for granted in our daily lives.

514. And that is the humble trash can.

515. This is for you, trash can.

516. Deangelo, what is beautiful?

517. Someone young?

518. Someone thin with a great body?

519. Is it someone that we like to look at,

520. is really hot and sexy?

521. What if someone were none of those things?

522. Could they still be considered beautiful?

523. Well, I say they can.

524. I am most proud to give this next award,

525. which says more about me than about her, in a way.

526. Mm.

527. The Redefining Beauty award goes to Phyllis Vance!

528. Give it up.

529. Th-this is for all the real women out there.

530. - Yeah. - Whoo!

531. - Whoo! - You go, girl!

532. Oh, yeah.

533. Way to go, Phyllis.

534. You go, girl!

535. Oh. This is very funny.

536. This is a laugh riot.

537. But you know what? I don't care

538. if you think I'm "kind of a bitch."

539. I'm also kind of dating a senator

540. and kind of the happiest I've ever been.

541. Sorry, Angela.

542. I think it's going pretty well.

543. Same crap, different Dundies.

544. Yeah, Deangelo is great, but he's a little green.

545. Gonna need you to keep an eye on him in the future there.

546. You can count on me.

547. That's what I do, keep the boss on track.

548. Thank you, Dwight.

549. Yes, master. You're welcome, master.

550. Anything for you, master.

551. Oh, man, this has been such a good year

552. for women in paper, am I right?

553. Come on, guys.

554. Give ourselves a hand, women in paper.

555. This is pretty awesome.

556. So I-I don't know why I'm up here and you're not.

557. I don't know how I could have beaten you to get this,

558. but I'm just gonna take it, so thank you so much, you guys.

559. Who gave you those crayons?

560. I brought them from home.

561. Do you have a red?

562. This is a cloth tablecloth.

563. You can't color on it.

564. Oh, really?

565. Did you know herpes affects

566. one out of every five sexually active adults?

567. Pippi Longstocking, Ronald McDonald's wife,

568. Ron Howard, Ron Weasley.

569. What do they all have in common?

570. Redheads.

571. And Erin Hannon...

572. Come on up here to receive

573. your Cutest Redhead in the Office award!

574. That is bull!

575. Thank you! Thank you!

576. Thank you!

577. This is the first award I've ever won in my entire life.

578. People were right about the Dundies.

579. They are magical.

580. But I don't feel it,

581. and I think that's because I'm not with the right person.

582. Gabe...

583. What?

584. We should break up.

585. What?

586. I'm not attracted to you.

587. - I just— - I cringe when you talk.

588. I have to be honest.

589. Right? Right, Pam?

590. Thank you for hearing me.

591. Okay, well, this is embarrassing.

592. Um, I'm obviously really angry at Erin.

593. Here comes that quarter-life crisis

594. everyone's talking about.

595. All right, I'm gonna— I'm gonna go.

596. Wait, h-hold—hold on.

597. Real quick while we have— Have you up here,

598. let's get you your Dundie...

599. Mm, mm, mm, mm.

600. Which is the—

601. I'm s—this is not appropriate.

602. Uh, Ichabod Crane award.

603. - Thank you. - You're welcome.

604. Let's—there you go.

605. Damn, that was cold.

606. So cold.

607. And speaking of, your food is cold.

608. Can I have it?

609. I'm really good at segues.

610. It is difficult to recognize

611. the person who will be replacing you.

612. But he is a good guy.

613. So the Michael Scott award for Best Dundies Host

614. goes to Deangelo Vickers.

615. Speech! Speech! Speech!

616. Hold on. Hold on one second.

617. Okay. Crank it.

618. Ow.

619. - I want to— - I want— I feel truly blessed,

620. uh, to be working with all of you.

621. You know, before this all started,

622. uh, funny story, I was in the bathroom,

623. vomiting and vomiting in that men's room.

624. - Okay. - That's why it's been shut

625. - down for most of the evening. - That's it.

626. This is important. He's expressing himself.

627. - Hosts don't get Dundies. - No.

628. This—this is...

629. - No. Just let— - Truly special for me.

630. And, uh,

631. - anyway, it's so much lighter— - Okay, we're done.

632. That's it.

633. - Michael, are we—what? - We're done. We're done.

634. So that is how it ends.

635. My last Dundies ever.

636. I was hoping it would be more like "Godfather III"

637. that wrapped up the whole franchise

638. in an extremely satisfying way.

639. But instead, it is like "Godfather I"

640. that was very confusing,

641. had maybe three big laughs.

642. Oh, well.

643. Hey, Michael.

644. We were thinking maybe we could keep this thing going.

645. - What? - Yeah.

646. I mean, some— Some people didn't win awards.

647. That's kind of lame.

648. Yeah, what am I gonna tell my daughter

649. when I come home without a Dundie?

650. Oh, Daddy didn't distinguish himself at his work.

651. Daddy's invisible in The Man's world.

652. Yeah, that's a bummer.

653. Trust me, I know a little thing or two

654. - about being a great dad. - Okay.

655. Seriously?

656. You guys want to keep this thing going?

657. I know I'm the cause of this royal screwup,

658. but I would like to see the show go on.

659. No, no.

660. You're being too hard on yourself.

661. We had a very truncated rehearsal time.

662. Let's grab some ice cream, go back to the office,

663. - and finish what we started. - Yeah.

664. So what you're saying is, you kinda liked it?

665. I've fallen and I can't get up!

666. That Phyllis bit, that was pretty good, right?

667. I don't know that we need to dissect it all right now—

668. - But that got a big laugh. - It did.

669. That actually got a big laugh.

670. We were laughing, right?

671. Oh, you know what, I have to go to the bathroom—

672. Don't worry. We're really close.

673. You know, I can just run over to the gas station there.

674. We should just wait here

675. and not get good seats in the conference room?

676. That's true. We wouldn't get seats together.

677. Okay, yeah, I'll hold it. I'm fine.

678. You know, despite a couple hiccups,

679. I thought that went very well.

680. I thought it was the worst Dundies I've ever been to.

681. Man.

682. Maybe you should have won the Kind of a Bitch award.

683. Oh, gladly, I'd accept that award,

684. because a bitch is a female dog.

685. - Okay. - What? What are you doing?

686. - Ah. - What—

687. Whew.

688. Please don't stop so suddenly.

689. Seat belt's pressing on my bladder.

690. Why are you even wearing a seat belt?

691. You're sitting in the back seat, baby.

692. - What is your problem? - I just don't see the point

693. of the Dundies, okay?

694. The jokes are terrible, the venue was bad,

695. - the fashion was boring. - Okay, that—

696. That is unfair.

697. The clothing was safe but tasteful.

698. And next time, why don't you pick a co-host

699. that doesn't have microphone-aphobia.

700. Look, whatever you're going to do,

701. how long is it gonna take, ballpark?

702. - 'Cause I just— - I've gotta make a decision here.

703. He—he is in an all-out sprint.

704. Please, excuse me.

705. There is someone here

706. who has transformed himself at this company.

707. He started as a hunk of coal,

708. and he has turned into a diamond—

709. A black diamond,

710. which are the most precious.

711. The Movin' On Up award goes to Darryl Philbin.

712. Uh, thank you.

713. Thank you. Thanks, Mike.

714. This is, uh, kind of offensive, but I appreciate it.

715. - You're welcome. - Congrats.

716. - Congratulations. - Yeah.

717. Well done.

718. Hey.

719. What are you doing out here?

720. I was so mean to Gabe.

721. And I feel really bad, and...

722. I don't know, I refill the machine

723. to take my mind off stuff.

724. - Really? - Yeah.

725. - Well, you di— - I mean, you did it all wrong, so...

726. - No, I didn't. - I'm afraid you did.

727. I'm gonna need you to try it again.

728. I want you to do better this time.

729. No.

730. Not even close.

731. Do it again. Focus.

732. Almost?

733. - Close. - Andy, Erin.

734. Here—okay.

735. By his own admission,

736. this person actually tried marijuana in college,

737. so the Doobie Doobie Pothead Stoner of the Year award

738. goes to Andy Bernard!

739. Okay.

740. Yes!

741. Aw.

742. There's a lot of people I'd like to thank.

743. But I think we all actually want to thank you, Michael.

744. Oh. Thank you.

745. I mean, we actually really all want to thank you

746. for everything.

747. Oh, my God, something's happening.

748. We've been practicing every day after work

749. in the warehouse.

750. We just thought it would be a nice thing to do.

751. I'm not a good performer.

752. But I can sing like a angel.

753. Yeah, okay.

754. Well, this is gonna hurt like a mother.

755. Every day, millions of Americans suffer

756. from extreme repulsiveness.

757. Someone in our midst is bringing that problem to light.

758. Toby Flenderson...

759. Please come up here and accept

760. the Extreme Repulsiveness award.

761. Oh, that's so mean.

762. - I don't— - I don't— - No, it's fine.

763. It's his last Dundies.

764. You gotta play along, man.

765. Come on, Toby.

766. Here he comes!

767. All right. You deserved it.

768. I really disagree with this.

769. I think it's kind of hateful.

770. Although I am a little happy right now

771. to have a platform to talk about the outcome

772. of a case that I was recently a juror on:

773. the Scranton Strangler.

774. A man's being put to death.

775. I was part of the verdict,

776. and I'm not so sure he's guilty anymore.

777. - Oh, yeah. - Chicka chicka.