1. In here!Copy !req
2. What's the emergency?Copy !req
3. Can you open this for me?Copy !req
4. - You called 9-1-1 because you
couldn't open a can of tuna?Copy !req
5. No. First I called Bugs.Copy !req
6. Then I called my girlfriend,Copy !req
7. And then I called Porky.Copy !req
8. Then I called 9-1-1.Copy !req
9. The Looney Tunes ShowCopy !req
10. Season 2, Episode 12
"Dear John"Copy !req
11. - "Dear Edmund,
I'm leaving you."Copy !req
12. Ohh!Copy !req
13. I don't get it.Copy !req
14. - What? Then why
were you crying?Copy !req
15. - I always cry
when I'm confused.Copy !req
16. What didn't you get?Copy !req
17. Well, why was he so upset?Copy !req
18. - Because
of the Dear John letter.Copy !req
19. - John? ok,
I thought his name was Edmund.Copy !req
20. - No, it's just called
a Dear John letterCopy !req
21. When someone ends
the relationship with a noteCopy !req
22. Instead of face to face.Copy !req
23. Ohh, ok.Copy !req
24. So this was a sad movie.Copy !req
25. Hey, then why was I
laughing so much during it?Copy !req
26. I have no idea. Come on.Copy !req
27. - Oh, I can't go anywhere.
Now that I know what's going on,Copy !req
28. I want to see it again.Copy !req
29. - Can you believe
they charged meCopy !req
30. For coming out to the house?Copy !req
31. it says you called 9-1-1Copy !req
32. Four times in the past week.Copy !req
33. And none of the emergencies
were valid.Copy !req
34. Oh, they were valid.Copy !req
35. Will you hand me that towel?Copy !req
36. Will you tell me
a bedtime story?Copy !req
37. Scarf, or no scarf?Copy !req
38. Why do they get to decide
if it's an emergency or not?Copy !req
39. - Daffy, our emergency services
are under fundedCopy !req
40. And overextended as it is.Copy !req
41. Our property taxes
aren't high enough.Copy !req
42. - Why do you know
so much about it?Copy !req
43. - Because
I'm on the City Council.Copy !req
44. What's the City Council?Copy !req
45. - The elected body
that runs the city.Copy !req
46. So you're like a big wig?Copy !req
47. maybe to some people.Copy !req
48. - How long have you been
on the City Council?Copy !req
49. - I'm about to finish
my third term.Copy !req
50. - How did I never
know this about you?Copy !req
51. - Because you never ask me
anything about myself.Copy !req
52. And when I try to tell you
anything, you interrupt me.Copy !req
53. And then on the few occasions where
I actually do get to say something,Copy !req
54. You literally
fall asleep from boredom.Copy !req
55. - Hey, I'm meeting Tina
for date night.Copy !req
56. - Uh, why is the microwave
not working?Copy !req
57. - Oh. I tried to open
a can of tuna with it.Copy !req
58. I thought if I got it hot
enough, the top would pop off.Copy !req
59. - Daffy, you can't put metal
in the microwave.Copy !req
60. Well, I know that now, ok?Copy !req
61. The lesson's been learned,
all right?Copy !req
62. I'll never forget it.Copy !req
63. Real quick—you can or cannot
put metal in the microwave?Copy !req
64. Pizzariba, this is Speedy.Copy !req
65. - Hey, Speedy, who is that
handyman you use at the restaurant?Copy !req
66. - You mean John?
Oh, he's the best.Copy !req
67. You want me to call him for you?Copy !req
68. - That would be great.
The microwave's broken.Copy !req
69. No problem. I'll have him
drop by tomorrow.Copy !req
70. Just leave him a note.
- Thanks, Speedy.Copy !req
71. - Hey, Bugs!
I saw that movie again.Copy !req
72. Oh, you were right,
it was a Dear John letter.Copy !req
73. Oh, so sad.Copy !req
74. I hardly laughed
at all this time.Copy !req
75. - Dear John,
this isn't working. Bugs.Copy !req
76. Oh, no!Copy !req
77. A Dear John letter?Copy !req
78. Bugs broke up with me!Copy !req
79. Why?Copy !req
80. - I'm sorry, sir, we're
completely booked this evening.Copy !req
81. You didn't make a reservation?Copy !req
82. - Don't worry.
I'll handle this.Copy !req
83. Ahem. You do know
that I'm a close,Copy !req
84. Personal friend of Porky Pig?Copy !req
85. Ah, that's City Council member
Porky Pig.Copy !req
86. Ooh.Copy !req
87. - Who knew there were perks
to being friends with Porky Pig?Copy !req
88. Good-bye, apartment.Copy !req
89. I've decided to go away
for a while.Copy !req
90. Too many memories here.Copy !req
91. Ew! Oh, no, no, uh-uh, no.Copy !req
92. Uh-uh. Just because I'm leaving
doesn't mean youCopy !req
93. And all your little insect friends
can come in here and crawl around.Copy !req
94. Ok, you hear that, roaches?Copy !req
95. I'm talking to you, too,
spiders and ants.Copy !req
96. All of you. You stay out
of this apartment!Copy !req
97. And in case you need
a reminder,Copy !req
98. I'm putting a note
on the front door.Copy !req
99. - Uh, Daffy, have you been
going all over townCopy !req
100. Saying you're friends with me?Copy !req
101. - Yes. And the results
are incredible.Copy !req
102. I used to be embarrassed
to admit I even knew you.Copy !req
103. But just this morning,
I threw your name aroundCopy !req
104. And I got a lifetime
gym membership for free!Copy !req
105. It wasn't for free.Copy !req
106. You told the girl
who worked thereCopy !req
107. That the city would have
a parade in her honor.Copy !req
108. - So? You're on
the City Council.Copy !req
109. - You told the Maitre'd
at the Sunset RoomCopy !req
110. That I'd name
a highway after him.Copy !req
111. - Well, it got me
a really good table.Copy !req
112. You told that traffic copCopy !req
113. That I could grant
his uncle's citizenship!Copy !req
114. What's wrong with that?Copy !req
115. This is the greatest country
on earth.Copy !req
116. - It's unethical!
There's a reelection coming up,Copy !req
117. And this makes it look like
I could be bribed!Copy !req
118. - I understand.
It won't happen again.Copy !req
119. Porky Pig voted not once,Copy !req
120. But twice to make
our city dirtier.Copy !req
121. He voted to eliminate
garbage collection.Copy !req
122. He voted three times
to allow dumping in the river.Copy !req
123. Why would a City Councilman
do such a thing?Copy !req
124. Because he's a pig.Copy !req
125. And pigs are filthy.Copy !req
126. On election day, let's send
this pig back to the farm.Copy !req
127. Vote Daffy Duck
for City Council.Copy !req
128. - I'm Daffy Duck,
and I approve this message.Copy !req
129. - What was that?
- An attack ad.Copy !req
130. But those are all lies!Copy !req
131. - It doesn't matter.
Now people are going to haveCopy !req
132. Negative associations with you.Copy !req
133. - I can't believe
you're running against me!Copy !req
134. - You're the one who said I
can't use your name to get perks.Copy !req
135. So, fine.
I'll get 'em myself.Copy !req
136. How could you do this?Copy !req
137. - First, you don't want me
telling people you're my friend.Copy !req
138. Now you don't want me
telling people you're my enemy?Copy !req
139. Porky, you're a real
flip flopper.Copy !req
140. Ooh. I'll put that
in my next attack ad.Copy !req
141. - I didn't know
where else to go.Copy !req
142. I can't stop thinking
about that Dear John letter.Copy !req
143. Oh, I just need
some peace and quiet.Copy !req
144. You'll find that here.Copy !req
145. True healing occurs
when one is clear of mindCopy !req
146. And calm of spirit.Copy !req
147. - Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah,
I totally agree with that.Copy !req
148. Your path is meditation.Copy !req
149. Mm-hmm. Ok.Copy !req
150. - And the key to meditation
is silence.Copy !req
151. - Say what now?
- A vow of silence.Copy !req
152. For the next year,
you shall not speak.Copy !req
153. You know, I bet I could achieve all
that healing stuff without the silence.Copy !req
154. What do you think?Copy !req
155. - I'm afraid the silence
is necessary.Copy !req
156. - What I'm really quiet?
Does that count?Copy !req
157. - what about
now? What if I'm this quiet?Copy !req
158. No one will even know
I'm talking.Copy !req
159. Sorry, no. Not a word.Copy !req
160. - Well, what about sounds?
Are they allowed?Copy !req
161. Like, when I'm surprised.
I'd go, whoa!Copy !req
162. Or when I'm bored,
I'd be likeCopy !req
163. d Deedaleelee,
Deedaleedeedee dCopy !req
164. - Silence.
- Wow.Copy !req
165. Ok.Copy !req
166. Oh, that felt good. Sorry.Copy !req
167. I just had to get that last one
out of my system.Copy !req
168. - Newcomer Daffy Duck
has won a seatCopy !req
169. On the City Council,Copy !req
170. Defeating the incumbent
Porky Pig.Copy !req
171. Once again,
negative campaignsCopy !req
172. Proved their effectiveness.Copy !req
173. Ohh! I won!Copy !req
174. I won, I won, I won!Copy !req
175. Let the perks begin!Copy !req
176. Shh, shh.Copy !req
177. Oh! I keep getting
her voicemail.Copy !req
178. I haven't heard from Lola
in three days.Copy !req
179. I'm going over there.Copy !req
180. - Someone's going to need
new business cards.Copy !req
181. I bet I can get 'em for free.Copy !req
182. "Dear Bugs,Copy !req
183. I don't ever want
to see you again!"Copy !req
184. Lola broke up with me?Copy !req
185. Hey.Copy !req
186. Ooh, great.Copy !req
187. Oh, yeah, that's nice.
Good heighth on that.Copy !req
188. The Royal Oaks-Glen Oaks-Oakwood Oaks
City Council meeting is now in session.Copy !req
189. We open up the floor
to new business.Copy !req
190. Yes, I have a complaint.Copy !req
191. It's regarding the number
on the curb.Copy !req
192. The paint is—Copy !req
193. - How long does these things
usually go?Copy !req
194. There's an "Off-Duty Cop"
marathon on tonightCopy !req
195. And I'd like
to get home for it.Copy !req
196. I can't record it
because I broke the DVRCopy !req
197. Trying to open a can of tuna.Copy !req
198. - The meetings
are scheduled for five hours,Copy !req
199. But they sometimes run long.Copy !req
200. - ... But then that paint
faded as well.Copy !req
201. So, I would like to talk
about the kind of paintCopy !req
202. That this city uses
for addresses.Copy !req
203. Because clearly...Copy !req
204. Oh, come on!Copy !req
205. Is this really happening?Copy !req
206. What does she care
if someone can read her address?Copy !req
207. I've lived across the street
from her for six years.Copy !req
208. She hasn't had
a single visitor.Copy !req
209. Just remember why you're here.Copy !req
210. The perks.Copy !req
211. This will be worth it,
because of the perks.Copy !req
212. I like periwinkle,Copy !req
213. But I think that would be
a very bad choice.Copy !req
214. So in conclusion,
I propose a special committeeCopy !req
215. To discuss paint quality,Copy !req
216. Paint color,
and paint placement.Copy !req
217. Thank you.Copy !req
218. - Thank you. And that
concludes the new business.Copy !req
219. Finally.Copy !req
220. And now onto old business.Copy !req
221. Concerning the speed reduction
on Maple Drive,Copy !req
222. I believe the choice
was between speed bumpsCopy !req
223. And speed humps.Copy !req
224. - Is that right,
Councilmember Bowls?Copy !req
225. - Yes, Mr. Chairman.
Speed bumps are conical,Copy !req
226. While speed humps are ovoid.Copy !req
227. - Councilmember Duck,
what are your thoughtsCopy !req
228. On speed bumps
versus speed humps?Copy !req
229. - My thoughts?
You want my thoughts, huh?Copy !req
230. My thoughts are that
you people are all insane!Copy !req
231. You let that old lady talk
for three hours,Copy !req
232. And she never said anything!Copy !req
233. In the amount of time
that that took,Copy !req
234. I could have gone over thereCopy !req
235. And painted her address myself!Copy !req
236. I could have painted
the Sistine Chapel!Copy !req
237. I don't know about you people,Copy !req
238. But I have better things
to do with my timeCopy !req
239. Than talk about whether
something is conical or ovoid!Copy !req
240. Ovoid!Copy !req
241. Now if you'll excuse me,
I have somethingCopy !req
242. That I need to get back to,Copy !req
243. And it's called a life.Copy !req
244. Unbelievable.Copy !req
245. Bunch of namby pambies.Copy !req
246. Ronald Reagan was right.Copy !req
247. Oh, hey, I'm supposedCopy !req
248. To meet Porky at Pizzariba.
You want to come?Copy !req
249. - I don't ever want
to see you again!Copy !req
250. - There's nothing
here for me anymore.Copy !req
251. - So you don't want to come
to Pizzariba?Copy !req
252. No perk is worth
sitting through that drivel!Copy !req
253. I mean, is there really a difference
between speed bumps and speed humps?Copy !req
254. - Well, one is conical
and one is ovoid, and—Copy !req
255. How long do I have to be
a City Council member?Copy !req
256. A term is four years.Copy !req
257. - Four years?
I can't do four years, man!Copy !req
258. Ooh!Copy !req
259. Someone just forwarded me
a video.Copy !req
260. - Is that the baby playing
piano? Already saw it. Fake.Copy !req
261. - Um... You might
want to see this.Copy !req
262. My toughts
are that you peopleCopy !req
263. Are all insane!Copy !req
264. You let that old lady
talk for three hours—Copy !req
265. - You better hope
no one sees this.Copy !req
266. You could get thrown off
the City Council.Copy !req
267. - In the amount of time
that that took,Copy !req
268. I could have gone over there
and painted her address myself!Copy !req
269. I could have painted
the Sistine Chapel!Copy !req
270. This isn't good.Copy !req
271. Or, is it great?Copy !req
272. - Hey, man,
I saw that video of youCopy !req
273. At the City Council meeting.Copy !req
274. - I know what
you're going to say,Copy !req
275. And I owe you and all of you,Copy !req
276. My constituents, an apology.Copy !req
277. But, obviously,
apologies are not enough.Copy !req
278. And you the voters
will undoubtedlyCopy !req
279. Want to remove me from office,Copy !req
280. Which I will accept.Copy !req
281. Though with a heavy heart.Copy !req
282. - Are you kidding me?
What you did was great!Copy !req
283. Say what?Copy !req
284. - You are the opposite
of a politician.Copy !req
285. You can't hide what you are
feeling. You just say it!Copy !req
286. You're a breath of fresh air!Copy !req
287. We're so lucky to have you
on that City Council.Copy !req
288. We need you there,
forever and always!Copy !req
289. Am I right?Copy !req
290. - Ok, so what kind of permits
do I needCopy !req
291. To put an addition
on the kitchen?Copy !req
292. It would extend it
to the parking lot,Copy !req
293. And I would require some digging.
So I think we needCopy !req
294. To talk about
construction permits, as well.Copy !req
295. Lola, it has been a year.Copy !req
296. Your vow of silence
is fulfilled.Copy !req
297. You should feel a deep
and lasting peace.Copy !req
298. You may now speak.
What do you have to say?Copy !req
299. I miss Bugs!Copy !req
300. Hey, one more thing—Copy !req
301. Hmm.Copy !req
302. Now... Here?Copy !req
303. I don't know where
these speed bumps go!Copy !req
304. - What? You people
can't come to my home!Copy !req
305. I'm not a City Councilman
24 hours a day.Copy !req
306. Oh. Hey, Lola.Copy !req
307. - Where's Bugs?
I have to be with himCopy !req
308. Whether he wants me or not.Copy !req
309. I don't know where Bugs is.Copy !req
310. He left a long time ago.Copy !req
311. - What are you talking about?
- He got your Dear John letterCopy !req
312. And was completely devastated
and said something aboutCopy !req
313. Sailing to the end
of the world.Copy !req
314. - What? How could Bugs have
possibly thought this was for him?Copy !req
315. Ohh. I'm coming for you, Bugs!Copy !req
316. And this time I'm talking
about the rabbit Bugs!Copy !req
317. Meeting adjourned.Copy !req
318. - That was another
fun five hours.Copy !req
319. What are you doing here?Copy !req
320. - Just because I can't be
on the City CouncilCopy !req
321. Doesn't mean I can't
come to the meetings.Copy !req
322. - We really do
have nothing in common.Copy !req
323. - Did you hear about Prop 14?
- What's Prop 14?Copy !req
324. - They're calling it
the Daffy Duck Provision.Copy !req
325. You're so popular,Copy !req
326. The voters want
to make your seatCopy !req
327. On the City Council permanent.Copy !req
328. - Then there's only one thing
left to do.Copy !req
329. - Embrace a life
dedicated to public service?Copy !req
330. No. Fake my own death.Copy !req
331. - Tragedy struck today
when popular City CouncilmanCopy !req
332. Daffy Duck lost control
of his vehicleCopy !req
333. And plunged into the icy
Sebastian river.Copy !req
334. All that was recovered
was his beloved parade float.Copy !req
335. And the city never even got
to throw him a parade.Copy !req
336. Former Councilman Porky PigCopy !req
337. Has agreed to fulfill
the remainder of his term.Copy !req
338. This is Elmer J. Fudd reporting.Copy !req
339. hey, Porky.Copy !req
340. Want some gently used
business cards?Copy !req
341. I'll put a speed bump hereCopy !req
342. And the speed hump here.Copy !req
343. Oh, no. Oh, maybe
the speed hump goes thereCopy !req
344. And the speed bump goes here.Copy !req
345. Bugs!Copy !req
346. Bugs!Copy !req
347. Bugs!Copy !req
348. Lola?Copy !req
349. Whoa-oh!Copy !req
350. Ohh.Copy !req
351. Wait. What are you doing here?Copy !req
352. You broke up with me!Copy !req
353. That note wasn't to you.Copy !req
354. It was to spiders
and ants and roaches.Copy !req
355. Don't you see?
I wrote "Dear Bugs",Copy !req
356. But you thought I meant
"Dear Bugs".Copy !req
357. Bugs.Copy !req
358. I need to be with you.Copy !req
359. I don't care about
the Dear John letterCopy !req
360. You left me on the microwave.Copy !req
361. Dear John letter?Copy !req
362. You mean the repairman?Copy !req
363. - Wait. Why'd you break up
with the repairman?Copy !req
364. - Mwah!
- Mwah!Copy !req
365. - Oh, Tosh?
- Yes, Chum?Copy !req
366. - Would you like to split
this tangerine soda?Copy !req
367. - Actually, I never have
carbonation in the afternoon.Copy !req
368. - I should have known that.
Terribly sorry.Copy !req
369. - No apology, Chum.
Let me cut you a sliceCopy !req
370. Of this nice zucchini bread.Copy !req
371. - Oh, no.
I'm gluten intolerant.Copy !req
372. - Oh, of course you are.
I should have known that.Copy !req
373. - Well, I shouldn't have
thoughtlessly offered you that soda.Copy !req
374. - What is happening to us?
- I don't know!Copy !req
375. It's like we're...Copy !req
376. - Not on the same page.
- Out of synch.Copy !req
377. d we're drifting apart dCopy !req
378. d our friendship is broken dCopy !req
379. - d indubitably,
we've made mistakes dCopy !req
380. d how much is unspoken dCopy !req
381. d inexorably dCopy !req
382. d last week I wanted to watch dCopy !req
383. d our favorite cooking show dCopy !req
384. d but you left the room
to watch women's tennis dCopy !req
385. d that was really
quite a blow dCopy !req
386. - d when we were eating
at the palace over thyme dCopy !req
387. d I ordered you potato chips dCopy !req
388. d but you said
you wanted fries dCopy !req
389. d well, I like french fries dCopy !req
390. - d since when
do you like french fries? dCopy !req
391. d we're driftin' apart dCopy !req
392. - d the sweater I bought you
doesn't match your skin tone dCopy !req
393. d we're driftin' apart dCopy !req
394. - d I made you captain of the
class with your throw rug dCopy !req
395. - d it's like we are two sides
of a very tainted coin dCopy !req
396. d without you I feel like Béarnaise
sauce without the top sirloin dCopy !req
397. - d I don't know why this friendship
train has suddenly derailed dCopy !req
398. d we used to be two snowflakes dCopy !req
399. d now we're just
two chunks of hail dCopy !req
400. - d and as that hail
hurtles toward earth dCopy !req
401. d they drift further apart dCopy !req
402. d they're like
two frozen daggers dCopy !req
403. d ripping through
my broken heart dCopy !req
404. - d those separate lonely
chunks of hail dCopy !req
405. d just falling to their doom dCopy !req
406. d they hit the room
with a sickening dCopy !req
407. d and the friendship
sonic boomed dCopy !req
408. - d I'm sorry
that I failed you dCopy !req
409. - d oh, no,
'tis I that failed you dCopy !req
410. Well, I better go.Copy !req
411. I have tickets to Michael Bublé!Copy !req
412. - What?
I have backstage passes!Copy !req
413. - You don't say!
- Shall we share a rickshaw?Copy !req
414. - Ooh, splendid.
I love rickshaws!Copy !req
415. Oh, so do I!Copy !req
416. d we're not drifting apart dCopy !req
417. d and we never shall again dCopy !req
418. d no more driftin' apart dCopy !req
419. - d we remain
the best of friends dCopy !req
420. d we're not drifting apart dCopy !req
421. - d there will be
no more strife dCopy !req
422. d no more driftin' apart dCopy !req
423. d best of egos alive dCopy !req
424. d we're not driftin' apart dCopy !req
425. - d I'm for you
and you're for me dCopy !req
426. d no more driftin' apart dCopy !req
427. d it's a friendship victory dCopy !req
428. d we're not driftin' apart dCopy !req
429. He was a great american hero.Copy !req