1. Clancy, it's your sister.Copy !req
2. You need to call me back right now.Copy !req
3. I... I'm frickin' peeved off, man.
There's no reason that you're—Copy !req
4. This is a message for Clancy GilroyCopy !req
5. from Carl Traunch from Traunch Video.Copy !req
6. You're 17 days late on three video games.Copy !req
7. Please return our property, or we're gonna
be forced to hire a bounty hunter, fucker.Copy !req
8. Messages deleted.Copy !req
9. New subscriber, Master.Copy !req
10. - It's your boy Daniel Hoops.
Daniel Hoops.Copy !req
11. - Welcome to my space site.
Damn.Copy !req
12. Damn! Ice cream drought... That is brutal!Copy !req
13. I'll do whatever it takes.
I'll get your creams.Copy !req
14. Good morning, Master.Copy !req
15. Did you get a chance to read
the Universe Simulator FAQCopy !req
16. - I left in your inbox?
- No.Copy !req
17. Do you have a planet
that has ice cream on it,Copy !req
18. like an ice cream world?Copy !req
19. Master, I don't mean to nag,Copy !req
20. - but simulator maintenance...
- Oh, boy! Here we go again.Copy !req
21. is important for me not to wobble,
so that I continue to function properly...Copy !req
22. Ice cream,
there's got to be a planet with ice cream.Copy !req
23. Master, I must insist.
- Ask and you shall receive.Copy !req
24. - Ice Cream Planet.
- Uh, Master?Copy !req
25. Let's do a quick ice cream scan.
Do an ice cream scan.Copy !req
26. Initiating ice cream scan.Copy !req
27. My rapidly deteriorating sensors have
honed in on this magical fishbowl man.Copy !req
28. Perfect. I'll get ice cream for Hoops
and talk to a fish. Send me in.Copy !req
29. As you wish.Copy !req
30. Um, I stayed up all night
making these new avatars.Copy !req
31. - Yeah, I know.
- Corners. Chippy.Copy !req
32. Little— Prim— Tep— Parspedewol—Copy !req
33. - I want to be that little ad monkey.
- Avatar selected.Copy !req
34. You chose
Glorious Phoenix of Eternal Light.Copy !req
35. Merging with simulator in three,Copy !req
36. - two, one...Copy !req
37. Ahoy!Copy !req
38. Captain, you got any ice cream
on this big fun boat?Copy !req
39. If not, could I interview you
for my spacecast?Copy !req
40. It goes into space.Copy !req
41. You know what?
I'll just set up my drones.Copy !req
42. Should I just follow you?Copy !req
43. Is that a yes? Or a no?Copy !req
44. Okay. We're goin' over here now.
That's great.Copy !req
45. We're going in here now. This is great.Copy !req
46. Now you're doing that. It's great.Copy !req
47. This is great.Copy !req
48. Just a little explanation
before we even start.Copy !req
49. Oh, we're starting. Oh, great.Copy !req
50. Magic is what I am.Copy !req
51. The reason that meditation
is so important in magicCopy !req
52. is because whatever we fasten
our attention on,Copy !req
53. that's the direction our energy
is going to flow in,Copy !req
54. so when you're doing magic,Copy !req
55. you want to keep your mind
as single-pointedly focusedCopy !req
56. on whatever you're trying
to accomplish as possible.Copy !req
57. Huh.Copy !req
58. So, that's what meditation does.Copy !req
59. It trains your mind, you know,
so it's not constantly scatteredCopy !req
60. and going into all different directionsCopy !req
61. and dispersing the energy
you're trying to build up.Copy !req
62. Right. I know what you're talking about.
I've read books on magic.Copy !req
63. I mean, Crowley, wow.Copy !req
64. But, Jesus,
he sure comes across as somber sometimes.Copy !req
65. Yes, he does.Copy !req
66. Lord.Copy !req
67. And it takes forever to sort of crack open
what he's even saying.Copy !req
68. You know, you've got to learn
so much other stuffCopy !req
69. before you can even begin to understand
what the hell he's actually talking aboutCopy !req
70. a lot of times, because so much of it
is written in a kind of code.Copy !req
71. Whoo! Yeah! You know, I've noticed
a lot of magical stuff gets put into code.Copy !req
72. It's like they're trying to protect—Copy !req
73. Yeah, I've noticed that
compared to some magical writings,Copy !req
74. some of the Eastern traditions
seem way more simple.Copy !req
75. Yeah, and the reason for thatCopy !req
76. is because when you're talking about
Eastern traditions, Eastern paths,Copy !req
77. most of these practices are set upCopy !req
78. to lead you to this state
of what they call "enlightenment,"Copy !req
79. what in magic we'd call
"crossing the abyss."Copy !req
80. Eastern traditions are focused on doing
that over a period of several lifetimes.Copy !req
81. Hmm.Copy !req
82. Magic is like pouring jet fuel
on that process.Copy !req
83. It aims to accomplish it in one lifetime.Copy !req
84. So, what you're trying to do
is cram several lifetimesCopy !req
85. of spiritual
and energetic experiences into one,Copy !req
86. and that can be
a little overwhelming sometimes.Copy !req
87. That's right.
And is that tantra?Copy !req
88. - That reminds me of tantra. It's—
Yes.Copy !req
89. It's... Tantra actually plays a huge role
in certain aspectsCopy !req
90. or certain traditions of magic
like the OTO, you know,Copy !req
91. which Crowley was the head of
whenever he died.Copy !req
92. I knew it!Copy !req
93. I notice you've been ordained
in Rinzai Zen.Copy !req
94. Rinzai Zen Buddhism?Copy !req
95. Yes, it was the tradition that trained
the samurai in ancient Japan.Copy !req
96. When I was in prison, I had a zen master
that would come back and forth from JapanCopy !req
97. to the prison.Copy !req
98. And, you know, I sat
zazen meditation for years,Copy !req
99. and, honestly, I did not get as much
out of years of Eastern practicesCopy !req
100. as I did months of ceremonial magic.Copy !req
101. And I think part of that... It's...Copy !req
102. They're both aiming at the same thing,
but whenever we,Copy !req
103. especially someone
coming from my background,Copy !req
104. just poor white trash from Arkansas
who has no connection to, you know,Copy !req
105. any Eastern tradition at all,
I had to learn that stuff from scratch.Copy !req
106. So it was like learning
an entire different language.Copy !req
107. Whereas magic deals with
Western iconography, symbolism,Copy !req
108. things that we've grown up
having shoved into our psycheCopy !req
109. from the second we came into this world.Copy !req
110. So, I think part of us,
some really deep, internal part,Copy !req
111. responds to it a lot quickerCopy !req
112. - than it does the Eastern traditions.
- Oh, right!Copy !req
113. I've heard different versions
of what you're saying.Copy !req
114. That's cool.
For example, let's take Ganesh.Copy !req
115. You know, like...Copy !req
116. Or, no, maybe Hanuman, for example.
You know, the monkey god.Copy !req
117. It's like, this is a very powerful symbol,Copy !req
118. but how many of us have had any
real experience with monkeys in the wild?Copy !req
119. Yes,
we didn't have many monkeys in Arkansas.Copy !req
120. Too bad! I love 'em.
They are annoying, though.Copy !req
121. - Whoo! Those are some bad fish.
- Yeah. Ha.Copy !req
122. You know, I don't have very many friendsCopy !req
123. - just because magic is my life.
- For sure.Copy !req
124. I do this for hours a day.Copy !req
125. This is not something that I do as,
like, a hobby...Copy !req
126. - ... or, you know,Copy !req
127. something on the side.Copy !req
128. - This is the focal point of my life.
- Sweet darling!Copy !req
129. I can tell.Copy !req
130. That's when I realized...Copy !req
131. That's why I wasn't miserable
a lot of timesCopy !req
132. when I was in prison,
because even in there,Copy !req
133. in a hellish situation, I was doing what
I was put here to do, which was magic.Copy !req
134. That alleviates a lot of suffering.Copy !req
135. And if people jump ahead too far, you can
really blow your face off with this stuff,Copy !req
136. - so to speak, right?Copy !req
137. What are the roots of magic?Copy !req
138. You know, magic, ceremonial magic,
what we call high magic,Copy !req
139. um, originated in ancient Mesopotamia
somewhere around 3500 BC.Copy !req
140. So, it is uniquely Western.Copy !req
141. That's not entirely the West,
it's more the Middle East,Copy !req
142. because it originated
in a part of the worldCopy !req
143. that would now be, you know,
present-day Iraq in a city called Nippur.Copy !req
144. What happened,
the way we got it in Europe wasCopy !req
145. whenever the Knights Templar
were sent over thereCopy !req
146. to escort pilgrims back and forth
from the Holy Land to make sureCopy !req
147. they're not attacked by bandits,
things like that.Copy !req
148. - Your cats are really talented.
Well, thank you.Copy !req
149. The Knights Templar
come in contact with this current,Copy !req
150. and when I say "current,"
what I'm talking about...Copy !req
151. You know how in certain
Buddhist traditions...Copy !req
152. Yeah.
like, say, Tibetan Buddhism,Copy !req
153. they talk about...Copy !req
154. - What's the word? Empowerments.
- Sure.Copy !req
155. You know, it's like a current of energy
passed along from master to student.Copy !req
156. Ceremonial magic
is the exact same thing.Copy !req
157. The Knights Templar started receiving
this current whenever they were there.Copy !req
158. That's how it makes its way
back to Europe.Copy !req
159. Eventually makes its way
to the United StatesCopy !req
160. through
the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn,Copy !req
161. which was the order
that Crowley was a member ofCopy !req
162. before he, you know, went off to the OTO.Copy !req
163. You had MacGregor Mathers,
Dion Fortune, the poet WB Yeats.Copy !req
164. All of these people
were members of the Golden Dawn.Copy !req
165. That's how this current
makes its way to the US.Copy !req
166. One second.Copy !req
167. Hey, Steve!Copy !req
168. What the fuck? You need to shine
that light in my fucking eyes?Copy !req
169. If that's how you're gonna talk
to customers,Copy !req
170. I'll just take my ship full of cats
and find another junk island.Copy !req
171. A ship full of cats? Ah, shit!Copy !req
172. My apologies!Copy !req
173. Look at all these wonderful gifts
and gadgets here.Copy !req
174. We got a fresh printer,
time slapper, some cans...Copy !req
175. And, ooh...Copy !req
176. you want that?Copy !req
177. A vintage enlil? That ain't cheap, pal.Copy !req
178. It's gonna be... five cats.Copy !req
179. He's bluffing. I can get it for three.
Watch this.Copy !req
180. - Three!
- Five!Copy !req
181. Fine, Steve.
Four, and that's my last offer.Copy !req
182. All right. You're taking flakes
outta my minnow's mouth, but fine.Copy !req
183. Four it is. Send them over.Copy !req
184. Um, I forgot what the hell
we were talking about.Copy !req
185. We're talking about the transmission,Copy !req
186. what's also known as
the disciplic succession.Copy !req
187. Yes. People think...Copy !req
188. Here's the thing that is so importantCopy !req
189. that I want people to understand about
magic when I talk about it a lot of times.Copy !req
190. When we're talking about
something being an oral tradition,Copy !req
191. we sort of live under
this misunderstandingCopy !req
192. that that means it's just
a bunch of stories told, handed on.Copy !req
193. That's not what this means.Copy !req
194. What an oral tradition is,
it means the way this current of energyCopy !req
195. is passed from one person to another
is through the voice.Copy !req
196. - Our voice is sound waves.
Yeah.Copy !req
197. We're creating sound waves
which carry information.Copy !req
198. That's why, in the Bible...Copy !req
199. I always tell people the Bible is
the greatest book of magic ever writtenCopy !req
200. once you know how to read it.Copy !req
201. The whole thing
in the very first chapter of the Bible,Copy !req
202. they're talking about, in the beginning
was the Word, and the Word was God.Copy !req
203. That's because this is an oral tradition.Copy !req
204. - It's— Does that make sense?
You're blowing my mind!Copy !req
205. So that goes all the way back
to, um, ancient Mesopotamia...Copy !req
206. - I forgot—
Maybe further back.Copy !req
207. Is it the words that have the energy,Copy !req
208. or is it the energy coming out
of the person saying the words?Copy !req
209. Combination of both.Copy !req
210. For example, you can only pass the current
if you've received the current.Copy !req
211. Like, you could say
the exact same words...Copy !req
212. that a person
who's holding the current would say,Copy !req
213. and if you're not holding the current,
it's not going to transmit.Copy !req
214. You have to be holding the current
and have the right words.Copy !req
215. There's two reasons to do magic.Copy !req
216. One is for manifesting something,Copy !req
217. and that can be anything from
a parking spot to the career you wantCopy !req
218. to the relationship you want to be in,
whatever it is.Copy !req
219. The other reason for doing magic
is what I call spiritual sustenance,Copy !req
220. where you are deliberately invoking energy
and intelligences that you then absorbCopy !req
221. into your energy system,
into your aura, to make you grow,Copy !req
222. - make you change.
- That cat just sloshed me!Copy !req
223. That's the mama cat.
She's a prankster.Copy !req
224. There's two ways
that magic is passed on.Copy !req
225. One is through a lodge or order setting,
you know, like the Golden Dawn.Copy !req
226. That's more like a curriculum-type thing,
like a school, you know.Copy !req
227. Everybody's learning the same thing
at the same rate.Copy !req
228. The other way is, like,
master to student, and that allows for...Copy !req
229. Thank you.
things that are a little more profound,Copy !req
230. just because you're not learning
the same thing as everyone else.Copy !req
231. Blessed be thy feet,
that they may walk this path.Copy !req
232. If it's someone who knows
what they're doing, they can judgeCopy !req
233. where you're at.Copy !req
234. Mentally where you're at,
emotionally where you're at, spiritually,Copy !req
235. and figure out what it is that you need
to sort of set off these bombs...Copy !req
236. - Whoa!Copy !req
237. that cause epiphanies and realizationsCopy !req
238. - and things like that.
Yeah.Copy !req
239. Yeah!Copy !req
240. Woo-hoo-hoo!Copy !req
241. Most people spend their livesCopy !req
242. - complaining about things they don't like.
Yes.Copy !req
243. So, you're adding power to it.
You're giving it chi.Copy !req
244. We're supposed to focus on what it is
that we're wanting to move towardsCopy !req
245. instead of away from.Copy !req
246. You don't have to lie
when something is bad.Copy !req
247. You know, if you have a cold
and someone says, "Are you sick?"Copy !req
248. that doesn't mean say, "No."Copy !req
249. It means say,
"I'm getting better minute by minute."Copy !req
250. Oh, that's great.Copy !req
251. Do you think that the reason
you ended up in prison is because,Copy !req
252. this sounds so weird,
good karma?Copy !req
253. Yes. I absolute—Copy !req
254. This will sound crazy to people,
but I absolutely do.Copy !req
255. I am thankful now
for the time that I spent in prison.Copy !req
256. Even for some of the most horrible things
that happened to me.Copy !req
257. Say, for example, when I was beaten so bad
that I was in a lot of physical pain,Copy !req
258. if I would have been out here,
I could've just went to a doctor.Copy !req
259. I didn't have that option in there.Copy !req
260. I had to find ways to help me copeCopy !req
261. with not only the emotional
and mental anguish I was going through,Copy !req
262. but also the physical anguish,
the physical pain.Copy !req
263. So that pushed me constantly
to keep exploring what was possibleCopy !req
264. with these practices.Copy !req
265. By the time that I got out of prison,Copy !req
266. I didn't even feel like
I was in prison anymore.Copy !req
267. My cell almost felt like
a control tower...Copy !req
268. where I could reach out
and touch anything in the world.Copy !req
269. I look at people out here now
who think that I had a horrible life.Copy !req
270. Ah...Copy !req
271. And don't get me wrong, there were
some pretty unpleasant aspects of it.Copy !req
272. - Can we go—
- You know, whether it was beatingCopy !req
273. - or starvation...
- Forget it.Copy !req
274. or just living in fear sometimesCopy !req
275. that these people
are gonna kill you at any minute.Copy !req
276. Whatever it is, still,
I think I had a better lifeCopy !req
277. than most of, like, the millennials I see
sort of flailing around out there now,Copy !req
278. trying to figure out who they are
and what they're gonna do with—Copy !req
279. - I never had to experience that.
- Right.Copy !req
280. - You puke ice cream?Copy !req
281. I always knew what I was.Copy !req
282. I always knew
what I was supposed to be doing.Copy !req
283. And I kinda embraced that.Copy !req
284. Yeah!Copy !req
285. When you say "control tower"
and "reaching out,"Copy !req
286. do you mean that you were doing
some form of astral projectionCopy !req
287. - or some kind of—
- That is part of magic,Copy !req
288. and I don't like that word, actually,
but I don't know another word to use,Copy !req
289. - astral projection...
- Ow!Copy !req
290. just because
it sounds so kind of flaky and New Agey.Copy !req
291. In our society,
not just our society in the West,Copy !req
292. but also in the East, we've sorta
arrived at this conclusion somehow...Copy !req
293. Spirituality has become so watered down
that we think enlightenmentCopy !req
294. is the be-all and the end-all
of spiritual practice.Copy !req
295. - It's the finish line. It's not.Copy !req
296. There are actually things
that come after that.Copy !req
297. What we think of as enlightenment
is the first step in a process.Copy !req
298. In magic, what they call in the East
"enlightenment,"Copy !req
299. we call "solar consciousness."Copy !req
300. Solar consciousness meansCopy !req
301. that you are completely and absolutely
in the present moment,Copy !req
302. just like
whenever you achieve enlightenment.Copy !req
303. After you develop solar consciousness,Copy !req
304. the next step in this processCopy !req
305. is developing what we call
the "solar body."Copy !req
306. You are building a vehicle
to allow your consciousnessCopy !req
307. to not disintegrate at the point
of what we call the Second Death.Copy !req
308. The First Death
is when the physical body dies.Copy !req
309. The Second Death is whenever
your astral or etheric bodyCopy !req
310. begins to unravel.Copy !req
311. That's whenever your consciousness goes
through this cosmic washing machine...Copy !req
312. - ... every aspect of personalityCopy !req
313. is washed out of it,Copy !req
314. you're left with a kernel
of pure energy,Copy !req
315. which is then recycled
into something else.Copy !req
316. If you develop the solar body,
that doesn't happen.Copy !req
317. You put your consciousness
into the solar bodyCopy !req
318. at the moment of death.Copy !req
319. You then become...Copy !req
320. not entirely, not exactly the same...Copy !req
321. - Yeah.
- ... but your consciousnessCopy !req
322. is then completely unbroken for eternity.Copy !req
323. From that point on,Copy !req
324. you can come into the physical realm
when, where, and how you choose,Copy !req
325. if you choose to do so.Copy !req
326. The point is to help other people
complete this process.Copy !req
327. You know, Beethoven said
that the point of being alive,Copy !req
328. the point of being human,Copy !req
329. is to approach divinity
as closely as you possibly canCopy !req
330. and then disseminate those rays
out to mankind.Copy !req
331. - Oh—
Hold that thought.Copy !req
332. May the light protect him.Copy !req
333. Why... ay-ay-ay-ay!Copy !req
334. What?Copy !req
335. Behold the death of the old eon...Copy !req
336. and the birth of the new.Copy !req
337. What the fuck, Darryl? I was asleep!Copy !req
338. Well, it was time to wake up
to the truth, Barry!Copy !req
339. Oh, so ruining my marriage
wasn't enough, huh?Copy !req
340. You ruined your own
fucking marriage, Barry.Copy !req
341. I just want to hear you say it.
Say you fucked my wife!Copy !req
342. You never woke up!Copy !req
343. Oh, shit.Copy !req
344. I was sleeping, you bastard!Copy !req
345. You were asleep.
You never woke the fuck up!Copy !req
346. I'm gonna fuck you up for that.Copy !req
347. You were napping,
bringing rocks to lifeCopy !req
348. - like some kind of dick.Copy !req
349. I looked out for her!
That's what this is about?Copy !req
350. You were the one going to Lad's,
getting lap dances at Lad's all the time.Copy !req
351. I had a platinum membership!
Guys!Copy !req
352. You don't just get those.
That took years to earn!Copy !req
353. Fucking fight and shut up!
Guys!Copy !req
354. Now I'm the one
who's supposed to shut the fuck up.Copy !req
355. You didn't even try to—Copy !req
356. Classic...Copy !req
357. You have seen destiny is on my side!Copy !req
358. Sometimes saying revealing
and honest things—Copy !req
359. But it makes me a beautiful person.Copy !req
360. Oh, my God.Copy !req
361. Oh, my God. Yes! Yes!Copy !req
362. Ow! Fuck!Copy !req
363. Yes!Copy !req
364. I love you.Copy !req
365. Thank you so much!Copy !req
366. Thank you!Copy !req
367. Blessed be this cone
that it may make a new friend.Copy !req
368. Shirts. Stickers. Cream.Copy !req
369. Awesome!Copy !req
370. Aw, thanks, Clancy. This is sick, man.
Look at this swag grab.Copy !req
371. Hell, yeah, I got some stickers, pens...
Wait a second, there's two shirts here?Copy !req
372. What size is this?
Extra-medium? Come on!Copy !req
373. Ice cream...Copy !req
374. This tongue's about to get cold.Copy !req
375. Shout out to Clancy for this frosty cone.Copy !req
376. - Dad, no!Copy !req
377. I was just having some ice cream, Dad. No!Copy !req
378. - You pig!Copy !req
379. Sun and the wind, I smite you!Copy !req
380. Shit.Copy !req
381. Chirp.Copy !req