1. Come with us now on a journey
through time and space!Copy !req
2. To the world of The Mighty Boosh!Copy !req
3. What about this?Copy !req
4. Good.Copy !req
5. - How about this?
- Also good.Copy !req
6. What about this - to travelling?Copy !req
7. Oh.. manifique!Copy !req
8. The funky inuit?Copy !req
9. Very good.Copy !req
10. - What about this cape?
- A bit last week..Copy !req
11. I'll put that in the maybe-pile.Copy !req
12. Vince, you ready?Copy !req
13. Almost there, yeah. Narrowed it down to
these two piles.Copy !req
14. You are joking, aren't you? We're going
to a cabin in the woods.Copy !req
15. - So?
- For one weekend!Copy !req
16. Yeah, I suppose.Copy !req
17. Let's try and narrow it down, okay?Copy !req
18. Do you need this tie?Copy !req
19. Yeah! The tie is a multipurpose accessory.
You know, belt, schoolboy, Rambo.Copy !req
20. All right, what about this Jacobean ruff?Copy !req
21. Listen. I've got a strong feeling the Tudor look's
going to comeback in while we're away.Copy !req
22. - I don't want to get left behind.
- You'll be in the wilderness. Who's going to know?Copy !req
23. What if someone's photographing animals,
yeah, and I'm the back of the shot?Copy !req
24. The Internet's a powerful took these days.Copy !req
25. Vince, you've got to be more economical, like me.Copy !req
26. You see what I've got going on here? The multipurpose
tweed utility suit - it's all I'm taking and it's all I need!Copy !req
27. - Yeah, what if you wanna go swimming?
- It zips down to trunks.Copy !req
28. Well it's easy for you, isn't it?
You haven't got any style.Copy !req
29. Do you mind? I don't buffet about on the
winds of fashion.Copy !req
30. Fashion may come and go, Howard Moon
remains where he is.Copy !req
31. Clothes avalanche!Copy !req
32. All right, that's it! One suitcase!Copy !req
33. - Naboo, are you ready?
- Nearly, what do you think - red or blue?Copy !req
34. I don't care. We're supposed to have set off by now! What is
the matter with everyone? Did you get my itinerary?Copy !req
35. Look, chill out, we're going on holiday, it's suppose to be relaxing'!Copy !req
36. I'm going to have to type out a new one.Copy !req
37. - What about you? Have you packed?
- Yes I have! This is everything I need right here.Copy !req
38. - I'm wearing it! The multipurpose tweed utility suit!
- What if you want to go swimming?Copy !req
39. Happy? Now get ready!Copy !req
40. Oh, I didn't need to see that..Copy !req
41. - Okay Bollo. You ready?
- Hm, yeah.Copy !req
42. - Let's do it!
- Okay.Copy !req
43. Go on Bollo!Copy !req
44. - Use your monkey strength!
- Come on, baby!Copy !req
45. Get your primate arms out! Put your back into it!
Bit more, bit more, come on!Copy !req
46. - Yes!
- Quickly, quickly!Copy !req
47. Go!Copy !req
48. Nice!Copy !req
49. Can't you put your suit back on?Copy !req
50. The zip broke.Copy !req
51. - I hate wildness. Can't we go to Euro Disney?
- I'm not spending another summer in a Goofy lounge, okay?Copy !req
52. - I've booked us a cabin, deep in the woods.
- Great.Copy !req
53. - Is good for me actually.
- Is it really?Copy !req
54. I'm running low on supplies. As a shaman I can put it
down as a business trip and claim it all back.Copy !req
55. Nice.Copy !req
56. - Where you find out about this cabin?
- A little advert in the Global Explorer.Copy !req
57. A magazine I subscribe to.Copy !req
58. - Global Explorer?
- Very inspiring stuff.Copy !req
59. I hate that magazine. It's a sepia nightmare!
I tried to read it once, it get me a panic attack.Copy !req
60. - You heard of this?
- Huh?Copy !req
61. - Cheekbone?
- No.Copy !req
62. It's the most up to-date magazine around. It's so
cutting-edge, it goes out of date every three hours.Copy !req
63. - Really?
- You can't get it in shops. It's delivered by ninjas.Copy !req
64. Yeah, well, the Global Explorer never
goes out a date.Copy !req
65. There's photographs in there, that are eternally
relevant to our life and times, Vince.Copy !req
66. One day I intend to be on the cover of that magazine.Copy !req
67. - What, with a tropical disease?
- No!Copy !req
68. - With one of my photographs.
- What photographs?Copy !req
69. I'm building up quite a portfolio, I'll have you know.Copy !req
70. - What, are you a photographer now?
- Yes, sir.Copy !req
71. - I thought you were jazz poet.
- I do many things.Copy !req
72. That you don't know about. I span the genres, Vince.
They call me the Genre Spanner.Copy !req
73. They call you the Spanner.Copy !req
74. - Cheekbone.
- Cheers!Copy !req
75. Here's a poem for I'm the Moon. Neil
Armstrong walking on my face.Copy !req
76. Buzz Aldrin, he walking on my face. And then
the third one, a spaceman walkin' on my face.Copy !req
77. All on the surfaces, and they looking at all
the stuff that the Moon has got to offer.Copy !req
78. Hehe.. yeah.Copy !req
79. Here we are. What do you think of that?Copy !req
80. Is this the garage?Copy !req
81. No, this is it, Vince.Copy !req
82. Woow, check these out! A true hunters cabin, eh?Copy !req
83. Aah..Copy !req
84. Sorry Bollo..Copy !req
85. That was Chinque. He was my friend. As
children we played together in forest.Copy !req
86. My father warn us, "No go too far, for
there are hunter at edge of forest."Copy !req
87. But Chinque curious. He always say: 'Bollo, please. Please
let us go to edge of forest!' over and over and over..Copy !req
88. And so finally, one day, I chopped his head off.Copy !req
89. Cup of tea, anyone?Copy !req
90. Ah yes, this is more like it.Copy !req
91. A roaring fire, cup of tea, what more do you need, eh?Copy !req
92. Mtv?Copy !req
93. We're getting away from all that, Vince.
Getting away from the noise of the city.Copy !req
94. Listen - what can you hear?Copy !req
95. Your cells dying.Copy !req
96. - Tranquillity, Vince. The sound of nature.
- I'm bored!Copy !req
97. Yeah, well I knew you would be, which is why,
if you turn to page three of your itineraries,Copy !req
98. you'll find I've prepared a short introductory lecture on the
wildness, just to get you into the spirit of things, okay?Copy !req
99. I've gotta bad feeling about this.Copy !req
100. No kidding, let's get out of here.Copy !req
101. - Oi, where are you two going?
- Shaman business.Copy !req
102. - Well can I come with you?
- No, you've got to stay here with him.Copy !req
103. Aah, you're joking, he's insane!Copy !req
104. Look at him, he's all excited, you can't leave him.Copy !req
105. Thanks a lot.Copy !req
106. - Hey guys, what's happening?
- We're going to get some supplies.Copy !req
107. It's ten o'clock at night! You're going miss the lecture.Copy !req
108. It's the best time, there's no one around.Copy !req
109. - Oh.
- Do you want anything?Copy !req
110. - No, I'm fine, thanks.
- I'm getting some owl beaks, if you're interested.Copy !req
111. Owl beaks? What for?Copy !req
112. The thing is about owl beaks is they can restore
man's fire, if you get my drift..Copy !req
113. - I'm fine, thanks.
- Sure? A man of your age?Copy !req
114. - I said I'm fine.
- I get you, Vince is in the room.Copy !req
115. Just get out, will you, if you're going.Copy !req
116. Right, where were we?Copy !req
117. Get you a couple, yeah?Copy !req
118. Okay.. There you go.Copy !req
119. What's this for?Copy !req
120. Take notes and then we can do a Question & Answer
session in the interval.Copy !req
121. - Interval?
- Yes, sir.Copy !req
122. - Are you out of your mind?
- Simmer down.Copy !req
123. Now the life cycle of the frog. The frog is
an amphibian and he lays eggs...Copy !req
124. They're called spawn, which then become
tadpoles... dormant... hibernation...Copy !req
125. Now the brown bear, differing from the black bear,
will hibernate for up to three and a half months,Copy !req
126. the brown bear, obviously, three months. You can
have a look at your notes on that one.Copy !req
127. Interesting fact about those two bears, the black bear sometimes
can be brown and the brown bear can sometimes be..Copy !req
128. ..black! Haha..
Yes!Copy !req
129. - Well well, lookie here!
- Keep back, I know Wing-Chun!Copy !req
130. - You only had one lesson.
- Shut up!Copy !req
131. Cool your jets, I'm Kodiak Jack, I own this cabin, I'm just
checking in to see how you're all settling in.Copy !req
132. Kodiak, it's Howard Moon! We spoke on the
phone this morning.Copy !req
133. - The what?
- The telephone.Copy !req
134. Ooh, oh the talkiestick! Your voice was trapped
in there this morning!Copy !req
135. - Yeah, Howard Moon.
- Hello! -Well hello.Copy !req
136. And hello! What's your name sugar dumpling?Copy !req
137. Vince.Copy !req
138. Hm.. beautiful name.Copy !req
139. Well, we were just doing a lecture on the wildness here,
and you're welcome to sort of stick around and join us.Copy !req
140. - Oh yeah?
- Yeah!Copy !req
141. What do you know about that, Mr City balls?Copy !req
142. - Well uh.. I have read this rather large book on the wildness.
- Book? That's all you people know!Copy !req
143. Let me tell you something. It's all about experience.Copy !req
144. Have you ever had a mountain goat grab you by the scrotum
and run away with it? Then sell it on ebay a day later?Copy !req
145. - Huh?
- No.Copy !req
146. - Have you ever been rohypnoted by a swan? Woke up in Cancun?
- No.Copy !req
147. You ever been to a tea party with a herd of rhino?
Well, I HAVE! And it ain't purdy!Copy !req
148. - Right..
- I've had run-ins with all these animals and I killed 'em all.Copy !req
149. I killed that one. I killed that one! I...
killed that one.Copy !req
150. Well.. I've had some pretty hairy moments myself, sir, yes sir.Copy !req
151. Oh yeah? You got any scars to prove it?Copy !req
152. - Emotional scars? Yes..
- Yeah? Check this out!Copy !req
153. Moose bite, 1973. Ain't nothing emotional about that.Copy !req
154. Check this out! Horn of a wildebeest ripped it wide open.
Had to tie it up with my own shoestring!Copy !req
155. Yeah? Big deal! See that? Straighteners, Nicky Clarke. Hottest
you can get. Fell asleep on them while I was pissed.Copy !req
156. - Jiminy Christmas!
- Now, can you get out please? 'Cause I want to go to bed.Copy !req
157. Oh.. yes. Pardonnez-moi. Of course. I hope we meet
again sometime under different circumstances.Copy !req
158. - What a character!
- What a freak!Copy !req
159. Uuh, mister, I was wondering if you'd care to join
me for a drink and possibly a smoke on the porch?Copy !req
160. - Man to man, so to speak.
- Don't mind if I do, sir.Copy !req
161. Me and Jack are just going to have a little
bit of a wildness chat, check you in a bit.Copy !req
162. Yeah, whatever..Copy !req
163. Get some of that for me, will you, Bollo?Copy !req
164. Hm.. okay.. Oh, three for two. Bargain!Copy !req
165. And when the spaceman come, they did experimentens
with a hammer and the feather.Copy !req
166. to see which one would land first. And, do you know, on the
moon's surface, they land at exactly the same time!Copy !req
167. They could have done that with anything - beach ball,
peg, magnet.. Little drawing of some chicken..Copy !req
168. It don't make no difference. When you on the
Moon, everything lands the same.Copy !req
169. Beautiful view, huh?Copy !req
170. Oh yeah..Copy !req
171. You know, when I see a view like that I'm always
aware of the terrifying insignificance of mankindCopy !req
172. and yet, at the same time, the irrevocable connection
that we all have with the universe..Copy !req
173. You know what I think about?Copy !req
174. All the tiny animal penises all over! Anyway,
I've got a question for you.Copy !req
175. You two out here on your honeymoon?Copy !req
176. Uh.. no Jack.. I think you've got the wrong
end of the stick there. Hahaha..Copy !req
177. Well uh.. what are you doing out here in these parts, then?Copy !req
178. Well I'm a wildlife photographer by trade.
Just building myself up a portfolio, sir..Copy !req
179. - Ah, picture box!
- That's me, it's in my blood, you know?Copy !req
180. Well uh.. maybe I can help you with that.Copy !req
181. - How?
- Well you know, left to your own devices out here in the forest,Copy !req
182. you'd be lucky to get a picture of a chip
muck or a piece of moss.Copy !req
183. But I know the whereabouts of a creature,
that's never been seen by human eyeballs.Copy !req
184. You get a photograph of that, you'll be famous!
On a cover of some fancy magazine!Copy !req
185. You see this map right here? Leads directly
to the creature's lair, out on Piney Ridge.Copy !req
186. - Can I have a look at that?
- Maybe you can and maybe you can't.Copy !req
187. Can I?Copy !req
188. Well, maybe I've got something you want and
maybe you've got something I want.Copy !req
189. - What?
- Well you know..Copy !req
190. ..man does get lonely out here in the woods.Copy !req
191. Uh.. no Jack, I'm sorry.. I mean I'm a liberal guy,
but I will draw the line there, I'm afraid.Copy !req
192. Not you, you dickbrain! I'm talking about hoochie-coochie
pants in there. Man does have his standards.Copy !req
193. We don't often get a little cute, nubile
princess like that around here.Copy !req
194. Usually old, weather-beaten types like yourself..Copy !req
195. Look, I could never do that, okay? Vince's a friend
of mine, so I bid you good night!Copy !req
196. Well that's a shame, I guess you won't be needing
a photo of the one and only, the legendary - Yeti!Copy !req
197. How long would you need him for?Copy !req
198. Excuse me. Are these supposed to be like this?Copy !req
199. Oh, sorry it's burst..Copy !req
200. - Bollo get us some more jaguar tears, will you?
They're going everywhere. -Okay.Copy !req
201. - Just by horns and hooves.
- Oh, okay.Copy !req
202. - You all right, Barry?
- All right Naboo.Copy !req
203. I haven't seen you for ages! When was it?
Whikkam caves. Quite a night.Copy !req
204. Yeah, I was out of my head that night - sick in
my turban. You were all over the shop.Copy !req
205. I know, it was my birthday. I was off my chops!
I had two Mick Jaggers and a line of cheap whizz.Copy !req
206. - Anyway, what are you up to these days?
- Oh, I've gone freelance.Copy !req
207. - You've still got Bollo?
- Yeah, he's over there getting me some stuff.Copy !req
208. - All right Bollo!
- Huh.Copy !req
209. Where's your familiar?Copy !req
210. Ah! This is Chrissie.Copy !req
211. - Oh, he's lovely, this one. I thought you had a black cat.
- I did. Doing my head in. Got myself an upgrade.Copy !req
212. - I wish I could get an upgrade.
- Well, you should. He's tiny, got all the latest features.Copy !req
213. - Got a points card?
- Bollo?Copy !req
214. - Oh, sorry. I forgot it.
- See what I mean? That's worth fifty magic carpet miles.Copy !req
215. - Upgrade.
- See ya later Barry.Copy !req
216. Here, Naboo, can I have a word?Copy !req
217. If I was you, I'd keep yourself indoors
tonight. Avoid the forest.Copy !req
218. - Oh yeah?
- Apparently it's breeding night for the Yeti.Copy !req
219. - I thought they were hibernating?
- They are, but every 25 years they come out.Copy !req
220. Look for a man to breed with. They're bloody
rampant. If I was you, I'd avoid Piney Ridge.Copy !req
221. - How did you find out about this?
- Chrissie, gets all the latest, he's got sonar.Copy !req
222. - Why didn't you tell me about this, Bollo?
- Well, I told you I had a bad feeling.Copy !req
223. Any details?
See you later, Barry.Copy !req
224. All right there, gorgeous. When do you knock off?Copy !req
225. ~No, please don't go ~ Come in!
- Well hello there!Copy !req
226. - What do you want?
- Well, I brought you some flowers. Picked 'em myself.Copy !req
227. Where's Howard?Copy !req
228. Oh, he's fine. He just went for a walk on
Piney Ridge. Left us alone for a while.Copy !req
229. - What are you eating?
- Owl beaks. Do you want some?Copy !req
230. - No, I'm fine.
- Gets you in a mood.Copy !req
231. - Mood for what?
- Purdy little thing like you and a big old mountain man like me...Copy !req
232. - Get away from me!
- But I loves you, Vincey!Copy !req
233. - You're weird, get off me!
- I love my little Vincey!Copy !req
234. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!Copy !req
235. There you go, Nicky Clarke - hottest you can get!Copy !req
236. What's going on?Copy !req
237. I'll tell you what's going on. I've just narrowly
avoided a bumming from Grizzly Adams!Copy !req
238. - Where's Howard?
- He went for a walk or something out a Piney ridge.Copy !req
239. What? Have I got a shit on my face?Copy !req
240. - Do you think Howard will be all right, Naboo?
- We're going to have to move fast, before the Yetis get him.Copy !req
241. - What are they going to do to him if they catch him?
- I don't even want to speak it's name.Copy !req
242. - All right, we'd better get to Piney ridge quick smart.
- Well, let's get to move on then!Copy !req
243. - Yeah.. I can't drive.
- I can't drive, either!Copy !req
244. - I thought you could!
- I thought you could!Copy !req
245. - Aaaaah...
- Idiots...Copy !req
246. - Did you bring your magic carpet?
- Howard wouldn't let me pack it - 'one suitcase'!Copy !req
247. - Oh what are we gonna do?
- Bollo?Copy !req
248. Come on Bollo, get your monkey anus up at
the steering wheel.Copy !req
249. - Bollo no drive.
- You're joking, why not?Copy !req
250. - Bollo lose licence.
- When did that happen?Copy !req
251. Long time ago.. It was Chinque. As teenager we
would drive about down together.Copy !req
252. My father warn us, "no drive too fast, for there
are speed camera on A49."Copy !req
253. But Chinque crazy. He dangerous. He always say:
"Please, Bollo. Please let us go faster."Copy !req
254. - Yeah, yeah, so you chopped his head off, right?
- No. I chopped his feet off. Stopped him pressing accelerator.Copy !req
255. Have you got any more stories about Chinque, Bollo?
Do you mind we should get Howard?Copy !req
256. - Uh. What are we going to do? Piney Ridge is about 5 hours away on foot.
- Mini cab?Copy !req
257. - Cheekbone.
- Ooh, cheers! Haha, new issue!Copy !req
258. The Jacobean ruff's back in. I knew it. Genius!Copy !req
259. - Hey, mate, you can't drive, can you?
- Yes.Copy !req
260. Yes!Copy !req
261. - Aaaaaaah..
- Speed camera!Copy !req
262. Howard! Howard!Copy !req
263. Jeez, I thought Bollo had big feet, look at this!Copy !req
264. Shit.Copy !req
265. Now don't panic anyone. I'm a shaman - we've studied Yeties,
haven't we, Bollo? There's something they don't like, what is it?Copy !req
266. - Uuuh.. cheese?
- No.Copy !req
267. - Uuuh.. lipstick?
- No..Copy !req
268. - Uuh.. connect-four?
- No!Copy !req
269. Uuuh.. mirrors! They're scared of their own
reflection! If only we had a mirror..Copy !req
270. - What size do you need?
- What?Copy !req
271. Well, do you want a hand held, full length, make-up
mirror, this one's good for close-ups.Copy !req
272. Great, give me that.Copy !req
273. - Actually, I think that was unicorns..
- Nice try.Copy !req
274. Kalamalooo... Cachoola, Panto, Tatsita, Sacoolo, Fanto.Copy !req
275. - We thougt you've been killed!
- What? By these guys? They're peaceful.Copy !req
276. What's wrong with you? What's wrong with
your eyes? You look weird, Howard.Copy !req
277. Howard? Oh yes, I remember him. Paranoid. At odds
with himself. He's gone now. Say hello to Parsley.Copy !req
278. - Parsley? What's the matter with you?
- I feel free inside.Copy !req
279. - That's great Parsley, let's get out of here.
- Whoa there, what's the rush? Stay a while.Copy !req
280. - This is my home now.
- What - in the woods?Copy !req
281. - Come! Let me show you.
- You've gone insane!Copy !req
282. I resisted at first, but now the rhythms of the forest
flow through me, and they can flow through you, too.Copy !req
283. - Follow me, forget the world.
Look around at the wonders of nature ~Copy !req
284. - Never fear, everything is here.
And you don't need your friends or family ~Copy !req
285. - We are family ~Copy !req
286. - Come with me and then you will see.
Everything you need within life ~Copy !req
287. - Hey, ho, it's easy letting go.
When nothing before was real ~Copy !req
288. - Look into our eyes, you can see the future.
Look into our eyes, we can see your soul ~Copy !req
289. - We will be together.
Everything is here ~Copy !req
290. - He's gone wrong!
- I know, he's in a trance.Copy !req
291. It's all part of the ritual - it's what they
do before they breed with you.Copy !req
292. - What's Bollo doing?
- Aah, he's gone too..Copy !req
293. Listen, Vince, this is Yeti magic, don't listen to the hippie
nonsense. You're a punk, stay punk, think of Johnny Thunders.Copy !req
294. - Right.
- Mick and Keith. Block it out.Copy !req
295. - Okay, but what about you, Naboo?
- Don't worry about me, I'm a shaman. My minds like a fortress.Copy !req
296. - Listen to your heart, everything is good here.
Nothing before was real ~Copy !req
297. - Never fear, everything is here.
And you don't need your friends or family ~Copy !req
298. - Listen to your heart, it's easy letting go.
We are family, we are family ~Copy !req
299. - Look into our eyes, you can see the future.
Look into our eyes, we can see your soul ~Copy !req
300. - Hey, ho, it's easy letting go.
When nothing before was real ~Copy !req
301. - Listen to your heart, everything is good here.
Nothing before was real ~Copy !req
302. - Listen to your heart, everything is good here.
Listen to your heart, everything is good.. ~Copy !req
303. - Huh?
- Run for your lives!Copy !req
304. - Where am I?
- Aaaaargh! I've got bunches!Copy !req
305. Where's my turban?Copy !req
306. It's the gueen and she's horny as hell!
Run little Vincey, I'll save you!Copy !req
307. Come here, you little Yeti-biatch!Copy !req
308. Biatch?Copy !req
309. No, no... uh.. aaaargh!Copy !req
310. Aaaargh, oh little to the left, oh yeah..
Vince I didn't get your email!Copy !req
311. Wait for me!Copy !req
312. Security to aisle seven, please.Copy !req
313. - Sorry..
- Aaaaargh..Copy !req
314. - Malt loaf.
- What?Copy !req
315. - Malt loaf.
- What are you talking about?Copy !req
316. - It's what the Yeties are afraid of!
- Great, just in time there, Naboo.Copy !req
317. I had some of as well, it's on the GI diet.Copy !req
318. - Can we go to the Goofy lounge next year?
- That's fine by me.Copy !req
319. - Thank you!
- Good day sir.Copy !req
320. New Global Explorer's in. Hahahaaa..Copy !req
321. I don't believe it!Copy !req
322. Vince Noir finds Yeti! Hahaha cool!Copy !req
323. I say, old bean, would you be kind enough
to sign a copy for my wife?Copy !req
324. - No problem.
- Make it out to Allan.Copy !req
325. - There you go.
- Thank you.Copy !req
326. Oh dear...Copy !req
327. Subtitles made by Martinibaby :)Copy !req
328. Big thanks to Michelle for helping me!Copy !req