The Newsroom 1x2

1. Where's my staff?

2. We're gonna try Elliot out at 10:00.

3. He's taking your EP and your EP's taking your staff.

4. - Wait, you asked to leave? - I did.

5. - I hired you a new EP. - You're not talking about Mackenzie.

6. - I had to right the ship. - I tried to get in touch with you

7. a lot of times in the last three years.

8. - Did you get all those emails? - I didn't read them.

9. - James Harper, this is Maggie— - Margaret Jordan— Maggie's fine.

10. I need Don Keefer to help me through this transition.

11. It turns out Don's dating Maggie.

12. He's going to be threatened by you,

13. so he'll try to impress Maggie, who's staying with Will.

14. You understand?

15. There's been an explosion off the coast of Louisiana.

16. You've got to ask her why there's no contingency.

17. Why are we drilling three miles underwater

18. when we don't have the technology

19. to fix the world's most predictable emergency?

20. Good to see you again, Will.

21. You didn't bring her in to right the ship.

22. You brought her in to build a new one.

23. Tess Westin, AP.

24. Yes.

25. Gary Cooper.

26. Can that really be his name?

27. Yes. Desk producer.

28. Tamara Hart, AP.

29. I'm on fire.

30. New neighbors.

31. Okay.

32. - Morning. - Big day.

33. Can I talk to you a second?

34. - We've got a rundown meeting. - Yeah.

35. - They're very young out there. - I know.

36. But what they lack in experience,

37. they make up for in inexperience.

38. - Mac— - It's an asset.

39. - They don't know how to do the news badly yet. - Or really at all.

40. Some of them will be doing things

41. so you're going to go easy on them.

42. We talked about this last night

43. and for three hours the night before

44. and again at 4:00 AM this morning.

45. And you're sure you don't wanna lead with the spill?

46. - I am. Is that what you wanted to talk about? - No.

47. I think most people here know that you and I were together a while ago.

48. I think so, too.

49. - I don't want anyone to know why we're not together now. - Sure.

50. - I mean no one. - You think I'm gonna talk about it?

51. I find it hard to predict what you will and won't do.

52. - I won't be telling anyone. - As long as we're straight.

53. - We are. - No one. Nothing.

54. Just to be clear, you want me

55. - to tell some people, but not everyone. - Let's go.

56. You're going to have nine minutes with Jan Brewer, nine minutes with La Raza.

57. I wanna go on record saying we should open with the spill.

58. - Done. - We'll open with the spill?

59. No, but you're on record saying you think we should.

60. The spill is all anyone's talking about.

61. Because we're the ones telling them to.

62. We're still reporting on it, just not at the top.

63. I'm looking at film of an oil rig sinking into the ocean.

64. That's pretty good television.

65. We don't do good television, we do the news.

66. - Good morning. - Good morning.

67. And welcome to the first pitch meeting of "News Night" 2.0.

68. The chaos of the spill is settling down

69. and we get to do our first real show.

70. 11:00, I hear the pitches;

71. 4:00, the show starts to look like the show;

72. and 6:00, we lock it in.

73. I learned everyone's names last night.

74. A huge step in the right direction.

75. We'll be opening tonight with SB 1070,

76. the Arizona immigration bill,

77. which Will supports, by the way.

78. You all thought he was a closet liberal

79. when, really, he's a closet moron.

80. I'm not a closet anything.

81. Seriously, I know everyone's name.

82. I was up half the night learning to pronounce Calanasia Zbrezniak.

83. Cally doesn't work here anymore.

84. - Dianastasia Jorma? - Nope.

85. Mohammed al Mohammed el Mohammed bin Bazir?

86. - Went to Fox. - Fox hired someone with three Mohammeds in their name?

87. But let's give him a hand for effort.

88. Shut up!

89. - Is your name really Gary Cooper? - Yeah.

90. What is "News Night" 2.0?

91. - This is— - Mac, the—

92. Right. Thank you.

93. Before we get to 2.0, I'm supposed to read

94. something from IT and I don't want to forget.

95. "New aliases have been set up for in-house e-mails.

96. Autocomplete has been enabled on your Outlook."

97. Anybody know what that meant?

98. Right.

99. "Asterisk-interns" or "asterisk-staff"--

100. an asterisk makes it go to a group.

101. No asterisk makes it go to an individual.

102. Your name is Neelamani Sampat.

103. - Nailed it. - Neal's fine.

104. Can you say it one more time?

105. Just type an e-mail to someone.

106. Okay, I'm sending an e-mail to Will.

107. I'm typing it. I'm still typing it.

108. - What are you doing now? - Still typing.

109. And I'm sending it.

110. It's all right. You made two mistakes.

111. You used an asterisk, and instead of typing W for "Will,"

112. - you typed S for "staff." - They're close together on the keyboard.

113. "Will McAvoy's a closet bigot who hates immigrants

114. even though this country was founded by immigrants."

115. - Everybody get the same thing? - Yep.

116. No one in this newsroom's job

117. is being threatened by an undocumented worker.

118. Here we go. This is "News Night" 2.0.

119. Sorry!

120. - Excuse me, Charlie? - Yeah.

121. You wanted to see me?

122. A 12-year-old kid in Topeka is trying to convince me

123. he's got a pair of jacks in the hole.

124. - Shouldn't he be in school? - He is in school.

125. - How can I help you? - Hang on.

126. He really did have jacks in the hole.

127. Is there a way I can tell his parents?

128. - I'm a little busy. - Sure.

129. You know how you have a secret meeting with Will

130. every day to talk about numbers?

131. - I— we don't have a secret meeting. - Yeah, you do.

132. - You meet with him in private and you tell him exactly— - I do it at his request.

133. - It's very instructive. - It is.

134. - It's invaluable. - Yeah.

135. I want you to stop.

136. Don't break down the numbers for him for a little while.

137. Can I ask why?

138. We're trying something new

139. and I don't want him getting cold feet.

140. - He listens to you. - He should.

141. But what do you mean you're trying something new?

142. We're going to try doing the news, see what happens.

143. I don't get it.

144. There are two important conversations—

145. how do we do the best news possible

146. and how do we get the most people to watch?

147. I don't want one of those conversations

148. to have anything to do with the other—

149. You don't want ratings to drive content.

150. - Exactly. - Neither do I.

151. - I want content to drive ratings. - That's the hope.

152. But for the moment, I don't want ratings in Will's head at all.

153. I'd be able to tell him you spiked

154. close to 75,000 new viewers since you broke your story.

155. - That's 10% in four days. - Yeah.

156. In addition to the haul he brought in

157. after he went crazy at Northwestern.

158. - He didn't go crazy. - I'd be able to tell him

159. that 32% of those are in the demo...

160. - Reese. - and 44% make over 75K,

161. which means we can charge more for 15 and 30s

162. and get out of the wheelchair- selling business.

163. And what does he do with that information?

164. He stretches out the spill as long as he can.

165. - That's ratings driving content. - That's just reality.

166. - Reese. - No, I need to be able to do my job.

167. Just don't break down the numbers for Will.

168. We've never gotten along that well, have we?

169. Reese, don't break down the numbers for Will.

170. If I hid in a locked vault buried under the AWM building,

171. Will would find me so I could break down the numbers for him

172. because Will McAvoy is the biggest ratings whore in the business.

173. - I'm not the bad guy. - Nobody's the bad guy.

174. Though if you call Will a whore again,

175. I'm going to take out your teeth one punch at a time.

176. - Anything else? - No, sir.

177. This is a new show and there are new rules.

178. "Is this information we need in the voting booth?"

179. "Is this the best possible form of the argument?"

180. And three: "Is the story in historical context?"

181. You can use a mnemonic device.

182. I-I-I, the three Is.

183. - That's not really helpful. - I was gonna say.

184. - We're not opening with BP? - It'll go down in the D block. There's nothing new.

185. How about today's day four of the president not saying anything about it?

186. Would you get off the man's back?

187. Jesus Christ. I'm surprised you found room.

188. Gary, Kendra.

189. Gary is the smart black guy who's not afraid to criticize Obama.

190. Kendra got double 800s on her SATs, makes Gary crazy.

191. - I studied. - BP's going in the D block.

192. Jim.

193. SB 1070 passed the Arizona House last week

194. and a few days later passed the State Senate.

195. Its official name is the Support Our Law Enforcement and Safe Neighborhoods Act.

196. It requires immigrants carry their alien registration documents at all times,

197. requires police question people if there's reason to suspect

198. they're in the United States illegally,

199. and it targets those who hire illegal immigrants.

200. The governor signs the bill today.

201. Is it worth mentioning this is the same state that offered a bill

202. requiring presidential candidates to show

203. their birth certificates in order to get on the ballot?

204. In a courtroom, that would be called "prejudicial."

205. It would be called prejudicial anywhere.

206. Nope, not that kind of prejudicial.

207. We've got the governor for nine minutes.

208. - Just us. She's only talking to Will. - How'd you swing that?

209. - By telling her about "News Night" 2.0. - You showed her the easel?

210. I convinced her she's not going to have to outshout a crazy person.

211. That studio is a courtroom

212. and we only call expert witnesses.

213. Will is the attorney for both sides.

214. He examines the witness and reveals facts.

215. You will be amazed at the guests we'll book

216. using that unbelievably obvious template.

217. You don't have to raise your hand.

218. I saw one of those crazy militia guys on "Jon Stewart" last night.

219. - We could also have him on. - Did you hear me when I was speaking just then

220. or were you distracted by a bumblebee?

221. What does the I stand for?

222. The— the second I.

223. "Is this the best possible form of the argument?"

224. Not the most colorful version,

225. not the most outrageous version,

226. but the best possible version.

227. - How do you define "best"? - I define it by the source.

228. I define it by the number of relevant facts it contains,

229. and I define it by an X factor

230. that I trust Will and myself to determine,

231. using our combined five decades in the field.

232. What's the best possible version of the Birther argument?

233. There isn't one. And that's the fourth— ah!

234. This one's an A.

235. Are there really two sides to this story?

236. So it's I-I-I-A.

237. What does that mean, are there really—

238. The media is biased towards success and the media is biased towards fairness.

239. How can you be biased toward fairness?

240. There aren't two sides to every story.

241. Some stories have five sides, some only have one.

242. - You don't have to raise your hand. - I still don't under—

243. Biased toward fairness means that if the entire Congressional Republican Caucus

244. were to walk into the House and propose a resolution

245. stating that the earth was flat, the "Times" would lead

246. with "Democrats and Republicans Can't Agree on Shape of Earth."

247. Uh...

248. - Mac? - Would you let them raise their hands?

249. - Fine. - Back to immigration.

250. Neelamani Sampat. It means "blue jewel."

251. - I didn't know that. - I did. I took the time. I care.

252. - Are you asking him out? - If he wants me to. I'm nice.

253. - And what are you still doing here? - I was asked to help.

254. Don generously volunteered to help during the transition.

255. - He was asked or he volunteered? - I'm happy to go.

256. - Apologize. - I'm sorry.

257. - To Don. - I'm over it.

258. Neal.

259. There is an alternative weekly in Spokane

260. called the "Pacific Northwest Insider"

261. that published an article about immigration a couple of weeks ago.

262. The story featured a guy named Hector Nunez

263. who revealed that when he was 16,

264. his parents told him that he was living here illegally.

265. The paper used his real name?

266. Yeah, and the state of Washington rescinded

267. his driver's license after the piece came out.

268. He needs his car to get to his job with a small moving company

269. and to take his kids to school in the morning.

270. I thought we could have him on.

271. I've got to budget 42 minutes.

272. I've already spent 18 on Jan Brewer and La Raza.

273. I thought we could put a human face on immigration.

274. How about putting a human face on the guy whose job he took?

275. We don't have the time.

276. We've got 1070, BP, and a Senate candidate

277. who says poor people can pay doctors with chickens.

278. But even if we did have the time, it would be emotionally manipulative.

279. - How? - We'd be putting him there

280. so that we can feel sorry for him.

281. We should feel sorry for him. He's getting screwed.

282. You should feel sorry for the guy whose job he took.

283. I don't want to feel sorry for anybody.

284. I want the facts, and neither of them can provide facts.

285. - Somebody's gonna book this kid. - Nobody's gonna book him.

286. Nobody's gonna have heard of him.

287. It's an alternative weekly in Spokane.

288. And do you see "What's our competition doing?" on the easel?

289. - No, but I wish I did. - Moving on.

290. The Dow has ticked down 108 points

291. on a surprisingly weak durable-goods orders report

292. from the Commerce Department that has raised worries...

293. Listen, I'm not gonna take it from him in public or private.

294. - I'm doing you guys a favor. - I'm sorry.

295. I understand. And he knows that.

296. You're cutting "PopWatch" and "Today on YouTube"?

297. I am. And I know they're both yours, but—

298. I don't care that they're mine.

299. I care that they're the most popular segments on the show.

300. - Look at the minute to minutes. - Feel free to use them when you and Elliot start at 10:00.

301. Yeah, there's gonna be nobody left at 10:00 if you lead off the night

302. with the "Will McAvoy Makes You Eat Your Vegetables Hour."

303. - Hmm? - Forget it.

304. - Maggie. - Yeah.

305. Mac wants me to supervise your preinterview with Brewer's office.

306. - I was told. - All right, you're gonna be talking to a spokesperson.

307. - I'll call him now. - I thought maybe we could do a practice run first.

308. Okay, I'd like to say, with all respect,

309. that I don't feel I need to be supervised.

310. - Okay. - You'll let me do it by myself?

311. No, I just meant okay, I heard you say that.

312. I've been here a year. You've been here three days.

313. Mac's working with a group of relatively inexperienced people she doesn't know.

314. - I know that. - All right.

315. - So you'll let me do it myself? - No.

316. - Then I'm doing this under protest. - I'm sorry?

317. I'm just— I'll be— I'm doing this under protest.

318. - What does that look like? - It'll be the same.

319. I'm just lodging an official protest.

320. - With who? - My immediate superior, I guess.

321. - That's me. - Well, are you writing it down?

322. No. Are you really considering going to 10:00?

323. - Don made some compelling arguments. - Yeah? What were they?

324. That growing something from scratch is something I should experience.

325. - Okay. - Whoa, whoa, wait.

326. - What did that mean? - Nothing.

327. - Really? - Yeah.

328. I know exactly what you're thinking.

329. I can't say the same.

330. - You don't think I'm making a relationship choice? - No.

331. That this is just a temp gig for me

332. until someone puts a ring on it and I can have kids?

333. I wasn't saying— I didn't say any of that.

334. You don't think that I don't have the same commitment to news that you do?

335. No.

336. I'll be honest— because of the way I phrased those questions,

337. I wasn't totally clear on what your answers meant.

338. I think that you have the same commitment to the news that I do.

339. I think kids are great. I used to be one.

340. And I can't remember the third thing, but—

341. - Ring, ring. - Thank you.

342. - Ring, ring. - Hi, it's Glenn Fisher.

343. - Glenn Fisher? - Yes.

344. - That's the spokesperson I'm talking to? - Yes.

345. I thought it was John Markell.

346. Fisher's a press agent who's doing the preinterview.

347. Okay.

348. First, you go into iNews and you look over the questions

349. the segment producer put in the rundown.

350. Identify yourself and your news agency, summarize the segment—

351. the length, whether it's live or not,

352. and who we're having on from the other side.

353. I'm sorry, but don't I first open my eyes and notice it's a new day?

354. - What are we talking about here? - I've done this before.

355. - Okay. - What is this magic box in front of me?

356. Have I done something to you?

357. I swear I was just thinking the exact same thing.

358. I have no idea why I'm being mean to you.

359. Now that you know that, do you think you'll stop?

360. That's the thing— it doesn't feel like it.

361. I'm just being honest.

362. I can't ask for more than that, except rational thought.

363. - What was that? - Nothing.

364. - Ring, ring. - Hi, it's Glenn Fisher.

365. Glenn, this is Margaret Jordan.

366. I'm an associate producer at "News Night" and I'm doing the preinterview

367. for the governor's appearance this evening.

368. I know Will's gonna wanna ask why mean people

369. tend to pour into your state like it's a bathtub drain.

370. Will's not gonna wanna ask that.

371. I think they're building the fence on the wrong side of the state.

372. Margaret, here in Arizona, the government can barely pay

373. for the needs of native-born poor as it is—

374. welfare, education, Social Security—

375. especially when so many households here

376. are one or two paychecks away from the poverty line.

377. You're scapegoating these people.

378. Stop. I just said illegals cost money.

379. - Ask the follow-up. - Okay.

380. Ask it.

381. My follow-up, Mr. Fisher, is this—

382. I understand that having undocumented workers living in the US costs money

383. and it's a problem we have to do something about,

384. but shouldn't it be a point of pride for Americans

385. that others are willing to uproot their families just to come here?

386. The follow-up was "How much do they cost?"

387. But, yes, it is a point of pride that people wanna come to America

388. and we value our diverse population in Arizona,

389. but we just want people to immigrate legally and become citizens.

390. And I'm sure that's what's behind the emotion and the vitriol—

391. Americans hate it when people don't fill out the proper paperwork.

392. - You can't antagonize the— - I'm gonna ask the right questions, you dweeb!

393. - And you'll follow up? - I'll follow up.

394. My point is that whatever side of this you're on,

395. the rhetoric we use to talk about these people who risk their lives

396. to have a shot at picking oranges

397. so their kids have a shot at not being dead

398. makes it sound like we're talking about

399. scraping gum off our shoes.

400. These people chose to take a huge risk to become Americans

401. and they deserve a better descriptor than "illegals."

402. You don't need me. You got this one.

403. Thank you.

404. Another story making headlines this morning is, of course, Greece,

405. whose prime minister officially requested activation

406. of the EU/IMF bailout package,

407. lifting the euro from its lowest level of the year

408. and sending commodity prices soaring.

409. We'll have that and the rest of the day's financial news

410. on "Market Wrap-Up" at 4:00.

411. I'm Sloan Sabbith.

412. Let's go out to Diane and Billy on the West Coast

413. for Atlantis Hollywood.

414. And we're clear.

415. - Hello. - Sloan, I'm Mackenzie McHale.

416. - I know. It's good to meet you. - It's nice to meet you.

417. - Do you have a minute? - Sure. Thanks.

418. You know, I was watching you earlier when you were talking about

419. two companies— Capital One and, um—

420. - Baxter. - Baxter.

421. And the prompter said, "Both of whom are hinting at good numbers,"

422. and you said, "Both of which are hinting at good numbers."

423. - Was that an accident? - No. I didn't write that copy.

424. I changed it to "which" because "whom" is for people.

425. - Is someone in trouble? - No.

426. - Do you mind coming into my office for a second? - Sure.

427. What's the difference between a corporation and a person?

428. - Have you ever held a door open for someone? - Yes.

429. - Did you ask them for money first? - No.

430. - That's the difference. - That's the right answer.

431. - Am I taking a test? - I've asked around and people say

432. you don't belong here, that you could be making

433. a lot more money as an analyst at Goldman.

434. Couldn't you be making a lot more money producing reality television?

435. I do produce reality television.

436. I don't know what to tell you.

437. I like my job.

438. Do you feel like working longer hours?

439. They talked to me about doing a morning show

440. a couple of times, but I can't do that.

441. I'm not interested in cooking. I make sandwiches.

442. I get that I don't necessarily look like it, but I'm an economist.

443. - Thanks, though. - Yeah, I meant in prime time.

444. I want to give you five minutes every night

445. to talk about where we are and how we got here.

446. Are you serious?

447. There are people more qualified than I am.

448. I can put you in touch with some of the professors that I studied under—

449. Yeah, the thing is they're not going to have your legs.

450. I'm sorry, but if I'm going to get people to listen to an economics lesson,

451. I've got to find someone who doesn't look like George Bernard Shaw.

452. I would not ask you if I didn't think you were qualified.

453. You want me to do pole dancing while explaining subprime mortgages?

454. If you're up to it, sure.

455. All right, I get it.

456. We'll start a conversation with Will about our goals

457. - and how we're going to get there. - Great.

458. - I think you and I are going to be good friends. - I'd like that.

459. - Me, too. - Okay.

460. I mean it. I don't have any friends.

461. Oh.

462. You know, you're— you're new in town, so—

463. Yeah. Yeah.

464. - You know, you and I have something in common. - What's that?

465. - I had a boyfriend who cheated on me, too. - Ah.

466. - The week of our wedding. - Oh. Oh.

467. I don't understand.

468. - I know about Will. - Yeah. Yeah.

469. I still don't understand.

470. Wait, Will didn't cheat on me.

471. - I used to deny it, too. - Will didn't cheat on me.

472. - Oh, okay. Sorry. - I can't talk about what happened,

473. but I can tell you that Will didn't cheat on me.

474. - I shouldn't have mentioned anything. - Sloan, listen to me.

475. Will didn't cheat on me.

476. Yes, we were together for two years and we broke up.

477. I can't tell you any more than that, but he never, ever, never cheated on me.

478. - Who told you that? - Everybody.

479. That's what people— no, no, no.

480. That— that's not what happened.

481. - You don't have to tell me what happened. - I can't tell you.

482. He doesn't want anyone in the office to know. He made me promise.

483. No, not because—

484. I can't talk. Ugh!

485. Even though in this situation, I think he'd prefer—

486. no, he really doesn't want the office to know anything.

487. - He didn't cheat on me. - I should get back to work.

488. You need to tell people that.

489. You're enabling an ass.

490. He's— whoa.

491. He's not an ass.

492. Come here.

493. Will's not an ass. He's the opposite of an ass.

494. Even if he did cheat on me, which he absolutely didn't, he's definitely not an ass.

495. - Do people think that? - You had to have known that.

496. I thought they thought he was gruff, but lovable.

497. - No, they think he's an ass who cheated on you. - That has to be corrected.

498. - I have to start the 4:00. - Okay, okay, okay.

499. You need to do this—

500. you need to go from person to person and tell them

501. that Will is an extraordinary man

502. with a heart the size of a Range Rover,

503. that there's a— a long story that has to do—

504. a lot to do with me, but also other things.

505. I can't tell you the story of his life, but he's the good guy.

506. - Will you tell people that? - Every chance I get.

507. - You're not going to, right? - No, I'm not.

508. Okay.

509. - We spiked up 9% overall. - On top of the 7% that came after Northwestern.

510. You played high school football.

511. What do you do when you have a lead late in the game?

512. My high school never had to worry about that.

513. - You protect the lead. - Will McAvoy!

514. How do you get used to eating lunch at 4:00 in the afternoon?

515. I work from 11:00 to 9:00. It's across all demos, too.

516. Will McAvoy's the place to be for all things BP.

517. Hey, I need you to tell me right now

518. you're not using that as a promo slug.

519. We're not, but Brad ground-researched the hell out of this since Northwestern,

520. and the feedback we keep getting, especially from 18 to 49s,

521. is just studded with green flags.

522. And this isn't Brad selective-coding, man.

523. We're talking about an actual, bona fide, audience-driven response

524. to Northwestern and the way you handled the breaking news.

525. I don't see them capping the well anytime soon.

526. - But you're not leading with it. - Not tonight.

527. - It'll be down in the D block. - It sunk this morning.

528. We got film of a massive offshore drilling rig

529. sinking into the Gulf of Mexico.

530. We knew that was gonna happen.

531. People knew the Titanic was gonna sink when they went to the movie,

532. but it was cool to watch, which is why they went to the movie.

533. Partner, something's going on here and you gotta tell me what it is.

534. Look, we're trying to format a new broadcast

535. that puts a priority on information voters need,

536. puts the information in context, and then tries to present

537. the best possible versions of competing arguments.

538. Here's what I just heard— we got a hit show

539. that just got bigger, so now we're trying to fix it.

540. Listen, there's no one here but me and you.

541. Is this something you want or something you got talked into?

542. It's— no, it's something I want badly.

543. - I've wanted this since the dawn of time. - More than numbers?

544. Weren't you the one that told me that your audience are your only friends?

545. I said that after a couple of shots of some kind of varnish remover

546. at a particularly low point in my life.

547. - That was two weeks ago. - It was a very low point.

548. - I think it was lower than three weeks ago. - Will.

549. Mackenzie thinks I don't have to sacrifice one for the other.

550. Well, Mackenzie is the expert on predicting audience trends.

551. No, wait. She's not, Brad is.

552. - We're not setting out to lose viewers... - No one ever does.

553. just better news for the ones we've got.

554. All right, I'll stop.

555. Listen, I still want your advice every day.

556. My advice today: go to the conservative websites.

557. - I do. - You'll see that they like you.

558. They think you're a RINO, but they like that you don't

559. take cheap shots at Sarah Palin.

560. - Look at the comments section. - Yeah, I know.

561. Palin made a statement about the spill last night.

562. - It was ridiculous. - Yes, it was.

563. It'll be a joke on every late-night show.

564. She basically wrote Letterman's monologue.

565. - So you want my advice? - Yes.

566. Be the guy that doesn't take a shot at her tonight.

567. Well, I won't be taking a shot at her,

568. but that's because I won't be using her.

569. I'm saying you should use her, but not to take a shot—

570. No, she's a private citizen.

571. She doesn't have any qualifications in this area,

572. so it's hard with the new format to justify—

573. Let me tell you what it looks like when the audience leaves.

574. I can't jam in a Palin SOT just to give myself

575. the opportunity to not take a shot at her.

576. If I cross that line, I'm just saying, "Fuck the whole thing."

577. It looks like this: first you lose the people who just got here.

578. Then everyone writes that you lost the people that just got here.

579. That makes people think they're not at the cool party anymore.

580. You ever been at Sardi's on opening night of a Broadway show

581. five minutes after word gets out the "Times" panned it?

582. They leave.

583. And they never come back, ever.

584. And it happens in not much more time

585. than it just took me to describe it.

586. It's conservatives who watch the news on TV.

587. Don't pass up an opportunity to remind them why they don't hate you.

588. I really want to give the new format a—

589. Also, would you do me a favor and tell Charlie Skinner

590. that you're the one who asked for these meetings?

591. And do you want me to fix you up with someone

592. who'll take your mind off a girl from three years ago?

593. - No, thank you. - Palin.

594. - She's married. - Not to fix you up with.

595. - I'm saying use the Palin SOT. - I know. It's not gonna happen.

596. - Mackenzie would cook me and eat me. - You're the boss.

597. I'll keep reminding you of that because I'm not wild about your ex.

598. Hey, look, her name is Mackenzie or Miss McHale,

599. and she's reported more real news in one day

600. than I have in my career.

601. Fuck.

602. - Hi. - Hello.

603. Jan Brewer just bailed on us for tonight.

604. - What are you talking about? - They canceled.

605. - She's going on CNN. - Who— uh, who's she sending instead?

606. Maggie, no one from the governor's office is coming on the show.

607. - What happened with the call? - Oh, God.

608. - What happened? - This can't be because of the call.

609. - It happened on the call. - I swear, I kept my personal feelings to myself.

610. I was on the phone with Glenn Fisher

611. and it was really just by the book.

612. Okay, so the preinterview was going fine...

613. - Yeah. - when all of a sudden...?

614. Things happen, Jim, okay,

615. that are beyond your super-newsman powers of understanding.

616. I wish you had told me that you dated Glenn Fisher in college.

617. How could you possibly know that?

618. He told me, which is what you should have done.

619. I know, but I thought you'd take it away from me.

620. - I would have. - And that's why I didn't tell you.

621. You have to tell me. If you've had a relationship—

622. - It wasn't a relationship! We went out four times. - Maggie.

623. And now he's the press aide to the governor of a state

624. that gave us Barry Goldwater and a football team

625. that couldn't find the end zone with an OnStar system.

626. - You're a football fan? - No, I looked it up.

627. Also, the fourth date didn't count.

628. Is the fourth date relevant to the preinterview?

629. - It might be. - What happened on the fourth date?

630. We went back to his dorm room,

631. - we started making out a little. - Uh-huh.

632. And then there was a crazy banging on the door.

633. It was his ex-girlfriend and she was shouting,

634. "I know you've got some slut in there!"

635. - I think she meant me. - Yeah.

636. And Glenn said, "Get under the bed."

637. - Not the closet? - No room in the closet. It's a dorm.

638. So I got under the bed and he let his ex-girlfriend in,

639. and the two of them patched things up.

640. - With you under the bed. - Yeah.

641. When you say they patched things up...

642. - Yeah. - you're saying...

643. Oh, my God. They did it, Jim! Okay?

644. They settled their differences.

645. And it didn't take very long, because as it turns out,

646. - Glenn doesn't take very long. - Compared to who?

647. Compared to... other people

648. and what I've read about in the movies.

649. - It doesn't matter. - Five minutes?

650. I didn't have a stopwatch on him,

651. but I know it was under two minutes because I was holding my breath.

652. - Is this important? - I don't know what's important yet.

653. That's why I'm listening to this story.

654. They finished, they left.

655. - I waited a minute, and then I left. - Fast forward to the call.

656. He says the governor would also like to talk about Arizona doing well

657. on Obama's Race to the Finish initiative.

658. - And you say to Glenn...? - "How appropriate for you."

659. - Good one. - Thank you.

660. You said you didn't inject any of your personal opinions—

661. I didn't inject any personal opinions about the bill.

662. Okay, first of all, the initiative is called

663. Race to the Top, not Race to the Finish.

664. I know. That's why I was so sure God was on my side—

665. because He teed me up so perfectly.

666. - And second, why didn't he— - Why didn't he get her out of the room?

667. It was 2:00 in the morning. What was he gonna say?

668. "Why don't we go somewhere private and talk"?

669. They were in his dorm room. He was stuck.

670. - There were no options. - You had an option.

671. You could have not hidden under the bed.

672. I made a quick decision. It may have been the wrong one...

673. - "It may have been"-- - but once I made it, I had to commit to it.

674. And I will tell you something else.

675. He waited this long to tell us he was bailing on purpose

676. so we'd get slammed on getting a replacement.

677. - Do you think? - Are you being sarcastic?

678. Because, yes, I'm pretty sure he did this on purpose.

679. We've got less than 90 minutes to find someone

680. to defend SB 1070 and get them to a studio.

681. But after the show, a bunch of us are going over

682. to the Emerald City to see the Wizard—

683. - and maybe he can give you some— - My brain is fine.

684. You give me the SATs right now and I'll take them.

685. Maybe he'll give you some courage is what I was going to say.

686. Please!

687. Tell me what to do.

688. Grab some bookers, whoever's free, and come into the conference room.

689. - This is an emergency now. - We'll be right there.

690. - Maggie. - Yeah.

691. I don't know anyone in the world

692. who would have hidden under the bed.

693. Martin, Tamara, Kendra, I need some help.

694. - What do you need? - No, I can— it's no big deal.

695. I just need—

696. Kendra, Tamara, Martin!

697. - Everything all right? - I can fix it.

698. Okay.

699. What?

700. - What the hell is going on? - We lost Jan Brewer.

701. What? God!

702. Get someone else from Brewer's office.

703. - No, we've lost the whole office. - What?

704. - No one from Brewer's office is gonna be coming. - What the hell happened?

705. - This is my fault. - Look, I got into a stupid argument

706. with a press aide on the phone

707. and now he's giving the governor's office

708. to everybody but us so he can stick it to me.

709. Are you freaking kidding me?

710. - No, wait. Mac— - No. That is what happened.

711. Day side's been running Jan Brewer promos for the last six hours.

712. - Who's replacing her? - Well, we're obviously late to the buffet,

713. so we basically had to book people who were close to a satellite dish.

714. - Oh, boy. - Dr. Dwayne Sotter.

715. He's an adjunct professor at the University of Phoenix.

716. The University of Phoenix is an online university. It's not in Arizona.

717. - But you can understand our mistake, right? - No.

718. He's written several books on immigration policy.

719. - Have I heard of any of them? - They were self-published.

720. "This Land is My Land," "Ambushed,"

721. and "Don't Make Me Press One for English in My Own Country."

722. - That is quite a sacrifice. - Tamara.

723. We've got a former Miss Oklahoma

724. who was second runner-up in the Miss USA Pageant this year.

725. She claims she was denied first runner-up

726. because of an answer she gave regarding illegal immigration.

727. - Ah, the real victim. - Martin.

728. Right, the third is Ross Fernholm,

729. - a former state patrolman who was part... - Don't say it.

730. of a border control group called the "Citizens Militia."

731. Is this or isn't this the exact opposite

732. of who I asked you to book?

733. God damn it, Jim! What the hell were you—

734. - This is all— - All gonna be fine.

735. - Jim is taking the fall— - For exactly what I'm supposed to take the fall for.

736. I don't know what the hell dance you two are doing.

737. Don't book these guys. Scrap the segment.

738. They'll say we didn't have anyone defending it.

739. Let's prep them the best we can and have Will carry them, okay?

740. He'll just carry them.

741. I'll go and tell him.

742. - I should be the one to tell him. - Maggie—

743. - He's gonna fire somebody. - God knows he should.

744. - He will. - He won't.

745. He won't.

746. Guys, he won't.

747. Hang on.

748. Dome of silence. I have to—

749. Are people here under the impression that Will is an ass?

750. Okay, you're wrong. You know?

751. You're just wrong and it's an injustice.

752. He's— he'd throw himself in front of a train

753. for anyone in this—

754. - Is Will in his office? - He's at that thing uptown.

755. I'm sending him an e-mail because I— I can't

756. live with this stupid promise I made

757. and, you know, completely wrong information.

758. I'm nipping this thing in the bud right now.

759. And "send."

760. Will is the best man I've ever—

761. - What just happened? - I got a staff e-mail from you.

762. - Me, too. - I sent the e-mail to Sloan, I mean Will.

763. Ah. Oh, my God, I sent it to Sloan.

764. I think the S in "Sloan" became "staff."

765. You used the asterisk.

766. No.

767. No, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no!

768. Everybody listen! Listen to me right now.

769. - Oh, man. - Oh!

770. That was unusual.

771. I want everyone to delete the e-mail you just received.

772. Delete it right now without reading it. Honor system.

773. And then I need someone to sneak into Will's office

774. and delete the e-mail from his inbox.

775. If it's password-protected,

776. I need you to take a baseball bat and smash—

777. - You told me he was uptown. - I guess he came back.

778. - We stood in my office... - Will.

779. this morning, and I said under no circumstances

780. do I want anyone here to know what happened.

781. And you said yes, and yes again.

782. And it— it really—

783. it really seemed like you understood.

784. - And then you sent an e-mail... - It was a complete—

785. - explaining in some detail what happened. - Please, please let me—

786. And then you copied 47 reporters on it.

787. Can we go into your office?

788. You know how sometimes something happens in an instant

789. that's so astonishing you just shut down?

790. - Of course, that's underst— - That doesn't fucking happen to me!

791. - We need some privacy. - Really?

792. We're going to go into Will's office,

793. but I want everyone to delete the e-mail.

794. Mac, I think I just accidentally forwarded it to corporate.

795. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, hey, hey, hey.

796. - Why is this happening? - I was sending an e-mail to you,

797. but accidentally sent it to Sloan Sabbith,

798. but I either did or didn't type the asterisk

799. and it went to staff instead of Sloan.

800. Why were you sending it at all?

801. Because— and here's where I think I'm on firmer ground—

802. she thought that you cheated on me

803. and that you were an ass, which is not true.

804. I'm changing minds, Will.

805. I'm changing minds all over the place.

806. - Get in there! - Sure.

807. She thought you cheated on me and she told me other people thought so, too.

808. I couldn't take that, but I do take 100%

809. of the responsibility for what just happened.

810. Who else would be responsible?

811. Arizona prison stats.

812. - Thank you. - No one. I'm sorry.

813. - Don't mention it. - That's—

814. I'm really impressed that you're forgiving me so fast.

815. - I would have— - No, what you heard was, "Don't mention it.

816. It's no problem. Don't worry about it."

817. What I said was, "Don't mention it ever."

818. - Will— - Ever, Mac!

819. - Hospital costs and health care. - How current?

820. - Fiscal 2009. - Thank you.

821. I understand.

822. One more thing.

823. We lost Jan Brewer and had to replace her

824. with a crazy professor at a website, a member of the Citizens Militia,

825. and a former second runner-up in the Miss USA Pageant.

826. It's going to be fine. You'll carry them.

827. They'll barely have to speak.

828. Now you've shut down, right?

829. Ha ha.

830. Who fucked up?

831. - Now, you know I'm not going to tell you that. - Okay.

832. - 98%. - What?

833. I take 98% of the responsibility, not 100%.

834. Is that right?

835. Listen...

836. you were in love from the day you met me,

837. and for two years you were the man

838. of any woman's dreams, you know?

839. You'd have these ways of doing things.

840. It doesn't matter.

841. I didn't know that I was in love with you, too, until—

842. You cheated on me with your ex-boyfriend.

843. That's right! That's what happened.

844. I didn't know how I felt about you until I was with him again.

845. So technically, I wasn't cheating on the man I loved,

846. I was falling in love with the man I loved.

847. - While cheating on him with your ex-boyfriend. - Yes!

848. But you're missing that technically it wasn't cheating, though.

849. The more important thing is that I fell in love with you.

850. At the end of a romantic comedy

851. that would make everything okay!

852. There's something I've always been dying to ask you.

853. - Ask anything. - Why did you tell me?

854. - Because I wouldn't have been able to live with it. - Now I have to live with it.

855. - Would you rather I'd have been dishonest? - Yes!

856. Yes, I'd very much rather

857. you hadn't told me.

858. Still, 98%.

859. I'm sorry, we have to do the final rundown.

860. We're coming.

861. The first runner-up wasn't available?

862. 60 seconds to VTR.

863. Are we getting the opening in HD or SD?

864. Where's it coming to me? Which router?

865. Roll it in from the room.

866. Tess.

867. There's an SOT I want in the D block—

868. Sarah Palin's comment on the White House

869. not returning calls from the Dutch,

870. except she calls Holland Norway.

871. Find it, give it to Jake.

872. - Don't run it past Mac. - Yes, sir.

873. Did we go to Afghanistan because you cheated on Will?

874. - Can I get a little privacy? - Not until you learn how to send an e-mail.

875. - You got invaluable experience. - I got shot in the ass.

876. Well, be grateful you weren't facing the other direction.

877. 30 seconds out.

878. I've been cheated on.

879. One time literally right on top of me.

880. This happened because of me. No one should get fired.

881. I can resign, and it's fine because Don wants me at 10:00.

882. I hope you don't do that.

883. I hope you stay here.

884. Good show.

885. Can you move his BlackBerry off the desk?

886. - I can see it in the shot. - Will.

887. Can you move your BlackBerry off the desk?

888. Oh!

889. That wouldn't have happened if he'd had one of those rubber protectors.

890. - Does 3 have to change lenses? - No, we're good.

891. In four, three, two. Roll VTR.

892. Good evening. I'm Will McAvoy.

893. Deepwater Horizon continues to spill oil

894. even as it sinks into the Gulf,

895. a Republican candidate for Senate in Nevada advocates

896. poor people paying doctors with chickens,

897. and Greece activates a $45 billion aid package.

898. But we begin tonight in Arizona

899. where Governor Jan Brewer today signed into law SB 1070,

900. which allows police to ask for documentation

901. from anyone suspected of being in the country illegally.

902. Our coverage begins with Rachel Sachs

903. at the statehouse in Phoenix. Rachel?

904. I have no idea if the president even knows

905. that an entire Exxon Valdez is spilling into the Gulf every four days.

906. Are you really not sure?

907. Because that would make you dumber than previous estimates.

908. Would the two of you shut up?

909. - Sorry. - I miss my BlackBerry.

910. Joining us tonight from Washington is Daniel Mendoza,

911. Deputy Director of the National Council of La Raza,

912. the largest Hispanic civil rights organization in the US.

913. - Good evening, Mr. Mendoza. - Thanks for inviting me here to speak to you, Will.

914. Let's jump right in.

915. Estimates are that illegal immigrants

916. cost Arizonans $2.7 billion a year.

917. - Is that a problem worth fixing? - Of course it is.

918. But if it's an economic issue, you need to consider that

919. deporting 12 million undocumented workers

920. will drain 2.5 trillion over the next 10 years from our GDP.

921. Arizona residents overwhelmingly favor spending that money.

922. Back in two minutes.

923. - We don't have 1705. - Joey.

924. 30 seconds out.

925. - We know this next segment's going to be a problem. - Really?

926. Why do you automatically assume that a hospitality management major

927. won't be able to speak with sophistication about constitutional law?

928. Make sure everybody knows this is what blowing it looks like.

929. They know.

930. 20 out.

931. It's gonna be fine.

932. The PhD is cool with illegal immigrants

933. as long as they're checked for diseases like smallpox and gayness.

934. I'm not sure I gave Will the best form of the argument.

935. - Didn't we cure small— - Yes.

936. 15 back.

937. Does the militia guy really want his gun in the shot?

938. I asked him that and he said,

939. "This isn't a gun, it's a rifle.

940. And this rifle has a name, and her name is Jenny."

941. If you keep covering for people, I don't know who can do what.

942. - I wasn't covering. - You've got a crush on this girl.

943. You told me to. And, no, I don't.

944. In three, two. Cue Will.

945. Welcome back.

946. We're discussing Arizona's immigration bill SB 1070,

947. the Support Our Law Enforcement and Safe Neighborhoods Act,

948. which was signed into law today by Governor Jan Brewer.

949. Joining me now by satellite

950. are three strong supporters of the new law:

951. Dr. Dwayne Sotter, an academic

952. who's written extensively about immigration policy;

953. Ross Fernholm, a former Arizona State Patrolman

954. who now runs the all-volunteer Independence Border Guards in Yuma;

955. and Gwen Lalley, a junior at the University of New Mexico

956. and the second runner-up in last night's Miss USA Pageant,

957. who was asked about this very issue onstage

958. and who believes her answer was what kept her from winning.

959. Thank you all for being here.

960. - Thank you. - Thank you.

961. Will, I wanna be very clear—

962. my answer didn't keep me from winning,

963. it kept me from being first runner-up.

964. - And we're off. - Okay. Ahem.

965. Dr. Sotter, this is your field of expertise,

966. so let's kick it off with you.

967. What do you say to those who argue that SB 1070

968. is just targeting Americans on the basis of skin color and nationality alone?

969. Absolutely, Will.

970. What would you say to them?

971. I'd say absolutely.

972. The bill does not target religion or Muslims

973. or homosexuality, just illegal Mexicans.

974. Well, yes, but you would also say, right,

975. that the state legislature has taken great pains

976. to ensure that it isn't a racial profiling law,

977. even going so far as to amend it to include the following language.

978. - Go 24. - "Prosecutors would not investigate complaints

979. based on race, color, or national origin."

980. That's right, just Mexicans.

981. - Dr. Sotter— - Forgive me, Will. Latinos and Latinas.

982. And the argument that we don't want to be a country

983. that pulls people over and asks for their papers based on how they look?

984. Yeah, I don't like it any more than you do,

985. but that wouldn't be the case

986. if it weren't for the Latinos and Latinas,

987. el "criminelos," los "ilegatos."

988. That's not Spanish.

989. Ahem, Gwen, let's go to you.

990. You were asked last night about the immigration law

991. and you said it was an issue of states' rights.

992. And for that I paid a price.

993. That notwithstanding, you raised an interesting issue.

994. This law will surely be challenged in the courts

995. on constitutional grounds.

996. After all, states aren't allowed to create their own foreign policy,

997. but it sounds like you've got the right answer to that.

998. - Which is...? - I'm a survivor and I don't know the word "quit."

999. - Probably other words, too. - Shut it.

1000. Ahem, states aren't allowed to create

1001. their own foreign policy, but...?

1002. But this isn't about foreign policy,

1003. it's about law enforcement.

1004. Decades of federal inaction have led to a dangerous

1005. and unstable situation on Arizona's border.

1006. And if the federal government can't, or won't, act to uphold the law,

1007. then it's up to the states to exercise their power and fill that void.

1008. I'm an Ameri-can, Will, not an Ameri-can't.

1009. - Let's dump out of it. - Ross.

1010. - Yes. - No, the whole thing, dump out of it.

1011. I'm gonna go ahead and assume

1012. that you're a supporter of Second Amendment rights,

1013. - judging by the rifle you've placed in your live shot. - Yes, sir.

1014. A frequent argument you hear from gun rights advocates

1015. is that we don't need any more new laws;

1016. what we need is a government to enforce the laws we already have.

1017. Couldn't the same be said about immigration policy?

1018. Yes, sir.

1019. I'm saying you're a supporter of the new law, right?

1020. - Yes, sir. - I can't take my eyes off of it.

1021. Because?

1022. Because laws that are unwieldy and unenforceable aren't laws at all.

1023. - I don't follow. - Dump out of it.

1024. - And, Mr. McAdoo— - McAvoy.

1025. - I beg your pardon? - Doesn't matter.

1026. Why don't we just build a damn wall?

1027. The Chinese built one and you can see it from space.

1028. - Are the Chinese better than us? - No.

1029. Although there's an old saying— show me a 15-foot wall

1030. and I'll show you a 16-foot ladder.

1031. Then let's just build a 17-foot wall.

1032. - Hell, build it 18 feet. - Yes. Yep.

1033. - But you see their point, right? - Whose point?

1034. The people who build ladders.

1035. - How about we get... - I'm sorry, okay?

1036. - I'm sorry. Just dump out of it. - Will, can I jump in?

1037. - She cannot jump in. - Jump on in, Gwen.

1038. - I think we're creating an environment... - Ugh!

1039. where pageant contestants are afraid to speak their minds

1040. when it comes to important questions and whatnot,

1041. and that's not the America I grew up in.

1042. You're 20 years old. It is the America you grew up in.

1043. - Not in Oklahoma. - Especially in Oklahoma.

1044. But we're gonna have to leave it there.

1045. When we come back, Deepwater Horizon

1046. sinks to the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico.

1047. I envy it.

1048. with the White House now getting offers of assistance

1049. from other countries to help plug the gushing well.

1050. What's this new SOT? What's 907?

1051. - Will gave it to me last minute. - What is it?

1052. It's Sarah Palin on the spill.

1053. Former Alaskan governor and vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin

1054. weighed in earlier today on Fox News.

1055. Go 907.

1056. Well, then, what the federal government should have done

1057. was accept the assistance of foreign countries,

1058. of entrepreneurial Americans who have had solutions

1059. - that they wanted presented. - Who?

1060. They can't even get a phone call returned, Bill.

1061. The Dutch. They are known—

1062. in the Norwegian— they are known for dikes

1063. and for cleaning up water and for dealing with spills.

1064. They offered to help, and yet, no, they, too,

1065. with the proverbial can't even get a phone call back.

1066. Okay, what she was saying was that...

1067. All yours.

1068. yes, okay, the Dutch live in Holland

1069. and Norwegians live in Norway.

1070. That's a mistake that— people make that.

1071. And I think Governor Palin was referring

1072. to an old fairy tale about a boy—

1073. she was saying that people were offering to help, and that's great,

1074. and phone calls will be returned.

1075. William Duncan McAvoy.

1076. I think your parents wanted to make it

1077. plainly understood that you are Anglo-Saxon.

1078. I came up to personally apologize for tonight's show.

1079. The show kind of got away from you a little.

1080. It bordered on unprofessional.

1081. Here's unprofessional,

1082. here's the border, and here's professional,

1083. and all the way back here is tonight's show.

1084. - It was my fault. - Yeah.

1085. Did you know I got an e-mail from Mackenzie today saying—

1086. God. Yeah. I forgot you were gonna see that.

1087. Know how many people work at this company?

1088. Well, in the cable news division, I guess about 350.

1089. 178,000.

1090. Guys who sell jet engines got that e-mail.

1091. By the way, they also own a tabloid magazine.

1092. I'm inured to it. It happened.

1093. How's gossip gonna be worse?

1094. It's been three years. Time hasn't helped?

1095. No.

1096. I wish you had told me.

1097. What would you have said?

1098. - I'd have made you feel better. - How?

1099. I don't know. I do it all the time.

1100. Get it together down there, fast.

1101. - Got it. - One more thing.

1102. Your daily private meetings with Reese are over.

1103. Charlie, I respect you more than anyone I know,

1104. but I'm the one sitting in that chair.

1105. Yes, you are.

1106. People across America are watching Arizona,

1107. seeing how we implement this law,

1108. ready to jump on even the slightest misstep.

1109. Many opponents aren't even waiting for that.

1110. You need a drink?

1111. Sure.

1112. There's a karaoke bar down the street we go to.

1113. Drinks and appetizers are $3 until 9:00.

1114. It's 9:15.

1115. We sent an intern down at 8:55 to order 30 drinks

1116. and four platters of tuna jerky.

1117. The downside's the karaoke, but it's the only place nearby that stays open late

1118. unless you want to go to the theater district.

1119. I'd have thought the downside would be

1120. the four platters of tuna jerky.

1121. It's an affordable dinner.

1122. Let's go.

1123. - Are you in or are you out? - What?

1124. Are you in or are you out?

1125. - Are we doing this, then? - I don't understand. Are you mad at me right now?

1126. Palin. How did Palin get into the rundown?

1127. First of all, I'm the EP. Don't slip—

1128. I'm the managing editor and I don't need your permission—

1129. Yes, you do, and you didn't ask for it 'cause you knew you wouldn't get it.

1130. I made it clear that this show isn't going to participate

1131. in the endless cycle of codependency between Palin...

1132. - I know. - and insult to injury.

1133. You twisted yourself into a Windsor knot to save her.

1134. "I'm sure that what the governor meant

1135. was that the Dutch living in Norwegia have good ideas.

1136. And since she has an intimate knowledge

1137. of all calls going into and out of the White House,

1138. she's a credible source on whether the Swedisians

1139. have gotten their message returned."

1140. First of all, the impression— uncanny.

1141. I'm not the one who asked Victoria's Secret

1142. to do five minutes of economic reporting every night.

1143. Victoria's Secret has a PhD in economics from Duke

1144. and is an adjunct professor at Columbia.

1145. Are you in or are you out?

1146. I have to give you credit for thinking you can chew me out

1147. - on this particular— - I'll chew you out on any particular day.

1148. And by the way, when I say dump out of it, dump out of it.

1149. Reese got in your head.

1150. And so you put the almost-one-term governor

1151. of a state where nobody lives on our air.

1152. - I'm don't believe I'm hearing— - Yes, we fucked up

1153. on a huge subject, but ours was a mistake.

1154. Yours was fear,

1155. a need to be loved by strangers and not our show.

1156. Be the leader, Will.

1157. Be the moral center of this show.

1158. Be the integrity.

1159. Today's Friday.

1160. By Monday I want to know are you in or are you out?

1161. Does anyone believe I just got—

1162. We want to be the ones to do it.

1163. We want to be the ones to do 2.0.

1164. We can do this.

1165. Give me a second.

1166. How you doing?

1167. I'm doing all right, all rings consisted—

1168. considered.

1169. How much have you had to drink?

1170. I won't lie to you, Don.

1171. - Yes? - What?

1172. You said, "I won't lie to you, Don," and then you didn't say anything else.

1173. - I've had a drink. - A whole one?

1174. - Yeah. - That's too much for you.

1175. - It is not. - Come to 10:00.

1176. I really appreciate your offer,

1177. but I think you're offering it because I'm your girlfriend.

1178. What's wrong with that?

1179. Owww.

1180. You're supposed to say, "No, I'm not."

1181. You're just inexperienced. I will coach you up.

1182. I want to be a part of what Will and Mackenzie are trying to do.

1183. - Will and Mackenzie are gonna fail. - Jesus Christ, what's—

1184. just because the scenery fell down doesn't mean it's not a good play.

1185. Yeah, I don't know what that meant, but I'm not talking about tonight.

1186. Nobody's gonna watch a classroom.

1187. They'll either be bored or infuriated and you will bleed viewers.

1188. And my show with Elliot will get moved to 8:00.

1189. And at that point, I don't know that I'll be able to help you.

1190. - It was your fault. - Let's break up.

1191. - What did I do now? - You were too supportive.

1192. - Maggie— - I feel myself suffocating from your support.

1193. You want truth or support?

1194. Did you think I didn't know I fucked up?

1195. I've been saying it.

1196. I have $45,000 in student loans to pay off,

1197. I spend three weeks' take-home

1198. on half a one-bedroom apartment the size of a toolshed,

1199. and I'm sitting alone at a bar with a drink that was made an hour ago.

1200. A good day is when I have quarters for a dryer.

1201. A bad day is when I blow a newscast.

1202. That's my spectrum.

1203. Support is what I wanted right then.

1204. And I think you're rooting for Will to fail.

1205. - You just said it would be in your best interest— - Listen—

1206. And I know he's not the cuddliest guy in the world,

1207. but he is trying to do good

1208. and he's risking a lot to do it, and you and Reese—

1209. Yeah, yeah. Let's break up.

1210. Don't— no, don't go like this.

1211. I'm s— I'm sorry. I said the wrong thing.

1212. Don...

1213. Oh, I'm on fire today.

1214. - Evening, Mr. McAvoy. - Good evening, Manny.

1215. We know how to live with our neighbors here.

1216. - What's that? - Your show tonight.

1217. I—

1218. I really only drink when I'm scared.

1219. I would like to have a word with you right here and right now.

1220. Yes, ma'am.

1221. Don't "Yes, ma'am" me with your sheepish charm.

1222. Would you like to go someplace private?

1223. I— you covered for me.

1224. - Don't worry about it. - I wasn't thanking you.

1225. You and Don— why do you think I need protecting?

1226. You both like the fantasy of a girl in distress?

1227. - How about I put you in a cab? - I take the subway.

1228. - Why do you think I need prot— - I don't.

1229. But I cover for you, Mac covers for me,

1230. Will covers for everybody, Charlie covers for Will.

1231. How come nobody's yelling at me?

1232. - You know how bad you screwed up, right? - Yes.

1233. - Is there anyone who feels worse than you do? - No.

1234. Then I doubt it'll ever happen again.

1235. Let me give you money for a cab.

1236. No, I have to go to Don's apartment and apologize.

1237. - For what? - For suggesting he would—

1238. you know, for asking—

1239. I'll think of it on the way.

1240. We break up, I apologize, everything's fine.

1241. Sounds like a super-healthy relationship.

1242. - I'd fight for it. - I will fight for it.

1243. And I'll make it work through sheer force of will,

1244. just like Mackenzie will with Will

1245. and just like I made the immigration segment work.

1246. Will and Mackenzie are going to kill each other

1247. and the immigration segment was a train wreck.

1248. You should shut up more than you do.

1249. Do people tell you that?

1250. No.

1251. You're being polite.

1252. I still don't know why I'm being mean to you.

1253. Tess?

1254. - Would you? - Yeah.

1255. Sorry.

1256. Hang on, all of you.

1257. I'm your senior producer.

1258. Fuck up again like this, I'm gonna get mad.

1259. That's it.

1260. Take her to Don's place.

1261. - That was so awesome. - Thank you.

1262. - Do a shot. - No.

1263. - Hello? - Neal, it's Will.

1264. - I hope you don't mind my calling so late. - No.

1265. I got your number from— you know, there's a booklet.

1266. - The office directory. - Yeah.

1267. The guy you found in Spokane,

1268. I want you to get in touch with him

1269. and tell him that you're gonna pay for a cab

1270. to take him to and from work.

1271. He should send you the receipts, then give them to me.

1272. Will—

1273. come on, let me post this on your blog.

1274. - No. - Will—

1275. - Keep my name out of it. - Yes, sir.

1276. Is Mackenzie around there?

1277. Yeah.

1278. - Can you put her on the phone? - Sure.

1279. It's— it's Will.

1280. I'm sorry... about everything.

1281. I'm just so sorry.

1282. - There's no way I can even— - I'm in.

1283. - What? - I'm in. I'll see you on Monday.

1284. - Are you still gonna worry about the ratings? - Yes.

1285. - Still gonna worry about being popular? - Yeah.

1286. About being loved by strangers?

1287. Are you gonna keep asking me questions that all mean the same thing?

1288. Till I get the right answer.

1289. I'm in.

1290. There it is.