1. The only thing better than
a third cup of coffee?
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2. A full cup of coffee.
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3. - Come on, we're gonna be late!
- Late for what?
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4. - To meet Steve St. James.
- Who?
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5. Steve St. James! He was the off duty
cop on the hit show Off Duty Cop.
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6. That old TV show about the
detective and his butler?
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7. - Chauffeur.
- Why would a detective have a chauffeur?
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8. Because he was Steve St. James...
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9. the detective who couldn't let justice sleep
just because he was off duty...
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10. so he had a chauffeur drive him
around to make justice not sleep.
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11. I need another cup of coffee.
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12. Come on, he's making an
appearance at the mall.
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13. I can't. I got a doctor's appointment.
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14. What's wrong with you?
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15. Nothing. It's my yearly physical.
When was the last time you got one?
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16. Never. I've never been to the doctor.
I'm the picture of health.
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17. Ahh! My hip.
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18. Ooh! Ooh! What is that shooting pain?
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19. Numbness. Tingling. Cramping.
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20. Season 1 Episode 19 "Off Duty Cop".
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21. Original Air Date:
October 24, 2011 on Cartoon Network.
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22. Thanks for inviting me, Daffy.
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23. Isn't it funny how you're always available?
No matter how last second...
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24. you never have other plans.
Like you don't really have a life.
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25. Heh heh heh. Yeah, that is funny.
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26. Now, who's Steve St. James?
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27. Steve St. James. "Off Duty Cop."
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28. Give me your phone.
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29. - When are you gonna get a phone?
- Never.
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30. Cell phones are like doctors. The calling plans
are confusing, the buttons are too small.
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31. - But... Huh?
- Just watch this.
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32. Oh, is this the old show
about the detective and his butler?
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33. Ugh. Chauffeur.
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34. OK, I get it.
I don't need to see anymore.
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35. You're missing it.
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36. Yeah, give it to him, Steve.
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37. Does he headhunt everyone he meets?
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38. Shush.
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39. How long are these opening credits?
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40. Daffy, I get it. Give me my phone.
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41. So to answer your question,
that's Steve St. James.
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42. Steve St. James!
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43. Wow! I'm your biggest fan!
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44. Well, thank you very much.
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45. Would you like a signed copy of my book?
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46. Nah, books are like cell
phones and doctors...
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47. Takes forever to get an appointment
and I don't have insurance.
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48. - Will you sign my beak?
- Ugh.
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49. I can't see it. Sign his face.
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50. "Leslie Hunt"? Who's she?
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51. - I'm Leslie Hunt.
- You're Steve St. James.
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52. No, Steve St. James is a
character that I played on TV.
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53. - I'm Leslie Hunt.
- Who?
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54. I thought you said you were my biggest fan.
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55. I'm Steve St. James' biggest fan
and you're no Steve St. James.
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56. That's what I said.
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57. That's what I said.
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58. Ugh. I need a cup of coffee.
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59. Well, if he's not gonna be Steve St.
James, then I will.
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60. Daffy, that's stealing.
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61. You'd make a great chauffeur.
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62. Ahh.
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63. - Hello. Don't say it.
- What's up, doc?
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64. He said it.
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65. Are you OK? You seem a little jittery.
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66. Jittery? I'm not jittery. If anyone's jittery,
you're jittery. I'm not jittery.
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67. Ahh. So, do I have a clean bill of health?
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68. - Everything looks fine.
- Great. See you next year.
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69. Whoa. There is just one thing.
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70. I knew it!
I knew you were hiding something.
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71. How long do I have?
A year? A month? A day?
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72. Am I contagious? If I'm contagious,
then those people need to know.
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73. You owe it to them!
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74. I'm highly contagious!
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75. Run for your lives!
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76. Why didn't you tell me sooner?
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77. What kind of a doctor are you?
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78. You're probably not even a real doctor.
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79. Syracuse?
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80. That's a basketball school.
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81. I was just gonna say that I think you
should stop drinking coffee for a while.
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82. You have too much caffeine in your system.
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83. It's what's making you so tense.
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84. Oh. Cut out coffee. No problem.
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85. Ahem. You could probably just tape this.
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86. Oh, right. No caffeine.
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87. I'm sorry to bother you, but can I
just have 30 seconds of your time...
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88. to tell you about a product
that could change your life?
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89. Sam.
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90. This product differs from
other similar products...
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91. - ... because of it's unique ingredients.
- I'm not interested.
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92. It's like coffee, but without the caffeine.
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93. - What's like coffee?
- Spargle.
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94. While coffee leaves you feeling jittery,
Spargle will leave you feeling rested and alert.
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95. - When did you get into this racket?
- I needed money quick.
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96. They said they were gonna take my house.
I mean, I believe in the product.
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97. - Tastes weird.
- Those are the Spargle berries.
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98. Wow. Could this be working already?
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99. I don't know. You won't catch
me drinking that stuff.
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100. - I'll take them.
- How many?
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101. All of them.
- Cha-ching.
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102. I mean, it'll change your life.
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103. Where are we going, Daffy?
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104. I'm no longer, Daffy. I'm Steve St.
James, Off Duty Cop.
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105. And we're going wherever
justice is sleeping...
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106. and needs to be woken up by me,
Steve St. James, Off Duty Cop.
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107. So I just keep going straight?
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108. Pull over.
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109. No, park illegally.
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110. More illegally. Like you don't
have time to play by the rules.
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111. Ahem. Aren't you forgetting something?
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112. Oh, sorry.
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113. - Will you marry me?
Freeze.
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114. - But he was...
- I know what he was doing.
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115. He was stealing your ring and beautifully
placing it in this elegant box.
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116. - No, I was...
- Assaulting her.
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117. And that's a code 9.
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118. I'm might be off duty,
but I'm not off my game.
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119. Looks like your meter's expired.
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120. Call me if you have anymore trouble, ma'am.
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121. Day or night. Well, never before 11am.
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122. And don't call after 5:00. And also...
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123. when you call, it'll be my roommate's
voice on the answering machine.
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124. I don't know how to change it.
Also, I don't know how to access messages.
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125. So just keep calling. Anytime.
Day or night.
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126. Between 11:00 and 5:00. And not on weekends.
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127. I have so much energy. What to do?
What to do? What to do?
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128. It's early, but I guess
I could make dinner.
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129. Ha ha!
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130. Hmm. Now what?
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131. Oh, there's that book I
always wanted to write.
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132. The end.
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133. June. I don't think that's too early
to put up Christmas decorations.
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134. Merry Christmas!
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135. Well, I say that was a solid day's work.
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136. Wherever justice tried to sleep,
we were there to wake it up.
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137. Good work, chauffeur.
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138. Are you sure the chauffeur
doesn't have a name?
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139. Nope, just chauffeur.
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140. Why is your house covered
in Christmas decorations?
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141. Isn't it always like that?
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142. Oh, hi. Hey. I hope you don't mind,
I did a few things around the house.
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143. I painted the garage,
I resurfaced the swimming pool.
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144. Oh, and I moved everything that was
in your room into the kitchen.
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145. But if you don't like,
I can move it back, no problem.
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146. I just have 3 hours left on the treadmill.
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147. But after that, I definitely can move
your stuff back into your bedroom.
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148. Unless you want me to move it into the garage.
I just painted it.
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149. - Are you OK?
- Never better.
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150. Never, ever, ever better.
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151. Are you guys itchy?
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152. Huh. I like it. Closer to the fridge.
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153. So you're saying the chauffeur
was in every episode...
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154. and they never give him a name?
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155. I'll prove it to you.
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156. St. James, have your chauffeur
bring the car around?
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157. He's a human being, chief.
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158. He has a name. Brandon Steel.
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159. Use it. I do.
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160. Every time I address him.
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161. Oh, Brandon. Thank goodness you're here.
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162. Hmm. That was a stupid episode.
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163. Have you guys seen any Spargles
that still have Spargle in them?
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164. I'm all out of Spargle and I need some Spargle.
You know what I mean?
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165. - What is wrong with you?
- Nothing.
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166. There's nothing wrong with me.
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167. I gotta get more Spargle.
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168. Hee hee hee!
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169. Something tells me justice is
about to get a wake-up call.
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170. Where's the Spargle?
He's gotta have it somewhere. Where is it?
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171. I think it's here somewhere.
Where the Spargle? Where is it?
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172. What in tarnation are
you doing in my house?
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173. Oh, uh, I was just, uh,
I figured I'd stop by.
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174. I saw the window was unlocked. It seemed
like a great time to come over and hang out.
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175. I thought I was the only one who broke
into people's houses to hang out.
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176. Say, you know what goes well
with hanging out? Spargle.
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177. Do you have anymore Spargle? I
could really go for some Spargle.
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178. Don't got no more. You bought it all.
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179. What? But I really need it.
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180. I said I don't got no more.
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181. Well, you gotta hook it up.
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182. I guess I could take you to my supplier.
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183. Let's go now!
Fine. Let me throw on some jeans.
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184. I said now.
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185. I always knew Bugs was a criminal.
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186. Chauffeur, looks like we're
going for a little drive.
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187. Hello, darlin'. You probably know me.
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188. I'm a Spargle sales representative.
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189. We have a lot of sales representatives.
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190. Heh heh heh.
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191. Yeah, well, I bet you don't have a lot
that sell a month's supply in one day.
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192. - See that guy over there?
- The one talking to that plant?
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193. I moved one of the bedrooms
into the kitchen...
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194. but I think it would look better
in the garage. I just painted it.
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195. Well, thanks to him, your
company's about to get rich.
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196. And so am I, 'cause I get
4 cents on very can.
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197. Freeze! You're all under arrest.
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198. Daffy, do not blow this deal.
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199. My name is Steve St. James...
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200. and you're coming with me.
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201. I'm not going anywhere without my Spargle.
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202. Aah!
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203. Hey!
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204. Whoa!
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205. Uhh! Uhn.
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206. I just want my Spargle.
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207. - Put down the pen!
- Put down the stapler...
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208. or I'll write all over the pig's face!
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209. Why does everyone want to write on my face?
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210. - Just give my Spargle.
- Put down the pen!
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211. It's permanent ink!
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212. - I said give me my Spargle.
- Put it down!
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213. - Permanent!
- I'm not leaving here...
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214. until you give me my Spargle!
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215. - I said put it down!
- It won't come off!
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216. This is a place of business.
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217. These are hard-working people who
simply want to sell a quality product.
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218. What in tarnation is illegal about that?
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219. You're all under arrest.
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220. What's going on here?
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221. This whole operation's a scam.
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222. These things are filled with
dangerous, highly-addictive chemicals.
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223. How about but what about
the Spargle berries?
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224. Somebody get that guy to a doctor.
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225. Am I under arrest? I'm just an
innocent sales representative.
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226. That all depends. Did you know you
were selling a dangerous product?
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227. Thanks for helping out.
I'll take it from here.
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228. Who are you?
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229. Steve St. James, Off Duty Cop.
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230. Arrest this one, too.
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231. - What did I do?
- You've been impersonating a cop...
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232. and handcuffing people all over town.
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233. What about him? He's been
impersonating a chauffeur.
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234. That's not illegal. It's pathetic,
but it's not illegal.
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235. Get this guy out of my face.
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236. I'm putting you down as a witness,
so I'm gonna need your name, too.
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237. Brandon Steel.
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238. I'm just gonna put chauffeur.
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239. Beep beep.
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240. Beep beep.
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241. Well, the doctor says one cup
off coffee a day can't hurt.
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242. Ahem.
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243. Do you mind?
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244. That's all folks
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