The Larry Sanders Show 1x7

1. George Foreman: Thanks, Larry.

2. Good for you, George.

3. Good for you.

4. And never forget.

5. When you— when you wear out your left and your right,

6. you can always belly bump 'em.

7. So, I'm gonna belly bump 'em into the next century.

8. Now, George, I would like to really see you, in the ring

9. one time, hit someone with your stomach.

10. Come on. I do all the time.

11. No, um, when they— when they're in closer. That's what—

12. Do you ever really run at— Yeah, they— they rush me

13. and that's why they're afraid of me. They won't charge me.

14. They know I'll bump 'em.

15. Worst thing that you can do is box a left-hander.

16. Why is that? 'Cause they're put on backwards

17. as it is in the ring.

18. And they seem to just hit you,

19. when you just have your defense up,

20. they go and hit you in the wrong spots.

21. Now— And you charge them and you miss.

22. It's humiliating.

23. Uh, well, I mean, what if you were to

24. box— practice boxing in a mirror?

25. Would that prepare you properly?

26. That's a great idea.

27. I wasn't born— I never thought about that.

28. I wasn't born yesterday.

29. Who are you fighting next?

30. Uh...

31. I think I'm gonna take this guy here.

32. I heard he's gonna... Hank?

33. Hey now. Hank is getting ready to drop his contract,

34. so I may as well get him.

35. (indistinct) Well, wait a minute, first of all,

36. let me say for the fifth time this week that Hank

37. is not leaving the network.

38. He is in contract negotiations.

39. He is not leaving the show.

40. He's in contr— (applause)

41. He is in negotiations with the network,

42. and I'm sure that they will, uh,

43. work something out.

44. Yes, well, we— we hope they'll work something out,

45. but, uh, um, George, uh, you'll agree with me,

46. I don't think I should cave in, right?

47. No, not at all. Belly bump 'em.

48. Do something. (laughter)

49. Boy, oh, boy. What?

50. Chef Paul's gumbo was incredibly strong.

51. Oh, yeah? Hi, Shel. Oh, there's...

52. steam coming out of my ass, Artie.

53. I swear to god, every time we have

54. a chef on, does he have to make something?

55. Well, you can sit and talk to them.

56. Do you think that'd be less painful?

57. I— Nice show, boys! Nice show!

58. Shel, didn't see you there. Hey, Shel.

59. How are ya? How are ya? Hank still trying to steal you guys blind?

60. Well, at the moment, the latest demand

61. is a golf cart to drive around the studio.

62. Oh, poor, deluded bastard.

63. Shel, I don't want to hear any more about these negotiations.

64. Just resolve it, will you please?

65. Well, I wish I could tell you that it was resolved,

66. but Hank's being a little rough this time.

67. Says he's, uh, ready to leave the show.

68. Says he's got other offers.

69. You know— (laughs)

70. 'Cause basically that's exactly what you two guys do

71. when you're renegotiating your contract.

72. Now wait a minute, I had an offer last year.

73. Oh, take it easy.

74. Well, no, no, no, I had that offer.

75. I could've gone on after "Nightline."

76. Shel believes you. I— I don't know if he does, Artie.

77. Of course he does. Shel? Absolutely.

78. All right. But listen, I'm trying to make Hank a happy man,

79. but there's a financial line we cannot cross.

80. Oh, shit.

81. (coughs) Larry.

82. Oh, thank you, Artie.

83. Sorry, Shel. I'm so sorry.

84. I know how much you hate all this contract talk.

85. Oh, no, it's not you, Shel. It's that gumbo.

86. My dog wouldn't eat that shit. Oh, I'm sorry.

87. Hi. How are we?

88. Good stuff.

89. Hello, Mr. Davidoff.

90. Oh, please. Hank, it's Shel.

91. You've called me Shel for four years now.

92. Yeah, well, when it comes to business, I gotta call you Mr. Davidoff.

93. Don't take offense, Shel.

94. Come on, walk with me. I'm in a hurry.

95. Hank, supposing— just supposing...

96. Do you think that stain on the back of his pants

97. is from the gumbo?

98. I don't think so.

99. Syndication points, huh?

100. Here you go.

101. Do you think if I was 30 again that—

102. Artie, don't I have enough pressure on me

103. with everything, to have to worry about

104. what you were like when you were 30

105. and who you were dating?

106. Does the name Kim Novak mean anything to you?

107. (knocking) Get outta here.

108. Hey! Hank.

109. Uh, just cleaning out my, uh, office,

110. and I thought you, uh, you might want, uh, want this.

111. It's, um, autographed.

112. Yeah, but, uh, Kenny Stabler... Kenny Stabler.

113. played football. Yeah, I know he played...

114. um... Basketball?

115. Well, I— Yeah, I know.

116. But I mean, I just didn't have any spare footballs hanging around

117. when he was on the show... Right.

118. so it's the closest kind of ball

119. I could— I could find.

120. So, do you want it? Do...

121. Hell with it.

122. Hank, Hank, come on, Hank.

123. You don't need to play this

124. I'm-leaving-the-show game with me. Please.

125. Yeah, well, um...

126. Well, thank you for the kind words... Huh?

127. you said on the air tonight.

128. The sentiment really touched me.

129. And, uh...

130. my stepmother, who's watching in Pittsburgh.

131. Just, uh...

132. hope it wasn't lost in the boys of the network.

133. You should thank Artie anyway. He's the one who wrote it.

134. He just put it on the cards for me.

135. I just read it off the cards.

136. Uh, where it would've stayed had you not read it.

137. Well, glad I could help out.

138. Are you?

139. Of course I am, Hank.

140. Are ya?

141. Mm...

142. Wh— What the hell was that?

143. He was flexing a little muscle there.

144. Flexing his muscle?

145. Yeah. Hank Kingsley will never leave the show.

146. Yeah, but what does he think he's worth, for god sakes?

147. Oh, I have no idea.

148. How do you place a value on a man who introduces

149. Wynonna Judd as The Judd?

150. That was a low point even for him, wasn't it?

151. I'm surprised she came out. She was...

152. Jane Russell. Larry? Artie?

153. Yes? Were you who just talking about Hank?

154. No.

155. Oh, 'cause my ears were burning.

156. Anyway, the staff is having

157. a little going-away cake for Hank.

158. It would be nice if you could join us, okay?

159. Isn't he taking this a little seriously this time?

160. Oh, fuck it. It's free cake.

161. Gee. We can't miss this.

162. Oh, all right, all right. Come on.

163. Okay. This is gonna be great.

164. Okay, let me get him.

165. Shh, shh, shh, shh.

166. Okay. Shh, shh.

167. Hank?

168. (whispering) Everybody there? (whispering) Yes.

169. Is Larry there?

170. Yes. I got everyone.

171. Great.

172. Hold on. (hisses)

173. Yeah? White cake with coconut sprinkles?

174. Yes. Great. Okay.

175. Surprise! Surprise!

176. Come on!

177. What did you do? What is this?

178. Cake!

179. What did you do here?

180. Oh, man. Um...

181. well, um, ooh...

182. Uh, I-I— Well, I-I-I— I don't, um—

183. What can I say? Um...

184. Well, if— if someone invented a— a camera,

185. that could take, uh, you know, snapshots of our feelings,

186. I would— I would take—

187. I'd take a picture of this moment and, uh...

188. keep it in the, uh...

189. wallet of my heart forever.

190. Um...

191. knowing most of you— most of you...

192. has been a great pleasure, but the, uh, powers that be

193. want to put a price on, uh, what we have here,

194. and I'm— I'm afraid that that price is just too low.

195. And Hank Kingsley is not a man to— to cave in

196. on what is just.

197. I say he goes right into the cruise director's story after this.

198. Bet you 100 bucks it's the telethon story.

199. You're on.

200. You know, uh...

201. this reminds me of, uh, when I was a, uh...

202. just a— a cruise, uh, director...

203. All right! Shit.

204. on the Andropolis.

205. Now, the Andropolis— let me, uh, fill you in—

206. was a, uh, Greek liner. It was a, uh, luxury liner.

207. Oh!

208. What is this? Well, every time we have a going away party for you,

209. which is too much of a downer,

210. everyone goes home sad 'cause they don't wanna see you go, so...

211. So we, you know, we thought we'd spring

212. for something a little more fun.

213. (laughter) Well, I— I—

214. this is— I mean, this is too much.

215. I mean, thank you. I had no— I had no idea

216. that you and Paul could— Phil.

217. Phil could, uh, be so so openly expressive

218. about your affection. Thank you. I'm very touched.

219. Surprise!

220. Whoo! Hi!

221. Whoa! Watch out, watch out.

222. Whoo!

223. Oh, hey, hey. This is great.

224. Whoo!

225. All right! Whoo! Hubba, hubba, hubba!

226. Hank.

227. Uh— uh, Barbara?

228. Well...

229. uh, it's very nice to meet you.

230. (scoffs) Meet me?

231. You've done a hell of a lot more than meet me.

232. Hey now. (laughs nervously)

233. You asshole! (softly) Okay, okay.

234. That number you gave me was to some dry cleaners in Torrance!

235. Yeah, yeah, the area code got changed.

236. I don't know how come— Oh, bullshit!

237. Mm. I am not your whore.

238. Okay.

239. Ah.

240. Who needs this gig anyhow?

241. No, no, no, no, that's fine.

242. You know, it's just a— a...

243. Damn.

244. People see ya in enough of those law furniture spots,

245. they, uh, tend to fantasize about you. Yeah.

246. Come on, come on, who wants cake, huh?

247. Come on! Cake!

248. Cake, cake! Come on! Come on! Come on, Artie.

249. Step up! Hey, you two! Come on!

250. This is what— does the LXE—

251. is— is it different than the other, uh—

252. Does it have a limited slip deferential? Uh-huh. Huh?

253. Limited slip differential.

254. Does the LXE have a limited slip differential?

255. Uh-huh, well, if it's not available,

256. is it— Is it an option?

257. Is it?

258. Is it an option? Is it an option?

259. The, uh, limited sl—

260. No. No.

261. So— Ask about the next model.

262. What if— Does it have a— Does— Huh?

263. The next model up.

264. Can I talk? Can I?

265. Okay.

266. Does the next model have the limited slip differential?

267. It doesn't.

268. Well, let me— Can— Let me ask you this.

269. What— what is this limited slip differential? Of course.

270. Listen, when you're up on a curb, you know,

271. you have—

272. Why do I need this car anyway?

273. I already have a car. 'Cause you deserve it.

274. It's safer and it's classier.

275. I know he's right, I know he's right.

276. May I call you back?

277. Yeah, the—

278. Maury Povich, yeah.

279. Th— thank you.

280. Well? Big fan.

281. The other part. What?

282. What about it? Are you gonna get it? I don't know.

283. Silver. That's all I know.

284. I want a silver car.

285. That's all I—

286. What about Hank now?

287. He wants to see you alone.

288. Alone? What about Artie?

289. I'll go check.

290. Don't worry, Darlene. I was just leaving.

291. Don't leave me alone with Hank.

292. Oh, I'll be listening on the speaker phone.

293. I'll be with you spiritually.

294. Yeah.

295. Huh? Wanna see me?

296. Yeah. Want a Coke or something?

297. Sure. If you want me to have a Coke, I'll have a Coke.

298. Good. Ones on the, uh, top are cold—

299. I got it. Okay.

300. Talked to Shel recently.

301. About, uh, anything in particular?

302. No, about my hair weave.

303. About my leaving.

304. Oh.

305. Come on, Hank.

306. Come on.

307. You're not leaving.

308. I know you're not going. Jeez.

309. You know, in fact, uh, Hank, what I was thinking was, uh...

310. next— next year when we go—

311. when we have, uh, the going away party,

312. let Artie and I take care of the strippers

313. because we can probably find one that doesn't know ya.

314. Okay.

315. Okay, good. Come on, let's go.

316. Come on.

317. A woman I, uh, happen to have,

318. uh, met, uh, pops out of a, uh, very large present.

319. That's good. Come on.

320. Come on, let's make fun of her. All right, okay.

321. Hank, I'm sorry. I can't be any more— No, no. In fact,

322. why don't you just laugh in my face?

323. I mean, you might as well do it now.

324. You and Artie do it every time I turn my back!

325. That is not true, Hank.

326. She was half The Judds!

327. Now there's just one of them!

328. So, she's a— she is a Judd!

329. She is a single Judd!

330. Mother was ill... (slam)

331. What about the time I-I-I-I— I chipped, uh,

332. my— my tooth on the bathroom urinal?

333. Huh? What the fuck is so comical about that?

334. It was a back tooth, Hank.

335. I don't know how you did it.

336. All right.

337. No, no, no, it's my fault.

338. I really shouldn't be so angry about this.

339. Look... Because you know what I'm really feeling?

340. It hurts.

341. Yeah.

342. No, you don't understand.

343. It hurts me... Hank.

344. when you guys do this. Listen to me.

345. You've had a, uh, really long week

346. with this negotiation.

347. I— I think you're overreacting a little.

348. (sniffs) You cut one?

349. What the f—

350. What the hell is— What the hell was that?

351. Huh?

352. Phew.

353. Well, you let one go, boy.

354. Hello. It was the speakerphone.

355. (both laugh) Nice try.

356. Nice try.

357. No, someone is listening to our conversation

358. on the speakerphone.

359. You think someone's on the speakerphone?

360. Is someone on the speakerphone?

361. Is— Is someone listening, god dammit?

362. It's me, Larry. Arthur.

363. Artie, what are you doing on the speaker phone?

364. Oh, are you there with Hank?

365. Artie?

366. I'm sitting right here with Hank in my office.

367. How did you get on the phone?

368. I don't know.

369. I— I have no idea how I got on the phone.

370. I was eating a sandwich in my office

371. and, well, suddenly I heard you guys.

372. Well, Artie, you clearly must have hit your elbow

373. against the button and we— and you— you—

374. you're now on the speaker phone.

375. Oh, maybe, maybe.

376. But how's my old buddy Hank?

377. We were in the middle of a conversation.

378. I'm gonna have to hang up on you now, Artie.

379. Gotcha.

380. That's the kind of shit I'm talking about.

381. I'm not gonna take it anymore.

382. Will— Will you let me explain?

383. No, I won't. It's too late, my friend.

384. I'm tired.

385. Tired of, uh, being your personal village idiot.

386. I'll see you later.

387. Tell us about your, uh... Robin Williams: Oh, baby?

388. Your baby. My— I have a— a new baby who is eight months old

389. who's, like, pretty amazing.

390. I mean... (applause)

391. Thank you.

392. I don't know. I— I— They're happy for you.

393. I don't know if they're happy for me for me...

394. Well, you're— or they're going, "Oh, it's wonderful."

395. I don't know what it is. I didn't actually have the baby,

396. but my wife did. I mean, be different

397. if men carried the baby, wouldn't it?

398. We'd be going like, "Yeah! I got things to do! Get it out!

399. Yeah, right! Okay, yeah, okay, I see it. Come on."

400. Listen, we're gonna— Let us take a break

401. and we'll come back after this— this commercial

402. and we'll do more. Okay.

403. Is that okay? No, it's all right. That's okay.

404. Okay. We'll be right back. We'll be right back.

405. You turn that dial, you're dead! Don't go away.

406. Clear!

407. Delightful, Robin. Delightful.

408. Sir, your mind is a national treasure. Thanks.

409. Enough with the bullshit. How am I really doing? Huh?

410. How did I do? What? You did great.

411. You did great, man. What are you doing? Yeah?

412. Yeah, I mean, you're Robin Williams for god sakes.

413. Are you unaware of that? No.

414. If I was you, I'd never ask how I was doing.

415. Really? You were great.

416. Come on. Oh, man.

417. Come on. If you were me, you wouldn't be wearing this suit I guess.

418. Stop it. The suit is great. Really?

419. I don't look like an Irish pimp?

420. Well, I didn't say that. I know.

421. I'm sorry I was mean to Hank.

422. You weren't mean to Hank. Yeah, I was.

423. No one knows what that line is anymore.

424. I don't know what the deal is.

425. Really? It's just so— Hank and I—

426. it's so easy.

427. Hank— Hank is sensitive. I don't— I can't tell you

428. what you should and shouldn't do with Hank.

429. We're going through a thing right now, as a matter of fact.

430. It's just too damn easy. He looks like a before for Hair Club.

431. I— I can't go with you on that.

432. I cannot. I'm... Um... you guys—

433. Can I ask you a question? It's just I got to, I got to. No problem.

434. And— I— I never do this, but, uh, can you, uh,

435. autograph this for my niece? Oh, sure. Yeah.

436. Jennifer. She's six years old and— Jennifer.

437. "Best wishes" or... Peter Pan.

438. What? Peter Pan, Mork.

439. Whatever. Or any— whatever.

440. Mork. Okay. Whatever you want. Okay.

441. Want me to sign that?

442. (chuckles) Want me...

443. I'm sorry I was in your face tonight.

444. I'm really sorry. No, what, are you kidding?

445. I mean, uh, what— when you said that...

446. my head reminded you of, uh, your penis

447. after a cold swim, I was— I was honored.

448. I mean, I— I think I would be a perfect, uh, foil for you.

449. I mean that. You are. For anyone. You're wonderful.

450. Thank you. What's that about?

451. What is that about?

452. If I had said that to you, you would've been pissed off.

453. No, I'm insulted. Okay. Just—

454. Yeah, well, you see, there's a— a difference.

455. You see, uh, uh, number one... It's "Mork" with a "K."

456. Right, it was on— it was on stage, you see.

457. Number two, Robin isn't, uh, supposed to be a friend of mine.

458. Uh, number three, he didn't do it behind my back,

459. and number four, all the time.

460. You know what? Okay.

461. This is not— Thank you.

462. You're welcome. It's great.

463. Tension.

464. You should work this out,

465. go to see somebody together.

466. Do you think I should continue with my kid's penis?

467. Do you think I should talk about that?

468. Why don't you do the... It looks good.

469. Go into the ass-hunt then we'll talk about why you got the beard.

470. Okay, I guess.

471. Hey, listen, you're not gonna do Arsenio or Leno, are ya?

472. I've got to.

473. Fucker.

474. Hey, it's the business. Get used to it. Blow me.

475. Welcome back.

476. We are back with...

477. Robin Williams and, uh...

478. when we left...

479. when we left, we were talking about, uh...

480. uh, your... baby.

481. Yes, uh, baby, and, uh...

482. Eight months old? Eight months old, yeah.

483. And? He's wonderful.

484. Yes. And he's hung like a field mouse.

485. He's, uh... (laughter)

486. I mean, you pop the diaper and ping!

487. (laughs) It's like a little sundial. Look.

488. It's amazing.

489. It's like you're going... (whistles) "Whoa, yes."

490. Honey, what time is it? Get the baby. Get the baby.

491. Look, it's 3:00.

492. Oh, oh, it's 2:30 now. It's real cold.

493. Well, I hear what you're saying.

494. I mean, I agree. I mean...

495. you're one of the greats.

496. I mean, hell, man.

497. You're a legend.

498. But things are tough out there, kid.

499. Times are bad and the trend in talk shows today

500. is not to have a sidekick.

501. Yeah, it is a dying art.

502. But I've been having talks with Dick Cavett

503. about the possibility of a co-host.

504. Cavett? What's he doing?

505. What's he doing, Artie?

506. He has his own talk show on CNBC.

507. CNBC? What the hell's that?

508. What's that mean?

509. Don't you know?

510. No. My TV stops at channel 13

511. the way it's supposed to.

512. What I'm trying to tell you is that

513. as far as sidekicks go, it's not exactly...

514. a seller's market.

515. Artie?

516. I'm not going anywhere.

517. I got the network by the balls on this one.

518. You do? Yeah.

519. I got a meeting with Sheldon right now.

520. It's all gonna be over in a half hour.

521. Good luck, buddy.

522. Well?

523. How'd it go?

524. Got a second, Hank?

525. I, uh, just came in to apologize for, uh,

526. some of the things I said to you a little earlier.

527. Well, you sure do keep it dark in here, don't you?

528. Still doing the spots, huh?

529. What's wrong?

530. Network passed.

531. Network passed.

532. Network passed.

533. What did they say?

534. Uh, let's see, what did they say?

535. They said, uh... (clears throat)

536. "Hey, you, uh, untalented, overpriced, uh, sidekick,

537. "you're just another piece of meat to us,

538. "so why don't you, uh, take what we gave you last year

539. and be happy with that, you worthless piece of shit?" Yeah.

540. Well, look, you know, times are very hard right now.

541. Maybe you should think about taking...

542. last year's, uh, salary.

543. Yeah, well, I can't do that, can I? Why is that?

544. I mean, I can't— W— well, um, why?

545. Well, you see, I've just been on national TV

546. and I've just said, "Oh, well, Hank Kingsley will not cave in,"

547. so I am fucked.

548. What does Artie, uh, have to say about that?

549. I don't know. I can't go to Artie.

550. It's so embar— I mean, it's gonna be bad enough... Uh-huh.

551. when this thing hits the front page of "Variety."

552. The second page at least.

553. You know... (clears throat)

554. you'd think they'd be pissed that you might take the Cavett thing.

555. What's wrong with you? Is there— I mean, is there something wrong with you?

556. You don't understand. What are you talking about? There's something—

557. There's no Cavett, you hear me?

558. What are you— No Cavett.

559. You said there was a Cavett thing. Zip, zip, zip.

560. No Cavett. Zip, zip on Cavett. I'm bluffing.

561. You were bluffing about Cavett. Right, right.

562. I mean, I'm doing the same thing that you did

563. when— when— when you— when you said

564. that you had the offer from the other network.

565. Hank, I had another offer from the other network.

566. That's why I had leverage.

567. I was offered the spot after "Nightline."

568. Oh, my god.

569. I thought you were bluffing.

570. Shel.

571. Jesus, Larry.

572. I could've gotten us a nice table at Musso's.

573. Well, I didn't want anybody to see us, that's all. Okay, then let's be quick,

574. because I have a breakfast with Fred Dryer early in the morning.

575. Oh, boy. You must be so excited.

576. I bet you won't sleep all night.

577. Listen, Shel, what does Hank want exactly?

578. He wants a five percent raise,

579. he wants gross percentage points,

580. he wants three weeks additional paid vacation... All right.

581. and he wants a Hankmobile. What's a Hankmobile?

582. It's that golf cart I told you about last week.

583. I spun you around here.

584. All right, look, uh, don't be so cutthroat with Hank, will ya?

585. Come on. Make a deal and let the man walk away

586. with some dignity. Come on.

587. We're talking about business.

588. We're talking about Hank for god sakes, okay?

589. Give him everything he wants

590. or you know what's gonna happen?

591. I'm off the show.

592. I mean it. He goes, I go, Shel.

593. Oh, come off it.

594. I mean it.

595. Oh, and I suppose you want another one of those fake going away parties?

596. You know what, Shel? I don't have to fake it.

597. I can go on after "Nightline" any time I want.

598. Call Bob Iger over at ABC.

599. He'll tell ya. It ain't gonna work.

600. Well, Shel, you know what?

601. Make it work 'cause, you know, I love being here.

602. I— I don't mean on these stairs.

603. I mean, you know, the network.

604. Will didn't know it was the mannequin.

605. Okay, got it. Thanks.

606. Look at that! (laughs)

607. This is great! Mm-hmm.

608. This is yours? They must love you.

609. Yep. Well, I told you I was gonna get everything, huh?

610. Yeah, this is great. Thank you.

611. Wow.

612. You must be very pleased.

613. I am, uh, very pleased.

614. Did you get the, uh, salary bump?

615. Oh.

616. Yes. All right!

617. What about the, um, syndication points?

618. Well, you know, you see, the thing on the, uh,

619. they— the salary, uh, bump was so great that the,

620. you know, I— I felt I should give them something,

621. so, um, you know, I mean, I don't need

622. uh, you know, syndication points.

623. Oh, oh. What about the vacation?

624. Three weeks? Oh, week and a half.

625. Great. Fine.

626. Great!

627. Good.

628. And this, if they gave you this—

629. this is gorgeous. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

630. Wow.

631. What?

632. I had to pay for it myself,

633. so I, you know, I appreciate you don't tell anybody, okay?

634. Great.

635. Oh, Larry, and I wanna thank you for—

636. for going to bat for me. Really.

637. Beautiful. I don't know what you're talking about.

638. You don't know what I'm talk— I don't.

639. If I— if I go, you go.

640. You know what you did that was smart? What?

641. You got the white interior. Oh, man.

642. Cooler in the summer.

643. Yeah, you've got a very different way

644. of showing your love, don't you?

645. I've seen men be burned in dark interiors and... Yeah. Come on.

646. Come on. Hank, please.

647. Come on. Come on. Please. You know how I feel about this.

648. Don't. No. You're gonna kiss me this time.

649. Come on. Come on.

650. Hank, you're on in ten seconds.

651. All right, okay.

652. Listen, buddy, park this by the—

653. you know, the prop room,

654. and no joyriding, and I'll be back

655. in, uh, 58 minutes exactly, all right?

656. Yeah. Thank you.

657. When you— Huh?

658. You're in your own moment or is there anything wrong? No, just, um...

659. Network is fucked, you know that? You're not in your own moment.

660. No, I'm not in my own moment.

661. and they still don't give Hank everything he wants.

662. What the fuck is that? Oh, poor baby.

663. Well, he seems happy. That's not the issue.

664. Live on tape from Hollywood... That is not the issue.

665. You think the network would care enough about me

666. to do exactly what I tell them to do.

667. It's an insult, Artie.

668. This is an insult.

669. Or you think they'd be nervous that you'd take that offer

670. and go on after "Nightline."

671. That is exactly the point.

672. And now... Well, you did have that offer

673. to go on after "Nightline," didn't you?

674. Larry Sanders!

675. Fuck no.